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00:01And we're live in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
00:11Welcome to the naughtiest show on television.
00:15Coming to you live from Carinium Studios.
00:18Uncensored.
00:19Tonight we'll be bringing you the stories they don't want you to hear.
00:23We name the breakfast television presenter who's been staying up late with Ladies of the Night.
00:27And as rumors circulate about a famous pop star's homosexuality, our celebrity panel wanders.
00:33Who are the poofs of pop?
00:35But first, love and prayers from everyone at Carinium.
00:39For our beloved leader, Lord Battingham.
00:43Fuck you!
00:45Everyone at Carinium has been shocked and saddened by his tragic accident.
00:49Don't you ever stop, I'm here with you.
00:55Lord Battingham, Tony, wasn't just our boss.
00:58He was our family.
01:21What's happened?
01:23But it takes more than a little bump to the head to keep Tony Battingham down.
01:26What a surprise!
01:28Hello!
01:29Hello!
01:32Hello!
01:33Help me!
01:34Help me!
01:34Get me!
01:38Don't you?
01:40No, I'm not!
01:55That must've been you!
03:43Welcome to Bella Vista.
03:46Val's had her eye on this since we moved to Green Lawns.
03:48It's nice though, being right here in Penscombe, near Rupert and you lot.
03:52We brought our swimming costumes.
03:54Ah.
03:54Well, Val's got some rules.
03:56No running, pushing, ducking, bombing or skinny dipping.
04:01What about heavy petting?
04:03Go for your life, as long as you keep your cozies on.
04:06Ah!
04:07Freeman!
04:08Come on!
04:12Woo!
04:12Let's go!
04:13Bella invited the polo team round for some swimming.
04:17Val's turned it into a bloody circus.
04:20You all right, lads?
04:21You all right.
04:25Freddie!
04:26Freddie!
04:26Sebi and Domi Carlisle.
04:27People call them the Heavenly Twins.
04:29Although they're not identical.
04:30Sebi's taller and apparently Domi's got a big willy.
04:33Oh!
04:35Where's the pole, Mr Jones?
04:38Follow me.
04:39Hi.
04:47Welcome to Bella Vista.
04:49We called it Bella Vista because it means nice view.
04:54It's so wonderful to be able to stand at the bottom of one's drive and not be able to see
04:59one's house.
05:00Right, if you'd like to go through.
05:02Shoes off, everyone, please.
05:06Who's the heavenly girl?
05:08One of Baz's stick chicks.
05:10I tell you what, Patrick.
05:11They only let beautiful people play polo.
05:13Why'd they let you play, then?
05:14I'm the patron of the Joneses Jets.
05:17Patron?
05:18Is that how polo people say it?
05:19Yeah, I just give them a load of money to sponsor the team and then they stick me on a
05:22pony and they set me up to score goals and look good.
05:25We're finally where we belong, aren't we, Fred Freds?
05:30Shall we?
05:38It's so nice to have a man around the house.
05:42Oh, so nice to have a man around the house.
05:47Someone sweet who's glad he found you, who will put his arms around you and his kisses just astound you.
05:54It's so nice.
05:55Oh, a house is just a house without a man.
06:01He's the necessary evil in your plan.
06:05There are many things about him you just cannot do without him.
06:11Though it's just a constant game of cat and a mouse.
06:15It's so nice to have a man around the house.
06:27Tacky, did you make all these?
06:30Uh, yes.
06:32Hmm.
06:33Hmm.
06:36Trick me with a fork.
06:37I'm done.
06:39Right.
06:41Ventura meeting.
06:42Jacuzzi.
06:43Let's talk polo.
06:48It's our first chance of making TV.
06:50We're gonna film the match,
06:52plug the footage to the BBC and show everyone that Ventura can cover sports.
06:56Your people really want to watch polo.
06:58I love watching polo.
07:00It's the Russia Cup.
07:01This has been held on the estate since 1874.
07:04You sure you want me on celly on a horse?
07:06Pony.
07:07What?
07:08With no bloody Rupert.
07:09Our teams are manned out.
07:10Still no word for me.
07:11What, Cameron?
07:12Not even a bloody phone call.
07:14It's pandemonium at Carinium.
