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00:26To be continued...
00:43To be continued...
01:10To be continued...
01:32Did I hear a maiden sigh, please be mine?
01:35That's the hope that makes thee my valentine.
01:39So romantic.
01:41Pantalizing.
01:42Peacework.
01:43Oh, the day will come when both my beloved girls will receive such cards from eligible suitors.
01:49Mama.
01:50Well, I would be happy to receive one.
01:52And overjoyed if it were one you had made, Mama.
01:55Dear Daphne, you do say such felicitous things.
01:58You shall receive one I'm certain of it.
02:01And I don't exclude you, Denise.
02:03I can picture you both married to the most outrageously handsome young gentleman who both cherish and adore you.
02:11Well, Daphne is getting married on Saturday, Mama.
02:14Denise, I was not referring to that, dear.
02:16I was speaking about your partners for life.
02:18Oh, but Mama, I've said...
02:19That's enough, dear.
02:20You'll only upset your sister.
02:22Oh, it's all right, Mama.
02:24Oh, Daphne, I know it's a sacrifice.
02:26But where would we three be without it?
02:29In the poor house.
02:30Now, spare us that.
02:31Daphne said it's all right, Mama.
02:33She isn't protesting.
02:34Well, it's of no consequence to me this time.
02:39That's my Daphne.
02:40It's nothing.
02:41It's a mere interlude.
02:42It'll be over in a few days.
02:45And none of us want to go on doing this drudgery for the rest of our lives.
02:54Sixten.
02:55You again, you old troll.
02:57I advise you against insulting the cloth.
02:59I was insulting the crows.
03:01Now, what are you fussing about this time, eh?
03:03Who owns the plot in the corner by the Stapleton grave?
03:07Well, no one of them, I know of.
03:10Who want to find themselves next to one of that gang for all eternity?
03:13I could tell you a few tales about them Stapleton.
03:15Yes, yes, yes.
03:16That was before my time.
03:17I want a grave dug there.
03:20Oh, yes.
03:21Who's joined the majority then?
03:24No one yet.
03:26After your old tricks again, curate.
03:29Wanted another grave dug for yourself, are you?
03:32You don't understand.
03:33I've been feeling all overish lately.
03:36Distinctly seedy.
03:38Just because I used your grave last week before old Job Smith left his soul.
03:42It was reserved for me.
03:45Yes, three months ago.
03:46When you said you wouldn't last another fortnight.
03:49I'm getting used to your loony ways, you know.
03:51Well, I'm a very sick man.
03:54Confound it, I work here if I can't have some say in the matter.
03:57Who can?
03:58Them women getting you down, is it?
04:00Yeah, three of them under the same roof and not one of them your wife.
04:04Not to drive any man bar me, I reckon.
04:06Still, there'll be one less after Saturday, won't there?
04:09When young Daphne goes up the aisle.
04:10So let's leave the grave digging till after that, shall we?
04:14I'm ordering you to dig it this afternoon.
04:17Or explain why not to the vicar.
04:23How do I get that afternoon?
04:28What's the other thing?
04:34What's the other thing?
04:41What about you?
04:45Who's in my shadow?
04:46What about you?
04:48How do you walk to theausal public mend escort you about?
04:49Help my own hero.
04:50We'll need that for help.
04:50Thought it was you, Thackeray.
04:51Oh, morning, Sarge.
04:53What's all the sprucing up for?
04:55Off to a fancy frisk, are you?
04:57Or is it the Lord Mayor's banquet?
04:59Uh, no, Sarge.
05:00My suit needs a few new creases, that's all.
05:03You're not up for promotion?
05:05What do you think?
05:06Appearance in court as a witness?
05:08No, Sarge.
05:10Not an assignation with one of the fair sex?
05:12Oh, chance will be a fine thing.
05:13I'm stumped, then.
05:15I give up.
05:16Like you are, Sarge.
05:17I'll see you in the morning.
05:21Funeral?
05:25Wedding?
05:26Ha-ha, that's it.
05:27Who's getting hitched?
05:29Uh, not me, Sarge.
05:30Well, I suppose I'll have to tell you anyway.
05:32I'm going to be the groom's best man.
05:33Good Lord.
05:34No disrespect, Thackeray, but who's asked you to be his best man?
05:37A bloke called Henry Russell.
05:39He's a friend of me old days.
05:40Didn't know Thackeray Senior was still going strong.
05:42Well, he's not a very good health, Sarge.
05:44But in the old days, he used to have a few beers with Henry down at the Angel.
05:47Well, Henry made enough money from his cabinet-making to retire to the country.
05:51He lives in Reigate now.
05:52He's getting married on Saturday.
05:54How old is he?
05:5564.
05:56The bride's 27.
05:58And you ought to be the best man.
05:59Well, he asked me Dad first.
06:01But I wrote him a letter telling him he couldn't manage the journey, so he asked me instead.
06:05Yeah, the poor old fellow is just about alone in the world.
06:08But he set his heart on a proper wedding.
06:10So I said I'd do it.
06:11Saturday, Reigate.
06:12What train are we catching?
06:14Oi.
06:15Well, you said Henry was alone in the world.
06:17He needs support.
06:18Well, he wouldn't go all that way just for old anyone, would you?
06:20No.
06:21Better see his best man.
06:22That's a spectacle I don't intend to miss.
