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مسلسل Orange Is the New Black مترجم - Episode 7
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00:14The animals, the animals, trap, trap, trap till the cages fall, the cages fall, the day is new, and everyone
00:24is waiting, waiting on you, and you've got time.
00:37Think of all the roads, think of all their crossings, taking steps is easy, standing still is hard.
00:49Remember all their faces, remember all their voices, everything is different, the second time around.
01:03And you've got time, you've got time.
01:45And you've got time, you've got time.
01:55You didn't miss much if it makes you feel any better, except movie night.
01:59We got Joe versus a volcano, that was pretty good, and we got meatloaf twice.
02:04Personally, I think it should be baked, and here they steam it so it gets a little pasty.
02:09Do not tell Red I said that.
02:11I mean, she knows, but she got feelings, just like everybody else.
02:16You know those good mashed potatoes that Red makes from the real potatoes and not the box?
02:20Yeah.
02:20Maybe you could ask about getting some of that served up tonight.
02:24You a girl?
02:25She walks up the menus a week in advance, so think about what I've been through.
02:33I can't promise anything.
02:4826, 27, 28, 28, 30!
02:52Who's the big dog in there?
02:54You ain't having me fast.
02:55Bullshit, boss.
02:56I told you, it can't be done.
02:57Six saltines in 30 seconds?
03:02You are a disgusting animal, okay?
03:05What the fuck?
03:07I mean, which is a quality I greatly admire in a person?
03:10You're in touch with your primal self.
03:13You know, well, my primal self cannot resist a dare, apparently.
03:18Which is also how I ended up with three broken toes, and briefly, chlamydia.
03:24And in prison.
03:26Well, that wasn't so much a dare as it was a deal.
03:31Mr. Webster, pick up extension 414.
03:40Hey, get over here.
03:41You're missing a moment.
03:43Participation will be ending in five minutes.
03:48She must really suck ass.
03:50Oh, man, she was in there for two weeks.
03:51I've taken shits longer than that.
03:56Hey, Kate Winslet.
03:58See any icebergs?
04:02They're back again, Janette.
04:04Come on.
04:05Come on.
04:06This way.
04:08Put that out.
04:13Watch this, girls.
04:14What you gonna do if you catch us?
04:16Only one way to find out.
04:17Go back to your mama.
04:37Janette, push on them off.
05:03Good morning.
05:06Welcome.
05:07Ladies of the whack.
05:09He's taking us to prime or something.
05:12Just close the door, please.
05:22Now, small token of my esteem.
05:26Hey!
05:27Hey, Haley, that's proper.
05:32You talk about this outside.
05:34You never see bear claws again.
05:36Silencio, Mr. Healey.
05:37We're gonna be like Red's lady.
05:38What's her name?
05:39The one that don't talk?
05:39Norma.
05:40We're gonna be like four Normas.
05:43All right, now, business.
05:45I.E., if you will,
05:48the concerns of your fellow inmates.
05:50Mr. Healey,
05:52the pillow that we get for sleeping
05:53is thin like paper.
05:55Sometimes yo necesito two pillows
05:58for ergonomics.
06:00Second pillow.
06:00Write it down.
06:02Okay, first of all,
06:03the high sauce in the commissary
06:05is bullshit.
06:06We want that Thailand sauce,
06:08the one with the rooster on it.
06:10Rooster sauce.
06:11And second of all,
06:12ain't no reason we can't get
06:13Fifty Shades of Grey in the library.
06:15We talked about this, Jefferson.
06:17Fed's not gonna subsidize erotica.
06:19I've got a gummy.
06:21I've got one, too.
06:25Fifty Shades.
06:27I was drunk, my request.
06:29But Maria's straight up
06:30about the pillows.
06:32Pillows again.
06:33Chapman.
06:35You're done?
06:37I don't know.
06:40Okay.
06:42The thing is,
06:43I think that a few basic changes
06:46could drastically improve
06:47the quality of life.
06:48Like clinic hours every week
06:52for preventative health care
06:53and reopening the track
06:55and maybe legal counseling
06:59and the GED program.
07:02Now, I understand that there's a,
07:03there's a mold situation
07:04in the classroom,
07:05but this needs to be addressed.
07:07The inmates down the hill,
07:08they get classes
07:10and they are not getting out
07:11anytime soon.
07:12We are here for shorter stays.
07:14We should be learning
07:15to improve ourselves
07:16as students
07:18or
07:21even teachers.
07:23Something's telling me
07:24she has a teacher in mind.
07:28Chang, you're up.
07:29Okay, Mr. Healy.
07:31Okay.
07:37Lay it on me, Chang.
07:39Okay.
07:45Good.
07:47Got a good list going here.
07:48Some good ideas.
07:49Now, the problem as I see it
07:51is that we have a budget situation.
07:54Now, I can do my best,
07:57but it's going to be hard
07:59for me to do all these things
08:00and still be able to bring donuts
08:02to our meetings every month.
