- 12 hours ago
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00:07I'm not afraid to die today, I could've chose somebody else to love
00:18Give me the gun, I'll take the blame And cover up your darker shade of blood
00:30I'll feel the rain, and turn the pain into gold
00:45Hello?
00:53Moby Baba?
01:00Why?
01:54You can tell me if he's here or not you can't keep him you can't keep him unless you charge
01:59him have you charged him like I said I need to know if he's here I've been sat there for
02:03over an
02:04hour now listen someone is going to come and talk to you okay I'll give you ten minutes then I'm
02:09taking your name and number hi I learned to yeah I'd like to report a missing family whole family
02:25that's gonna miss and have they yes I think they've been kidnapped by terrorists but domestic ones
02:33the white ones
02:37Q-U-R-R-A-T hyphen U-L hyphen A-I-N two hyphens okay yeah that's this was
02:46it goes like you
02:48okay I want to go back to the um the bus stop that you said you had with your family
02:52well that's not
02:53really that relevant what um because what I'm saying is if you just hack into this this was set
02:57up in the living room so whatever's taken place will definitely have been recorded on this yeah so
03:02so if we can just get into that so that's a very different kind of investigation much longer process
03:06cyber crime really and this falls under missing persons so all we're trying to do is just help
03:11you find why didn't you report the pig's head when you first got it sorry much just details yeah yeah
03:16of course that that was that's that's different I'm reporting this crime now alleged crime I'm sorry
03:24maybe me a bit paranoid am I am I like a suspect or something like that in this case well
03:29easy now
03:29you know no one said anything about a suspect we just need to ask questions so in order to conduct
03:34a proper investigation so that's why I'm asking why didn't you report the pig's head I thought I
03:40could handle it myself with my private security consultant you got a security consultant because
03:44I'm an actor and I'm in the news sorry you're in the you're in the news yeah I might be
03:49the next
03:49James Bond wait wait wait so you're saying that you're actually like a famous actor I didn't say
03:56famous no I just said well actually yes my bond callback is later on this afternoon but I can't be
04:01there if I'm here and I'm here because my right so so I'm just making sure we've got private security
04:05detail auditioning to be the next James Bond and got sent the seven pigs head by by racist trolls
04:14I did because they don't want me to be the next James Bond right which is why these people have
04:18also abducted your family there's my current working theory you sound completely fucking mental
04:30okay mate um give us a few minutes and we'll be right back
04:42what in the shitting hell are you doing man if you keep your mouth shut then maybe I can focus
04:49focus on this you sentient ballback you should be at home preparing for the audition
04:54shut out and you most certainly should not be here you're not the hero of this story to them
05:00you're the villain trust me they're gonna google me and when they do they're gonna see all the bond
05:05chat and they're gonna see that I'm telling the truth and then they can tell the papers how you
05:09showed up here with a severed pig's head think you turgid gimp think
05:16fuck
05:31oh sorry be cool man police are gonna be watching I don't know I'm just looking for my family that's
05:38not a crime is it hey calm the fuck down I saved you back there all right okay I'm sorry
05:43and thank
05:44you that's more like it all you've got to do is walk normally very weird walk man
05:52be normal
05:53this is normal
06:06whoops a daisy
06:08gently cock fingers okay lock the doors close the curtains let's run lines auditions in eight hours
06:15wait where are you going I need to find the right USB
06:19the only camera that matters is at the screen test
06:24Sha time running out say the words with me
06:30do you want to know what it's like doing the dirty work fighting everyone and being no one I don't
06:39live with
06:40I don't live with myself
06:40I don't know I'm giving you gold here
06:45oh yes
06:46that's right motherfucker
06:47oh this is all the distraction classic self-sabotage
06:54oh shit
06:55come on
07:00fuck
07:01you're not afraid for your family you're afraid of success even if they
07:07have been kidnapped you're no superhero spy becoming one should be our focus