06:37Yes, Pippin, it isn't in position, but you'll get to like Daphne.
06:42I know she's very sympathetic.
06:44We're uncommon lucky fellas, you and me.
06:48There.
06:54A little more ham, Daphne.
06:56You need to keep up your strength.
06:58Denise, really?
07:00Denise.
07:01Sarcasm is the language of the devil.
07:03Mama.
07:04It was merely encouraging dear Daphne to eat.
07:07Well, she must neglect herself.
07:09Well, her continuing health is vital to our future, is it not?
07:12I must eat meat so that you shall have cake.
07:15Personally, I hate wedding cake.
07:16Never all gets eaten.
07:17No, Henry isn't partial to it either.
07:19Do you mean cake?
07:20Denise.
07:21I've just had a thought.
07:23What Henry should have is an angel cake.
07:26Oh, can't a man enjoy his meat tea without a chorus of titaning?
07:31Sorry, Uncle Ezra.
07:32Ezra, is the settlement signed and witnessed?
07:35Settlement?
07:37Settlement.
07:38All these things to attend to before the wedding, and I have other duties in the parish, you know.
07:43And I'm far from well.
07:44Is it done, Ezra?
07:45Yes, yes.
07:46I saw Henry Russell with the solicitor yesterday.
07:51Daphne gets the lot, every brass farthing.
07:55It really is in questionable taste to ask a man to make his will a week before the wedding.
08:01Nonsense!
08:02A man has a duty to make provision for the unforeseen.
08:05My Mortimer did.
08:07Rest his soul.
08:07Oh.
08:08And saddled his poor brother with three troublesome women.
08:12Oh, troublesome we may be, but where would you be without us?
08:15The Church of England couldn't keep you in shoe leather.
08:18Besides, you'll be down to two women after Saturday.
08:22Yes, but for how long?
08:24Henry doesn't look very durable to me.
08:28Henry, why do they always have to be so infernally old?
08:32The heart has its reasons.
08:34Did you confirm that Henry has no relatives?
08:36No relatives?
08:38Oh.
08:39There's no trouble there, then.
08:42There's one thing that's new, though.
08:45A best man.
08:47A best man?
08:59Who is he?
09:00Someone local?
09:02Oh, from London, I understand.
09:04London?
09:05That's all right, then.
09:06Denise and I can take care of him.
09:08Mama, let's see what the teacups say about Saturday.
09:11Oh, yes, please, Mama.
09:12Very well, then.
09:13You know what to do.
09:18Do I have any first?
09:20Thank you, dear.
09:23Oh, dear, what trouble I see.
09:26A beautiful wedding.
09:28A very short marriage.
09:31I see a cat walking behind a coffin.
09:34Now, what can that mean?
09:37Denise, let me see yours.
09:39Thank you, dear.
09:43This is very interesting.
09:46A stranger is coming into your life.
09:49He's very smart.
09:51And very mysterious.
09:53From London, surely.
10:00Why should she get a mysterious stranger from London?
10:04Denise, your turn will come, darling.
10:08Haven't I always promised each of you a handsome, energetic young husband?
10:12When our circumstances permit.
10:14Mama, it seems that I've done more than my share in trying to improve our circumstances.
10:19I know, darling, it's very vexing, but nature has a way of adjusting the balance.
10:24You remember when you were young, and Denise had two bouts of chickenpox, and you didn't get it at all?
10:29It's not the same thing.
10:31It lasts about as long, dear.
10:34Who is it, Denise?
10:36The sexton.
10:38Oh.
10:38He wants a shilling for digging a grave.
10:40Oh, my stars and garters.
10:42Yes.
10:43Esra, what have you done?
10:45They are not even married yet.
10:46What are you talking about?
10:48This grave is for me.
10:49Mine.
10:50Yours?
10:51Give the sexton his money, Denise.
10:53Why will you do this, you old lunatic?
10:55It gives me peace of mind to know where I'll be lying.
10:58I've been well below pylately.
11:01Sinking fast.
11:03You'll be well and truly sunk by the time I've finished with you.
11:06You need me at the wedding.
11:07More's the pity.
11:08If I could think of a way of managing without you, perhaps we should postpone.
11:12No.
11:13Never quit certainty for hope.
11:15The wedding will take place as arranged.
11:20The bride, taking the bridegroom's arm, goes into the vestry.
11:24Signatures are then affixed and a registration date.
11:27After which the marriage pair enter their carriage and retire to the breakfast.
11:30What about the best man?
11:32You look after the bridesmaids.
11:35Bridesmaids?
11:35And pay the sexton for his services.
11:38And hand the guests into their carriages, making sure that you're the last to leave.
11:41And if there are any speeches at the breakfast.
11:44Speeches?
11:44Oh, it's true.
11:46The Rye Gate, I think.
11:48All the luck in the world, sir.
11:50It's a great adventure.
11:52And may you be blessed with offspring in abundance.
12:02Daphne, isn't it time you finish dressing?
12:05I'll help you.
12:06I'm all of a flatter.
12:07I've never felt like this before.
12:09It's all going to go wrong.
12:11I know it.
12:12Silly.
12:12How could it?
12:13Mama has everything under control.
12:15But how's she?
12:17She didn't know about the best man.
12:20Don't worry.
12:21I'll take care of him.
12:22She hadn't heard about Uncle having a grave dug.
12:25That was a horrid surprise.
