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00:29I'll see you next time
00:58I'll see you next time
01:29I'll see you next time
01:58I'll see you next time
02:23I'll see you next time
02:34I'll see you next time
02:43I'll see you next time
03:10Chaps entitled a few civil words from a contemporary
03:12Jowett you think I'm Chief Inspector Jowett
03:45the Monsian what do they call you at school
03:47the teachers are the kids
03:49the contemporaries are the kids
03:50I was known as Ted
03:51nothing more exotic than Ted
03:55our Chief Inspector went to a very superior school
03:57he was known as Penguin
03:59hey Garth I'd rather you didn't call me that if you don't mind
04:02just as you wish old chap it's a deuce long time ago
04:0640 years ago 40 years near enough
04:07but a damn fine school
04:09one of the best
04:10six of the best if you misbehave
04:14but I'm not entirely sure that going back there is a good idea
04:19thank you why not school's still there
04:22school's still there
04:22oh Flogger Page has passed on of course
04:48Flogger Page
04:49if the boys have gone down
04:50who will cook Brecker
04:52what are you going to do for fags
04:54what will we do oh boy
04:55oh come on now oh chum
04:58I'm not at all sure that I can come
05:01it's good of you to look me up
05:03but for my sins
05:04I have the most demanding job
05:07in Scotland Yard
05:08there is no one capable of stepping into these shoes
05:11even for a weekend
05:12besides I'm not entirely sure
05:15that I like reunions
05:16all those faces one can't put a name to
05:19my dear Joey
05:21I know exactly what you mean
05:23no no but you don't understand
05:24oh this isn't going to be a full reunion
05:27strictly by invitation
05:29oh
05:29just a few fellows
05:31you and I would enjoy meeting again
05:33no no chaps
05:34like yourself
05:36who are resident to the pinnacles of their profession
05:39if you follow me
05:40ah
05:41it's to be by selection
05:43is it
05:45emphatically
05:47cove that's in with Joey
05:49what's his name
05:51Haygarth he said
05:52why do you know him
05:53oh his face look familiar
05:56Haygarth
05:56no
05:57don't ring a bell
05:59well it shouldn't
05:59not in Scotland Yard anyway
06:01he's a Peter Shamian
06:03blimey
06:04what's that
06:04said he went to school with Joey
06:07somewhere I've never heard of
06:09Petersham
06:09look it up
06:11when I was a lad
06:12I served a term
06:14fine seat of learning
06:15second to none
06:16among the more selective public schools
06:19couldn't let you miss your reunion sir
06:22and I polished up the handle
06:24of the big front door
06:38anyone above
06:48I say
06:49anyone above
06:57which door
06:59my wonder
07:14pegwoods
07:15they seem to have an answer
07:16get off
07:18get off
07:19black hooligans
07:22it's wonderful to see you
07:25all right into our little ambush
07:27just like the old days
07:28you blackguards
07:29who the devil is
07:30now them penguin
07:32you're supposed to be a bobby
07:34let's see if you can name your assailants
07:36this is outrageous
07:37stop with me
07:39I'll make it easy
07:45a horse
07:47a horse
07:50my kingdom
07:52for a horse
07:53get it
07:55that this too
07:57too solid flesh
08:00would melt
08:01throw
08:02and resolve itself
08:04into a dew
08:05but soft
08:08what light
08:10through yonder window
08:11breaks
08:11it is the east
08:13and Juliet
08:15is the sun
08:17that's
08:18quite all right
08:19I'm sorry
08:20I disturbed you
08:21gentlemen
08:23he thinks we're loony
08:24look here
08:25I'm pen
08:27pen
08:29inky pen
08:30good lord
08:32Montague pen
08:34of the Lyceum
08:36really
08:37you actually became an actor
08:40oh actor manager
08:40in fact
08:41we've all been promised tickets
08:42now
08:43let us see
08:44if you can get me
08:45watch
08:46this
08:48oh
08:49oh boy
08:50I say
08:50killer
08:52killer
08:53Partridge
08:54Dr. Partridge
08:55now
08:56really
08:57you
08:58the school bully
09:00became a doctor
09:01a consultant
09:02if you don't mind
09:03incredible
09:04I'll keep away
09:05from your consulting room
09:07that is no way
09:07to speak of a fellow
09:08Peter Shamian
09:09you deserve it
09:11killer
09:11you're still up
09:12to your vicious tricks
09:13I've learnt a few
09:13new ones
09:14archer
09:15this
09:15a gentleman
09:16is the station master
09:18of an important
09:18London terminus
09:19he also gives
09:20realistic impressions
09:22of terrains
09:23I find this
09:26all rather
09:27juvenile
09:28has anyone else
09:30arrived
09:31well
09:31Hagar's here
09:32somewhere
09:32decent of him
09:34to organise this
09:34don't you
09:35oh well
09:35he always put
09:36the school
09:37first
09:38unquestionably
09:39the outstanding
09:40man of our
09:40generation
09:41a hundred
09:42against the
09:43masters
09:44Victor
09:44Le Dorem
09:45scholarship to
09:46Balliol
09:47you know
09:48I don't mind
09:49admitting
09:49that I envied him
09:50when he was
09:51picked to give the
09:51Latin a Russian
09:52and found his day
09:53he was faultless