07:14why don't you try helping for a change I am helping the only version of you that
07:19has any value to your family or anyone else is bond shut the fuck up oh god
07:27self is as basic as they come try his birthday obviously oh
07:34oh
07:38you don't even know his birthday some brother you are okay we don't know can we get back to work
07:48the security consultant yeah if you were this obsessive about your craft you'd have a career
08:06this is a security list if you see something that doesn't
08:10you can speak to star or text
08:13this is a waste of time
08:27oh shit
08:28what
08:29uh we've got problem with dogs
08:31oh dear
08:32I'm dry aged you realize
08:34turn around now
08:35can't turn around
08:36he spotted us
08:36at least suspicious
08:37you're a sweaty brown man with a bloodstained duffel bag
08:40you're already fucking suspicious
08:43just shut out okay just have some faith
08:45I'm an actor aren't I
08:47oh god
08:50excuse me sir
08:53I'm not doing anything
08:54I'm not even here to catch a train
08:57oh god
08:59no no
08:59get back
09:00it's mine if it's a tickle
09:01in the bug
09:02damn boy
09:04what's in the bug
09:04stop you fucker
09:07sir
09:07that won't be necessary
09:13yep
09:16did you say something
09:17good man
09:18have a good day
09:22how did you do that
09:23well I've still got a few tricks I must leave when it comes to law enforcement
09:27must be nice to be tall and white huh
09:30membership has its privileges shall we
09:33it's a complete fucking mess
09:35I tried to go to the police
09:36well there's your first mistake there
09:37come on man
09:38we're gonna find your family
09:39alright
09:40okay
09:40okay man it feels good to hear you say that
09:43because nobody believes me
09:44I like him
09:44he makes me feel safe
09:46I'm gonna put a call out
09:47on something called the kilner system
09:48alright
09:49now luckily Wembley is CCTV to the hilt
09:51so if your family have been on any street actually
09:53in London in the last 8 hours
09:55I will be able to track their exact location down to the inch
09:58and as soon as I get a ping
09:59you'll be the first to know
10:01really
10:01yeah man
10:02all good
10:03that's fucking amazing thank you
10:05I didn't realize your company had that kind of reach
10:08my company has the biggest reach there is
10:10alright don't worry
10:11look listen here's the thing right
10:12your family that's today's problem
10:14yeah
10:14what about tomorrow's problem
10:15now do you want to be reactive
10:17or do you want to be proactive
10:19I want to be proactive
10:20of course you fucking do
10:21you are on the precipice of something massive
10:23and all that backlash that you've been experiencing recently
10:26it will only get worse
10:28trust me I know
10:28I've fucked the audition
10:30and my prospects have gone down the toilet
10:32so
10:32listen I wouldn't be here talking to you now
10:35if that was the case
10:37would I
10:39so you've got your recall later
10:41correct
10:43yeah
10:43yeah
10:44so you're going to go in there
10:45you're going to do your audition
10:47and when you do
10:48those decision makers
10:49will be primed
10:50in your favor
10:55what I'm
10:56you understand
10:57how
10:57how
10:58how
10:59how you can do that
11:05are you at my five
11:08it's okay
11:10holy fuck
11:11okay
11:11it's not a big deal
11:12it's not a big deal
11:13okay listen to me
11:15I'm the only call you'll ever need to make
11:18we've got your bag
11:22what
11:24there's a catch isn't it
11:25no
11:26I mean look
11:27every relationship's a two-way street isn't it
11:30so
11:32basically what we're trying to do
11:33is we just want to build bridges
11:36to your community
11:37and in order to do that
11:38we rely on individuals such as yourself
11:40just to help us with messaging
11:42you know as a prominent Muslim
11:44and soon to be
11:45more so your voice
11:46it carries a lot of weight
11:47so
11:48so let's use it
11:50yeah
11:52right
11:53Shah let's cyber
11:54now
11:55just remember we're the good guys
11:57yeah
11:58don't forget that
11:59Shah
12:01obviously
12:02just eat the toilet
12:04I'll be here
12:05I'll be here
12:06I mean that sounds shady as shit
12:13no
12:13Shah I was wrong
12:15going to Nigel was a masterstroke
12:17albeit an accidental one
12:19what are you talking about
12:20he wants me to be a snitch
12:22snitch
12:22he's not asking you to honey trap an ayatollah is he
12:25he's offering you the role of a lifetime
12:27in exchange for some light PR work
12:30I'm going to sell out Fed
12:31sorry
12:32sell out?