12:27He's always doing it.
12:29Everyone knows he's dotty.
12:32Oh, there's a hook gone.
12:33Can you repair it?
12:35No, there isn't time.
12:38There.
12:40No one will notice.
12:41Let's have a look at you.
12:43There's a mark.
12:45Mama will have 40 fits.
12:47Oh, use a bouquet to hide it.
12:49I wish we could call the whole thing off.
12:54Uncle's gone to the church and good riddance.
12:56Oh, my dear, what a picture.
12:59You look lovelier each time I see you.
13:02I could burst with pride.
13:05And Denise, the perfect bridesmaid.
13:08You know what they say about a happy bridesmaid.
13:10You won't have long to wait, I'm certain.
13:13What about me, Mama?
13:14How long will I have to wait?
13:15It's in the teacups, darling.
13:17Now, come along.
13:17It's nearly half past.
13:19Oh, I do love weddings.
13:27Oh, I do love weddings.
13:41Do you think she'll like it, Pippin?
13:42Oh, I do hope she does.
13:46Well, there are you.
13:52Yes, that's all right.
13:55Glasses, sherry.
13:57Yes.
14:04Gentlemen, how good of you to come.
14:07Of course I do, Edward.
14:11And you're Edward's friend, Mr. Cribb.
14:13Mr. Russell.
14:13Oh, come in, both of you.
14:20Take a glass of sherry.
14:22You're not on duty today.
14:24Edward is.
14:24Not too much for him.
14:25Well, I think one glass won't do any harm.
14:29How smart you both look.
14:31But no, it's as well.
14:33So kind of you.
14:35Oh, I got them from a flower stall in Victoria Station, but mine's wilted already.
14:39Mine snapped off.
14:42Really?
14:43I did happen to get some in, just in case.
14:47Ah, capital.
14:49Ah, sherry for you both, then.
14:51Forgive me if I don't join you, but I'm feeling just a little...
14:55Nervous?
14:57Yes.
14:59Ridiculous, isn't it?
15:00You must think me an old fool.
15:03Certainly too old to be entering matrimony for the first time.
15:08I rarely thought life had passed me by.
15:11I do hope I'm doing the right thing.
15:13By Daphne, I mean.
15:15To Daphne.
15:16And Henry.
15:17Oh, thank you.
15:19Have you known the young lady long, sir?
15:20Oh, barely a year.
15:21I was invited up to the curate's house to mend an antique chair.
15:26I'm a cabinet maker, you know, and that was how we met.
15:31I've made this chair for Daphne's wedding present.
15:35Do you think she'll be pleased?
15:37It's a splendid gift, sir.
15:38Oh, it's nearly time for the service, sir.
15:40Perhaps we should be moving.
15:41There speaks your best man, Mr. Russell.
15:43Got to get there before the bride.
15:44Please call me Henry.
15:45Everybody does.
15:46Well, come on, Pippin.
15:49This is it at last.
15:51Oh, I wish I could stop the fluttering in my stomach.
15:54No, I wish I could stop the fringes.
15:59I wish I could stop the fringes.
16:46Here they come.
17:15Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God and in the face of this congregation
17:21to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony,
17:26which is an honorable estate instituted of God in the time of man's peace.
17:57What happens next?
17:58Your speech now, Beggar.
18:01Uh, Reverend.
18:03Oh, thank you, thank you.
18:06Oh, happy.
18:11Ladies and gentlemen, the toast to the happy couple, to Henry and Daphne.
18:32The cake is delicious, Daphne, as usual.
18:36I beg your pardon, Miss?
18:37Oh, I said it's the usual thing for Daphne's cake to be delicious.
18:40She's such a splendid cook.
18:41Yes, Mr. Crimm, my daughters cook like angels.
18:44I've always considered it a wifely duty to cook well.
18:47Do you like good food?
18:48Tolerably well, ma'am.
18:49By the look of you, you haven't had much.
18:52I don't know if you're married, but if you are, she doesn't believe in overfeeding you, does she?
18:56Yeah.
19:04My congratulations, Henry.
19:06Oh, thank you.
19:08I say, it was jolly decent of you to come all this way with young Edward.
19:13Young Edward?
19:14Ah, well, someone has to keep him in order.
19:16So, like his father, a favourite with the fair sex.
19:21Really?
19:30I do like to see a man enjoy his food.
19:33Are you partial to mutton pie, Mr. Crimm?
19:35Not usually, ma'am.
19:37Ah, you'd change your mind if Denise had cooked it.
19:39My girls do all the cooking here.
19:41Except the soups.
19:43Mama excels at those.
19:44Especially oxtail.
19:45Denise, you could say Mama's oxtail soup is positively the last word.
19:49Really?
19:51I look forward to sampling that.
19:54Yes.
19:55Denise, will you go and see if the carriage has come, dear?
20:10More wine, ma'am?
20:11Just a suspicion, please.
20:16Have you known Henry Long?
20:17No, ma'am.
20:18Uh, it's my father he knows.
20:21I'm standing in for him on this occasion.
20:23He's getting on a bit now and rather frail.
20:26Oh.
20:27I do hate to see an old gentleman in decline.
20:30Is the weakness in his legs?
20:31Uh, yes, ma'am.
20:32Worse when it goes to the brain.
20:34What do you want, Ezra?
20:36Oh, the sciatic is playing up again.
