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00:05G'day folks, it's Kenny Smythe here.
00:07Now I know what you're thinking.
00:08What's your ugly muck doing on me zombie box?
00:11Well, some jokers in TV land reckon I know a thing or two about dunnies.
00:15And when the idea of celebrating the UN year of sanitation popped into their scones,
00:19I guess I got a lot with the job of hosting the show.
00:21So come and explore the septic wonders of the world with me.
00:25Welcome to my world, Kenny's world.
00:30Yeah!
00:31Yeah!
00:33Yeah!
00:38Yeah!
00:40Yeah!
00:41Yeah!
00:42Yeah!
00:44Yeah!
00:47Yeah!
00:52Bangkok, Thailand.
00:54You know, no matter where I love in the world,
00:56I don't have to look too far to see the hard-working folk
00:59who were servicing and looking after me along the way.
01:02Good on them.
01:07For years I've heard nothing but great things about this joint and its people.
01:11The folks here are known for their polite, gentle and friendly nature.
01:15And if the trip into my hotel was any indication,
01:17the description of them is bang on.
01:23Thank you very much, mate.
01:26Oh, hello.
01:28Oh, thank you.
01:29How are you going?
01:30You know, come morning I get to meet some local pumper brothers.
01:35But for now, I'm as happy as a stray dog on bin night
01:38because my stomach and I are going out for dinner.
01:41Mate, I can't even see your DVD here.
01:43It's nowhere.
01:44Where?
01:44Well, you're trying to buy the pirate version, are you?
01:46Well, oh, man.
01:49Sounds like it.
01:50Well, it was clear I wasn't getting far on my feet,
01:53so I thought I'd give a tuk-tuk a whirl.
01:56How's Val?
01:59I'll tell you what, when you take the tuk-tuk,
02:02I think you take-take your lifelife with your own hands hands.
02:06I love it.
02:07These things are basically as fast as a Doverman with Danka rub on their tape.
02:12Here we go.
02:15Hey, Mr. Wong, where's the good place to go for dinner?
02:18A Royal Dragon.
02:20Fantastic.
02:21We'll go there, then.
02:22Sounds fantastic to move.
02:29So, having survived the motorised pram ride,
02:32I found myself at the Royal Dragon Restaurant.
02:36Now, this joint has the most off-the-dial service I have ever seen.
02:43The Guinness Book of World Records should be on to this place
02:45because it's meant to be the biggest restaurant in the world.
02:50This place is massive, mate.
02:52Fair dinkum, this place is bonkers.
02:53It takes up more than 16,000 square metres.
02:57It's got 5,000 seats, 1,000 staff, and 25,000 plates for the gruff,
03:03which means the dunnies here must cop a serious flogging.
03:06These are choice of Thai, Japanese, Korean, or European-style dishes,
03:10and the entertainment is sensational.
03:12Now, I don't know if you've ever had a problem at a restaurant
03:15where the waiters just seem to, I don't know, fly straight on past you,
03:18but this is one waiter that seems to have taken it to heart.
03:23Let me go.
03:26Holy dooly.
03:32Now, that is fast food, let me tell you.
03:35Now, anyone that can bring food to me as fast as this bloke
03:38is definitely a superhero in my book.
03:41Thanks, Super Flying Dragon Waiter Man.
03:43You've just made this chubby plumber just a little bit more chubby
03:46and a whole lot happier.
03:48Just watch out for that, uh...
03:53That's perfect, mate.
03:59You're one of the million, mate.
04:02Today, I'm hitting the road with some local Thai pumpers,
04:06but before we head out,
04:07they've asked me to write a get-well note to the king
04:09who hasn't been feeling himself lately.
04:11What a wonderful gesture,
04:12and I was humbled to be asked to be a part of it, to be honest,
04:15so I wrote a quick little take-it-easy, mate, and get plenty of rest.
04:19Good on him.
04:20Now, away we go.
04:22How do I say your name?
04:25Selie.
04:25Selie.
04:26Selie.
04:27Komchai.
04:28Komchai.
04:28Selie Komchai.
04:30Komchai.
04:31Komchai.
04:32Somchai.
04:32Yes, well, uh...
04:33Welcome to the Bomchai Puppet Truck Service.
04:36Now, I don't need to speak the language to feel at home with these boys.
04:39In Australia, I do the same job as you do.
04:43Do they make a lot of rice around here?
04:46Trust me to start a conversation with food.