12:33well pardon me Nelson missing Mandela
12:35you want to star in a franchise that brazenly sells watches, cars and the British Secret Service
12:42this is the only way you will land this role
12:46I guess I just always thought I was someone who represents us to them
12:52you know I'm not fucking them to us
12:54you're not representing them or us
12:57this is about you Shah
12:59and who you want to be
13:00and put simply
13:01do you want to be talking to a pig's head in a toilet
13:04panicking about your career and your family
13:06or do you want to be the hero of this story
13:09the ultimate shitting hero
13:11because that my friend is what is on the table
13:34I'm improvising
13:37oh god
13:39access
14:09who's out?
14:15watch out
14:35okay
14:37okay
14:37okay
14:38what in Satan's gossip did you just do
14:40we weren't this close
14:43answer me
14:44hello
14:45oh god
14:46more improv
14:47no one's watching you
14:49malodorous
14:50piss flap
14:51what's the problem man?
14:52my problem is that I care about you Shah
14:54I want to make you better
14:56no it's just because you say you're trying to help me
14:58all you do is shit on you
14:59it's tough love
15:00and it's the only voice you understand
15:02if I humiliate you
15:03it's to save you from the bigger humiliation
15:06of remaining as you are
15:08you want to chill out
15:10I'm in control now
15:12and I know where we're going
15:16no no no
15:17please
15:17don't fake hang up on me
15:20you need me
15:44fine I'm willing to try things your way
15:47but if we want to be Bond
15:49why are we at Taliban HQ?
15:51these savage little Ewoks
15:53only hold us back
15:57don't leave me out here
16:18please
16:18congratulations to the Lord
16:19inshaAllah
16:22excuse me
16:23sorry
16:23excuse me
16:25I'm gone
16:25can I have a word please?
16:26Why are you calling me uncle at the same age?
16:29Oh, I mean, no.
16:30Sorry, I'm actually here to look for someone.
16:33Someone who's gone missing, my brother.
16:35Zofi, I think you know him.
16:36He's the big guy who does the cabs.
16:38Have you seen him?
16:39Well, inshallah, we're just about to start praying.
16:41Come and join us, and then afterwards we can talk.
16:43Okay, it's just a bit of an emergency.
16:45Excuse me.
16:46As-salamu alaykum, everyone.
16:47My family's gone missing.
16:49My parents, Parviz, Latif, and my mother, Tara Latif,
16:52my siblings, Zofi, and Q, Qura Tula'an.
16:56I think some of you know them.
16:58I'm just wondering if you might have heard anything.
17:01I was just hoping someone might be able to help.
17:03Hank!
17:05Hank's head!
17:06Hank!
17:07Hank's head!
17:08What the-
17:09Someone's left a pig's head at the front gate.
17:13You're probably best to leave that alone.
17:18It's...
17:20Wait.
17:21He's with me.
17:22It's-it's-it's mine.
17:24It's mine.
17:33Go the other way!
17:37Quick, down here.
17:42Shit.
17:56Oi!
17:58Get him!
18:00Get in the pack!
18:02Shit!
18:03Look what you've done, Shah!
18:10You owe me an apology, mate.
18:12And a 90 seconds for the algorithm, yeah?
18:15I told you, your failures would catch up to you.
18:19IDF, bastard!
18:20Who recruited you?
18:21Mossad?
18:22IDF.
