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Desperate Housewives S02E05
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00:12Previously on Desperate Housewives
00:13The police dug up your father today.
00:15They think that somebody was poisoning him.
00:17Apparently I'm a suspect.
00:19Brie felt threatened by the past.
00:21Get the damn lawyer.
00:22Are you hitting on me?
00:23Gabrielle was threatened by seduction.
00:25Do you mean Julie?
00:26If I come back with you, then I can make it up to her.
00:28I think you should try to find your father first.
00:30Let me help.
00:30And while some threats
00:36Were kept under control
00:38Let's get this over with.
00:40Some were left free to return.
00:46Since her first day on the job,
00:48it had been clear to Lynette Scavo
00:50that her new boss Nina was unusually tense.
00:56To help relieve her tension,
00:58Lynette tried giving her boss thoughtful gifts.
01:01A soothing wave machine.
01:06Aromatherapy candles.
01:10Even meditative chi balls.
01:14But nothing seemed to ease Nina's tension.
01:18Distilled the old-fashioned way.
01:20You know, it actually hurts my teeth to say that out loud.
01:25You folks are going to toddle back to your little holes
01:28and you are going to come up with a decent slogan
01:30or I will can all your asses the old-fashioned way.
01:37Until one day, when it occurred to Lynette,
01:40there was one form of relaxation she had yet to try.
01:46It's a gimlet.
01:48You'll love it.
01:49What exactly is your plan here?
01:50To get me all liquored up so I buy the revised pitch?
01:54Don't be ridiculous.
01:55Could we get a trough of these, please?
02:00I can't remember the last time I was in a bar.
02:02Must have been the last time I had a boyfriend, which was...
02:06Oh, God, I'm a nun.
02:08So why don't you go out and get in the game?
02:10Believe it or not,
02:12when it comes to meeting men, I am...
02:15shy.
02:17Well, I'm not.
02:20So, uh,
02:21what about that guy over there?
02:24He's been checking you out since we walked in.
02:27It's cute.
02:28So go over there.
02:30No.
02:32Oh, for God's sake.
02:33Where are you going?
02:35Lynette, sit.
02:39Hey, Stretch.
02:41See my friend over there?
02:43She thinks you're cute.
02:47Why don't you buy her a drink?
02:53Hey, everybody.
02:55Hi.
02:56Oh, it's a beautiful morning, isn't it?
02:58Thank you, sweetie.
03:00Oh, hey, Lynette.
03:01I read the new Vodka proposal.
03:03Oh, you guys hit it out of the park.
03:06Wow.
03:07I love that color.
03:08Thanks.
03:09Hey, Nina.
03:10Yeah.
03:11And although it had come about in an unexpected manner...
03:15Aren't those the same clothes you were wearing last night in the bar?
03:18Yep.
03:18Nina's tension had finally been released the old-fashioned way.
03:25Good night jerks.
03:27music plays in the areocoop.
03:29I'm soella does.
03:31I'm soella does.
03:34Than I am...
03:43David,
03:44I'm soella does.
03:45What's her, Amanda?
03:46I'm soella.
03:47I'm soauro.
03:47I'm soória.
03:51I'm soella.
04:22Susan Meyer, that dependable someone, was her book agent, Lonnie Moon.
04:28It was Lonnie who helped Susan promote her first children's book.
04:33It was Lonnie who rushed Susan to the hospital the night Julie was born.
04:38It was Lonnie who took Susan's mind off her painful divorce with a fun vacation.
04:45Yes, Lonnie was Susan's rock.
04:49Sadly for Susan, her rock was about to crumble.
04:59Lonnie, what are you doing here?
05:00It's past noon, which means it's now socially acceptable to begin drinking.
05:06I can't believe I let you talk me into this.
05:07I am so behind in my work, but I'm glad I came.
05:10This is fun.
05:12I've got to be honest.
05:13I had an ulterior motive.
05:15Oh?
