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00:00MUSIC
00:21Thank you very much indeed.
00:23Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong and a very warm welcome to Pointless,
00:26the quiz that puts obscure knowledge to the test.
00:28Let's meet today's players.
00:30MUSIC
00:33And couple number one.
00:35Hi, I'm Bruce and this is my wife, Steph,
00:37and we're from Brighouse in West Yorkshire.
00:39Couple number two.
00:40Hi, I'm Finn, I'm from Slough,
00:42and this is my friend, Abby, and she's from Northumberland.
00:44Couple number three.
00:45Hi, my name's Seamus, this is my wife, Sandra,
00:47and we're from beautiful County Antrim in Northern Ireland.
00:49And finally, couple number four.
00:51Hi, I'm Louis, this is my friend Ella,
00:53I'm from London and she's from Birmingham.
00:55And these are today's contestants.
00:57There we are.
00:57Thank you very, very much indeed, everybody.
00:59A very warm welcome to Pointless.
01:01It's lovely to have you here.
01:02That just leaves one more person for me to introduce.
01:04An actor whose TV breakthrough came playing Sue Townsend's Adrian Mole.
01:09Here to continue his latest role of quiz show host aged 55 3 quarters,
01:13it's my pointless friend, it's Stephen Mangan.
01:15Hello.
01:17Stephen.
01:17Hello.
01:18Well, oh.
01:18You could have taken ten years off my age.
01:20I could have done.
01:21You aren't 55 3 quarters.
01:23No, I'm not.
01:23You never are.
01:24I am.
01:26Seriously.
01:27Yeah.
01:27Gosh, you carry it well.
01:28Do I?
01:29Look at you.
01:29Let's not do the quiz, let's talk about how I look for a while.
01:31Still well preserved.
01:32Don't you think?
01:33Thank you very much.
01:33Look at that fine figure of a man.
01:34I'm delighted to be back.
01:36It's great to have you back.
01:36I love doing this show and I get very annoyed when I switch on the telly
01:38and someone else is in this seat.
01:40Oh.
01:40Just to spare my feelings, don't do the show without me sitting here.
01:44OK.
01:45If that means you have to do five shows a year, so be it.
01:48I'll certainly look into that.
01:49All right.
01:49I like it.
01:50I like it a lot.
01:52Thank you very much.
01:52Now, Theo and Sammy won the jackpot last time, unsurprisingly,
01:56so today's jackpot starts off back at £1,000.
01:59There we are.
02:00Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.
02:05APPLAUSE
02:07Well, it is customary that at the end of each round
02:09we will eliminate the pair with the highest score,
02:11so that will be happening as per usual.
02:13So keep your scores as low as you possibly can
02:15and everything I reckon should be terrific.
02:17Best of luck to everybody.
02:18Our first category today is...
02:22Food and drink.
02:23Look at that.
02:24Can you all decide in your pairs?
02:25Who's going to go first?
02:26Who's going to go second?
02:27And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.
02:32And the question concerns...
02:36Steve?
02:39Yes.
02:39On each board, we're going to show you nine pictures
02:42of popular ingredients used as vegan food and drink substitutes.
02:47We will also give you alternate letters of their names.
02:51Please tell us the most obscure.
02:54OK, so can you identify these foodstuffs?
02:57Here is our first board of clues, and here they are.
03:01We have J-C-F-U-T, S-I-A, A-M-N-S, C-I-K-E-S, T
03:10-F, C-I-S-E-S, A-A-E-S-R-P, C-C-N-T and A-B-R
03:19-I-E.
03:21Steph?
03:22You've never had a break from podium one.
03:23No, I haven't.
03:24I can't believe it.
03:25Where's the justice in that?
03:27Tell us more about yourself, Steph.
03:29Well, we love to travel, and many, many years ago, we got married in Sri Lanka.
03:34Did you?
03:35Yeah.
03:35Whereabouts in Sri Lanka?
03:37On the beach in Nagumbo.
03:39Oh, how absolutely beautiful.
03:42And then we had a mini honeymoon up in the mountains in Norelia.
03:47Absolutely heavenly.
03:48It was.
03:48And have you been back since?
03:50No, we haven't.
03:51Oh, you must?
03:51No, I know we must, yeah.
03:53It's just the most heavenly place.
03:55I took the family there earlier this year, in fact.
03:56Yeah, it is.
03:57It's so beautiful.
03:58Yeah.
03:59Beautiful, beautiful place.
04:00Steph, how are you feeling about our vegan substitute foods?
04:03I know a few, but I will go for jackfruit.
04:08Jackfruit.
04:09Grows in abundance in Sri Lanka, in fact.
04:11Yep.
04:11Jackfruit.
04:11Should we see how many of our 100 said?
04:13Jackfruit.
04:16Jackfruit is right.
04:19Down it goes to 52.
04:20That's all right.
04:21They're probably all high score, in fact.
04:23Solid stuff.
04:24Yes, jackfruit.
04:25Congratulations.
04:26It's said to be the largest tree fruit in the world.
04:29I can believe it.
04:30One jackfruit can weigh up to 100 pounds.
04:33There we are.
04:33Thank you very much indeed, Stephen.
04:36Finn, tell us more about yourself.
04:38Yeah, well, I usually keep it a bit of a secret,
04:40so I'm going to see it on TV, but I'm, like, quite a nerd.
