The Truth About False Allegations! Twitter/X Space

Stefan Molyneux

Philosopher Stefan Molyneux lays out the truth about false allegations in this 5 June 2026 Friday Night Live X Space, showing how women and groups weaponize rape claims for social power, conformity, and punishment while real victims get ignored and justice takes a back seat. He pushes standing on facts over easy alliances so conscience can beat the fear that lets lies spread.  0:00:00 Viral Tweet Controversy  0:04:05 A Young Roommate Story  0:11:45 Police or Silence?  0:18:02 False Accusations and Risk  0:29:05 Dating, Danger, and Caution  0:42:15 Why Women Choose Bad Boys  0:47:44 Female Choice Shapes Men  1:00:06 The Cost of Confronting Lies  1:08:55 Why Groups Protect Liars  1:20:50 Power Replaces Love   GET FREEDOMAIN MERCH! https://shop.freedomain.com/  SUBSCRIBE TO ME ON X! https://x.com/StefanMolyneux  Follow me on Youtube! https://www.youtube.com/@freedomain1  GET MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING', THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI, AND THE FULL AUDIOBOOK! https://peacefulparenting.com/  Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!  Subscribers get 12 HOURS on the "Truth About the French Revolution," multiple interactive multi-lingual philosophy AIs trained on thousands of hours of my material - as well as AIs for Real-Time Relationships, Bitcoin, Peaceful Parenting, and Call-In Shows!  You also receive private livestreams, HUNDREDS of exclusive premium shows, early release podcasts, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!  See you soon! https://freedomain.locals.com/support/promo/FREEDOMAIN2026

Transcript

00:00:00Hello, hello, everybody. Good evening, good evening. I hope you're doing well.

00:00:07Ste, Van Molyneux from FreedomAid, freedomain.com slash donate to help out the show would very,

00:00:13very deeply, humbly, and gratefully be appreciated. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

00:00:22So, big tweet, big, big tweet this week. And there's a lot to say about it.

00:00:30A lot of which will be difficult, uncomfortable, and controversial. So, get ready for that,

00:00:37because it's happening. And, of course, I'd love to get your thoughts about it shortly.

00:00:45But let's talk about the tweet that has gone well north of 50 million views and counting.

00:00:57And then we'll talk about why it's controversial, and we will talk about, I think, or at least

00:01:02what I think it means. And, of course, I'd love to hear what you think it means.

00:01:09So, the tweet, in a nutshell, is a still from the movie Obsession. It's a sort of horror movie

00:01:20that's come out relatively recently. And it's an offended, upset, and enraged woman.

00:01:28And the tweet is, roughly, I can't remember it, how your girlfriend looks at you when you suggest

00:01:36or tell her to block the man who, quote, raped her in 2019.

00:01:47Boom! And they're away to the races. And this cuts right to the heart of some seriously thorny

00:01:56sexual politics. And it has absolutely hit the roof and outraged, I mean, of course, not all women,

00:02:09not all women, but it has certainly done its outrage work on a fairly significant number of women.

00:02:22And, of course, some women are saying, well, you know, I need to reclaim my power. I need to see

00:02:29him again.

00:02:30Some, a few women are even saying, well, I need to have sex with him on my own terms and

00:02:34reclaim my narrative

00:02:36and things like that. But it really is a wild phenomenon to see.

00:02:47Just a reminder, an outraged woman, and the text is something like,

00:02:52how your girlfriend reacts when you suggest she actually block the man who, quote, raped her in 2019.

00:03:03And some of the women are, how dare men make fun of rape? Nobody's making fun of that.

00:03:10It's a horrible, evil, ugly, vicious, immoral action.

00:03:17So nobody's making fun of that. But what's really going on here?

00:03:22Why are the women so upset? And why are the men so concerned?

00:03:27Now, I've never had any particular experience with a girlfriend who has some sort of open communication

00:03:35or access to a man she claimed, and I'm just going to say assaulted.

00:03:43It's such an ugly word. I don't even like it passing my lips.

00:03:48The grape, the grape.

00:03:52So I've never directly known a woman who has had any kind of contact.

00:03:58I mean, I've known very few women who've ever claimed to have been assaulted in this way as adults.

00:04:05But I will tell you about a woman I met when I was 19.

00:04:13So when I was 19, I spent, after high school, 18, 19, I spent about a year and a half

00:04:20working up in northern Ontario as a gold banner and prospector, claim staker, and so on.

00:04:25And I would work sort of three months on, and then I would have a month off.

00:04:30And the reason for that was that I worked seven days a week, and I would accumulate all of these

00:04:34days off.

00:04:36And then I would have to take them, so then I would come back.

00:04:40Now, the place that I stayed, there was a roommate situation.

00:04:45So I basically just slept on some couch cushions on the floor.

00:04:49I needed a place to stay, and I won't sort of get into the details of the living arrangement.

00:04:55It's not particularly important.

00:04:56Actually, not even remotely important.

00:04:58But I would sort of sleep on these couches, couch cushions on the floor.

00:05:02And there were two other men living in the place, and one of them I'll call Bob, not his real

00:05:10name.

00:05:11And his girlfriend I will call Sarah, not her real name.

00:05:15So Bob and Sarah were kind of an awkward couple to be around.

00:05:20You know, it's always tough when you have roommates, and you have to kind of figure out how the girlfriend

00:05:25situation works.

00:05:27Is she over all the time?

00:05:28Is she eating food?

00:05:30Is she got stuff in the bathroom?

00:05:33I mean, it's complicated because, you know, you have a roommate,

00:05:37and if your roommate has a girlfriend and she's over a lot,

00:05:40then it gets kind of complicated and kind of messy, right?

00:05:44So Bob and Sarah, Sarah was over a lot.

00:05:48And, of course, Sarah had a dysfunctional home life, so she was over a lot.

00:05:53And I don't know if you've ever had this situation, but man alive, it's uncomfortable.

00:05:58I've had it once or twice where your roommates are having sex,

00:06:08like some combination of the Beijing opera being tortured in the dying cat parade from friends,

00:06:14and it's just catawalling and screeching and screaming and crying out to at least 8,000 of the 10,000

00:06:22gods that people believe in,

00:06:23and it's kind of awkward.

00:06:25And it seems kind of weird and performative and not sensitive to, I don't know,

00:06:32the propriety of the situation, the sensitivities and sensibilities of other people in the living space and so on.

00:06:42And when you have sort of a hypersexual and very loud couple, I mean, you just leave.

00:06:50I remember pacing the streets at, you know, one in the morning, two in the morning in the snow,

00:06:55because it's just like I'd rather be anywhere but there, right?

00:07:01And Sarah, the girlfriend, was a feminist and made no bones about it.

00:07:08And, you know, I don't, a lot of people are just like, feminism, evil, evil.

00:07:12I view it all as coming down to political power.

00:07:15I don't really blame the feminists.

00:07:16I don't really blame anyone in particular.

00:07:19If there's a ring of power, people are going to pick it up.

00:07:21And if you water bomb $100 bills in a poor section of town, people are going to scoop up those

00:07:29dollar bills.

00:07:30It doesn't make them thieves.

00:07:31It just means that there's a weird, bad, strange situation going on and people are going to take advantage of

00:07:37it.

00:07:37I don't view feminists as a problem.

00:07:40The only problem is political power.

00:07:42You know, that old statement that most people are trimming the leaves of the tree of evil.

00:07:50Very few are striking at the root.

00:07:51The root is political power and the root of political power is child abuse, as I've sort of talked about

00:07:55for many, many decades now.

00:07:59More than two decades publicly and before that, privately, semi-privately in universities and so on.

00:08:05So she was a feminist and we would have interesting conversations.

00:08:11She was a fast talker.

00:08:13And I'm always a little bit suspicious of fast talkers, especially if they don't ask people questions.

00:08:17So Sarah, one night, one of the roommates was a foolish spender, to put it mildly.

00:08:36And he had bought this big, giant marble table that had a big crack running down one side.

00:08:45And nobody wanted to sit on that one side in case the marble table came down and either neutered you

00:08:51or sheared your legs off at the knees.

00:08:55And it was just one of these foolish purchases that, hey, it's on sale.

00:09:00It's like, yes.

00:09:02And the money you save from buying this cracked dust marble table worth weighing 4,000 pounds, whatever money you

00:09:11save from buying this cracked marble table, you will have to spend on prosthetics to replace your legs when they

00:09:16get sheared off when it cracks and breaks.

00:09:20So every time you have a dinner party, people would only sit on one side at the table.

00:09:24And this is the kind of thing, like, if it had broken in this apartment, in this apartment building, this

00:09:30was on the fifth floor.

00:09:31I mean, it would have gone at least two to three floors down before stopping.

00:09:37It would be like dropping a giant piece of heated metal through several layers of ice.

00:09:45So we're all sitting on one side.

00:09:47And Sarah is talking about feminism, and I can't honestly remember.

00:09:51It's been a long time now.

00:09:52It's been 40 years.

00:09:53I can't remember how the subject came up.

00:09:56But she talked about how she had been assaulted in this way.

00:10:02And she talked about, you know, it was a guy she knew, and she had no idea.

00:10:07And, you know, I mean, there were confounding factors, a little bit of alcohol really late at night, a kind

00:10:15of sleepover that turned more sinister and so on.

00:10:19And she said that she was assaulted in this kind of way.

00:10:28And as a young whippersnapper, less than half a decade into the study of philosophy, I mean, I had some

00:10:34questions.

00:10:36Because, of course, the men and the women were giving her a lot of sympathy.

00:10:40And listen, I mean, obviously, without, goes without saying, if she had been assaulted in this kind of way, then

00:10:48she should receive a great degree of sympathy.

00:10:54Now, if you have been subjected to a significant evil in the world, you now have a responsibility.

00:11:03I mean, we all have a responsibility to fight and oppose evil.

00:11:08Those who have experienced it directly have, in a sense, a greater responsibility because we know exactly what it looks

00:11:14like and exactly how harmful it is.

00:11:18So I ask some questions.

00:11:20I ask some questions.

00:11:23Because I, myself, had been subjected to many years of evil attacks.

00:11:30And even then, I felt a responsibility to talk about the nature of evil and its effects on people so

00:11:37that evil could be combated, opposed, fought, whatever you want to say.

00:11:44And I asked the question that had everyone tense up.

00:11:51You know, when you try and lean a little bit against the Overton window, you stray off the reservation, you

00:11:56go off the dotted, beaten train track paths of acceptable discourse.

00:12:01And I asked, did you go to the police?

00:12:06You know, it's a pretty important question, right?

00:12:10Did you go to the police?

00:12:13It's a very important question.

00:12:15Because she was a feminist, I mean, not just because she was a feminist, but in particular being pro-woman.

00:12:20Because if this man was one of the few percentage points of men capable of this kind of assault, then

00:12:30because you care about women, and I mean, everybody who's got any sense at all cares about women, cares about

00:12:37men, cares about virtue, then you go to the police.

00:12:40Yes, you go to the police.

00:12:43Why?

00:12:44Why do you go to the police?

00:12:47Well, to get the son of a gun locked away.

00:12:52Locked away.

00:12:54And, of course, there was a pause, and she looked at me scathingly and said, well, no.

00:13:00I said, so he's out there roaming around doing this more?

00:13:05I mean, I doubt it was just once.

00:13:07And the hostility.

00:13:09Now, I can understand certain circumstances in which, I mean, obviously, it's far from fun.

00:13:16I mean, it's a horrible experience to go to the police, to lay these charges, to go through a potential

00:13:21trial if it happens, and so on.

00:13:23It's ugly.

00:13:25I get that.

00:13:28But if you're not willing to do difficult things to find evildoers, then I don't know what you're doing in

00:13:37the arena at all.

00:13:38Then don't be a feminist.