08:08And coffee.
08:11Well, we tried.
08:18What just happened?
08:19You were there.
08:21We finally get an opportunity
08:23to make some improvements
08:24around here.
08:25You want me getting all
08:25Amistad on me, Chapman?
08:26Healy looked like
08:27he gunning for change.
08:29Okay, but what about
08:29your campaign promises?
08:31Everyone say shit
08:32to get elected.
08:33You ain't actually got to do it.
08:34That's politics.
08:35I got a disciplinary board hearing
08:37this week,
08:38which if they don't take away
08:39my good time,
08:40I go home.
08:42Healy said he would write
08:43a letter vouching for me.
08:45I ain't looking to make waves.
08:47Glassy water,
08:48smooth sailing,
08:48right on out of here.
08:50So this whole
08:52whack thing
08:53is basically
08:54bullshit.
08:56Just take the donuts, girl.
09:02Can you believe her?
09:04That college bitch
09:05thinks she can come up in here
09:07and take charge of shit
09:09with her nice teeth
09:10and her peevee
09:11stuck up in the air.
09:12She's got a surprise coming.
09:14Is it a pony?
09:16Just show your child, Lurch.
09:18Don't we care
09:19if it's coming out
09:19of them slit-licking lips.
09:24Did you vote for her?
09:26No.
09:26Did you vote for her?
09:28Who voted for that bitch?
09:29Raise your hand.
09:30Raise it.
09:32That's what I thought.
09:33So I'm going to get
09:34so many shit up in here, y'all.
09:37Chapman is the Judas Iscariot
09:40cozyed on up
09:41to the high priest Healy
09:42and he throws out
09:44my vote,
09:44my vote
09:45that were bestowed
09:46upon me
09:47from my lord
09:47and gives her
09:48all the silver?
09:51So,
09:52in this analogy,
09:54you're Jesus Christ.
09:55I've been betrayed.
09:56I've been betrayed.
09:57In May 300429
10:00to your visitor.
10:02You want all I got water?
10:04What you do is not.
10:07I ain't got water.
10:08There it is.
10:11No.
10:14No.
10:16No.
10:19No.
10:20No.
10:24No.
10:26No.
10:26No.
10:37Oh, gosh.
10:39Oh, no, no.
10:41Uh,
10:43it's gonna be a while.
10:46I'm a little backed up
10:47in here.
10:48Sorry.
11:04We were starting
11:05to think
11:05you deserted us.
11:08I tried making
11:09that coconut cake
11:10myself.
11:12Nikki called it
11:13coconut.
11:15What pain
11:16did you bring down
11:16on her for that?
11:17She was right.
11:19Your cake
11:20is inimitable.
11:24Norma got me
11:25an improve-your-vocabulary
11:26book out of the library.
11:28You gotta keep
11:28the brain cells working
11:29before they die.
11:31To be honest,
11:32there's a few things
11:33I wouldn't mind forgetting.
11:35Norma saw you
11:36in the library.
11:37Bent over a law book
11:39like a boy
11:39hiding a titty magazine.
11:41I got interest
11:42beyond coconut cake.
11:44So does every idiot
11:45in here.
11:47where's my
11:48Mexican vanilla?
11:49Oh.
11:56Everything off the books
11:58lives like
11:59Anne Frank,
12:00no?
12:15Seems like a lot
12:16of trouble.
12:17You get too comfortable.
12:19People take advantage.
12:23You got it under control?
12:26Don't go looking
12:27for miracles,
12:28Claudette.
12:29You and me,
12:30we figured out
12:31how to do time.
12:36Well,
12:36at least it's better
12:37than Shu.
12:39Right?
12:41I mean,
12:42the isolation
12:42must just be terrible.
12:45Or not.
12:46I've never been to Shu.
12:49I've heard that
12:50it can be very loud
12:50down there
12:51with people yelling
12:52at each other
12:52all the time.
12:56When I said
12:57that I'd never been to Shu,
12:58did that make me
12:58sound like an asshole
12:59because obviously I did...
13:00Fuck Chapman.
13:08Here's why the floodlights
13:09went out.
13:12It looks like a rat
13:13got to this.
13:14Ooh,
13:15I fucking hate rats.
13:17My brother had one
13:18when we were growing up.
13:20It's kind of cute,
13:21actually.
13:22I named it Antonio.
13:25I just don't want
13:26to chew up a baby's face.
13:28I named it
13:28fucking face-chewing rat.
13:31You're going to fix
13:31the wire or what?
13:33Yeah, yeah, yeah.
13:37Ah!
13:38Shit!
13:39Did you turn off
13:39the switch?
13:40Not that you
13:40turned off the switch.
13:41Oh, man!
13:43Hey, it's my phone.
13:47So you're back
13:48in the rooms, huh?
13:51I hope they didn't
13:52stick you with the Marco.