05:16I've decided to start my own agency.
05:19You're leaving Murren Hunt?
05:20You helped build that place.
05:22I know, but I just feel it's time.
05:25And now the question is, will you come with me?
05:29Well, of course.
05:31Okay.
05:33To the future.
05:36I'll just call the agency and I'll let them know I'm going with you.
05:39Oh, I don't think that's necessary.
05:42Really?
05:43Yeah, I think it might be rude not to.
05:49Lonnie, what's going on?
05:52Okay.
05:54There's been some bad blood between me and the partners.
05:57Why?
05:58I got into this thing where I had to move a little client money around temporarily to cover some expenses.
06:04You had to move money?
06:06What does that mean?
06:07I took a little from here and I moved it there.
06:10It was no big deal.
06:12Really?
06:14Because it sort of sounds like embezzlement.
06:16Why do people keep using that word?
06:19Who else is using that word?
06:20Nobody.
06:22The partners and their forensic accountant.
06:25Oh, my God.
06:27Lonnie, did you move some of my money?
06:30Absolutely not.
06:31I swear.
06:32Susan, don't look at me that way.
06:35I know what I did was wrong.
06:37And I feel like a complete idiot for doing it.
06:39But please, please don't hate me.
06:43Well, I don't hate you.
06:44I couldn't hate you.
06:45You're my Lonnie.
06:50So, will you still come with me?
06:57You know what?
07:00This is one of those times when you find out who your real friends are.
07:03So, yeah.
07:05Oh, thank you.
07:07You are one special lady, Susan Meyer.
07:14Is that the baby's head?
07:15No, that's his foot.
07:19That looks like a head to me.
07:21Well, that settles it.
07:23When this baby's born, I'll be in charge of putting on the socks.
07:27You're glowing today, you know that?
07:30Pregnancy agrees with you.
07:31Yeah?
07:32Well, if you don't mind the hemorrhoids and the nausea, it's quite the party.
07:36I wonder where David is.
07:38He should have been here by now.
07:39So, this new lawyer's good?
07:40He's quite the shark.
07:42You're going to love him.
07:43He hasn't lost a case in six years.
07:45He argued in front of the state Supreme Court.
07:47And he made our conjugal visit happen pretty damn fast.
07:50Oh, hey, I'm a fan already.
07:52Sorry I'm late.
07:54Oh, David.
07:55Good to see you, Gabby.
07:57Carlos, I'm David.
08:14I don't think so.
08:16What the hell are you doing?
08:19That guy's not going to be my lawyer.
08:21Find a new one.
08:25You haven't filed a single charge.
08:27Either determine a homicide or release the body.
08:29We've got a court order which says until we're done with it, the corpse is ours.
08:33He is not a corpse.
08:34He is a man named Rex Vandekamp.
08:37He was a loving husband, a devoted father, and a successful doctor.
08:41So successful, in fact, that he left me enough money to sue the city, this precinct,
08:46and you two gentlemen personally just for the fun of it.
08:48Mrs. Vandekamp, we don't respond well to threats, so if I were you...
08:52Release the body.
08:54What?
08:55The evidence we have is minimal at best.
08:58Mrs. Vandekamp was gracious enough to come down here and take that lie detector test.
09:01I think it's the least we can do for her.
09:06So, uh, what will happen now?
09:09Obviously, we'll put Mr. Vandekamp back just like we found him.
09:12Yes, and I'm sure you will bury him with all the dignity of a dead hamster.
09:16Now, I want Rex released to me, and I will make all the arrangements.
09:21Fine.
09:22And of course, you'll be paying all the costs.
09:25Of course.
09:28Detective Barton, you are clearly a gentleman.
09:40No, it's fine.
09:42I'll pick him up on my way home.
09:44Okay, so, what do you want?
09:46Oh, Parker hates pepperoni.
09:48Um, how about sausage?
09:50Yeah, and a small cheese.
09:52Okay, perfect.