20:39Uh, Mr. Thackeray, I wonder if you and your friend would execute a small favour for me.
20:43Uh, removals, in fact.
20:45Oh, only too glad, sir.
20:46Yes, I do hope you're not up to your morbid tricks again, Ezra.
20:49It is Daphne's wedding day, you know.
20:51He keeps a coffin in the woodshed.
20:54I simply want some help with Daphne's portmanteau.
20:57It needs putting on the carriage.
20:59Oh.
20:59We'll attain to it at once, sir.
21:01Uh, Mr. Crave?
21:14Here we are.
21:16Well, they rescued you from the ladies, anyway, twittering on about their culinary skills.
21:22Women have far too much to say.
21:25As St. Paul appreciated the sagacious man.
21:28Women should learn in silence with all subjection.
21:311 Timothy 2.11.
21:33Excuse me, sir.
21:34That's the trunk, is it?
21:35Uh, yes.
21:36Uh, I'll take the, uh, hat box.
21:38I have to be careful.
21:39The heart, you know.
21:40Heart?
21:41You mentioned sciatica downstairs.
21:42Yes, sir.
21:43Dangerous combination.
21:45Right, Mr. Thackeray.
21:47We'll soon have this downstairs.
21:49As you say, Mr. Cribb.
21:51Oh!
21:52Mustn't reveal the secrets of a lady's wardrobe.
22:15You're the gardener, sir?
22:17Oh, no.
22:18It's a battleground.
22:20Weeds everywhere.
22:21It's too much for me.
22:22The heart or the sciatica?
22:23Yes.
22:24I have to pay the sexton to dig it over.
22:27Oh, sexton should be used to spade work.
22:30Oh, yes.
22:32It's nice in the summer, though.
22:34Fox loves as tall as yourself.
22:36Careful of them, sir, poisonous.
22:38Really?
22:39Oh, we always have fox loves in our gardens.
22:42It's a very popular plant with the ladies.
22:45I thought fox gloves were for insincerity.
22:57We're about to leave now.
22:59I can't thank you enough for being my groomsmen, Edward, and you, Mr. Cribb, for all your help.
23:06I'm not sure whether we shall meet again.
23:09In that case, Edward and I had better kiss the bride.
23:30Good luck.
23:32Good luck.
23:34Good luck.
23:34Good luck.
23:42Good luck.
23:43Funny things, really.
23:44What's that?
23:44Them two getting married.
23:46I don't mind telling you I had my doubts when I first heard about it.
23:49There's no fool like an old fool I say to myself.
23:52But I've changed me mind now.
23:53Why? I've seen them together.
23:55Him so happy, and young Daphne as calm as if she'd been through it all before.
23:59Made me quite misty-eyed in church.
24:02I'm not a sentimental man, as you know.
24:05Is Henry in funds?
24:07Eh?
24:08Money, what's it worth?
24:10Oh, not much, I reckon.
24:12He owns a cottage, true.
24:14There's only a cabinet maker in his working life.
24:17Why?
24:18Oh, it doesn't matter.
24:20Daphne's people haven't got much.
24:22How do you know?
24:24She's wearing a second-hand wedding dress.
24:26Didn't you notice?
24:28Or is your eyes on someone else?
24:46That silly old cat getting under my feet.
24:50What was that?
24:51Oh, now it's woken you up.
24:54Oh, no, I wasn't sleeping, dearest.
24:56I never sleep by day.
24:58I always believe in keeping active.
25:03I learned that from my father.
25:05Did I tell you he lived to be 91?
25:08You don't say.
25:10Mine was dead before 40.
25:12How distressing.
25:14Was it an accident?
25:15No, it was no accident.
25:18Henry, my love.
25:20Mama has invited us for dinner on Sunday.
25:23Oh, is that so?
25:25You don't sound very pleased at the prospect.
25:27Oh, no, don't misunderstand me, dearest.
25:29Your mother's a charming lady.
25:31It's just that I'm very reluctant to give up any time alone with you.
25:37Oh, Henry, you say the sweetest things.
25:40Of course.
25:42We'll do just as you want.
25:49Thank you, God, for the world so sweet.
25:51Thank you, God, for the things we eat.
25:53Thank you, God, for the birds that sing.
25:55Thank you, God, for everything.
25:56Amen.
25:57Amen.
25:58Dinner to the minute and ready to begin it.
26:00Amen.
26:04I'm up and high again, Denise.
26:06Wait and see, Uncle.
26:07Soup first, anyway.
26:08Mmm, opstale.
26:09I can smell it.
26:11Mama has made it specially in your honor.
26:13Really?
26:14You shouldn't have gone to so much trouble.
26:16Oh, no, Mama has always taken the trouble.
26:19Denise, this one is for Henry, dear.
26:25Daphne, my dear?
26:26Ah, I...
26:27Daphne doesn't take opstale soup.
26:29She has such a delicate digestion.
26:30Oh, I'm so sorry, dear.
26:35No, no, Henry.
26:36I don't have it either.
26:37It's for you.
26:38Just as Mama said.
26:40So kind.
26:41Daphne and Denise have to be careful.
26:43The mutton pie is their treat.
26:46Now, tell me what you think of this.
26:56I bought the cocoa.
26:58The damn thing's been buzzing around me face all day.
27:01Now, where's it gone?
27:02Don't step back.