07:15No, Cameron.
07:16Tony's still off work after his accident.
07:18I'm in charge of everything.
07:19But you're Ventura, what?
07:21I'm double agenting, Henry.
07:22Remember?
07:23Oh, yes.
07:24Sorry, Charles.
07:25As I hate to admit it, but I was under the impression we had already won the franchise, huh?
07:29We won the right to compete against Carinium.
07:32Jesus, Henry.
07:32It's a good thing I'm hiring proper staff.
07:35The Prime Minister's really quite ticked off.
07:36The general election stays away and nobody's heard from him.
07:39Stop it.
07:39Last time Rupert got himself lost in a sex marathon, he didn't come up for air for a month.
07:42Oh!
07:43Oh!
07:44Oh!
07:45Oh!
07:48Devil's egg, your holiness.
07:52Lady Hampshire.
07:54Why not, Mrs. Jones?
07:55Oh, no.
07:56Please.
07:57Call me Mousy.
07:59Oh, have we told you that Wayne is starting Eton in September?
08:03We're very proud of him.
08:07How did he get in?
08:08Did Freddie donate a computer lamp?
08:11Well, now he passed the exam.
08:17Woo!
08:19No!
08:22Charge away!
08:26Oh, Apollo!
08:31Willy!
08:32Break, break, break, break, break!
08:34Come on!
08:36Come on!
08:37Come on!
08:38Come on!
08:39Come on!
08:40Come on!
08:41Neil, kill it, Neil, kill it, Neil, kill it.
08:44Geronimo!
08:47You!
08:48I said no!
08:49I'm scared!
08:50He's dead!
08:52Hey!
08:56I really didn't want to see my brother completely naked, but I saw the Carlisle twins bits.
09:02I'm taking that as a win.
09:04I thought Sebby's willy was nicer.
09:07Have you still not heard anything more from your Seb, Tag?
09:09Oh, he was never my Seb.
09:11His letter was lovely and his new job sounds amazing.
09:14He dumped you in a letter?
09:14The shame!
09:15Have you heard from Cameron since she's been off shagging Rupert, dipstick?
09:24Tag?
09:25What's the matter?
09:32Um...
09:32Rupert kissed me.
09:34Fucking fuck!
09:35What?
09:37Where?
09:38Uh, in the kitchen.
09:39No, I meant where did he kiss you?
09:40Oh, uh, on the mouth.
09:42Yeah, he said such lovely things and then the next day he just disappeared.
09:46Oh, Tag.
09:48Is he gonna breathe without me?
09:52I just don't believe he would say that and then just disappear.
09:57It doesn't make sense.
10:00Something awful must have happened.
10:03Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
10:29oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
10:32oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
10:32oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
10:32oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
10:32oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
10:40Plenty more where that came from.
10:41I mean, bringing me here, keeping me safe.
10:45That's just good manners.
10:47Rupert, be serious for a moment.
10:51I promised I would protect you.
10:54And I will.
10:56So you hide me here forever?
10:58Well, we don't have to stay in Devon.
11:01We're friends all over the world.
11:03We keep moving.
11:05Stay ahead of the game.
11:07Stay ahead of the game.
11:41No, come on.
11:55I don't know.
11:57No, no, no.
11:59No, no.
12:00Oh, come on.
12:01I'm doing really well, Dad.
12:03We thought you were dead.
12:05Don't be daft, Camilla.
12:06Daddy's invincible.
12:07Thank you, Beatrice.
12:08If you packed your belongings for school,
12:10the car will be waiting to take you back, girls.
12:12Archie will go by train.
12:14Listen to your mother.
12:17Thank you, darling.
12:20You really don't remember anything.
12:25No, I got to the police.
12:26It's a complete blank.
12:28It's extraordinary, isn't it?
12:32No, it's very kind of you.
12:33Thanks for your concern.
12:38Yes, it's certainly very nice to be home.
12:42I know, I know, I know.
12:43Quite the end of theory's cliffhanger.
12:52Thank you so much.
12:53Yes, it's splendid to be back home with the family.
12:56You too, Lady Gosling.
12:57Thank you. Good night.
13:03You should be heading up the wooden hill to Bedfordshire, Tony.