09:55blast him
09:57Irving himself
09:58could not have
09:59bettered it
09:59Irving
10:01Irving
10:01I don't remember
10:03him
10:03was he in our
10:04year
10:06you know
10:07the place looks
10:08smaller to me
10:09somehow
10:10but the smell's
10:11the same
10:12that
10:14is the smell
10:15of fear
10:16oh come
10:17I mean it
10:18we all spent
10:20our time here
10:20in a state
10:21of
10:22unmitigated
10:23terror
10:23even you
10:25oh for heaven's
10:26sake
10:26terror of what
10:27the flogging
10:28blob
10:29the ushers
10:30the monitors
10:31roastings
10:32dunkings
10:35matron
10:36that woman
10:38yes
10:38oh I still
10:40have nightmares
10:41oh gentlemen
10:42let us not
10:44forget that
10:44there were
10:45compensations
10:46after all
10:46we all got
10:47a capital
10:48start in life
10:49and look at us
10:50now
10:50famous actor
10:51manager
10:51harley street
10:53consultant
10:53station master
10:54of a famous
10:55london turban
10:56and uh
10:58chief inspector
10:59of scotland yard
11:00and that doesn't
11:01even include
11:01hayguards
11:03yes
11:04petersham
11:05was a first
11:06class school
11:07still is I hope
11:08not quite as
11:10good as it was
11:11I imagine
11:12it doesn't need
11:13scotland yard
11:14training to detect
11:15signs of a
11:15certain relaxation
11:16of discipline
11:17quite frankly
11:18this dormitory
11:19is a pigsty
11:20I am inclined
11:22to agree
11:22oh dear
11:24haven't you met
11:25matron
11:26matron
11:27this is mr.
11:28jowett
11:28I need hardly
11:29tell you
11:30that he doesn't
11:31speak for the
11:32rest of us
11:32well I came to
11:34inform you
11:35that dinner will
11:35be served at
11:36eight
11:36oh capital
11:37matron
11:37but since you
11:38feel so strongly
11:39about the state
11:40of the dormitory
11:41mr. jowett
11:41it would oblige
11:43me if you
11:43would replace
11:44the pillows
11:44on the beds
11:45they were
11:46freshly laundered
11:47for you
11:48quite right
11:49matron
11:49and as for
11:50the rest of
11:50you
11:51do something
11:52about those
11:53feathers
11:56sarge
11:57sarge
11:58here
11:58sarge
11:59that haygar
12:00bloke
12:00I remember
12:01where I saw
12:01him
12:01it was when
12:02I was in
12:02P division
12:03about ten
12:03years back
12:04the Norwood
12:04swindles
12:05he was sent
12:05down for six
12:06months
12:06he's a well
12:07known shark
12:07sarge
12:08you sure
12:09what was the lay
12:10oh the underground
12:10railway dodge
12:11he was telling
12:12old ladies
12:12he could bribe
12:13the metropolitan
12:13railway company
12:14not to tunnel
12:15under their
12:15houses
12:15he got three
12:17hundred pounds
12:17from a mrs
12:18asslesmith
12:19and two hundred
12:19from miss
12:20alleywell next
12:20door
12:23well there is
12:23no underground
12:24in Norwood
12:25oh that was
12:25the clever
12:26part sarge
12:26he was telling
12:27them it was
12:27all going on
12:28down below
12:29under their
12:29foundations
12:30he got some
12:30of the old
12:31souls really
12:31worried
12:32lying on the
12:32floor with
12:33their ears
12:33pinned to the
12:34ground
12:35you sure
12:35this was
12:36this agarth
12:37it's him sarge
12:40fancy him
12:41going to
12:41school with
12:41mr. jowett
12:44it's difficult
12:44to credit
12:46our chief inspector
12:48taken in by
12:48a common
12:49sharp
12:53you better
12:53take a look
12:54at petersham
12:56first thing
12:57in the morning
13:03and the health
13:04of a school
13:05can be measured
13:06by the success
13:06of its pupils
13:07in later
13:08life
13:08I venture
13:09to say
13:10that tonight's
13:10distinguished
13:11company
13:12is ample
13:12testimony
13:13to the quality
13:14of education
13:14in petersham
13:16to the quality
13:17of life
13:18in petersham
13:19with the holy
13:20scriptures
13:20as our precepts
13:21and regular
13:22games for the
13:23building of
13:23manly attitudes
13:24and strong
13:25bodies
13:28matron's a bit
13:29young
13:30for the job
13:31quite a pretty
13:32filly though
13:33eh
13:34so is the head
13:36eh
13:37but I am not
13:38on my feet
13:39to make a speech
13:40so without more
13:41ado I propose
13:42to introduce
13:42the man who
13:43made this occasion
13:44possible
13:44an outstanding
13:46example
13:47of the enduring
13:48spirit of
13:48petersham
13:49over the years
13:50captain of the
13:51school
13:51here we go
13:54hey God's
13:55in the limelight
13:56again
13:56when was he
13:57ever out of
13:58Mr. Russell
14:00Hagar
14:00good old
14:03hey God
14:04hello please
14:05please gentlemen
14:06headmaster
14:08mention
14:09old petersham
14:11I note that
14:12amongst this
14:12distinguished
14:13gathering
14:14tonight
14:14there are
14:15men of
14:15eminence
14:16from the
14:16spheres of
14:17medicine
14:18transportation
14:19stage
14:20and law
14:22and order
14:23and I think
14:25I can assure
14:25you headmaster
14:26that your
14:27hospitality
14:27will be
14:28suitably
14:29acknowledged
14:29now I propose
14:30to mark this
14:31reunion
14:31by instituting