09:53Love you.
09:55Hey, you.
09:56Hey.
09:57You want to hit O'Donnell's?
09:58I owe you a beer.
10:00Actually, I owe you so much more than that.
10:02You're welcome, but I really need to get home.
10:05Oh, come on.
10:05I had such a good time last night.
10:08Um, why don't you ask Trudy?
10:09She loves going out.
10:10Trudy?
10:11Are you kidding?
10:12I don't need the competition.
10:13Have you seen Trudy without her jacket?
10:14She's hot.
10:16Oh, is she now?
10:17I didn't mean that you're not hot.
10:20I just, you're married.
10:22Ah.
10:22You know, you're off the market.
10:24I don't have to worry about fighting you for guys.
10:26Come on, Lynette.
10:28Just one quick little drink.
10:30I was actually starting to think that you and I were becoming pals.
10:34Pals?
10:35Because sometimes it's hard to tell.
10:37You know, I wasn't feeling the love today when you mocked my campaign in front of the clients.
10:42That was just putting on a show for work.
10:45In the future, always assume that I am winking inside.
10:51Come on.
10:52I hate to go to a bar alone.
10:53I feel like such a loser.
10:57Okay.
10:58One drink.
10:59Yeah.
11:00One or two.
11:01No.
11:24Thank you so much for bringing my mail over.
11:27You know, I, I have some of yours in the kitchen.
11:30Well, that's the fourth time.
11:31What's up with this postman?
11:33Um, I know.
11:34He used to be great.
11:36Then he had this stroke and, well, now we're lucky if he doesn't drool on the coupons.
11:41But feel free to snoop around.
11:43I'll be right back.
11:59Now, for those of you just joining us, families in Chicago breathed a sigh of relief today
12:03as an arrest was finally made in the brutal attack on local high school student, Melanie Foster.
12:09But word of the suspect's capture becomes a small comfort to the Foster family.
12:13Daddy?
12:14She lost her 17-year-old daughter almost four months ago.
12:17The victim's body was covered in a local park less than a mile from Hackborough High.
12:20All right.
12:23She lost her.
12:25She lost her.
12:27She lost her.
12:30Sorry.
12:46She was shot.
12:48that the whole thing happened in the first place.
12:50I mean, how in the world could anybody accuse me of murder?
12:54Well, you are wound pretty tight.
12:58What? The supermom is always the first to snap.
13:01They've done studies.
13:03Anyway, I was hoping that you were all free Friday morning
13:06because that's when I'm going to be hosting the reburial.
13:10The what?
13:12Look, I know it's an imposition,
13:13but Danielle is away on a class trip
13:15and Andrew is back at Camp Hennessy for a little refresher course.
13:19Well, it's just going to be a very brief and dignified ceremony,
13:23and I was hoping that you could say a few words,
13:25and I'm going to read a poem.
13:29We would love to come.
13:31Absolutely.
13:35I'm busy. Sorry.
13:38Edie, she's going to read a poem.
13:41Ow!
13:43Fine, yes, yes, we'd all love to come.
13:48Well, thank you.
13:50You don't know how much this means to me.
13:53I realized looking back that I was still in shock
13:56during Rex's first funeral.
13:58I don't think it had quite hit me at what had happened,
14:01so that's why this small ceremony means so much to me,
14:05because I realize now that
14:09this is the last chance I'm going to have to say goodbye.
14:17Unless, of course, they dig him up again.
14:23Sure.
14:25There was times when Lisa was rude and obnoxious,
14:28but I know now that
14:30there was no excuse to always be beating on her.
14:34Baby, I'm just so sorry.
14:41Good job, you two.
14:42This is an example of how to use incarceration to your benefit.
14:46It's a chance for people to take a step back
14:48and observe the obstacles they face in their marriage.
14:52Can I go now?
14:53Because I have a lot to say about the obstacles I'm facing in my marriage.
14:56We don't got any obstacles.