13:07I'll redress your wound for you.
13:09Let me look up down there.
13:12No cigars.
13:13Hmm.
13:17Come on, dogs.
13:18Yes, sir!
13:19Come on.
13:33Oh, God.
13:36Yes!
13:53I didn't clean it.
14:00Do you think she's gone back to America?
14:04She's gone to Rupert Campbell Black.
14:09Hunt the bitch down.
14:14From the moment he met Maude, he was infatuated.
14:18Words started pouring out of him.
14:20Everything he ever wrote was for her.
14:22This hugely magnetic woman who constantly rejected him.
14:26Anyone would think this was your biography, Declan.
14:29That's why it has to be me who tells the eight story.
14:32I mean, documentaries are normally so dry.
14:35No offense, Mike.
14:37Maude gone.
14:38Married someone else just to get a rise out of Yates.
14:41What does Yates do?
14:43Tries to seduce her daughter.
14:45Sounds like EastEnders.
14:47EastEnders did get 28 million viewers last month.
14:54Documentaries aren't presented by celebrities.
14:57Whatever next?
14:57Joanna Lovely on plumbing.
15:00Listen, we really do want your face back on the b-bold boy.
15:04Would you consider hosting breakfast time?
15:07Frank Boff's on his way out.
15:08Right on to the mornings.
15:10Oh.
15:10Can I say, Jeremy, this is exactly what the BBC Documentary Department are looking for.
15:17New formats bringing the wonders of the world to a wider audience.
15:20Declan O'Hara, Irish God, and British National Treasure.
15:24And who got his big break at the BBC?
15:26Look, it's relevant.
15:29It's noisy.
15:30It's informative.
15:31But gripping.
15:32Homework becomes entertainment.
15:35A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down.
15:37In a most delightful way.
15:42Oh, thank you.
15:45Oh, let's see.
15:46You're all so kind.
15:47Thank you so much.
15:49Excuse me.
15:50So sweet.
16:06You came.
16:07You came.
16:11You're sticking O'Hara.
16:13Come over here.
16:14Oh, my God.
16:18Oh, my God.
16:21Oh, my God.
16:21Your love is king.
16:24Crown you in my heart.
16:27Well, Caitlin fell asleep.
16:28Patrick has script notes for Ibsen and Taggy.
16:32Well, she couldn't make head nor tail of a thief.
16:34I mean, I love the play.
16:35It's just a really small part.
16:38My blink and you miss me, right?
16:40I mean...
16:41You don't have to be kind, Declan.
16:45It's...
16:47I really appreciate you coming.
16:53House falling apart without me, is it?
16:55It's quieter.
16:56Hey!
16:58I mean, the kids seem okay.
17:00Sure, why wouldn't they be?
17:02You're doing a play.
17:03We're all very happy for you.
17:05They've offered me the tour.
17:08Right.
17:11That's good news?
17:16But I really want to come home once we've finished in London.
17:20Oh, thank God.
17:24But I meant what I said, Declan.
17:26I need to keep working.
17:29Understood.
17:33Are you dancing?
17:35Are you asking?
17:38No one else is.
17:41Never stopped us before.
17:44Your love is king
17:46Never need to part
17:48Your kisses ring
17:52Round and round and round my head
17:55Touching a very part of me
17:57It's making my soul sing
18:00I'm crying out for more
18:02Your love is king
18:06Your love is king
18:08I'm coming home
18:12I'm coming home
18:14I'm coming
18:18You're making me dance
18:24Inside
18:24Inside
18:27Inside
18:29Touching a very part of me
18:31It's making my soul sing
18:34Tearing a very heart of me
18:37I'm crying out for more
18:52This turned into a worthwhile trip
18:57I had a meeting with Jeremy Bonington earlier
19:00The BBC are interested in turning my Yates biography into a documentary
19:06Right
19:07I really want to film it in Sligo
19:09And I'm playing Maud Gawne, right?
19:14Sure a West End star now
19:15I couldn't afford you
19:16Stage hands have more to do than me
19:18Oh my god
19:20The Christmas tree
19:25I like the Christmas tree
19:30What do you think of the new ending?
