- 2 days ago
Hacks. S05 - E04
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00:04And so, without further ado, welcome to the stage, you know her, she pays you, Debra Vann!
00:17Thank you, thank you. So, I know you haven't seen me in a while. When Hollywood wants to get rid
00:25of
00:25a woman, they just say she was difficult. But a man gets away with having sex with his stepdaughter
00:30because, well, that's just his process. Am I right, y'all? The reports of my death were fake news.
00:41As was Us Weekly every time they published, I didn't wear it better, y'all.
00:46Y'all again. What is that?
00:51Sorry.
00:53Let's get to the persecution pyramid!
01:00Every woman who has ever done something brave or unexpected is either called crazy,
01:04shot in the face, or even worse, thwarted by a contract she didn't read closely enough.
01:13Oh, I'm so sorry. Hey, you. Yeah, I'm just in the meeting.
01:17All right, let's take a break.
01:22So, yeah, maybe we want to rethink the persecution pyramid and also the, um, just all of it, I think?
01:28No, it's the crowd. I mean, they work for me. I paid people to be here. It's a completely
01:32different dynamic than at a comedy club. Besides, Josefina's in a mood because I don't like her new
01:36water filter. Totally. I think maybe we want to focus on, like, what's been funny about the past
01:41few years, and then we can sort of work in the systematic oppression of it all, if we must.
01:47I'm going to get to the funny, but if comedy says something, it's supposed to make you uncomfortable.
01:51I mean, you're the one who always says that it doesn't have to be a laugh a minute.
01:54No, I know, but it's kind of a Smith College commencement address at the moment.
01:58So sorry about that. That was the Paley Center. Unfortunately, they're not willing to move the Who's
02:03Making Dinner event. Do they know that I won't be able to speak at it?
02:06Because of the gag order? Yes, but they're adamant that the anniversary event should take place on the
02:10anniversary and not, you know, nine months later. Oh. People are so dramatic about time. Why can't
02:17they just be more flexible about dates? You know, like I am, about my birthday. Not everybody is as
02:21easy to work with as you are. But look, they still want you to attend, you know, and pose for
02:24some
02:24photos. And I can circle back with your lawyer. Maybe you learning sign language is a fun loophole.
02:29Oh. Oh, I know, a little. Oh.
02:32Hey. Okay. Well, I'm sorry. That's not nice.
02:36I think she's hangry. Always. She doesn't eat. Yeah. But you, I have really good news for her.
02:42Oh. So, remember Jessica Duncan, the exec who made my bet? Yeah.
02:45Well, she got a huge new job. And guess what? What? She loved your script.
02:50You know what? She is one of the good ones. I have always liked her.
02:54Well, she wants to sit down with you, and I'm going to schedule a meeting when you're in town for
02:56the Who's
02:57Making Dinner event. Oh my god, you are the best in the biz. I'm flailing, but thank you.
03:00Put this thing on. Because I got a couple things to get off my chest, too. First up,
03:05these Russians. No, no, no. And I'm not talking about the dolls. No, no, no.
03:09Styling Steve Renning is what they're talking about. Oh my god.
03:15Make my lips bigger. Bigger.
03:20Whoa. We having a yard sale? Oh, the Paley Center wants some memorabilia and photos for the Who's
03:25Making Dinner exhibition. How's this? That's good. Now give Frank some dark circles.
03:30Mm-hmm. And a big fat double chin.
03:33Cloning now. What are you doing?
03:35We're... What did you call it?
03:37We're yassifying Deborah.
03:39And we're de-yassifying Frank.
03:41I mean, if I can't speak at the event honoring my show, the least I can do is make my
03:46nasty,
03:46Bastard-ass, cheating ex-husband look like shit.
03:49Not sure a media preservation nonprofit's gonna love that.
03:52I'm just giving them options. Apparently Kathy already sent some photos over.
03:58She's not gonna be there. Thank god.
04:01Is this the original pilot script?
04:05Yeah.
04:07I'm sorry. How the hell did he get Soul Creator credit?
04:12We wrote the pilot together, and then he said,
04:15Oh, Deb, I'm just gonna put my name on this first one, and then you can put yours on the
04:20second one.
04:21I was so naive, I didn't know that whoever writes the first episode from then on is considered the creator.