00:13:40Don't claim to fight evil, particularly evil, inactive against women, and then not go and get somebody who assaults women

00:13:46in this kind of way.

00:13:47Get his ass thrown in jail where it should be and where it should stay.

00:13:52And she said, you know, the victims are often put on trial.

00:14:00How short was your skirt?

00:14:01Did you contact him again?

00:14:03Were you drunk?

00:14:05Did you say yes to anything?

00:14:07Were there any witnesses?

00:14:08Did you go talk to someone?

00:14:09Did you take photos?

00:14:10Did you go to the hospital?

00:14:12Did you have a kit done?

00:14:18And I said, well, I'm not an expert.

00:14:22Even back then, of course, it's a true thing to say.

00:14:25I'm not an expert.

00:14:27But if there was physical damage, right, physical damage, if you had a torn this or a bruised that,

00:14:41if you had blood and materials under your fingernails because he assaulted you,

00:14:52and, of course, if you have the semen or it can be collected,

00:15:00then, you know, it's not a, again, I'm no lawyer, I'm no expert,

00:15:08but I said it doesn't seem to me to be a super complicated case

00:15:16if you have all of that.

00:15:23I mean, there's a lot of evidence there, right?

00:15:30A lot of evidence.

00:15:33And if you have a lot of evidence, usually there is not much of a trial, right?

00:15:43Again, no expert, but that's my understanding.

00:15:48That's my understanding.

00:15:51I mean, 40 years ago, of course, DNA testing was in its infancy,

00:15:56but you would save this material for when it got stronger or better.

00:16:04But, of course, if you say, hey, I'm going on a date with so-and-so

00:16:08or I'm having dinner with so-and-so,

00:16:10and then, you know, there's physical injury and semen and so on,

00:16:22then you have a case.

00:16:26Because if there's physical damage and black eyes, torn this,

00:16:32then we don't have to get into the details, of course.

00:16:35If there's physical damage and people knew you were on a date

00:16:37and, you know, he was back at your place and so on.

00:16:41And, again, I think it had been relatively recent,

00:16:46so, again, DNA was coming along.

00:16:52You know, you've got paternity immigration disputes,

00:16:551985, this is 1986, and so on.

00:17:01In 1986, some murders were solved with DNA.

00:17:07DNA, it wasn't yet in routine forensic use,

00:17:10but you know it's coming.

00:17:12If you go and talk to the police, they'll say this technology is coming,

00:17:15and even if you can't get them right away,

00:17:19you can store the DNA until such time as you can.

00:17:24Now, listen.

00:17:25Again, the last thing I want to sound is unsympathetic.

00:17:30So, I can understand the reasoning by which a woman

00:17:35might not want to go to the police.

00:17:39I'm not saying I necessarily agree with that.

00:17:42It's hard for me to say as a man,

00:17:44and I've never experienced anything like this.

00:17:46So, again, I say this with all due sensitivity,

00:17:51but I can understand the reasoning.

00:17:54I can't understand the hostility at the question.

00:18:02I can understand being tormented and saying,

00:18:04oh, you know, I wrestled with it.

00:18:07I talked to lawyers.

00:18:08I talked to my family.

00:18:09I talked to my friends, and, you know,

00:18:11they all went over it, and I waited.

00:18:13It torments me that he's still out there,

00:18:16but I decided not to because of X, Y, and Z.

00:18:18Okay, I can see the point of view.

00:18:23But when people just get angry, like, how dare you ask me,

00:18:26did you go to the police to protect women

00:18:31from a guy who assaults people in this kind of way?

00:18:34Why would you get angry at that question?

00:18:39Why would you get angry at the question?

00:18:41It's a logical question.

00:18:45You were attacked by a predator.

00:18:48Did you help society deal with the predator?

00:18:54And I remember that flash of anger.

00:18:57And she said, are you saying I'm lying?

00:18:59Are you saying I'm lying?

00:19:01I'm like, well, okay, that's not...

00:19:04I don't know where that's coming from.

00:19:08Oh, so if it didn't go to the police, it didn't happen?

00:19:10Is that what you're saying?

00:19:11And that's...

00:19:12I don't know if you've had this situation

00:19:17where you're having a conversation with someone,

00:19:19you step a little bit off the dotted lines,

00:19:22and they go, T, F, N, totally freaking nuts.

00:19:26And you're like, okay.

00:19:29I didn't realize I was being thrown off the train

00:19:32at the little stop called Crazy Town.

00:19:36It's a volatility.

00:19:38And then, of course, the woman is upset.

00:19:40The woman is angry.

00:19:42And what do all the white knights on the one side

00:19:45that's not broken or cracked

00:19:47of the retarded marble table?

00:19:49Oh, what are you doing?

00:19:51Don't upset her.

00:19:52Don't get...

00:19:53And, of course, she knows that's going to happen.

00:19:56And so on, right?

00:20:02But, you know,

00:20:07if there is a dog in the neighborhood

00:20:11that keeps biting the children,

00:20:14isn't it kind of important to ask

00:20:17if the dog has been captured and dispatched

00:20:20or taken care of or relocated

00:20:22or whatever they do with dogs

00:20:23that are biting children all the time,

00:20:25put down, whatever, right?

00:20:27Now, of course,

00:20:28I don't know whether it happened or not.

00:20:31And she said,

00:20:32I'm a feminist because I was attacked

00:20:34in this kind of way.

00:20:37And I said,

00:20:37I sympathize,

00:20:39but isn't he...

00:20:41I mean, he's still out there.

00:20:42He's still attacking women,

00:20:43we assume, right?

00:20:44It wasn't a one-time thing.

00:20:46He's still attacking women.

00:20:47And that's...

00:20:48I said, you know,

00:20:49with great sympathy.

00:20:50It's funny, you know.

00:20:52I'm a firm but sympathetic person.

00:20:53I think it's a pretty good combo

00:20:54to be firm but sympathetic.

00:20:56And I said,

00:20:57it's got to be tough for you

00:20:59that he's still out there

00:21:02preying on women.

00:21:04And that is tough.

00:21:06I mean,

00:21:06I don't know how many victims

00:21:08these kinds of predators have

00:21:09over the course of their life,

00:21:10but I'm pretty sure

00:21:12it's not often just one.

00:21:16I'm pretty sure it's not one.

00:21:18These kinds of accusations,

00:21:21obviously,

00:21:22are not always true.

00:21:25This is why we have a process

00:21:26of innocence and guilt,

00:21:29of proof beyond a reasonable doubt,

00:21:31proof 95% plus,

00:21:32why you get to cross-examine

00:21:34your accusers,

00:21:35why you get to examine

00:21:37the evidence,

00:21:37you get to rebut,

00:21:39you get your experts in,

00:21:41trial by jury,

00:21:43because it's tough, man.

00:21:46Accusations of sexual misconduct,

00:21:48particularly if there's no

00:21:49physical damage

00:21:51to the person,

00:21:53to the victim,

00:21:53are very tough.

00:21:54It is a he said,

00:21:56she said situation.

00:21:58And we also know

00:21:59that particularly on the left,

00:22:03accusations of vile sexual misconduct

00:22:06fly pretty freaking fast and furious.

00:22:09just ask Kavanaugh

00:22:13or Trump

00:22:14for that matter.

00:22:17And,

00:22:18again,

00:22:19because of the

00:22:20multi-trillion dollar lucrative

00:22:22power

00:22:23of political authority,

00:22:26people will do

00:22:27and say

00:22:28just about anything

00:22:30to get their hands

00:22:33on that power.

00:22:35and power addicts

00:22:37will do

00:22:38or say

00:22:39just about anything

00:22:41to get their hands

00:22:44on the bloody crack

00:22:45of political power.

00:22:47So we know,

00:22:48we know,

00:22:48these things

00:22:49are weaponized.

00:22:52We also know,

00:22:53and again,

00:22:54this is completely detached

00:22:55from reality.

00:22:56I get all of that.

00:22:57But we also know

00:22:59that women's fantasies,

00:23:01what they report

00:23:02as their fantasies

00:23:04have,

00:23:06well,

00:23:06you can look it up yourself,

00:23:07let's just say

00:23:08there's a significant amount

00:23:10of pretty macabre

00:23:12directions

00:23:13women's fantasies go in.

00:23:15We also know

00:23:17that the

00:23:18believe all women

00:23:23hashtag

00:23:24or approach

00:23:25is designed

00:23:26to more easily

00:23:27weaponize

00:23:28women's accusations

00:23:29against the enemies

00:23:30of those who

00:23:31thirst after

00:23:31political power.

00:23:33Men and women

00:23:36alone

00:23:36in a room

00:23:38with no

00:23:38physical evidence

00:23:39of this kind

00:23:41of evil

00:23:42egregious assault

00:23:44is he said,

00:23:45she said,

00:23:46and it cannot rise

00:23:48past the burden

00:23:49of proof

00:23:49beyond a reasonable doubt.

00:23:50It can't.

00:23:51It just can't.

00:23:54It's like the women

00:23:55who say,

00:23:56oh,

00:23:56I ended up

00:23:56in some guy's bed

00:23:57and I was roofied.

00:24:00Okay,

00:24:00maybe,

00:24:01maybe,

00:24:02it seems kind of rare

00:24:02and there was a study

00:24:03not too long ago

00:24:04that examined

00:24:06a bunch of women's

00:24:07claims who had been

00:24:08roofied and had

00:24:08had blood tests

00:24:09and there was no

00:24:11date rape drugs

00:24:12in their system

00:24:13at all.

00:24:14You know,

00:24:14maybe it's a combination

00:24:15of being 110 pounds,

00:24:17taking a handful

00:24:19of SSRIs

00:24:19and drinking alcohol.

00:24:20I don't know.

00:24:23so if a woman

00:24:25and a man

00:24:25end up in bed

00:24:27together

00:24:27and the woman

00:24:28claims that

00:24:29something bad

00:24:30happened

00:24:32and he says

00:24:33it's not

00:24:34bad

00:24:34and there's no

00:24:35physical injury,

00:24:37what can you do?

00:24:39What can you do?

00:24:41They say,

00:24:42well,

00:24:42women would never

00:24:42lie.

00:24:43It's like,

00:24:43of course they would.

00:24:45Of course they would.

00:24:46I'm not saying

00:24:47women lie more

00:24:48than men,

00:24:49although there is

00:24:50makeup,

00:24:51but it's at least

00:24:52the same

00:24:53and if lying

00:24:54is a manipulation

00:24:55of the less

00:24:55physically strong

00:24:56then women may

00:24:57have a tendency

00:24:58to lie more.

00:24:59Women,

00:25:00of course,

00:25:01caught with another

00:25:01man

00:25:02or caught

00:25:03having an affair

00:25:05or having sex

00:25:05or being with

00:25:06another man

00:25:07can sometimes

00:25:07claim this kind

00:25:09of egregious

00:25:10behavior

00:25:10as a way of

00:25:11saving their marriage,

00:25:12their relationship

00:25:13with their children,

00:25:14their

00:25:16relationship

00:25:16with their

00:25:17boyfriend

00:25:18and so on.

00:25:20I've seen,

00:25:21I really don't

00:25:24want to get into

00:25:25big particular

00:25:26details,

00:25:27doesn't really

00:25:27matter,

00:25:28but I have

00:25:29seen

00:25:31public figures,

00:25:32figures as a

00:25:33whole,

00:25:35I have seen

00:25:36and know for a

00:25:36fact that they're

00:25:37lying and they

00:25:38go out on

00:25:39the internet,

00:25:40look straight at

00:25:41the camera

00:25:41and lie.