19:34Hmm
19:36Yeah
19:37I mean it was sacrilegious
19:41But it gave a new meaning I suppose
19:43You fucking bullshitter
19:47The only thing the producers haven't changed
19:49Is the ending
19:50She still leaves her husband and children for a better life
19:54But you wouldn't know that
19:55Just as you didn't know
19:56The Christmas tree fell over tonight
19:58Because you didn't watch the play
20:01Maud
20:02Get out
20:03Listen
20:04The meeting is ran over
20:06I had every intention of going
20:07Don't fucking get out
20:08Maud
20:08Get up
20:09Come on
20:09Please don't
20:10Just get out
20:11Just fucking get out
20:15Maud
20:18Maud
20:19Maud
20:19Maud
20:30Maud
20:31Ladies
20:36Is that Terry Wogan?
20:38Man
20:40That was a two-year-old
21:08Man
21:36CHOIR SINGS
21:58Sorry I'm late, darling. I've had a terrible headache.
22:30I've had a terrible headache.
23:03I've had a terrible headache.
23:04What the fuck is this?
23:06I'm giving you a choice.
23:08A choice?
23:11I tried to kill you, Tony.
23:14Well, because I hurt you and you were defending yourself. We both got a little carried away.
23:18I lay in that hospital bed and wondered what this meant for our relationship.
23:25I could have you punished, sent you to prison. I can't imagine America would want you back after that.
23:33But then I thought of the alternative.
23:35And that is?
23:38Forgiveness.
23:42I've already told the police I don't remember anything.
23:45If you stay with Karinian, stay with me, I will remember it was a simple accident.
23:58I love you, Cameron.
24:01No, you don't love me.
24:05You just want to beat Rupert.
24:08I can't imagine her at all.
24:18I can't imagine her at all.
24:45Rumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated.
24:49Which one of you greased the front steps, eh?
24:52No, seriously.
24:53Do be careful entering and exiting the building.
24:56My little slip could have been far, far worse.
24:59Thank goodness for Miss Madden.
25:01Joyce, I can always trust you to catch me when I fall.
25:05I would like to welcome back Cameron Cook,
25:09who's been taking time away to study the opposition.
25:13Her first-class espionage means we are now fully abreast of venturous plans
25:18and are ready to knock them out of the competition.
25:21Thank you, Miss Cook.
25:22There are no lengths you won't go
25:24in order to keep Karinian, this franchise bid,
25:28and all our livelihoods safe.
25:38Because make no mistake, we are under attack.
25:44Venturer, led by Rupert Campbell Black and Declan O'Hara,
25:49will continue to solicit employees from our ranks to elicit confidential information.
25:55Those venturite gangsters have no scruples.
26:00So be on your guard.
26:03Trust no one.
26:06Oh, Charles, where's Charles Furman?
26:09Here, Tony.
26:10Charles has done a fantastic job covering Cameron's role while she's been away,
26:14so thank you, Charles.
26:16Now, Beatty and Sarah's Uncensored is demolishing the competition.
26:21The teams are gearing up to shoot series three of four men went to mow in September.
26:27Master Dog will be back.
26:29Bigger and barkier than ever.
26:31With James Verica back on presenting duties.
26:34Woof.
26:361987 is a franchise year, ladies and gentlemen, and we are at war.
26:42An eye for an eye, we'll take their fucking heads off!
26:48Yes!
26:49Yes.
27:24Rupert.
27:25Sorry, Tag, not now.
27:28Battingham found out about Cameron and me.
27:31She thought he was gonna kill her, so she walloped him.
27:34Shame she didn't succeed.
27:35That's why we had to get away.
27:37She was in danger, I had to protect her, but he found us.
27:42So why has she gone back to him?
27:43I don't know, she just got into the helicopter.
27:45Doesn't seem like Cameron.
27:47She's such a tough cookie.
27:49She was scared of him.
27:50We've got to get her out of there.
27:53Rupert, she's a big girl.
27:55If she's gone back to him, then maybe we've got to accept her.
27:58No, it's not like her. There's got to be something else going on.
28:01You're wrong, Rupert. She's definitely Team Carinium.
28:04She's back at Tony's side as if nothing ever happened.
28:07And there's something else.
