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01:30The day you are carried homeward in triumph, away from this door.
01:36Baby will soon want to know what you're made of, and scatter your stuffing all over the floor.
01:52I never spoke to Lily Farris again after the incident in Lily's bedroom, or to her pianist and accomplice, Otto
01:58Mergen.
02:00Not that my snubbing them had the slightest effect.
02:04Like all egotists, they were completely indifferent to what anybody else thought of them.
02:09Except, of course, that in their case they were obliged to be aware of the sensibilities of their audiences.
02:14But how were audiences to know that the English rose captivating them twice nightly with her wide eyes and childish
02:20songs was depraved?
02:24That she actually preyed on innocent young girls to satisfy her and Mergen's obscene appetites.
02:30Audiences adored her, and the hideously waxen Mergen, which says a lot about the illusory nature of the theatre.
02:39But whatever false image they maintained on stage, the presence of Lily and Mergen was a polluting force,
02:46nudging us inexorably nearer to the edge of the pit.
02:48If the pearl has come out of your hair, then some young rascal will pull you to pieces...
02:55Stop behaving yourself!
02:56You giant bloody ugly...
02:57Are you free on the scuffing?
02:59I'll take that up myself!
03:00Take your mind off that and see you!
03:02Not in love!
03:03Not in love for anyone!
03:03Not in love for me!
03:04She said so!
03:05Not in love for me!
03:06Leave me alone!
03:08Leave me alone!
03:09She thinks you're stupid stupid!
03:11Come on down here, you stupid little son!
03:15You don't stop behaving yourself!
03:16You don't stop behaving yourself!
03:18No, he laughs at me!
03:19He laughs at me!
03:20He said so!
03:20Poor little darling, mama, mama, poor little darling, mama, mama, just like a woman when you
03:33have grown old, you'll be neglected and left in the car, you'll be neglected.
03:48And left in the car, you'll be neglected and left in the car.
04:19And left in the car, you've neglected and left in the car.
04:30Oh, I'm sorry!
04:46Tell Mr. Reynolds it'll be all right now.
04:49Thank goodness.
04:51Join us over the road at the King's Head.
04:54I think we deserve a pint, Richard.
04:56Yeah, thanks. I'll see you over there.
04:58Do you think we should all tell Mr. Rollington about him?
05:00That won't be necessary. He's got eyes.
05:03And a temper.
05:04I don't like you anymore
05:07You'll be sorry when you see me
05:09Swinging on our garden door
05:12You can't hold it down our rainbow
05:14You can't hold our apple tree
05:17I don't want to play in your yard
05:20If you won't be good to me
05:50Which one are you?
05:53What are you talking about?
05:57Three of you here, isn't there?
05:59Ollerton, Mapes and Earncastle
06:02I'm Earncastle
06:03The other two are still in bed
06:06Caught at last, are we?
06:07Superintendent here wants to see you
06:08Ten o'clock sharp on the stage of the palace
06:10Shall I go up and tell the other two adieu?
06:13I'll go
06:15Strongton won't pray for the police
06:16Unless they give him some reason
06:18There's been a body found
06:19You'll all be told
06:26A body found?
06:28We'll all be told about it
06:30By the big chief, I suppose
06:33Where's Sissy?
06:34She's probably sitting on the WC
06:36Having a good cry
06:38She's sentimental and constipated
06:40So she spends a lot of time there
06:43I wish you'd told that poppy to come up here
06:45I'd have got more out of it
06:46A body found
06:49That isn't enough
06:53They're calling everyone on the bill
06:54To assemble on stage
06:55That must mean the body was found in the palace
06:57I'd already worked that out for myself
06:59Thank you, Sherlock Holmes
07:02It might possibly be one in the company
07:05Well, they're stagehands down there
07:06They've been dead for years
07:07And nobody's noticed
07:10Right
07:11I'll bring Sissy
07:23The body that had been found
07:26Belonged to Noni Colmar
07:28The young French acrobat
07:31Somebody had strangled her
07:32Right
07:32You
07:35This is the second time
07:36I've had these Colmars going round with me
07:38That girl looked a ripe little piece
07:40In her stage costume
07:41And she was very fond of pushing out her tits
07:43And wagging her ass at any man
07:46Ask that lad
07:47Richard
07:50My impression
07:52It's only a guess
07:54She didn't get much chance
07:56Outside to be with men
07:59Her uncle and the other two wouldn't let her
08:01So she made the most of her chances backstage
08:02To amuse herself
08:05She was a bit of a teaser
08:06If you know
08:06And she teased somebody once too often
08:09So we needn't waste too much time
08:11With the stage staff
08:12I wouldn't have anything to tease
08:15Right
08:16Thank you very much, gentlemen
08:21I'm going to see the manager
08:22Unless he can find a good fill-in farce
08:24We'll all have to spread our axe tonight
08:26And that'll take rehearsal
08:29Go and wait with Sissy
08:31Can I give her a drink around the corner?