04:43Like, I really like a lot of video games
04:44and a lot of kids' ones that I'm still into
04:46from when I was younger.
04:47My favourites at the moment are Bayonetta.
04:50Amazing game.
04:51Bayonetta.
04:51Yeah, very good.
04:52And I will always be a massive Pokemon fan.
04:55Forever.
04:56That is amazing.
04:57It is out now.
04:57There we are.
04:58You've shared that with the nation.
05:00There'll be no more hiding from that.
05:02No going back from that.
05:03Amazing.
05:04Yeah, and have you got a lot of Pokemon cards
05:06in a shoebox somewhere?
05:07Somewhere.
05:08I had a massive collection when I was in primary school.
05:10My mum's definitely put them somewhere
05:12or given them to somebody.
05:13She's probably put them somewhere,
05:14and then the bin men will duly have taken them.
05:17Yes.
05:18Don't want to think about it.
05:19I don't want to think about where they are now.
05:19No, don't think about that.
05:20Think about these.
05:21The vegan substitutes.
05:22What are you going to go for?
05:24OK, I do recognise a lot of these.
05:26I think I'm going to go for agave syrup.
05:29Agave syrup.
05:29Shall we see how many of our 100 said agave syrup?
05:35Agave syrup is right.
05:3652 is the only school we have at the moment.
05:37And you pass it.
05:40Oh, this is very good indeed, Finn.
05:41Look at that.
05:4212 for agave syrup.
05:46Yeah, this is one of those words I never know how to say.
05:48No.
05:49Agave.
05:50Agave.
05:51Agave.
05:51Agave, I'm told.
05:53Agave.
05:53OK.
05:54Just call it syrup.
05:56I'll do that.
05:57Problem solved.
05:58Thank you very much indeed.
05:59Now, Seamus, welcome to Pointless.
06:00And from County Antrim.
06:02How lovely.
06:02Tell us all about yourself.
06:03Hi.
06:03My name's Seamus, as I've said.
06:05I'm 57 years old, Xander.
06:07And I've worked in education for 35 years.
06:10But have just very recently semi-retired to pursue a new career.
06:14And what's the new career?
06:16Well, ridiculously at my age, I'm now back at college and I'm training to be a tour guide.
06:20See, that's fun.
06:22OK.
06:22Where will you do your tourings?
06:23Well, initially probably in my own home city of Belfast.
06:27Lovely.
06:28But yes, eventually I would like to think that it'll be sort of across the whole island of
06:31Ireland.
06:32That would be terrific, wouldn't it?
06:33And think how much you'll learn as well.
06:35It's absolutely the case already.
06:37Not just about the sights, but about all the people as well that you're going to meet.
06:40Seamus, what are you going to go for?
06:42OK.
06:43I think I'll probably go for Kia Seeds.
06:46Kia Seeds, Chaya Seeds, Chia Seeds.
06:49We'll find out how you're meant to pronounce it.
06:50But yeah, I know what you mean.
07:00That goes down to 14.
07:01Very well done indeed, Seamus.
07:03Well done, Seamus.
07:04Yeah.
07:04Chia.
07:06How do you pronounce that?
07:07I don't know.
07:08I would say either Kia or Chia.
07:10Yeah.
07:10But it's a member of the mint family.
07:12No.
07:13Yeah.
07:14I suppose that's just the seed.
07:15We can't judge it.
07:15We don't know what it grows into.
07:16You can't judge it from the rest of it, no.
07:17Maybe it grows into something very like mint.
07:19Don't judge a plant by its seeds, as the famous saying goes.
07:23You're right.
07:24Thank you very much indeed.
07:25Now, Louis, welcome to Pointless.
07:27It's terrific to have you here.
07:28Tell us all about yourself.
07:29Oh, hi.
07:30I'm Louis and I'm doing my Masters in Medieval History at the moment at Cambridge.
07:34What's your particular period within Medieval History?
07:37I kind of specialise in waste management in late medieval Peterborough.
07:40That is just superb.
07:42Which is basically Gardie Lou, whoosh, and out it goes.
07:46Well, that's kind of a big misconception, actually.
07:48I won't go to rant, but there were lots of laws about not having poo in the streets and stuff
07:53like that.
07:53That's extraordinary.
07:54So, I mean, there were sort of channels and runnels and things like that?
07:56Yeah, there were sort of latrine pits.
07:58Yeah.
07:58People ordered to, like, collect poo in carts and stuff like that.
08:01And was this...
08:01Maybe this was just in Peterborough?
08:03I've yet to find out.
08:04I think this was more of a national thing that happened.
08:06OK.
08:06But this is fascinating.
08:07I suppose the problem really came when people tried to have some kind of sanitary system within their houses.
08:14Yes, something like that.
08:15That was cesspits in the cellars and things like that.
08:17Very good.
08:18Louis, you're the last person to have this board.
08:20Would you like to talk us through all these vegan substitutes?
08:23Yeah, I recognise, I think, five of them.
08:26So, I've seen chickpeas, almonds, tofu, coconut and aubergine.
08:31I think I'm going to go with chickpeas.
08:33Chickpeas, says Louis.
08:34Shall we see how many of our 100 said chickpeas?
08:39Chickpeas is right.