13:53I mean,
13:54she's super nice
13:54and everything,
13:55but man,
13:56that breathing machine
13:57can just drive you
13:59bonkers.
14:01You know,
14:02if you want,
14:02I can make you
14:03some earplugs.
14:05I take a little bit
14:06of stuffing
14:07out of a pillow,
14:08and then I just
14:09smoosh it up
14:09in some Vaseline,
14:10and then I wrap it up
14:11in some plastic crap
14:12from the sack lunches.
14:14The rooms is full,
14:15all right?
14:16I'm in the ghetto tonight.
14:18Bet you could still
14:19use them in there.
14:20I'll make you some,
14:21okay?
14:22Yeah.
14:25Jesus fucking shit.
14:28Sorry?
14:31What?
14:35It was you.
14:37What?
14:38The screwdriver what?
14:40Acting all sweet
14:42like a piece of candy?
14:44Nobody's sweet in here
14:45except for a reason.
14:48I don't know
14:48what you're talking about.
14:50Do not fucking
14:51lie to me, bitch.
14:53Do not fucking
14:54insult me
14:55after what you've done
14:56already.
15:05In my defense,
15:07I would just like
15:08to point out
15:08that technically
15:09you did not go down
15:10because of the screwdriver.
15:11Technically,
15:11you went down to shoot
15:12because you got
15:13all up in Caputo's face.
15:14Lady,
15:15we in a tight-ass space
15:16and that bench 140.
15:18You sure technically
15:19is how you want
15:19to handle this shit?
15:23Are you gonna say anything?
15:27I ain't a snitch.
15:34Damn.
15:38See?
15:39This one got the same number
15:40on both ends.
15:41The first time
15:42you play that,
15:43it's called the spinner.
15:43You have to play
15:44the ends and the sides,
15:46both.
15:47Like a no-class girl
15:48lets you use any hole.
15:50Yeah.
16:00These are all the places
16:02I'm gonna travel
16:03when I get out,
16:05starting with
16:07Angawilla.
16:08I read the Orlando
16:09Bloom honeymoon there.
16:11and Courtney Cox
16:12and David O'Kitt,
16:13even though that
16:13didn't work out.
16:14I love the beach,
16:16but I burn like a lobster,
16:18so I'm gonna get
16:19a good swim shirt
16:20and bonus,
16:21it's gonna hide
16:22the Gorb Lettus car.
16:32Oh, yeah.
16:33Come on.
16:35Okay, bitches,
16:37who's first in line
16:38for some poppy lovin'?
16:39Poppy lovin'!
16:44He's so cute.
16:46He looks just like my dog
16:47from when I was a kid.
16:48Except mine was more
16:48of a dachshund,
16:49but the nostril part
16:50is the same.
16:51You look just like
16:52Chummy.
16:53Make him do a trick.
16:56She doesn't know
16:57any yet.
16:57Well, maybe you can
16:58take some time off
16:59from sitting around
16:59eating all day
17:01and teach him something.
17:05Chavin wrote me
17:06three letters
17:07for my case
17:07and it did fuck off.
17:09They ain't letting people out
17:10who hasn't done
17:11the whole time.
17:12Well, I ain't people.
17:13I'm training for this bitch
17:15and I ain't never
17:16coming back neither.
17:17Not like the rest of y'all.
17:19Like Oprah say.
17:20The road less traveled.
17:22You know,
17:23that doesn't mean
17:23what everybody thinks it means.
17:24Ah, shit.
17:25We about to get educated
17:26and shit.
17:27No, no, no.
17:27I'm just saying
17:28that everyone thinks
17:29the poem means
17:30to break away from the crowd
17:30and, like,
17:31do your own thing.
17:32But if you read it,
17:33Frost is very clear
17:34that the two worlds
17:35are exactly the same.
17:36He just chooses one
17:36at random.
17:38And then it's only later
17:38at a dinner party
17:39when he's talking about it
17:40that he tells everybody
17:41he chose the world
17:41less traveled by
17:42but he's lying.
17:47So the point of the poem
17:48is that everyone
17:50wants to look back
17:50and think that
17:51their choices mattered
17:52but in reality
17:53shit just happens
17:54the way that it happens
17:55and it does not
17:56mean anything.
17:59I will probably kill her
18:01in her sleep tonight.
18:02Wake me up
18:03so I can watch.
18:06I'm gonna...
18:08laundry.
18:10You ever notice
18:11how some dog breeds
18:11they sound kind of dirty?
18:13Shit zoo,
18:15cocker,
18:17jack something.
18:19Poodle.
18:22That is good.
18:24I didn't think of that one.
18:25That is very clever.
18:28Hey, you know what guys?
18:29Look at that face.
18:31I'm gonna call her
18:32little boo.
18:32Oh, little boo.
18:34Who's your little boo?
18:35Yes.
18:37Hello?
18:38It's closed.
18:41Alex?