08:33She probably needs one
08:35Or you do
08:36Go on with you
08:50Look, it only happened last night
08:52For God's sake
08:52Ladies and gentlemen
08:53Please, how are we doing?
08:54I'm going off the way to the left.
08:56Careful, change the world at the very name.
09:00Damn, vultures.
09:23I don't understand you, Richard.
09:26You're a nice boy, sensitive, artistic and all that.
09:30You should be feeling how horrible this all is.
09:33Why aren't you?
09:35I am, really.
09:37It's not so bloody strange and unnatural,
09:40with people like those reporters around.
09:41Nick would never let on that anything could upset him, ever.
09:45Whatever happens, he's always seen something ten times worse
09:48in Berlin or somewhere.
09:57All right, Nick?
09:59Now, sissy...
10:00It's all right for you men.
10:02Nobody tried to strangle you.
10:05If they don't catch you, did it?
10:08It might be my turn next week.
10:10Stop it!
10:10You don't know what it's like being a girl.
10:13You feel so helpless.
10:16You can think you're alone with a nice man.
10:19Suddenly you see a look in his heart.
10:21Makes your blood run cold.
10:25Now we know we're going round with a murderer.
10:29Until they catch him.
10:31I'm not going to trust any man on a billion inch.
10:34Not one inch.
10:34If any of them stops me in a dark alley,
10:36I'll scream the place down.
10:56I need a drink.
10:58What was the matter, Nick?
11:01Not another horrible murder.
11:04Something much worse.
11:07What?
11:10What?
11:14The manager's already booked a fill-in.
11:16An Irish tenor from Manchester.
11:19Nick.
11:20You are hard.
11:22We'll be packed out tonight, you'll see.
11:25As soon as the English go to music halls,
11:27they love the Irish.
11:29I'll have a large scotch.
11:39I love the dear silver that shines in your hair.
11:45And the brow that's all furrowed and wrinkled with care.
11:51I kiss the dear fingers so toil-worn for me.
11:58Oh, God bless you and keep you, Mother McQueen.
12:15I love you and keep you with your hair.
12:17I love you and keep you with your hair.
12:37And the way I live is so guilty.
12:37And the way I live is so guilty.
12:37And, you know, it's so guilty.
13:13I'm so frightened, Richard, dear.
13:17And he doesn't care.
13:20Let me stay a bit, please.
13:23I'm just waiting to hold me.
13:26Just tell me it's all right.
13:30I haven't come for that.
13:32I'm too frightened.
13:34Of course, I know what it's like.
13:37A man holding a girl.
13:40A man holding a girl.
13:41I don't care.
13:43Just as long as you can for me.
13:46Sissy, this is a bad idea.
13:48It won't work.
13:51You'll be sorry in the morning.
13:52I don't care about the morning.
13:54I'm sorry, but I don't want you here.
13:57For your own sake, as well as mine.
14:00But it's...
14:02But he understands.
14:07He understands all right.
14:10He understands very well.
14:13Get out.
14:15Out!
14:26She thought I was asleep.
14:29Don't be too hard on her, Uncle.
14:30She really is scared out of her wits.
14:33She never had any.
14:35And if she's so scared, she'll be glad she's going.
14:38She finishes on Saturday.
14:41No argument.
14:59I desperately didn't want Sissy to leave the company.
15:03She was a real friend.
15:05Genuine and warm-hearted.
15:06Not somebody sinister or murderous.
15:08Uncle Nick!
15:11Don't make a final decision for 24 hours.
15:13I made up my mind some time ago.
15:15She's too fat.
15:15She's slowing down the box and pedestal effect.
