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00:00Jenny, I'm doing pancakes. I've got you a real nice pancake.
00:02Oh, lovely.
00:03Pancake, ain't it?
00:04Yeah, what am I having?
00:05A pancake.
00:06Is it sweet or is it...
00:07Sweet.
00:08Mince, oh.
00:09It's a sweet one.
00:10Oh, go on then.
00:10We shouldn't have had it to do...
00:12No, I've just done it for you.
00:13Oh, you know.
00:14Look.
00:16Oh, Lee.
00:19Oh, I love that.
00:21My teeth don't look like that, do they?
00:23That's not your teeth, that's your tash.
00:25Oh, this is your cheeky sweat.
00:28I think it looks like you.
00:30Look.
00:32My tash.
00:35No!
00:37Oh.
00:38What an entrance.
00:39I'm living for this.
00:40Taser in.
00:41Oh.
00:42We don't talk like this all.
00:43I don't think so.
00:45Oh, here we go.
00:46What is that?
00:47Oh, shut up.
00:49This doesn't look real.
00:50I don't think it is.
00:51A framboisier.
00:52What's a framboisier?
00:54Oh, I knew it.
00:55No.
00:56This looks dodgy, doesn't it?
00:57Does?
00:57Why is it dodgy?
00:59This is going to go down so badly.
01:01None of us learn, do we?
01:03Wow.
01:05I hate you.
01:06Must remember that bellend.
01:08This is what everyone came for.
01:11The lamp bells were ringing with me, Mary.
01:13At least the nipples are covered.
01:14Yeah.
01:15It's half the battle.
01:16In the week Barack Obama said the aliens were real,
01:20all, we enjoyed lots of great telly.
01:23The gladiators were flexing on BBC One.
01:27Trying to escape from Comet.
01:33She's so cute.
01:35She's giving glamorous.
01:37We're the same height but totally different physique.
01:46We're like a before and after shot.
01:50Netflix wouldn't let a wall get in the way of true love.
01:53Connor?
01:54Yes?
01:54From the moment I met you, I knew I met my perfect match.
01:58Really, it's just like the next level dating app, but without a photograph.
02:03Oh, okay.
02:04Well, what do you think?
02:05When we met on the app, yes, you see some photographs of someone.
02:08There could have been anybody.
02:09Could have been anyone.
02:10Yeah.
02:11I mean, you thought I was a bloke, didn't you?
02:13And ghosts didn't you?
02:13Not from the photographs.
02:16You hadn't shaved that day.
02:20And there was desk-based daylight robbery on Prime Video.
02:25On your feet!
02:26Hands in the air!
02:28Hands in the air!
02:29We used to get shotlifters all the time when I worked in town.
02:32It was brilliant.
02:32I just loved the drama of it.
02:34You know, I wasn't on security, so I didn't care less.
02:37And plus, you know, some people, if they're stealing, like, kids' clothes or whatever,
02:43just turn a blind eye.
02:45They mustn't eat it.
02:46And that is why Debenhams is no longer on the high street.
02:57In Leeds...
02:58Going on a date tomorrow.
02:59With someone else?
03:00Yeah.
03:00You lie!
03:01No.
03:02Chat to me, where you going?
03:04Bowling.
03:04Best friends Danielle and Daniella.
03:08Nice.
03:09Because apparently my personality doesn't come out over a coffee,
03:12but my personality might come out in a positive way over bowling.
03:15I'm going to be honest.
03:16I'm really competitive.
03:17You're competitive and you're an arsehole.
03:19I know, but I'm going to pretend I'm not tomorrow.
03:23I'm going to wait until we're married!
03:26On Saturday night, famous faces in fancy dress were having a sing-song on ITV.
03:32Nothing says episode finale like a glass of Prosecco.
03:37The only good thing about this programme, Charles, is it's the final.
03:41Which will allow us time for our brain cells to regenerate.
03:45Regenerate.
03:45Having been turned to mush by watching it.
03:47Who are ya, who are ya, who's that behind the mask?
03:52Woo!
03:54Who's behind the mask?
03:55That's an older version.
03:57Who's behind the mask like?
03:59First up tonight, they came, they saw.
04:02Will they conquer?
04:03It's conquer!
04:05Oh!
04:06See what he did there.
04:07Who chose to dress up as a conquer?
04:09I love a conquer.
04:12Look out for clues, Daniela.
04:14There's clues in here.
04:16Every jest has been an adventure, but now, reality.
04:20Reality?
04:21Does that mean a reality show?
04:23See, when they talk in this silly voice, you don't know who's what, where, when.
04:27They sound the same, don't they?
04:28I'm having kittens just thinking about it.
04:31Kittens?
04:32Pussycat dolls.
04:33Cat, Deely.
04:34Cat.
04:34It could be Cat, Deely, Nattie.
04:38Used to count him down.
04:39Countdown!
04:40Jimmy Carr.
04:41Oh, there's it.
04:43He won't be on this shit, will he?
04:44Who's the presenter of Countdown?
04:46Carol Voldemort, or whatever she's called.
04:51I woke up today with this feeling
04:55The better things are coming my way
04:58It's not a...
04:59It's not a pussycat doll, is it?
05:01Why?
05:02Cos the bloke.
05:03And if the sun shine as a meaning
05:05It's telling me not to let things get in the way
05:08I know that voice.
05:10Yeah, that's definitely not a singer that.
05:12Yeah, they're seeing it.
05:14Yeah, they're seeing it.
05:15Come on up, let go down, baby
05:17Take a good look around
05:20This is a terrible forced jealousy, isn't it?
05:23Oh, who the bloody hell could it be?
05:24Susie Dent, baby
05:26She's no cockney, mum
05:28Get on the...
05:30Yeah!
05:31CHEERING
05:34Who do you think is behind the moth?
05:36Absolutely no idea
05:38What about him off this morning?
05:42Who?
