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00:06We've had a lip-sync for the win, there's no mirror message to wipe off, and we're still here as
00:11top four.
00:12I mean, what a blessing.
00:14Crystal, are you happy?
00:15I am really happy.
00:16Don't tell your face that.
00:17Hey, don't move, I've had too much done.
00:20When Rue said vanity, you are safe, I was so shooketh.
00:25I'm not going to lie, I was like, what?
00:27Yeah.
00:28My heart, it was beating so hard in this tiny corset, I thought I was about to die.
00:33But do you know what, I was bumping that ground in a split as an Oompa Loompa.
00:38I didn't know you could still split after coming at the care home.
00:41Nana's had her pills and she's feeling all fruity, doing the dance.
00:45You might call me old, but I'm still a loosey-goosey.
00:47Oh, that's what we've heard, that's what your husband calls you as well.
00:50And I tell you, I need to find my plum later, because it is up here.
00:54Let's talk about badges, let's go, let's have a little top up.
00:57So you've got...
00:57I've got two badges, plus a sash, remember.
00:59I've got three, three badges.
01:02And no sash.
01:03Two, no sash.
01:04And this orange over here's got...
01:06One badge.
01:07So I guess that means I'm in the lead, right?
01:11Yeah.
01:12Oh, look at you.
01:14Badges don't matter at this present moment in time.
01:16It's about what you bring to the table here and now.
01:19Are you all sleeping on me still?
01:23Uh, calm it down, my love.
01:25I am going to have to get my marbles out to take you out.
01:27We are so close to the end now.
01:30It's anyone's game.
01:31The competition is so real.
01:33I want you to draw me like one of your French girls.
01:36Mr. Big Artiste is blushing.
01:37I do love you.
01:38There is no safety net.
01:40We're still here to fight.
01:42Get her out of here.
01:43I don't like this one.
01:45Get rid of her.
01:45Let's get this down to top three.
01:47One of these has got to go.
01:49Put your hands on me, Jack.
01:50Okay.
01:51Oh, no, not really.
01:51Oh, no, no, no.
01:52I'm going to get you.
01:55Top four.
01:56Top four.
01:56To the floor.
01:58Again.
01:59It's a new day in the workroom, and we're still the top four.
02:02But something is a little bit different.
02:04I've got another badge.
02:06Oh, yeah.
02:08Did you see that baddity?
02:08Three badges.
02:10Do you know what?
02:10Get the f*** out of my face with these three badges.
02:13I don't give a f*** about it.
02:15You've got one for the group challenge.
02:16I've got one for the group challenge.
02:17I mean, I'm still, you know, happy that I've got this one badge,
02:21and I'm still here, and I'm proving myself every week.
02:23I made it to top four because I am a fierce queen.
02:26I perform the house down.
02:28But I do have to stop and pinch myself sometimes
02:30because there are amazing queens that have gone home.
02:33Though I have to knock a b***h out, I mean,
02:35I've got to do what I've got to do to make it to top three.
02:38Period.
02:38Well, that's fair enough.
02:39I think I'm going to get to top three by winning challenges,
02:41not by being in the lip-sync, sweetheart.
02:43So you can get to the top three just by being the loudest.
02:45Oh, it's working so far, honey.
02:47One beat.
02:48I'm going to be in the top three because I'm talented.
02:51Ella Vidae is definitely my biggest competition for this crown.
02:54She has proved that she can do it all,
02:56but she's not Kitty Scott Claus.
02:58Crystal, how are you feeling, sweetheart?
03:00I'm feeling great.
03:01I think it's all f***ing catching up to me.
03:03Yeah, your b***h is back off.
03:04I'm not feeling the best today.
03:06However, I'm going to push through and deliver my best, as always.
03:10I'm going to take my vitamins and carry on.
03:12I'm not giving up now, no matter what comes at me.
03:15So, yeah.
03:16Well, I know it's a competition, but look after yourself.
03:18Yeah.
03:18Don't try too hard.
03:19Yeah.
03:20You're going on anyway, so it's fine.
03:21Yeah.
03:23Who is ready to make top three?
03:26Me!
03:27Me!
03:36Her majesty did already have hers.
03:40Come on, darling.
03:41Go on, sweetheart.
03:42That was mine, God.
03:44My queens.
03:45Remember, one man's sin is another man's drag name.
03:50The time has come for you to clean up your side of the street.
03:54And while you're at it, see what you can do about hosing down those early gates.
04:00Ah!
04:02What?
04:03I am confused as hell.
04:05Oh, I'm a sinner, baby!
04:08Oh, smell it!
04:09Hello, hello, hello!
04:11Yeah!
04:16Ladies, condragulations for making it to the semi-finals.
04:20We have that!
04:21Amazing.
04:22Whoever survives this challenge will make it through to next week's grand finale,
04:27where we'll be crowning a winner, baby!
04:30I'm ready.
04:31But first, you need to prove to us that you are truly deserving.
04:36For this week's Maxi Challenge, you'll be defending your life in a pearly gates comedy roast.
04:42Oh!
04:44Okay.
04:45Watch out, honey.
04:46To repent for your sins, you need to write a stand-up set where you roast yourself.
04:53Sounds heavenly, right?
04:55Mm-hmm.
04:56Wrong.
04:57You little devils will also need to roast the judges panel.
05:01Right.
05:02Okay.
05:02Oh, my God.
05:03Including me, Michelle, Alan, and our extra special guest judge, comedy genius, Cathy Burke.
05:11Oh, my God!
05:12Oh, my God!
05:13That's right.
05:14No one is out of bounds.
05:16Hashtag Drag Race UK.
05:18Racers, start your engines.
05:21And may the...
05:22Oh, wait a minute.
05:23I almost forgot.
05:25You'll be performing in front of an audience that consists of the eliminated queens of season
05:32three.
05:33Wow.
05:35No, we don't need them.
05:37Watch out.
05:37That's right.
05:38They are back, back, back again.
05:41So, feel free to also let them have it.
05:44Okay.
05:45Mm-hmm.
05:47Oh, no.
05:48I don't want to do this.
05:50We have to roast ourselves, the judges, and the dead weight of season three.