04:48You know, there's no centralised plumbing system in the outer burbs,
04:51so the fellas are regularly pumping homes around these parts.
04:54Look at that little fella.
04:56Oh, in here.
04:57Here we go.
04:58It's like Australia's early days of the Dunny Cartman.
05:04So this is exactly the same as home.
05:06The boys have got the polypipe coming out and say,
05:09Liam, so I'm tired, it's getting the pipeline down there now.
05:12And as soon as you do that, boom, in we go, eh?
05:15Yeah.
05:16As you can see here, that's the water level.
05:19But as it comes all the way up, they stop it there.
05:21Otherwise, uh-oh.
05:24He knows what that means.
05:26Yes, getting freckled is the universal language in any pumper's book.
05:31But not today.
05:32Lee's boys are the real deal.
05:34That's all right.
05:34I don't mind getting dirty, mate.
05:36Don't worry about that.
05:36It's my hobby.
05:37And I was proud to be on there too.
05:41Without these pumper's, the locals would soon be living in very smelly and unhealthy surroundings,
05:45let me tell you.
05:46Oh, you can go first.
05:47You're all right.
05:47Oh, mate, all right.
05:47Thanks, guys.
05:48Oh, of course.
05:50Thanks, mate.
05:51Good for everything, isn't it?
05:52As a result, the blokes are treated with great respect and humility by the homeowners.
05:57How fantastic is that?
05:58These here are actually gifts from this lady here to thank the guys for coming.
06:02So, a very different story.
06:03They're much more appreciated than we are back home.
06:06Cheers, boys.
06:08Thank you very much.
06:09Sawadeeco.
06:10That's good work.
06:13What a sensational day out with the boys.
06:16And it makes such a difference when you feel appreciated.
06:20Everywhere we went, we were met with smiles and g'day's and how are you's.
06:23Well, at least I think that's what I was saying.
06:30And the day ended with a chance for me to treat the team to some good old-fashioned Kenny foot
06:34-to-ball
06:35and ass-to-the-floor sportsmanship.
06:38Sport and I have never been the best of mates, as you can see.
06:47What a wonderful bunch of hard-working, fun-loving blokes, but all the exercise left me starving.
06:53The boys told me I had to check out the local boat restaurant, and not just for the food.
06:57Oh, look at that.
06:58Oh, there it is there.
06:59This is what they were telling me about.
07:00Have a look at that, eh?
07:00Look at you get a view.
07:02You're rhineless right here.
07:03So while you're letting go of the lemon iced tea, so to speak, you get to look out here
07:07into the gardens.
07:12Oh, hello.
07:13I think I might have ordered a little bit too much food here.
07:16Then again, there can't be too much of a good thing, can there?
07:21Oh, good.
07:24A little bit hot.
07:26Hot all right.
07:28I'd be humming the burning ring of fire come on them, that's for sure.
07:31Oh, boy.
07:33Did you know in Thailand the word poo means crab?
07:37Just don't ask me what the word for cuttlefish is.
07:47I'm at this boat yard to check out a fascinating toilet initiative set up by the king himself.
07:54But first there's a customary acceptance of gifts.
07:57Oh, look at that.
07:58Look at that.
07:59Looks a bit like my dad.
08:03Gee whiz, there's a lot of people here.
08:06Oh, yeah.
08:07I've come to meet Captain Soon-Him and his crew.
08:09Ah, good to see you.
08:10I'm very excited because today I get to hitch a ride with them as they operate their portable
08:15Puba pontoon along the Bangkok waterways.
08:18Push.
08:19Yeah, no worries.
08:21I'll be able to catch a fish while we're here.
08:26Kenny, you got good review.
08:28A good review, what's that?
08:29He said, you know, you're the strongest man they ever had.
08:33Oh, no, man.
08:38I've got to say I could get used to this.
08:40With Thailand's answer to Martin seen at the helm, we were in good hands.
08:44Not a bad day at the office if you ask me.
08:47Especially when your office is floating down a river with the world drifting by.
08:51Bloody marvellous and wonderfully relaxing.
08:54You know, clearly the Chow Praia River is a lifeline to many thousands of people.
09:03This boat I'm standing on now, it was actually the idea of the king of Thailand.
09:07It was his idea to be able to have a floating toilet and shower block in times of need, such
09:12as a flood.
09:14You know, but times like now where there isn't a flood, they pull it along the river and they
09:18pull up in areas where they don't have decent toilet and shower facilities and the people
09:22get a chance to use it.