05:42McDermott
05:46Oh, it's moth
05:47Oh, she's brilliant
05:49You usually find me singing Uptown with the girls
05:52Uptown with the girls
05:54Flare East
05:55Cos she sang Uptown Funk
05:57I'm running rings around those other moth singers
06:01Hoops, rings, Olympics
06:03Olympics, right
06:03Kelly Holmes
06:04Oh, I've not got a clue with all this
06:08I want to take a bit of time
06:11Oh, a little time
06:13A little time to think things over
06:17Let me listen to the voice
06:23Whoever the fuck this is can sing anyway, jeez
06:26With a voice like that, that's got to be a professional
06:29Oh, I love her voice
06:35This is Janet Jackson, this, Soph
06:37I'm telling you now
06:38Is it shite?
06:40I wanna know what love is
06:43I wanna know what love is
06:46I do think it's Flare East
06:49And I can't even remember now
06:50Why I said that
06:51I want you to show me
06:52Uptown
06:54I wanna feel what love is
06:57You're right into it, huh?
06:59I wanna feel what love is
07:01It's got to be someone from a UK girl band, isn't it?
07:04Like Mystique
07:05Sugar Babes
07:06What about Mucha Bueno?
07:10She gotta win it, love
07:12Mars gotta win it
07:13Without a shadow of a doubt
07:15After revealing the champion
07:17It's Mum!
07:20Yes!
07:21Deserved and all
07:22We got to see who was who
07:25Take it off!
07:26Take it off!
07:29Take it off!
07:30Take it off!
07:30Take it off!
07:33Take it off!
07:34Take it off!
07:35Oh my God!
07:36What the fuck?
07:37No!
07:39Ben Shepard?
07:40I guessed it was Cat Dealey, Natty
07:44But I'd forgotten that it was a man singing
07:47I think he was doing something else
07:48Was he climbing them out or something?
07:50Yeah
07:50Ben Shepard's a multi-talented man
07:52He does sky sports as well
07:54Good mark, here's our 2026 champion
07:57And it is time!
07:59Oh, here we go
07:59Come on!
08:00Let's see who it is then
08:01Come on, Mars!
08:02Take it off!
08:04Take it off!
08:06So, once again
08:06Park your brain
08:07At the reception
08:09And join them
08:10In saying
08:10Take it off
08:12Take it off
08:14Take it off!
08:16Take it off!
08:17Take it off!
08:19Take it off!
08:21Take it off!
08:21It's Keisha!
08:23It's Keisha!
08:26Yeah!
08:27From her sugar bathes
08:29Oh, it's her at a sugar bathes!
08:32You were close with one of the sugar bathes
08:34You just got the wrong babe
08:35Put it this way
08:36When I was trying to describe me image
08:40It was Ben Shepard here
08:43But McDermott here
08:45It's not McDermott
08:49What's his first name?
08:51Dermott
08:53What's his second name?
08:54It's Dermott or Levy
08:55Why am I calling him McDermott?
08:57I don't know
08:57Has anyone ever called him that before?
09:03In Surrey
09:04Why is it that as soon as something happens in this house
09:08Everyone screams my name
09:10Dad!
09:11The power went off yesterday
09:12We had a power cut
09:14Sarah, her husband Andre
09:16And their daughter Shay
09:17All the lights gone off
09:19And Aidan turns around to me
09:20Like, Dad
09:20What's happened?
09:22I was like
09:22We got a power cut
09:23Two seconds later
09:24Who is it shouting down the stairs?
09:27Shay
09:27Dad!
09:28Dad!
09:29There's no power!
09:30I'm like
09:30Yes, Shay
09:31It's called a power cut
09:32Fix it!
09:33Everything is
09:34Dad!
09:35Dad!
09:36Yes, Shay
09:37Yes, Aidan
09:38Yes, Sarah
09:39What do you want me to do?
09:41No, no, because Shay came into the room
09:43When I was watching TV
09:44Yeah, and I was
09:45Did you do?
09:46Did you?
09:47I said, yeah
09:48And I said, go and ask her, Dad
09:49Oh, is that what your fault then?
09:52Dad!
09:53On Tuesday night
09:54We got some cost-cutting tips
09:56For our holidays on Channel 4
09:58This is right up your Strava, isn't it, Padders?
10:01Surprised you haven't got a little notebook out
10:03It's all going in, aren't you, Worry?
10:05I'll tell you what
10:06If you watch this
10:07And you book a holiday
10:09And it's a good price
10:10I'll be amazed
10:12Yeah
10:12Because you can't even check in online
10:16Is there anything more satisfying and exciting
10:21Than being on holiday?
10:24No!
10:24No, it depends where you are
10:26And who you're with
10:28Why are you looking at me like that?
10:30Because every time we've gone on holiday together
10:32There's always been a fucking disaster
10:34Yes, a bargain holiday, of course
10:37Okay
10:38Okay, chat to me
10:39Everybody loves a bargain, don't they?
10:41This time, I'm going all in
10:44On that oh-so-indulgent
10:47All-singing
10:48All-dancing holiday
10:49The all-inclusive
10:51I love an all-inclusive
10:53I never, ever go all-inclusive
10:55That is criminal
10:57Cancun
10:57Let's go to Cancun
10:59Let's go to Cancun, Mary
11:01Well, Philip said we should go there, actually
11:03Philip?
11:04Wetton
11:05Oh, yeah
11:08When you go to all-inclusive
11:11You...
11:11As soon as you open your eyes
11:13The trick is to start drinking
11:15Like me and Ben love an 8am gin on the balcony
11:18But this is the problem
11:19It's scroats like you
11:22That take the piss
11:24And ruin it for everybody else
11:29Secrets of...
11:30No
11:31I like a bit of mystery
11:32I'll tell you
11:33We love a buffet
11:34I will tell you what the secret is
11:35You actually love a buffet
11:36You've got to stop going for the carbs
11:38You need to fill up on the meat and the seafood
11:41That is how you get your buck's worth
11:45With so much choice
11:47All free
11:48It's hard not to go overboard
11:50At the buffet
11:51It'd be so easy to overindulge
11:53Yes, you can pile your plate
11:55With anything you want
11:56And then go back for seconds
11:57Well, you see
11:58You can't on the manjaro
12:00It'd be no good
12:00But there is a good reason
12:02To plate your food thoughtfully
12:04Plate it thoughtfully?