18:23100% Mossad.
18:24I told you.
18:25He's not Dave Padale.
18:27He's much too short.
18:28You can't.
18:30You can't.
18:30You can't handle them alone.
18:32I told you that you'd need to be...
18:38Him.
18:39않은エアabe 세상-
18:58His mask is aımm.
19:00I told you too.
19:01You can't resist.
19:01Alright, this is mine.
19:05You're such a intoer of hell.
19:07Eu który ous alliance with殺荷,
19:09I told you.
19:09I told you we'll have to offer it in your halt than end.
19:10You're welcome.
19:41Yes, yes, the strong must replace the weak.
19:52Your turn now, Sha.
20:16This is the only way! Can't you see? Surrender! Surrender!
20:53What the fuck? Are you okay?
21:03No. No.
21:10Stop. Stop.
21:16How bad is it?
21:17No, no, no. It's not bad. It's not bad. It's not too bad.
21:19I feel like it's pretty bad. It feels like I'm missing an eye. Am I missing an eye?
21:25You're gonna be okay. All right? You're gonna be okay.
21:27Oh, it's cold. It's so cold. I don't want to die.
21:33Say, I can't do this without you.
21:35I know. You really can't. That other guy, though, the one chasing you, he had potential. Why? Why did you
21:46resist?
21:48You tell me. You're the only one who gets it. You're the only one who gets me. That's why I
21:53need you. But I don't even know who you were.
21:58I was who you needed me to be. Hidden inside the voice of Patrick Stewart. Which is weird. You might
22:09want to unpack that.
22:12No, no, no, no. Don't go. No. We're a team. Okay?
22:17Good luck without me. Dickhead.
22:24Hey. Hey. Hey.
22:30Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.
22:50Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.
22:50Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.
22:51Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.
22:56Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.
22:56Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey
23:00King of the world.
23:03What the fuck?
23:04You're going to be fine.
23:04You're going to be fine.
23:05Okay?
23:06What's going on?
23:07I'm bleeding.
23:07I'm driving you home.
23:09How did you find me?
23:10With extreme difficulty, mate.
23:12Someone posted a video of you doing some weird death soliloquy after being hit by a car.
23:17Oh, yeah.
23:18Was it good?
23:19Oh, shit.
23:20Fuck, the view count's rising.
23:22Oh, fuck my family.
23:23Family is fine.
23:24Q was the one who sent me the clip.
23:26If anything, they are more concerned about you.
23:27Oh, thank God.
23:28Thank God.
23:30Alicia.
23:31Yeah?
23:32I know I haven't been myself recently.
23:34Oh, that was extremely understated.
23:36Do that in the audition, yeah?
23:38What, is that still on?
23:39Yeah, it's still on.
23:40What?
23:41Yeah, no, you don't deserve me.
23:42I even want your slot pushed to the end of the day.
23:44Oh, my God, I fucking love you.
23:46Now, listen, we've got to clean you up, sort this shit out with your family.
23:48Yeah.
23:49I don't need you distracted in the room today, okay?
23:51All right, yeah.
23:52All right.
23:52Absolutely.
23:56Hey, I care about you.
23:58You know that, right?
24:01Yeah, I do.
24:06Mm-hmm.
24:14Hello?
24:15In here, baby.
24:18Salamu al-kong.
24:21Who are you?
24:22We're fine.
24:23How are you?
24:24Okay, I was so worried about you all.
24:28She's fucking crazy, bro.
24:29What the hell are you doing, Felicia?
24:31Going above and beyond as your agent.
24:33Again.
24:35Sit down.
24:36I can't believe I was going to do work.
24:37It's really...
24:37All right, shut up.
24:41You think that I'm going to put up with your crap for eight years and let this opportunity
24:44pass me by?
24:45If you're not happy, then we can talk.
24:47I can change the commission structure.
24:48Oh, I'm not doing this because I'm unhappy.
24:50I'm doing this because you are.