04:27Right.
04:28He said it was an innocent mistake, but he knew what he was doing.
04:32He never wanted me to get any credit.
04:36Now I have another bastard trying to erase me.
04:38That's why my MSG show has to be historic, has to be record-breaking.
04:44How's this? Before and after.
04:49Amazing.
04:49That is exactly how I remember it. Wow.
04:52Oh, you think that's good? Wait till you see what she did to my grandson.
04:56No.
04:57Isn't he adorable?
04:58You guys can't Photoshop a baby.
04:59Yes, you can.
05:01Oh, my god. Did you snatch his waist?
05:03Oh, yes. He's so fit.
05:14I just have to say, I am so proud of the work we did together on Debra's special.
05:22I was so pissed when I saw that they took it down. It was motherfuckers.
05:26No, we, yeah, we were devastated.
05:28And what Bob Lipka did to my girl Debra, I mean, that is bullshit.
05:33Oh, completely agree.
05:35Guillotine.
05:35Thank fucking god. I don't work there anymore.
05:39Mm-hmm.
05:40Oh, okay. All right. Vibe shift.
05:41Yes.
05:42Mall girl.
05:43Yeah.
05:44You know, Jimmy said that I would like your script. I didn't.
05:49I loved it!
05:52Thank you. That is so nice.
05:55A modern-day retelling of The Wizard of Oz set in a 90s mall literally written for me.
06:03It's so smart.
06:08You know, see, I loved when the girl gets her ears pierced and it gets infected,
06:12and then the Hot Topic goths have to take her to the hospital. My heart broke for her.
06:18Oh, that is, that's really nice to hear.
06:21Yeah. No, it's so nuanced. It's so specific.
06:26Oh, it's so original. So obviously we can never make it.
06:30Oh, yeah.
06:33But what else you got?
06:35Uh, that was all that I, I was kind of doing at the, at the mom, at the mom mall.
06:40Well, I really want your next TV show. So here's what I'm going to do.
06:45Sight unseen, whatever you got, I will buy it. Cash advance, blind script deal.
06:49Oh my God. Really?
06:51Yeah.
06:51Thank you. Could, I mean, could mall girl be a series?
06:55No.
06:56No.
06:56So something you're more passionate about, right, but also hits the young demo?
07:00Okay.
07:01Diverse, of course. Queer, queer counts.
07:05Yes. I see a girl, LGBT, AIQ+, not too political, not too poor, hard, funny.
07:11Okay.
07:12But passion first.
07:14Well, I mean, look, it's, I think for me, finding an idea that I'm immediately passionate about.
07:20Right, right.
07:20Easy as pot.
07:21Yeah. But no limited series.
07:23Yeah.
07:23Limited series, bad.
07:24Yes.
07:25Bad, bad, bad.
07:28Yeah. That should be easy.
07:35Just because I am not the prettiest girl you ever did see, and even if I don't have such a
07:48wonderful personality...
07:51So she didn't start as a stand-up?
07:53No, she starred in the show with her husband, and, um, you know, she got famous from the sitcom.
07:57Ah, I mean, I think she's cuter, but I also think she's hotter now. I like a one with a
08:01little patina on them, eh?
08:02Oh, yeah. Jimmy.
08:05Beth!
08:06Oh, hi. It's so nice to finally meet you in person.
08:09Wow.
08:11Um, uh, this is, uh, Kayla and Randy.
08:14Hi. Welcome to Paley Fest.
08:15Thanks for having us.
08:16Yeah.
08:17I had my bat mitzvah here.
08:18I'm not Jewish, but the theme was on affairs.
08:20Yeah, it was a great bat mitzvah.
08:22Um, anyway, thank you again for all your help.
08:24I know there was a lot of back and forth with all the Deborah stuff.
08:26It is literally my pleasure, and I actually remember that you are a coffee snob.
08:31Guilty.
08:32So I just got you a cold brew.
08:33That is so nice.
08:36Well, cold brew is like sex, even when it's bad.
08:40I'm grateful.
08:41Whoa.
08:41So true.
08:42Um, mm-hmm.
08:44Yeah.
08:45No, but seriously, the coffee here is just dog shit.
08:47But welcome to the nonprofit world.
08:49You know what I mean?
08:50I'm like, take me with you, please.