05:55Wish me luck.
05:57Hell of a day.
05:58Since you've won the most repeater badges, you get to choose the order in which the queens
06:04perform.
06:05Okey-dokey.
06:06Oh, shit.
06:06And on the runway, category is...
06:09Oh.
06:09My.
06:10Goddess.
06:12Ethereal.
06:12Mystical.
06:13Glamour.
06:14Oh, yes.
06:15That's going to be good.
06:16Racers, start your engines.
06:18And may the best drag queen win.
06:21Bye.
06:22Who's done comedy stand-up before?
06:25Have you?
06:25Has anyone?
06:26No.
06:26I've never done actual stand-ups before.
06:29But, like, in my gigs, I obviously host, and a lot of it is talking to the audience
06:33improvisation.
06:34So, like, stand-up has always been something that I'm like...
06:36Oh, I'd love to try it one day.
06:38And I guess today's the day.
06:39Yeah.
06:39Today's the day.
06:40I've not done any stand-up, and because I'm new to drag as well, like, most of my gigs
06:44were just literally turning up, singing, and going home.
06:46Yeah.
06:46So, this is going to be a challenge.
06:48I don't write jokes.
06:50I don't go knock-knock who's there, because I don't care who's behind the door.
06:53Do you know what I mean?
06:54Van?
06:54Never.
06:55I am a joke.
06:57I've only got one badge.
07:00Everyone's got my name in their mouth.
07:01I am a joke.
07:02Orange wigs.
07:03Orange outfit.
07:04Yeah, I'm going to turn that into the best advantage I could possibly do today.
07:07It's not going to be easy at all, because I don't like to roast people.
07:11The only thing I like to roast is chicken.
07:13Also, how hard are people going to go in?
07:18Who knows?
07:18Got to write it first.
07:19Well, do you know what?
07:20It's a comedy roast.
07:22We need to make Rue laugh.
07:23We need to make the eliminated queens laugh.
07:25Yeah.
07:26I say we go in.
07:27Yeah.
07:28Oh, it's all love after a roast.
07:30They're in on the joke.
07:31That's the whole point.
07:32Otherwise, it's just me.
07:33What about Rue?
07:34Do you feel scared of roasting Rue, anyone?
07:36I don't really, because I know Rue can take it and take the slack, so...
07:40Did you say Rue is slack?
07:41No, Rue can take the slack.
07:43Oh.
07:44It can take a bit of, a bit of a dig.
07:46Oh.
07:47So...
07:48I'm trying to like me.
07:49I'm trying to like me.
07:49I'm trying to be with that now.
07:51Wow.
07:52I'm going to do everything in my power to excel.
07:54I'm going to talk shite up on that stage and make Rue laugh.
07:58And then, let's see what happens.
08:01I've got the power, which is a bit, a bit scary.
08:03Oh, yeah.
08:04So what do you think you're going to do with this?
08:07How do you think you're going to play it?
08:08I'm going to be slightly tactical about this, I think.
08:10Okay.
08:11Yeah.
08:13Crystal, where would you want to go in the line-up?
08:15Part of me wants to go first to get it done with, but then I'm like, ooh!
08:19Where would you want to go?
08:20Either first or last.
08:22Right.
08:23Where would you want to go?
08:24Second or third.
08:25My tactics are to put the weakest person first, to then follow them, myself.
08:32And then put the person that I think will close the show well at the end.
08:36So it should go rubbish, good, rubbish, good.
08:42I'm going to go for Crystal first.
08:46Oh, okay.
08:47I'm going to go second.
08:48Then I think I'll go Vanity third.
08:52I'll finish with you.
08:53Gorgeous.
08:54I like that.
08:55I'm happy with that order.
08:56Yeah.
08:57It's going to be a challenge, but I'm off for it.
08:58I'll just touch myself.
09:00I love the day.
09:01I see what you're up to, my darling.
09:03I read the room and I see what you're doing.
09:06Very, very naughty.
09:07Naughty, naughty girl.
09:08I guess we'd better start writing.
09:10Yeah.
09:10Wiggle it away.
09:21Kitty, are you laughing at your own jokes?
09:24Sad cow.
09:26Other people find me funny, but I find myself the funniest out of anyone.
09:30I find myself hilarious.
09:32And I don't know if that's always the most endearing quality in a person.
09:35But it's very different finding yourself funny and writing something funny and then performing it and getting a laugh.
09:41Well, you know what they say about people who laugh at their own jokes?
09:44What?
09:44They fail.
09:46What?
09:48I don't know, sweetheart.
09:49I can't wait to hear a couple of yours.
09:51Crack out the funnies, Vanny.
09:52I'm trying.
09:53Okay.
09:54Try harder.
09:55Oh, Jesus.
09:59Did you find it easy to write or is it, like, really hard?
10:02You know, I'm finding it hard to roast any of the judges.
10:07Right.
10:09I'm a nice person.
10:11I'd rather celebrate you instead of tearing you down.
10:14I'd rather tear myself down before I tear you down.
10:16I'm just kind of going with, like, how I would talk, I think.
10:19Yeah.
10:20Because I'm better and I'm more improv-y.
10:22My kind of comedy is dad jokes.
10:25How do you invite an ant to your party?
10:29Would you like to come to my party?
10:37I think that's brilliant.
10:39Kitty, are you going to be roasting yourself as well?
10:42Paps a bloody loadly, sweetheart.
10:44Do you know what?
10:45There's a gold mine of material out there that's all untapped.
10:50This is, like, the biggest deal.
10:52It's a spot in the final here.
10:54I ain't pulling punches, hun.
10:56So get your ice packs ready because you're all about to get burned.
10:59Ooh.
11:00Meow.
11:02Kitty's got confidence, doesn't she?
11:04She thinks she's got this one in the bag.
11:07Mmm.
11:08Shall we start painting, ladies?
11:10I think we better.
11:11Oh, should we? Okay.
11:11Get this face on.
11:17Vanity, so, how are we feeling?
11:21Um, I'm a little bit nervous.
11:24Because it's all about, like, being confident enough to get what you want to portray across.
11:29Yeah.
11:29I mean, I think you're a really funny person.
11:31Naturally, yeah.