08:40Well, 52 is our high score, 12 is our low.
08:42You passed the high.
08:4342 for chickpeas.
08:45APPLAUSE
08:47Yes, of the ones you knew, that was the best one to go for.
08:50So, well done.
08:51Smart move.
08:52So, rest of the board.
08:54You were right about almonds.
08:55And almonds scored 61.
08:57In the middle there, we have...
08:59Tofu.
09:00Tofu, 54.
09:02Coconut.
09:03That would have been 62 points.
09:05And probably more popular these days is an emoji.
09:09The aubergine, which would have got you 59 points.
09:12Spira.
09:13Spiral.
09:14Spiral?
09:15No, 90 is spiral.
09:16More the hot place downstairs.
09:19Who runs the underworld?
09:21Satan.
09:22Satan, yeah.
09:23Satan.
09:24Wow.
09:25It would have been two points.
09:27Good.
09:27Thank you very much indeed, Stephen.
09:28We're halfway through the round.
09:29Let's have a look at those scores.
09:3112.
09:31Look at that, Finn.
09:32Very well done indeed.
09:33A good shrug as well.
09:3414 is where we find Seamus and Sandra.
09:3642 is where we find Louis and Ella.
09:38And 52 is where we find Steph and Bruce.
09:40Now, Bruce, we've got to hope you know a sort of Satan-like answer.
09:45We'll see what happens.
09:46Anyway, very, very best of luck with it.
09:47We're going to come back down the line now while the second players.
09:49Please step up to the podium.
09:54OK, here are nine more pictures of ingredients used as vegan substitutes.
09:57Up on the board.
09:58Here they come.
10:21There we are. Ella, welcome to Pointless.
10:23Great to have you with us.
10:24Tell us all about yourself.
10:26Hey, so I'm currently in my final year studying biological and natural sciences at Cambridge.
10:32Yeah, originally from Birmingham.
10:34And so in your last year.
10:35Yeah.
10:36Do you get a little bit of spare time?
10:37Not much, I would have thought.
10:38Not really.
10:39No.
10:40Not much.
10:41But what do you like to get up to?
10:41What do you dream of doing when the spare time comes?
10:44Well, I fill it all up with music.
10:46Oh, do you?
10:47Yeah.
10:47So I play the trumpet in various different bands, including the University Jazz Orchestra,
10:52which...
10:53Cujo, absolutely.
10:54Sorry, just to pretend that I really know it well.
10:59But, yeah, fantastic.
11:00It's an amazing jazz orchestra, that.
11:02Superb.
11:03Now, Ella, you are on 42.
11:06If you could score nine or less, you'd be straight into round two.
11:10I'm going to go with the bottom right, oyster mushrooms.
11:14Oyster mushrooms, says Ella.
11:16You get a red line.
11:17It's quite low, but no-one else has yet answered, so don't be too put off by that.
11:21Let's see where we end up with oyster mushrooms.
11:25Oyster mushrooms is right.
11:30It's a great answer.
11:31Look at it.
11:31It gets you through as well.
11:33Nine is what it scores.
11:34Taking your book up to 51.
11:35Brilliant.
11:37Oyster mushrooms can help biodegrade plastic bags.
11:42I didn't know that.
11:43Yeah, the plastic has to be vaguely biodegradable.
11:44You can tell the science of this is slightly...
11:48Yeah.
11:49..but you grow the mushrooms and then the plastic biodegrades.
11:52You can also make soup out of them.
11:57Marvellous.
11:57Now, Sandra.
11:58Sandra, welcome.
11:59How lovely to have you here.
12:00Tell us all about yourself.
12:01Well, my name's Sandra.
12:03I'm 56 and I am a midwife.
12:06And I was inspired partly to be a midwife
12:09because my sister went into labour on my wedding day.
12:14Did you become an emergency midwife on that occasion?
12:16Yeah.
12:17I ended up going to the hospital with her in my wedding dress.
12:20Wow.
12:21Heavens above.
12:23So, that was what...
12:24And you thought it was such a joyful event.
12:26Yes.
12:26That you wanted to be present.
12:28In fact, more than present.
12:29You wanted to be a participant.
12:30But what a brilliant thing to have done.
12:32She had to stain my thunder.
12:34That's what sisters do.
12:35Ah, yes.
12:36Indeed.
12:37So, I've been a midwife for 20 years
12:38and I've probably delivered over 500 babies.
12:41Amazing.
12:42Absolutely wonderful.
12:43Good for you, Sandra.
12:44Now then, 14 is your score.
12:46Just to return to pointless for a moment.
12:4837 or less gets you through to round two.
12:51What would you like to go for?
12:53Probably not a great one for me,
12:54but I'm going to go for the middle one, lentils.
12:58Lentils, says Sandra.
13:00Here is your red line.
13:01Let us see if we can get you close to or below that with lentils.
13:07Lentils.
13:08Lentils is right.
13:10It's good, Sandra.
13:1240 is what it scores.
13:13Takes your coat up to 54.
13:15I think you've done enough.
13:16Yeah, lentils are cultivated food.
13:18One of the most ancient cultivated foods used in the Bronze Age.
13:22Wow.
13:23For eating?
13:24For eating?
13:25Yes.
13:25Not for biodegraded plastic bags.
13:27No.