14:58Yes, we do, Lamar.
14:59We got big ones.
15:00Okay, hold on.
15:00You two.
15:01I think that it's Carlos and Gabrielle's turn.
15:04Thanks, but we're good.
15:10This is your third group session,
15:11but you have yet to share anything.
15:13Come on.
15:15Talk to us.
15:16How's your marriage?
15:18Shaky at best.
15:20And why is that?
15:21I don't know.
15:22I hired a brilliant lawyer
15:23to get my husband out of this hellhole,
15:25and he fired him for no reason at all.
15:27Carlos?
15:29I just didn't like him.
15:31Why not?
15:31He's experienced, he's intelligent, he's successful.
15:34Exactly.
15:34I'd prefer an attorney you didn't find so damn appealing.
15:37Oh, my God.
15:37You fired him because you're jealous?
15:39Don't I have the right to?
15:40You know, she cheated on me.
15:42Oh, Bob, you beat your wife.
15:44You are so not allowed to gasp.
15:45Don't you talk that way to him.
15:46One reward out of you, Lisa,
15:47and I will backhand you myself.
15:49Okay, calm down.
15:50Thousands of fatball attorneys out there in the world,
15:52and she's got to get the one that looks like an underwear model.
15:54I'm not discussing this anymore.
15:55You can rot in here for all I care.
16:01So, um, Mona,
16:04what do you feel are the biggest problems in your marriage?
16:06By the way, he was wearing a suit.
16:08How do you know he had a good body?
16:09Do you know?
16:10No.
16:11I bet he's hot.
16:16Do I need to say what our biggest problem is,
16:18or can everybody figure it out for themselves?
16:26Why are you reading that contract?
16:27I told you.
16:28Lonnie wants me to sign with this new agency.
16:31But you didn't say you were seriously thinking about going with him.
16:34I know.
16:35I know.
16:37Just Lonnie's family.
16:39You know, he's always been there for me.
16:41He paid my rent when I was waiting for my first royalty check.
16:44He called me every day when Carl left.
16:46I mean, I just owe him so much.
16:48Susan, he committed a felony.
16:50Okay, who in this room has not committed a felony?
16:52Raise your hand.
16:53Uh-uh-uh.
16:54Not so fast.
16:55Your agent represents you.
16:57You've got to be able to trust him.
16:58How's that going to be possible now?
17:01Well, it's possible, because I have faith in people.
17:05I mean, Lonnie knows you messed up,
17:06and he's sorry he's making restitution.
17:09What, you don't believe people deserve second chances?
17:11Not when they messed up this much, no.
17:14Really?
17:16So that's it with you?
17:17You just get one shot, and you screw up, and you're out?
17:19I didn't know you were such a cynic.
17:22I'm sorry.
17:23All right, I guess it's just the way I'm wired.
17:27But I got a job over in Greenwood, so...
17:29I'll cut you later in, mate.
17:39You okay?
17:43Julie.
17:46I did something bad.
17:47Something really, really bad.
17:53Aren't you going to ask me what it was?
17:54Do I ever have to?
17:57Last week, when Mike and I went to the park searching for Zach,
18:02I sort of found him.
18:04No.
18:05Yes.
18:05And I gave him money, and I sent him away.
18:08And I didn't tell Mike.
18:10Holy crap, what are you going to do?
18:11I don't know.
18:13What would you do if this happened to you?
18:16See, this would never happen to me.
18:17This kind of thing only happens to you.
18:19Will you stop judging and help me?
18:21Well, obviously, you're going to have to tell him.
18:23Well, I can't do that.
18:24You heard what he said about his wiring.
18:26I betrayed him.
18:27He'll never forgive me.
18:28Okay.
18:29Don't tell him.
18:29Well, how could I not?
18:30I feel so guilty.
18:31I can barely look him in the eye when he talks about Zach.
18:34So, where do you think Zach went?
18:38You tall.
