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TVTranscript
00:02Seatbelts everyone! Please let this be a normal field trip with a frizz?
00:07No way!
00:08Cruisin' on down main street, you're relaxin', feelin' good
00:13Next thing that you know you'll seein'
00:17Octopus in the neighborhood
00:19Surfin' on a sound wave, swingin' through the stars
00:22Take a lap at your intestine
00:24Take your second right past Mars
00:26Climb on the magic school bus
00:28Affigate a nostril
00:30Climb on the magic school bus
00:32Spank a plankton too
00:34On our magic school bus
00:36Wrap the river of lava
00:38On the magic school bus
00:40Such a fine thing to do
00:42So strap your bones right to the seat
00:45Come on in and don't be shy
00:47Just to make your day complete
00:49You might get baked into a pie
00:51On the magic school bus
00:53Step inside, it's a wild ride
00:56Come on!
00:57Right on the magic school bus
00:59Come on!
01:00Come on!
01:11Right on the magic school bus
01:12Arnold, that's brilliant!
01:14It is?
01:15Yeah, Miss Frizzle said to bring in something to help answer the question, what happens to the food we eat?
01:23Oh, right!
01:25What did I bring?
01:26Your own mouth!
01:28Chewing!
01:29It's the first step in...
01:30In...
01:31Digestion!
01:32Yeah, yeah, we know Dorothy Ann
01:34But my buddy Arnold here is not chewing food, he's chewing gum!
01:38Gum?
01:39Yep!
01:40Been chewing for 2 hours and 24 minutes
01:43Only 6 hours and 46 minutes to go before he breaks the school gum chewing record
01:48But Wanda, what's chewing gum got to do with digestion?
01:53Nothing!
01:54But the first one to break the gum chewing record wins 2 free tickets to...
01:58Action Mountain!
02:00The wildest, scariest, best scream your lungs out ride in the world!
02:04The ride of my dreams!
02:07Let's get the facts!
02:08Arnold wants to go on the fastest, the scariest, the best scream your lungs out ride in the world?
02:14Arnold?
02:15You feel alright, Arnold?
02:17Actually, my ticket's up for grabs.
02:19I'm just, uh, helping Wanda out.
02:21I would have done the chewing myself, but I got a new filling.
02:25See?
02:26Ahhhh!
02:28Ahhhh!
02:31Ahhhh!
02:32Ahhhh!
02:32Ahhhh!
02:33Ahhhh!
02:33Ahhhh!
02:34Ahhhh!
02:34Ahhhh!
02:34Ahhhh!
02:35Ahhhh!
02:36Ahhhh!
02:41Ahhhh!
02:47Now that's more like it!
02:51Was that in the lesson plan?
02:53As I always say, no guts, no digestion.
02:57Well, as I always say, no chewing, no free tickets!
03:02Come on Arnold, chew!
03:04Chew Arnold!
03:06Um, Wanda?
03:07I think I, uh, uh, swallowed it.
03:11Very funny, Arnold. You're kidding, right?
03:14See ya!
03:17Arnold, how could you?
03:19Wanda, I...
03:20We were going to ride Action Mountain together.
03:23You didn't do it on purpose, did you?
03:27No, no, it was an accident, really.
03:29I'm sorry, Wanda. I told you breaking records made me nervous.
03:33I told you I've never won anything in my life.
03:35Never say never, Arnold.
03:37I told you you should have picked someone else.
03:40Oh, hey, Arnold, that's okay.
03:42I mean, it's only a ride.
03:46And that's the end of that.
03:49Actually, Wanda, it's only the beginning.
03:52Of what?
03:53Our next field trip.
03:56Field trip!
03:58Field trip.
04:00Miss Frizzle, I'd really love to go on a field trip, but...
04:04But I've got this weird feeling.
04:06I mean, I already ruined Wanda's day.
04:08What if I ruin everybody else's?
04:11Well, Arnold, I do need a volunteer to stay behind.