00:25:43If you've ever

00:25:44been around

00:25:44somebody who's

00:25:45a really good

00:25:45liar,

00:25:46it's kind

00:25:47of like the

00:25:48Clinton Olympics,

00:25:49you know,

00:25:49the Clintons were

00:25:49past masters

00:25:50of infinite

00:25:52falsehoods and

00:25:54if you've ever

00:25:55been around

00:25:55somebody who's

00:25:56a really

00:25:56convincing and

00:25:57committed liar,

00:25:58somebody who

00:25:59just uses words

00:26:00to get what

00:26:00they want,

00:26:01the way that

00:26:01you use a

00:26:02letter opener

00:26:02to open the

00:26:03mail,

00:26:03it's a sight

00:26:04to be seen.

00:26:07And most

00:26:08people are

00:26:09amoral at

00:26:10best.

00:26:11We know this

00:26:12from the

00:26:12Milgram experiments

00:26:13where people

00:26:14can be ordered

00:26:14to deliver

00:26:15fatal or

00:26:16near fatal

00:26:16shocks to

00:26:18people who

00:26:19are not even

00:26:20ordered to.

00:26:20The experiment

00:26:21requires that you

00:26:22continue and they

00:26:23just continue.

00:26:24Amoral.

00:26:24We saw this

00:26:25under COVID,

00:26:25of course.

00:26:27Most people

00:26:28are amoral and

00:26:29what that means

00:26:29is that most

00:26:30people have

00:26:32no foundational

00:26:33issue at all

00:26:34with lying.

00:26:35Men and

00:26:35women.

00:26:36Men and

00:26:37women.

00:26:38But most

00:26:38people have

00:26:40no moral

00:26:40issue whatsoever

00:26:41with lying.

00:26:43The entire

00:26:44purpose of

00:26:46society up

00:26:46until about

00:26:47eight minutes

00:26:48ago was to

00:26:49make sure that

00:26:50men and women

00:26:50were never

00:26:51going to be in

00:26:51a situation

00:26:52where people

00:26:53would have to

00:26:53try and figure

00:26:54out he said,

00:26:54she said,

00:26:55but no

00:26:55confounding

00:26:56evidence.

00:26:57No physical

00:26:58evidence.

00:27:00No torn this,

00:27:01bruised that,

00:27:02black eyes,

00:27:02whatever,

00:27:03right?

00:27:03The whole

00:27:04point was to

00:27:04prevent this.

00:27:05This is why

00:27:05there were

00:27:06chaperones.

00:27:06This is why

00:27:07a woman had

00:27:08to keep her

00:27:08door open

00:27:10and at least

00:27:10one foot on

00:27:11the floor.

00:27:12This is why

00:27:13there were

00:27:13shotgun weddings.

00:27:16The whole

00:27:17point of

00:27:17society was

00:27:19to prevent

00:27:19situations of

00:27:20he said,

00:27:21she said,

00:27:22because they

00:27:22can't be

00:27:23adjudicated and

00:27:24lives literally

00:27:26are destroyed.

00:27:28This, of course,

00:27:29happens with

00:27:29these campus

00:27:30proceedings,

00:27:31which are,

00:27:33in many

00:27:34jurisdictions

00:27:34and places,

00:27:35absolutely

00:27:35hideous.

00:27:37Absolutely

00:27:37hideous.

00:27:38I mean,

00:27:38if I had a

00:27:39son who was

00:27:39going to

00:27:39university,

00:27:40well, first

00:27:40of all,

00:27:40I'd tell

00:27:41him, unless

00:27:41he had

00:27:41some piece

00:27:42of paper

00:27:42he absolutely

00:27:43needed to

00:27:44get in

00:27:44order to

00:27:45pursue his

00:27:45profession,

00:27:46you know,

00:27:46doctor,

00:27:47lawyer,

00:27:47engineer,

00:27:47whatever,

00:27:48accountant,

00:27:48unless he

00:27:49desperately

00:27:49needed that

00:27:50piece of

00:27:50paper,

00:27:51I would say

00:27:51to him,

00:27:52don't go.

00:27:53I mean,

00:27:53for a variety

00:27:53of reasons,

00:27:54programming,

00:27:56the programming

00:27:57that goes on

00:27:57there,

00:27:58particularly,

00:27:58of course,

00:27:58in the arts

00:28:01and the

00:28:02possibility

00:28:03of a

00:28:04false

00:28:04allegation

00:28:06is not

00:28:06zero.

00:28:08And those

00:28:09things

00:28:10can destroy

00:28:11your life.

00:28:13I mean,

00:28:14arguably,

00:28:15it's at least

00:28:16as bad

00:28:16to go to

00:28:18jail over

00:28:18a false

00:28:18accusation

00:28:19as it is

00:28:20to be

00:28:20assaulted

00:28:20in this

00:28:21evil way

00:28:22to begin

00:28:22with.

00:28:23At least

00:28:23the woman

00:28:25or man

00:28:26who's

00:28:27assaulted

00:28:27in this

00:28:28terrible

00:28:28way

00:28:28gets

00:28:29massive

00:28:29amounts

00:28:29of

00:28:30sympathy,

00:28:30they don't

00:28:31face

00:28:31jail,

00:28:32they don't

00:28:33have legal

00:28:33bills in

00:28:34that way,

00:28:35whereas the

00:28:36person who's

00:28:36accused,

00:28:38their life

00:28:38is destroyed,

00:28:39massive legal

00:28:40bills,

00:28:41if they go

00:28:41to jail,

00:28:42they're probably

00:28:42going to get

00:28:42assaulted in

00:28:43that way

00:28:44anyway,

00:28:45more than

00:28:46once.

00:28:47So we

00:28:48got to be

00:28:48careful about

00:28:49false

00:28:50accusations.

00:28:51Now,

00:28:52the idea,

00:28:53of course,

00:28:54is that you

00:28:54try to

00:28:55design a

00:28:55society

00:28:56where

00:28:58these

00:28:58he-said-she-said

00:29:00situations

00:29:02are least

00:29:02likely to

00:29:03arise,

00:29:04and that

00:29:05means curbing

00:29:06the lusts

00:29:07of the

00:29:07young,

00:29:08because,

00:29:08you know,

00:29:08young people

00:29:10want to have

00:29:10a lot of

00:29:11sex.

00:29:11I got no

00:29:12problem with

00:29:12that,

00:29:13but one of

00:29:13the reasons

00:29:14that young

00:29:14people's

00:29:14lusts were

00:29:15able to

00:29:16be developed

00:29:17to such a

00:29:18significant

00:29:18degree is

00:29:19that the

00:29:20lusts were

00:29:20restrained

00:29:21by the

00:29:22actions of

00:29:22the elders.

00:29:23Now,

00:29:23of course,

00:29:23with the

00:29:24welfare state

00:29:24and so

00:29:25on,

00:29:25the negative

00:29:26consequences

00:29:27of sexual

00:29:28activity have

00:29:28largely been

00:29:29eliminated.

00:29:29You know,

00:29:30in the past,

00:29:30if a woman

00:29:31got pregnant

00:29:32outside a

00:29:32wedlock,

00:29:33the dad

00:29:34often would

00:29:34force the

00:29:35guy to

00:29:36marry her,

00:29:38because otherwise

00:29:39she would be

00:29:40unmarriable,

00:29:41and the parents

00:29:41would have to

00:29:42raise the

00:29:43grandchildren,

00:29:43which is why

00:29:44sometimes they

00:29:45would pass the

00:29:45grandchild off as

00:29:46a whoopsie-late-in-the-game

00:29:48surprise baby

00:29:50to preserve the

00:29:51reputation of

00:29:52the daughter.

00:29:53Now,

00:29:53the welfare state

00:29:54children are no

00:29:55longer liabilities

00:29:56to their assets,

00:29:56which has changed

00:29:57the whole equation

00:29:58and weakened the

00:29:59entire community

00:30:00and familial ties

00:30:01around enforcing

00:30:03any kind of

00:30:03sexually proprietary,

00:30:05any kind of

00:30:06sexual propriety,

00:30:08any kind of

00:30:09sexual standards.

00:30:10I mean,

00:30:11I had this,

00:30:12there's a debate,

00:30:13premium.freedomain.com,

00:30:15there's a pretty

00:30:16ferocious debate

00:30:16I had about

00:30:18abortion and

00:30:19this sort of

00:30:19stuff with a

00:30:21feminist,

00:30:22and I did,

00:30:23of course,

00:30:24point out that

00:30:26the majority

00:30:27of women who

00:30:28are attacked

00:30:29in this evil

00:30:30kind of way

00:30:34know the

00:30:35attackers,

00:30:37which is a

00:30:38wild thing when

00:30:39you think about

00:30:39it, because,

00:30:40you know,

00:30:40everyone thinks

00:30:41some woman gets

00:30:42jumped in the

00:30:43middle of nowhere

00:30:44by some guy

00:30:44she doesn't know.

00:30:46That's relatively

00:30:46uncommon compared

00:30:47to it's some

00:30:49guy she knows.

00:30:50Now, of course,

00:30:51this is not to

00:30:51blame the

00:30:52victims, because

00:30:53this is the

00:30:54question that

00:30:54comes up, and

00:30:55it's an important

00:30:55question.

00:30:56It's an important

00:30:57question.

00:30:58But we tell

00:30:59people to be

00:30:59careful.

00:31:01If you're a

00:31:02man, and

00:31:04you grew up

00:31:05as a boy,

00:31:07sorry, that's a

00:31:08little redundant,

00:31:09so you grew up

00:31:09as a boy, and

00:31:10as a boy,

00:31:12you learn not

00:31:13to trash talk

00:31:14people you

00:31:15don't know.

00:31:16You know,

00:31:16your mama jokes

00:31:17or whatever,

00:31:18right?

00:31:19You don't

00:31:20trash talk people

00:31:21you don't know,

00:31:21boys, you

00:31:22don't know,

00:31:22because you

00:31:23don't know if

00:31:23they can take

00:31:24a joke, you

00:31:24don't know if

00:31:25they're a little

00:31:25nuts, you

00:31:25don't know if

00:31:26they're a little

00:31:26psycho, and

00:31:28they're going to

00:31:28beat the crap

00:31:29out of you

00:31:29because you

00:31:30just said

00:31:30something.

00:31:31You know,

00:31:31when your

00:31:32mama sits

00:31:32around the

00:31:33house, she

00:31:33really sits

00:31:33around, she's

00:31:34so fat, when

00:31:35she sits

00:31:35around the

00:31:35house, she

00:31:35sits around

00:31:36the house,

00:31:37you know what

00:31:37I mean?

00:31:38you don't, I

00:31:40mean, you can

00:31:40trash talk

00:31:40friends you

00:31:41know, you

00:31:43can make

00:31:43little jokes.

00:31:44When I used

00:31:45to play soccer

00:31:46with my friend

00:31:47named Chuck, and

00:31:48I wanted him to

00:31:48pass up field to

00:31:49me, I'd say,

00:31:50up, Chuck!

00:31:51Boy, good to

00:31:52have rescued

00:31:52that.

00:31:55Tremulous joke

00:31:55from the mists

00:31:56of deep time.

00:31:57But as a man,

00:31:59as a boy, you

00:32:01don't trash talk

00:32:02people you don't

00:32:02know, you don't

00:32:03get involved in

00:32:04verbal altercations.

00:32:05You don't call

00:32:06people names, you

00:32:07don't insult their

00:32:08mothers, their

00:32:08girlfriends, their

00:32:09families, their

00:32:09sisters.

00:32:10You don't.

00:32:11Why?

00:32:11Because they

00:32:12could be nuts.

00:32:13It's dangerous.

00:32:15You got free

00:32:16speech.

00:32:17True.

00:32:18You have free

00:32:19speech.

00:32:20You should be

00:32:21able to go into

00:32:21a giant biker

00:32:22bar, go up to

00:32:22the biggest guy

00:32:23inevitably named

00:32:24Tiny, poke him

00:32:25in the chest, and

00:32:27make some horrible

00:32:27joke about his

00:32:28mother.