12:06Yeah
12:06It's called your waistline, isn't it?
12:10I'm meeting Professor Barry Smith
12:12An expert in the psychology
12:14Behind our food choices
12:16Of course a Barry Smith
12:17Would suck the fun out of an all-inclusive
12:20What else was Barry Smith
12:21Put on this world for?
12:23Seriously, son
12:23I mean, you eat with your eyes
12:24Professor Barry Smith
12:25Is that what he's going to say?
12:27He's going to tell me
12:28How to get maximum pleasure
12:30From my all-inclusive smash and grabs
12:32Is he going to tell us
12:33How to eat at a buffet?
12:35You know what?
12:35I need this
12:36I need this
12:36I'm disgusted
12:37No, I need this
12:38I think they're eating too much into this
12:40You just get your plate of food
12:42And sit down and eat it
12:42We eat first with our eyes
12:44You say, that looks delicious
12:45Oh, I tell you what
12:46He's on the ball, eh
12:47He is
12:48Oh!
12:49I could be Professor Jane Minty, really
12:52And even in the buffet
12:53It's spread out in a way that's attractive
12:55So don't undo all that work by piling everything on the same plate in a haphazard way
13:03Don't like that
13:04You know when you see it piled up like that
13:06I don't like that
13:07I think that looks horrible
13:09I'd rather go up ten times
13:11Well, you do
13:12I have to say
13:13I have been guilty of piling far too many things on my plate at a buffet
13:19Yep, that is you
13:20I'm with you, darling
13:21That is you
13:22100%
13:23Hundy-pundy
13:23Get there
13:24And that's
13:24Fuck, there's pasta
13:25Let's put a bit of that on
13:27It's still there
13:28You're just going
13:28Is it matter that carbonara doesn't really go with berf-boguignon?
13:32Oh, no
13:33Wrang
13:33We have to be our own chefs, as it were, and think, what's the right menu here?
13:39Oh, where's the fun in that?
13:41No, I like it
13:42I like the orderliness of it all
13:44No, I don't like that this guy's trying to tell me how to eat my dinner
13:47Arrange it in such a way as it would be attractive if you were offering that plate to someone else
13:52No, I'd be naffed, wouldn't I, trying to build a plate for you, huh?
13:56Yeah
13:57Well, it started off with a bit of dried bread
13:59Yeah
14:01Chips
14:02Chips, yeah
14:03Chicken
14:04Just chicken
14:05And dried bread
14:06Bit of dried bread
14:08Shirley's happy
14:09I mean, we can arrange stuff so that it doesn't, things don't cross-contaminate
14:13Like, I wouldn't want me Indian touching my Chinese and my Chinese touching me British, do you know what I
14:17mean?
14:19Sounds like reform
14:31In Manchester
14:32Sean, seeing what your dad did
14:34Give me this for Valentine's Day, I saw it
14:37The diamond stub
14:38I bought me something jewellery-ish
14:40Got it out of the bag
14:42Box of chocolates
14:43The Malones
14:44It's the thought that counts, isn't it?
14:46Valentine's Day
14:47Why would you put it in a diamond bag?
14:51A diamond store bag
14:53Why would you do that?
14:55It's pleasing on the eye
14:56You know, it's...
14:58Ta-da!
15:00Chocolates
15:01What have you given chocolates to Sean for, anyway?
15:06On Saturday night, we were back in Sheffield with the fittest people on telly
15:15I went in my mouth
15:16You know when you used to go to the gym for that one time?
15:19Yeah
15:20What was the best apparatus you used to use? Did you use one?
15:23The toilet
15:23I used to go sit on it for a sit-down
15:30Do you know what somebody was saying to me the other day
15:32That they exercise for the mental health
15:34And I actually think that exercise makes my mental health worse
15:37Like, I'm being serious, I hate that much
15:41In the programme, contenders Helena and Nicky
15:44Were ready to face off in the final game
15:50Oh, this is the...
15:52This is my favourite
15:53Never been to a gym in my life
15:54I would rather stick pins at my as I go to a gym
15:58Contenders, ready!
16:01Come on, girls
16:02Three, two, one
16:05Oh!
16:07Here goes Nicky with the first hurdle
16:09Oh, awkward landing
16:11That might have jarred
16:12Oh, Nicky!
16:13Oh, that'll cost her
16:15The second hurdle was a little bit awkward for Nicky, too
16:18Let's see what a rocker body strength's like
16:19Oh, she's just a weird girl
16:21Look at her
16:21I just could not do that
16:23It's a real struggle
16:24Nicky can't get her feet on the platform
16:27Use her legs
16:28Use her legs up the rope
16:29Nicky really struggling
16:31As Helena gets onto the overhead
16:32Nicky's not getting up that rope at all, Jay
16:35No
16:35Finally
16:36Nicky is up there
16:37Oh, she's on
16:38Oh!
16:39And jumps for the first rug of the ladder
16:41But she's gone
16:42She missed it
16:43Oh, no
16:43She must have had slippy hands
16:46Slippy neck
16:47Don't laugh
16:48Don't laugh at our Nicky, bless her
16:50Well, it's wide open now for Helena to go through and win this eliminator
16:54Helena's won this
16:55She's just got to take her time now, hasn't it?
16:58Nicky takes on the rope once more
17:00Oh, she could hardly get up it
17:01The first time's got no fucking chance this time, hasn't she?
17:04She needs someone to bellow in her ear
17:07You've got this!
17:10Here we go
17:11It does the same thing
17:12Nicky is up there
17:13Another jump and another fall
17:16Again!
17:16Oh, fucking
17:17I think I'd give up at that stage
17:20I could have a gin and tonic
17:21Not a hope in hell
17:22A mistake-free finish
17:24And she's on the ladder
17:26What, they're giving her a ladder?
17:28What's that about?
17:29Reasonable adjustments
17:31That's what that is
17:32You know what?
17:33Now I've seen that ladder
17:34I might enter this
17:35All Nicky can do is keep going
17:38If I ever get on gladiators
17:39I want to go against Nicky
17:40I can't wait to see her on the zip line
17:43Straight on the deck
17:44Straight deck
17:45Now for the travelator
17:47She takes a moment to look around
17:49Here we go
17:50The humble eater
17:52Helena's going insultingly slow, isn't she?