18:42Oh, Lord.
18:43Why did I do this?
18:45I have a feeling you did it for me.
19:07Hey, girl.
19:08I hope you are in the mood for margaritas, because it is tonight at O'Donnell's.
19:14Oh, fun.
19:14But I can't go tonight, because I promised the twins that I would help them finish their
19:18science project.
19:20Lynette, if the late hours are going to be an issue for you, we probably should talk about
19:27finding you a less demanding account.
19:30You're going to take me off-camera off because I won't go drinking with you?
19:33No.
19:34Oh, God, no, honey.
19:36I get it.
19:36You have a family.
19:38Home has to come first for you.
19:41I mean, for me, the client comes first.
19:43Being a perfectionist is my own neurotic issue, and I know that I really need to work on that.
19:47But trust me, I will never sleep again if this campaign gets mucked up.
19:53I'll figure something out.
19:54You go home.
19:55Have a good night.
19:57Nina?
19:59Yeah?
20:01I can handle the extra hours.
20:04Oh, Lynette, you sure?
20:06Yeah.
20:07I'll get my coat.
20:11Wow, this place is rowdy after happy hour, huh?
20:15Yeah.
20:18Hey, look at that guy right there at the end of the bar, the shoulders with the tan jacket.
20:23Yeah?
20:24Go get him for me.
20:25Yeah, you sure?
20:35Hey.
20:57Hey there.
21:08So, they're going on about Melanie Foster on the news.
21:14It's time we talked about her, Caleb.
21:19Until you start accepting responsibility for what happened, you know I can't let you out of here.
21:33What the hell is this?
21:35Mom!
21:37Where are you?
21:39I'll be right back.
21:42And I will expect you to answer me.
21:44Where are you?
21:46I'm coming! Coming!
21:55What were you going to do with this?
21:57Don't.
21:58I know who really killed Melanie Foster.
22:00You've arrested the wrong man.
22:01What are you thinking?
22:02The police need to know the truth.
22:04The hell they do! This is our chance!
22:06We are poor people.
22:08Don't let an innocent man go to jail.
22:10You want to do the right thing?
22:11Well, then call 911 and tell him you've got a killer locked up in the basement.
22:14He is not a killer.
22:15He was confused.
22:17He didn't know what he was doing.
22:19He knows a lot more than you give him credit for.
22:22I'm mailing the letter.
22:24Do you realize what's going to happen?
22:26Mom, are you thinking this through?
22:29I'm mailing the letter.
22:31If you do, you better hope to God they don't find us.
22:38Because they're not going to care how slow Caleb is.
22:41They'll just execute him.
22:46Nothing to do.
22:46I can't do it.
22:52Mom.
23:08Mom.
23:09Mom.
23:09Mom.
23:09Mom.
23:10Mom.
23:10Mom.
23:13Lonnie?
23:15Susan?
23:15What are you doing here?
23:17Well, I just came over to give you the contracts.
23:20Your door was open.
23:21Oh, great.
23:24Sorry, this place is such a mess.
23:27I've been working here till we get the new offices painted.
23:30Wait till you see them.
23:32They're going to be really beautiful.
23:36Where's Jeannie?
23:38She's with the kids up in Minnesota visiting her mom.
23:41They love it up there.
23:43Keep changing the date on, dear old dad.
23:51There's no electricity.
23:53There isn't?
23:55I'm such a dummy.
23:57I've been so swamped I must have forgotten to pay the electric bill.
24:03Lonnie, how much financial trouble are you really in?
24:10I'm fine.
24:14You know what it is?
24:15I had to pay all those people back at the same time.
24:18Restitution plus interest.
24:19It's not something I'd recommend.
24:21It sucks you dry.
24:24I'm going to ask you a question, and I want you to tell me the truth.
24:27Please, did you steal from me?
24:30Please, did you steal from me?
24:30Absolutely not.
24:31Please, don't lie.
24:33Just tell me.