00:32:28Yeah, it's free

00:32:29speech.

00:32:30But don't.

00:32:32But don't.

00:32:34Because you're

00:32:35probably going to

00:32:35get a knuckle

00:32:37sandwich straight

00:32:38to the choppers.

00:32:39Even though you're

00:32:40in the rights, yes,

00:32:42the giant man named

00:32:43Tiny should not,

00:32:45absolutely not,

00:32:47be beating the

00:32:48brown out of you

00:32:49for making a joke

00:32:51about his mama.

00:32:52Yes, and maybe

00:32:54he'll go to jail,

00:32:54and maybe it is

00:32:55assault, and blah,

00:32:56blah, blah, blah,

00:32:56blah.

00:32:57But every man,

00:32:59every man, come

00:33:00on, we know

00:33:03that if we get

00:33:06the ever-loving

00:33:07sinus bag of

00:33:08snot beaten out

00:33:08of us because

00:33:09we went up to

00:33:10the biggest guy

00:33:10in the bar,

00:33:11poked our finger

00:33:11in his chest,

00:33:13or not even

00:33:13that, maybe

00:33:14that's considered

00:33:14assault, I

00:33:15don't know.

00:33:15We just went

00:33:15up and said

00:33:17something mean

00:33:17about his

00:33:18mama, and

00:33:19then we got

00:33:21our faces

00:33:22rearranged like

00:33:23a Picasso

00:33:23painting, and

00:33:24we said,

00:33:26this is what

00:33:26happened, our

00:33:27friends would

00:33:27say, well,

00:33:28that was stupid,

00:33:29wasn't it?

00:33:29Why the F did

00:33:30you do that?

00:33:31Why would

00:33:32you do that?

00:33:33What, are you

00:33:33crazy?

00:33:34They wouldn't

00:33:35sit there and

00:33:35say, well,

00:33:35you know, you're

00:33:36totally in the

00:33:37right, morally

00:33:38he's in the

00:33:38wrong, that's

00:33:39terrible, and

00:33:40you should keep

00:33:40doing that.

00:33:41No!

00:33:43No, no, no,

00:33:43no, no, no,

00:33:44no, that's not

00:33:44how it rolls in

00:33:45the male world,

00:33:46right?

00:33:48We know.

00:33:49We live under

00:33:50the threat of

00:33:52violence over

00:33:53words.

00:33:54So you learn to

00:33:55moderate, I

00:33:56mean, this used

00:33:56to be duels,

00:33:59duels used to

00:34:00be fought over

00:34:00words, so you

00:34:02learn to

00:34:02moderate.

00:34:03You don't

00:34:03rely on abstract

00:34:04principles.

00:34:05You learn to

00:34:06moderate because

00:34:07there are

00:34:07dangerous people

00:34:08in the world,

00:34:09like 6% of

00:34:09people,

00:34:10sociopaths or

00:34:11psychopaths, and

00:34:13you don't always

00:34:14know.

00:34:15So you walk

00:34:16around the

00:34:17world from

00:34:19time to time

00:34:19biting your

00:34:20tongue because

00:34:21you don't know.

00:34:22You don't know.

00:34:23So you act with

00:34:25caution until you

00:34:26get to know people

00:34:27really well, and

00:34:27then you can make

00:34:28your mama jokes,

00:34:29maybe, right?

00:34:31Maybe you can

00:34:31trash talk them a

00:34:33little.

00:34:34Maybe.

00:34:35But you've got to

00:34:36establish that first.

00:34:37You can't just

00:34:38assume that to be

00:34:39the case.

00:34:40And one of the

00:34:41problems with

00:34:41promiscuity culture

00:34:44is women end up,

00:34:45and men of course

00:34:46do, we're just

00:34:46focusing on the

00:34:47women now, although

00:34:49male assault in

00:34:50this kind of way is

00:34:51also terrible and

00:34:53fairly horribly

00:34:54common, is that

00:34:57women end up in

00:34:59highly vulnerable

00:35:01physical positions

00:35:02with men they

00:35:03don't really know.

00:35:05And yeah, most

00:35:07guys are decent.

00:35:11Not overly good,

00:35:12but not really

00:35:14bad.

00:35:15Decent.

00:35:16Decent-ish, you

00:35:16know.

00:35:17Middle of the

00:35:17bell curve.

00:35:19In the same

00:35:20way that most

00:35:21people, if you

00:35:22walk up to them

00:35:22and make a

00:35:23yo mama joke or

00:35:23whatever, they'll

00:35:25be like, okay,

00:35:26that's a little,

00:35:27that's a bit much,

00:35:28as they would say

00:35:29in England.

00:35:29You know, that's a

00:35:30little, that was

00:35:31uncalled for.

00:35:34Or they'll make a

00:35:34yo mama joke back

00:35:35or something like

00:35:36that.

00:35:37But they're not

00:35:37going to see red

00:35:39go glassy-eyed

00:35:41and beat you until

00:35:42your bones show.

00:35:43But you don't know

00:35:44who.

00:35:45So you don't do it.

00:35:46You don't know

00:35:47who.

00:35:48This is an old

00:35:49argument from

00:35:52feminists that,

00:35:53or maybe it was

00:35:54the anti-feminists,

00:35:54I can't remember,

00:35:55but the argument

00:35:56goes something like

00:35:57this, that if you

00:35:58take your wallet

00:35:58full of cash and

00:35:59you leave it on a

00:36:00park bench in

00:36:00Central Park for

00:36:01the weekend and

00:36:02you come back on

00:36:02Monday, it's going

00:36:03to be gone.

00:36:04It's got to be

00:36:05gone.

00:36:07Now, did the

00:36:08person who

00:36:09steal your wallet

00:36:11do wrong?

00:36:12Yes, they did.

00:36:14Were you wise

00:36:16to leave your

00:36:16wallet?

00:36:17wallet on a

00:36:18park bench in

00:36:19Central Park for

00:36:19the weekend?

00:36:20It's not like

00:36:20it's Tokyo.

00:36:22Tokyo would

00:36:22probably still be

00:36:22there.

00:36:23Tokyo probably

00:36:23would have

00:36:24money added to

00:36:24it.

00:36:25Tokyo would

00:36:25probably be

00:36:25mailed to

00:36:26you or

00:36:26walked over.

00:36:28But not

00:36:28Central Park.

00:36:30And if a

00:36:31friend came to

00:36:31me and said,

00:36:32I left my

00:36:32wallet on a

00:36:34park bench in

00:36:34Central Park over

00:36:35the weekend,

00:36:37and I came back

00:36:37Monday and it was

00:36:38gone, and I'm

00:36:39outraged, I'd be

00:36:39like, you know,

00:36:41I mean, yeah, I

00:36:42mean, I guess the

00:36:43guy, whoever took

00:36:44it was wrong, but

00:36:45come on, I mean,

00:36:47that was dumb.

00:36:48That was dumb.

00:36:50And of course, good

00:36:51men are trying to

00:36:52tell women about

00:36:52evil men, because

00:36:54we know them, we

00:36:55grew up with them.

00:36:57I wrote a whole

00:36:58scene in my novel

00:37:01called The Future,

00:37:02which you should

00:37:03definitely read,

00:37:03freedoman.com

00:37:04books, it's free,

00:37:05the audio book is

00:37:06fantastic in

00:37:06particular, I

00:37:08am a trained

00:37:08actor, so I

00:37:10kind of know what

00:37:11I'm doing around

00:37:11dialogue and

00:37:13storytelling.

00:37:16But yeah, I

00:37:16had a bit of a

00:37:18psycho friend when

00:37:19I was younger.

00:37:21I think it was

00:37:21only one, but he

00:37:24made up for the

00:37:25lack of the

00:37:25others by having

00:37:27extra special

00:37:28Tabasco spicy

00:37:29spinal column

00:37:30psycho stuff.

00:37:33So the world is

00:37:33full of dangerous

00:37:34people, and if

00:37:34you're a hedonist,

00:37:35and if you just

00:37:36want to, you

00:37:36go and have

00:37:37your fun, and

00:37:37get pinned under

00:37:39random guys, it's

00:37:40Russian roulette

00:37:42ladies.

00:37:43It's Russian roulette.

00:37:45And if women had

00:37:46infallible instincts,

00:37:48then they would

00:37:49never get assaulted

00:37:49in this horrible

00:37:50way by men they

00:37:51knew.

00:37:53And I don't

00:37:54know, man, if

00:37:57you're a guy,

00:37:58and listen, I'm

00:37:59sure this happens

00:37:59to girls, and

00:38:01women too, but

00:38:01if you're a guy,

00:38:03every,

00:38:05every man,

00:38:07every man,

00:38:08every man has

00:38:10gone through the

00:38:11process of trying

00:38:14to tell a woman

00:38:16he cares about

00:38:18that she's dating

00:38:21a bad guy.

00:38:23And she will say,

00:38:24he did this, he

00:38:25did that, he called

00:38:27me these names, he

00:38:28yelled in my face,

00:38:29he punched the

00:38:31wall, he threw

00:38:31something, he

00:38:33stomped up to me, I

00:38:34was frightened, he

00:38:36yells, and

00:38:39every man,

00:38:41ladies, talk to

00:38:41men, honestly, this

00:38:42is why it's important

00:38:44to have this

00:38:44conversation.

00:38:45So you talk to

00:38:45men, and every

00:38:48man has had the

00:38:50experience of

00:38:52trying to say to

00:38:53a woman he cares

00:38:54about, doesn't mean

00:38:55that he wants to

00:38:56date her, could be

00:38:57somebody much

00:38:57younger, could be

00:38:59a friend's sister,

00:39:00could be his own

00:39:02sister, cousin, every

00:39:04man has had the

00:39:05experience where

00:39:06a woman is

00:39:08clearly dating a

00:39:09dangerous guy, and

00:39:11he says, you

00:39:13should stop dating

00:39:14him, he's

00:39:17dangerous, it's

00:39:18going to go

00:39:21badly, and

00:39:22what do you get?

00:39:23Tell me your

00:39:24stories, if you

00:39:24want to call in,

00:39:25tell me your

00:39:25stories, what do

00:39:26you get?

00:39:27What do you get?

00:39:29Oh, he's promised

00:39:30a change, he's

00:39:31quit drinking, you

00:39:33know, he was

00:39:33under a lot of

00:39:33stress, he hadn't

00:39:34been to the gym

00:39:35for a while, he

00:39:36was hangry, he

00:39:38didn't mean it, he

00:39:39cried, he's sorry,

00:39:41he's hot, he's

00:39:42tall, he's a

00:39:44finance bro, and

00:39:49look, I mean, it's

00:39:51not like it doesn't

00:39:51happen with guys.

00:39:53She's clearly

00:39:55unstable.

00:39:56Yeah, but she's

00:39:57pretty, so I'm

00:39:58going to date her.

00:39:59All right, good

00:40:02luck.

00:40:02It's like watching

00:40:03Dr.

00:40:04Strangelove go

00:40:04down with the

00:40:05bomb, watching

00:40:06these people date

00:40:08these crazy people.

00:40:11And this is a

00:40:12deep doc aspect.

00:40:14It's opened up by

00:40:15this tweet of

00:40:17female sexuality,

00:40:19which is there are

00:40:20a lot of women who

00:40:22like the bad boys.

00:40:23I'm simply putting

00:40:25this out as an

00:40:26observation.

00:40:29There are a lot

00:40:30of guys who

00:40:31push their

00:40:33penices in the

00:40:34top right of the

00:40:35hot crazy corner

00:40:38and get banged

00:40:39into oblivion like

00:40:41a grenade went

00:40:41off in their

00:40:42pants.

00:40:43It's kind of

00:40:43annoying.

00:40:45Ah, you know, I

00:40:46think we've all

00:40:47slid down that

00:40:49luge tube once or

00:40:51twice in our lives.

