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Watch How I Met Your Mother () Do I Know You ( x265 Silence) Season 4 Episode 1 online in HD on Dailymotion (2005).
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00:02kids here's something i wish my dad had told me the longest pause you will ever experience in your
00:08life is the one that follows asking the question will you marry me your brain goes into overdrive
00:14imagining every possible response no oh god no
00:28i'm sorry ted i can't mark johnson the quarterback from your high school football team already asked
00:33me what's up turd it's ted but if you're lucky she may answer with the single greatest word in the
00:42english language yes
01:00stella and i spent that summer happily engaged marshall was still coping with unemployment
01:05what are you doing
01:09lily threw herself into her painting what are you doing
01:14barney was rehabilitating from his bus accident what are you doing
01:19and well marshall just kept coping with unemployment
01:25what are you doing
01:28and robin continued to uphold the high journalistic standards of metro news one
01:33is your favorite brand of dental floss poisoning your entire family tune in at 11 for the shocking
01:41tooth
01:45okay i officially hate my job i'm not a reporter i'm just someone who shows up at night and scares
01:51people i'm the boogeyman with the teleprompter
01:57boogeyman with the teleprompter that's hilarious great joke robin great job barney no offense to robin
02:04but that wasn't that funny are you kidding that's a great joke that's smart funny beautiful it's the whole package
02:10it's everything you're afraid to let yourself want
02:14in a joke
02:18boogeyman with a teleprompter
02:21classic
02:23okay
02:24what is so urgent that you called me and begged me to come over at 7 22 in the morning
02:30i could tell you knew something was up with me
02:32and you're right
02:33but i can't tell you what it is
02:35i should tell you but i can't
02:37i have to i never will i'm going to
02:38let's just drop it what's up with you
02:41why don't you just say it
02:45i think i'm in love with robin
02:48hey lily needs some gift ideas for stella's wedding shower
02:51does she like to cook
02:53um
02:54actually i don't know
02:55oh
02:56uh what's her favorite color
02:59don't know that either
03:01does she have any hobbies
03:02yes
03:03she's exactly the kind of person who would have hobbies
03:06and interests too
03:08i am one lucky son of a bitch
03:10dude you don't know anything about the woman you're marrying
03:14what you're crazy i know plenty
03:16what color are her eyes
03:19the color of the ocean after a storm
03:22which is
03:26beautiful
03:28i don't believe it
03:29i thought you called me over here to uncuff you from your sex swing again but
03:33you're in love that is so sweet
03:36it's not sweet it's it's like a disease i slept with robin one time and i caught feelings
03:43i caught feelings bad i used protection and everything
03:46oh barney you don't catch feelings you just have them and they're good
03:52they're terrible
03:54i can't eat i can't sleep
03:56she's all i think about i close my eyes i see robin
03:59i i hear a song it reminds me of robin
04:02morning
04:03i sleep with that chick i'm thinking about robin
04:07okay so i don't know every single detail about stella
04:10what's this really about do you not like her or something
04:12no ted i like stella a lot she's a mets fan
04:15really
04:16it's just that everything with you guys has moved so fast you've only known each other
04:19a few months don't you think maybe you should slow things down a little bit get to know
04:23each other better i'll have a whole lifetime to get to know her better right now i know
04:28the one thing that i have to that i love her you love her barney how can you be in
04:35love
04:35and still be sleeping with anything that moves
04:39i'm sorry i don't follow you that's like saying how can an ant carry 20 times its body weight but
04:46root beer floats are still delicious are the two even related really ow
04:50barney you're gonna have to stop screwing around if you want to be robin's boyfriend
04:55whoa whoa whoa
04:56haha boyfriend i don't want to be robin's boyfriend
05:00well what do you want then i don't know i just want to be with her all the time
05:06i want to hear about her day and tell her about mine i want to hold her hand and smell
05:13her hair but i don't want to be your stupid boyfriend
05:17well barney what you just described is a relationship between a boyfriend and a girlfriend and a
05:24pretty clingy one at that look lily are you gonna help me out with this or not
05:28i'm a kindergarten teacher i see a confused little kid in the corner trying to eat the lefty
05:34scissors i gotta help the poor little bastard but only if you stop sleeping around deal deal
05:42coming up next is your local ice cream man actually driving a roving meth lab on wheels
05:48stay tuned for the full scoop really
05:56uh-huh i know dudes think it's girly for a guy to cook but us ladies we find it mighty
06:04sexy
06:05really really you know uh my grandma taught me how oh yeah she did yeah i had a lot of
06:12time