11:32What were you like as a kid?
11:32Were you confident or shy or...?
11:34I think I was the most confident kid ever.
11:36Really?
11:37I was the obnoxious, confident middle child.
11:40Oh, wow.
11:40Like, yeah, no one couldn't tell me nothing.
11:42I was the shit.
11:43Yeah.
11:43As a kid, I was always, like, the funny, random kid of the family.
11:49Like, I did play with dolls all the time.
11:51My mum didn't stop me.
11:52Me too, yeah.
11:53Did your dad ever tell you to man up?
11:54No, he didn't.
11:57But when I was doing my dance training, they were literally like,
12:00no, girly boys, you're all too girly.
12:02Mm-hmm.
12:03So, like, there's this real pressure in theatre and in acting to be this straight...
12:08Masculine.
12:09...masculine character.
12:10So you changed yourself to, you know, fit the mould.
12:12Exactly.
12:13You know, you're a man.
12:14You've got to do this.
12:15You've got to stand like this.
12:16You've got to look like this.
12:17I didn't get auditions because they were like,
12:18oh, you look too girly or whatever.
12:21Can you come back next week looking more manly?
12:22It's like, how do I do that when I'm 19 years old?
12:25You want me to grow a full beard that I don't have?
12:27So did you try and suppress your feminine side?
12:30Yeah, I would say I did.
12:31I'm not a very overtly camp person in real life.
12:34Yeah.
12:35And I think that's because I've kind of made myself that way, in a way.
12:38Ella is my chance to access that camp feminine side.
12:43I feel this extra confidence that I don't necessarily have in real life.
12:48Like, we couldn't be more different.
12:49And that is what I love.
12:50Have you ever experienced, like, toxic masculinity?
12:54Yes.
12:54You know, walking around.
12:55You know, I get called out for walking feminine.
12:57I've got feminine features.
12:58Yeah.
12:58I've got a fat old booty.
13:00And I don't look like the most masculine man ever.
13:02But I do feel the pressure of, like, being more masculine.
13:05I empathize with Ella a lot because I had to change myself and pretend like I wasn't gay and flamboyant.
13:13Thank God that my family, you know, hardcore Jamaican people, have accepted me, my marriage, my husband.
13:19And I think in my everyday-to-day life, I walk with my head held high.
13:24My parents have always just told me to never let anyone question who you are.
13:27And you don't have to do a specific thing to be masculine.
13:30You don't have to be a specific person to be feminine.
13:32Don't change yourself for anybody.
13:34You shouldn't have to.
13:34Never.
13:35And that's what I've learned.
13:36I am who I am, and you're not going to change me for anything.
13:40Embrace your place.
13:41Embrace yourself and show your pride.
13:42Right.
13:43As that great lyricist Ella the day says.
13:45I love you.
13:46I love you.
13:48I love you.
13:55You okay?
13:57I just look so stunning today.
13:59I've really outdone myself.
14:01Boom, baby.
14:03Boom!
14:06Welcome to the main stage of RuPaul's Drag Race UK.
14:09Michelle Visage.
14:11Michelle, are you spiritual?
14:13Oh, baby.
14:14Absolutely.
14:15I'm on my knees every night.
14:19And the super-spexy Alan Carr.
14:22Alan, have you ever been roasted?
14:25Does being spit-roasted count?
14:28Yes.
14:29Oh, yeah.
14:30I have.
14:30I have.
14:32And our extra-special guest judge, the queen of laughs, Cathy Burke.
14:38Hello, darling.
14:39Are you my nurse?
14:42Well, right now you're on RuPaul's Drag Race in a studio.
14:46Oh, very nice.
14:47Nice to get out.
14:49This week we challenged our queens to defend their lives in a pearly gates roast.
14:57Racers, start your engines, and may the best drag queen win.
15:03Tonight, from just outside the pearly gates of Drag Race Heaven, our semi-final queens are ready to defend their
15:12lives.
15:13First up, put your praying hands together for Crystal Versace.
15:23Hello.
15:28How is everyone tonight?
15:31Yeah?
15:32Okay.
15:33Oh, good.
15:33Hi.
15:34Now, if I'm honest, I was scared to come up here tonight.
15:37Not because it was a comedy roast, but because I had to see Charity Case again.
15:40And she scares the living shit out of me.
15:42She is literally a horror movie on legs.
15:45And don't even get me started when she's actually in drag.
15:49I'll take her.
15:50Now, I am here to confess my sins.
15:54However, I was only born last week, so this shouldn't take too long.
15:58Well, if you get Michelle up here, she'll be here all night.
16:00You wouldn't hear the last of it.
16:01Yeah, yeah.
16:03I'm 19.
16:04I know.
16:05Roo is old enough, you might be surprised, to be my great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great,
16:15great, great grandmother.
16:22And Kathy Burke.
16:23Yes.
16:23I'm very sorry, but I'm not quite old enough to just know who you are right now.
16:28Give myself a few more years.
16:29Yes, I'm sorry.
16:30Oh my God.
16:32I'm going to let you in on one of my biggest sins.
16:35The fact that I am a virgin.
16:39I am.
16:40I've never had sex.
16:43I've just put all my work and efforts into drag and never had time for a shag.
16:48So that's just how it is.
16:50Now, I wanted to raise that because I wanted to explain to Michelle what a virgin was.
16:54I thought I'd bring a little bit of awareness.
16:56Okay.
16:57Great.
16:58So basically what a virgin is, my love, is someone that has never had sex.
17:02Now, I'll say that a little bit slowly so you can hear what I'm saying.
17:05That's someone that's never had sex.
17:09Oh.
17:10Okay.
17:11Uh-huh.
17:11Just so you know.
17:12Great, thanks.
17:18Okay.
17:21And now to the gorgeous, yet cracking, Veronica Green.
17:26Oh, I miss you, darling.
17:27It was nice to have Grandma there while I had her.
17:30And you were the only one that made Rue look young.
17:34For a second.
17:36The only thing getting old is these jokes.
17:40I tried my best.
17:45Help.
17:46Now, Rue has complimented me on being gorgeous and young and good at what I do.
17:52Not anymore!