00:40:53But trying to

00:40:54talk people out of

00:40:55these terrible

00:40:56decisions is

00:40:57often a kind of

00:40:58fool's quest.

00:40:59So girls like the

00:41:00bad boys, and

00:41:01there's reasons for

00:41:02that, they're

00:41:02evolutionary in

00:41:03nature, in that it

00:41:04was not like all

00:41:06the reproductive

00:41:06choices that women

00:41:07faced in the past

00:41:09were entirely as

00:41:11voluntary as they

00:41:13should be, or

00:41:13perhaps not even

00:41:14particularly voluntary

00:41:15at all, in the

00:41:17same way that men's

00:41:19finances were

00:41:21scooped up by

00:41:22wives and

00:41:22children, and

00:41:24they were drafted

00:41:25in wars, and

00:41:27they were disposable

00:41:27as a whole.

00:41:29I mean, history

00:41:30was brutal to

00:41:31everyone, and

00:41:33given that there

00:41:35was fairly regular

00:41:36conquering of

00:41:38peoples by other

00:41:39peoples, the

00:41:40women who could

00:41:41pivot to an

00:41:43appreciation of an

00:41:44aggressive bad

00:41:45boy, well, sad

00:41:46to say, fact of

00:41:47life, those

00:41:48genes survived.

00:41:50The women who

00:41:51were unable to

00:41:52pivot to the new

00:41:52bad boys, who

00:41:54just took over,

00:41:56well, those

00:41:57genes no

00:41:59survive, senor.

00:42:02They go the

00:42:03way of the

00:42:05dodo.

00:42:06The don't-don't

00:42:07goes the way of

00:42:07the dodo.

00:42:09And we can have

00:42:10sympathy, of course,

00:42:11for all the

00:42:11amoralities and

00:42:12immoralities of

00:42:13history, but

00:42:14that's a fact.

00:42:15So, when

00:42:17this goes

00:42:18viral, and

00:42:19this is crazy

00:42:19viral, like

00:42:20this is why I

00:42:21want to talk

00:42:22about it tonight,

00:42:23it's crazy

00:42:23viral.

00:42:25Are women

00:42:26asking men,

00:42:28asking us,

00:42:30about our

00:42:31experiences?

00:42:33Wow, this has

00:42:34really gone viral.

00:42:35What have you

00:42:35seen?

00:42:36What have you

00:42:36heard?

00:42:37What do you

00:42:37know?

00:42:37What have you

00:42:38experienced?

00:42:39Why is this

00:42:40going viral?

00:42:43Is it too

00:42:43much to ask

00:42:44these days?

00:42:45Or ever, maybe

00:42:46it's too much

00:42:46to ask.

00:42:47For women to

00:42:48say to men,

00:42:49what?

00:42:50I mean, can you

00:42:51imagine this?

00:42:51I got goosebumps

00:42:52on the back of my

00:42:53hand even just

00:42:53thinking about

00:42:54this.

00:42:54Can you

00:42:54imagine women

00:42:58saying to

00:42:59men these

00:43:00days, wow,

00:43:03this has really

00:43:04struck a chord

00:43:05with you?

00:43:07what do you

00:43:08have to teach

00:43:09us?

00:43:10Tell me, oh

00:43:11men, who

00:43:13have slightly

00:43:14different brains,

00:43:15for better or

00:43:16for worse, what

00:43:18do you have to

00:43:20teach us?

00:43:20Why is this

00:43:20going viral?

00:43:22And men, I

00:43:23think, would

00:43:23say that we

00:43:24have kind of a

00:43:25confusion about

00:43:27some aspects of

00:43:29some women's

00:43:29sexuality, which

00:43:32is, why do you

00:43:33keep the bad

00:43:33guy around, but

00:43:35block me every

00:43:36time I mildly

00:43:37annoy you?

00:43:38It's a little

00:43:38confusing, isn't

00:43:39it?

00:43:40It's a little

00:43:40confusing.

00:43:41Again, not all

00:43:42women, obviously,

00:43:45and not all

00:43:46women who've been

00:43:46assaulted in these

00:43:47horrible ways, very

00:43:48few, I would

00:43:49assume, but enough

00:43:50that it's going

00:43:50viral.

00:43:51And, of

00:43:52course, we

00:43:54won't get into

00:43:55this in great

00:43:56detail, I've

00:43:56talked about it

00:43:57before, we

00:43:58also have the

00:43:59enormous challenge

00:44:01of Fifty Shades

00:44:03of Grey.

00:44:05that this

00:44:06novel, highly

00:44:09pronographic

00:44:10novel, where

00:44:12a woman is

00:44:13happy to

00:44:14clash, boom,

00:44:15bang, a

00:44:16victim of

00:44:17severe childhood

00:44:18sexual abuse,

00:44:20and have him

00:44:22assault and

00:44:23beat her

00:44:24because he's

00:44:25rich, has

00:44:26abs, a

00:44:27helicopter, and

00:44:27plays piano,

00:44:29that's, I've

00:44:30got to tell

00:44:30you, this,

00:44:30this, these

00:44:32books, this

00:44:33Twilight fan

00:44:34fiction that

00:44:35spawned a

00:44:36thousand eat-me-beat-me

00:44:37licorice-whip-rooms

00:44:38has landed like

00:44:40an absolute

00:44:42Nagasaki

00:44:42device on

00:44:43male comprehension

00:44:45of female

00:44:46sexuality.

00:44:46And if

00:44:47you've ever

00:44:49known women

00:44:49who are

00:44:50into this

00:44:52prose,

00:44:54levicious

00:44:54stuff, where

00:44:58he's got to

00:44:59be a

00:44:59werewolf, or

00:45:00a vampire, or

00:45:01a minotaur, or

00:45:03an orc, or

00:45:04something big,

00:45:06meaty, manly,

00:45:08muscular,

00:45:09mustachioed, and

00:45:10menacing, it's a

00:45:12little, uh, it's a

00:45:14little confusing,

00:45:15right?

00:45:15It's a little, little

00:45:16baffling.

00:45:17It's a little, what

00:45:19the living hell?

00:45:20Shoe and Head has

00:45:21a good video on

00:45:23Morning Glory

00:45:24Milking Farm, I

00:45:25think that's what

00:45:26it's called, about

00:45:27a woman who

00:45:28gets a job

00:45:30extracting the

00:45:31life essence of

00:45:32minotaurs to pay

00:45:33off her student

00:45:33loans and falls in

00:45:34love with a

00:45:36minotaur.

00:45:38He werewolfed

00:45:39across the room

00:45:39vampirely, holding

00:45:42his giant man

00:45:43meat in one hand

00:45:44and a billion

00:45:45dollars in the

00:45:46other.

00:45:46Oh my god, I

00:45:53mean, many, many

00:45:54years ago, I

00:45:55applied for a job

00:45:56at Harlequin

00:45:56Romances, the

00:45:58semi-smut

00:45:59publishing company,

00:46:00and I read a

00:46:00bunch of these

00:46:01books to prepare

00:46:02for the interview

00:46:02because lord knows

00:46:03I always like to

00:46:04come prepared.

00:46:06And it's a little

00:46:07horrifying, I

00:46:08gotta tell you.

00:46:09It's a little

00:46:10horrifying.

00:46:11And it's confusing.

00:46:14It's confusing.

00:46:15I mean, it's right there.

00:46:17You can read what women like to read.

00:46:19You can read about it.

00:46:20You can sort this on Amazon.

00:46:21It's like, it's not hidden, ladies.

00:46:22We can see it right there.

00:46:25And it's confusing AF.

00:46:30Stated preferences revealed preferences.

00:46:35Stated preferences revealed preferences.

00:46:38You understand, ladies?

00:46:39For a lot of men, you know, it's a little confusing.

00:46:44Men say, I like hot women.

00:46:47Who do they pursue?

00:46:48Hot women.

00:46:49Women say, I like sensitive men.

00:46:51Who do they pursue?

00:46:53Assholes.

00:46:54A lot.

00:46:54Not all.

00:46:55Obviously, not all.

00:46:56I get it.

00:46:57I get it.

00:46:58I knew a woman many years ago who threw all of her standards aside because the guy was 6'5".

00:47:04And, you know, ladies, if you say, listen, I like him tall and empty-headed, fine.

00:47:09Okay, that's then stated preferences and revealed preferences.

00:47:12It's all of this camouflage that I think is causing this tweet to go viral.

00:47:17It's all of this counter-signaling, this I want a man who's sensitive and who's together and is in touch

00:47:24with his emotions and is thoughtful and caring and brings me flowers.

00:47:27And it's like, okay, those are the stated preferences.

00:47:30Who do you respond to?

00:47:33Who do you respond to?

00:47:35So you understand.

00:47:37Kind of confusing for a lot of men.

00:47:39I mean, I think I understand it fairly well.

00:47:41And again, not all women, blah, blah, blah.

00:47:42All right, let's get to your questions and comments.

00:47:45Hello, Stefan.

00:47:46Hey, how's it going?

00:47:48It's going great.

00:47:49It's going great.

00:47:52It's odd talking to you because I've been a listener for such a long period of time.

00:47:57I actually started listening to you when I was 14.

00:48:00So it's been over 10 years now.

00:48:06Anyway, what I originally wanted to call in to ask you another question, but on the topic of what you

00:48:15are discussing in like female sexuality and preferred preferences and whatnot,

00:48:22it was actually something that you brought up several years ago that I really learned a lot from is how

00:48:32oftentimes men are a direct reflection of females' deeper desires in a society.

00:48:41And the way that's really been something that has come up a lot for me in the last few years

00:48:47is recognizing the ways in which a lot of people are pushing back against figures like Andrew Tate and whatnot.

00:48:57But Andrew Tate is a product of female choices.

00:49:01And then you see the feminist element in our society having such an abrasive reaction to him.

00:49:09And he was raised by a single mom.

00:49:12He is like followed by a lot of men that don't have other figures in their life.

00:49:18And it's just curious how that plays into an area like that.

00:49:24Yes, it's a good question.

00:49:26If you could just mute because you're panting and be this dishes being done in the background.

00:49:30I'd appreciate that.

00:49:32So, one of the things that happens in a society that allows women to choose their mates.

00:49:40And in general, I mean, that's the way it's worked for quite some time, at least in the West.

00:49:45There's not really been arranged marriages for a long time, except among the aristocracy who are playing hide the effective

00:49:52gene pool by shuffling cousins back and forth across the continent.

00:49:57But women get to choose.

00:50:00So, a woman who's, you know, reasonably attractive or whatever is going to have, you know, five to ten suitors

00:50:07and she gets to choose.

00:50:10And that's good.

00:50:11That's right.

00:50:12That's how it should be.

00:50:14Now, when women choose their mates, they are choosing the men who survive.

00:50:20They are choosing the men who reproduce, like genetically who survive.

00:50:23And so, in a society where women choose, then male nature, masculinity, is the shadow cast by their choices.

00:50:36So, if women choose selfish, unsympathetic, self-absorbed, aggressive jerks, then since there's some genetic element to just about every

00:50:49aspect of personality,

00:50:51and even if we say that there's not, then the guy who's around to raise the kids is going to

00:50:57imprint his personality upon them.

00:50:59And if he's not around, that's a whole different matter, but that also has a huge effect on a boy's

00:51:05personality to grow up fatherless.

00:51:09So, women define masculinity when women are allowed to choose their mates.

00:51:15Of course, in some countries, women aren't allowed to choose their mates, in which case the men choose masculinity, and

00:51:20so on.

00:51:21But women want the freedom to choose their mates, which, of course, is perfectly moral and right and good.

00:51:27But then women don't get to complain that much about masculinity, because masculinity is defined by their choices.

00:51:36Men have to adapt to women's choices.