15:18But don't you think if she's going, Richard,
15:20at the end of next week,
15:22I'll get in someone who used to work for me.
15:24Morning, gentlemen.
15:26Just a couple of questions before you get too busy.
15:29I'm busy now.
15:34What's the matter with him?
15:36He's sacked Miss Mames.
15:38Oh, dear.
15:39And where is Miss Mames at this moment?
15:42Still hiding her misery in bed.
16:06So if you had to guess, who would it be?
16:10Heavens, I don't know.
16:12Mr. Mergan and Miss Ferris.
16:15Would you say they were popular members of your company?
16:18No, I wouldn't.
16:23Well, some have mentioned the dwarf.
16:26Barney.
16:28I'm sorry.
16:29Did you say something?
16:30No.
16:32He did fool around with her now and again.
16:34He's a silly little man.
16:36He went off early with Sam and Ben Hayes.
16:39That's right.
16:40So he did.
16:42Any others?
16:46Duffield, perhaps.
16:47One of the three Americans.
16:49That's sheer prejudice.
16:53What I've been wondering, Inspector, is how you're going to continue your inquiries.
16:56Move to Preston on Sunday.
16:59Blackpool the following week.
17:01Oh, we know that, young man.
17:03That's the chief reason we're calling in the yard.
17:06I can't say I'm sorry.
17:09Ten to one, you'll get Inspector Crab.
17:12Now, he's a terror.
17:15Doesn't look like a crab, but behaves like one.
17:19Moves sideways.
17:21Then, all of a sudden, it's a pinch.
17:25Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
17:56Darling Richard, I'm sorry to have gone without saying goodbye to you and giving you a last kiss, but I
18:04can't stand it anymore and I've got to go now.
18:07There's nowhere to go but back home.
18:11You're such a nice, dear boy.
18:14And I don't mind your being standoffish with me, because I knew all the time you were really in love
18:19with Nancy Ellis, even though she's obviously not in love with you.
18:24Well, she can't be, can she?
18:29Don't forget me, because I am a true friend.
18:33And perhaps a bit more.
18:37Love, Sissy.
19:06Vindictive little bitch.
19:10She gets her money, an extra week, too, and off she goes, deliberately leaving us in the cart for tomorrow.
19:16That's a woman for you, lad.
19:17You can't trust her in my bloody yard.
19:20She knew damn well I'd arranged for Doris Tindley to join us at Bristol on Sunday,
19:24and hadn't the hope of getting her here before, so off she goes without a word.
19:27Female spiked.
19:28No loyalty!
19:29Uncle.
19:33Well, you'll have to get hold of Sam and Ben and Barney.
19:36We'll put a lot of old material back in and do without her.
19:44Oh, wish to God I'd never set eyes on this bloody town.
19:58I tried to shake myself free of the pervading, enervating gloom by inventing a new trick, the magic painting.
20:05As for Uncle Nick, he was morose and silent.
20:10The truth was, though, he'd never have admitted it, even under torture.
20:13He was feeling lost without Sissy.
20:17He'd neglected her and treated her badly at times.
20:20But he missed her ego-flattering, intensely feminine companionship.
20:29He was not to find similar qualities in Sissy's replacement.
20:34Doris Tindley was the angriest person I've ever known.
20:39She was permanently angry.
20:41What about the box?
20:42What about it?
20:43I've already told you, I didn't have a money or a bailiff.
20:45Yes, I know, but that is dangerous.
20:47I mean, I could have been hurt, and they don't seem to know what they're doing.
20:50I mean, my God, this act's gone to the dog since I was last around.
20:54Doris, I don't think you...
20:55Oh, you too, Nick Arliff, and you haven't improved.
20:56Come on now, let's start from the top.
20:58Listen, you, could you possibly get that tempo right?
21:02Come on, let's start.
21:03Come on.
21:04Where are you going?
21:18Mrs. Tindley, should I like to come for a drink?
21:19Who's paying?
21:21I'll pay you, Mrs. Tindley.
21:22Oh, don't call me that.
21:23It sounds so damn silly.
21:24You're a, what's it, Richard, Dick, and I'm Doris.
21:26You can call me Doris.
21:28That doesn't mean to say I'm going to spend any money on you and these ridiculous pro bars.
21:31Signed photos of great artists, I don't think.
21:34All powers of the landlord, I also don't think.