24:52That doesn't even make sense.
24:53Last morning, dear.
24:55Char, do you want to know why you're blocked?
24:58Why you fucked the biggest moment of your career?
25:00You are looking at reason one, two, three, and four.
25:05You are obsessed with getting their blessing.
25:08Their approval.
25:09To be fair, he's been fixated on a lot more people's approval than just ours.
25:12Isn't it?
25:13Yeah, isn't it?
25:14She's right.
25:15You keep trying to take people with you, but that's why there's only two seats in a DBS.
25:19Is that like a jet?
25:20It's an Aston Martin, you idiot.
25:22You know, the fact you didn't even mention the DB12 to him proves to me that you're a bloodcloth pagan.
25:26What the fuck did you call me?
25:27Just use being children.
25:28You don't understand.
25:29Shut the fuck up!
25:30Listen to me, Char.
25:31If you want to nail this audition, you have to eliminate.
25:35All of them first.
25:39But these are my people.
25:42Everything I do is for them.
25:46You're ashamed of them.
25:48You always try to fix and change them, but you can't, so just cut them loose, man.
25:52You told me when you signed me that we were going to change things.
25:55We were going to make a difference.
25:56Yes, to your life.
25:58I'm not trying to give the whole village a piggyback.
26:00I didn't mean village.
26:01We're from Karachi.
26:01We've got running water there, thank you.
26:03Listen, making a difference means paying minimal tax.
26:08Maybe you buy a couple holiday homes.
26:10You can hire a few assistants who look just like you.
26:13That's what I want.
26:14But what do you want, Char?
26:16Material stuff doesn't really matter to me.
26:18I'm an artist.
26:19Don't do that.
26:22Why can't you accept that?
26:23I'm an artist.
26:25Yeah, you know what?
26:26True artists, they don't give a fuck about other people.
26:29What would they think?
26:30Come, let's do this loudmouth first.
26:33Don't do it!
26:39This should be the one who does it.
26:42Say what?
26:46Charchu?
26:47Shut up, mummy.
26:48What the fuck are you doing, bro?
26:49Stop undermining me in front of everyone.
26:51You always do that.
26:53You will not shoot mummy and baba, okay?
26:56I forbid it.
26:56I'm in control now.
26:58Don't talk to your mother like that.
26:59Also, shoot her first.
27:01What?
27:02Come on, Char, everybody knows you pushed him into this.
27:04Your ambition, the pressure, the ridiculous school.
27:08That's from somebody who dragged us all to a whole new country.
27:11My child, I was so happy in box third.
27:13And the best actor of all goes to...
27:15Shut up!
27:16I decide who gets it.
27:18In what order?
27:19Bro, quick sidebar.
27:21Why am I even tied up?
27:23I've been your biggest fan since day.
27:25Do you know how many anonymous tweets I wrote defending you?
27:27Oh, I appreciate that.
27:28Yeah.
27:29I'm your rider, I'll die, cuz.
27:30Obviously, I don't really want to die, but...
27:32Listen, these men are old as fuck.
27:33Like, they're on their way out already.
27:34You can do them guilt-free, do you know what I'm saying?
27:36Give me your shush, okay?
27:37You're only here for the free shit and the clout anyway.
27:39How about you, shush?
27:40Yeah?
27:40You've been jealous of this man before he could walk?
27:41I took...
27:42Bro, I've been here for you since day one.
27:45I took a knife for you.
27:46Yeah?
27:47And my brother, I need to be here with you, for you, to defend you off from these snakes.
27:51You're ungrateful...
27:52Shut up, buddy.
27:53It's for the me, cuz.
27:54Yeah?
27:54Any time I took the piss out of you, it was just character building.
27:57I was building you.
27:57You hate him.
27:59Shahjoo, Jana, shoot Zulfi.
28:00He would have strangled you in the crib if he couldn't...
28:02Hey, listen, nobody's shooting anywhere.