18:46I was just gonna drop this off
18:48but
18:50tomorrow.
18:51Just give it.
18:55Give it to me.
18:58Attention all personnel.
19:00Be advised,
19:00count is not going to be
19:01a police conductor recount.
19:10Do you remember
19:11the four seasons
19:12in the Seychelles?
19:18Gosh, we just threw
19:19our laundry
19:20into the hallway.
19:21It was like
19:2140 bucks
19:22for a pair of pants.
19:33Hey.
19:37I've been thinking
19:38about it.
19:41A lot.
19:45And I just wanted
19:46to let you know
19:47that there are
19:47um
19:47there are no
19:49hard feelings.
19:50I was pretty angry
19:51but
19:53I'm over it.
19:56So
19:57um
20:00friend?
20:03Wow.
20:07That's really
20:08big of you pipes.
20:16It's
20:16a club.
20:17It's
20:17a club.
20:18It's
20:18They
20:19teach
20:19dancing
20:19on the
20:20pylone.
20:21If you want to
20:22become
20:23a
20:24stripteaseer,
20:25wait until I die.
20:26No, it's not
20:27a striptease.
20:28It's
20:29exercise
20:29for
20:30training
20:30for
20:31women.
20:32Of course.
20:33They will tell you
20:36When you wake up in Atlantic City with lies,
20:41I will put the lights in for your peace.
21:05Quiet.
21:07If you sleep with me.
21:10I will win if you find a man who wants me.
21:15Oh, English.
21:22They eat.
21:25English?
21:30You look very pretty in that dress.
21:33Thank you, Sam.
21:35It is very...
21:39blue.
21:47You guys ever notice how once you're a couple,
21:49you pretty much only hang out with other couples?
21:52A guy, a girl, and another guy?
21:55It just looks weird.
21:56People probably just assume you're divorced.
21:59Oh, great. I look divorced.
22:01Which conveys sadness and ex-wife shit and lawyer's fees.
22:06Or I look single.
22:0734 and single.
22:08Which must mean there's just something wrong.
22:11Like you keep large reptiles in tanks.
22:14Or I have a very special relationship with my mother.
22:17I just look...
22:17I look like a loser.
22:19Why don't you switch seats with Pete?
22:21You're okay being a loser.
22:22Right, babe?
22:23I don't want to look like a loser.
22:24Okay.
22:26What am I complaining about?
22:27Right?
22:28I mean, seriously.
22:29You know?
22:29We're sitting here.
22:31We're gonna enjoy some small plates while Piper sits in prison.
22:34You know what?
22:35Fuck Piper.
22:37She's in prison and it sucks.
22:39Let's also stipulate there are children dying of diarrhea in Malawi.
22:43It doesn't mean that we don't get to complain about our lives.
22:45I am pregnant.
22:46And the heat in our apartment is always too high and it gives me nosebleeds and that is happening.
22:51Pete isn't getting laid and he's growing that horrible beard.
22:54You look like a loser.
22:56We're all allowed to feel shitty about things in our lives that are shitty.
23:00And happy about things that are awesome.
23:02Like this awesome beard.
23:04And you'll call them.
23:05What?
23:06That's happening?
23:07Who can resist a felonious fiancé story, right?
23:12Yeah, it's totally happening.
23:14New York Times, baby.
23:15Modern love.
23:16That's huge.
23:17Yeah.
23:18Does Piper know?
23:19Is she cool about it?
23:22I mean, sort of.
23:24Yeah, I mean, she's, uh...
23:26She's sorting out her feelings, I guess, you know.
23:30I'm gonna tell her tomorrow.
23:32You know, now that it's for sure, you know.
23:41Oh, man.
23:51What's up with that, girl?
23:59Shut the fuck up.
24:02I know you ain't fucking with my beauty rest, yo.
24:04Just fucking watch it, man.
24:07They closed the track on me, haters.
24:09I ain't gonna get soft like the rest of y'all.
24:12Look, none of that's gonna matter when they throw your ass in shoe.
24:14Part two.
24:15I got ten minutes before the CO come back around.
24:18Hey, did somebody get this bitch a hamster wheel?
24:21What you gonna do about it, Jemima?
24:24You hear you just call me?
24:26I said, what you gonna do?
24:31Right in the back.
24:33Did you see the film on Coach's face?
24:35He had no idea what happened to him.
24:37You happened to him.
24:39I just ran Coach.
24:40Well, Watson, you just ran yourself into the high school record book.
24:43That gonna help with scholarships?
24:45Your colleges will be fighting over you.
24:47What?
24:48You get dressed.
24:49Okay.
24:50I introduce you around, alright?
24:52Okay.
24:52They all waiting.
25:14You ran good.
25:15You ran good.
25:15I know it.
25:24The universe did you wrong.
25:26Then they took away your track.
25:28I get it.
25:30What you talking about?
25:31You get it.