27:04Uh, Sarge, could you spare me for the rest of the day?
27:07I've had this letter from Henry Russell.
27:09What I really need in here are some fly papers, the sort that poison the beggars.
27:12Yeah, the poor old chap's in trouble.
27:13It seems he's had an heart attack.
27:14Arsenic.
27:15Eh?
27:15Fly papers coated with arsenic.
27:18What was that about, Henry?
27:19An heart attack, Sarge.
27:21Oh, the doctor says he's lucky to be alive.
27:23He could have another one at any time.
27:24Well, that's rotten luck.
27:26Nice old boy.
27:27One of nature's gentlemen.
27:29Got you.
27:31What else did he say?
27:33Oh, well, he wants me to go and see him.
27:35Rygate?
27:36What for?
27:36Oh, some sort of favor he wants to ask of me.
27:38Must be thinking about a will.
27:40Needs an executor.
27:41Oh, no, it can't be that.
27:42It says here, if the worst happens, I've made the necessary arrangements.
27:46My dear wife and her family thoughtfully assisted me in drawing up my will before the wedding.
27:51Did they?
27:53Thoughtful by George, yes.
27:55Something must be bothering him.
27:56If he could spare me for the rest of the day.
27:58Can't let you go.
28:00Oh.
28:02Without support.
28:04We'll go together.
28:04Drink up.
28:08I don't think I will.
28:10Something floating on the top.
28:16Remember me, Mrs. Russell?
28:17Edward Thackeray, Henry's best man.
28:20And, uh, my, uh, friend, uh, Mr. Cribb.
28:23Yes.
28:24What can I do for you?
28:26Well, I got Henry's letter.
28:28I thought I'd better come down.
28:30How is he now?
28:31Nasty shock for both of you.
28:32Oh, yes.
28:34He's getting on well.
28:36Now, you'd better both come in.
28:41Henry, you didn't tell me your friends from London were coming.
28:44Oh, dear.
28:45Oh, uh, that was my idea, ma'am.
28:47Hello, Henry.
28:48Edward.
28:48Mr. Cribb.
28:49Hello, Henry.
28:50I hope we're not putting you out.
28:51Well, no, not in the least.
28:53Daphne will make us all a pot of tea, won't you, my pet?
28:56Tea?
28:56Just what the doctor ordered.
29:08So good of you to come.
29:10Oh, this has been a terrible shock.
29:12When did it happen?
29:13Sunday evening.
29:14We went to Daphne's mother for dinner, and a very good dinner it was.
29:18What did you have?
29:18Soup, mutton pie, apple charlotte.
29:22Perhaps I overindulged.
29:24I thought I had indigestion.
29:26When we got home, I began to vomit, and then I felt dizzy, and I couldn't stand up.
29:33Daphne went and fetched Dr. Burden, and he had no doubt that I'd suffered a heart attack.
29:40Dr. Burden?
29:40I've known him for years.
29:41He's very good.
29:43Did you never suffer from heart trouble before?
29:44No, never.
29:45Oh, Edward, I must ask you this before Daphne comes back.
29:50The doctor said that I ought to be prepared for another attack.
29:55Well, I know what he means.
29:57And, of course, I made a will when he arranged the settlement before the wedding.
30:02Everything goes to Daphne.
30:04It's little enough, poor child, but there is one item.
30:10I'm sure she won't...
30:12Too much talking isn't good for you, Henry.
30:15Hello, dear.
30:16The gentleman can't stay long.
30:18We have to get your things ready.
30:20Ready for what, ma'am?
30:21We're moving him to Mama's.
30:23She's off to nurse him back to help.
30:25Sure, it isn't necessary.
30:26I'm very happy here being looked after by you, dearest.
30:30Oh, Henry, I simply can't manage alone, especially when you invite your friends without telling me.
30:35Well, if we're in the way at all, ma'am.
30:38What's the matter?
30:39Scalded my tongue.
30:40It's a glass of cold water.
30:41Oh, I'll show you.
30:45Yeah, I do hope that he...
30:48What are you going to tell me in confidence, then, Henry?
30:53Oh, I see.
30:55Oh, I'm sorry, Sarge.
30:57All this way for some old moggy.
30:59Not at all.
30:59I think our services are needed here.
31:01What do you mean by that?
31:02Those ladies got Henry to make a will before the wedding, leaving everything to Daphne.
31:06And now he has a heart attack.
31:08Oh, put like that.
31:09It does sound a bit rum.
31:10I'm trying to recollect an out-of-turn remark made by Denise at the wedding breakfast.
31:14Mrs. Winter hushed her pretty fast about something being positive at the last word.
31:19Mrs. Winter's ox-tow soup.
31:21They don't think she put anything...
31:22I'm going to see that, doctor.
31:23You're going to visit the section of this parish.
31:25Ferret out everything you can about the curate and his family, where they came from, how long they've been here.
31:29Oh, that's an horrible idea.
31:30Why do you think they do...
31:31Let's leave the thinking till later, shall we, Thackeray?
31:34Unless you want a cat about the house.
31:47Is everything quiet, Denise?
31:49Perfectly.
31:50Henry's in bed.
31:51Daphne's reading a poetry tune.
31:52Uncle won't be back from choir practice for quite a while yet.
31:55Very well, then.
31:57Can you get Mrs. Beaton down from the shelf, dear?