28:03Shut up!
28:06Oh, Allah.
28:10Cuz?
28:13I just wanna say, yeah?
28:16Cuz me, you know I'm here, Katnoth.
28:17I wanna apologize for saying...
28:23Oh, okay.
28:24Good.
28:25Yeah, nah, you got rid of the most toxic elements in our family, so...
28:27Yeah, bro, you know what?
28:28He actually did well.
28:29I kinda rate that, so that was mad.
28:31Like, we weren't expecting that, were we?
28:32I wasn't expecting...
28:36Oh.
28:43It's always been you and me, Shahjoo.
28:45Mm-hmm.
28:50Just me and my beautiful boy.
29:03Where am I?
29:04Hmm.
29:05Nice little sleep.
29:07How many fingers?
29:08Three.
29:09Name?
29:10Says here Shahj...
29:12Shahjoo.
29:13Yeah, everyone calls me Shah.
29:15May I?
29:18Mm-hmm.
29:19Your abs aren't the best missing the teeth.
29:22It's been a long day.
29:23Yeah?
29:23What do you do for a living?
29:25I'm a nectar.
29:27What, you been in there?
29:28You think I've seen?
29:30Probably not.
29:32Might be an exchange bonder.
29:37Won't do this in a couple of hours.
29:39You're taking a piss?
29:40Mm-hmm.
29:40I mean, you have to before you go anywhere.
29:43You're dehydrated, love.
29:44Fuck.
29:45My...
29:46My family, they're gone, they're missing.
29:51Sounds like a busy day.
29:53Doctor will be in soon.
29:56Bond.
29:57Huh?
29:59Break a leg.
30:01Yeah.
30:24Yeah, I'm not stuck to the place.
30:26It's fine.
30:26It's fine.
30:28I mean, I just changed it.
30:29I mean, I just changed it.
30:29I mean, I should be fine.
30:31Thanks.
30:34Mr. Lateef, what are you doing?
30:36I need you to go back to your room.
30:38You can't keep me in here.
30:41What are you doing, bro?
30:42We're in here.
30:43What the fuck are you doing here?
30:44What do you mean?
30:45Why do you never reply to your text, man?
30:47Oi, you two.
30:48Look who's finally shown up.
30:50Oh, my God.
30:51Baba.
30:52Rift away, where are you?
30:53Oh, my God.
30:54Shadjoo.
30:54Huh?
30:55I told you, here you come.
30:59What happened to you, man?
31:00You look like shit.
31:01I just, I slipped and I hit my head like an idiot.
31:03That's all.
31:03What happened to you, Bob?
31:04This is a little heartache.
31:05Nothing to piss your pants about.
31:07Where's Sophie?
31:08He's off with his new boyfriend.
31:16Oh, um, it's, it's Braviz, okay?
31:19You've got more to worry about than Braviz.
31:20This is about Q.
31:21I'm sorry, okay?
31:22We were just halal texting.
31:23Okay, it was one weird pic.
31:24Can you shut the fuck up?
31:25I'm not here about Q.
31:26She can deal with you herself.
31:27I respect her.
31:28You disrespected me, didn't you?
31:29And you're wasting my time.
31:31Okay.
31:32Can I be honest with you?
31:34I love Muba, okay?
31:36And so does the investment team in Dubai.
31:39For real?
31:39Tomorrow afternoon, I'm flying out.
31:41Muba is first thing on the agenda.
31:46Tomorrow afternoon?
31:48Yeah, you know what?
31:49Come with me.
31:49I love you.
31:51I'll pay for your flight.
31:52Right.
31:54I think I've got to see everyone now.
31:56Bro, they're getting on a plane.
31:57Well, then come.
31:58We've got to go.
31:58Wait, you have your audition today.
32:00Mummy, fuck the audition.
32:02I have to see Sophie.
32:04Q, man.
32:06I can't do this without you.
32:09Is your phone fully charged?
32:10Yeah.
