00:04Hey! Ladies and gentlemen, my next guest is Mr. Bob Newhart, who just happens to be
00:09one of the nicest guys in show business. And I'll tell you something, everything Bob does
00:14is funny, but there's one thing that really breaks me up, and I asked him to do me a big
00:19favor and repeat it on my show tonight. Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Bob Newhart!
00:32Thank you, Dean. This has to do with inventions and how it takes like 40 or 50 years before
00:37an invention is really recognized as being a great invention. When they first come out,
00:41no one recognizes what an advancement they are, like the telephone or the electric light
00:44or the airplane. They were thought of as rich man's playthings when they first came out.
00:49And also the tobacco industry. Today, as you know, is a multi-billion dollar business, but
00:54came to us from very humble beginnings. It was brought to the attention of civilization
00:58by Sir Walter Raleigh, who was working for the West Indies Company here in the colonies.
01:02And the uses of tobacco are not obvious right off the bat. If you tried to explain tobacco
01:07to someone who was not familiar with it, it would not be an easy task. So I imagine a phone
01:11conversation between Sir Walter Raleigh and the head of the West Indies Company in London,
01:15England, and I imagine it went something like this.
01:21Who is it, Mary? Sir Walter Raleigh from the colonies, huh?
01:28Yeah, yeah, yeah, put them on, put them on, would you, Mary?
01:34Harry? Harry, you want to pick up your extension? Yeah, it's Nutty Wall again.
01:41Well, hi, Wall Guy. Well, it's great hearing your voice again. It sure is, Walt. Things are
01:48fine here in England, Walt. Did the what? Did the boatload of turkeys arrive? All right.
01:55Yeah, they arrive fine, Walt. They're still here, as a matter of fact, Walt. They're wandering
02:00all over London, as a matter of fact. See, that's only an American holiday, Walt. Right.
02:08You have another one, another winner for us, do you, Walt? Tobacco. What is tobacco, Walt?
02:20That's a sort of leaf. And you bought 80 tons of it. Let me just make sure I have this
02:30right
02:30now, Walt. You're, uh, you're, you're sending us 80 tons of leaves. Is, is that right, Walt?
02:35Huh?
02:37Walt, this, uh, this may come as a little bit of a surprise to you. Um, see, come, come fall,
02:44here in England, Walt. Yeah, we're, we're sort of up to our... It is, it isn't that sort
02:50of leaf. It has a lot of different uses. What, what, what are some of the uses, Walt, since,
02:56since we are getting 80 tons of this stuff. Uh, Walt, are, are you saying snuff? Uh-huh.
03:04What, what, what, what, what is snuff, Walt? You, you, you take a pinch of tobacco. And, and,
03:14and you shove it up your nose, Walt. And it, and it makes you sneeze. Yeah, I guess, I, I
03:22guess
03:23it went at that, uh, uh, wouldn't it, Walt? Gee, uh, uh, goldenrod seems to do it, uh, uh,
03:28pretty well here, Walt.
03:31Walt, does this, does this tobacco have, have any other uses, you know, just, just on the
03:36off chance that this, uh, this snuff didn't, didn't catch on right off the bat?
03:43You, you, you can chew it. Or, or, or put it in a pipe. Or, or, or you, or you
03:52can shred
03:53it up. Put, put, put it on a piece of paper. Roll, roll, roll up the piece of paper. Don't,
04:07don't, don't tell me, Walt, Walt. Yes, you, you, you're sticking it in your ear, right,
04:14Walt? Between your lips, Walt, huh? That's, that's what you're doing, huh, Walt?
04:31You know, we, uh, we, we've been a little worried about you, Walt. Ever, ever since you
04:42put, you put your cape down over all that mud, Walt. A lot, a lot of people have a cigarette,
04:49right, right, right after their first cup of coffee in the morning.
04:54Walt, I'm, I'm almost afraid to ask, Walt. What's, what's, what's coffee, Walt?
05:02That, that's a drink you pound out of beans, eh, Walt? I'll tell you what, Walt, um, why,
05:09why not send us a bottle of those beans, Walt? I mean, if you can sell people on, on sticking
05:13burning leaves in their mouth, uh, they, they gotta go for those beans, Walt, no, no question
05:17at all. Well, nice, nice talking to you, Walt, and listen, Walt, next, next time, don't call
05:22us, we, we'll call you, right. Good, good, good.
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