13:27It's just what I checked.
13:28But they've been around a long time, lentils.
13:30Haven't they?
13:31Yeah.
13:31Thank you very much indeed, Stephen.
13:33Now, Abi, welcome back.
13:35Tell us more about yourself, Abi.
13:36Well, when I'm not in uni, I really love music
13:38and I make a lot of, like, playlists and CDs and stuff for my friends
13:42and I'm trying to learn guitar sort of unsuccessfully
13:45because I haven't done it in a while.
13:46How do you find that?
13:47I mean, I find the whole fretwork...
13:49I'm finding it almost impossible.
13:51It's so difficult.
13:52I know, like, three chords of a song and I have not learned any other,
13:55but I can do those three chords really well.
13:57Plenty of people have built careers on less.
14:00Now, listen, you're on 12.
14:01A fabulous low score from Finn in the first pass means 41 or less
14:04gets you straight into round two.
14:06What would you like to go for?
14:07I'm going to take a risk and say Aquafaba.
14:10Aquafaba.
14:11It's so obscure it required a red arrow.
14:14Here is your red line.
14:15Nice and high.
14:16Let's see how many of our 100 said Aquafaba.
14:23Aquafaba is absolutely right.
14:25Gets you through.
14:28Look at that.
14:28Down to six.
14:29Very, very well done indeed.
14:31The best score of the round so far.
14:32Taking your good luck to 18.
14:34What a good answer.
14:36Aquafaba is a pretty new word.
14:38Recently minted aqua water faba bean.
14:42It is the juice that comes out when you cook chickpeas.
14:45Oh, you sell it so well.
14:47Sounds good, doesn't it?
14:48Basically, chickpea runoff.
14:49It's chickpea juice.
14:50And what do you do with that?
14:51You drink it?
14:52You can whip it into a froth.
14:54And then throw it away.
14:56And then clear your drain with it.
14:57No, it's actually a very good substitute.
15:00Yes.
15:00For like whipped eggs and things like that in recipes.
15:03That's brilliant.
15:04Thank you very much indeed.
15:05Now, Bruce, welcome back to Pointless.
15:08You've been a barber for many, many years.
15:10But the shop still goes?
15:11Yes, it does, yeah.
15:12Tell us more though, Bruce.
15:13I want to know more either about the barbering or what you like to get up to these days?
15:16Well, like Steph says, we like to travel a lot.
15:19So we started cruising about 15 years ago.
15:22We've done loads of cruises and just fallen in love with it.
15:26We absolutely adore it.
15:27Are you wishing that you'd perhaps done it before?
15:30Yes.
15:30Yes.
15:31It's one of those things, isn't it?
15:32You always think it's the older generation.
15:34So you wait till you get old and try it and you think, why didn't I do it years ago?
15:38I know.
15:38But that weird thing where you suddenly think, oh, hang on, I am the older generation.
15:41Yeah.
15:42Now, listen, you are on 52, which means if you can score one or less, Bruce,
15:47there's a place for you in round two.
15:50Do you feel like talking us through that board?
15:52Well, there's hazelnuts, maple syrup, cauliflower, oats and cashews
15:56and the one in the middle, I have no idea, but I'm going to have to have a go at
16:00it
16:00because it might be pointless.
16:04Tam-eat.
16:06Tam-eat.
16:07Tam-eat.
16:07Tam-eat.
16:08Tam-eat.
16:09Tam-eat.
16:10Here's your red line.
16:12Is Tam-eat right?
16:17I'm sorry.
16:18I would have paid good money to see that just go down.
16:22Down to zero.
16:23I'm sorry, it's wrong.
16:25It scores you 100 points, takes your total up to 152.
16:28You're absolutely right, you did have to go for that one.
16:31But even getting it right would not have been quite enough.
16:34It's actually tempeh, is what it is, and it's worth four points.
16:39What, is it sweet?
16:41It's actually savoury.
16:42Tempeh.
16:43Yeah.
16:43Actually, now you see it written like that.
16:45I suddenly think, that does ring a bell.
16:46Yeah.
16:47The singer Tiny Tempeh, he said.
16:49That's right.
16:49He doesn't like too much of it.
16:51Just a small portion.
16:52What else do we have?
16:53We have hazelnuts, top left, 61.
16:56Maple syrup, 53.
16:59At nine o'clock, what would you say that is?
17:01Cauliflower.
17:01Cauliflower, yes.
17:0259.
17:03We then have oats, 59.
17:05And at the bottom's under...
17:07It's cashews.
17:08Cashews, 47.
17:09Well done if you've got any of those at home.
17:11Thank you very much indeed, Stephen.
17:12Well, that brings us to the end of our first round.
17:14And it gives me the awful task of announcing that Bruce and Steph
17:18will be leaving us at the end of this round.
17:19And I'm afraid that's the end of the road.
17:21We say a proper, pointless farewell.
17:22Thank you so much for coming to play.
17:24Bruce and Steph.
17:24Brilliant.
17:26For the remaining three pairs, it's now time for round two.
17:33Very well done, everybody.
17:35You all excelled in that round, but no-one more than Abby.
17:38That was just superb.
17:40Very, very strong there.
17:41In fact, Abby and Finn are lowest combined scorers.
17:43So, best of luck to everybody.
17:45Our category for round two today is...