32:11Then yeah, I can't do this without you.
32:18I could get fired for just having you in this car.
32:21Oh, yeah.
32:21Sophie banned you from the app.
32:23Nice.
32:24No, nothing's going to happen to you, mate.
32:26That's me on the dashboard, all right?
32:28Really?
32:30I thought it was Dev Patel.
32:32Right, you know what?
32:34You get it before 3.30, I'll give you an extra 20 quid, how's that?
32:36Hey, chill.
32:38Yeah, this is my account.
32:38I'm good for the dough.
32:39No, you ain't.
32:40You're broke as fuck.
32:42What?
32:43You leave tags on your clothes.
32:48It's hard to return them with the tags off, all right?
32:50All right, stop it, bro.
32:51It's embarrassing.
32:52Shit.
32:53We might not even make it in time.
32:54You'll make it.
32:55I know all the shortcuts for the airport while aborting all the speed cameras and CCTV.
33:00I could even get you through security and onto a runway if you want.
33:04Just drive the car, please drive the car.
33:06To the terminal, not the runway.
33:18That way.
33:23Duh.
33:25Oh, shit.
33:26Yasmin.
33:28What are you doing here?
33:29I'm just, um...
33:30Oh, my God.
33:30You can't keep doing this.
33:32I can't believe this is happening.
33:34Um, I thought I made it clear when we spoke last night that this isn't...
33:37Oh, no, I'm not here to try and stop you leaving.
33:40Oh.
33:40We actually need to try and stop someone else leaving.
33:44I'm sorry, you saw him last night.
33:46You didn't tell me that.
33:47Oli, right?
33:48Hey, nice to meet you, man.
33:49Yeah, I've heard a lot about you.
33:51Oh, my God.
33:52What happened?
33:53Yeah, yeah.
33:54Well, that's right.
33:55It's worse than it looks.
33:57Bro, seriously, I've got to go.
33:58Yeah.
33:58We've got to go.
33:59What are you, lads?
33:59Six to do?
34:00Hmm?
34:01Come on.
34:04What was that, Yasmin?
34:06Oh, you got it.
34:06You got it.
34:07You got it.
34:07Yeah.
34:09Excuse me.
34:10Sorry.
34:10I'm sorry.
34:11I'm sorry.
34:11Excuse me.
34:12Sorry.
34:13Sorry.
34:14Whoa.
34:15Boarding pass.
34:16We don't have boarding passes, but somebody that we really need to speak to has just gone through.
34:20Yeah.
34:20That's not how it works.
34:22Sorry.
34:22One sec.
34:23Have you got any photos of Sophie on the phone?
34:25Yeah.
34:25I mean, I'll do.
34:27Excuse me.
34:28We have reason to believe that this individual is a terror suspect and a security threat.
34:32Sure.
34:32We need to locate them and stop them immediately.
34:34One moment, sir.
34:36What the fuck are you doing, Bob?
34:37Trust me.
34:38It's going to work.
34:38No, no.
34:39I'm like, Bob.
34:41Right.
34:42You said something about security.
34:43I did.
34:43Yeah.
34:44He's traveling to the Middle East.
34:45He runs a complex network of drivers, couriers, and black market dash cam suppliers.
34:49And how do you know this?
34:50I have links to the security establishment.
34:52What links?
34:53MI5.
34:54Sorry.
34:54MI5.
34:58Yeah.
34:58Not buying it.
34:59Next.
35:01I'm sorry.
35:02What do you mean you're not buying it?
35:05I, you know, turn of voice, body language, the whole performance, really.
35:07I just didn't see it in the eyes.
35:09Let me go again.
35:09You film it this time, and we can watch it back together.
35:11You are already on camera.
35:12If you keep annoying me, I'm going to put you on the news.
35:15Better than having a hundred dead bodies and exploding 747 on the news.
35:18They don't fly 747s anymore.
35:20Because of people like this, I'm trying to tell you.