04:15Stay behind?
04:16Come on, go!
04:18Me! Me! Pick me!
04:20Well, thank you, Arnold.
04:22All right!
04:23Wait a minute.
04:24This is too good to be true.
04:26What's the catch?
04:28Meet your substitute teacher.
04:30Liz?
04:31Uh, could be worse.
04:34See you very soon, Arnold.
04:41One field trip for them, one bag of Cheesy Wheezies for me.
04:46Hmm.
04:47Our timing should be just about right.
04:53I don't get it.
04:55I thought we were supposed to answer the question about what happens to the food we eat.
05:00Yeah.
05:01Where are we going?
05:02Not far, class.
05:03Not far at all.
05:05Here we go!
05:15Whoops.
05:18Whoa!
05:25Where are we?
05:28Check out the pink pavement.
05:30The walls are dripping.
05:32You know what, Miss Frizzle?
05:34At my old school, we turn back in this kind of weather.
05:39What are those humongle white things?
05:43Whoa!
05:44If you ask me, they're humongle bus crushers.
05:47Actually, Ralphie, they're more like humongle food crushers.
05:53Wait a minute.
05:54If that's food, we're either on the weirdest cutting board in the world
05:58or in somebody's mouth.
06:01Eww!
06:02Bingo.
06:03But not just anybody's mouth.
06:09Look familiar?
06:11Arnold?
06:16Boy, it's kind of empty in here.
06:19I wonder where they went.
06:22Well, wherever they are, they don't have me to slow them down anymore.
06:28Hmm.
06:30Ah, nothing like cheesy wheezy's with a green olive chaser.
06:41So the first thing that happens to the food when it gets digested
06:46is that she's cut and grinded into smaller pieces.
06:50At my old school, we were never allowed to be digested.
06:54Never say never, Phoebe.
06:56But according to my research, after chewing comes swallowing.
07:02I call it action, Arnold.
07:06The wildest, scariest.
07:08Best scream your lungs out ride in the world.
07:12Wahoo!
07:13Wahoo!
07:18Class, welcome to the esophagus.
07:21The asparagus?
07:23No, Carlos.
07:25The esophagus.
07:26It's where your food goes after you swallow.
07:29Ah.
07:31Miss Frizzle, what are you doing?
07:34Time to let Arnold's digestive system do the driving.
07:38Cool.
07:39It's like we're driving through a tunnel, but the tunnel's driving us.
07:43Hey, Arnold, how about a push?
07:46I wonder if this is what it feels like to get squeezed out of a tube of toothpaste.
07:53Yeah, but I get the feeling we're not going to end up on Arnold's toothbrush.
07:57Oh, right you are, Tim.
07:59The esophagus connects the mouth to the...
08:01Anyone?
08:03I don't know how much more of this I can stomach.
08:07Excellent, Ralphie.
08:08The stomach is the next step in digestion.
08:11And it's a real doozy!
08:20In just a few moments, we'll be landing in Arnold's stomach.
08:24Thank you for flying Digestion Airways.
08:29Now that's what I call a belly flop.
08:40Olive eating.
08:41Now that's a school record I could go for.
08:50Thanks.
08:53Wanda would be so impressed.
08:56Oh, I know!
08:58Hey, why not?
09:03The all-school record book.
09:05Olive eating.
09:07978?
09:11Okay, it doesn't have to be olives.
09:14Oh, there have to be other records waiting to be broken.
09:19Yo-ho-ho, and the stomach of slop.
09:21Check out the pink cliffs of Arnold.
09:25Ralphie, that's his stomach wall.
09:28Rock, dead ahead!
09:31I bet this is what the Pilgrims felt like before they crashed into Plymouth Rock.
09:35Forget the Pilgrims, the walls are moving.
09:44Hard-up pork, class!
09:50I know Arnold likes rocks, but do you really think he'd swallow one?
09:56That's no rock.
09:57That's Arnold's gum.