08:53Wish we could, you know?
08:54Uh, we are downsizing.
08:56God, stop.
08:57I'm talking to someone.
08:58I have to take this, but I will find you in a little bit.
09:01Okay, cool.
09:03Bye.
09:03Thank you again.
09:04Cheers.
09:05Yeah.
09:08What the hell is going on?
09:11What?
09:12You're being sexual at work.
09:14You're never like that.
09:15I mean, it was like watching two jail rats ratting up the bathroom.
09:19What are you talking about?
09:20You were laughing at her voices.
09:22You were like, ah-ha-ha-ha-ha.
09:23What?
09:24We were just being...
09:24That wasn't even the best voice.
09:26I mean, it was kind of funny, but not anything like my Jamaican accent.
09:28We retired your Jamaican accent after what happened with that waiter.
09:31And I was just being nice.
09:32We've been emailing each other for months, you know?
09:34Okay, emails first base.
09:35I mean, the last person I emailed, we ended up fucking Jimmy.
09:38Oh my God, the HVAC guy?
09:40Ew, no.
09:41The exterminator.
09:42You slept with Adnan?
09:43Yeah.
09:44Whatever.
09:44My emails were strictly professional.
09:46Yeah, I don't know.
09:47I was on those emails, boss, and you were using a lot of exclamation marks,
09:51which for a man is the equivalent of exposing his genitals.
09:55Whatever.
09:56I was just being friendly.
09:57Oh yeah?
09:58Is it friendly to have your tits out?
09:59Button up, slut.
10:01She wants you to lay that pipe down.
10:02I'm telling you.
10:03You really think so?
10:05I mean, that's flattering.
10:05I never get cruised, but...
10:07She was wearing a wedding ring.
10:08She's married.
10:09Who cares?
10:10You never had sex with a married person?
10:11Not that I know of.
10:13Have you?
10:13Yeah, I just told you, Adnan.
10:16Who cares?
10:17It's L.A.
10:17I mean, 90% of the marriages are open, the other 10% heading for divorce,
10:20because they tried being open.
10:22Hmm, not my fault.
10:23All right.
10:23I think you two are really over-exaggerating, okay?
10:26Hmm, we'll see what happens.
10:29Enjoy your coffee and honey on this.
10:31Nice and cute together.
10:33Yeah, so now I just have to come up with the premise for a show.
10:35And you know what's always been interesting to me?
10:37The woman in urgent care who comes in before the doctor.
10:41She's not a nurse, you know?
10:43She's something else.
10:45Like, what if I told her story?
10:47Very compelling.
10:48I know, right?
10:52Oh, my God.
10:53Wow.
10:55You know, it's so cool that something you made so long ago is being celebrated like this.
11:00Well, it endured because it was important.
11:02It said something.
11:03That's what I've been saying I want my MSG show to do.
11:06Totally, totally, totally.
11:10Hmm.
11:16The oven line, that was so good.
11:18You liked it?
11:19Yeah, you wrote it too, right?
11:20Did I write that one?
11:21You know you did.
11:23Oh, yeah, I did.
11:24Okay, okay.
11:26Check out this hottie.
11:30Oh, yeah, Gino.
11:32He was wonderful.
11:34He died of AIDS.
11:35He was so young.
11:37Can you imagine being me in this situation?
11:39I point to a photo of a Hawkeye and you're like, he died of AIDS?
11:42Just lie to me, you maniac.
11:44But I'm sorry for your loss.
11:48Yeah, stop.
11:56He's lucky he's dead or there'd be a bullet with his name on it.
11:59Uh-huh.
12:04Where are you going?
12:05To find a martini with my name on it.
12:12My dentist is such a pervert.
12:14And she's a girl.
12:15Ah.
12:19Shit.
12:20I think you guys are right.
12:22Hmm?
12:22I think that she might be interested.
12:24We're not going to feel bad for you.
12:25You're basically bragging.
12:26No, I'm not bragging.
12:28Okay, she's coming.
12:28She's coming.
12:29She's coming.
12:29Showtime.
12:31She's here.
12:34Hey.
12:34Hello, Beth.
12:35Um, I reserved a seat for you up front.
12:38Next to me.
12:39Oh, wow.
12:40Uh, thank you so much.
12:41But you know what?