25:32You're going back to the suburbs, String Cheese.
25:35I was like you once.
25:37Pissed off.
25:39Thought the world owed me something.
25:42It took me a long time to let go of that anger.
25:46Bitch, you lying to yourself with this whole namaste bullshit.
25:49You're a step ahead already.
25:52Channeling your feelings through physical activity.
25:55Which means the mind and body connect.
25:58Who touched you, yo?
26:01Was it your uncle?
26:05Your daddy.
26:07Okay.
26:08You want to project your issues onto me?
26:11That's cool.
26:13But I feel bad for you.
26:16That negative energy is gonna eat you up inside.
26:21Man, you dissed deep in this shit.
26:24You must have done something fucking evil.
26:27Huh?
26:29Why you in here, yo?
26:32Did you kill someone?
26:35You fucked a kid?
26:40You'll kill a kid.
26:51That's what I thought.
26:55Huh?
26:57Huh?
27:01Huh?
27:07Huh?
27:16Chapman, come in.
27:19Or vogliot, as they say in Kiev.
27:21Oh.
27:22Are you planning a vacation?
27:24If I were, it'd be somewhere you drink rum out of a mini volcano.
27:28What can I do for you?
27:30The track.
27:32You know, I once saw this lecture on YouTube called 23 and a Half Hours.
27:36It's one of those things where someone draws on a whiteboard.
27:39And it says that the single...
27:41Well, if the Internet says it, then we better listen up, eh?
27:48How much money does this institution spend on health care per year?
27:53Walking for a half an hour a day reduces the risk of anxiety, arthritis, depression,
27:59things like dementia and diabetes.
28:01It helps with everything.
28:02If you could save money on medical expenses with something as simple as walking,
28:07why wouldn't you?
28:09I mean, in the long term...
28:11No one here gives a crap about the long term, Chapman.
28:15Yo, Preparation H.
28:18Oops.
28:18Sorry.
28:20I'll come back when you're done taking orders.
28:27Sitting around all day is the worst possible thing that you can do for your body.
28:31We're already doing the time.
28:32I've got a deal for you, Chapman.
28:35Caputo thinks a CO has been putting inside photos on the Internet.
28:40But I think that kind of nonsense is too stupid even for a CO.
28:44I don't know what you're asking.
28:47Let's say an inmate is hiding a camera or a cell phone or something,
28:52and you find it for me.
28:54I'll take a look at opening that track.
29:00Prison's a big place, Mr. Healy.
29:02I have confidence in you.
29:24What's with the grin, Bennett?
29:26You got some new silk panties on?
29:30Or what?
29:32You get laid or something?
29:37Oh, shit.
29:39Ha-ha!
29:40Bennett got laid!
29:42Come on, man.
29:43Spill the beans, you fucking pussy monster.
29:46Was she Asian?
29:47No.
29:48Oh.
29:49I hear their shit goes sideways.
29:53Well?
29:54Go ahead.
29:57Okay.
29:58I got laid.
29:59Yes!
30:00I knew it!
30:00I know what you did to me, whore!
30:03Come on.
30:04I couldn't be prouder if I was your dad.
30:08Tell me, man.
30:10What about her tits?
30:12Were they like big floppy fucking milk jugs
30:15or a nice tight little handful?
30:17What was it?
30:22They were fake.
30:24She's half Asian, half Brazilian.
30:30Oh.
30:31She's got this sister.
30:34Come on.
30:36Jesus fucking Christ.
30:41Miss Jefferson, why do you deserve to be released?
30:46Thank you, sir.
30:48Let the record show, I only had three infractions for all my time here.
30:52One was for smacking the bitch for not respecting my ice machine choices.
30:57And, well, the second, they was bullshit.
31:01Also, I ain't never miss a day working in the library.
31:04Don't say working.
31:06Say employ.
31:07The shit sound more elegant.
31:09Also, maybe go easy on the bitch smacking.
31:11Like, don't bring that shit up.
31:14All right.
31:14Uh, Miss Jefferson, what have you learned from your time in prison?
31:18Learned?
31:18I ain't learned nothing.
31:20I came in this motherfucker innocent.
31:22I'm still innocent.
31:23You keep talking about innocent, you're going to slide on back in him
31:25like you got a magnet up your ass.
31:27I ain't do nothing.
31:28Look, me neither, all right?
31:30We all just in here because we took a wrong turn going to church.
31:34Listen, what you did or didn't do, that shit is irrelevant now.
31:38You got to show remorse, fool.
31:39Tell them you met Jesus.
31:40You unseeked the air of your ways.
31:42Now you're going to help the underprivileged youth learn to play chess or whatnot.
31:46You're going to say they don't end up like your sorry ass.
31:48Man, I ain't sorry.
31:50Hey, no, no, no, bitch.
31:51Tell them you're going to college.
31:52Man, where the fuck is?
31:55What you going to major in, Ibanez?