18:01Well, anyway, what I was going to say is that's everything what Elle of a Day is not.
18:06I'm talking about Miss Elle of a Day.
18:09Get that old cow up here.
18:10I'm done.
18:13I'm out.
18:14Fuck that.
18:15I do not think I'm destined for a Korean stand-up.
18:18No, ma'am.
18:19I've done it once and that's enough for me.
18:21Never again.
18:24Hello, he's, she's, they's and Michelle Visage.
18:28How you doing?
18:30I'm Elle of a Day.
18:32Now, Elle of a Day is one of those names that just keeps on giving.
18:36You know, it's memorable.
18:37And then I've got them thinking, who else has got a memorable and catchy name?
18:41Anus bus.
18:46Hang on a sec, I've got this.
18:48Anabuni.
18:50Akuna.
18:50Akuna Matadene.
18:53On your bus, which is what you wear in week one.
18:56I just truly hope that you embraced and really enjoyed the experience of being at home for eight weeks.
19:05Veronica Green, hello dear.
19:07I thought it was so lovely to have you here on season three.
19:11You are truly the definition of a triple threat to society.
19:17But listen, that is not a forehead.
19:21That is her hairline literally trying to run away from that face.
19:27Talking of faces, Alan Carr.
19:29Oh my God, it is so nice to see you up here every two weeks.
19:33It reminds me of childhood seeing my dad.
19:34But your face is beaming from ear to weir.
19:38And your teeth are so gappy, it's like your tongue is in prison.
19:42Set that tongue free.
19:45Victoria Scone, or is it Scone?
19:47The debate continues.
19:50But lucky for me, she was Scone by week three.
19:53So I didn't have to bother working it out.
19:55But listen, babe, if you ever need any help, just knee slide into my DMs, alright?
20:01LAUGHTER
20:03Kitty Scott Clause.
20:05She has been doing drag for donkey's years.
20:08She has got the experience.
20:10She has got the contacts.
20:12She has got gout.
20:14Oh no, sorry, silly me, I meant clout.
20:17She has got the clout within the drag community.
20:19It's gorgeous to see.
20:20Now, RuPaul, you said the other week,
20:22stop being predictable.
20:24And then, Kitty wins an award for being fugly.
20:27That is predictable.
20:30I'm still younger than you, darling.
20:32Shut up, only by three years, dear.
20:34I might be 32, but I taste 18, let me tell you.
20:38And then we've got Crystal Versace.
20:41She's like a cute little scared chihuahua that I just want to pick up,
20:45put in a bag and then throw off a cliff.
20:47LAUGHTER
20:50Last week, she played a robotic fashion girl.
20:53I mean, talk about typecasts.
20:55But listen...
20:57If I'm...
21:02If I'm ever in need of a brain transplant,
21:04I'm picking yours because it has not been used yet.
21:10Well, that's all I've got, I think.
21:12If you enjoyed that, I have been Ella Vidae.
21:14If you didn't, I have been Vanity Milan's greasy-ass face.
21:18Thank you very much.
21:22Ella has pulled it out the bag yet again.
21:25Someone pass me my rifle.
21:27And talking of greasy-ass faces,
21:30up next is Vanity Milan.
21:32Thank you very much.
21:38Hi, guys. How are we?
21:40Great.
21:41Not bad.
21:41I'm Vanity Milan, if you don't know,
21:43and I hit the ground running.
21:45Or should I say, I kicked three of you bitches out.
21:47How are you doing?
21:48I was so excited about being on Drag Race Season 3.
21:52And after all of you entered the room,
21:54I thought to myself,
21:56Fuck.
21:57I'm the only black queen here.
21:59And you know what happens in scary movies
22:01with the token black person, right?
22:03They always go first.
22:06But, thank God it wasn't me,
22:07and it was Anubis.
22:08Just one question.
22:09Is Anubis running?
22:11Okay.
22:13So, as you know,
22:14my husband makes 80% of my costumes,
22:18and there's a slight language barrier there,
22:21because he only speaks Estonian.
22:22And the only word I know in Estonian is orange.
22:26And most of my costumes on the main stage have been orange.
22:29But you know what they say,
22:30orange is the new black,
22:32black don't crack,
22:33and I'm at peace with that.
22:35Can I get an amen?
22:36Amen.
22:37Look, I've learned so many things in this competition.
22:40I've learned that I'm not the smartest person in the world,
22:42because I found out it was a roast,
22:44and I thought,
22:45it's a cooking challenge.
22:47And I'm going to do great,
22:48because all I'm going to be cooking is dirty rice.
22:51However,
22:51I looked at these three girls,
22:53and they look like they boil chicken,
22:55and only use salt and pepper.
22:57Look at them sitting there looking like the white Supremes.
23:02Do you know what this top four reminds me of?
23:05Destiny's Child.
23:06And I'm the Beyonce.
23:07Okay.
23:08Ella,
23:10someone can send your luggage.
23:13No, didn't get the joke.
23:14That's fine.
23:15It's fine.
23:16I'm here all week.
23:18Not for long, sweetheart.
23:24Oh, you bitches trying to come for me.
23:26Sitting there looking like the...
23:28some green ass bitch.
23:30Your dress don't even fit.
23:31You sitting there with wires wrapped around your neck,
23:32and your titties hanging out.
23:33Jesus, who do you think you are, girl?
23:34Don't play with me.
23:35Okay.
23:38Oh, Vality.
23:43Right.
23:43I've got a question for everyone in the audience.
23:46Have you ever pissed on yourself?
23:47Yes.
23:48I've got a confession.
23:49Jesus, I have sinned.
23:51I have peed on myself once.
23:52And do you know what peeing on yourself is like?
23:55Being in love.
23:57Everyone can see it.
23:59But only you can feel the warmth.
24:05That was the most shittiest joke I've ever come up with.
24:08Are you sure?
24:10You know what?
24:11Don't get feisty down there, fellas.
24:12Alright?
24:13I'm Vanity Milan.
24:16That wasn't easy for me.
24:18But this one should be very easy.
24:20Kitty's got claws.
24:22Jesus Christ.
24:25Dirty rice!
24:26Dirty rice?