06:12after school to watch her cook because i wasn't good at sports oh i'm on fire right now
06:23delicious what's in this pesto uh you know the usual basil garlic olive oil but can you guess my
06:29secret ingredients peanuts yes how did you know that okay let me think what else you know what
06:43sweetie i woke up so early and i had a really long day at work and then there was that
06:47whole thing
06:47where you tried to kill me oh please just go to sleep oh i clearly need to know more about
06:52you
06:52let's do first um first kiss dale harris second grade wait are you talking like peck on the cheek
06:59or a full-on passionate making out passionate making out okay yeah dale harris second grade
07:04uh first time you had sex dale harris second stop billy devito sophomore year of college prude
07:11molly mckenzie junior year of high school slut robin just needs to see this new side of you so
07:18just call her up just call her up she wasn't there i left a voicemail you left a voice but
07:32it wasn't
07:32male barney i don't get it you've called a million girls a million times yeah but those were just booty
07:38calls on a booty call you barely even have to talk around 9 p.m you say hey baby it's
07:44barney you busy
07:45tonight sweet see you in half an hour can't wait but the later it gets the fewer words you need
07:52barney busy sweet and by three in the morning
08:04sweet a question mark you got laid off a question mark
08:10oh hey it's no worse than your super obvious code words
08:16rhinoceros we have to go great now we need a new code word
08:22uh uh it's her it's robin what do i do what no no no no no robin great to hear
08:28from you
08:29to what do i owe the pleasure you called went and hung up what do you want help me
08:38just ask her something how are you feeling today fine something personal um
08:48at what age did you first get your period did you just ask me about my period no i did
08:54not
08:56look barney i'm at work right now just ask her out um robin i was wondering if
09:06nothing gotta go bye ha ha ha that was just a practical joke i'm not really in love with robin
09:14you should have seen the look on your face there's cameras right there and there and there ah what a
09:21legendary prank that we're never gonna speak of again
09:30gross
09:33uh first movie ever saw benji 1981. i watched it recently with lucy and i just thought
09:40oh that dog is so dead right now what about you uh my dad took me to an old drive
09:47in to
09:47see the original star wars you know i've actually never seen star wars she's never seen star wars
09:53ted the only people in the universe who haven't seen star wars are the characters in star wars and
09:58that's because they lived them ted that's because they lived the star wars you gotta calm down i told
10:03you i told you you didn't know this girl well enough what if you show it to her and she
10:07doesn't like it
10:07dude it's just a movie ted star wars is your all-time favorite movie and whether or not
10:12stella likes it is actually important it's like it's a test of how compatible you guys are marshall
10:18it's just a movie it's just a movie
10:26okay if stella doesn't like this movie i can't marry her no you can't
10:29you want to watch it again yes i do
10:39wait where are the boys i thought this was a group thing yeah i lied they're not coming and
10:43i'm about to leave why because they're not in love with robin and neither am i i mean she's great
10:51and sweet i'm not gonna pretend that i haven't noticed her body but well this is off topic good
10:56luck wait wait i can't do this she'll never take me seriously she thinks i'm some womanizing idiot hey
11:02we both know you're more than that okay just show robin the barney i met the other day
11:08you mean that insecure touchy-feely she-male who sounded alarmingly close to ted
11:13okay ted hit that for over a year wish me luck i just thought it'd be fun to watch a
11:21movie tonight
11:21and since you've never seen star wars i figured why not no big deal it's pretty good sounds like a
11:29plan
11:34hmm
11:35hey i'm just gonna grab a beer you want one um the movie's already started so yeah it's just
11:40some words flying through space i mean i'm not gonna read that anyway oh my god off to a bad
11:45start
11:46what are you doing down there i'm making sure my best friend is marrying the right woman that's
11:51what i'm doing dude what the hell are you doing hiding behind the couch you need to get a job
11:57i really do don't i yeah so robin tell me about your day and not just what happened how you
12:07felt
12:07about what happened what i'm not looking to problem solve i'm just looking to listen
12:15why are you acting like this like what you're being super nice it's freaking me out be gross be
12:24inappropriate be barney uh i'm being barney and i think tonight's going to be d wait for it lightful
12:35delightful right hey um so i went to the chiropractor yesterday that guy bent me over the table and
12:44pounded me for a good hour insurance going to cover that sometimes they don't that's it okay
12:56well um today i was at the dentist that guy drilled me all day long he drilled me hard
13:06he filled all of my cavities come on man well your teeth look fantastic who are you