17:48..pop music.
17:49Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,
17:51who's going to go second?
17:53And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.
17:59OK.
17:59And the question concerns...
18:03..UK number one love songs.
18:06Yes.
18:07On each board, we'll show you six songs,
18:09all of which reach number one in the UK charts
18:11and have the word love in the title.
18:14However, we have removed one other word from each title.
18:17We'll also give you the act and the year it first topped the chart.
18:20Thank you very much indeed.
18:23So, we are looking for the words that are missing from these love songs.
18:27Blank love, The Supremes, 1964.
18:30Blank of love, The House Martins, 1986.
18:34Love me for a blank, The Osmonds, 1974.
18:38This Ain't A Love, Blank, Scouting For Girls, 2010.
18:43Under the blank of love, Shawaddy Waddy, 1976.
18:47And I Just Blank To Say I Love You, Stevie Wonder, 1984.
18:53Finn, it's over to you.
18:55What do you make of our board?
18:57I'm going to go with I Just Want To Say I Love You.
19:01OK, I Just Want To Say I Love You, Stevie Wonder.
19:04Shall we see if that is right?
19:05Shall we see how many of our 100 said it?
19:09Finn!
19:10I'm so sorry, Finn.
19:12I'm afraid that's incorrect.
19:14Scores you 100 points.
19:15I'm so sorry.
19:15Bad luck.
19:16We'll give the right answers at the end of the round.
19:18Thank you very much indeed, Steve.
19:19Now, Sandra, what are we thinking?
19:22Well, I'm thinking of going for number two,
19:26which is kind of my era, and it's Caravan of Love.
19:29Caravan of Love, says Sandra.
19:31Shall we see how many of our 100 said Caravan of Love?
19:35Caravan of Love is absolutely right.
19:37100 is our high score.
19:40And you end up down there on 26.
19:42Very well done indeed, Sandra.
19:43Great work.
19:44I'm so tempted to sing this song, but it's a great song, isn't it?
19:47It's a ncapella version of an Isley Brothers tune,
19:50featuring Norman Cook, a.k.a. Fatboy Slim.
19:53Amazing.
19:54Yeah, we are.
19:55Thank you very much indeed.
19:56Now then, Ella.
19:57Ella, by the way, you're the last person to have this board.
19:59You could talk through all of them, if you like.
20:02So, I don't really know any of these.
20:03If I had to guess, I'd say the Scouting for Girls one
20:05is this ain't a love song, but the Stevie Wonder one
20:07is I just called to say I love you.
20:12Here we go.
20:13Let's put it to the test.
20:15Called...
20:16Well, it is right.
20:18It's a popular one.
20:1978.
20:2178, the Called.
20:22Abby knew.
20:23Didn't you, Abby?
20:24Yeah.
20:26Yes, I just called to say I love you.
20:28It won an Oscar.
20:29It was in the film The Woman in Red, a Gene Wilder film.
20:32So, you thought about this ain't a love song.
20:36And that was right.
20:37And that would have scored you 38 points.
20:41I'm lucky about that.
20:41The top one.
20:43Xander, any ideas?
20:44Baby Love.
20:44Baby Love, correct.
20:4542 points.
20:47Then the Osmonds is Love Me For A Reason.
20:4971 points.
20:50Very popular, that one.
20:51Good.
20:51And then Under The Moon Of Love.
20:53Under The Moon Of Love.
20:56Shawadiwadi, 50 points.
20:57There we are.
20:58Thank you very much indeed.
20:59Let's have a little recap of those scores
21:00as we're halfway through the round.
21:0126.
21:02Very well done indeed, Sandra.
21:03The best score of the past.
21:05And then 78, Ella and Louie.
21:08Which means you're not too far ahead there, Finn and Abby.
21:11So, a really lovely low score from you, Abby,
21:13could bring you very much back into the fold.
21:15Good luck with that.
21:15We're going to come back down the line now.
21:17Will the second players please step up to the podium?
21:22OK, let's put six more UK number one songs
21:24that have love in their titles,
21:26but also a missing word in their titles too.
21:29Here they are.
21:29We have...
21:31Can't Blank Me Love, The Beatles, 1964.
21:34Love Don't Blank A Thing, Jennifer Lopez, 2001.
21:38Blank All My Love For You, Whitney Houston, 1985.
21:43Crazy Blank Love, Cheryl Cole featuring Tiny Temper.
21:48I mean, he's all over this show.
21:492014.
21:50Love Is All Blank, Wet Wet Wet, 1994.
21:55And Tell Blank I Love Her, Ricky Valance, 1960.
22:01There we are.
22:01Xander, do you think Cheryl Cole was going to record with Meatloaf
22:04but just decided to go for a vegan substitute?
22:08She probably did.
22:08That you did.
22:09That you did.
22:12Um, Louis, now then, you're on 78,
22:15which means 21 or less gets you into the next round.
22:19I'm not even sure if this is right,
22:20but is it Crazy Stupid Love for Cheryl Cole?
22:23Crazy Stupid Love for Cheryl Cole featuring Tiny Temper.
22:27Here is your red line.
22:31It's there.
22:31Shall we find out if stupid is right?
22:35It is right.
22:39Crazy Stupid Love gets you through as well.
22:42Down it goes to 15.
22:44Taking your total up to 93.