17:54Yeah, I know
17:55Here goes Helena
17:56Come on, Helena!
17:58Go on, Helena!
18:00First run of the travelator
18:01Game?
18:02Simon?
18:03She's not making any progress, Mary
18:05And she's going to run out of steam here
18:07Oh, no, she's collapsed!
18:09That's not very good, is it?
18:11She's still got ages, though
18:12And all of a sudden
18:14There's a confident stride
18:16About Nicky and Blue
18:17Helena, get up there
18:18She's behind you
18:19She'll be able to sense
18:21That Nicky is now close behind
18:23Oh, no!
18:24Oh, she's got a game
18:26Let's go
18:27That she might be even closer
18:28In a moment
18:29Oh, oh!
18:30Have they had so much strength before this show?
18:34Ah!
18:34Not even on a piece of apparatus
18:36And she's falling over
18:37Nicky's falling over a flat floor
18:39I've never seen an eliminator like this
18:42Wait, is Nicky going to do it?
18:43Surely Nicky can't win
18:44Because she used the ladder
18:45Can Nicky achieve the impossible?
18:48This one!
18:49Come on, Nicky!
18:50Is it worth it, ladies?
18:52Yet another ball
18:54Means she has to start again
18:55Wait, this has gone down to the wire, hasn't it?
18:58And they go together
18:59Come on!
19:00Oh, my God
19:01Oh, my goodness
19:03Who's got it left in them?
19:05Go on!
19:06Go on!
19:06Go on!
19:07Come on, Helena!
19:08Come on, run, run, run, run, run!
19:10It's a powerful run here
19:12Helena's made it out!
19:13Oh, wow!
19:14She's up!
19:15Helena's up!
19:16And she holds on!
19:18Well done
19:19What a fight!
19:20She's been so, so determined to finish
19:23Finally!
19:25But you know what?
19:25You've got to give it to Nicky
19:26For just catching up
19:28Yeah
19:28Fair play
19:29She gave it her best
19:31If at first you don't succeed
19:32Try and try
19:34And then get a set of steps out
19:40In Leeds
19:41Well, Margaret's back from her holiday
19:43And I haven't heard a peep from her
19:46Well, I've heard off her this morning
19:48And I thought, no
19:48I'm too happy to see you today
19:51I thought, I'm busy for the next 11 days
19:53I just want to have a chilled, slow morning at home
19:55Sisters Ellie and Izzy
19:58And then Ezra's a little bit unwell as well
20:01But I've not told anybody about it really
20:04Apart from Mum maybe, I'm not sure
20:06And Katie texted me saying
20:09Oh, I've heard Ezra's not well
20:11So I think that Mum's told Margaret
20:13Margaret's told Katie
20:15And Katie's sexed me
20:16That's exactly what's happened
20:18Yeah
20:19I thought, Jesus Christ
20:21You don't need a town crier with relatives like her
20:24No
20:24This week, we were back in the box
20:27Looking for love on Netflix
20:28Love can be quite blind, can't it?
20:31If you think about it
20:32Because you see some people together
20:35And you just go, that
20:36Isn't really right
20:40You have to see somebody
20:42Yeah, but you're lookest
20:43I'm totally lookest
20:44100%
20:45I'm judgy
20:46I judge you
20:47Yeah
20:53Kevin
20:54Is talking to two girls
20:56And he's leading them both on
20:59Not picked between the two of them yet
21:01But he's letting each one think they're the only one
21:05I'm just going to say it
21:06Because I just can't
21:07With this whole fucking secret of shit
21:08Like, it's me and Kia
21:09Oh, wow
21:10Tyler's going to make Kevin choose here
21:12Me or her, let's go
21:13You and Kia have been phenomenal
21:17I don't want to fucking let anybody down
21:19Oh
21:20Oh, you got to
21:21I don't know what your journey is with Kia
21:24But what I would need, like, today
21:28Is for you to
21:30Choose me
21:31Exactly
21:31Only be dating me
21:33I've been put on the spot like that a few times, bro
21:38I guarantee he's going to deflect this
21:40And not make a choice
21:41You've been just
21:44So fucking steady rock
21:47Fighting for it
21:48So fucking steady rock
21:50Like, wow
21:52Then pick her
21:54Who you waiting for?
21:56That's true love right there
21:57That's fucking true love
22:00Why do you have to swear all the time, Kevin?
22:02He does have a potty mouth, doesn't he?
22:04So what you going to do, Kevin?
22:07She's done with the bullshit there, Kevin
22:09What you going to do?
22:10She's pinning his down
22:11I am choosing
22:13Yes
22:15Fucking Tyler
22:15Oh, I don't like the F word being used
22:17Fucking Tyler, this is truly
22:19You didn't say that
22:21You didn't?
22:21You didn't
22:22Are we, like, official?
22:25You are currently my girl
22:28Currently
22:29Don't know what's going to happen later on in your date
22:31But right now
22:33We're good
22:33I mean, if you think about it
22:34You know, Paige is currently my wife
22:36That's your current wife
22:37Yeah, that's the current wife
22:39Sounds like bloody Henry VIII
22:41Tyler still had a few questions
22:43About Kevin's other love interest
22:45Is there any parts of you
22:47That feel like you have
22:48Like, feelings of love for her?
22:51Oh, hang on
22:52The answer here is no
22:55No, none
22:56She's dead to me
22:57Is he going to know that?
22:59Love is a very strong word
23:05I'm thinking more
23:07But I will say
23:09I'm definitely, you know
23:10Bonding, exchange gifts
23:12It's relating to a lot of
23:14A lot of stuff
23:17What?
23:18Spit it out, Kevin
23:19He's kind of not saying anything
23:21How are you going to tell me that?
23:23You literally asked me to be your girlfriend
23:25I don't know if he asked you
23:27I think you asked him to ask you
23:29Yeah
23:30I'm going to go
23:31There we go
23:32Oh, she's going
23:32Well, she's laid it on the table
23:35Kevin, what are you going to do?