09:23And then they tow it behind the boat again and move along to another point.
09:26It's a great idea.
09:35We've just got one more rope to tie on and see secure because this river flows real fast.
09:44And we're docked.
09:45The toilet's come to town.
09:48And down goes the plonk planks.
09:51And now it's open for business.
09:53And I really do mean it's open for business.
09:57The pontoon dunnies are decked out with Asian style squat toilets along with the more Western
10:02style as well as a little garden hose surprise.
10:05And this here is what they call the bum gun.
10:07Now there's no mystery as to where it goes.
10:09So things will be pretty clean after you've had a go at it with that.
10:14It's not a five-star hotel, but that's not what they're trying to do.
10:17They're trying to bring toilets, decent sanitation to areas where there isn't any trouble.
10:21And let's not forget, 1.6 million people are dying a year from diarrhea.
10:24This thing, you know, this thing could be saving some lives.
10:27There's no doubt about it.
10:29So these 44-gallon drums, what they've got in them is coconut husks or the shells of a coconut
10:33and charcoal.
10:35And they pump the river water into these 44-gallon drums and that filters the water.
10:39You add a little bit of chlorine to it and hey presto, you've got yourself pretty much clean water.
10:43It's an old system, but it works all right, doesn't it Jah?
10:47These toilet boats are often used as a relief craft during floods in the monsoon season.
10:52But interestingly, a lot of this area floods with just the evening tide.
10:58The king's project, the toilet unit, is very important to the people in the community.
11:03There are about 200-300 people that can shower with clean water and also can come to the toilet.
11:17You know, at first I thought there must have been a huge yellow shirt sale on as everyone seemed to
11:22be wearing one.
11:23But no, the Thai people love their king and if the king's favourite colour is yellow, everyone wants to wear
11:29yellow.
11:29It's a sign of great respect.
11:31I wonder what old Ruddy's favourite colour is.
11:33We're stopping here for lunch.
11:35That's music for Kenny's ears, let me show you.
11:42And boy, do they put on a feast.
11:44Oh, is this to wipe them out?
11:46Yes.
11:47And of course, the old dunny serviettes are never far from reach.
11:50Sort of tight.
11:51Oh, shall I do come?
11:54I like this job.
11:55You get a beer on the job.
11:56And of course, if drinking's not your thing, there's always the nose pipe.
12:00Whatever the hell that is.
12:01But I want to work on the boat.
12:03It's better than where I work.
12:04Ask him if he'll swap.
12:15So there you go, a typical day on a Bangkok toilet boat.
12:18About as different as you can get from what I'm used to.
12:21But in another way, very much the same.
12:25But that's sanitation for you.
12:27No matter where you are in the world, it's all about going with the flow.
12:32Next stop on the Dunny Parade, Seattle, Washington.
12:36Which, as it turns out, is the town that Pooh buried.
12:42And so it was time to check out the old where do I go next chart.
12:46And grab another Sky Tram to my next destination.
12:50And so it's howdy cowdy to Seattle, Washington, USA.
12:54A town that very nearly got flushed away.
13:08Amazingly, the ground level here in the city was once the first floor level.
13:12Hard to believe I know, which is why I visited the Seattle Underground Tour Group for a first-hand goosey
13:18gander.
13:19Okay, this is it.
13:20It's a little bit Harry Potter, isn't it?
13:23Come on in.
13:24Here we go.
13:26It's an old world.
13:27Here's a picture of old-time Seattle.
13:28And you can see, this is Elliott Bay right here.
13:32You know, the biggest problem that old-time Seattle faced was that of sanitation.
13:36Seattle was built on 1,600 acres of mud flats.
13:40Much lower than it is today.
13:42So the pressure from the ocean could push back up the pipe and fire all the sewage back out of
13:46your toilet.
13:46Exactly.
13:47People reported, guys are shooting up out of their toilet bowls at heights of anywhere between three and six feet.
13:53Raw suit.
13:55They got so bad, they started to print the timetable on the front page of the paper.
13:59And, as a quick fix, a lot of people started to elevate their toilets.
14:04Look at that.
14:05So this was their kind of first temporary solution.
14:08Exactly.
14:09To the problem.
14:10Quite obviously, old-time Seattle needed some urban renewal.
14:13Yeah, yeah.
14:13And they got it completely by mistake.
14:17Accidental fire.
14:18June 6th, 1889.
14:20They woke up in the morning and they burned the city to the ground.