22:47Uh, Cheryl's fourth number one in the UK.
22:51Um, and the last time she called herself Cheryl Cole.
22:54So, uh...
22:54She had another surname after that and then just dropped all surnames.
22:57Just went Cheryl.
22:58Just went Cheryl.
22:59I'm going to go with Stephen from now on.
23:00That's just it.
23:01I think you could do.
23:01Stephen.
23:02You could.
23:02Yeah.
23:03Mangers.
23:05That's what I think of you as.
23:07Mangers.
23:07Mangers.
23:08Yeah.
23:08OK.
23:09There we go.
23:09Mangers maketh man.
23:11Um, now, Seamus, you are on 26.
23:15Uh, 73 or less sees you into the head-to-head.
23:19What are we thinking?
23:20I know a few of them and I'm wondering,
23:22should I just take a small risk?
23:24Go for the bottom one and tell Laura I love her.
23:27Tell Laura I love her, says Seamus.
23:29Um, here is your red line.
23:32Nice and high.
23:33Laura, is that right?
23:36It is Laura.
23:38Very well done indeed, Seamus.
23:42Down to go to 39.
23:43Taking your total up to 65.
23:46Uh, well done and well gambled.
23:49I mean, that's my philosophy on life.
23:51You know, what have you got to lose?
23:53Give it all you've got.
23:54Thank you very much indeed, Stephen.
23:55Abby.
23:56Yep.
23:56Oh, I'm so sorry.
23:58Look at that.
23:59High score.
23:59And I know you're going to have a brilliant low score.
24:01I know.
24:02Um, will you talk us through the board?
24:03I'm afraid you are our high scorers,
24:05even before you give your answers.
24:06Um, well, the top ones can't find me love.
24:08I think the second one's love don't cost a thing.
24:11And then I think maybe save all my love for you.
24:14Love is all around.
24:15But I think I'm going to go for love don't cost a thing.
24:18But I don't actually know if that's right.
24:19Love don't cost a thing.
24:20Well, let's find out if it's right.
24:22Love don't cost a thing.
24:22There's no red line.
24:24Cost.
24:27It does!
24:28I mean, it don't cost a thing.
24:32There we are, 33.
24:34Taking your total up to 133.
24:36That was a great answer.
24:37Uh, yeah, good answer.
24:39From Jennifer Lopez's second studio album.
24:41Talk us through the board, Xander.
24:43What have we got?
24:43Uh, buy.
24:44Yep.
24:44That's 72 points.
24:46Can't buy me love.
24:47Saving.
24:48Saving.
24:49All my love for you.
24:5058 points.
24:51And absolutely, as Abby said, a round.
24:53Yes, the highest scoring of the round.
24:55Love is all around 82 points.
24:57Thank you very much indeed, Stephen.
24:59That brings us to the end of our second round.
25:00It means we have to say goodbye to Abby and Finn.
25:02I'm so sorry.
25:03I thought this had final written all over it.
25:05That first round was just extraordinary.
25:07That's the round you need to take away and remember.
25:09Yeah.
25:10But thank you so much for playing, Abby and Finn.
25:11It's been great to have you here.
25:13For our two remaining pairs,
25:14now time for the head to head.
25:21Congratulations, Sandra and Seamus, Louie and Ella.
25:23You are now one step closer to the final and a chance to play for our jackpot,
25:27which currently stands at £1,000.
25:30But before we play the head to head, we have a chance to throw some more money into that jackpot
25:34by seeing if we can come up with some pointless answers.
25:36So just for fun, let's see if we can find these pointless answers.
25:39We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many fictional UK prime ministers as they could, Stephen.
25:48Yes, you'll see six options.
25:50Four are the names of UK prime ministers from various forms of fiction,
25:54two of which are pointless.
25:55Two are not the names of fictional UK prime ministers at all.
25:59£250 in the jackpot for each pointless answer you find. Good luck.
26:03There we are.
26:04Let's see if we can find the two pointless prime ministers from these six.
26:20Does anybody know anything at all?
26:24No.
26:24Harriet Jones is a prime minister in Doctor Who, but I don't know if that's pointless.
26:30Interesting.
26:31So, Sandra and Seamus, if there's no other wisdom,
26:35would you like to nominate a pointless fictional prime minister?
26:39We're going to go for Maya Motley.
26:41You're going to go for Maya Motley.
26:43Maya Motley, Maya Motley.
26:44Let's see.
26:44Is that a pointless UK prime minister from fiction?
26:48Oh, no.
26:50Bad luck.
26:52Louie and Ella, what would you like to go for?
26:54Harriet Jones.
26:56Harriet Jones.
26:56Shall we go for Harriet Jones?
26:57Let's see if that is a pointless UK fictional prime minister.
27:02Well, as you spotted, definitely a fictitious UK prime minister.
27:08Oh!
27:09Five people knew that.
27:10Darby.
27:11Yes, very good.
27:13Played by in Doctor Who?
27:15Oh, don't ask me.
27:17Penelope Wilton.
27:18Five points.
27:19Very good.
27:19Mia Motley is the real prime minister of Barbados and she became the prime minister in 2018.
27:28Zander, what do you reckon?
27:29Walter Outrage sounds like he should be from Sheridan or something.
27:33Walter Outrage is a fine answer.