12:42I think I'm just going to do my own thing and bop around.
12:45During the screening?
12:46Mm-hmm.
12:47Because it'll be dark.
12:49So you're going to have to climb over the people sitting down.
12:52He gets restless leg syndrome in the middle of the day.
12:55Yeah, yeah, yeah.
12:55I think it's good to just keep it moving, you know?
12:57Get my steps in.
12:58Get the circulation going.
13:00I'm sorry.
13:01Oh, don't step on that.
13:02Sorry.
13:02Oh, oh, oh.
13:03Oh, Jesus.
13:04Oh, my gosh.
13:05I'm so sorry.
13:07She ran right into me.
13:08She came out of nowhere.
13:08Can people just give her some space?
13:10Jesus.
13:11Give her a little bit of space.
13:12Are you seeing this?
13:13My pelvis.
13:13Come on, come on.
13:14Jimmy, are you there?
13:15Can you hold my hand?
13:16Wait, what?
13:16My pelvis.
13:17Just breathe.
13:18Look, she's fine.
13:18She's fine.
13:19Oh.
13:20Oh.
13:20Oh, perfect.
13:22Kittle, one martini, two olives, a little dirty.
13:26Hi, Deborah.
13:34Thanks, Marcia.
13:36They love it.
13:36Isn't that crazy?
13:38And now it's just Friday, right?
13:40So imagine what I did Saturday.
13:42Oh.
13:42It's just a lot.
13:43Yeah.
13:44If you were there, you could have protected me.
13:46Here's your martini, ma'am.
13:48Deborah.
13:49Eddie fucking Bean is here.
13:51He's like my favorite director from when I was a kid.
13:54It's a little before your time, no?
13:56No.
13:57What are you talking about?
13:57I grew up on Nick at Night.
13:59Bewitched was the closest thing we had to drag race back then.
14:02Well, I'll introduce you.
14:03He's a doll.
14:04Eddie.
14:06Oh, excuse me.
14:06Wow.
14:07Debbie, wow.
14:08I didn't know you were going to be here.
14:09Of course.
14:10I wouldn't miss it.
14:11Hi.
14:12So glad to see you.
14:13This is Ava.
14:14Ava Daniels, Eddie Bean.
14:15How's it going?
14:16I'm such a huge fan.
14:17My Tinder bio used to be your quote about the power of story.
14:20I didn't meet my soulmate, but a bunch of people did ask me
14:23to read their scripts, and that's something.
14:25Sure.
14:26Eddie directed the pilot of Who's Making Dinner?
14:28God, I've launched my whole career.
14:30So basically, you owe me 10% of everything you've got.
14:32Yeah.
14:33Oh, Deb.
14:35Glad to see you still have your sense of humor.
14:37I'm just glad to see you're out.
14:40I heard about the breakdown.
14:43And I have a friend who has the mental troubles.
14:47It's rough stuff.
14:49Thank you, Eddie.
14:50It means a lot.
14:51Yeah.
14:51Oh, did you hear?
14:53They're going to show some new footage of Frank tonight.
14:55Excuse me?
14:56Yeah, an unaired interview.
15:01I'm so glad Frank's being allowed to speak.
15:03Wish I could say the same for Joan of Arc.
15:06She's doing a lot of, um, research on Joan of Arc right now for comedy.
15:12Hmm.
15:14Funny.
15:16Ah, Deb.
15:17Take care.
15:23I always hated that guy.
15:24Yeah.
15:25He thinks I have mental problems.
15:26He is clearly in cognitive decline.
15:28Yeah.
15:29And his prostate's probably the size of a cantaloupe.
15:32Deborah, can we get some photos with you?
15:34Absolutely.
15:35Great.
15:36Right this way.
15:37Puff pastry?
15:38Oh, no, thank you.
15:40I've been, uh, pretty weird with dairy ever since this guy I dated sawed me in half.
15:45Hey, can I ask you something?
15:47Um, would you watch a show about gator waiters?
15:50And, like, maybe, like, every episode takes place at a different event?
15:52Like Party Down.
15:54Really great show.
15:55Great.
15:57Ideas.
15:58Ideas.
15:59Something in a dome?
16:00Shit.
16:01Under the dome.
16:02Fuck.
16:02Everything's been done.
16:03Every single thing.