21:37You can buy me just one scotch and splash, and don't imagine I'm joining in any rounds.
21:42I'm here to save money.
21:44Well, last night, I beat that woman my days down to 19 balls for the week.
21:48That's bed, proper breakfast, and a hot supper.
21:50And I'd have got her done to set up in a stick if it hadn't been time.
21:53I mean, it can be done, you know, if you set your mind...
21:55Hello, Harry.
21:56Oh, it's for me, is it?
21:57Oh, it's Millie Barris, isn't it?
21:58Hello, Millie Barris.
21:59I suppose you think she's a monger.
22:01No, I don't.
22:02This might be.
22:02Oh, that's right.
22:03Oh, good.
22:03So do I.
22:04On and off the stage.
22:06Absolutely.
22:07We're in.
22:07We're in.
22:07We're in.
22:08We're in.
22:10We're in.
22:10I don't like smut.
22:19Hello.
22:20Now, what is all this about a murder?
22:23I asked Nick, but he didn't seem to want to talk about it.
22:26Did it himself, perhaps?
22:27Come on, come on, tell me.
22:29Surely you've read about it.
22:30I have, indeed.
22:31Nonny Colmore wasn't recalled.
22:33But what else?
22:36Well, the police have called in Scotland Yard, and we're all to be interviewed again by
22:39Inspector Crouch.
22:41You can't drag me into it.
22:42I haven't worked for Nick Ollivan for three years, and only left to marry Archie Tingley.
22:47More for me.
22:48If the man who did it's one of those sex maniacs I saw at the band call, I'm not surprised.
22:53Just let them try any funny business with me, that's all.
22:56Just let them try laying a finger on me, that's all.
22:59One night, when a certain comedian tried some hanky-panky, I kicked him right in his best
23:05joke.
23:05Well, he hasn't forgotten that.
23:07I'll be bound.
23:08I'll tell you what variety's full of, mostly.
23:11Riff-raff.
23:12Just downright common riff-raff, earning ten times as much money as they're worth.
23:16Some of them.
23:17I agree.
23:19Right, come on, then.
23:28Well, didn't you miss the variety stage, were you there?
23:30I missed it.
23:31Not a bit of it.
23:32But he married to Archie Tingley for the variety stage for me.
23:35He's in and out of more jobs than any other man in England.
23:39When people ask me what he's doing, I have to think, and even then I'm sometimes two jobs
23:43behind.
23:45He can get almost any job he wants.
23:47But as soon as he's started, either he can't keep it, or he doesn't like it.
23:51And what do I say?
23:52Nothing.
23:53Well, hardly anything.
23:55He twists me all the time around his little finger.
23:57I wish to God I'd married a steady man I didn't much like.
24:01What job's he doing at the moment, Doris?
24:03Oh, for heaven's sake, Richard, have a bit of wit.
24:05I've just told you that's the kind of question I hate.
24:07He's selling some.
24:09Turkish tobacco or electrical fittings or bicycles.
24:13He can't even ride one.
24:15Jerry, he'll tell us himself when he gets here tomorrow.
24:18I don't know about you.
24:22But I'm off.
24:34Archie's here.
24:35If you've nothing better to do, you might as well come and have a look at him.
24:41Mr. Hearncastle, what a delight for me, my dear fellow.
24:44How do you do?
24:45Your uncle doesn't care for me, you know.
24:46I suppose because I stole Doris away from him.
24:48Yeah, well, that helped, but he wouldn't like you any.
24:50I don't know why anyone does.
24:51I'm sure you and I will get along famously.
24:53Will you have a drink, please?
24:53No, you're not starting that.
24:55For is.
24:55Please remember, I've come over 200,000.
24:57Yeah, to see a man about a job, you told me so.
24:59I came to see you, my dear.
25:00I've been missing you terribly.
25:02And now when I suggest a friendly drink.
25:05Well, all right.
25:06But just one.
25:07Um, right, I'll call a taxi.
25:09Did he say a taxi?
25:11That man, I can't imagine how I'd put up with him.
25:14Not that he's not better than most of you.
25:16I mean, he does try to please.
25:18Not like most men who would think they're doing you a favour just by yawning or blowing smoke
25:22in your face.
25:22And it's not Turkish tobacco or bicycles, but boats now.