14:33a fund
14:33the old
14:34petershamian
14:35fund
14:35to be at
14:36the disposal
14:36of the
14:37school
14:38and we
14:39gentlemen
14:40we
14:42tonight
14:42shall all
14:44contribute
14:44to this
14:45fund
14:47and be
14:47proud to
14:48contribute
14:48generously
14:49as a mark
14:50of our
14:51gratitude
14:51to our
14:53school
14:53so
14:55headmaster
14:56gentlemen
14:56to start
14:57it off
14:57here is
14:58my check
14:59for 25
15:00guineas
15:09I think
15:09it was
15:10bad form
15:11Hagarth
15:11starting
15:12a fund
15:12without
15:12even
15:13mentioning
15:13it to
15:14the rest
15:14of us
15:14first
15:15I mean
15:15after all
15:1625 guineas
15:17is a lot
15:18of tin
15:18can't you
15:19raise it
15:20archer
15:20you little
15:21squat
15:22that's
15:22not the
15:23point
15:23he's
15:24right
15:24it's
15:24the
15:24principle
15:25you ought
15:26to have
15:26mentioned
15:26it to
15:27us
15:27first
15:27I agree
15:28Hagarth
15:29put us
15:29in a
15:29very
15:30difficult
15:30position
15:32did
15:32someone
15:33mention
15:33my name
15:33hello
15:34Hagarth
15:35Joe it
15:35was just
15:36saying
15:36what an
15:36infernal
15:37liberty
15:37it was
15:38offering
15:38other
15:38people's
15:39money
15:39to
15:40the
15:40school
15:40I said
15:41no such
15:42thing
15:42I hope
15:43I didn't
15:44embarrass
15:44any of you
15:45of course
15:45not
15:45I mean
15:46if anyone's
15:47come without
15:47the ready
15:47a check
15:48would do
15:48or an I
15:48owe you
15:49no hurry
15:50anyway
15:50as long as
15:51you all
15:51stump up
15:52by tomorrow
15:52night
15:53what's the
15:54programme
15:54for tomorrow
15:55I thought
15:56we might
15:56all get
15:57a little
15:57exercise
15:57hey
15:59some of you
15:59look as
16:00how you
16:00can do
16:00with it
16:00hey
16:02I'm turning
16:03in now
16:03goodnight
16:04you chance
16:07don't sound
16:08really odd
16:08about that
16:09sir
16:09isn't he
16:10sleeping
16:10with us
16:11got a room
16:11to himself
16:12up the
16:12corridor
16:13organiser's
16:14perks
16:15come in
16:19ah
16:21matron
16:21I believe
16:22the bedtime
16:23cocoa
16:23is a
16:24tradition
16:24yes
16:25and we
16:25value
16:26our
16:26traditions
16:27thank you
16:28matron
16:29any chance
16:30of a spoon
16:31you've got one
16:33not the sort
16:34of spoon
16:34I mean
16:35I beg your
16:36pardon
16:37really
16:37I do
16:38apologise
16:39madam
16:39too much
16:41claret
16:42I suspect
16:42goodnight
16:44gentlemen
16:44goodnight
16:45matron
16:45goodnight
16:46mate
16:46just like
16:47old times
16:48good old
16:49traditions
17:10for heaven's sake
17:12pen
17:12come on
17:13get into bed
17:14just a moment
17:14I've got
17:16something else
17:17in mind
17:19now then
17:21he said
17:23the flog of
17:24page was
17:25dead
17:25because
17:27I propose
17:28to
17:29beach the
17:29billet
17:30within an inch
17:32of his life
17:56out of me boy
17:58I get to the flogging block
18:00I'm going to
18:00patch you
18:10well
18:11I thought this building
18:12had been emptied of little boys
18:15out of my way
18:17apparently I was mistaken
18:20Sarge
18:21Mr. Jarrett ain't gonna like this
18:23been told he's been taken in by a confidence trickster
18:25he'd like it even less if he was duped
18:27I don't know for sure if Agar's trying to pull anything
18:29Thackeray it's our moral duty to speak to Jarrett
18:32besides I want to see his old school for myself
18:36no offence taken on my power chaps none at all
18:40though a matron would appreciate it if you kept it quiet from the head
18:44not much sense of humour
18:47as far as I'm concerned Inky
18:48jolly good shape
18:49what a marvellous disguise
18:52I say
18:53what about dressing up again tonight
18:54think we'd have a bit of a concert
18:57good man
18:58good man
18:58now then
18:59about this morning
19:00I thought we'd all get a bit of fresh air into our lungs
19:03and I thought of a spiffing way to do it
19:06come on Hans
19:07here Sarge
19:12look at this
19:12some eccentric I suppose
19:14oh I'm not so sure
19:16oh blimey
19:18penguin
19:18oh we shouldn't be here
19:20that's all right or something
19:21I wouldn't miss this for the world
19:23good day sir
19:24hey
19:25I say good day to you sir
19:30it's an argent crib
19:31it can't be true
19:33was this a paper chase
19:35energetic sport for a sedentary man
19:38what the devil are you doing here
19:40just two hounds on the censer
19:42not yours
19:43chasing another hare
19:44name of haygarth
19:45what
19:47haygarth
19:47you better explain that
19:49I think your friends are coming sir
19:51oh blast
19:53let me help
19:54give me the bag
19:56hey
19:56and grand
19:58can he help
20:00oh ho ho ho
20:01oh ho ho ho
20:05oh ho ho ho
20:06what are we doing
20:07you can make stage
20:08give it up
20:09this is ridiculous
20:11this is ridiculous
20:13I know
20:13Charlie was much of a runner
20:17he must have stopped for a drink
20:19sensible fellow
20:21aye
20:21nice heads
20:23we've got it
20:23have a word for the lamp
20:25Which I say, my men?