14:23And so with the city now flattened, the town's officials planned to raise the ground level and replumb.
14:28But the locals wouldn't have a bar of it.
14:31Why?
14:31Because it was going to take between eight and ten years.
14:34What you have are people rebuilding buildings on mudflat level and the city raising the streets alongside of it.
14:40We're on the original street level now.
14:42Yeah, this is mudflat level.
14:44Right, so what was that door we just came through upstairs?
14:47The door we just came through used to be a second story window.
14:50Oh, you see?
14:50Isn't that crazy?
14:51Seattle developed a split level system where people had to use ladders to climb up and down from elevated streets.
14:57Which was a real headache as you can imagine.
15:00And 17 people ended up dying from falls.
15:03Mostly drunk blokes bouncing home from the local saloon I imagine.
15:06Eventually they put the sidewalks in over our head.
15:10And your second floor becomes your first floor and your first floor becomes the basement.
15:14It's like a covered shopping mall.
15:16That's unbelievable.
15:17Yep, they had to have street lights burning down here day and night.
15:21How many underground blocks are there in Seattle?
15:23It's an area that extends for 32 square blocks.
15:26That's unbelievable.
15:28You know, Seattle's underground became home to many speakeasies and crime during the Prohibition era.
15:33So a lot of criminal activity took place in these underground spaces.
15:36Gambling halls, opium dens, through prohibition of alcohol.
15:39Is that where the word, the underworld, comes from?
15:41Maybe.
15:42Wastelocks and refuge started to build up.
15:44And in 1907 the growing rat problem caused a minor bubonic plague breakout.
15:49To get rid of the rat problem they put a bounty out on rats.
15:53If you kill a rat you get paid.
15:54Yeah, you kill a rat, you had to prove you killed a rat so you cut off the tail.
15:57You save that part.
15:58You take a rat body and burn it.
15:59The whole time being very careful of the fleas.
16:02It's a lot of work if you ask me.
16:03So if someone didn't have money, maybe that's where the expression came from, you don't give a rat's arse.
16:08That could be.
16:08Because if you do give a rat's arse you don't have a few load of money.
16:11At this point the lower level was sealed off for good.
16:14And people more or less forgot about it until the 1960s when it was rediscovered by uni students
16:19who would come down and explore the various sections and groups.
16:24This spawned the idea of a tourist attraction which is still running even today.
16:30Are you guys all with me so far?
16:31The streets are up there.
16:32The sidewalks are here.
16:33That's the first floor of the building.
16:34So this here is actually a water pipe but it's been hollowed out of timber.
16:38So it's a timber water pipe.
16:39How fantastic is this, eh?
16:41It's basically a time capsule of the early 20th century.
16:45Perfectly preserved beneath the bustling streets of modern day Seattle.
16:50This is parts of the underground that are still working today.
16:53That's a shop in here with a lady buying some books.
16:56There's also a small museum inside which has many old photographs and antiques from old Seattle.
17:03As well as this little beauty.
17:05And there's a toilet there on the witness stand.
17:08One of the original Crapper toilets.
17:09That's where the nickname Crapper came from.
17:11Thomas Crapper.
17:12And look at that, look at that for a hit.
17:14If people want to run a horror tour I can leave the photo with me.
17:18I'm going to give you the souvenirs.
17:19Oh look at that, you do give a rat's arse.
17:21That's right.
17:22Cheers mate.
17:23So much.
17:23I'm from Australia.
17:24Let's have a beer, eh?
17:25I will.
17:26Cheers mate.
17:27Thanks again.
17:27See you later.
17:28Well, now I've seen it all.
17:29A whole city buried because the sewerage wouldn't flush down the dunnies.
17:36You may be interested to know that toilets have long been a means of communication throughout
17:41many of the world's prisons.
17:43There was the old string and hook message where inmate A has a piece of string with a
17:47note on it and inmate B in another cell has a piece of string with a hook on it.
17:52They flush their toilets together, their strings get tangled and inmate B is able to retrieve
17:58his message.
17:59Pretty simple stuff.
18:00And there's my personal favourite, the old scoop out the water and whisper into the bowl
18:04method.
18:05The only problem with this one was that quite often there was more than just the intended
18:09inmate listening in on the conversation.
18:15Next up, I hit the big apple and meet Dr. Germs.
18:34This is the little wall.
18:35The little wall?
18:36This is the wall, Billy Wall.
18:38Yeah, it is a world of its own, isn't it?
18:40You know New York, you know the whole world.