23:36Well, he's going to use that as an excuse
23:37To go with the other girl now
23:38You reckon?
23:39She's too feisty
23:40She's too much
23:41I think it might draw him closer
23:42Tyler, don't go
23:44This man has no conviction to his words like this
23:48Don't go
23:49Don't go
23:50Please, you're the love of my life
23:52I fucking love you
23:58Tyler makes me feel like she may be the one
24:00Oh, he's choosing Tyler
24:03So I'm ready to see if she's available
24:05And she's ready to see me
24:07Okay
24:07The next day
24:09Hey
24:14Tyler?
24:15What? Is she there?
24:17I bet she hasn't turned up
24:18Hello, hello
24:22Go away
24:23She's not there
24:24She's gone
24:25She's pushed off
24:30Oh, no
24:32Nobody's on the other side
24:35Now, that's the wake-up call, isn't it?
24:38Yeah, well, plan B now
24:39Plan B
24:40Uh, Kaya
24:42Hey
24:42Hi
24:44Oh, you'll be cool
24:45Jesus Christ
24:46God knows where this is going to go
24:48How are we feeling?
24:50We are feeling good
24:51I'm like, Kaya, listen
24:52I know I didn't choose you
24:54But I choose you now
24:55That's all that matters
24:56All I know is that Kaya is one of one
25:00Kaya is here
25:03Unlike Tyler
25:04My heart has always been loving and caring for you
25:10I think he's listened to one too many R&B albums, son
25:13What a load of bloody cock and bull
25:16Jeepers, has he heard himself?
25:18Kevin, oh my God
25:19Oh, she's buying it
25:21She's bought it
25:22Kaya, don't listen to his crap
25:25I'll be honest
25:26Like, I asked Tyler if we want to try to make something happen
25:29And then Tyler went home
25:32I didn't want to see her go either
25:34You know
25:34Yeah
25:34Stop
25:35Kevin, I have love for you
25:37And you've said so many, so many kind words to me
25:40Here we go
25:41I fail a boat
25:42She ain't no fool
25:43Do you reckon?
25:44I think she's fooling for it
25:45However
25:47Yes, conjunction is clart
25:48It's not even a but, it's a however
25:50A little bit
25:51Formal
25:52I have to stand on business when I say that you are not the one for me
25:55Well played
25:58Clock here
25:59Yes, know your worth
26:00Run, Mark, yeah, Kevin
26:01Move on, go ahead
26:06Get your shit together, you know
26:07Yeah
26:08And be great
26:11Can you remind me of the names of the other girls that's in the room?
26:14I bet he goes back in there and goes, yeah, what's your fucking off?
26:18Jeez
26:19Fucking hard work, I told you
26:21Topped
26:21Somebody else's problem now
26:32In Wiltshire
26:33Come on up here, Merlin
26:34Where's his arm holes?
26:37Wait a minute, that's his head hole, isn't it?
26:39No
26:40Where's the other hole, Giles?
26:42Giles and his wife, Mary
26:44Can you be more cooperative, Merlin?
26:46Yeah, and then
26:48And then, that'll help him get through the cold spell, Notting
26:51That's it
26:52The cold snap
26:54This is another cold snap, Mary
26:56Look at him, isn't he divine?
26:58Yes, now pull it back down again, otherwise it's going to look like
27:01You see, he likes it with a hood
27:03Yes, oh, that's much better with a hood, isn't it?
27:06And he looks like
27:06Now, look at his beard now, he looks like Santa Claus
27:09Now I'll give him a treat
27:10Now he looks like Noddy Holder
27:12On Friday, ITV News was celebrating Downing Street's most popular resident
27:18Come here
27:19Hello
27:19Come here
27:20Come here, what's this?
27:21Come on
27:23Oh
27:24Straight upstairs
27:25OK, bye then
27:26Have you ever had that ball of cheese starter?
27:31I forget what it's called, but it's just a ball of cheese
27:35That hot cheese
27:38I don't know if it's hot, but it's nice
27:41Can't remember it that much, but it was very nice
27:43Just a ball of cheese
27:45And finally, there have been many comings and goings in Downing Street over the past 15 years
27:50Telling me
27:50And how
27:52And how
27:52A revolving door
27:54But throughout it all, there's one resident who's successfully kept his nose out of the dirty business of politics
27:59The cat
28:00The cat
28:01The cat
28:01Yeah, Larry
28:02Has he died?
28:03No
28:04Larry the cat was first brought in to clean out the rats in 2011
28:08He's since gone on to worldwide fame
28:10I reckon that explains why the comings and goings at Downing Street have been so much
28:14He's been kicking their ass out
28:16Oh, yeah
28:16Oi
28:17Thank you very much
28:20He's served six prime ministers
28:23I'll tell you what, if that cat could speak
28:25Oh
28:25Forming close friendships with some
28:28I like how he's got his ass all up in Boris's face
28:30I want to do that as well
28:31Less so with others
28:34Yeah, Larry ain't feeling you
28:35No one wants to get stroked by Liz Truss
28:38It was these repeated appearances
28:40Oh, the rat flying across, look
28:42Ew
28:42That convinced Downing Street staff it was better to have headlines about cats than rats
28:48They do say you're never too far from a rat in London, though, don't they?
28:51They do say, yeah
28:52Yeah, more so in Downing Street
28:54It led them to Battersea Dogs and Cats Home
28:57Where Larry was described as a bit of a bruiser
29:00Quite a big van for him to be delivered in
29:02Yeah, I don't know if that's necessary
29:03He could have gone on an Uber
29:04In 2011, he was adopted by then Prime Minister David Cameron
29:09Oh, so Cameron got him
29:11Oh, yeah
29:11He fucked off
29:12Yeah
29:13And then left the cat as well
29:14Well, he left us
29:15He left a sinking ship and a moggy
29:17Early on, Larry seemed a little overwhelmed by his new surroundings
29:23Look at that hair tag round his neck from Rags to Riches
29:27I wonder if he goes back to Basse City like to give tugs
29:30Yeah
29:32Ted Tug
29:33I was once in your cages
29:35Listen here, you lot, there's chance out there for you
29:42So I was in Wetherspoons, okay
29:44And I was talking to this girl
29:46And I was really, you know, putting on the really good smooth talk
29:49And I was like, I'll get you a pint
29:51Michael, Sally and their sons, Jake and Harry
29:54The pint in Wetherspoon is £1.99, okay, yeah
29:57So I went off and I was like, yeah, nah, I got you
30:00And I went up, yeah, pulled it, went to pay
30:02And then my card declined
30:03Oh my God
30:04It was the most embarrassing thing
30:06It's a £1.99 drink
30:08And I was like, yo, I was like, yo, Nathan, Nathan, come here
30:10I need you to go, I need you to go pay
30:12He goes, what?