31:57I could be a law secretary.
31:59The shit I learned in my job, I'm like brain man with this shit.
32:02You know, sit your ass down.
32:04It's time to get serious.
32:09What you going to do about your hair?
32:16Okay, you say you do it, but if you get some puta pregnant,
32:20you cut it up and you throw it up and you're going to the fuck,
32:22and no, you don't love me if when you're signing with other women,
32:25you don't use a fuck.
32:28I know you don't use it, okay?
32:31I love you.
32:31I love you.
33:03I love you.
33:26You got to go bounce on daddy's lap?
33:31What did I do now?
33:32Don't be all cute, college.
33:36Have you seen my teeth?
33:38Like, really?
33:39Wow.
33:40They're, um...
33:41Pretty fucked up, huh?
33:42Yeah.
33:44Genetics, mostly.
33:45Oh.
33:46But my cousin, she's doing 15 over at Lexington,
33:49and she got a whole new set
33:51from the United States of America,
33:54D.O.C.
33:57Congratulations.
33:58So it's fine that your teacher's pet and all,
34:00but let's, like, see what you can do.
34:04You want new teeth?
34:09Oh, because of whack.
34:12The thing is, I don't think I can.
34:14It's not even a real thing.
34:15You think you're some kind of special, don't you?
34:17No, I'm serious.
34:18It's a scam, which, when you think about it,
34:19we really all should have seen coming.
34:22But let me tell you something, college.
34:26They're going to treat you nice,
34:27and they're going to use you.
34:30And when you're all used up,
34:33you ain't going to be nothing.
34:37Knock it off, pencil-talkie.
34:40You selling us out?
34:43For what?
34:57Now, if it was me,
34:58I think I'd leave the grunt work to the grunts.
35:02I'll let the girls do this.
35:03Half the potato comes off with the peel.
35:07Seems to me like you're just aching
35:10to put that down for a few
35:12and make me a sandwich.
35:14Not particularly.
35:20Guard hard to C-block.
35:26What kind?
35:28Bologna and cheese.
35:32No mustard.
35:35Double the mayo.
35:38Oh, this...
35:40This is great.
35:45This makes me very happy.
35:51See?
35:53You didn't want to do it at first, right?
35:56But now, I'm happy.
35:58And it's no big deal for you.
36:00What do you want?
36:02I want to be friends.
36:06Friends who take care of each other.
36:10You got boxes coming in with a little something extra.
36:14Maybe your guy gets with my guy
36:16and brings in something extra for me.
36:19No problem.
36:21Just tell me if you want zit cream or, um...
36:24pantyhose.
36:26What my guy sends,
36:27it's, uh...
36:29a little more of a specialty item.
36:32Since when our pill's so special.
36:35Give you 5%.
36:39What am I supposed to do with 5%?
36:42Burn it for heat?
36:44My commissary max is out at 300.
36:47And I got all the toothpaste I need.
36:5010%.
36:52Final offer.
36:55I...
36:58don't...
37:00do...
37:01that...
37:02shit.
37:03This shit, that shit, blue shit, bat shit.
37:06It doesn't matter what...
37:07you do.
37:09It's the doing that makes you dirty.
37:12Don't play games with me, Red.
37:16You got no more moves, Mendez.
37:20This is it, man.
37:24There is nothing here.
37:29You got nothing on me.
37:41I'm sorry, don't.
37:42Come in.
37:47Oh, man.
37:52Guess things just got messy in here.
38:03Everything's been deleted off this phone,
38:04except for these photos.
38:05I know.
38:06People, right?
38:07Well, where was it?
38:08In the trash can.
38:09Where?
38:10I don't know.
38:11I just found it.
38:14You know, I appreciate the fact
38:15that you don't want to snitch on anyone.
38:18The way these inmates treat snitches,
38:20it's ugly.
38:22But if you can't tell me
38:23who owns this phone,
38:26I'm afraid I can't help you with the track.
38:28That is not what you said to me.
38:30You said specifically...
38:31I'm sorry.
38:33I don't know what you heard.
38:35But unless I have a name...
38:41enjoy the phone.
38:45Nice work, Chet.
38:50I'm giving you one more minute to pal,
38:52and then I'm shaving your balls.
38:55You want to check a white girl here?
38:56Look like you took a scalp or some shit.
38:59Yo, yo, you need to get you that Michelle Obama here,
39:01for real.
39:02White folks scared of Obama.
39:04I want to look like Monique from Essence Magazine 2008.
39:09Please, ain't enough relaxing in the world for that bullshit.
39:12Now, what makes you so sure the board is white?
39:14Point.
39:15True.
39:15There'll be brothers on the board.
39:16I'm going to be free at last, yo,
39:18because ain't no black man
39:19going to let a fine black woman such as me
39:22hide her light in jail.
39:24No.
39:24Brothers going to be harder on you
39:26to show he got no bias.