00:51:39Men have to do what women want in order to achieve reproductive success.

00:51:45So, women get to pick and choose, which means masculinity is defined by what and who women pick and choose.

00:51:55And the idea that women can now pick and choose and have for hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years,

00:52:00which is quite a long time in terms of genetics, I mean, it only took a couple of hundred years

00:52:05to wipe out most psychopathy, sociopathy, and direct evil in, say, England or other places,

00:52:13which did this 1% to 2% culling of the most violent, either through a prison or through executions

00:52:18or through shipping overseas, taking them out of the gene pool.

00:52:22It only took a couple of hundred years to eliminate the, mostly eliminate this level of evil and predation and

00:52:32so on.

00:52:32So, a couple of hundred years, and it's been, I don't know, when would you say?

00:52:36I mean, hard to say, right?

00:52:37I mean, I guess we could look it up or look back, but it's been hundreds and hundreds of years

00:52:42that women have largely had choices when it comes to who to date and may do.

00:52:49And so, who women choose is what masculinity becomes.

00:52:55So, for women to say, well, we've had centuries and centuries to shape masculinity,

00:52:59we don't like masculinity, again, it's just one of these, it's like a guy who punches holes in the walls

00:53:06and then says, I can't believe there are holes in the walls.

00:53:08It's like, that's kind of the result of your actions.

00:53:11The Andrew Tate phenomenon, of course, is quite interesting.

00:53:13And I, you know, he's been investigated at the yin-yang and they have not, you know,

00:53:19obviously been able to keep him in jail.

00:53:20And so, I assume that the accusations that his sex cam business was kidnapping or coercive or something like that,

00:53:32there's no evidence of that.

00:53:33Otherwise, I'm sure that, you know, the authorities want to get him and they haven't.

00:53:36So, I assume that there's no evidence for that.

00:53:39And it's like the OnlyFans question, right?

00:53:41Which is, of course, the men who pay for OnlyFans are driving the market and that's bad,

00:53:46but there are women who are willing to do it.

00:53:47So, the root of Andrew's, right?

00:53:49The root of Andrew and Tristan Tate's webcam business was, I assume, women who wanted to be in the webcam

00:53:56business.

00:53:57And again, I don't know the details.

00:53:58I just know that he's been investigated at the yin-yang and he's not in prison.

00:54:02I know that there are other charges going on in the UK.

00:54:05I don't really know much about those.

00:54:07But the OnlyFans and sex cam business, to a large degree, it's not, you know, women kidnapped and forced.

00:54:19And so, I mean, the OnlyFans, it's usually a choice from the woman's own home and so on, right?

00:54:23And so, even the Andrew Tate phenomenon has something to do with female choices.

00:54:30And male choices, of course, I get that, but it's very easy for women to make the world and then

00:54:35complain about the world that they made.

00:54:36You know, like, women spend a lot of time saying to men,

00:54:40Oh, it's so creepy when men approach us.

00:54:42I'm just out here trying to have fun with my friends.

00:54:44I just want to have a coffee.

00:54:45Just leave me alone, right?

00:54:46And then the next minute say, it's so weird that men don't approach.

00:54:50Like, there is a little bit of lack of continuity sometimes.

00:54:53And again, not all women and so on.

00:54:56But men see a kind of conformity among women and then they assume that that conformity among women represents the

00:55:05same thing as conformity among men and it doesn't.

00:55:08Men disagree with each other all the time.

00:55:11For a woman to disagree with another woman is to threaten the relationship.

00:55:15Men could disagree.

00:55:15We can even have fistfights and still be friends.

00:55:18Maybe not right away, but over time, right?

00:55:20Men tend to forgive, forget, and move on because men have to hunt game.

00:55:26They have to, you know, put up a barn.

00:55:28They have to build fences.

00:55:29They've got to wage war.

00:55:30So, they can't afford to be permanently estranged from potential allies.

00:55:34So, you have your fights.

00:55:35You shake your hand.

00:55:35You move on.

00:55:36And so, men have a non-conformist culture that you disagree, that you fight, that you oppose.

00:55:44I mean, one of the reasons I'm pretty decent at debating is half my childhood was arguing with my male

00:55:51friends.

00:55:52Death penalty, abortion, free market, socialism, communism, politics, colonialism.

00:55:59And we argued ferociously, and sometimes we'd be kind of pissed off at each other, and then a day or

00:56:04two or three later, we'd be okay.

00:56:07This happens, I would meet twice a week to play baseball and soccer with friends, and we'd try and beat

00:56:14each other, and we'd fight hard, and then we'd go get a pop together and talk about the game.

00:56:21So, for men, the only reason that all men would agree on something is that they all agree on it,

00:56:28because men think that women have as much access to conflict and continuity that men do, and they don't.

00:56:37I mean, talk to women about, you know, their experiences as teenagers, cliques and in groups and out groups, and

00:56:42who's popular and who's not and who's ostracized and, you know, who's working against them.

00:56:46I mean, it's a crazy maze.

00:56:49I remember talking about this when I was writing my novel, The God of Atheists.

00:56:52I needed to understand younger girls, and, you know, I only have a brother, and, of course, I wasn't married

00:56:59back then.

00:57:00So, a bunch of friends of mine, I talked to them and said, hey, you've got a daughter.

00:57:05Can I sit down with you in the room, and I can take a bunch of notes so I can

00:57:07try and understand how this kind of world works?

00:57:09And, oh, my God, the stories that came pouring out were hell on earth.

00:57:13And then she did this, and then this person did this, and then I was out here, and I tried

00:57:16to get into this group, but they only accepted me.

00:57:18But then this person came over and told them about this, like, oh, my, it gives me a headache.

00:57:22The stuff that women have to navigate and negotiate in friendships is crazy, and the conformity requirements are enormous.

00:57:30And so, when women are saying, we don't want men to approach us, and other women are not opposing those

00:57:42women, then men think, oh, all women don't want us to approach.

00:57:45Because if there were women who did want men to approach, they'd say, hey, speak for yourself, sister.

00:57:50I want men to approach.

00:57:51But they can't do that for a variety of evolutionary reasons, scoring very high in trait agreeableness.

00:57:58And it's really, really tough, really tough to disagree in female friendships.

00:58:06I mean, you hear all these stories.

00:58:08This is one of the reasons why political conformity among women tends to be very high.

00:58:11This is why women have gone crazy lefty, because there's women driving it, girls driving it.

00:58:18And then anyone who disagrees is an evil cult Nazi MAGA, blah, blah, blah, and they're out.

00:58:23Men can strenuously, strongly, energetically disagree, and go grab a beer together.

00:58:29And forget about it.

00:58:31It's play fighting.

00:58:33It's not real fighting.

00:58:34I mean, an example of this would be the Christmas Truce of 1914, where men on opposite sides of trenches,

00:58:43or no man's land, sorry, in trenches on opposite sides of no man's land in 1914,

00:58:48there was a ceasefire.

00:58:50And what did the men do?

00:58:51They're literally trying to murder each other on a daily basis.

00:58:54Well, they go out, they share stories, sing Christmas songs together, Christmas carols, trade cigarettes, trade drinks, play soccer.

00:59:02And then the next day, they go back to killing.

00:59:05Women can't even disagree sometimes without trying to slaughter each other socially,

00:59:09and men can literally be shooting at each other one day and then sharing smokes and drinks the next.

00:59:16Male friendships are kind of like, I can't stay mad at you.

00:59:19And female friendships are, oh, I can stay mad at you.

00:59:23And if you've ever known, a friend of mine's sister was going through this when I was a teenager,

00:59:28that some girl in high school had just taken a dislike to her and just relentlessly gunned to get her

00:59:35ostracized from social groups.

00:59:39So when men see women saying, we don't want you to approach us,

00:59:43and they don't see other women fighting with them, they assume that all women believe it.

00:59:47And that, you know, everyone, all the women believe it, but only these most prominent women are saying it.

00:59:51But they all believe it because they're not fighting, they're not disagreeing,

00:59:53they're not at war with each other over the sprint, but they can't.

00:59:57Women have to bite back disagreement all the time in female social circles.

01:00:03But men think it's uniformity of belief among women.

01:00:06Sorry, go ahead.

01:00:07I was just going to say that I, in my dating relationships,

01:00:14I made the intention not to sleep with somebody before I was married to them for a variety of reasons.

01:00:20But one of them was to avoid any issues as far as, you know, like confusion about, you know, accusations,

01:00:29all of that.

01:00:31But I will say with one of my ex-girlfriends, I, when I broke up with her,

01:00:36she was going through a lot of her own personal issues.

01:00:40And I actually entertained it way too long for a lot of reasons.

01:00:45And I've had to go through a lot of growth with that.

01:00:49But the long and short of it is I, we broke up several times before we called it quits.

01:00:54And when I did, she went around and told a lot of people that were in our shared friend group

01:00:59that I broke up with her over text, which just wasn't true.

01:01:04Um, and the interesting thing is I had, um, probably a half dozen of the guys that were in our

01:01:12friend group

01:01:13come up to me and ask what happened there, you know, ask the story.

01:01:19And I didn't have any of the women that were in that friend group come up to me and ask,

01:01:24Hey, so she's saying you broke up with her over the phone.

01:01:27What is that?

01:01:28What is the other side of the story here?

01:01:30Or what's what actually happened.

01:01:32And I think that was so she could preserve her dignity a little bit in the whole thing.

01:01:37But it was just, it was a very interesting to see that.

01:01:40Like, I understand that like a girl isn't going to come up to me right after I broke up with

01:01:44somebody necessarily.

01:01:45But the fact that it was so extreme, the gender gap on that was very curious to me.

01:01:52And do you know why the women didn't ask you for your side of the story?

01:01:56Why is that?

01:01:57Well, because let's say there's a woman named Barb who is a friend of yours and a friend of your

01:02:05ex-girlfriend.

01:02:05And your ex-girlfriend says, Oh, he broke up with me over text.

01:02:08And then Barb comes and says, You know, that doesn't seem really like you.

01:02:11Like, what happened?

01:02:12And if you say, No, no, no, I did it in person.

01:02:14You know, I can tell you we went here.

01:02:16We did this.

01:02:16We talked for two hours and blah, blah, blah.

01:02:19Now, what is Barb going to do with that information?

01:02:22What can she do with that information?

01:02:23Is she going to go back to your ex and say, Hang on a second, you're lying.

01:02:27Like, you shouldn't do that.

01:02:28That's wrong.

01:02:30Like, what happens if Barb goes to your ex-girlfriend and says that, Look, you're spreading these false rumors.

01:02:36Like, he's got proof.

01:02:38Like, let's say you show her a receipt or something like that.

01:02:41Like, or maybe she goes and checks and says, Like, he said you were at this restaurant.

01:02:44He's got this receipt and, you know, this is the stuff you'd like to order.

01:02:48I mean, he said that's when the breakup happened.

01:02:50Like, what happened?

01:02:51What does your ex-girlfriend say to Barb if Barb questions her story?

01:02:55Hmm.

01:02:56Yeah.

01:02:57Well, I don't know.

01:02:59I'm not answering the question.

01:03:00What happens?

01:03:01Well, they stopped having a relationship, probably.

01:03:04Or that the lie is called out, I guess.

01:03:07You know.

01:03:08Oh, no.

01:03:08It's much worse than that.

01:03:09You're looking at it from the male perspective.

01:03:11It's much worse than that.

01:03:14Well, they're, I don't know.

01:03:17If Barb goes back to your ex and says, and let's say that she figures it out and she's

01:03:22got some reasonable proof, she goes back to your ex and says, You've lied about this

01:03:28guy.

01:03:29That's not right.

01:03:31Now, she already knows that your ex is willing to completely destroy people's reputations

01:03:38or try to in order to appear right.

01:03:42Totally.