30:13You need me to pay for it?
30:15You haven't got £2?
30:16I'm like, shut the fuck up
30:17And I was like, oh, don't worry, I've got you, bing
30:20And I was just like the most, the worst
30:23So did she come home with you last night?
30:25No
30:26How much money did you have?
30:27£1.90
30:30On Sunday night, there were more contestants standing about
30:34Ready to show off their specialist knowledge on ITV
30:37Talking about floors
30:40I got fresh floor in the kitchen
30:42In the extension
30:45And I don't know what kind of floor it is
30:47But it's the best floor ever
30:48I think it's wood
30:54I might do types of colour or something like that
30:56Shades of colour
30:58Yeah, shades of colour
30:59OK
31:00I think it's quite difficult though
31:03So Rob Brydon would show you a colour
31:05And you would say, I know what that is
31:07Yeah, I'd like to see that
31:09OK, let's light up the floor
31:13I'm not a fan of this show
31:15Do you know what it is?
31:16I don't feel like you find it intellectually stimulating enough
31:18However, for me, perfect level
31:22Oh!
31:24It's finally happened
31:26Maybe it is quite exciting when someone lights up your box
31:29You what?
31:30Let's see what the choices are, Gemma
31:33They are Mackenzie with sports teams
31:35Birds
31:36And we've got anatomy
31:39What the fuck's anatomy?
31:41Oh, that's your private part
31:42Hugh was telling his teachers about the anatomies the other day
31:45I'm going to try and spread my wings, I think
31:47Yeah?
31:48Ooh, that'll be birds
31:50I like birds, but I wouldn't know them
31:52Yeah
31:52I'd know a robin
31:57Owl!
31:57Barn owl
31:58Tawny owl
31:58Tawny
32:00That's a flamingo
32:01Flamingo
32:01I really want to see a flamingo once in my life
32:03You've never seen a flamingo?
32:05No!
32:06Fucking hell, I have bigger dreams, mate
32:10Ibis
32:10Ibis
32:11Oh
32:12Crane
32:12Stork
32:13Stork
32:14Ooh, good shout, darling
32:16Oh, no!
32:17I got it!
32:18Yes!
32:19Blue tit
32:20I wonder why they call it a blue tit
32:22It's blue, innit?
32:23It's tits of yellow
32:25Yeah
32:27Cock
32:30I got woken up by a cock this morning
32:31Not the sort of cock I might like
32:33But the cock in the garden
32:34You do, you do, haven't you?
32:37Woodpecker, woodpecker, woodpecker
32:39Woodpecker, woodpecker
32:40Hummingbird!
32:42That's the Jamaican national bird
32:43Do you remember the hummingbird we had in the garden here?
32:45It wasn't a hummingbird, darling
32:46It turned out to be a moth
32:47It was a moth
32:47Oh, them hummingbirds are beautiful
32:49Pigeon!
32:52Cuckoo!
32:53It's a fancy pigeon
32:54A mirror!
32:56Pass
32:57It was a cuckoo out of the bloody hell
32:59Did you know that were a cuckoo?
33:01That's why
33:05Um...
33:05Goose!
33:06Barrowhawk
33:07Sparrowhawk?
33:08It's a fucking goose
33:09Goose, goose, goose
33:11Goose?
33:12Stork
33:13Goose
33:14Goose
33:14Er, herring
33:16Is this woman blind?
33:18It's a fucking goose
33:20She's never beat the park before
33:22Turkey
33:23Look at that gizzard
33:24I know, I'm just looking at it, Jen
33:26What are you saying?
33:28It's funny to see a turkey in real life
33:30Other than just as a white corpse on Christmas Day
33:33Yes
33:34What the fuck's that?
33:36Kiwi
33:37Kiwi?
33:37Oh, that's a kiwi
33:38We don't see many of these around, do we?
33:41What?
33:42Birds
33:42Like these
33:44Well, you won't see kiwis
33:45They're native to bloody New Zealand
33:47Aye, well, half of them
33:49I don't know half of them
33:50I've never seen them flying round
33:52Well, you won't see bloody chocans
33:54Some parakeets flying round Kaffili
33:58Well done, honey
34:00Well done
34:02You did so well
34:03Michelle, it's a good job you had Gemma on your team
34:06To be honest
34:07She's not on our team
34:08At all
34:09That's what we're having to eat tonight, Natty
34:12Partridge
34:12Are we?
34:13They've been frozen
34:16Unfrozen
34:17They've had three hours in the car
34:19And we're eating them tonight, Mary
34:21What's the chance of us not getting food poisoning?
34:24Well, it won't matter
34:25It'd be good for us to be ill
34:34In the Cotswolds
34:36Oh my God
34:37The tanning shop just wished me a happy Valentine's Day
34:40Well, I bet they did, darling
34:41Because you probably kept them going for the last five years
34:43You know, I don't go in there that much
34:44Andrew and his husband Alfie
34:47Well, I went in yesterday
34:48Last time I'd been in was 2013
34:51I think they were steam-driven then
34:54Well, you're positively glowing
34:55I know
34:56Absolutely
34:57Honey-bronzed and very desirable
35:01This week
35:02It was a tense thriller set in the finance department
35:05That had us gripped on Prime Video
35:08It's so nice for us to be able
35:10In 2026 to sit down
35:12And watch a drama
35:14During these awful weeks of weather
35:17Just think a hundred years ago
35:19There would have been nothing to watch
35:22And we would have been
35:23Well, we'd have been huddling on the ground
35:25With livestock, Mary
35:29Animals
35:31Which is what I'm still doing
35:33Hmm
35:34Stop going for my hula hoops
35:37No
35:38Those are yours
35:39No
35:40Those are joint
35:42That's me
35:45Oh, yeah, this is steel
35:46Sophie Turner, isn't this
35:48From Game of Thrones
35:49Ooh, Sansa
35:52Are we in London?