24:28If I'm gonna leave, I'm gonna leave on the dirty rice.
24:31Has Vanity found her funny bones?
24:36The beat, I don't know.
24:37The frog kiss.
24:40Now, forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
24:42Spectacles, testicles, wallet and watch, thank you!
24:45Thank you!
24:48Now, I would like to start by talking about something very near and dear to my heart.
24:55me. Now, I'd like you to take you back to a 14-year-old kitty. Okay, take our minds back.
25:02I'm going to take this out. Right, when I was 14, I went on a family holiday and I got
25:07mistaken for
25:07being the mum. And the worst part of that is that I must have looked so haggard and old that
25:14I looked
25:15old enough to have six kids, one of them being my own mother. How I wasn't bullied is beyond me
25:22because trust and believe, I want to go back and bully myself. Thank God for Harley Street.
25:29That's all I'm going to say, sweetheart. Now, I am known for being the queen of a thousand
25:34impressions, just like Crystal is known for being the queen of a thousand faces. Okay,
25:40ooh, not so good. Rue said that Crystal was born to do drag. And Rue, can I tell you what
25:46Crystal was not born to do? What? She wasn't born to do an acting challenge, a snatch game,
25:50a sewing machine, line learning or choreography. The list does go on, my love. Oh, and comedy
25:58apparently, thank you. Crystal describes her drag as sex on legs. But to quote my favourite
26:09film Clueless, she's just a virgin who can't drive. Vanity Milan is so lucky her husband makes
26:17all her looks for her. Too bad it couldn't make you win a challenge by yourself, my love.
26:21Ooh. Okay.
26:23Charitza is named after a spicy cured sausage. It doesn't mean you have to smell like one
26:28too, sweetheart. Just a bit of deodorant every now and again. That's all you need. Charity
26:34case. Say no more.
26:39Okay. Scarlet Harlot. Your wigs are flatter than River's performance at snatch game.
26:45Oh, shut up. Oh, shut up. Oh, fuck off. Alan, I love your show, chatty man. It's just a
26:53shame you chat so much shite on this panel. Kathy Burke. Hello, darling. The poor man's
27:01Dawn French. Oh, you can't call Kathy Burke that. That's Kathy Burke. It is such an honour.
27:10I grew up watching Gimme, Gimme, Gimme and Absolutely Fabulous is my favourite show. I just
27:15wish Jennifer Saunders was available tonight. Do you know what I love about Rue? I love your
27:22British accent. It's about as convincing as Michelle's Vogue routine on Strictly. No, Michelle,
27:29Michelle, I loved it. I loved it, Michelle. You were robbed. It's just a shame the British
27:33public didn't think so. No, they didn't. I've been Kitty Scott Clause. Thank you very
27:39much. Yay! Kitty's roast was just very her. Absolutely amazing.
27:49Can you feel the love? Category is Oh My Goddess. First up, Krista Versace.
27:57The Golden Child. Mmm. I am serving you, ethereal O.M. Goddess. She is covered in gold, crushed
28:06velvet, dripping in chains. You can't touch this. Gold. Always believe in your hole.
28:15I am floating down this runway. I am catching every light. She is your sun. She is your god. She
28:21is your everything. Worship me. I fancy a crunchy. Beautiful.
28:31Ella Vidae. She's living in an ethereal world because she's an ethereal girl. I am the Zodiac
28:40Goddess, dripping in stars, jewels and the constellation of the Virgo. Wanna see my Big Dipper? Look, it's
28:49Orion's tucking belt. This is a new look for me. I'm wearing a human wig for the first time
28:56ever. I have got 40 inches of blue ombre hair. And I'm swish, swish, swish, fishing down that
29:03runway. Is that your anus at the back? Up next, Vanity Milan. She only popped in to say
29:13halo. I am dripping in gold. I am giving you Cleopatra, ethereal realness. Serving you,
29:22queen of the damned, honey. She's serving deity rice. I'm feeling like I am on cloud nine.
29:31I am the new drag goddess. She's getting right on my nefertitties. Up next, Kitty's got claws.
29:42Her, Killies.
29:46I am serving you, Greek goddess realness. I feel ethereal. I am wearing my crown made of hair.
29:54My hair is flowing and curls down my back. Aphrodite, ooh. I don't know. It's all Greek to me.
30:03The judges are worshipping me. And as they should, I am a goddess.
30:09No Apollo cheese for this look.
30:17Welcome, goddesses. It's time for the judges' critiques.
30:22Let's start with Crystal Versace.
30:26So I think in this challenge, you started out pretty strong. But I think that you limited
30:30yourself by only telling age jokes and slag jokes.
30:35That's someone that's never had done.
30:39There was so much more you could have explored, but charming nonetheless.
30:44Obviously, you were up first, so I felt really nervous for you. But you have such likeability.
30:49So I, in a way, I forgave you for slagging off national treasure, Kathy Burke.
30:55Listen, sweetheart. It's very hard to tell somebody straight to their face that they're a fat old twat.
31:01You know? But you did it with such ease.
31:04So I applaud you.
31:06Oh, thank you.
31:09You somehow have the energy that allows the audience to have fun with you, which is half
31:13the battle right there. If you were to do this again, like right now, what would be the
31:19things you would make sure of?
31:20I could have came out with some jokes that maybe would have come in handy.
31:26Tonight on the runway, what kind of toga effect? The headpiece? Breathtaking.
31:31Do you know what I loved? Your performance as you came out. I was taken to some Inca temple
31:36where you were like this goddess. I just couldn't keep my eyes off you. It's pretty incredible.
31:43So stunning. My goodness. In fact, all of you are. It looks like some fabulous girl group.
31:49Amazing. All right. Thank you, Crystal.
31:52Thank you so much, Bert.
31:54Up next, hell of a day.
31:56You started out strong from the beginning and it was single, it was double, it was triple
32:01home run. You smashed it.
32:03Oh, thank you.
32:03I felt like a mother. I was so proud of everything that you did.
32:07Half of stand-up comedy is hiding your nerves and that's what you did. You left the podium
32:12and you left your notes. You delivered a sharp, biting, one-liners, scattergun, boom, boom,
32:17boom. You took everyone down.