24:35Is that what you want to hear?
24:37Do I have to say it so that we can move on?
24:43Fine.
24:44I did it.
24:45But yours was the first money I paid back, so the slate's been wiped clean.
24:50Let's just move past it.
24:52Suze.
24:55I'm sorry.
24:56I just can't trust you anymore.
24:58Yes, you can.
24:58No, I can't.
24:59You can.
25:00Can't.
25:01Give me the contract.
25:02No.
25:05Okay.
25:06Okay.
25:06Okay.
25:06Fine.
25:09What are you doing?
25:11Are you trying to take me down with you?
25:13I am not going down.
25:16Ow!
25:16My life is great.
25:19I have never been happier, and I've never been fitter.
25:23Get off me, you Amazon.
25:38What are you doing here?
25:39You left me a message.
25:41You said you wanted to talk.
25:42Yeah.
25:43I thought you'd schedule an appointment later.
25:46Right now, I'm sort of disgusting and sweaty.
25:49I'm a criminal lawyer.
25:50I've seen worse.
26:01So, did you find a new lawyer for Mr. Charles?
26:03Are you charming?
26:03I don't want a new lawyer.
26:05I want you.
26:06So does Carlos.
26:06He just doesn't realize it yet.
26:08It's a 1988 Romani Conti La Tache.
26:11I'm impressed.
26:12Look, to be honest, Carlos is a little threatened by you.
26:15He thinks if we spend too much time together that something might happen.
26:21Somebody's got an active imagination.
26:23Cork's true.
26:25No, David, we're not here to drink wine, okay?
26:27This is business.
26:29Now, you have to convince Carlos that he can trust you.
26:33How am I going to do that?
26:35I don't know.
26:36Tell him you're happily married or gay.
26:40Yeah, right.
26:41You're a lawyer.
26:42You lie to juries all the time.
26:44Can't you just make something up?
26:45I'm past the point in my career where I have to beg for work.
26:47I'm sorry.
26:48Okay, David.
26:49I'm holding my marriage together by my fingernails.
26:52If Carlos serves his full sentence, I don't think we're going to make it.
26:54So, please, I need you.
26:57I'll say this much for Carlos.
26:59He's got excellent taste.
27:02In wine.
27:04Montroche.
27:05It's good stuff.
27:07Are you going to help me or not?
27:09We'll go see Carlos tomorrow.
27:10I'll turn him around for you.
27:12Really?
27:13What are you going to say?
27:14Play it by ear.
27:16I don't want to sound too over-reversed.
27:19Hey, that's my wine.
27:21Get deducted from my bill.
27:26It all started with bad real estate investments.
27:30You should have just come clean.
27:33Yeah, well, you tell one lie, the second one comes easy.
27:37Then you're making up new lies to cover up the old ones.
27:40Pretty soon you can't turn back, you know?
27:43I do.
27:46When Jeannie finally caught on, she took the kids, she took the furniture, the bank locked me out of my
27:53own house.
27:56Wow.
27:59That's why I can't lose you as a client.
28:02Well, I'm sorry, but you have.
28:05I don't blame you.
28:07You'll never lose my friendship, though.
28:10I mean that.
28:11Really?
28:12Of course.
28:14You're my Lonnie.
28:17You're my Susie.
28:20You're my Susie.
28:25Oh, what the hell is wrong with you?
28:29I'm your Lonnie.
28:29That's what you said.
28:30Not like that.
28:31But I thought, I mean, there's always been this magnetism.
28:34No, there has not been.
28:36And there never will be.
28:38Oh, my God.
28:39But I was just coming clean.
28:45Hey, Morgan.
28:49Got a letter from some guy claiming he attacked Melanie Foster.
28:52You ran me down for that?
28:54I got dozens of coops coming out of the woodwork, all saying we arrested the wrong guy.
28:59This one knows about the axe.
29:18There you go, Mrs. Vandekamp.