16:04Can you take a picture of someone for me?
16:06Oh, sure.
16:07Jimmy.
16:07Oh, hi.
16:09Could I get a photo of you, too?
16:10Yeah, sure.
16:15Oh, my God.
16:16I cannot wait to get home and rip off this microthong.
16:19If it's still there, my fat ass is eating it up.
16:22Okay, Beth, I think I need to clear the air, all right?
16:25I've clearly misled you, and we need to keep things professional,
16:28because I'm just not in a place for a relationship right now.
16:30I'm married, so.
16:32I know, and I can't do the open thing, all right?
16:34It's just not for me.
16:35I'm not stigmatizing it.
16:36It's just, I wouldn't be a good third, you know?
16:38My needs are too big.
16:39Yeah, I'm not open, and I'm not interested in you like that, so.
16:45Oh, well, well, good.
16:47I mean, or I guess not good, but I just, I'm sorry.
16:50Oh, my God, this is a little bit inappropriate.
16:52I'm like, ooh.
16:53Okay, oh, I'm sorry.
16:54I just was picking up a vibe.
16:55You know, you're being, like, incredibly nice, and.
16:57It's kind of my job to be incredibly nice, you know?
17:01Well, sure, but your job is really to coordinate events
17:04that preserve television history, right?
17:05You don't have to be that nice.
17:06You could just be cordial, or you could be rude even, you know?
17:10We'll certainly keep that in mind moving forward.
17:12Not a problem.
17:14Okay, great.
17:14Well, I'm glad we talked.
17:16Me too, and, um, yeah, if you need any coffee,
17:19just help yourself to the craft over there.
17:21I'm not sure if it's been sitting all day, but.
17:24No, Beth, don't, don't do that.
17:26Beth.
17:29Not into you, boss.
17:30I know that.
17:31You told me she was into me.
17:32You two were both, like, she, she's drooling, boss, you said?
17:35We were sniffing each other like rats.
17:37Uh, what is this compulsive me for honesty?
17:40I didn't think you were gonna say anything.
17:41That was so weird.
17:42Oh, my God!
18:01Thank you, thank you so much.
18:04Wow, um, thank you to the network, everyone who supported the show and gave us a chance.
18:08Thank you to Debra Vance.
18:10Debra, I love you.
18:11Thank you to my entire team at William & Morris, Sheila.
18:14Ladies and gentlemen, welcome, welcome.
18:18We are so proud to be celebrating the 50th anniversary of the groundbreaking sitcom,
18:23Who's Making Dinner.
18:28We are so lucky to have so many writers and cast here today, especially the incomparable Debra Vance.
18:42Hope you're all enjoying the exhibition.
18:45I want to take a moment to thank our partner brands.
18:47The arts would be nothing without you.
18:49Okay, before we get to our screening, we have a special announcement.
18:55As of today, stage 15 on the Warner Brothers lot, where every episode of Who's Making Dinner was filmed
19:02in front of a live audience, in addition to the many iconic game shows that Frank went on to produce,
19:08will be officially renamed the Frank Vance Stage.
19:16Frank Vance will forever be enshrined in Hollywood history.
19:21Well, please enjoy more past apps courtesy of TJ Maxx and Duolingo, and we will see you shortly in the
19:26theater.
19:28I can't believe this. He's upstaging me even from beyond the grave.
19:33I don't think he's upstaging you.
19:35They are literally putting him up on a stage.
19:39Here.
19:43Hey.
19:45I want to introduce the screening. If Frank's allowed to speak, then I want to speak too.
19:48I get that, but you definitely can't. They're live streaming it.
19:52Then get them to turn off the stream.
19:54I thought you said you had a contact here.
19:57Uh, if the people aren't on the right marks, then we're fucked.
20:01So if you could just make sure that doesn't happen, that would be wonderful.
20:03Excuse me, Beth.
20:06Hello.
20:07Hmm. Okay. Um, you mind if I ask you a really quick favor?
20:10Well, I wouldn't want to give you the wrong impression, right? And do any special favors for you.
20:15And I appreciate that. I respect that. Uh, it's actually, you know what? It's not for me.
20:18It's for Debra Vance. Debra would like to speak, introduce the screening,
20:22and she's legally prohibited from doing that. So if you could just
20:25turn off the live stream camera, just briefly, just, just while she's up there.