35:53We're going to London, aren't we, in April?
35:55Yeah, we are
35:58Myrtle
35:58Oh, I'm so sorry
36:00Is this Myrtle's first date?
36:02Were you on Game of Thrones?
36:09Are these inspectors, do you think?
36:11Look at the faces on them
36:13Everyone's storming into the office
36:14Cos Prat-a-Manger has run out of overnight oats
36:21Well, I don't like that ginger one
36:23He's scary
36:23They all look scary, don't they?
36:26It's like a crackhead McCuckler
36:27Have they all got prosthetics on?
36:30Cos they all just look a little bit funky, don't they?
36:34Oh, what's that all about?
36:38Oh, wow
36:40Guns, yeah?
36:41What are they doing?
36:42You're not allowed guns in a workplace
36:44Everybody listening here right fucking now!
36:47Oh, my fucking God
36:48This has been my worst nightmare, this
36:50Up, you, heads!
36:52Ladies and gentlemen, if you do exactly what I say
36:54When I say it, you won't get hurt
36:55Right, well, what do we need to do? Tell me
36:57I think if it were me, I'd pretend to be dead already
37:00I'd just lie on the ground
37:02If you don't hear what I say
37:03When I say it, you will be shot
37:04Sometimes I struggle to listen
37:06So what if I heard it wrong? I'd be dead
37:08I'd just follow what everyone else is doing
37:10It wasn't long before it became clear what the baddies were after
37:15This
37:16It's got the details of six trades on it
37:18Source accounts, destination accounts, sizes
37:20And what, he's going to force him to make trades?
37:22Yeah
37:22I want you to load them all up into the trading system
37:27So no, that won't work
37:28It won't work? Why won't it work?
37:30I don't know
37:31Just load up the trades
37:32Oh, don't be clever about it
37:34Oh, please
37:34He knows what he's on about
37:35This is over £4 billion
37:37Over £4 billion?
37:40OK, this is not a small heist
37:42No
37:43These are people's pensions
37:45This is social workers, police, doctors
37:48They don't have the trades
37:49He's not bothered
37:50Just do it, the guy's not doing the gun
37:52You horrible man
37:53I'd like to punch you in the face
37:56And take your stupid mask off
37:57OK
38:01That's all done
38:02He's in
38:03OK, that should be with you in 24 to 48 hours
38:06Trades have been sent to the custodian bank
38:09Yeah, but
38:09They'll know that we've never sent money to those accounts before
38:12So they're going to call and ask what's going on
38:13Yeah, you'll be here to tell them
38:15Yeah, I mean, somebody's going to
38:17Flag this
38:18Smell of a rat in this
38:22Oh, my days
38:26Someone answer it, please
38:28Luke, answer it, please
38:32What she's doing
38:33Um, Lockmail Capital
38:35How can I help?
38:36Good girl
38:37Sorry, uh, Zara?
38:38Zara
38:39Speaking
38:40He knows her
38:40Um, I've just got the trades you guys sent through
38:44I've never seen these accounts before
38:46What's she going to say?
38:47If they don't go through ASAP
38:49I'm going to be in some
38:51Serious shit
38:52So if you could please
38:53Just put them through
38:54As soon as you put the phone down
38:56Please
38:56Yeah, Luke's going to have a bullet in his temple
38:59I'll put them through today
39:01Oh, my days
39:01Wow
39:02But will she live
39:03Or will she be shot dead now
39:05By that horrid man?
39:13Oh, my days
39:13What is he reaching for?
39:15What are you doing?
39:15Don't be a hero
39:16Uh, hey
39:19Hey
39:20Hey
39:20Shh
39:21Don't call me
39:22Yeah
39:23We can signal
39:24Oh, my God
39:26I'd ignore him, mate
39:27I won't
39:28I'd say, shut up
39:29I'd say, shut up
39:30Fuck off
39:30Fucking superman
39:40Who will see him?
39:41Who's going to see you?
39:47You call
39:50Fingers
39:50Nine, nine, nine
39:52Oh, yeah
39:52That's clever
39:53Telephone
39:54Ten, ten, ten
39:55No, fucking nine, nine, nine
39:57You silly bastard
39:58Oh, I thought it was
39:59I don't want him to be shot dead
40:05He's quite good looking
40:09Oh
40:10Oh, my God
40:12Oh, Jesus Christ
40:15Nobody move
40:18Who's going to pay for this mac?
40:21Oh
40:21Get back to the window
40:23And an ambulance
40:26Ambulance
40:28Money's been transferred
40:29Block and leave
40:31Now
40:31Money's in
40:32Oh, let's go
40:37They've got away with it
40:39The cart, though
40:40Oh, no, please don't kill anybody
40:46I hate they got out
40:53Oh, the relief
40:55Someone must have told them
40:56So you think it's one of us?
40:58Makes sense, right?
40:58I mean, how else could they do it?
41:00They did know it all, didn't they?
41:01Yeah, to be fair, yeah, they did
41:02An inside job, but who is it?
41:04You need to figure out who the inside man was
41:06Yeah, whoever turns up tomorrow in a Ferrari
41:07Whoever turns up in a Ferrari tomorrow
41:16Oh
41:18No, surely not
41:23Sarah
41:25God, I've heard about nicking a pencil or a rubber from work, but fucking hell, not £4 billion
41:30No
41:30That is crazy
41:31They've just got away with £4 billion
41:34I know, they'll be able to go for a five, guys
41:36Well, they won't get any bloody checks
41:41In all
41:42Hey, Jenny, you know, with the weather
41:44I mean, have you seen this brought?
41:46Lee, please don't put that up in here
41:47I'm not going to
41:48Why?
41:48It's unlucky
41:48It's unlucky, don't you?