01:03:43So, if she confronts your ex with the fact that your ex has lied, your ex will now try

01:03:52to destroy Barb's reputation and get her kicked out of the friend group, and she will succeed.

01:03:59Because women in general, and this happens with men too, but we're just talking about women

01:04:03in general in a particular social group will tend to conform to the most aggressive person

01:04:10who's willing to attack the most.

01:04:13So, if Barb goes to your ex and says, You've got to come clean on this.

01:04:19Like, this is really bad.

01:04:20Like, you should not be saying about this guy, this falsehood.

01:04:24Then your ex is now going to destroy Barb and get her kicked out of the friend group, and

01:04:30she will succeed.

01:04:31Like, I'm sorry.

01:04:32The women aren't conformists for nothing.

01:04:34It's serious stuff.

01:04:37So, this is why the women don't come to ask you what your side of the story is.

01:04:41Because if they go back to Barb and say, Well, that wasn't true, or even if they come back

01:04:47and say, I checked with this guy, and that's not what he says, and so, then what your ex

01:04:55is going to say, Oh, you don't believe me?

01:04:56You don't trust me?

01:04:57You're going to go with this guy?

01:04:59You think I'm a liar?

01:05:02Right?

01:05:03Why do you think the same burden is?

01:05:04What is the possible benefit?

01:05:06Sorry, go ahead.

01:05:06What do you think the differential burden on men versus women in that situation is, though?

01:05:13To say, like, let's say, some of the men that asked me, we're good friends with my ex.

01:05:20What's the difference between, you know, the men just having the information, holding on

01:05:24to it, you know, not sharing it?

01:05:26Why wouldn't a woman do that in the same way?

01:05:29Well, okay.

01:05:30What did your friends do with the fact that you did not break up over text?

01:05:35What did they do with that information?

01:05:40Um, I don't know.

01:05:41I think it was for their, their primary, just for their own edification and like clarification

01:05:45of what happened in the situation.

01:05:48And, you know, I think, you know, we're still good friends and we hang out and, you know,

01:05:55meet, but I guess, you know, I don't know.

01:05:59I think they probably just wanted to have a clarity on what happened in the situation,

01:06:03but it didn't really change much beyond like, Hey, is this consistent with the character

01:06:09of person that I would like in my friend group?

01:06:12I don't know.

01:06:13I think that that's why they asked.

01:06:15And I, I honestly took it as a sign of those were truly the friends that cared about me

01:06:20because they were the ones willing to put themselves in an uncomfortable, uncomfortable situation.

01:06:26You know, it's uncomfortable to ask, Hey, did you do this thing?

01:06:29That's slightly shady, you know?

01:06:31Not if you don't do anything about it.

01:06:34I mean, were your male friends in any relationships with the women that your ex had told you broke

01:06:39up over text?

01:06:41Oh yeah.

01:06:42Yeah.

01:06:43Okay.

01:06:43So did they go and tell their girlfriends, Hey, I talked to this guy and he didn't break

01:06:49up over text and I believe him.

01:06:51And he showed me the receipt or whatever it was.

01:06:52Right.

01:06:54Did they go to their girlfriends and say, uh, no, this wasn't what happened.

01:06:59I know for at least one of them, they think that they did, but, um, for most of them,

01:07:06I don't think that they did.

01:07:07Okay.

01:07:08And the one who did what happened?

01:07:10I, I guess I didn't, I wasn't curious enough to follow up on that.

01:07:14Um, in that regard.

01:07:17Interesting.

01:07:17So what do you think, sorry to interrupt, what do you think should have happened?

01:07:21Well, I would have liked to be able to just sit down and meet with her and, you know,

01:07:26clear, clear the air and just say like, Hey, I'm hearing these things from third parties.

01:07:31Um, and you know, that didn't happen.

01:07:34So, you know, let's talk about it.

01:07:37And I actually offered to do that, but I wanted to meet with, you know, her family,

01:07:40family there too.

01:07:41Cause I didn't want to just have one-on-one.

01:07:43Um, she was, it was kind of to the point where I just did not trust her in like a

01:07:50one-on-one

01:07:51setting because she would just, you know, twist everything that we had talked about in the

01:07:56conversation and flip it on me.

01:07:58And it was just, it was a very toxic, but.

01:08:02Okay.

01:08:03That was, have you, have you ever, and this is not a test.

01:08:06I'm just curious.

01:08:07Have you ever gone through the process of trying to root out and expose a liar in a social group?

01:08:16I've done that on like, you know, one-on-one male friendships.

01:08:20I do that a lot.

01:08:21If they, if they say something about, you know, their dating history or they say something

01:08:25about, you know, uh, some accomplishment that they've had and it just doesn't ring true to

01:08:31me, I'll ask them one-on-one, but I guess in a group setting, probably not.

01:08:35Well, I don't necessarily mean in a group setting.

01:08:38Sorry, I was unclear.

01:08:39What I mean is that let's say there's somebody who's just kind of a liar, like they lie a lot.

01:08:45Have you ever tried to remove from a social group, somebody who's a liar?

01:08:53Um, through, through like exposing them to, through the whole, like to confronting the

01:09:00lies that they're expressing and then it doesn't matter how, sorry.

01:09:04It doesn't fundamentally matter how, but have you tried, and I know this sounds like some

01:09:08big challenge, like you should have.

01:09:10I'm just curious if you've gone through the process of trying to extract or remove or get

01:09:17the social group to ostracize somebody who's amoral or immoral.

01:09:22And it could be some guy who lies about his dating history.

01:09:25It could be some woman who lies about her achievements or like, I don't know, somebody who lies and

01:09:30you can't really get them to stop lying.

01:09:32They're just a habitual liar or a pathological liar.

01:09:34Have you ever got, and it could be something other than lying, but have you ever tried

01:09:38to get a group to recognize a highly dysfunctional person and remove them from the group and

01:09:46ostracize them from the group?

01:09:47Have you ever tried to get a group to do that?

01:09:48No, I haven't.

01:09:51Okay.

01:09:52And what, roughly how old are you?

01:09:54Oh, you said 24, right?

01:09:55You're 14 and 10, right?

01:09:57I'm 26, actually.

01:09:5826, okay.

01:10:01All right.

01:10:01So you're 26, so you've been an adult for eight years.

01:10:05And, you know, you might have done that even earlier from sort of 14 or 15 onwards.

01:10:10Have you ever, and you've never gone through the process, and this is not a criticism.

01:10:15I think I understand why, but I just sort of want to point it out.

01:10:18You've not gone through the process of trying to remove a toxic person from a social group.

01:10:25Why do you think you haven't?

01:10:27You care about these things, obviously.

01:10:30Well, if I was just to be an armchair psychologist on this one, like, I would honestly say that

01:10:36it's probably just because I grew up homeschooled, and I also grew up in a very tight-knit community.

01:10:45So, you know, my two best friends from childhood are still my two best friends, and I had a large

01:10:52family.

01:10:53So nearly all of my friends outside of those two friends are family members.

01:11:00So I don't know.

01:11:03That could be a reason, but I'm not very certain.

01:11:06But I know that I haven't.

01:11:07Yeah, you're giving me a little bit of an excuse here, if you don't mind me saying so,

01:11:11because you were talking about your ex and a bunch of friends and the friends who were dating women that

01:11:17your ex influenced.

01:11:18So that's a social group, right?

01:11:21Yes.

01:11:22Right.

01:11:22Yeah, and that's totally separate from that other group.

01:11:27And I guess in that regard, I guess the reason I didn't try to expose her and pursue that is,

01:11:35I guess it felt like gossiping about a conversation that we had had in private.

01:11:40No, it's not gossiping.

01:11:43It's rules enforcement, which is that someone should not lie about you.

01:11:46And it's immoral and wrong and destructive to lie about someone in this kind of way.

01:11:52It's not gossiping, right?

01:11:53It's self-defense.

01:11:55And it's not a criticism, but why do you think you didn't really say to people, listen, she's lying, and

01:12:05that's unacceptable.

01:12:06You should not have liars or someone who's lying in the social group.

01:12:11And we need to sit down and talk about it.

01:12:15And I don't want this person in the social group because she's lying about me, and it's really negative and

01:12:20immoral, right?

01:12:22And you haven't done that.

01:12:25And again, there's not a criticism in any way, shape, or form, but there's a reason why people don't do

01:12:30that.

01:12:32What is that?

01:12:33Because they'll lose.

01:12:36And you knew that you would lose with your friend group.

01:12:38You knew that if you squared off against your ex about this lying thing, you'd be the one kicked out.

01:12:44That if you forced the issue, and you confronted the falsehoods, and you asked people to make a choice, and

01:12:50say, look, she's lying.

01:12:51She's lying.

01:12:52This is wrong.

01:12:53You know, we broke up.

01:12:54That's a shame.

01:12:55But she should not be trying to harm my reputation by saying I did something as cold-blooded and callous

01:12:59as break up with her over text.

01:13:00It's wrong.

01:13:02If you do that, and you square off, you know, the Clint Eastwood style, like dusty western town style.

01:13:13If you square off against someone who's lying about you, and you ask people to choose, what's going to happen?

01:13:25That I would be the one that got kicked out.

01:13:27Yep.

01:13:27She would make sure that you're the one who gets kicked out.

01:13:30She would work the women.

01:13:31She would work the men.

01:13:32Because she's really committed to having the social group and being dominant in the social group.

01:13:36And the reason I know that they would choose her is that's why she lied in the first place.

01:13:42Because if she had known about this group, that if she lies to them, you'll confront her, and they will

01:13:49kick her out.

01:13:49She wouldn't have lied in the first place.

01:13:51So she understands the group better than you do.

01:13:54Because she knows that if she lies, the group will not kick her out.

01:13:59And nobody's even going to talk about it.

01:14:01She gets away with it scot-free.

01:14:03And you know that about the group, too, which is why, and again, this is not a criticism at all.

01:14:07I'm just pointing it out.

01:14:08You know this about the group, which is why you didn't fight it.

01:14:12I did have, this is, what, four years ago now.

01:14:17But I did have several nightmares, you know, after having broken up about, you know, friends of mine coming up

01:14:24to me and telling me, you know, things that I personally feared, you know, that they would say to me.

01:14:29Like, you're a terrible person.

01:14:31And I don't, you know, you know, all the worst things they could say.

01:14:37And I don't know if that was just, I don't know what that was, but I know that it was,

01:14:43it was definitely difficult to go through at the time.

01:14:46Well, that's your unconscious telling you that she runs the group.

01:14:51And if you go up against her, you're out, and she's strengthened.

01:14:56And listen, I don't know if you followed me through the whole deplatforming thing, but this is a big example

01:15:01of this, right?

01:15:02There was me telling honest, moral, factual truths to the world.

01:15:06And then there were people who were getting enraged about it, who were obviously unstable or corrupt or immoral.

01:15:13And society had to choose, right?

01:15:17Between the truth teller, the honorable man, and the manipulative, destructive liars, right?

01:15:25And who did society choose?

01:15:29Yeah.

01:15:32When you go up against the corrupt, they will escalate.

01:15:37I'm not saying 100% of the time, but it's pretty common.

01:15:41It's by far the norm.

01:15:43That if you, and maybe you've had this at work or other places, but if there's somebody who's corrupt, and

01:15:48you go up against them.

01:15:50In the business world, I managed to win about 50% of the time.

01:15:55But in the political world, the social world, the intellectual world, the podcasting world, whatever.

01:16:01I mean, I lost, I won for a while, and then I lost hard.

01:16:06Yeah.

01:16:07And I lost, like, almost everything, right?

01:16:09I mean, as far as the public work goes.

01:16:12Sorry?

01:16:13You lost all of your major platforms and reach that you had.

01:16:16Sure.

01:16:17Arbitrary income and all of that.

01:16:19And so, the people who lied won against the people who tell the truth.