25:26Boats!
25:27I ask you.
25:28What sort?
25:29Oh, little boats for Park Lakes.
25:31And I doubt if he's ever been in one in all of his life.
25:33He gets talking to this fella in an expensive saloon bar, and within half an hour, he's bought
25:3850 boats with money he hasn't got.
25:41I mean, one time, I just stopped him from buying 7,000 roller skates.
25:44I don't care for him.
25:46I don't care for him at all.
25:48I'm stuck with a mountain.
25:49I don't care for him at all.
26:45Richard, there are one or two things you should know about me.
26:49My interests are far and wide, but not deep.
26:52Oh, you can bet your boots on that.
26:54I try this, that, and the other, and why?
26:57For two good reasons.
26:59First, I'm accumulating experience, giving me, well, an insight.
27:05Oh, into what?
27:06Secondly, I'm waiting for the proper moment to enter the moving picture business.
27:11Not at the producing end, oh no, but at the distributing, exhibiting stage.
27:20I want to be in a position to meet the demand for moving pictures, which is about to grow
27:25and grow.
27:26Richard, I assure you, nothing can stop them.
27:29Doris doesn't understand the position because, in some respect, she's high bar.
27:33His husband's bar, you mean?
27:34My dear, I'm talking to Richard, not only because I like him, but to be perfectly frank,
27:38because I hope he'll pass some of this on to his Uncle Nikolajan, who might just be wondering
27:43what to do with his money.
27:46It's absolutely inevitable.
27:47What is?
27:48Moving pictures will go up and up, variety, down and down.
27:54Oh, nonsense.
27:55The end of an era.
27:56You mark my words.
28:04Oh, aren't you listening?
28:06Charlie Pierce is rehearsing a new musical comedy.
28:08The girl in the band.
28:10One of our dear old pals.
28:11Oh, we must get to see it.
28:13Opening shortly at the region, Tom Bowen, Gertie Mae, Nancy Ellis, Charles Pierce.
28:17Did you say Nancy Ellis?
28:19Know her?
28:20Of course he knows her.
28:21Just look at him.
28:23Aha!
28:25Stop it, Archie.
28:26You sound like a billy goat.
28:28Well, Richard?
28:30She and her sister were touring with us until they went into pantomime.
28:33Goodness.
28:35I'm wondering what happened to her.
28:36And she been wandering, too?
28:39I don't know.
28:40Well, if she hasn't, she ought to have a bedroom worth ten of her.
28:44All right, ladies and gentlemen.
28:46How do you work now?
28:46Bring the children, ladies.
28:48How do you work now?
28:50In ten years' time, Doris will be riding behind a chauffeur in a big car.
28:55Oh, you daft idiot.
28:56I'll probably be running a lodging house,
28:58and you'll be doing the washing up and cleaning the shoes.
29:00The only moving pictures you'll be able to afford
29:02is what the butlers saw on the pier promenade.
29:04Daughty.
29:05Archie.
29:13Dear Nancy,
29:16I've just heard that you are rehearsing at the Regent,
29:20so this ought to reach you quite soon.
29:24If you've ever sent any replies to my letters,
29:28I've never had them.
29:31I shall not write again after this.
29:35But it wouldn't hurt to send me a line.
29:38Even a postcard.
29:42To tell me you are not interested.
29:46Then perhaps I could stop thinking about you.
29:52For the next three weeks,
29:54I shall be at the Palace Blackpool.
29:58Yours,
30:00very sincerely,
30:02Richard Hencastle.
30:23I've been to Blackpool before,
30:24on holiday.
30:26And possibly that was the trouble.
30:29From the first,
30:30it felt strange to be working there instead of playing.
30:33To breathe the strong sea air,
30:35and yet not be rushing across the promenade to the sands.
30:38A carefree boy again.
30:41Strange and melancholy.
30:44I didn't belong to the bustling crowds of holidaymakers.
30:48In fact,
30:49I felt as depressed there
30:50as I had done in grim, scowling Burrington.
30:54Or was it simply that the perceptions and events in Burrington
30:56were crawling from under their stone again.
31:02in the scowling Blan есть,
31:15where he saw the
31:16all the things I did in Monaten
31:17didn't go out.
31:17I don't care but if she wears scares me too
31:28much,
31:28that's different.