39:27Shit, you better hope for the whiteys.
39:29You'll hope for white women.
39:31Y'all know how they love drinking wine with they friends,
39:33talking about how sad it is
39:34black folks ain't got they fair shakes,
39:36what, giving their housekeepers an extra day off and shit.
39:38Y'all know what I'm saying.
39:40So, you want to look like the black best friend
39:43in the white girl movie.
39:45Oh, right.
39:46Okay, so you got Regina King in Miss Congeniality.
39:49You got Alicia Keys in that Nanny Diaries bullshit
39:53with Scar Jo.
39:55And Regina King in Legally Blonde.
39:58Now, you're not thinking big enough.
40:00What?
40:02Viola Davis.
40:04Ooh.
40:05Eat, pray, love, motherfuckers.
40:07I got to live with this hair, yo.
40:09Do me like Rihanna.
40:11Rihanna when?
40:13She had like 26 hairdos in the past two years.
40:152009, Rihanna.
40:16I got to spell that shit out for you.
40:18Look, everybody's still hating on Chris Brown,
40:19so maybe they'll throw me a bone getting back at that fool.
40:23Beat her bitch down.
40:25If your name Chris Brown.
40:27Beat her bitch down.
40:28I'll put it down.
40:37What the fuck is that?
40:39Litchfield won.
40:40Pussy Shutterbug zero.
40:42You put a straw in coffee?
40:44I just had my teeth bleached.
40:47Where was it?
40:48He only found it.
40:50Good to know someone around here's on his game.
40:53He found it?
40:55You're buying that?
40:57No contest?
40:58What, you think Keeley's running around here like a Fred boy
41:00taking pictures of Snatch?
41:03I think we should look into it.
41:04Seems kind of irrelevant now, don't you think?
41:10We both know you're after my job, Joe,
41:12but I'm not worried, never have been, know why?
41:15Because you get mired down in pettiness
41:18instead of stepping your shit up.
41:21Nice haircut, by the way.
41:39Thanks.
41:40Sure.
41:42I keep feeling like I know you from somewhere.
41:45You didn't go to Smith, did you?
41:49Cabin High Wildcats?
41:51Nope.
41:52You know, I lived in Red Hook for a while after college.
41:56Oh, I used to bag groceries at Fairway.
41:58No way!
41:59Oh my God, I remember you.
42:02You were always forgetting your cloth bags
42:03and I would pack everything in paper
42:05and then you'd remember
42:06and get the bags out of your purse
42:07and make me repack everything.
42:08Oh boy.
42:09Yeah, I guess that did happen a couple times, huh?
42:11Every time.
42:12For months.
42:14You were a pain in the ass.
42:15Yeah.
42:16Who could thunk we'd end up here, huh?
42:20Anyway, I just want you to know
42:22that as far as I'm concerned,
42:24you and me are the same.
42:26Pardon?
42:27The only difference between us
42:29is when I made bad decisions in life,
42:30I didn't get caught.
42:31It could have been me hearing khaki easy.
42:35Thank you for saying that.
42:38You know, it's really nice to know
42:40that there's somebody on our side.
42:43No.
42:46You know what would really help
42:48to boost morale around here?
42:54I saw that bitch
42:55headed on over to Healy's office.
42:57Looking guilty as fuck.
43:00This sucking dick's a little easier
43:02than honest hard work.
43:04I feel sorry for her.
43:08You're right, Leanne.
43:10Compassion is what we got over the monkeys.
43:14You know what, though?
43:16Compassion ain't gonna help this girl
43:18learn the way of things.
43:19I learned.
43:20We all learned.
43:21And that is that you have to get broken down
43:24to get raised back up.
43:25You know, I'm with you, hon.
43:29Really.
43:30She's waspy and entitled
43:32and always asking if you have this in whole grain.
43:35She's got the Bambi shit going on.
43:36I get all of it.
43:37But I'm gonna need you
43:38to shut the fuck up about her
43:41and get over your shit.
43:44Or what?
43:45What?
43:47What?
43:52Or I will fuck you.
43:55Literally.
43:58I will sneak into your bunk
43:59in the middle of the night
44:00and I'll lick your pussy.
44:03And I will do it so good
44:05and so soft
44:06that you're gonna be on the edge of calming
44:07by the time you wake up.
44:09And then I'll stop.
44:12And you'll be half asleep
44:13and you'll beg for it.
44:15Oh, you'll beg for it.
44:17And maybe I'll be nice
44:19and maybe I won't.
44:21But if I am nice,
44:23the things you feel,
44:26it will ruin you forever.
44:31So, you know,
44:34choose.
44:39and exhale slowly
44:45and float all the way down.
44:54Halfway up.
44:59And now,
45:01go all the way down again.
45:07Bent at the waist
45:09and let the arms hang.
45:16And continue to breathe
45:19breathe and
45:19hang.
45:37Hey, what up?
45:46Hi.