20:28Mmm. Can't do that.
20:30Please, please. I am begging you.
20:32The answer's no.
20:34See? This is why I don't get into romantic relationships with work colleagues.
20:37We were not in a romantic relationship, so...
20:39Beth, I don't have time to get into our history and relitigate this.
20:41All right? We both know what happened. Can you just please do it?
20:45No.
20:46Fuck!
20:50You know what? When you were dating Jimmy, I really thought we could be friends.
20:55But now I know you're just another selfish blonde, aren't you?
20:59You're a bitch.
21:03Jimmy!
21:05Stop. Stop looking at that. I know I'm not on the list.
21:08I'm just gonna speak for a second. It's okay. It's okay. Tell them Debra Vance said it was okay.
21:11It's okay. Debra, wait, wait. I tried, but they won't turn the cameras off. I'm sorry.
21:17Look, even if I look because people don't see it, as we've experienced, someone could just leak it anyway.
21:21I really don't think you should do this.
21:22I'm not just doing this for me. I'm doing this for all women who've been silenced.
21:31How?
21:32Thank you. Thank you all so much for coming tonight.
21:35You know, we may not have figured out who's making dinner, but we figured out who's getting all the credit.
21:39Frank Vance.
21:42Oh, no, I know. That's not fair.
21:45What is going on?
21:45I tried to stop you, but I couldn't.
21:48Frank gave me a lot of credit. In fact, he gave me solo credit for that house fire.
21:52You remember that one, y'all? Hmm?
21:55Y'all's back.
21:57The only woman who knows fire better than I do is my sister in the struggle, Joan of Arc.
22:02I was told not to speak tonight, but at least Joan got to scream when she was burned at the
22:06stake.
22:08Lucky bitch.
22:12Did I ever mention, did I ever mention that Frank's family had slaves?
22:19Nasty stuff.
22:24Okay, let's roll that clip.
22:35Deborah, stop sulking. They won't let you get a credit card. You can just use mine.
22:39No, I'm gonna tell them I'm...
22:44Mr. Danny Vanceatore.
22:49Well, that's funny. I always thought I'd be the one who's water broke.
22:52Deborah, why are you dressed like a man?
22:55Well, if the bank won't let a woman open a credit card because it doesn't see me as a full
22:58person.
22:59You're going to force them?
23:00How about that?
23:01Not even five minutes being a man and already I'm forcing people against their will.
23:06Yeah, this was today. You need four roommates to afford this house.
23:10You remember roommates?
23:11No, I actually have roommates. I have to live alone because I have bathroom stuff.
23:16Is that an idea for a show?
23:18Bathroom stuff? Like someone who lives alone? No, it's sad.
23:20No, it's something based on this where like, I don't know, where like their grandkid inherits
23:27this house and then has a bunch of roommates. It's about like chosen family and that sort of thing.
23:32You know, reboots are really sellable. Existing IP is very, very good.
23:37It could actually be about something, you know? They could be grappling with the fact that like
23:40our generation is like never going to find the success that our parents found. But like,
23:44what does that success mean? And like, how do we redefine it? You know what I mean? Like,
23:48community building, like downward mobility. Yeah, but funny. Yeah. I think that's really good.
23:53I think if you can do a reboot that's about something, that could be excellent. You should
23:57definitely flesh it out and pitch it to Jessica. Debra doesn't have the rights though. That's okay.
24:02I'll look into it. Okay. Okay. I like that. I think it's good. So do you need something,
24:08Gino? I got myself in a mess. Oh, okay.
24:14Frank, thank you so much for sitting with us.
24:22What do you think made Who's Making Dinner such a groundbreaking show?
24:27Well, you know, we weren't trying to be groundbreaking. We were making a show about our relationship.
24:37And the only reason people even paid attention to it was because it was funny.
24:43And you two had never worked in TV before. So how did you know that what you were making was
24:47funny?
24:49Because of Debra.
24:53Debra was the funny one.
24:59She was always the funniest person in any room.
25:11And as you transitioned into producing game shows, what was your inspiration for...
25:32Hey.
25:36You okay?
25:39No.
25:41Yeah. Because he bombed super hard.
25:44It was rough.
25:49That's what Frank said.