31:34Nancy hadn't replied, of course, either.
31:37And to cap everything, we were staying in a boarding house full of strangers.
31:42Their cheerful bonhomie grated as much as that of the crowds outside.
31:46And there was a coolness between us which took a long time to thaw.
31:58So softly calm and cold, though the heart will remain deadly and long.
32:10Till the night of twilight comes last of the sun, and last of the sweet sun.
32:57Now, let me see. What's your name?
33:01Mine's Crab, by the way.
33:04Ah, so you've heard of me.
33:07I'm Richard Hancusel.
33:08That's right, so you are.
33:09Ah, the Ganga Dunn Company.
33:12Well, you've done what you have to do here, haven't you?
33:15What do you usually do now?
33:16Not a drink. I'll go for a walk.
33:18I'll tell you what we'll do, Mr. Hancusel.
33:20If you have no objection, we'll do both.
33:26Very well.
33:33Wonderful air here, isn't it?
33:35I don't like this place.
33:37Never did as soon as I had any sense.
33:39It was one big money trap around with idiots and sharpers.
33:43The air's wonderful.
33:45Shouldn't be, but it is.
33:47A pity we can't pipe it into Westminster.
33:51Do you know what all this does to me, Mr. Earncarson?
33:54Frightening.
33:56Do you understand that?
34:01I called at your boarding house this morning.
34:03I spoke to Mr. Ollenton.
34:05Your uncle, I believe.
34:06He said you'd be at the palace.
34:08That's all he did say.
34:10He didn't express any opinion about a crime.
34:12Shut me up.
34:13Shut himself up.
34:14Why should he do that?
34:16You don't think he's a suspicious character, do you?
34:19I think everybody's a suspicious character, Mr. Earncarson.
34:23I have enough suspicion in me to choke a horse.
34:28Uncle Nick's a very clever man.
34:31He's also very proud, and he's in the mystery business.
34:33Have you done that?
34:35So far, this murder's a mystery bigger than any of his.
34:38This one's a real thing.
34:43If he could solve it, he's all fast enough.
34:46But it baffles him.
34:48The great Nick Ollenton.
34:51So he won't even discuss it.
34:53Very neat.
34:54You might be right.
34:55And again, you might not.
34:57Forgive me.
35:06Well, it isn't Spider Evans.
35:09Oh, hello, Inspector.
35:10You wouldn't be working up here, would you, Spider?
35:13No, I wouldn't.
35:15I just don't know how it's, I.
35:16It's time to see everybody else here.
35:19Not everybody's, Spider.
35:20I've only been here since last night,
35:22and I've spotted six or seven white boys I know
35:24without even looking for them.
35:25So watch it, Spider.
35:27Just play on the sounds.
35:30Here, what does he want?
35:31Nothing.
35:31He's far, me love.
35:32Here, you up to something?
35:35No, no.
35:39I'll be watching your show tonight.
35:41And many other nights, too.
35:43And they'll be round at the back.
35:45Because after all, there you all are.
35:49And one of you did it.
35:51No, it wasn't me.
35:54But you'd like this case solved and done with, wouldn't you?
35:58You were all I'd better talk to.
36:00You follow?
36:04I don't really know the others on the bill.
36:06I see very little of them.
36:08Stand-offish, are you, Mr. Hearncastle?
36:11I don't think so.
36:14On an earlier tour.
36:18Different people, well.
36:20Made a lot of friends.
36:21But not this time, eh?
36:23That's the sort of thing I like to know.
36:26Very helpful.
36:58Even in life, there's a beautiful star.
37:01One for whom in vain you sigh.
37:05You're of lonely birth.
37:07Just a thing of birth.
37:10While the star shines in fortune's eye.
37:17Shine, oh, bright star.
37:21Softly in the sky, you're beaming.
37:25Shine, oh, bright star.
37:29For your tender love I sigh.
37:33Shine, oh, bright star.
37:37Of you I am fondly dreaming.
37:41Listen to the wail of the night in the day.
37:49Star of the Eastern.
37:57Star of the Eastern.
38:00Star of the Eastern.
38:03Star of the Eastern.
38:06Star of the Eastern.
38:16Star of the Eastern.
38:18Star of the Eastern.
38:19Star of the Eastern.
38:21Star of the Eastern.
38:21Star of the Eastern.