32:00Turn to the soups.
32:02I think it's page 47.
32:04Oh, Mama, you are a caution.
32:07You must have picked these in the garden last summer.
32:08I require six this time.
32:11Enough to do the job without ruining the flavour.
32:13A fatal dose?
32:14We needn't go into that.
32:16As Mrs. Beaton says, season according to taste.
32:19Why didn't we give him the full dose the first time?
32:21It's obvious to me we could have saved all this trouble.
32:24At ease, we have to avoid the obvious.
32:27It would have been obvious to find much wealthier husbands for you and Daphne.
32:30But a poor, lonely old soul like Henry,
32:33who has very little to leave but a cottage and a few sticks of furniture,
32:36he can quit this world without upsetting a single.
32:40If the job is done right.
32:42With a heart attack first to prepare people.
32:44That's my Denise.
32:45The bowl, please, dear.
32:48What's going on?
32:50Is Henry asleep, dear?
32:52Yes.
32:53Seven standards have done a while and he's exhausted.
32:56What are you making?
32:58Oh, can I help?
32:59You may as well.
33:02It has to be crushed to a powder.
33:04Use that.
33:06Oh!
33:07You odious animal.
33:08Denise, will you put the cat out, please, dear?
33:12Oh, Pippin.
33:14Wouldn't you like to lick the bowl?
33:16Denise.
33:20Our uncle's coming.
33:22Okay, then.
33:22He mustn't see us doing this.
33:24Anyone but uncle would have found out years ago.
33:26Him?
33:26Couldn't find a camel in a cow shed.
33:28What's wrong, Ezra?
33:30You should be taking choir practice.
33:32I know, I know.
33:34I said, onward Christian soldiers.
33:37And the little blighters closed their books and went home.
33:40Next.
33:42Paper.
33:48Shirt and trousers.
33:49Beg your pardon?
33:50Slip them off.
33:51I'm not one of your patients, Doctor.
33:52That's right.
33:53Everyone has a full examination the first time.
33:55I'm Sergeant.
33:55My dear chap, even if you're Mr. Glatson himself,
33:57I'd still need to sound your chest.
33:59All I want is some information.
34:01How long have you known a Mr. Henry Russell?
34:04Mr. Henry Russell?
34:06Oh, many years.
34:08I inherited him from Dr. Owen when I took over the practice.
34:10This heart attack he's had, did you expect it?
34:14I don't see why that should concern you.
34:16Heart attacks are not uncommon among the elderly.
34:19Did he have good health before this?
34:21But these are confidential matters.
34:23What is all this about?
34:24I don't.
34:25Is it criminal to have a heart attack?
34:27My concern is to make sure he doesn't have another.
34:29Wrong, old chap.
34:30That's my concern.
34:32Now, if you want information from me,
34:34I'll be obliged if you obtain the proper authority.
34:37Next.
34:38And if you go to the house bothering my patient,
34:40I'll report you to the police.
34:44Oh, Mr.
34:44Wouldn't it be fitting for me to talk about the curate behind his back?
34:48Oh, I understand that.
34:49I just thought you...
34:50But it'd be disloyal, wouldn't it?
34:52Sacrilegious.
34:53Oh, yes.
34:53Well, I suppose it would.
34:55Oh, I say.
34:57There's a tanner on the floor.
34:59It, uh, must have dropped out of someone's pocket
35:01when they were saying their prayers.
35:03Shall I hand it to you?
35:05Or shall I put it in the box by the door?
35:07Oh, no, I'll take care of it.
35:08What are you going to tell me about the curate, then?
35:10Mr. Wintour, yeah.
35:12I suppose it'd be all right to talk about him as a neighbour,
35:14setting aside his pastoral duty,
35:16so thank you very much, sir.
35:21He's balmy.
35:22We can't get him to do a thing right, you know.
35:25I've seen him at a christening
35:27give the baby back to the wrong family.
35:29Nobody minded.
35:31Just thank the good Lord that he didn't drop it in the font.
35:33How long has he been here, Sexton?
35:35Eleven months.
35:36Oh, not long, then.
35:37Eleven months too long.
35:40We've been waiting for him to pass on, you know.
35:42Yes, I heard he was a sick man.
35:45Only up there.
35:47No, I mean pass on to another parish.
35:51It's the women that turned his brain, you know.
35:53No.
35:54A man of the cloth?
35:57No, I don't mean that way.
35:59I'm talking about his sister-in-law.
36:02He had her two daughters.
36:04Formidable females, you know, them three.
36:06Oh, he manages to keep them all on a curate stipend.
36:09I'm blessed if I know.
36:11They must have some savings, I suppose.
36:13Or some secret way of turning a penny.
36:15What do you mean by that, Sexton?
36:17I don't know.
36:18Don't suppose I ever will now.
36:20They'll be off to a new Paris soon.
36:22You mark my words.
36:23Them sort don't stay long in one place.
36:25Have you any idea where they came from?
36:28St. Gabriel's Worthing.
36:30You can check up in Trocfords just to make sure.
36:34Yeah.
36:34What's all this interest in the winters?
36:40I'll take you to the station, then you're going back to London.
36:43What for, Sarge?
36:44I want you to see Mr. Blythe, the Home Office Toxicologist.
36:46Toxie what?
36:47Poisons.
36:48Oh, glory.