32:19On your bus, which is what you wear in week one.
32:21And that's what a roast is.
32:24You gave us an hell of a good time. It was fabulous. So sharp. So I was really impressed.
32:32You know, something in your body language said, oh, we can relax. She's got this and
32:37we're free to laugh.
32:39Tonight on the runway, I thought this was beautiful, but because this is so grand, I wanted the hair
32:43to be more grand. But the color is beautiful and I like the beautiful ombre with what you're
32:47wearing. I just think you look stunning tonight.
32:50When you come out with the blue rinse, it was sort of a bit, that's a bit old lady for
32:54you, really. But listen, babe, you've got a body to die for and it's fantastic.
33:00What a hell of a day, hell of a night, hell of a everything. This is just the time to
33:05pull
33:05out something like what you've done. All right. Well, thank you, hell of a day.
33:09Thank you very much.
33:10Up next, Vanity Milan. Ooh, la, la, la, la, la, la. So when you came out for your roast
33:18routine, I just want to take a moment to tell you how beautiful you looked. The White Supremes
33:23line made me laugh out loud. That was actually really funny. I think where you went wrong
33:30was that when the audience wasn't with you or when they were heckling you, you had the
33:34feist and the fire. You were ready. You were like, oh yeah? And I stopped. And right,
33:38then it went nowhere, Vanity. Sitting there looking like some green-ass bitch.
33:43There was a lot to read in that audience. And you took the safe route. And in a roast,
33:49that's never, ever the smart thing to do.
33:52I loved it when you were being yourself. I loved all the dirty rice stuff. I just think
33:57you just needed a bit more confidence.
33:59You had some funny things in there. And you actually are funny. Being able to tap into
34:04that is what your next step with this is.
34:07This look is absolutely beautiful. When you came out, it was like, look at her. She's
34:11living her fantasy. And I'm really proud of how much you've pushed yourself.
34:16This is just true goddess. You almost look like a religious icon almost. I think this is
34:23a remarkable piece of work. I mean, you can't buy that, really.
34:27You can marry it, though. You can marry. You can marry. I'd have to pay for the marriage,
34:33but, you know. Did he Estonia those gloves?
34:36Oh, he so did. Shut up, you.
34:39Your costumes have been really gorgeous, really beautiful. And what a heavenly body.
34:44Thank you so much. All right. Thank you.
34:47Thank you so much.
34:48Up next, someone who is very comfortable behind a microphone. Kitty, Scott, Claus.
34:55Well, Kitty, I bowed to a superior comedy queen.
34:59Fuck off.
34:59I thought you were witty, sharp. So I loved it. I love being a pound shop, Dawn French.
35:06It's got me where I am today.
35:09And I agree with you 100%.
35:11Thank you so much.
35:12Well done.
35:13Thank you, Cathy. That means the world.
35:15Excuse me while I say some more shit on the panel.
35:20Absolutely loved your roast. And you did that classic stand-up comedy thing, luring us into a false sense of
35:25security.
35:26And then you attacked us all.
35:28Charissa is named after a spicy cured sausage. It doesn't mean you have to smell like one too, sweetheart.
35:34It was joke after joke after joke. You did, however, look down a lot.
35:39I would have loved you to have put the notes down and come away from the podium a bit like
35:43Ella did.
35:44Because then, imagine how funny that would have been.
35:47It's true. Had you put the cards down and felt the energy in the room a little bit more, it
35:52would have actually put us more at ease.
35:54You know? Which of the other girls did you laugh the most at?
35:57Ella's, definitely.
35:57Oh, with Ella. At Crystal.
36:03Just missed a little bit.
36:06Tonight on the runway, this is fun. It's you. It's almost like an opera diva meets Hercules.
36:13That's what I was going for.
36:14Yeah, I'm sure it was.
36:15It's the brief and it's Kitty.
36:17Love this look. Classic Greek. You do pick things that really suit your body.
36:23The tits.
36:23The tits, yeah. And I love your hair.
36:26And, uh, yeah. I think you've had a really good night.
36:29Thank you, Alan.
36:31Thank you, ladies.
36:32While you untuck in the workroom, the judges and I will deliberate.
36:37You may leave the stage.
36:40Come on, girls.
36:42Oh, I think we deserve a cheers for that.
36:44Here we go.
36:45Cheers, girls.
36:46Cheers.
36:47Cheers.
36:47Amazing.
36:48Cheers.
36:48Cheers.
36:49I feel amazing. I just had the most amazing critiques.
36:53Kathy Burke said that I was a comedy queen.
36:55Someone pinched me.
36:57How was that all for you?
36:59It was great.
37:00I'm glad I actually got through it.
37:01Nerves and all.
37:03I roasted myself more than I roasted anybody else on that main stage.
37:06And I didn't even go for the judges.
37:08They've been telling me how beautiful I look, the growth.
37:11And I didn't want to throw it back all in their faces.
37:13I'm, like, quite impressed with myself and quite proud of myself.
37:17The Rose Challenge was something that I was dreading most.
37:21And I pushed through it and I delivered something.
37:24I knew in my heart, like, go first. Do it.
37:26Just do it.
37:26And thankfully you made me do it.
37:29Yeah.
37:30How was it for you, babe?
37:31It's always so interesting when they say that you look really comfortable and really safe.
37:35Because inside my little head, my head's going, oh, you know, all these thoughts at once.
37:39The fact I've never done comedy before and they just felt like it was really strong performance with so many
37:45gags.
37:45Like, that just means so much to me.
37:47I feel really chuffed.
37:48Yeah, obviously my critiques on this look, they weren't, they didn't really like my blue wig, but that's fine.
37:54Ella, you walk in the runway as a blue rinsed nana complaining we call you old and then the judges
37:58bloody go and call you old.
37:59Well, listen, I've never seen a granny with a blue head.
38:02No.
38:03Mrs. Slocum.
38:04Must be a Birmingham thing.
38:05No, I swear.
38:06My nan had a blue wig.
38:08I love that.
38:10Oh, what?
38:12Girl.
38:12Her majesty did it already in her head, hers.
38:15What is this?
38:16What is going on now?
38:17Fish, not this.
38:19Oh my God, the siren.