10:01Phew, that was close.
10:03Is it just me, or do you get the feeling there's more out there than just food and water?
10:08Whatever it is, it's eating the bus.
10:13Nothing to worry about, just a little stomach acid.
10:17Stomach acid?
10:20Here at United Digestion, we believe in breaking things down.
10:26We start with the raw material of the food, put it in the mouth,
10:30and use the finest teeth in the world to tear, grind,
10:34and crush it into pieces small enough to swallow.
10:37Then the food gets pushed down the esophagus line into stomach central,
10:42where we add acids and other chemicals to break the food down
10:47and dissolve it into a liquid.
10:49And that's only half of what we do here at United Digestion.
10:55Man, when it comes to digestion, Arnold doesn't mess around.
11:00You haven't seen anything yet.
11:03You mean there's more?
11:05Mm-hmm.
11:06All right, Arnold!
11:07If this doesn't impress her, nothing will.
11:11How many more to go, Liz?
11:13One more, and I break the school record for pens stuffed into a pocket protector.
11:27What's that?
11:29Poor Arnold.
11:30Looks like he's got a hole in his stomach.
11:33Not a hole, Keisha.
11:34A valve.
11:35The doorway to his small intestine.
11:40Yeah, well, he just swallowed the gum.
11:43Hey, why hasn't the gum been digested?
11:46A few things are too tough to be broken up and dissolved.
11:50Like school buses, right?
11:53There's only one way to find out.
11:58Here we go!
12:12Where are we?
12:14It looks like Scuba World.
12:17Welcome to the small intestine.
12:19The next step in digestion.
12:21I don't get it.
12:23The food's been dissolved, digested, whatever.
12:26What else is left to do?
12:27As I always say, Ralphie, digested is not delivered.
12:34Anyone for a dip?
12:36Go swimming in Arnold's digestive juice?
12:39Not me, no way.
12:42How was I supposed to know she'd have digestive juice scuba gear?
12:46Isn't this the coolest?
12:48Hey, there's the gum!
12:51I'll be right back.
12:53Hey, look at this!
12:55The dissolved food is disappearing into these rubber cactus-type things.
13:01They're called villi.
13:03Cool.
13:05They're soaking up the food like a sponge.
13:08But where did it go?
13:10Here at United Digestion, what we digest, we deliver.
13:16As the villi and the small intestine soak up the nutrients in the food,
13:20the nutrients are transferred into the bloodstream.
13:24And the bloodstream delivers the nutrients to all parts of the body.
13:28Because here at United Digestion, we believe in turning food into pure.
13:36I get it.
13:38The bloodstream is like a pizza delivery service, only it delivers energy.
13:43Speaking of energy, where's Wanda?
13:49Wanda!
13:51Wanda!
13:58Wanda!
13:58Wanda!
13:59Wanda!
13:59Wanda!
14:00Wanda!
14:01Wanda!
14:01Huh?
14:02Did I do it?
14:05Two minutes and four seconds?
14:07How can I break the school napping record if my stomach keeps waking me up?
14:13Where could she be?
14:14I don't see her anywhere.
14:16Wanda!
14:17Where are you?
14:19Wanda!
14:21We've been through the entire small intestine.
14:24And no sign of her.
14:27There she is!
14:32Ah, she went into the large intestine.
14:35The large intestine?
14:37You mean there's more?
14:39What's that?
14:41Just Arnold's leftovers.
14:44Watch out!
14:55Boy, what a ride!
14:57Talk about action!
14:59Me too!
15:01What's that?
15:02Me too!
15:02Man, if the small intestine was Scuba World, the large intestine is Spell World.
15:10At least it's a lot drier in here.
15:12Yeah.
15:13But where's Wanda?
15:15Wait a minute.
15:18This should work.
15:20Wanda!
15:22If you can hear this, give a shout!
15:27Let's go!
15:28All right!
15:31The further we go, the drier gets.
15:35It looks like the walls are sucking up all the water.