20:27He's in a trap.
20:29Light shorts, white zephyr.
20:31Carry your bag.
20:32Went straight past a good 20 minutes ago.
20:34He was going like a steam engine.
20:36Oh, that's it, then.
20:38We shall never catch him now.
20:40The trail appears to be in here.
20:43Ah, yes, well, he went out of paper,
20:45but he went in that direction.
20:47Come on, let's hunt.
20:48This is far enough for me.
20:51Oh, damn it.
20:52Yes. I say, would you credit it
20:54no money for a drink?
20:56You're no longer game, Partridge.
20:58I'm a sip of mine. You look as though you need it.
20:59Oh, thanks, sir. You're a brick.
21:04May I?
21:05Finish it up. I say, if you chaps are keeping me up,
21:08you'd better say, sir.
21:09Can I get you gentlemen another gauze?
21:11Oh, thanks, Hawthorne.
21:14We're giving up the chase.
21:16To hell with the lot of you!
21:19Anyhow!
21:22Hare and hounds at our age.
21:24It was absurd.
21:26Hagar suggested it.
21:28Not just to show he can still run, if you ask me.
21:30Blasted show-off.
21:32I hate the man, and that's the truth.
21:35That's a bit strong, Archer, old fellow.
21:38I'm serious.
21:40If you must know,
21:43he seduced my wife.
21:46Good Lord.
21:48Seventeen years ago.
21:51That's before I became a station master.
21:54I had a less exalted position
21:56in the booking office at Victoria Station.
21:59You meet a lot of people like that.
22:02One day,
22:04Hagar appeared at the window.
22:06Well, naturally, I made myself known to him.
22:09We arranged a meet for a drink.
22:12Well, he seemed a good company.
22:14No, he always was.
22:16So, as he was at a loose end,
22:17I invited him home for a meal
22:20and introduced him to my wife.
22:23Oh.
22:25I didn't see him for several months after that.
22:28Until one day,
22:30he walked up to the booking office window
22:33and purchased a ticket for Penge.
22:36Penge?
22:38That's where I live.
22:40Oh, dear.
22:42I saw him once or twice a week after that.
22:46Always in the morning.
22:47Just after I'd come on duty.
22:52Well,
22:53you know the rest.
22:57He was...
22:59visiting your wife.
23:00on a ticket issued by me.
23:04Oh, it was always first class.
23:07Well, the ticket, I mean.
23:12Unspeakable.
23:13Peter Schombare.
23:15What did you do about it?
23:17Well, nothing.
23:18I had no idea what was going on.
23:21Constance didn't tell me.
23:23Until last week.
23:25When Hagar turned up again
23:27and invited me here.
23:29His visit seemed to upset her.
23:33And after he'd gone,
23:35she confessed this shameful secret
23:38she'd been keeping from her for 17 years.
23:41But she was still decided to come up here.
23:44To speak to Hagar, man to man.
23:46Oh, yeah.
23:49This is a bit of a facer, Partridge.
23:53Puts a blight on the whole weekend.
23:56I must say.
23:59Don't feel much like giving a performance this evening after this.
24:02Please, it's all right.
24:04I'd rather you forgot this conversation.
24:06Let's change the subject.
24:07You gentlemen entertain us, then?
24:08Oh, pure amateurs.
24:10Well, most of us.
24:11We're having a reunion up at the school.
24:14We'll sing a few songs.
24:15Do the odd comic turn.
24:16And I shall give my Romeo.
24:18And us.
24:19You're not musicians or anything of that sort, are you?
24:22Well, he can play the spoons.
24:24And he does monologues.
24:25Capital!
24:37Mr. Hagar.
24:39Do you require any assistance this evening?