01:16:25And this is, you know, Socrates and Jesus and Galileo, and you sort of go through the list on and

01:16:30on and on.

01:16:32People don't have morals to fall back on.

01:16:34They don't say, well, you know, my friend here, the guy, you, have kind of established to me that this

01:16:40woman was lying.

01:16:42And so, we don't want to have liars in the group.

01:16:46So, we'll certainly talk to her about it.

01:16:47But if she's aggressive or manipulative, man, she's out.

01:16:50I mean, life doesn't work.

01:16:52I wish it did.

01:16:53It works like that in my world, but not in the world as a whole.

01:16:57Your friend group, my friend group in the past will absolutely side with the most aggressive and unstable person.

01:17:06And if you're reasonable and moral, you're toast.

01:17:09Because it's just about appeasing the bad guys.

01:17:12Because the bad guys will make their life difficult in a way that you won't.

01:17:15So, if there's a woman who's willing to lie about you, everyone understands.

01:17:18Oh, she'll be willing to lie about me, too.

01:17:20And she might spread some really dangerous lies.

01:17:24So, people are just doing a cost-benefit calculation and saying, well, you know, boy, she's willing to lie about

01:17:30this about a guy she really claimed to love.

01:17:32I mean, I'm not that close to her.

01:17:33And if she's willing to lie about him, she's willing to lie about me.

01:17:36And if she's willing to lie about me, my life could get seriously complicated and difficult.

01:17:40So, you're out.

01:17:41And she's in.

01:17:42Yeah, and it's interesting because it really allowed, it changed my perspective on human nature.

01:17:50And I know that you've shared these truths about human nature over the last many years.

01:17:56But for just to feel it on an intimate perspective, it allowed me to see that, like, this woman who

01:18:02was, like, wanting me to propose to her to get married, you know, just a couple weeks earlier, went from

01:18:08that to, like, spreading the worst things she really could have said about me.

01:18:13You know, to the whole world.

01:18:15And it's just, that's.

01:18:16Well, no, there could be a lot worse, brother.

01:18:19Well.

01:18:19You could get false allegations.

01:18:20You could get fired at work.

01:18:22She could go to the cops.

01:18:23I mean, there's a lot worse.

01:18:24Unless, I mean, if what I've heard is, you know, she said you broke up over text, which is not

01:18:29nice.

01:18:29But, no, things can get a lot worse.

01:18:32That's so true.

01:18:33Yeah, people just look and say, okay, who's going to make the most trouble for me?

01:18:38Right?

01:18:38So, I assume that the people, I can't read minds, but I assume people in the media and the people

01:18:42on the platforms said, okay, so Steph is a reasonable, non-vengeful, non-psycho guy.

01:18:51So, what's he going to do?

01:18:52Make a PowerPoint proving that I'm wrong?

01:18:55That doesn't do me any harm, right?

01:18:57I mean, whereas these other people, if they don't get me to de-platform Steph, they're going to try and

01:19:05get me fired.

01:19:06Now, Steph's not going to try and get me fired.

01:19:09And, again, I don't know.

01:19:10I mean, this is just my guess.

01:19:11I don't have any proof of it.

01:19:12This is just my guess about how things happen.

01:19:16That people aren't making decisions based on principle.

01:19:19Well, there's a right of free speech, and, you know, he hasn't broken our standards, and blah, blah, blah, blah,

01:19:24blah.

01:19:25What they're doing is they're saying, well, Steph isn't going to make my life difficult.

01:19:31These people who want him banned, they're going to make my life difficult.

01:19:34And, honestly, I think it's the same thing that kind of happened with the Henry Novak situation last December, which

01:19:41I talked about a week ago, which is the police show up.

01:19:45You know, there's a Sikh and a British boy.

01:19:50I think it's a Pakistani Sikh, right?

01:19:53Now, the Pakistani can call the police racist and get the police in trouble.

01:20:00Can the British boy call the police racist and get the police in trouble?

01:20:05No.

01:20:06No.

01:20:07So they're just doing what makes the most sense given the asymmetry of the damage that can be done.

01:20:15So if they don't side with the Pakistani fellow, then he can call them racist, he can lodge a complaint,

01:20:25they're going to be investigated, it's going to take six months, a year, it's going to be tough, and maybe

01:20:30the newspapers will pick up on it.

01:20:31So he can make their life very difficult.

01:20:34Can the white guy do anything like that?

01:20:36Nope.

01:20:38Even when he was stabbed multiple times, he was just bleeding out.

01:20:41They didn't believe him.

01:20:43And it just...

01:20:44Right.

01:20:45Now, if he's bleeding out, he also can't make their life very difficult.

01:20:50I just don't understand.

01:20:52I don't understand how even, you know, even with the level of programming that we receive, like, on a daily

01:20:59basis, that that would overcome just the logical reality that this man is stabbed, that he can't, you know, he

01:21:06can't...

01:21:07Well, they said that the story that they say is that, you know, the blood was filling up his chest

01:21:13cavity.

01:21:13It wasn't particularly evident, and they couldn't tell, and all of that, and, you know, then they say, well, he

01:21:19couldn't have made it anyway, which I don't believe for a moment.

01:21:21I mean, if you know, I mean, if you've got a rupture in your heart vessels and so on, and

01:21:24then they wrench your hand out back, they wrench your hands behind you to handcuff you, that's going to tear

01:21:29things up.

01:21:30And, you know, I mean, he died three minutes or five minutes after being handcuffed.

01:21:34So, again, the facts will come out, or I don't know if the facts will come out, probably not, but

01:21:38they were making a decision based on a cost-benefit calculation, which is what most people do.

01:21:45Most people are just cost-benefit calculation NPCs.

01:21:48They don't have any access to principles or universals or morals or anything like that.

01:21:53They're just like, okay, who in this situation can make my life more difficult, and who in this situation will

01:22:00not make my life more difficult?

01:22:01I will just conform to it, appease with the guy or the woman who's going to make my life more

01:22:07difficult.

01:22:07I will appease them, which is why threats work, which is why escalation works, which is why lying about you

01:22:12works.

01:22:13It worked.

01:22:14It worked.

01:22:15Right?

01:22:16Nobody confronted her.

01:22:17She wasn't kicked out.

01:22:18She got her story across.

01:22:20She attacked your reputation.

01:22:21Now, maybe some people didn't believe her and maybe sided with you, but it didn't cost her anything.

01:22:27She's still in the group.

01:22:28She's still running things, or, you know, if she left, it was of her own accord.

01:22:32I mean, this is what my mother taught me.

01:22:36She understood the world a whole lot better than I did because I'm like, well, geez, you know, I'm surrounded

01:22:41by a bunch of Christians.

01:22:42There are all these morals and so on.

01:22:43So, all that happened was, when I was a kid, is people said, okay, well, geez, Steph's mom's really aggressive

01:22:50and vengeful and violent and kind of crazy.

01:22:52So, if she wants to make my life difficult, boy, she could really do it.

01:22:56I mean, look what she did to her ex-husband, who she loved and had two kids with or claimed

01:23:00to, right?

01:23:01Well, claimed to love, not claimed to have two kids with.

01:23:03I think she did.

01:23:05But they looked at my mother and said, okay, this is an unstable, aggressive woman.

01:23:09So, she could make my life more difficult.

01:23:13Little Steph, well, what's he going to do?

01:23:18He's five.

01:23:19He's six.

01:23:19He's 10.

01:23:20He's 12.

01:23:21He's not going to make my life more difficult.

01:23:23So, they conformed with my mom because she was aggressive.

01:23:27That's why people are aggressive, because it works.

01:23:29And the reason it works is that people don't make decisions based upon morals or ethics.

01:23:34They just make decisions based upon a cost-benefit calculation.

01:23:37And if there's an aggressive person who's willing to lie and break rules, then, yeah, you'll conform to them.

01:23:46Because if they come at you, everyone else will scatter.

01:23:50Did you see what I mean?

01:23:51Oh, totally.

01:23:52Totally.

01:23:53And it's honestly the one that is more willing to, like, almost inflict damage on the other person without regard

01:24:00to themselves or their future that wins in a situation like that.

01:24:06It's not about win-win or having reciprocal relationships at all.

01:24:10It's just like, I can bring more force to bear in this moment, and that makes me the winner.

01:24:16Yeah, people unhampered by a conscience, I mean, they have much less to lose.

01:24:21They have no resistance.

01:24:23They can just do whatever they want.

01:24:25And also, the thing is, too, like, if I were out there in the world acting in a false, lying,

01:24:32dishonorable manner, well, the people in my life who love me would have a big problem with me.

01:24:38Whereas if someone has no conscience and they just do whatever, then nobody loves them, then they're not going to

01:24:44disappoint anyone because nobody loves them, nobody respects them deep down, nobody looks up to them.

01:24:48What does it cost them to be immoral?

01:24:50I mean, if I was out there doing terrible things in the world, my wife would not love me anymore.

01:24:54My child would not love me.

01:24:55My friends would not love me.

01:24:57You know, that's not right.

01:24:58And, of course, my listeners would desert me, and I would hope that they would, right?

01:25:02So, for me, if I go out and do bad things, it's hugely costly for me.

01:25:08If someone who's not loved, who's not moral, who has no conscience, what does it cost them to do bad

01:25:16things?

01:25:16They're not loved anyway, and they gain power, right?

01:25:19Power is what rushes into your life when you're not loved, and it drives out whatever capacity for love you

01:25:24might have.

01:25:26And so, this is why, if you want to know how moral someone is, look at who loves them, and

01:25:31then you'll understand what it might cost them to be immoral.

01:25:34So, sorry, you were going to say?

01:25:35I was just saying, how is that?

01:25:38Can you restate what you said?

01:25:41When love leaves somebody's life, power is what rushes in?

01:25:46Yeah, so, when someone is loved, and love is our emotional response to virtue, if we're virtuous.

01:25:53So, if somebody is loved, then they're loved for their virtues, which means if they're not virtuous, they will not

01:25:59be loved.

01:25:59They lose love, and when you have love, losing it is the worst thing, because love is the best thing,

01:26:06right?

01:26:07So, if someone is loved for their virtues, then they pay a very high price for being immoral.

01:26:14But if somebody is immoral, then nobody can love them, and so, what happens if you're not loved?

01:26:23You still want to have an effect in the world, you still want to, you go for dominance, because love

01:26:28is win-win.

01:26:28When you love someone and they love you back, you're both happy because of it.

01:26:32It's win-win, it's like the free market.

01:26:34But people without a conscience who are amoral or immoral or just dominance or status-based or hierarchy-based,

01:26:42let's climb the hierarchy, it doesn't matter whose faces you step on, those people are not loved.

01:26:47So, what do they get as the consolation prize for not being loved?

01:26:51Power!

01:26:51They get power.

01:26:52They get power.

01:26:53They get an effect in the world.

01:26:55They bully people, and they matter to people because people are scared of them, and instead of love, they get

01:27:00fear and conformity.

01:27:02And that's the sad consolation prize.

01:27:05And so, and the more you pursue dominance and aggression, the less you're loved, therefore, the unhappier you are.

01:27:12Therefore, the more you have to fill up that unhappiness with dominance and aggression and subjugation of others.

01:27:18All right, you still with?

01:27:19Oh, I think we lost it.

01:27:21All right, not the end of the world.

01:27:22Well, listen, guys, thank you so much.

01:27:24Great conversation, great call.

01:27:26Really, really do appreciate it.

01:27:27FreeDomain.com slash donate to help out the show.

01:27:29It would be lovely.

01:27:31I mean, I know everyone's finances are hurting, and the income is hurting a little too, so if it's been

01:27:36a while since you've donated, FreeDomain.com slash donate, I would really appreciate it.

01:27:40Lots of love, my friends.

01:27:41We'll talk soon.

01:27:42Bye.

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