38:22Star of the Eastern.
38:22What did he say to you after that, then?
38:27Ham, again.
38:29There must be more ham eating in this town than any place in the world.
38:34Perhaps it's ham that makes them so stupid.
38:37Tonight's audience was the stupidest I've ever known.
38:39Talk about dense.
38:41Poor Sid Baxter.
38:43He's our comic.
38:44Was down to making mother-in-law gags and kippers and WC jokes.
38:48It must wreck his heart.
38:49Peggy, I didn't tell you.
38:50When he came up after the sketch, he coughed and coughed and there was blood on his handkerchief.
38:55Well, Lorna, that's his wife.
38:58Our vocalist.
39:00She was terribly upset.
39:02She started crying in the dressing room.
39:06I don't like life.
39:08I've tried it and I don't like it.
39:13Couple of glasses, Richard.
39:15And perhaps these young ladies will take a glass of champagne with me.
39:18Oh, thanks very much, Mr. Ollinson.
39:22Oh, I could just do with one.
39:23So could I.
39:25What about it then, Mr. Ollinson?
39:28You're a star-turned, booked up for years.
39:30Loads of money.
39:32I suppose you think life's wonderful.
39:34Well, I don't dislike life like you do.
39:37But there's nothing wonderful about it.
39:39Most of the time it's like living with a lion.
39:41And one day you make it jump through the hoops.
39:43But get careless.
39:45It'll have you in a corner tearing an arm off.
39:49I'll tell the truth.
39:51To hell with girlish reticence.
39:53I can bang and rattle on a piano for hours.
39:56Keep a couch.
39:57Cook.
39:58Scrub.
39:58Sew if I have to.
40:00And I'm not afraid to take my clothes off.
40:02Darling, what's this?
40:06Sorry, Miss Camford.
40:07But to begin with, I'm married already.
40:09We could live in sin.
40:11You wouldn't suit me.
40:12You're too intelligent.
40:13This is your chance, Maisie.
40:16Why don't you like intelligent women?
40:18Not to live with.
40:19Richard here's different.
40:21He's too young.
40:22He wasn't for a certain West End actress I could name.
40:25Shut up, Uncle.
40:33They should never have booked us into this monkey house.
40:36At least they're cheerful monkeys.
40:38That Inspector Crabb got hold of you, I imagine.
40:41Yeah.
40:42He wanted to discourage that.
40:44And do his own work.
40:46We didn't kill her.
40:48Who did?
41:00I don't know.
41:02I don't know much care either.
41:05By the way, I almost forgot.
41:08You know that dwarf I picked out at Joe Bersenby's?
41:11Philip Tubian, the serious one.
41:14Yeah.
41:14Had a wire to say he's arriving tomorrow.
41:16His train gets in at four.
41:18I want you to meet him.
41:21Have you worked out the two-dwarf effect?
41:24Give me time, lad.
41:27No.
41:29I just thought it might be safer for us to have another dwarf.
41:34He can take over one or two of Barney's jobs if Barney gets any more unreliable.
41:39Barney will yell his head off.
41:40It's difficult enough as it is.
41:41I know, yes.
41:42Don't tell me my job.
41:44But with a rival, he'll sharpen up his P's and Q's in five minutes.
41:47You'll see.
41:54You're half asleep, lad.
41:57Get to bed.
42:12Good afternoon, Mr. Tubey.
42:14It's Perkastle.
42:15It's very kind of you to meet me.
42:16Not at all.
42:18Can I carry that bag?
42:19No, that's extremely kind, but I think I can manage quite well.
42:22Shall we say the grip?
42:23I think that might be a good idea.
42:29Tell me, Mr. Hercastle, have you any idea what's been planned for me?
42:33No, I don't, Mr. Tubey.
42:34No doubt my uncle will explain.
42:54Have you been to Blackpool before?
42:56Yes, I did a season here quite a few years ago at the Tower Circus, running on and falling
43:02about in between the acts with the clowns, to amuse the children.
43:07I'm very fond of children.
43:08I like to hear them laughing, but not the others.
43:12Certainly not the others.
43:15I'm a serious man, and I think life's a very serious business.
43:18And a whole town lending itself to frivolity and greed, foolishness.
43:25Can that be a good thing for our country, I ask myself?
43:28Invariably, I reply, no, Philip, it certainly cannot.