36:49I'm interested in everything that produces the symptoms of a heart attack.
36:52Oh, poor old Henry.
36:53Severe chest pain, shortness of breath.
36:55Mr. Blythe will know.
36:56We're probably looking for a vegetable poison.
36:58But make a note of everything he told you.
37:00I want a comprehensive list.
37:01I won't miss a thing, Sarge.
37:02Where are you going?
37:03Church, St. Gabriel's Worthing.
37:17My curate, you require information about him?
37:20No, sir.
37:20His predecessor.
37:22Oh, Ezra, you mean.
37:24Well, what do you want to know about him?
37:26How long was he with you, sir?
37:27A little over a year.
37:28He came from St. Jude's at Effingham.
37:31Highly recommended.
37:33What is the church coming to when you can't trust the word of a fellow parson?
37:39He was a disappointment.
37:42Undeniably a character, though.
37:44You could say that for Ezra.
37:46How did you get rid of him, sir?
37:48You can't treat curates like the death watch beetle, unfortunately.
37:53No, he resigned because of the family bereavement.
37:58It's a sad business.
38:00One of his nieces married our senior church warden, Jacob Dunn.
38:04A decent old stick, but far too old for her.
38:08It really was a case of May with December.
38:12That's his plaque over there.
38:14He died?
38:16A few weeks after the marriage.
38:18Heart failure.
38:19Young Daphne was left a widow at 26.
38:23Daphne, you're not mistaken, sir.
38:24Absolutely not.
38:26A winsome lass.
38:28Soon after the funeral, her family moved away, and I'm not quite sure where they went to.
38:34Thank heavens I didn't have to write a testimonial for Ezra.
38:38They came from Effingham?
38:39St. Jude's.
38:47THE END
38:59ORGAN PLAYS
39:22Oh, it's too much having to make these again.
39:26Hair gone white, and teeth not mine.
39:28Let Daphne be my valentine.
39:30Oh, you can't.
39:32Clear the table now, girls. It'll be time for supper soon.
39:34Didn't he ask Henry what he'd like?
39:36He's your husband.
39:39Henry!
39:43Henry!
39:47What can we get you for supper?
39:49Something warm, perhaps?
39:51I don't think so, dear.
39:53It's a little near bedtime for me,
39:55but Pippin would like his supper.
40:00Columbine, common buckthorn,
40:02foxglove, green ellibore,
40:05lupin, lily of the valley...
40:07Lupin?
40:08Yeah, that's right.
40:10Breathing is depressed,
40:11and there's a distinct slowing of the heart.
40:14Now, do you want me to finish?
40:15After that, there's the poisonous fungi.
40:17No, it's hopeless.
40:18A pearl in a hailstorm.
40:20Hold on, Sarge.
40:22Haven't you forgotten something?
40:23What's that?
40:24Well, the curate, Uncle Ezra,
40:26he said they grow foxgloves in their garden,
40:28always have done.
40:29Well, it's unlike you to overlook a vital clue like that.
40:33Foxgloves could prove very dangerous to the art.
40:36Three or four leaves crushed up in the oxtail soup
40:39could prove fatal.
40:40Haven't you forgotten something?
40:41What's that?
40:42Henry's still alive.
40:44All right, it could be uncommon, clever.
40:46Small dose, mild heart attack,
40:48doctor prepared for the worst.
40:49But did you look at that garden?
40:51There were tote stools everywhere,
40:53lilies of the valley,
40:54lupins, for all we know,
40:55it's going to be a devil to pin down.
40:57Let's hope for a stroke of luck.
40:59A what?
41:07It's got to be today.
41:09I can't endure any more of it.
41:11Daphne, my dear,
41:13would you get Pippin, the sorcerer of milk?
41:15Daphne, would you fetch my slippers?
41:17When all this is over,
41:18I'll drown that wretched animal myself.
41:20You'll do no such thing.
41:21We'll leave him behind when we move to Norfolk.
41:24Oh, Mama, tell us, please,
41:25can we finish off our valentines today?
41:28Oh, Henry, and how are we this morning?
41:31Much better.
41:32I'm beginning to think of the inner man again.
41:36What's for lunch?
41:37Well, I thought I'd treat you again.
41:41You've paid no more visits to the house?
41:43The patient has fully recovered.
41:45Now, if you would kindly remove yourselves from my surgery.
41:48Have you had experience of poisoning before, doctor?
41:51Poisoning?
41:52Common poisons from the garden.
41:54Digitalish, that sort of thing.
41:56Powerful action on the heart.
41:58Look, if you have something to say to me, Sergeant,
42:01I'd be obliged if you'd come to the point.
42:03Let's take the case of three ladies in reduced circumstances,
42:06widow and two daughters.
42:08Their only means of support,
42:09a crackpot curate not particularly good at his job.
42:12Now, in every parish, there are gullible old men,
42:14not especially rich,
42:15but living on their savings in cottages of their own.
42:18Enough, if it were left to the ladies,
42:20to keep the wolf from the door for a few months.
42:25Won't be long now, Henry.
42:28Now, which old man isn't susceptible to the flutter of a female eye
42:31and the promise of some comfort in his declining years?
42:34So the pattern is established.
42:36A quick courtship,
42:37a settlement of all his possessions on the love of his life,
42:39followed by a wedding,
42:41followed by a heart attack,
42:42followed by a funeral.