38:20Triggering what is going on.
38:22No, I'm not ready for this now.
38:23What is it?
38:24No.
38:25Hey, Ella, it's Marco.
38:27And Wally.
38:28Oh my God.
38:28We miss you so much.
38:30Here at home, it's not the same without you.
38:33It's very quiet.
38:34It's just me and my dog and his stinky fart.
38:37That's okay because you stay where you are.
38:41You deserve this.
38:42You work so hard.
38:44So get that crown home.
38:46Thank you very much.
38:48And I will see you soon.
38:50Bye for now.
38:51Bye.
38:52Oh, I love you.
38:53That's so sweet.
38:54That is so sweet.
38:55Oh my God, isn't he handsome?
38:57Oh, I've missed him so much.
38:59Like, not being able to call him and tell him how I'm doing and have a hug.
39:04And like, in the times where I've just really struggled, I've not been able to, you know, be able to
39:09be like, oh.
39:11Yeah, that comfort.
39:11Yeah, just, that's like quite overwhelming.
39:15I'm just loving seeing him.
39:17Oh, it honestly fills my heart with so much joy to see him and my miserable looking dog.
39:25Oh my God.
39:25Oh my God.
39:26Hi, Kitty.
39:26Hi, Kitty.
39:27We're so proud of everything you've been doing.
39:30You're so creative, funny, caring.
39:34And you just have the strength to show people who you truly are.
39:37Enjoy the experience.
39:38Have a great time.
39:40We love you loads.
39:41We're very proud of you.
39:42We all miss you.
39:43And we're looking forward to seeing you soon.
39:46Bye.
39:46Bye, Kitty.
39:47Bye, love you.
39:48Oh my God, I don't know who they are.
39:52That's my mum and my dad.
39:53Oh my God.
39:54My dogs.
39:55I have such a good relationship with my parents.
39:58I literally speak to them all the time.
40:00They can't shake me off for love nor money.
40:03Literally, I talk to my mum like constantly.
40:05Like, I've really missed them.
40:06Yeah.
40:07So, thank you.
40:08Oh my God.
40:09Love you.
40:10See you soon.
40:13Hiya.
40:14We really miss you.
40:15And we hope you're doing really well.
40:18We knew you were destined to be a drag queen from a really young age when you was dressing
40:22up in my high heels and my handbags and knew you was going to be on RuPaul's Drag Race
40:27because you always said you would.
40:29And I know you're in the place that you want to be.
40:31I know you're giving it your best shot.
40:33Love you loads.
40:34I'm missing you.
40:35We love you.
40:35Love you loads.
40:36Bye.
40:37Bye.
40:39So beautiful.
40:40You look so much like your sister.
40:41You do.
40:42And your brother.
40:43Oh my God.
40:43Oh, that's crazy.
40:45I miss them so much because it's taken a long time for my dad to understand my drag.
40:51It's such a lovely thing that this experience has made them understand what I am and what
40:57I want to do in my life and how much it means to me.
40:59It's just so overwhelming, all this.
41:01Like, amazing.
41:03Hi, Vanity.
41:05I miss you so much, but verse can't describe how proud I am.
41:09I can't wait to see you and hug you and kiss you and hold you.
41:13But until then, I hope you're having the best time of your life and enjoying every second
41:18of it.
41:18As I told you before you left, you were born to be a star.
41:21So now, snatch that crown.
41:24You can do this.
41:25I love you.
41:29Oh, baby.
41:32Oh my God, that was so gorgeous.
41:36That is my ride or die.
41:38Like, just to see him now is so beautiful.
41:41Oh my God, I miss that bitch so much.
41:43I feel like that's just going to get us to the end now.
41:45I think seeing my husband is definitely going to give me the fight.
41:49It is so good to see my husband and to hear his sweet Estonian voice reminding me why I'm
41:55here.
41:55If I'm fucking lip syncing now, bitch, oh, I'm going to give a shit if I feel like crap.
42:00I'm going in.
42:01I know this time I'm going to be in the bottom and I'm going to fucking put on a performance.
42:04I am not going home just yet.
42:06I'm doing it for my family and the ones that love me.
42:09So.
42:10It's the way it should be.
42:10That's it.
42:11Whatever happens now, we're doing this for our families, but we are a family.
42:15Now we are, we are a little family now.
42:18It's so nice to have a group of drag queen friends as well.
42:23I've never had that before in my whole life.
42:24Whatever happens tonight.
42:25Just know that I fucking love you.
42:28Yeah.
42:28I love you girls.
42:29And we've made it this far.
42:31We have.
42:32Hooray.
42:33Hooray.
42:33Hooray.
42:34Hooray.
42:34Hooray.
42:35All right.
42:35Now, just between us girlfriends, what do you think?
42:40Let's start with Crystal Versace.
42:42Roasters are roasters and she is not a roaster.
42:45But she was able to make fun of herself during it.
42:48I am a virgin.
42:49If you are going to go there and open your soul, you better have a really good punchline.
42:54And she didn't have that.
42:55And then on the runway, is it the same girl?
42:57Full of confidence.
42:58That was when I felt I saw who she really was.
43:02Now, Kathy, you remember when you, when you realize, oh, I get why they hire Kathy Burke.
43:06Well, we're going back to the last century now, Ro.
43:10And I mean, I don't know what I'm doing here today.
43:16Hell of a day.
43:17Wow.
43:17From the minute Ella came out.
43:19Hello, he's, she's, they's, and Michelle Versace.
43:23I thought she was brilliant.
43:25It was ping, bang, boom.
43:27You mean bing, bang, bong.
43:28It was bing, bang, bong.
43:30I stopped taking notes.
43:31That's how brilliant she was.
43:33Well, I would pay to see her do stand-up because I thought she was so funny.
43:36It wasn't just, you're a slag, you smell.
43:38It was, you know what I mean?
43:40It was actually, oh, you thought about this.
43:43She felt very professional to me.
43:45I sort of forgot that she was part of the competition.
43:47I thought she was glorious.
43:49It said special something.
43:51And I'm sure the other girls will take note from here on.
43:54I thought she looked so stunning tonight.
43:56Had she put a headpiece on or done an updo?