24:41No, thank you, Headmaster.
24:43That is to say, it will be of assistance enough
24:45if you honor us with your presence at the concert tonight.
24:48Oh, I shall be there, depend upon it.
24:51And if matron's playing is a foretaste, I shall enjoy myself.
24:56Oh, we have treats in store for you, sir.
24:59Mr. Penn, being a distinguished member of the acting profession, as you know, sir, is directing proceedings.
25:06An actor, most fortuitous.
25:09I really must make a point of speaking to some of the visitors.
25:13I am somewhat reserved by nature, Mr. Hagar.
25:18But matron, I am sure, has welcomed you as only she can.
25:23Affirmative, Headmaster.
25:30Affirmative, Headmaster.
25:56I think I should advise you, Headmaster,
25:58that I've received information that Mr. Hagarth
26:00is not all that he seems.
26:03Oh, very good.
26:04Yes, I can see that.
26:08I think we should all be wary of him.
26:11Oh, I don't know.
26:13The other one looks more dangerous to me.
26:15I don't seem to be making myself clear.
26:18I'm very concerned that Mr. Hagarth
26:20may be planning something of an underhand character.
26:25An impersonation of me, perhaps?
26:28I do have a sense of humour, sir.
26:39Lois!
26:40Poor Yorick!
26:42I knew him, Horatio.
26:45A fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy.
26:49He hath borne me on his back a thousand times.
26:52And now, how abhorred in my imagination it is.
26:56My gorge rises at it.
26:59Here, hung those lips that I have kissed.
27:04I know not how often.
27:07There be your jibes now.
27:11Feel positive I've seen that fellow somewhere before.
27:14At the hostel this morning.
27:17Ah, yes, of course.
27:20Bend over, boy!
27:23Don't you hear me?
27:26Sorry, sir.
27:27Wax in my ear.
27:29Bend over!
27:31Here's wax on your rear.
27:36If you please, sir.
27:38If you please, sir.
27:40All this time!
27:45You're wasting your time.
27:46How's that?
27:50I've been sensitive to pain!
27:54You'll not hear me cry out.
27:57You're right, boy!
27:59Bend over!
28:00I've got wax in my ear!
28:02And thousands of men since 1810 have graced the fighting game.
28:08But when all's said and done, remember one gentleman.
28:18Cribbs the name.
28:25I feel certain that we've met somewhere before.
28:28I mean, even a monologue.
28:29Oh, it's very well known, sir.
28:32Oh, it is.
28:33Oh.
28:34Well, Ed Master, Major, and old Peter Shamians, what a night to remember, eh?
28:43Oh, what a night!
28:45Well, I feel sure that I speak on behalf of us all in thanking our two visitors for bringing their
28:51original talents to our school tonight.
28:56And now, fellow Peter Shamians, the time has come to demonstrate our loyalty, our devotion, our pride in this unique
29:06institution known as Petersham School.
29:09Gentlemen, kindly place your donations in this cricket cap, which I wore more years ago than I care to count
29:17in the match against the Masters, hmm?
29:19For the Petersham Fund, gentlemen, 25 a head, I think we feel, hmm?
29:23Guinness?
29:24But if anyone is feeling more generously inclined, well, make it more by all means, hmm?
29:35How much did you put in the hat, Penguin?
29:38In the first place, my name is not Penguin, and in the second place, whatever I did donate is no
29:44business of yours.
29:45Well, there must have been over a hundred pounds altogether.
29:47Haygarth was going off to count it.
29:49The head should have taken it there and then.
29:53I don't trust Haygarth anymore.
29:56You may rest easily, gentlemen.
29:59Scotland Yard has an eye on things.
30:02So if Haygarth tries to do a bunk with the money, we grab him.
30:06You got it.
30:08What makes you think he'll try tonight?
30:10Might be tomorrow.
30:12He won't want to hang around.
30:13He's recognised me.
30:15Oh, I see.
30:17Yeah, perhaps he won't try at all.
30:19What'll we do out here all night if he don't appear?
30:22I could do another monologue.
30:25Hmm, capital.
30:25Where the deuce is our trap.
30:30Oh, leave him alone.
30:32He's got troubles enough.
30:40Cocoa, gentlemen.
30:42Mate.
30:43And I do want to thank you for a most agreeable evening.
30:46Thank you, Matron.
30:47It would not have been possible without your assistance on the Piano Forte.
30:52You have a delightful touch.
30:55You're very, very kind.
30:56Ah, there you are, Mr. Archer.
30:58You nearly missed your cocoa.
31:00Oh, sorry, Matron.
31:00Did I delay you?
31:02Not at all.
31:03Does it need warming up?
31:05No, but Haygarth does.
31:07No, no, it's fine.
31:08Thank you, Matron.
31:09Ah, well, then I hope we can all get a peaceful night's rest.
31:14A free from disturbances.
31:40Quiet house at last.
31:42I don't think there's any danger of our being disturbed tonight, Russell.
31:50Bloody hell.
31:52Come on, then.
31:54Where's the...
31:55What?
31:55What was that?
31:58The matron.
31:59The matron.