15:42That's the large intestine for you.
15:45It removes the water from the leftovers.
15:48So we have to find Wanda before she gets dried into a raisin.
15:51A raisin?
15:52Cool.
15:53Ralphie!
15:55Um, not cool at all.
15:57Terrible, actually.
15:59Yikes!
16:08One, two, one!
16:20Gotcha!
16:23All right, Carlos.
16:25You saved her.
16:26Saved me?
16:28I was having a blast!
16:31Arnold's digestive system is the wildest, scariest, scream-your-lungs-alright in the world!
16:36And it's not over yet.
16:38We've done the mouth.
16:40We've done the esophagus.
16:41The stomach.
16:42The small intestine.
16:43The large intestine.
16:44What could be next?
16:46The extra-large intestine?
16:48No!
16:49We just have to join the rest of the waste products and finish the trip.
16:53What?
16:55Wait a minute.
16:56According to my research, the waste products go...
17:00Nuh-uh!
17:01No way!
17:02At my old school, we were never allowed to end up in the toilet.
17:06Anyone have a better idea?
17:08We could go back to the mouth and ride it again!
17:11Wanda!
17:13She's right.
17:13We could go back the way we came.
17:15I've been keeping track, and the digestive system is just one long tube divided into parts.
17:20We started off in the mouth, got squeezed down the esophagus, landed in the stomach, got pushed into the small
17:27intestine, and wound up here in the large intestine.
17:29And since we don't want to go out here, all we have to do is go backwards.
17:33We could go back up the large intestine, back to the small intestine, into the stomach, back up the esophagus,
17:40and burst triumphantly up the mouth.
17:42It won't be easy.
17:44You're right, Tim.
17:45Digestion pushes everything down.
17:47We'll have to fight our way back.
17:49We might never make it.
17:51Never say never, Miss Frizzle.
17:57How can I break the record for eating lunch if I can't find my lunch?
18:05Hmm.
18:06I wonder if there's any rules about it having to be my lunch.
18:10A chocolate mallow blaster.
18:14She'll be coming around the mountain when she comes.
18:18Yee-haw!
18:20Full speed ahead!
18:22This is insane!
18:24Consider the alternative.
18:26You know, biking is my favorite sport.
18:31Now!
18:38Oh, so much for the easy part.
18:40The easy part?
18:42Yeah.
18:43Remember all the muscle power that pushed us down the esophagus?
18:46Oh.
18:48And it's almost noon.
18:49If Arnold eats lunch, there's going to be tons of food raining down on us.
18:53If I eat Ralphie's lunch and break the lunch-eating record real fast, Wanda will think I'm the best thing
18:59since Velcro shoe fasteners.
19:00But then Ralphie will be steamed at me for eternity.
19:11What are we going to do?
19:12What are we going to do?
19:13What are we going to do?
19:14Wanda, what are we going to do?
19:18What are we going to do?
19:19I've got it!
19:21But if I don't eat something, I'll wither away to nothing.
19:25I know!
19:27I could eat Ralphie's lunch and think up a good excuse on a full stomach.
19:31Arnold!
19:33What?
19:34I've heard my stomach growl before, but talk?
19:39Arnold!
19:41Are you about to eat Ralphie's mallow blaster?
19:46Uh, no!
19:48I mean, yes!
19:50Yee!
19:50Wait a second!
19:52Who is this?
19:53This is your conscience, Arnold!
19:55You know you shouldn't eat Ralphie's mallow blaster!
20:00Besides, you're not even hungry!
20:05Not hungry?
20:06I could eat a...
20:07You just think you're hungry!
20:09What you really are is thirst-thirsty!
20:13I am?
20:14Trust me, you are!
20:16Now there's a nice bottle of seltzer in Wanda's lunch bag.
20:19That's what you really want!
20:22Uh, okay.
20:24I guess.
20:25Hey, how come it's okay to drink Wanda's seltzer, but it's not okay to eat Ralphie's mallow blaster?