42:44The wedding and the funeral conducted by the curate,
42:46the heart attack by the ladies.
42:50Do you have evidence of all this?
42:51Not enough yet, sir,
42:52but I've seen the graves of three old men
42:54who contracted marriages to the winter girls.
42:56And you believe they were all poisoned?
42:58Possibly.
42:59How do you prove a thing like this?
43:00Exhumation and post-mortem,
43:02but that takes time and still may not be conclusive.
43:06If digitalin was used,
43:09I think you'll find that there are no characteristic symptoms.
43:37who's that?
43:41It's that man who came to the wedding.
43:43Mr. Thackeray?
43:44No, the other one.
43:45Mr. Cribb.
43:46What does he want?
43:47Henry, did you invite him here again?
43:49Take Henry into the kitchen, dear,
43:51and take his soup.
43:52He can drink it in there.
43:53Come along, Henry.
43:54Come along, Henry.
44:00Come along.
44:00Come along, Henry.
44:07Oh, Mr. Cribb, what a surprise.
44:09We were just about to have lunch.
44:10I interrupted you?
44:13Good.
44:14What do you mean?
44:16Where's Henry, ma'am?
44:17He's in there.
44:18He's not to be disturbed.
44:20Capital, it's you three I came to see.
44:22We three?
44:23Well, I don't think Uncle Ezra was in on this, was he?
44:26You could light a fire under him and he wouldn't notice.
44:29In on what, Mr. Cribb?
44:30The sudden deaths of three old gentlemen who married your daughters.
44:34William Lamb, four years ago at Whitney.
44:38James Beresford at Effingham.
44:40And Jacob Dunn at Worthing.
44:42Mr. Beresford was married to you, miss.
44:44The other two were husbands of your sister.
44:46Well, we know this.
44:47They were ancient.
44:48Decrepit.
44:49We sacrificed ourselves to please them.
44:52You murdered them.
44:54Oh, that's a wicked slander, Mr. Cribb.
44:58What are you going to do about it?
45:00Invite me to lunch?
45:03Oxdale soup, perhaps?
45:05Or is it mutton pie?
45:07I don't know what you mean.
45:09With a dash of something added.
45:11Mama.
45:12Why have you come here?
45:13And what do you want?
45:15Perhaps an accommodation, Mr. Cribb.
45:18Detective Sergeant Cribb, Miss Scotland Yard.
45:21Oh, how melodramatic.
45:23What do you want us to do?
45:24Go down on our knees and confess?
45:26Miss, you'll find nothing by disturbing the dead.
45:28I knew it was all going to go wrong this time.
45:30I knew it.
45:31You can't charge us without stronger evidence.
45:34I am in the process of obtaining that, ma'am.
45:46But what's he doing?
45:48Digging up a few plants.
45:50Where's your pity?
45:51Have you ever tried to live on a curate's wage,
45:53doing peace work until midnight to make up?
45:55My pity's with the victims, Miss.
45:57You chose them well.
45:59They had so little that it mattered to no one if they died,
46:02except the happy widow with the modest windfall.
46:06Where is Henry?
46:08You don't propose to tell him.
46:10He wouldn't believe you.
46:11Quite right, of course.
46:14You've been very clever.
46:16Common poisons from the garden are the very devil to detect in post-mortem.
46:20I could get an order to exhume your previous victims,
46:24and I probably will.
46:26But I doubt if it'll provide enough evidence for the prosecution.
46:29You can't get the proof.
46:30But I rather think the weddings will stop.
46:33Dr. Burden knows my suspicions, and he'll be watching.
46:37We'll all be watching.
46:39And if anything happens to Henry...
46:41But he's an old man.
46:43He could go at any time.
46:44You'd better start praying, ma'am,
46:46or you'll be telling your story to a judge and jury.
46:54Henry, you haven't touched your soup.
46:56Oh, dear, you forgot to let me have a spoon.
46:59It's all right, it's all right.
47:01Volunteering some evidence, ma'am?
47:03You stupid girl.
47:04Oh, I'm not so sure.
47:05She's given us a chance to test the soup to see if it's safe.
47:07A spoon, if you please, miss.
47:10Now, if it isn't poisoned,
47:13I shall owe you all an apology.
47:22Who's going to taste it, Mrs. Russell?
47:27Miss Denise?
47:30Mrs. Winter, let's have the opinion of the cook.
47:35It's gone cold.
47:36I think I'll get a little more from the pot.
47:37No, no, no, no, no, ma'am.
47:39That's the soup we're testing.
47:58That's not much help, miss.
48:01What'll I do for evidence now?
48:04I've got to build a cast-iron case for prosecution.
48:07It could take years.
48:11Years while you ladies wait,
48:13not knowing whether we've found enough to convict you.
48:16Years that Daphne must devote
48:18to keeping Henry in good health and happiness.
48:21Because if I hear one whisper,
48:24that is not...
48:25Oh, Daphne, we'll share the work.
48:26He can stay with us as long as you like.
48:28But his father lived to be 91.
48:30Over 25 years of Henry.
48:33And the cat.
48:34A life sentence.
48:35Dr. Burden will be calling once a fortnight.
48:39Just to check.
48:50Daphne, get Henry's lunch.
48:52And pour him a glass of stout.
48:54It's strengthening.
49:00This will be worse than hard labor.
49:04But a labor of love, miss.
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