25:53But he said you were the funny one. I feel like that would be nice to hear, no?
25:57It was. That's the problem.
26:04It's been... It's been 50 fucking years.
26:08Why do I still need to hear that?
26:12Why should I care about what some kid who I met when I was 18 years old thinks about me?
26:18It's pathetic.
26:22Yeah. I mean, I get that.
26:26Sometimes there's just one person we want to impress.
26:35I have to ask, what was the mess that Gina was getting into in that episode?
26:44Is there chaos?
26:45Did hijinks ensue?
26:47We didn't get to find out.
26:48I'll tell you in the car.
27:00Oh my god. I always want to be like, you don't have to run. There's no rush.
27:04I like it when they run.
27:07Debra Vance.
27:08Yes?
27:09I've got to call you Violet of the restraining order tonight.
27:12I need you to come with us.
27:13Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
27:15Nope.
27:15You're actually going to arrest me?
27:17Yep.
27:17I'm sorry. She wasn't even funny tonight. That was barely even comedy.
27:21Let's go.
27:22No!
27:23Yes.
27:23No!
27:24Do you know where I keep my bail cash?
27:27Yeah, in Vegas. It's underneath the bathroom sink.
27:29But where is it in LA?
27:31Debra, where is it in LA?
27:32Hey! Call Josefina! Watch the hair!
27:37What?
27:38Fuck, shit!
27:40You!
27:41Millie!
27:42Pick up the paint!
27:52What are you in for?
27:55Stand-up comedy.
27:57You?
27:59Shoplifting from Macy's.
28:02Oh, that's really wrong.
28:04If you're going to shoplift, make a name in Marcus.
28:13What are you in for?
28:15I, uh, I got a DUI.
28:17Oh, honey, I'm going to get you an Uber account.
28:21Or at least a pair of rollerblades. Jesus!
28:27You know, it's not my first time in jail.
28:28I mean, I, uh, was in actor jail once.
28:31I did a lifetime movie called A Prayer for Mommy's Slippers.
28:35I was guilty for not running when I heard the title.
28:46Hi, I'm Amber Debra Vance.
28:50Is that enough?
28:52That's right. That's right.
28:53I've been cuffed before.
28:54But it usually involves some boundaries and a safe word.
28:58Oh, she now is so afraid.
29:01Debra Vance.
29:03Made bail.
29:04Oh, that's my time.
29:10Oh, hey, can I bail out my friends here?
29:12You got the cash.
29:13All right, what do you, what do you need?
29:14What do you need?
29:15500 for me!
29:158,000!
29:1620,000!
29:17Damn, what did you do?
29:19I punched a police horse.
29:21Oh, Jesus.
29:22Come on, let's go!
29:27So how was it in there? Was it bad?
29:29It was amazing.
29:32Really?
29:33Frank was right.
29:34Don't walk.
29:35The only reason that people paid attention to who's making dinner is because it was funny.
29:39But that's what I need to be focusing on with my garden show.
29:42It doesn't need to be important. It just, it just needs to be funny.
29:47Yeah, I mean, I feel like I said that, but then a man said it louder, but it's okay.
29:53I'll just repress it and make me funnier in the long run.
29:55I'm sorry I didn't listen. I have just been consumed by my anger. I didn't see the forest for
30:03the trees. I mean, what people are going to remember is if I made them laugh.
30:09Yes, exactly what I was saying. Love.
30:11Yep.
30:12Great.
30:13Yeah.
30:14Hey, who's hungry?
30:16Okay, let's go to Norm's. I want to try out more material.
30:20Okay.
30:22Yeah, it's been a real pleasure sharing an open toilet with you ladies.
30:26But Bethany, I'm a little concerned about the color of your peep.
30:29I know.
30:30Oh, God!
30:31Yeah!
30:32Whoo!
30:42Whoo!
30:54Hey!
30:57Yeah!
31:00Yeah!
31:14Everybody sing it
31:16My brother in my heart
31:18For a judge
31:19My brother in my heart
31:23For a judge
31:26On the band
31:28On the band
31:31I could have hit my heart
31:34For a judge
31:37On the band
31:38On the band
31:39I could have hit my heart
31:44For a judge
31:45For a judge
31:47Everybody sing it
31:48I could have hit my heart
31:50For a judge
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