28:09Tony says that we're now filming the polo match on Sunday.
28:13No, we're filming the polo match on Sunday.
28:16I'm sorry, Declan, it's all set.
28:18Carinium are filming the polo too.
28:23Well, let's get ready for a fight.
28:33Good morning. Hello.
28:35Hmm.
28:37Rupert Campbell-Blanc, welcome to Ventura.
28:38Mike Maples.
28:39Oh!
28:40Tired to be here.
28:41Are you ready?
28:42Well, I left behind regular hours and a BBC pension
28:45to work for my Broadcasting Heroes Renegade Production Company.
28:49I've never been so poor or so happy.
28:52Ha, ha, ha, ha.
28:59All right, on schedule.
29:15Okay, make sure that he's done right away.
29:18Cameron.
29:22Beautiful day for it.
29:25Let's have a fair fight.
29:28Make the best team win.
29:33You can't make television without being a cunt, Tony.
29:36It's not nearly so much fun though, is it?
29:39Go on, Cameron.
29:43What are you doing?
29:44Staying ahead of the game.
29:47Come on, lads.
29:48It's time for David to kick a lion's arse.
30:08Dance, dance.
30:11Put on your red shoes and dance the blues.
30:16Dance, dance.
30:18To the song they're playing on the radio.
30:26If you say run, I'll run with you.
30:34If you say hide, we'll hide.
30:41Because my love for you would break my heart in two.
30:50If you should fall into my arms, tremble like a flower.
31:04Dance, dance.
31:13Dance, dance.
31:15Dance, dance.
31:16If you feel the grace you fall.
31:21Dance, dance.
31:24If you feel tonight is all.
31:30Dance, wait.
31:32You could look so sexy.
31:36What?
31:37This is my new favorite sport.
31:39Yes, no one's actually here to watch polo.
31:41They're here to watch each other.
31:46Has Rupert said anything?
31:49I've heard him say he wants to get Cameron back.
31:53There aren't less complicated men to fall in love with.
32:02Polo Polo, the sport of kings.
32:05Four players per team, four chukkas per game, seven minutes per chukka.
32:09Look at all the pretty horses.
32:11Let's horse around. Horseplay.
32:13Par for the horse.
32:15Ponies. Can I get some water please?
32:17What?
32:18They're called ponies, James.
32:19You thought ponies were baby horses?
32:21Apparently not.
32:22Stupid game.
32:23Standby to record.
32:26Floor standing by.
32:27Waiting for shot to clear. We ready?
32:29Chukka, chukka, chukka, chukka con, chukka con.
32:31Okay, on camera one and action.
32:34Did you know, James, that polo is the oldest ball sport in the world?
32:37Dating back to 600 BC.
32:40Yes, Sarah, I did.
32:41Now, viewers at home will be wondering why you're wearing that rather fetching jumpsuit.
32:46Are you auditioning for treasure hunt?
32:51Oh no! Yucky!
32:54Oh my God.
32:54I'm so sorry.
32:55This is polo Ralph Lauren.
32:57We have BT standing by to take over.
32:59I can feel it on me. I can feel it on me.
33:01Did you strip James off?
33:02Oh, she's already on it.
33:05It's not on my trousers.
33:06It's not on my trousers.
33:07It's just me being in the van.
33:11Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the final of the Russia Cup at the estate of Lord and Lady Hampshire.
33:16We have four-time winners and last year's champions, the Remington Steelers playing against newcomers, the Jones Jets.
33:26The match is about to start.
33:29Standby.
33:30Let's rock and roll!
33:32One or a half-time.
33:40Two, three, four!
33:41And go away!
33:45A lovely crop.
33:50Come back against the cattle back!
33:52Eight!
33:56One!
33:57Two, three.
33:57One!
33:59Two, three!
33:59Two, four!
34:00Two, three!
34:03Ready?
34:04Oh!
34:05Yes!
34:07Go, Freddy!
34:08Go on, Freddy!
34:09Go!
34:11Go, Freddy!
34:13Come on, Chris!
34:22Come on, Chris!
34:23Yeah!
34:33What on earth is that woman doing?
34:36Oh, her high heels are stuck in the mud, Gwendolyn.