13:22what nothing you were staring at me you look really beautiful tonight
13:31you don't look so bad yourself in this dirt yeah great scene great scene
13:39star wars fun fact number seven george lucas based the film structure on akira kurosawa's the
13:44hidden fortress uh he also owes a debt to joseph campbell's work with comparative mythology yeah ted
13:49i'm losing wood over here what's going on hi wait it's really important to you that i like this movie
13:58isn't it no well i'm not gonna like it with you staring at me the whole time
14:05go to your room and i will come get you when it's over go go
14:16should i leave
14:16what part what part what part
14:35what part what part what i mean
14:50seriously okay um there's a job opening at a new cable network that would be
14:58perfect for me completely legit world news interviews with people who matter
15:05uh but i decided i'm not gonna apply why not because i'm a joke i'm just a scary
15:11news lady from some stupid local news channel hey we both know you're more than that promise me
15:18you'll apply barney it's not as easy promise me you'll apply okay i promise
15:30okay she's up to the scene where luke leah hon and chewie escape from the death star's trash
15:34compactor great scene great scene okay we should have just heard
15:46oh but stella didn't make a peep i'm gonna take a look all right
15:59she's not even watching she's texting i'll tell her you still want to be friends i don't believe this
16:04i don't believe she knows this is important i mean she's blatantly
16:11stop watching me jackasses to taking chances to taking chances
16:20you know robin there's actually something i i do want to talk to you about last call of course it
16:25is
16:26one more for the road yeah why not hold that thought
16:33i will
16:42i loved it yes yes i am marrying a woman who is not only hot but loves star wars that's
16:50the dream yes
16:52what was that i was high-fiving 15 year old me through the space-time continuum we did it we
16:58did
16:58it you masturbating little bastard champagne for everybody
17:05it was so good you hated it didn't you so stupid wait first of all how do they understand that
17:11walk-in
17:11bear they hang around with all the time wookie yeah he goes
17:16and they're all like that's a good point bear let's try that okay he's a wookie and his kind
17:21is actually more intelligent than they appear
17:25look stella that is ted's favorite movie of all time he watches it when he's homesick with the flu
17:30he watches it on rainy sunday afternoons in the fall he he watches it on christmas eve
17:37ted watches star wars in sickness and in health in good times and in bad
17:43do you really think that you can pretend to like a movie that you actually hate for the rest of
17:47your life
17:53i do
17:56well then ted's a lucky guy
18:02baker
18:07hey so here's the deal april have you met barney hi barney uh hello april just finished her shift and
18:16she's looking to blow off some steam ah would you excuse us for one sec what are you doing well
18:24you
18:25were so nice to me tonight i wanted to return the favor wing woman style so as i was saying
18:30april
18:31barney is the yankees new second baseman and barney april asked if tomorrow you could hit a goal for
18:37her during the baseball match you can't make this stuff up so you two kids have fun
18:47so are you uh nervous about the game yeah i'm nervous for the other team because when i step up
18:53to that
18:54a place look april i'm not a new york yankee any other night i would probably try to convince you
19:02that
19:02i am but i'm not i'm just some guy who's in love with the girl that just left and she's
19:08never gonna feel
19:09the same way so i'm just gonna go and that was it i'm so sorry barney
19:19but you can't give up you know it may take some time but once robin really sees the new you
19:25barney
19:25um when my family gets to yankee stadium are they tickets under your name or mine
19:29my name and tell your nephews to bring their mitts they're gonna be in foul ball country
19:37okay well the robin stuff was completely true ow damn it barney i mean for the last time you can't
19:45you
19:46can't be in love with robin and still be sleeping with every bimbo on the planet you have to choose
19:52right now i choose bimbos what hey lily bimbos make me happy bimbos make me feel alive bimbos make
20:02me want to pretend to be a better man this whole thing with robin was just a fling but at
20:08the end of
20:08the day my heart belongs to bimbos no no this is just a defense mechanism because you're afraid of
20:15getting hurt you're just confused oh i'm not confused lily you know who is confused bimbos
20:23they're easily confused it's one of the thousand little things i love about them
20:28i love their vacant trusting stairs their sluggish unencumbered minds their unresolved
20:36daddy issues i love them lily and they love me bimbos have always been there for me through thick and
20:44thin mostly thin b-men don't do thick crust what up see ya barney oh
21:01it's
21:02it's
21:03it's
21:05it's
21:20Chimichunga.
21:21We have to go.
21:37We have to go.
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