43:59She could have elevated it.
44:00She certainly could have.
44:02Elevation.
44:03Vanity to Milan.
44:04So Vanity looked gorgeous in the roast.
44:06She just played it way too safe.
44:08When she got heckled and she grabbed that mic and she had fire in her belly, I was like, yes.
44:12Jesus, who do you think you are, girl?
44:13Don't play with me.
44:14With that kind of energy, she could be comparing a late show into some bar that starts at 1 a
44:19.m.
44:19I just wish she hadn't held back.
44:21We've all had that, where you know you've got to kill a line, but it could actually kill somebody.
44:26You know, that it would make them just curl up and die, you know.
44:30Had she written those mean jokes out, then she would have something.
44:34Loved a runway look and I loved the halo.
44:37It just lifted the whole outfit.
44:38Ella should commission Vanity's husband to do her some headdresses, actually.
44:44This was elevated for Vanity.
44:46She looked great.
44:46All right, let's move on to Kitty Scott Claus.
44:48Oh, Kitty was just great.
44:49She just throws everything at it and it's just infectious.
44:53Just to shame you chat so much shite on this panel.
44:55Even if she's slagging you off to your face.
44:59She was just kind of riffing, it felt like, but she kept it moving.
45:02She was good with the audience.
45:03I feel she was a bit in awe of me being here.
45:07And I think if it had been someone else like Jennifer Saunders, she'd have flown.
45:11She's a proper star in the making, actually.
45:15So much fun.
45:16She is a star.
45:17Her runway look, loved the pink and gold and the hair up like that.
45:21Not only was it fun and camp, it was also pretty.
45:24I thought it was a very strong night for our Kitty Scott Claus.
45:27Silence.
45:28I've made my decision.
45:29Bring back my girls.
45:33Welcome back, ladies.
45:35I've made some decisions.
45:44You're the winner of this week's challenge and the recipient of a coveted Rue Peter badge.
45:52Yes!
45:55Thank you so much.
45:57And yes, I am a shady bitch.
46:00More badges?
46:02Yes!
46:04Yes!
46:06And most importantly, you've earned your wings to compete in next week's grand finale.
46:12Yes!
46:13You may step to the back of the stage.
46:26Kitty Scott Claus, you are safe.
46:30Thank you so much.
46:32And you've also earned your wings to move on to next week's grand finale.
46:37Oh, thank you so much!
46:39You may step to the back of the stage.
46:50Crystal Versace.
46:53Vanity Milan.
46:55I'm sorry, my dears, but you are up for elimination.
47:00This is my chance to make it to the top three.
47:03I don't care if I come off this stage dead.
47:05I am not going down without a fight.
47:07Two queens stand before me.
47:13Ladies, this is your last chance.
47:16So impress me and save yourself.
47:20From elimination!
47:23The time has come for you to live sync.
47:28For your life!
47:33I don't want to go home.
47:34I need to make it to that final.
47:36And I'm definitely going to fight.
47:38Good luck.
47:39And don't.
47:41Fuck it up.
47:45Come on, girls.
47:46Come on, girls!
47:47Pocket full of honey and I'm ready to go.
47:51No, I ain't got no money, but I'm letting you know
47:54That I'ma love you like a fool
47:56Breathe you in till I hallucinate
48:00Mm-hmm
48:01No, I couldn't live without your touch
48:05No, I couldn't live without I have too much
48:08I'll with you in forever
48:11Never hurts me
48:19I hallucinate when you call my name
48:23Got stars in my eyes
48:26And they don't say when you call my way
48:30Got stars in my
48:31Yes!
48:34There it goes!
48:37Put you in my hall of fame
48:39Middle of the wall
48:40Yeah, you're my one
48:41My favorite
48:42My right or die
48:43Yeah, I'ma love you like a fool
48:45Breathe you in till I hallucinate
48:50Mm-hmm
48:51Wanna be right where you are
48:53Let's go dancing in the dark
48:55Don't wait, you can push aside
48:57Lose control
48:58Kill me slowly with your kiss
49:01Wrap me around your fingertips
49:02Down, I need another hit
49:04Make me lose my mind
49:06Hoooo
49:09Hallucinate when you call my name
49:12Got stars in my eyes
49:15And they don't say
49:17When you call my way
49:19I'm losing my
49:21No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no
49:24I'm losing my
49:25No, no, no, no, no, no, no
49:27I
49:29Can do something
49:31When you call my name
49:34Got stars in my
49:35I love you so much
49:48Oh, wow. Ladies, I've made my decision.
49:58Crystal Versace, Shantae, you stay.
50:01Oh, my gosh. Thank you so much.
50:06You may join the other girls.
50:08Thank you, everyone. Thank you so much.
50:10Come here. You're a fucking star.
50:13I love you so much.
50:14No.
50:16I'm gonna miss you.
50:24Vanity Milan, as you go forth to conquer the world, leave no Estonia unturned.
50:34Now, sashay away.
50:37Thank you so much for this opportunity.
50:39I couldn't have asked for a better turnout.
50:41I made it to top four.
50:43And you've got three amazing girls standing right behind me.
50:46Thank you so much.
50:50Love you, Vanity!
50:52Love you.
50:54I have one thing to say.
50:56What's on the menu?
50:58Dirty rice!
51:02Period.
51:06I am so happy.
51:07I'm a top four queen.
51:09I didn't even think I was gonna make it past week one.
51:11I'm just so humble and so proud of myself.
51:13I am a fiercer queen than when I first came into this competition.
51:18And also, I am no longer busted and greasy.
51:27Condragulations to my top three queens.
51:29Now, I want to hear from you, the viewers.
51:32Who do you think deserves to be the UK's next Drag Race superstar?
51:36Are you team Ella Vidae?
51:40Are you team Kitty Scott Claus?
51:43Or are you team Crystal Versace?
51:46Let your voice be heard.
51:48And tune in next week for the grand finale of RuPaul's Drag Race UK.
51:52Where we'll be crowning ourselves a winner, baby!
51:57I'm crazy.
51:59Now remember, if you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?
52:03Can I get an amen up in here?
52:05Amen!
52:06Alright, now let the music play.