34:39She looks as though she needs to go to the moon.
34:44I'll get you some shampoo.
34:48It's wonderful to see you out and about again, Monica.
34:51Tony's accident must have been very hard on you.
34:55Well, we're all soldiers on now.
34:59Do let Hermione and me know if we can help at all.
35:02Us Wickham Abbey girls must look out for one another.
35:07Well, I must say, Mrs. Stratton looks ready for action in her boiler seat.
35:11Art, Sarah has a surprise for us after the final chakai, Reverend Penny. I enjoy that.
35:15Ooh, what's a surprise?
35:17Wouldn't be a fucking surprise if I told you, would it?
35:19Now let's enjoy these fools getting beaten.
35:24We're right back in it now, pushing hard.
35:26We're going to play from the trade for Donny and Sebi passing between each other.
35:32They cross to Jasper.
35:34He takes it.
35:35And that's a goal!
35:37You can see guys.
35:38Fuck!
35:39No!
35:40Well, that's some sexy fucking polo.
35:42Fucking...
35:42No!
35:43No!
35:44And with the score now at one goal apiece, it makes it even Stevens at the end of the second
35:50chukka.
35:51My lords, ladies and gentlemen, please take to the pitch, or give it a stampede.
35:59Oh, sorry!
36:00Sorry!
36:01Sorry!
36:01Come here!
36:02Sorry!
36:03He just loves telly.
36:06Which side are you on?
36:07Uh, Carinium.
36:08Hello.
36:09I'm Carinium.
36:10Ah.
36:12Is Master Dog coming back?
36:14Of course!
36:15Are you thinking of entering?
36:16Oh!
36:17David does not enjoy the spotlight.
36:19I like having my belly rubbed in front of Knott's Landing.
36:22Don't be all David.
36:24David Bow Wowie, if you please.
36:26Ah!
36:28Would you like to watch the filming with me?
36:30Could we?
36:31That's awfully kind of you.
36:33Charles.
36:34Fairbound.
36:35Muffy.
36:36Short for Caroline.
36:43Sweaty work.
36:46Might go back to mine in, um...
36:49Have a long shower.
36:51Who with?
36:52Me, or my brother?
36:54We know you've been bonking both of us.
36:56Don't play a player, mate.
37:06It's like West Side Story.
37:08The two different sides coming together.
37:10Yeah.
37:12I guess it is.
37:14Do you go both ways, then?
37:16Um...
37:16Oh, uh...
37:18I just...
37:20like...
37:20sex.
37:21A lot.
37:22Oh.
37:25I haven't done it yet.
37:27I really want to, though.
37:36All set for the big surprise, team.
37:39Ready for the grand finale?
37:41Mm-hmm.
37:45I can't wait to come and see you tonight.
37:48Tonight can't come soon enough.
37:50Mm-hmm.
37:57James, James.
37:58Right back in the game now.
38:00Running hard.
38:04And he scores!
38:06Yes, he does!
38:08Yes!
38:09Yes!
38:09Yes!
38:09Yes!
38:10Yes!
38:12Yes!
38:19Is Rupert the Daddy, or is it James?
38:24We've been running to the ladies at work.
38:26The men around you may not have realized, but that's men.
38:30Right!
38:31Ready for launch!
38:33Sarah's so excited, she could burst!
38:35Ah, smile!
38:36We're going to be in Tatler.
38:38Okay, thank you.
38:39No, come on, crack your face here, having fun.
38:42Little distance.
38:43That's enough, thank you.
38:44Fuck off.
38:44Let's carry you up, then, Sarah.
38:47We discussed this.
38:48It's really very simple.
38:49It's...
38:50You jump out of the plane, the parachute pops open.
38:52You just float like a little butterfly.
38:55Thrilling!
38:55Down into the field, everyone forwards, lovely, lonely.
39:00Is there a problem?
39:01No.
39:02Come on.
39:06We'll look after her.
39:07Good luck.
39:10Tony!
39:11I'm pregnant.
39:13Huh?
39:13Speak up, woman.
39:14I'm pregnant!
39:18Oh, you are the face of two primetime television shows.
39:21This is hugely mean.
39:24Well, we're going to have to start auditioning for replacements on Monday, then, Deirdre.