29:21The hearse is right outside, so if you'll just follow me.
29:24Oh, shoot.
29:25There's a form I need you to sign.
29:26I think I left it back in the office.
29:28That's all right.
29:28I'll wait.
29:29Okay.
29:37I'm here, sweetheart.
29:40And I'm gonna take care of everything.
29:43But you knew that, didn't you?
29:44You've always known that you can count on me.
29:48Mrs. Vandekamp.
29:50Detective Barton, what are you doing here?
29:52Oh, just taking care of some business.
29:55Is this...?
29:56Yes.
29:58This is Rex.
30:00I want to thank you again for what you did.
30:03It was so refreshing to be treated with kindness after weeks of just ludicrous accusations.
30:10The doctor doesn't think they're ludicrous.
30:12Well, I know, but Rex died in his care.
30:14I mean, of course, he'd like to blame someone else.
30:16But the tests he did, uh...
30:17Oh, please don't talk to me about tests.
30:20Rex was not poisoned, and no one I know believes that he was.
30:24Rex did.
30:26What?
30:27Well, the doctor told Rex he was being poisoned, and Rex believed him.
30:31How would you know that?
30:33Oh!
30:43Where did you get this?
30:45We found that in Rex's bed after he died.
30:47That is his handwriting, isn't it?
30:57You know what I think?
31:00Rex...
31:02...felt guilty for the way he treated you.
31:05The adultery, the public humiliations.
31:09That's why he forgave you.
31:10He understood why you did it.
31:13How could he have believed this?
31:16Look, my wife cheated on me, too. I know how much it hurts.
31:22And so will a judge.
31:23Everyone understands crimes of passion.
31:27But every day that you stonewall makes you look more and more like a cold, calculating killer.
31:35We both know that's not you.
31:39But I can't help you, unless you start telling the truth.
31:52I'm sorry, but I... I have to go. I have some things that I need to take care of.
32:04Bree, it is obvious your husband loved you very much. Don't you think you owe to him to admit the
32:08truth?
32:09Detective, I know exactly what my husband deserves. Now, would you be a dear?
32:35What's he doing here?
32:37I have a pitch for you.
32:41I want to explain to you why I think it's in your best interest for you to allow me to
32:43represent you.
32:46Oh, for Pete's sake, Carlos. At least listen to the man.
32:51I guess it beats sitting in my cell.
32:55Now, I don't think you have a problem with me as a lawyer. Clearly, I'm the real deal.
32:59I sense your problem with me is more personal.
33:02You sense right?
33:03You want to know if I'm interested in sleeping with your wife?
33:07Well, the answer is yes.
33:16Carlos, he's kidding.
33:20Tell him you're kidding.
33:21Shut it.
33:23Now, clearly, Gabrielle is willful, self-centered, and manipulative.
33:28She's also beautiful enough to be worth the trouble.
33:31So, the minute we leave this room, I'm going to aggressively pursue her.
33:34And when I succeed, which I will, we're going to fly to my chateau in Chamonix and have dinner in
33:38our local bistro.
33:38They make the best raclette in all of Europe.
33:40I'll make love by the fire and afterwards do a little midnight skiing.
33:44You ski, don't you?
33:48You're athletic. You'll learn.
33:50Anyway, all of this only happens if you fire me.
33:53If you keep me on as your lawyer, your wife's off limits.
33:56I'd get this barred for sleeping with the client's wife, and nobody's worth that, not even her.
34:01So, that's my pitch.
34:04I'll let you think back.
34:10Honey, I am so sorry.
34:12Obviously, that guy's insane.
34:14Well, you just can't wait, can you?
34:18What?
34:20He's my lawyer.
34:22But, Carlos...
34:22And that's all there is to it.
34:29I see you.
34:33How about a dance?
34:35How about it?
34:36Yes.
34:37Well, you guys have fun.
34:39This is the fifth night in a row.
34:41I haven't been home to tuck in my kids, so...