27:35It is a pointless answer and it's a prime minister from Vile Bodies by Evelyn Waugh.
27:42There we are.
27:42Splendid.
27:43I think Lord Bellinger feels like a prime minister as well.
27:46Lord Bellinger is a fictitious prime minister.
27:49Absolutely not pointless though.
27:50Not pointless.
27:51Two points.
27:52The Adventure of the Second Stain.
27:54It's a Sherlock Holmes book.
27:56Mmm.
27:56There we are.
27:57He appears.
27:58And let's therefore go for Aruna Mahajan.
28:01There we go.
28:02Yes, that is the other pointless answer.
28:03Well done.
28:04Aruna Mahajan.
28:05The American television series Designated Survivor.
28:08So that just leaves Jim Dale, or James Dale, Jack Nicholson's fictional US president
28:14from the film Mars Attacks.
28:16There we are.
28:17There we go.
28:17Thank you very much indeed.
28:18We didn't find any pointless answers.
28:20Let's play the Head to Head.
28:22APPLAUSE
28:26Now, the first pair to win two questions.
28:28We'll be playing for that jackpot.
28:29And you are now allowed to play as a pair.
28:31So you can confer before you give your answers.
28:32Best of luck to everybody.
28:34Our first question today is all about...
28:37..arts and crafts, Stephen.
28:39We're going to show you five pictures now
28:41of different artistic techniques and crafts.
28:45We have added the initial letter of each word as a clue.
28:49Please give us the name of the art or craft.
28:52Good luck.
28:52There we are. Thank you.
28:54Can you identify these arts and or crafts?
28:56A, E.
29:02B, M.
29:07C, B.
29:13D, O.
29:18And E, D.
29:24There we are.
29:25Sandra and Seamus, you are our low scorers,
29:27so you get to answer first.
29:28Feel free to confer.
29:31OK, I think we're going to go for E,
29:34which we believe is decoupage.
29:36Decoupage.
29:38Decoupage, say Sandra and Seamus.
29:40Now, Louis and Ella,
29:41can you talk us through the rest of that board?
29:43I think A is embroidery and D is origami.
29:49Yeah.
29:49I think maybe D, origami.
29:51You're going to go for D, origami.
29:54So, we have decoupage and origami.
29:58Sandra and Seamus went decoupage for E.
30:00Shall we see how many of our 100 said that?
30:04Decoupage is right.
30:10Down it goes to 19.
30:1119 for decoupage.
30:13Meanwhile, Louis and Ella are going for D
30:16and are saying origami.
30:17Shall we see how many of our 100 said that?
30:22Origami.
30:23It's a high score there.
30:2589.
30:25Very well done indeed, Sandra and Seamus.
30:27After one question, you're up 1-0.
30:29Yes, well done for getting decoupage.
30:30That was the second lowest score.
30:32What does it involve, decoupage?
30:33You're gluing stuff.
30:34You're literally gluing stuff to a surface.
30:36Nice.
30:37Origami was actually the highest scoring answer in the round,
30:40with 89.
30:41Zander, can you finish it off for us?
30:42Well, let's go through.
30:43So, we had embroidery for A,
30:44which I think is absolutely spot on.
30:46That's correct.
30:46Yes, 70 points, that would have been.
30:48I have no idea what these are,
30:49but I think they fit.
30:50Macrami for B.
30:51Macrami is right.
30:53It's knotting.
30:54Rather than weaving or sewing,
30:55you knot the stuff.
30:5641 points, yeah.
30:58And batik for C.
31:00Batik is absolutely right.
31:0216 points.
31:03That was the lowest scoring answer of the round.
31:05You dye fabric,
31:06and you create glorious stuff like this.
31:08Thank you very much indeed.
31:09Well, that brings us to our second question.
31:11Louie and Ella, you get to answer this one first,
31:12but you have to win it to stay in the game,
31:14so best of luck.
31:15Our second question is all about...
31:18Greek mathematicians and scientists, Stephen.
31:21We're going to give you clues to ancient Greek mathematicians
31:24and scientists, as well as alternate letters from their names.
31:29Please give us their names.
31:31Thank you very much indeed.
31:32Here are five clues.
31:35Famed for his theorem relating to right-angled triangles, PTAOA.
31:41Regarded as the founder of the science of logic,
31:44he was taught by Plato and demonstrated that the Earth was spherical.
31:47A-I-T-T-E.
31:49Mathematician known for her contributions to the design of several instruments,
31:53including an astrolabe and a hydrometer, H-P-T-A.
31:58Remembered for his discovery of the causes of eclipses of the sun and moon,
32:02A-A-A-O-A.
32:04And known as the father of geometry,
32:07whose elements is his best-known work, E-C-I.
32:12Louie and Ella, feel free to confer.
32:15OK, I'm not sure if I'm saying this right,
32:19but the third one down is Hypatia.
32:22Hypatia.
32:23Hypatia for the mathematician.
32:24Known for her contributions, etc.
32:26Hypatia.
32:27Now, Sandra and Seamus, can you talk us through the rest of that board?
32:32Not all of it, I'm afraid.
32:33We think the top one is Pythagoras.
32:35The next one is Aristotle.
32:38I think the one that we're going to go for is the bottom one,
32:40which I think might be Euclid.
32:42Euclid.