41:50It changes colour
41:52What, when it's raining?
41:53Yeah
41:53Best friends Jenny and Lee
41:55Oh, hang on a minute
41:58Oh, hang on a minute
42:01What are you doing?
42:03I'm getting wet
42:03You just said, don't put it up in the house
42:05Get off
42:06Oh
42:07Where is it going?
42:09Look
42:09Look at the colour
42:11Hang on
42:12How can I look at the colour?
42:13I'm getting pissing wet through
42:17On Friday, ITV had something for the weekend for us
42:25That's monsoon-like, isn't it?
42:26I've been running around like a knobhead this morning
42:28I've been to go and pick Ben's birthday cake up that I've had made
42:32And then I've gone to get my eyelashes done
42:34It's all go
42:35When are they finishing them off?
42:41Hello
42:41Love is in the air
42:42Oh, yeah
42:43Yes, it is
42:44Nice
42:44Love is in the air
42:45Hey, it's Valentine's Day tomorrow
42:47I don't know what's got into Nat lately
42:49Bottle of perfume for Valentine's Day
42:52Wants to take me out for a meal
42:54Said I deserve a treat
42:55What's he after?
42:57Baby number two
42:58You wish
42:59If you're planning a Valentine's night in tomorrow
43:02Then you're sensible
43:04Not being ripped off by a restaurant
43:06Yeah, sat in a room full of balloons and roses
43:08And John Turow's back to help you cook a restaurant-quality meal at home
43:12John Turow
43:13We're glad to see he's washed up on this morning, Nutty
43:15Oh, he looks so pleased to be there, John T
43:18Oh, it's got to be steak
43:20I can just smell it
43:21Oh, it's steak
43:22Oh, yeah
43:22Oh, yeah
43:23Oh, yeah
43:24So I'm just going to do this and then we'll talk about the steak and what we've done with it
43:27and how it works
43:27So a nice hot pan
43:29Yep
43:29Always a hot pan
43:30What we've got here is we've got a thick-cut sirloin which is now available in supermarkets
43:34Yes
43:34Oh, he's got a second steak here for dessert
43:37For me, this is enough for two, actually three, maybe even four people
43:40Four people?
43:42You're having a laugh
43:43John has no right to be in a kitchen if he's going to be talking filthy like that
43:47Like, that's going to do four people
43:49So what we want to do is just take that steak and just cut into that there and you cut
43:53all the way in
43:54How do you do that?
43:54I do that
43:55That is news to me
43:57This is what it was worth getting up for this morning
43:59And what that does is that the fat that's there and that little bit of connective tissue shrinks
44:03But it means the meat doesn't shrink
44:05Oh, you wouldn't want your meat shrinking, what, yeah
44:07No
44:09Oil the meat, never the pan
44:11God, I'll have to take tool statin when I've eaten that
44:14You want enough oil just for it to cook
44:17But you don't want too much oil that it's going to sort of braise in that
44:21Yeah, oh, no
44:22I like my meat oiled
44:28Now, I sometimes put pepper on it
44:30Pepper burns
44:30Some people say the pepper burns
44:33Look at you
44:35Gordon Ramsay
44:36I'm not just a pretty face
44:37So you know what, I'm going to put a little pepper on
44:39And here we go, guys, do your best at cagging me down
44:42Chuck the pepper on
44:44John's up more animated these days, isn't he?
44:47Yeah
44:48I think Greg was holding him back
44:49Turn it over and look at the colour of that already
44:52Oh my goodness
44:53Oh, that, look at that
44:55Look, it's burnt
44:56Look, we're going to make Valentine's Day as easy as possible
44:59Yeah, you want an easy life
45:00You know what, that's so true
45:01Yeah
45:01We've got lovin' to do here, do you know what I mean?
45:04Valentine's Day
45:04Into the oven we go
45:06Going to give that
45:06Too much lovin' after that
45:07All right, damn it
45:08You cook me a steak like that
45:10You have all the lovin' you want
45:11Of course
45:11I like lovin' before the steak
45:13Oh, he likes to shack before a meal
45:15Oh, I must admit
45:16I don't mean shack
45:17Oh, I don't want to know
45:18Oh, la, la, fucking hell
45:20I don't want to know what you're going to do
45:22No, as I just said, once I've eaten
45:23All I want to do is sit and chill
45:25We're going to add to that little bit of butter
45:27Smells incredible
45:28A little bit of rosemary
45:29I ain't got time for putting the plants in it
45:31Rosemary in it
45:32I'm just going to pick that steak up
45:34And let it go underneath there
45:35Oh, I like that
45:37Yes
45:37What are you doing there, John?
45:39Medium rare sort of thing?
45:40Medium rare, yeah
45:41And it'll continue to cook
45:42Yeah, it looks a bit crispy
45:44Gosh
45:45I think that steak
45:46That steak is going to be like land of leather, isn't it, Mary?
45:49We've got chips
45:51We've got dessert
45:53Oh, it's good
45:54In you go
45:54A bit overdone for me, then
45:56Yeah, I reckon that's cooked to buggery
45:58Well overdone
45:59I didn't realise I didn't know how to cook
46:01A steak
46:02Put it in a frying pan with some butter
46:04Flip it over
46:05Flip it over
46:06Flip it over
46:07Your chips
46:07Just toss a load of cheese and chillies in them
46:10And then just slap them in the oven
46:12You know
46:13Every day's a school day
46:15Thanks, John
46:15That is why you're not the host of Astroship
46:18And neither is he
46:20Anymore
46:25A Mersey Derby in the FA Cup fifth round
46:28Full live coverage Sunday afternoon from four o'clock
46:32And brand new factual drama
46:34Dirty Business uncovers the sick truth behind Britain's sewage scandal
46:38Beginning this Monday evening at nine here on Channel 4
46:41Well up next, Bridget Christie's joining The Last Leg
46:44A Mersey Derby in the FA Cup fifth round
46:49Perfect, perfect world
46:51Perfect, perfect world
46:51Perfect, perfect world
46:51Perfect, perfect world
46:51Perfect, perfect world
46:51Perfect, perfect world
46:53Perfect, perfect world
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