32:00Haygarth's room.
32:01Come on.
32:02Quick, come on.
32:04This way.
32:09Good God.
32:12Upstairs.
32:15Quickly.
32:17Get me started.
32:18Get him out of there.
32:18Get him out of there.
32:19Run there, Archer.
32:21Further up.
32:23What in the name of...
32:25Shh, shh.
32:25Oh, he's gone.
32:28Don't touch a thing.
32:30Any of you.
32:32Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
32:35Why, Jupiter, that was quick, Cribb.
32:37Gentlemen, these are my assistants.
32:39Detective Sergeant Cribb and Detective Constable Thackeray.
32:42Oh, they're not, you know.
32:43They're the fellows we saw at the park.
32:44I think I can recognize my own men.
32:46Thank you, sir.
32:47What happened?
32:48Haygarth.
32:49Hanged himself.
32:56But we heard a woman scream.
32:58Matron.
32:59Where is she?
32:59She wasn't here.
33:00She must have run out.
33:02Probably in her room.
33:03See that she's all right with you, sir?
33:05Honey, what assist us if everyone left the room?
33:06There's nothing you can do.
33:07Gentlemen, this way, please.
33:09Over to you now, Penguin, old boy.
33:15Well, we didn't allow for that, sir.
33:17It's utterly beyond belief.
33:19A man of Haygarth's brilliance to do this.
33:22What happened this evening after Thackeray and I left, sir?
33:24We all retired to bed.
33:26Everyone?
33:27Yes, I think so.
33:28No, wait a minute.
33:30Archer was somewhat later than the rest of us.
33:33Matron brought a tea tray of cocoa to the dorm,
33:37to the dormitory, as he did last night.
33:39Oh, that's nice.
33:41Archer came in.
33:43Matron left.
33:44We put out the light,
33:45and almost immediately we heard a scream.
33:47Came running in here,
33:48and found Haygarth hanging from the beam.
33:52On an old school tie.
33:57What made you come to this room, sir?
33:59I told you, we heard Matron scream.
34:01You didn't run to her room.
34:02You came here.
34:03What made you think Matron was here, sir?
34:05Ah, I don't think that's a profitable line of inquiry,
34:08Sergeant Cribber.
34:09Unless, yes, of course,
34:11she must have brought him some cocoa.
34:13Look, Sarge,
34:15you'd better take a look at this.
34:17What's that?
34:18A suicide note?
34:20Very strange one.
34:22To whoever may find me,
34:23I've decided to put an end to.
34:25There it stops in the middle of a sentence.
34:27Yeah, something must have interrupted him.
34:30Well, you'd think he'd have finished it
34:31before he hung himself.
34:34If he did.
34:41I think we'd better ask that doctor
34:42to take another look at Mr Haygarth.
34:45What was his name, sir?
34:46Killer.
34:47Aye.
34:49Dr Partridge.
34:52I can't believe it.
34:54For him to have done a thing like this,
34:57it makes no sense.
35:07Oh, he had so much to live for.
35:17Matron,
35:18I would urge you not to distress yourself
35:19by seeking to account for this appalling tragedy.
35:22The only recourse at moments like this
35:24is to commend ourselves to the Almighty.
35:26Aye.
35:27My own concern is for the reputation of the school.
35:30If what has happened were to be bandied about,
35:32it is altogether too frightful to contemplate.
35:35I'm certain we can keep this discreet headmaster
35:38with Jarrett in charge and killer...
35:41Doctor Partridge.
35:43...to sign the certificate.
35:44I'm sure we can keep this confidential.
35:47Yes, for the good name of the school.
35:50I am deeply touched.
35:52Dr Partridge.
35:53It would oblige us if you step upstairs again, sir.
35:55Your medical advice is wanted.
35:56Oh, very well.
36:00I'll have a word in Jarrett's ear.
36:06Thank you, sergeant.
36:08May I have a word, headmaster?
36:16Thank you, killer.
36:18Bit of luck for us.
36:19You happen to be a medical man.
36:20There is a suicide note, but...
36:22Yes, well, someone has to sign the death certificate.
36:24It might as well be me.
36:25No need to involve anyone from outside these walls, eh?
36:29Well, if it can be avoided, of course.
36:31Oh, it's essential.
36:33You and I are familiar with death in all its forms,
36:36but you must put yourself in the position of a governor of a school,
36:39or a parent.
36:40Incident like this could destroy Petersham.
36:46It's a tie in more senses than one.
36:52Have you examined the body again, sir?
36:53I have.
36:54The man is dead.
36:56From what cause, sir?
36:58Well, asphyxia, you know that as well as I.
36:59He hanged himself.
37:00It's not for me to influence you, sir,
37:02but I suggest a second look might justify another opinion.
37:04Look at what, sergeant?
37:06The mark around his neck.
37:08Well, I see only the mark left by the pressure of the necktie.
37:12A perfectly even mark right around the neck.
37:15Have you ever seen a hanged man before, sir?
37:17Yes, twice, in fact.
37:19Do you notice the marking left by the ligature?
37:21Wasn't it deeper at the point where the pressure was greatest?