34:43I'm gonna go.
34:44No, you're gonna stay put.
34:46It is Friday night, and you have all weekend to play with your kids.
34:50Watch my purse.
35:04Hey.
35:06I'm Chuck.
35:07Chuck, I'm gonna stop you right there.
35:10Happily married.
35:12Well, looks like we have got something in common.
35:21Uh...
35:22Chuck, get your hand off my thigh.
35:26No, not up my thigh.
35:28Off it.
35:30Come on, what's the matter with you?
35:32I'm not available, and I'm not that easy.
35:34Well, what are you doing in a pick-up bar at 10.30 at night?
35:36Well, I don't usually do this.
35:39Oh, come on.
35:40Honey, who are you kidding?
35:41I've seen you here every night this week.
35:42You're a regular.
35:44At that moment, it occurred to Lynette that Chuck, though inebriated, had a valid point.
35:50The time had come to declare a war of independence.
35:53And the surest path to victory would require an aggressive campaign of shock and awe.
36:05You're a regular.
36:07You're a regular.
36:22You're a regular.
36:24You're a regular.
36:25You're a regular.
36:27You're a regular.
36:28You're a regular.
36:28You're a regular.
36:28You're a regular.
36:28You're a regular.
36:29You're a regular.
36:30You're a regular.
36:32You're a regular.
36:33You're a regular.
36:33You're a regular.
36:33You're a regular.
36:33You're a regular.
36:34You're a regular.
37:06It's crazy here tonight. Don't you want to dance?
37:10No thanks. I think I'll sit this one out.
37:14Lynette savored her victory, confident that she would never again have to engage her opponent on this particular battlefield.
37:22I love this song. Here, hold my purse.
37:39Brie, where have you been? We were starting to get worried.
37:41I'm sorry. I was just attending to some last-minute details. Right this way.
37:46Where are we going?
37:47To Rex's gravesite.
37:49Well, I thought this was his gravesite.
37:50I'm changing it.
37:51Why?
37:52Well, he did something to upset me, and I want him gone.
37:54What did he do?
37:55You know, it's so unpleasant. I'd rather not get into it.
37:58Have you seen these gravestones? Some are from the 1800s. Just fascinating.
38:02Brie, wait. You're going to have to explain. Rex is dead. What could he have done to upset you?
38:11My husband, the man I spent my life with for 18 years, died thinking that I murdered him.
38:16What?
38:17Yes, the cardiologist shared this moronic theory with Rex, and Rex believed him.
38:22Are you sure?
38:22Yes, because he left a note, and it said, and I quote,
38:26Brie, I understand, and I forgive you.
38:32I spent 18 years of my life with this man.
38:35How could he not know me?
38:38Well, maybe he was forgiving you for something else.
38:44I have done nothing to be forgiven for.
38:48I was a fantastic wife.
38:50When he was sick, I nursed him.
38:52When we were low on money, I stayed within a budget.
38:54I cooked his meals.
38:56I mended his clothes.
38:57For the love of God, I used to check his back for acne.
39:00When that miserable son of a bitch
39:04has the nerve to understand and forgive me,
39:07while it jokes on him, because I do not understand,
39:09and I do not forgive.
39:16Hi.
39:17We're just going to a funeral.
39:21Right this way.
39:34Honey, I know you're hurt,
39:35but are you sure you're not going to change your mind?
39:37I mean, there's no turning back after this.
39:39If you think I'm going to lay next to someone for eternity
39:41who thinks I'm a murderer, you're crazy.
39:43As far as I'm concerned,
39:45let him decompose with strangers.
40:03Everyone in the world needs someone they can depend on.
40:07Be they faithful friends,
40:12determined advocates,
40:18or a loving family.
40:22But occasionally in life,
40:25the people we thought would always be there for us leave.
40:32And if that happens,
40:35it's amazing the lengths we'll go to
40:39to get them back.
41:08and we'll be back.
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