43:33Oh, by the way, I have a message for you from my uncle.
43:38I'm seeing him at half past eleven tomorrow morning at this address.
43:41If you could be on time, my uncle seems to think it's very important.
43:44Well, if it's important to Mr. Alton, it's certainly important to me.
43:51I'm looking forward to working with Mr. Alton.
43:53He's very much respected in the profession.
43:56Do you know this Mrs. Shuro I'm going to be lodging with?
43:59No, but, er, I believe my uncle knows her.
44:02The town's full of me, Mr. Vastra, if she could find a bed for you.
44:05I appreciate that very much, Mr. Hercaster.
44:08It's most considerable.
44:25Mr. Shuro, my name's Hercaster.
44:28Oh, Nicollerton's nephew, isn't it?
44:31Pleased to meet you.
44:33Come in.
44:34And this must be the little...
44:35Mr. Tooby.
44:36Pleased to meet you.
44:38Come in.
44:39It's just a small attic room, Mr. Tooby, but it's clean and comfortable.
44:42And it's just what I'm looking for, thank you, Mrs. Shuro.
44:46This is Max, my husband.
44:48He may have overheard us having a few words.
44:50Pleased to meet you, Mr. Shuro.
44:52I'll take you in true room, Mr. Tooby.
44:54Leave your case here for Max.
44:56You can let off steam talking to this young man.
44:59This way, Mr. Tooby.
45:00He very can.
45:02Come to here, young man.
45:05You wish a glass of beer?
45:07Er, no, thanks.
45:09Then excuse me.
45:11I'm very thirsty.
45:13After shouting with my wife,
45:15I'll make a big argument.
45:21I say we leave this country.
45:24We get out quick.
45:26Not to Germany or Ramazan, beloved here.
45:30But to Holland or Switzerland, Denmark, Sweden.
45:34What's wrong with this country?
45:37Sometimes.
45:39Perhaps I tell you what is wrong with this country.
45:43But now I wish to leave.
45:45I wish to go to one of those places.
45:48Because soon here will be war.
45:53Yes.
45:54Yes.
45:55War.
45:56War.
45:57War.
46:01Our Duke Francis Ferdinand is assassinated at Sarajevo.
46:06Have you seen?
46:07I've heard about you, yeah.
46:09I have worked in Vienna.
46:11I have worked in Budapest.
46:14I think about international affairs.
46:19Austria will ask too much of the Serbs.
46:22And there will be war.
46:25There's always some sort of war down there.
46:29Down there?
46:31It is not down there.
46:33It will be here.
46:38Why do you think I tell my wife we must go?
46:43It will not be a little war.
46:47I do not mean a little war.
46:52Fifty years have been spent making Europe into explosive.
46:57Five days will be enough to blow it into pieces.
47:02Oh, do stop it, Max, for goodness sake.
47:05And take poor little Mr. Tooby's case up to him.
47:08Doesn't be useful for a change.
47:10Holland, Switzerland, Denmark, Sweden.
47:14I heard him going on at you just now.
47:17There's not a nicer kind of man than my, Max.
47:20But you will go on and on about all this foreign politics.
47:24What Austria said to Italy, what Germany's going to say to Russia.
47:28Just as if there were all a lot of quarrelsome people in next street.
47:32Listen, poor little Mr. Tooby's getting it now.
47:36He's like I'll be with him.
47:38I wish he'd take up fretwork and stamps or something instead.
47:42He has two pals at the Metropole.
47:44And some nights they come round here talking at tops of the voices till all hours.
47:48I have to keep knocking on the ceiling to get any sleep at all.
48:14Every damn time you see all those boys marching, I can't stop myself crying.
48:19I ought to put my head in a bag.
48:20Please, why?
48:22We haven't started yet, Doris.
48:24There'll be plenty of crime before we're out of this.
48:29See that poster there, Richard?
48:30The Kitchener wants you.
48:33What do you say to that?
49:11There were echoes in what Max Schroer had said.
49:14Of the dire prophecies of Uncle Nick's old Hindu.
49:18He had foretold of rivers and oceans of blood.
49:21And he had insisted that it was exactly what we wanted.
49:39¶¶
49:59VIOLIN PLAYS
50:35VIOLIN PLAYS
51:00VIOLIN PLAYS
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