35:22Trained in Chechnya, fought in Afghanistan, the Battle of Kandahar.
35:25Maybe you've...
35:25What are you doing?
35:28He's saying you're a security threat and a terrorist.
35:30I'm an entrepreneur.
35:33Sorry.
35:35Hey.
35:36Can we talk?
35:37Next.
35:37Yeah.
35:42You got blood?
35:44Oh, yeah.
35:45I got hit by a car.
35:48You hurt?
35:49Yeah.
35:49Good.
35:55Bro, I'm sorry.
35:58I'm really, really sorry.
35:59I've been a fucking dickhead.
36:01Shoot this.
36:02My whole life, I've seen you out here.
36:04Yeah?
36:05Doing you.
36:07I've been at home, bro.
36:09Trying to repay your family for taking me and QA.
36:15I should thank you.
36:17You know what you made me realize?
36:19I have to do me.
36:23Yeah.
36:26Wait, is this like a real thank you?
36:27Like a fuck you thank you?
36:29Both.
36:31I'm tired of being the little baby.
36:33I'm not trying to be a junior partner in a relationship.
36:36And I hear that.
36:37Yeah.
36:37I don't want to control you.
36:39I'm sorry, I sweated you.
36:41I've just been ticking boxes my whole life.
36:45And...
36:46You're not a box.
36:47You are a flower.
36:50With layers.
36:51Like an onion.
36:52Okay, you need to work on that.
36:53Yeah.
36:56What are you getting on a plane?
36:59I'm back in four days.
37:02Oh.
37:02Why did you just call me anyway?
37:04This is too important.
37:10I love you, bro.
37:12See you again?
37:12I said you're a fucking prick.
37:14You're a little prick too.
37:15Yeah.
37:19Yeah, that way.
37:22Economy.
37:23I'll see you at baggage claim.
37:25For fuck's sake.
37:28Yes.
37:28I'll put yourself together.
37:29I'll be grinning the air for you, please.
37:31Ma'am, give me my phone, please.
37:32It's children, bro.
37:34Psycho.
37:37I don't know if you're still down,
37:38but you could probably still make an audition.
37:42I don't know if you're still down, but you could still be back with us.
38:17I don't know.
38:48I don't know.
39:05There he is.
39:08Someone's had a busy few days.
39:11So, um, we're just going to go straight to the monologue, okay?
39:16Please tell me you're ready.
39:18Reporting for duty, ma'am.
39:19Set on camera.
39:20Fire on set.
39:22Sound speed.
39:23Screen test, Charlotte Eve, take two.
39:29And we're set, and...
39:34Action.
39:36I could have just as easily and a few centimetres to the left.
39:39It wouldn't have mattered to you at all, would it?
39:42Just as long as you were pleasing your masters.
39:46Letting them tell you exactly who to be.
39:50But I see you.
39:53And when it's just you, all alone, tell me...
39:58How do you live with yourself?
40:02Do you even know who you are anymore?
40:09Do you want to know what it's like?
40:13Doing the dirty work.
40:16Fighting everybody.
40:18And being a nobody.
40:22The blood of my hands is mine.
40:28Because I kill a part of myself every day.
40:33I don't...
40:37Live with myself.
40:42Live with whoever you need me to be.
40:50If I don't know why I'm, it's good.
40:55You don't want to know.
40:59And cut!
41:00Truck!
41:11I've never seen anybody turn a performance around like this.
41:14You see, you just...
41:16I think I get it now.
41:18Okay, well, great.
41:19Now, it's just one more thing.
41:20It's just, you know, a bit of a rite of passage.
41:24Okay.
41:25Congratulations.
41:32Back to one.
41:33Yes, thank you.
41:34Great.
41:35Okay.
41:36So now you're going to say your name in three...
41:44Two...
41:46Two...
41:47One...
41:52Action!
41:54The names...
41:58Shah Jahan.
42:00For more information visit www.fema.gov