20:32Because Wanda's a far kinder and more generous human being than Ralphie when it comes to sharing.
20:37Then how come when she has a mallow blaster, she hogs it all to herself?
20:42Look, I'm your conscience, all right?
20:44Just do what I say and drink the seltzer, now!
20:48Time me.
20:54Way to go, Arnold!
20:57Now, let's rock the bus to create a giant gas bubble!
21:14It's working!
21:16It's working!
21:17It's working!
21:18It's working!
21:19Now what?
21:31Did I break the seltzer chugging record?
21:34I'll never break a record.
21:37I'll never win anything.
21:39I'll never even get to eat lunch.
21:41Did someone say lunch?
21:51Congratulations, Arnold!
21:54Huh?
21:54You just broke the record for being the best field trip ever!
21:59W-what?
22:00And giving me the ride of my dreams!
22:03You mean, I was the field trip?
22:07Yep.
22:09But where exactly did you go?
22:14You went inside?
22:19Miss Frizzle, no matter what, I'll never miss another field trip.
22:24Never, ever, ever, ever!
22:27Wonderful, Arnold!
22:30I'm starting right after the next one.
22:42Is this the magic school bus?
22:43Is this the magic school bus?
22:45Magic school bus?
22:46Magic school bus?
22:47What do you mean?
22:47Magic school bus?
22:48Magic school bus?
22:50Magic school bus?
22:51Magic school bus?
22:52I want the magic school bus!
22:54I want the magic school bus!
23:04Magic school bus?
23:06Just a minute, please.
23:08Hold on!
23:21Be right with you.
23:26Magic school, bus.
23:27Boy, for a show on science, there's sure a busload of mistakes.
23:31You think so?
23:32I mean, they just zip through the digestive system.
23:35Nobody's food goes through them that fast.
23:37You're right.
23:38It takes more than ten hours to digest,
23:40but when we pitched Digestion, the miniseries,
23:43the network didn't bite.
23:44And where did all the light come from?
23:46Except for in the mouth, Digestion takes place in complete darkness.
23:50Believe me, it would have been a lot cheaper
23:52to do the Magic School Bus radio show.
23:54And another thing.
23:56You only showed the small intestine absorbing stuff.
23:59Um, so we left out something?
24:02Something important.
24:03The stomach doesn't break down everything.
24:06The small intestine breaks things down, too.
24:09And all that stuff about the system not working in reverse.
24:12Sometimes it does, like when you throw up.
24:16Right again.
24:18But normally, it doesn't work that way.
24:21And talking about normal, he didn't complete the ride.
24:24Waste products that accumulate in the large intestine.
24:26I know, I know.
24:27They are eliminated out through the anus,
24:29the end of the digestive system.
24:31It's natural.
24:32It's normal.
24:33But did you really expect us to show that on daytime TV?
24:38Well, maybe not.
24:40And another thing.
24:41Wanda using gum to go bungee jumping in the large intestine?
24:44I mean, come on.
24:47Cute, huh?
24:48You could never use gum for bungee jumping.
24:50Not in a million years.
24:52I wish you guys would stick to the facts.
24:54What was that?
24:56Um, that?
24:57Oh, that was just the sound of Liz stretching the truth.
25:30Oh, that was just the sound of Liz stretching the truth.
25:32Such a fine thing to do.
25:34So strap your bones right to the seat.
25:37Come on in and don't be shy.
25:39Come on.
25:39Just to make your day complete.
25:41You might get baked into a pie on a magic school bus.
25:45Step inside.
25:46It's a wild ride.
25:48Come on.
25:49Right on the magic school bus.
25:51γγγΎγ.
25:51Right on.
25:52Come on.
25:52What?
25:52Well, we see you'll see you next time.
25:53Then when you're at home. You're
25:53the house. Let go.
25:53the house. I walk to
25:53maybe you're in Besides being alone. You're in
25:53Be asmith.
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