37:25Oh, now that is a factor I had not considered.
37:29Does it make a lot of difference?
37:30Doctor?
37:31It would appear that Hagarth was strangled.
37:35Then suspend it from the beam to make it look like suicide.
37:37There's also bruising on the left arm and chest
37:39where I suspect it was knelt upon in the act of strangulation.
37:43Partridge?
37:45It's murder, old boy.
37:48Puts me in a very invidious position, sergeant Grimm.
37:50This is my school.
37:52Those are my contemporaries outside.
37:54I really cannot bring myself to question them about a murder.
37:57You'd like me to do it, sir?
37:59In the very exceptional circumstances.
38:01You do understand why.
38:02I appreciate it would hurt you more than me, sir.
38:05But you will exercise the utmost...
38:07Tact and discretion?
38:08Yes, sir.
38:08I was never in favour of violence.
38:11First we had to find a motive.
38:13Now, what could anyone have against Hagarth?
38:15I thought he was the hero of the school, sir.
38:16You told me yourself. He was a confidence trickster.
38:19The Norwood Underground swindle, yes.
38:22Six months with hard labour.
38:25Did you tell the others about him, sir?
38:26No, no, they know nothing of this.
38:28It would have put a blight on the weekend.
38:30A Petersham man with a criminal record.
38:33Oh, perhaps he wasn't your Hagarth at all, sir.
38:37An imposter.
38:38Oh, no, I regret to tell you he was the Hagarth that I knew at school.
38:43Why should anyone want to kill him?
38:45For something he possessed?
38:49That money he collected.
38:51The Petersham Fund.
38:53No, sir, upstairs, man.
38:54See if it's still in his room.
39:00You wouldn't like to change chairs, sir.
39:03No, I'm quite content, thank you.
39:07Fine room.
39:10Your wife, sir?
39:11I am unmarried.
39:13Ah.
39:13That is my mother.
39:15By mistake.
39:17She died eight years ago.
39:19I'm sorry to hear that, sir.
39:22For Florence, it was a release.
39:24She'd fallen on hard times.
39:27I was endeavouring to support us both on a junior master's pay.
39:33Impossible.
39:34Well, you've done well since, sir.
39:36Headmaster of a famous public school.
39:38Even I would hesitate to represent Petersham as that, sergeant.
39:42But I am young for the position, yes.
39:46This reunion, sir, was it at Mr. Hagarth's suggestion?
39:50Yes, yes, it was.
39:52I welcomed it.
39:53The school needs support.
39:55And funds.
39:58Hagarth was a convicted swindler, headmaster.
40:02I must admit that I'm not altogether surprised.
40:07When Matron introduced him...
40:09Matron?
40:10He was a friend of Matron's.
40:12Friend is a word with somewhat doubtful connotations.
40:19Where a lady and a gentleman are concerned.
40:24I introduced Mr. Hagarth to the headmaster, yes.
40:28But he was not a friend.
40:32I met his acquaintance at a musical soiree in Richmond.
40:37And he mentioned his connection with the school.
40:40Well, that's clear, then.
40:42Now, would you tell me what happened this evening after the concert?
40:47I took the visitors up some cocoa.
40:49What time was this?
40:52Oh, it must have been after midnight.
40:55I thought it proper to allow a suitable interval for them to change into their night attire.
41:00Naturally.
41:02Had you taken them cocoa on the previous evening?
41:05Yes.
41:06It was a small token of hospitality.
41:09Much appreciated, I'm sure.
41:12Were they all in the dormitory this evening?
41:15Yes.
41:17No.
41:18No.
41:19Now that you mention it, one of them was missing.
41:22The quiet one.
41:24Mr. Archer.
41:25He came in after me.
41:30Sergeant, do you suppose...
41:32Let's not suppose anything, matron.
41:35Nine pounds, two and sixpence.
41:37But there should be almost a hundred pounds.
41:43Well, you were the last one back in the dormitory.
41:45What were you doing?
41:46Sitting quietly downstairs.
41:49I needed a chance to think.
41:51Think?
41:51About what?
41:53Oh, Lord.
41:55Well, I told you the others, so you might as well know, too.
42:00Years ago, Hagar seduced my wife.
42:04But I didn't learn of it from Constance until last week.
42:08I was trying to decide what to say to the man.
42:11I fully intended to confront him with it this evening.
42:14I was going to see him in his room.
42:16And did you?
42:18No.
42:19No, I didn't.
42:20I realized that...
42:23Realized what, Mr. Archer?
42:25No, no, it doesn't matter.
42:27I'll be the judge of that, sir.
42:28What was it you realized?
42:30Well, that Hagarth was unlikely to be alone, after all.
42:35You see, last night, we all played a stupid jape.
42:39It was most embarrassing.
42:41None of us expected to discover matron in Hagarth's room.
42:46Serving him cocoa?
42:48Not cocoa.
42:50I see.
42:52I think I see.
42:54Hagarth was a shameless pursuer of women.
42:58Or an attraction to them.
43:01You mean?
43:03Well, if matron was in his room, she must have gone to him.