45:46You got a minute?
45:47My man 3D wants to chat.
46:04Hold your head up,
46:15you only got your life
46:16You got track and field girl, right?
46:19Yeah.
46:23You can't be here, yo.
46:25Little Frank told me to come on by.
46:26Little Frank
46:27is not a forward thinker.
46:35Look around you.
46:37What you see?
46:39A party.
46:42People.
46:42What kind of people?
46:46Your crew.
46:48Your crew.
46:48My crew?
46:50We thugs.
46:53We ain't finished school.
46:55We got what we got
46:56until the next bust.
46:58You look like you're doing okay to me.
47:00And if my teachers could see you now,
47:02they'll take your head
47:03cause you probably wouldn't be here.
47:04You're the real thing.
47:06You feel me?
47:08Everything we playing at,
47:09everything we holding,
47:10you can have it.
47:12For real.
47:14You want to fuck that up?
47:15That's on you.
47:17I can't carry that.
47:21Yo, Richie.
47:27Make sure she gets home.
47:29You need money for sneakers
47:30or whatever.
47:32Give me a shout.
47:38I know where the door is.
47:53What up, Rocket girl?
47:56I got booted, that's what.
47:58Well, 3D got his own ideas about right and wrong, like he robbing the hood or something.
48:05And who are you?
48:06You want to party? I'm the brother that's not going to stop you.
48:13You know, you got those thick thighs on you, girl, like, look good on a woman.
48:21I usually go running in.
48:24Now that dress, it's not doing you any favors.
48:31For sure.
48:43Dude, $3 tip on a $67 tab?
48:46Is 70 your lucky number or something? What is that?
48:50D-bag.
48:55What do you have?
48:58This?
49:00I'm buying you a drink.
49:05Uh, margarita?
49:08Okay.
49:16Let me ask you something.
49:19Do I seem pathetic to you?
49:22Before or after you ask that question?
49:25This is my first time out by myself.
49:29First time in a long time.
49:31I mean.
49:32And, uh, I just don't want to be, you know, that guy.
49:44That guy?
49:46That guy's worth about $75 million.
49:50Yeah.
49:51He writes, like, action movies about robots that turn into other robots or something.
49:55And he tips well.
49:59You're doing just fine.
50:06Cheers.
50:07And to you.
50:15So what's your story?
50:21Jesus Christ.
50:23What?
50:24What's my story?
50:27I'm sorry.
50:27Did I piss you off?
50:28No, you...
50:30Yes.
50:32Yes, I'm pissed off.
50:34Because you...
50:36You're gorgeous.
50:38Your mouth is amazing.
50:40Your neck...
50:41My God, your ass looks great in those jeans.
50:43No offense, I'm sorry.
50:44I just...
50:46And I feel shitty for even looking at you because...
50:49I have a fiance.
50:53And you know what else I can't do?
50:56Look at her.
50:58Because she's in fucking prison.
51:01Yeah.
51:02Yeah, because she did something stupid and crazy and...
51:08Indicative of an ominously shaky moral compass.
51:13And as a result, I am stuck here alone at this bar,
51:16talking to you and enjoying it and feeling like an asshole.
51:22Polly was right.
51:23Fuck her.
51:34I'm gonna be in the New York Times.
51:52I'm gonna be in the New York Times.
51:55Her request.
51:56Apparently there's some...
51:58Film thing going around 23 hours or whatever says how...
52:03Exercise saves us bucks in the long term.
52:07Which appeals to you because you're chief bean counter now, right?
52:12Uh...
52:12Fig is gonna eat that shit up.
52:15You come up with this in a vision or something?
52:18It was all Fisher.
52:20Trust the woman, right?
52:23Doesn't threaten me to admit it.
52:25That is one smart piece of ass.
52:283-9-1-2.
52:293-9-1-2 to Sergeant.
52:31Go ahead.
52:34Watch this.
52:34Slippery.
52:36No, no, no, no, no.
52:38No, no, no.
52:39No, no, no, no, no.
52:47No, no, no, no, no.
52:58Jesus Christ, Flores.
53:06Man, that was the only place in this prison I could take a shit.
53:12Fucking Jesus.
53:1614 requests in gate A.
53:1815 requests in gate A.
53:27Make them wait, it ain't gonna help.
53:43I have to see Miss Jefferson.
54:03You see that nigga face, yo?
54:05Some motherfucker got so much beard he ain't seen his own face since high school.
54:09Ain't no Islam, he a Sikh, you racist.
54:13Hit the corner, hit the corner, we're gonna lose him at the corner.
54:18Wait up, yo!
54:19Come on!
54:20I said, wait up!
54:21Don't be showing off!
54:24Put your hands where I can see him.
54:27Get down on the ground.
54:29Get down on the ground!
54:32Get down on the ground!
55:06This don't make us see this.
55:11No, it's valid for many of the rules of another one.
55:26Thanks for having us.
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