39:28Come along, then.
39:29Let's carry you up on the plane.
39:30No!
39:30I can't!
39:32Tony, I can't!
39:35I have four camera crews, twelve photographers, the whole of Raj are waiting for a fucking surprise.
39:40Who's going to jump out the bloody plane, then?
39:51I can't!
39:54What are you doing?
39:59What the hell?!
40:01I can't do it!
40:02All the way!
40:03Oh man!
40:03I can't do it!
40:04I can't do it!
40:04I can't do it!
40:04You're struggling to get hold of him, and he's still there.
40:07Campbell Black going right back, he's going to have the final shot, a goal for him, he's going to score
40:13for Merkley, it's a goal, and that's a goal!
40:24The Joke Jets are winners of the Rock Checkup.
40:45And a lager for Mr. Jones, please. He looks thirsty.
40:51Can you put it in there for me?
40:57I can't stop thinking about you.
41:02Me too.
41:06It's like a beautiful dream I had.
41:25Red Freight! Didn't he do well?
41:29He was wonderful. Well played, Freddy.
41:32Worried he was too tubby for polo.
41:34Hey, that poor horse.
41:37Could you take a picture of us?
41:39Can you give the camera to Mrs. Vericuff?
41:41Okay. I'm not great with these...
41:43No searching for Sharon?
41:45Say cheese.
41:47Cheese!
41:50Lovely.
41:51Come on, you've got Sharon.
41:53You look nice, she looks slim when you stand up, Shane.
41:56Lovely.
41:57What?
41:57Shall we go get them all together?
41:58It's okay.
42:04Lizzie!
42:04No, no, Freddy.
42:06You've walked off of Elle's camera.
42:08Oh, God, sorry.
42:17I think it's best we keep away from each other.
42:23It's gonna be quite hard.
42:25Us being neighbours now and everything.
42:29It's hurting my heart.
42:55It's hurting my heart.
42:56Because?
42:57The day Hermione and I thought would never arrive is finally on the horizon.
43:01After her sterling work for the Spazdix and rebuilding that school in Ghana.
43:06Oh, Ghana.
43:07Our beloved Caroline is getting married.
43:12We are delighted to announce the engagement of our daughter, Caroline Margaret.
43:20Yes.
43:21Yes.
43:22To Mr. Gerald Middleton.
43:25Come up, Gerald.
43:31To Gerald and Muffy, everyone.
43:34To Gerald and Muffy.
43:50It's been a wonderful day for Carinium.
43:52Well, personally, may I say how fabulous it is to have you back at the helm, Tony.
43:56Stronger than ever.
43:57None the worse for my little adventure.
43:59Yes.
44:00And before Carinium's big surprise today, just to confirm for some concerned views,
44:05at home.
44:06This was an accident.
44:08It wasn't due to any foul play.
44:11I slipped on the steps outside Carinium entirely my own fault.
44:14Perhaps I should wear trainers instead of brogues.
44:16Well, thank you for putting all our minds at rest.
44:19Welcome.
44:19And cut.
44:20Terrific, Tony.
44:21Well done.
44:21Excellent.
44:23Thanks, Tony.
44:25Glad we got the truth on record.
44:29No threat of police for me.
44:31No public scandal for you.
44:33Win-win, right?
44:40Hold on, guys.
44:58You stayed ahead of the game.
45:00Mm-hmm.
45:00I did.
45:06There it is.
45:08There it is.
45:10It's fine.
45:11It's fine.
45:11It's fine.
45:12It's fine.
45:14It's fine.
45:15It's fine.
45:16It's fine.
45:16Mikey, Mikey, shoot this.
45:18Right.
45:19Okay?
45:19Roll on the parachute.
45:23Oh, my God.
45:59And finally, to today's Rukshire Cup
46:01at the Hampshire Estates
46:03with this exclusive footage brought to us by Ventura Television.
46:13The match was won by satellite technology mogul
46:16Freddie Jones' Jones Jets
46:17with Mrs. Thatcher's Minister for Sport
46:19Rupert Campbell Black back in action
46:22helping to score the winning goal.