43:07So four of you went to Hagarth's room yesterday night?
43:10It was merely a prank, Sergeant.
43:12I'm an actor.
43:14And I dressed up as our former headmaster.
43:17Just as I did tonight.
43:19And how did Hagarth react to this prank?
43:22Sportingly.
43:23Under the circumstances.
43:26We promise not to tell the head.
43:29For matron's sake.
43:31Decent of them.
43:32At Petersham, we close ranks in adversity.
43:36I have noticed that, sir.
43:39How much did you put into the contribution that was made out of the concert?
43:43I don't see that this has any bearing on the matter under an investigation.
43:47How much, sir?
43:50Three pounds.
43:52Rather less than Mr. Hagarth suggested?
43:54I'm not so flush as the rest of them.
43:55I thought you would like to manage her at the Lyceum.
43:59The Lyceum...
44:01Hackney Wick.
44:04This is a most offensive question.
44:08I have to know how much you contributed, sir.
44:10I said, see if there's been a theft as well.
44:12A couple of quid.
44:13And some silver.
44:15The old school, and you have consulting rooms in Harley Street.
44:17Oh, you must have misheard, Sergeant.
44:19My practice is in Wapping High Street.
44:24Would you help us now?
44:25Your scream tonight brought everyone to this room.
44:30So I understand.
44:31Now, just to get my thoughts straight,
44:33you came to Mr. Hagarth's bedroom.
44:35I have admitted as much.
44:38To bring him some cocoa.
44:40Yes.
44:42I knocked on the door and got no reply.
44:46So you came in, not wishing the cocoa to get cold.
44:50Yes.
44:53And I saw him hanging there.
44:56It was horrible.
44:58I shall never forget it.
45:00I just screamed.
45:02Yes.
45:02You noticed nothing else?
45:05No.
45:07I was so shocked and frightened.
45:10I simply ran from the room.
45:14Why?
45:15Was there something else I should have seen?
45:17Perhaps.
45:18I believe Mr. Hagarth's murderer was still in this room.
45:22Probably in the act of fabricating a suicide note.
45:25When your knock on the door disturbed him.
45:26Now, he must have hid somewhere.
45:28Probably in here.
45:31When you ran out,
45:33he made his escape before the others got here,
45:35leaving the note unfinished.
45:39Who?
45:40The one person who didn't expect you to visit Mr. Hagarth's bedroom.
45:55Good luck, Ed Master.
45:57I'll take that, if I may, sir.
46:01A murderer!
46:02Hagarth was a professional cheat, ma'am.
46:05He cheated you into believing that he loved you.
46:06And he was about to cheat these gentlemen
46:08of the contributions they made to the school.
46:10And ten years ago,
46:11he cheated this lady
46:13of her life savings.
46:15Mrs. Florence Hassel Smith,
46:17victim of the Norwood Underground Swindle,
46:19and mother of John Hassel Smith,
46:21headmaster of this school.
46:23My mother was a saintly woman.
46:27That devil destroyed her life.
46:29I killed him for that!
46:30He'd already served the sentence of the law, sir.
46:33A few months in prison!
46:35What's that compared to the suffering of my mother?
46:41When that man reappeared in my life
46:43and told me that he was an old boy,
46:45I connived at his trickery
46:46because it gave me my chance of revenge.
46:51My mother was a woman of great gentleness.
46:54She lost her friends,
46:55her home,
46:57everything she loved.
47:00Do you know what my mother was reduced to?
47:02A water woman!
47:06Her hand!
47:08Dear God,
47:10I can still see you.
47:14The hell that she endured
47:17was all because of Hagarth.
47:20Prison wasn't enough.
47:23He never knew what suffering meant!
47:26So you strangled him
47:27and arranged it to look like suicide.
47:30Well, that should have worked.
47:33The old boys would have
47:35rallied round for the sake of the school.
47:39Covered up a man's death?
47:41Out of the question, headmaster.
47:44Professional ethics, he might have.
47:46We don't remain schoolboys forever, you know.
47:56Here, Sarge.
47:57Why hadn't you all that money?
47:59The Petersham Fund?
48:01Nothing happened.
48:02There was under ten pounds left in Hagarth's room.
48:05That, Thackeray,
48:06was all the Petershamians chipped in, I asked him.
48:09No pinch-fests.
48:11Here, how much did Jowett put in?
48:13Half a crown.
48:16Oh, well, I suppose he knew
48:17it was going to be a swindle.
48:18You can't blame him.
48:20Do you know, for the first time in my life,
48:22I actually feel sorry for Mr. Jowett.
48:24All them years boasting about going to a good school
48:27and it ends up like this.
48:28He goes back to visit
48:30and what does he get out of it?
48:31Ah, Sergeant Cribb,
48:33Thackeray,
48:35Matron has not yet finished making her statement.
48:37So, if you will hold the fort here,
48:39we are going to pop out for a spot of luncheon.
48:46Gentlemen.
48:54You were saying?
48:56What does he get out of it?
48:58Could be a cup of cocoa.
49:07You were saying?
49:31You were saying?
50:01¶¶
50:18¶¶
50:37¶¶
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