18:42New Yorkers are the friendly people.
18:44I would say New Yorkers are the friendliest people.
18:47I'm on my way to meet up with one of America's top microbiologists, a Dr. Charles P. Gerber.
18:53We're heading to your lab, doctor.
18:55Or as he likes to be called, Dr. Germs.
18:57This is the lab.
18:58It's good.
18:58When I started my career, I used to do this by mouth.
19:01It's really bad if you had the hiccups.
19:03Let me tell you.
19:04Yeah, this is a germ meter.
19:06Now, these devices may look like something out of a 007 movie.
19:09But the information they reveal is anything but fantasy.
19:12You actually get droplets being ejected out.
19:16How far do they get?
19:17Oh, at least three or four feet.
19:19Three or four feet.
19:20Yeah.
19:20Oh, yeah.
19:20Germs can come as far as this.
19:22That's correct, yeah.
19:23That's a bit lowy.
19:24If you keep a toothbrush there, in this bathroom we're in now, the germs would go from the bowl
19:29to your toothbrush.
19:30That's right, yes.
19:31Dr. Germs' instruments measure the units of bacteria on any given surface.
19:36You get a relative idea how clean this toilet is.
19:38And I couldn't believe the results.
19:40Here we go.
19:40Three, two, one.
19:42Watch the judgement.
19:43Oh, yeah.
19:44But this is a really clean toilet.
19:46That's great.
19:47Let's try it.
19:48Usually a good spot.
19:50Oh, the sunshine.
19:50Oh, yeah.
19:51Look at that.
19:52And it was 35 under the toilet seat and the sink is nearly 3,000.
19:58I'm going to wash my hands in there.
20:01Well, if I was a microbiologist from another planet and I looked at the data, I'd probably
20:06take a dump in your sink, you know, and prepare my meal in your bathroom.
20:10You would.
20:11Yeah.
20:11Okay, well, I've got to ask.
20:12Keyboards on a computer.
20:13Oh, those are really germy.
20:15Keyboards, because nobody ever disinfects and cleans them.
20:18And there are really, on average, about 200 times more fecal bacteria on a cutting board
20:24than a toilet seat in a home.
20:25I'm working with a cleaner apparatus than a secretary and a chef.
20:30You know, if I ever tries to kiss somebody's hand, they're going to come out of a toilet
20:33and not make a meal for me.
20:37Dr. Germs has even given advice on water recycling systems for both the NASA space shuttle
20:42and the Russian Mir space station.
20:44And has even been a consultant on a number of recent NASA space missions.
20:48Material, I think a lot of people think everything goes out into space all the time, but unfortunately,
20:52it could be a hazard.
20:53Well, the number twos could fly back and...
20:55Right, that's right.
20:56You don't want to be the number two.
20:58That's for sure.
20:59It becomes freeze-dried.
21:00It's like a rock.
21:01Oh, really?
21:01It could do serious damage to the spacecraft.
21:07This actually can tell us, you know, whether we got E. coli coliforms.
21:12Dr. Germs loves his work so much, he even named his son after bacteria.
21:19And that's after the name of coli.
21:21Right, that's right.
21:22And he's okay with that?
21:23Oh, yeah, yeah.
21:24He didn't mind that.
21:25But my wife wouldn't let me name any other kids after bacteria.
21:28Now, a lot of people would find that a bit strange naming your kid after a profession,
21:31but I reckon good on him.
21:33When I had his son, I thought about naming him Henry or Bob.
21:35But me missus wouldn't have a bar of it.
21:38Dr. Germs and I then set off to a local restaurant to put his tools to the test.
21:43Have a look at that.
21:45I still can't believe it.
21:47I'll never look at toilet seats and restaurant tables the same.
21:50Let's go back to the bathroom.
21:51I hear that.
21:52Get me out of here.
21:57Well, folks, that's it for now.
21:59But join me next time when I travel further into the USA
22:01and across the land of pizzas and rustle crows
22:04to see the wonders that lift the lid on all things popular.
22:08And voila, you've got yourself your very own little bum biscuit.
22:12Fudge nugget, whatever you want to call it.
22:13So, take care, be good to yourselves,
22:15and hey, give a stranger a smile, eh?
22:17Good on yous.
22:19Stephen Bestwick, who's your chef, friend of mine,
22:23you've always had a go at me for being a plumber and working with toilets.
22:26Wrong.
22:27Wrong.
22:27You work with cutting boards?
22:29Disgusting.
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