46:24And the behind-the-scenes fiasco
46:26Tony Baddingham didn't want you to see
46:28as a Carinium employee humiliates himself
46:31after crash-landing his parachute into a tree.
46:35Poor chap. I hope he's all right.
46:38In the ITV franchise battle
46:40between television titan Carinium
46:42and the newly formed Ventura Television
46:44it was Ventura who won the day.
46:47What?
46:50May I speak with you, Tony?
46:52Oh, this is getting extremely dull, Sarah.
46:55If you want to keep your job
46:56your little inconvenience needs to be flushed away.
46:59It's yours.
47:04It's your baby, Tony.
47:16I'm scared.
47:21Long day, darling.
47:23What's for dinner?
47:26Um...
47:28I have to admit, today was embarrassing.
47:31No, darling, I'm sorry.
47:32Not for me.
47:33For you.
47:35You let her humiliate you
47:37in front of our friends,
47:40in front of your children.
47:43I defied my father
47:45and my whole family
47:47when I agreed to exchange this house
47:49for your surname, Tony.
47:51There will be no more lies.
47:53Or I will hurt you.
47:56Far more than any mistress ever could.
48:00You want to win so badly.
48:05You make yourself very easy to beat.
48:10Come on, dog.
48:12Come on.
48:21Why didn't you tell me you were Jerry's chum?
48:24I just can't believe it.
48:26We're going to be a proper little gang,
48:28the three of us.
48:29Well, the four of us.
48:30This must be what love does to you.
48:32I'd completely forgotten about David.
48:34He's not mounting Gertrude in the garden.
48:43You should have told me
48:44she was Henry's daughter.
48:45Sorry, Charles.
48:46I wanted to speak to you first.
48:47And tell me you're into Muffy.
48:52I like her.
48:55Do you think it'll work?
48:57Our plan.
48:58Worth a try, isn't it?
49:00I mean, they're very exciting
49:01last two chakras in the world.
49:03I played some chakras in my time.
49:05Thank you, Angel.
49:09We did it.
49:11You did it.
49:13How did you manage to hold you on nerve?
49:16I held on to Rupert
49:18and waited until Tony publicly absolved me.
49:21If he goes to the police now,
49:22he'll just look foolish.
49:24Tony would never let that happen.
49:25We better be careful.
49:26He'll be out for blood.
49:28Glad you got out alive, though.
49:30Wow.
49:31I got out alive,
49:31but without my car or my apartment.
49:35Well, you're coming to live with me.
49:39Pensacombe Court.
49:41You mean that?
49:43Of course.
49:49Mm-hmm.
50:04You know what?
50:04I'll just, um...
50:06I'll be back in a sec.
50:06I'll be back in a sec.
50:21I need to explain.
50:30Cameron came to me for protection.
50:33I had to get her away quickly, keep her safe from Tony,
50:36do the right thing.
50:41I'm trying to behave honorably.
50:46Did you sleep with her immediately,
50:48or did you honorably hold off for one night?
50:50I was already sleeping with Cameron before I kissed you.
50:52Well, then you shouldn't have kissed me.
50:53No, I shouldn't have kissed you.
51:01It's true, what everyone says about you.
51:06You aren't capable of love.
51:12Ty.
51:13Please, get out of my kitchen.
51:36People say that life isn't a fairy tale.
51:40That happy ever after doesn't exist.
51:44But what if you just haven't found the person
51:47who'll give you your happy ending?
51:49It's up to you to give yourself the love you deserve.
51:57However, be prepared.
51:59With love may also come war.
52:02And every war has its casualties.
52:08Welcome home.
52:20It's peculiar.
52:23Dogs?
52:33Get the fuck out of my house.
52:38You know it's only a matter of time before he did Shishi Cameron.
52:42Six days, six weeks.
52:43Hmm.
52:45He might even keep you six months to venture her finally.
52:48Don't get the franchise.
52:49Then he'll kick you out like all the rest.
52:50Why are you here, Tony?
52:53Oh.
52:57I brought you a housewarming present.
53:03I don't need evidence to punish you.
53:07The retribution I had planned will be far more painful.
53:15This is going to be fun.
53:25This is going to be fun.
53:35It's going to be fun.
53:39Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
54:13Oh, oh, oh, oh.
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