32:43So, we have Hypatia and Euclid.
32:45Louie and Ella went for Hypatia.
32:47Let's see how many of our 100 said that.
32:52Hypatia is right.
32:55Hypatia is right.
32:57It's a good answer, unsurprisingly.
32:59And down it goes to one.
33:00Very well done indeed.
33:01One for Hypatia.
33:04And meanwhile, Sandra and Seamus are going for Euclid,
33:07the father of geometry.
33:08Let's see how many of our 100 said that.
33:13Euclid is right.
33:17And down it goes to 19.
33:20Very well done indeed.
33:22And it means, Louie and Ella, well done.
33:23You're back in the game after two questions.
33:25It's one all.
33:26Well done.
33:27Hypatia.
33:28But we knew exactly who you meant.
33:30And that's a terrific answer.
33:32And Euclid.
33:33Erzander, I imagine you could polish these off.
33:35Well, luckily, Seamus has done most of the heavy lifting for me.
33:38So, Pythagoras at the top.
33:39That's correct.
33:4039 points.
33:42Then Aristotle, surely.
33:43Must be.
33:43Aristotle, 33.
33:45Shall we put a G in as our second letter on that fourth one?
33:48It's quite an intimidating array of alternate letters.
33:51Isn't it?
33:51I know.
33:51A-A-A-O-A.
33:53Anaxagoras.
33:54Anaxagoras.
33:55And that would have been pointless.
33:56Wow.
33:57Goodness me.
33:57Very well done if you got that at home.
33:59Thank you very much indeed.
34:00Well, here comes the decider.
34:02Whoever wins this third question goes through to the final
34:04and plays for that jackpot.
34:05Best of luck to both pairs.
34:06Our third question is all about...
34:12Stephen.
34:13We're going to show you the names of five airports,
34:16but we've removed any letters that appear in that airport's IATA code.
34:20The three-letter code that is used to distinguish different airports.
34:23For example, you get them on baggage tags.
34:25To help, we have also given you the name of the country
34:27in which each airport is located.
34:30Please tell us the most obscure airport.
34:34Thank you very much indeed.
34:36So, let's reveal our five airports and here they come.
34:38H-E-O, South Korea.
34:42U-C-N-D, New Zealand.
34:46P-A-I-S-L, France.
34:51N-K-U-T, Germany.
34:54And R-O, Egypt.
34:58There we are.
35:00Now, Sandra and Seamus, you will go first.
35:06OK, we think we know a few of them,
35:08but I think we're going to go for the middle one actually as Paris or Lee.
35:14Paris or Lee, say Sandra and Seamus.
35:17Now then, Louis and Ella, can you talk us through the rest of that board?
35:21Second one, Auckland.
35:22Yeah, Auckland.
35:23Frankfurt. Frankfurt, Cairo.
35:25But I think the top one is Incheon.
35:29Incheon.
35:29I trust you.
35:30Incheon.
35:31OK, so we have Paris or Lee versus Incheon.
35:34Now, Sandra and Seamus went for Paris or Lee for the middle one.
35:38Let's see how many of our 100 said Paris or Lee.
35:44Paris or Lee is right.
35:50That's an amazing answer.
35:51Very well done indeed.
35:52Eight for Paris or Lee.
35:55Meanwhile, Louis and Ella have gone for Incheon for the top one,
35:59the South Korean airport.
36:01Let's see how many of our 100 said Incheon.
36:03Yeah, let's see.
36:06It is Incheon.
36:13And it wins it for you.
36:14And it goes to six.
36:15This is brilliant.
36:16I mean, this is proper head-to-head play.
36:19Very well done indeed.
36:20Louis and Ella, after three questions,
36:22you are through to the final 2-1.
36:24Oh, I raised my hats to you.
36:25That was amazing head-to-head play.
36:27Well done.
36:28You did pick the two lowest answers.
36:31That was the only answer on the board,
36:32Incheon, that would have got you through.
36:34The others, Zander?
36:36Yes, Auckland.
36:37Auckland, 62.
36:39Frankfurt, 57.
36:41And Cairo, the highest scorer, 85.
36:44Thank you very much indeed, Steve.
36:46And that brings us to the end of the head-to-head round.
36:47And it means we say goodbye to Sandra and Seamus,
36:50who have played a blinder.
36:51You have been so good.
36:52We'll see you next time.
36:53It's only your first show, for goodness sake.
36:55We'll look forward to that.
36:56Sandra and Seamus.
36:57For Louis and Ella, though,
36:59now time for the Pointless final.
37:04Huge congratulations, Louis and Ella.
37:06You have fought off all the competition,
37:08and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.
37:17You now have a chance to win the Pointless jackpot.
37:19And at the end of today's show,
37:20the jackpot is standing at £1,000.
37:24Well, on the evidence of what we've seen,
37:27I don't think that jackpot stands a chance.
37:29But we'll have to wait and see.
37:30We'll have to see what the categories are.
37:31What would you love them to be?
37:33If you're going to ask me about waste management in Peterborough,
37:35that would be great.
37:36That would just be amazing.
37:37But any medieval history would be nice.
37:39Ella, what would you love to see?
37:41Science questions.
37:42I think I'd probably stand the best chance.
37:43Or music.
37:44Would be great for both of you.
37:45Depends on what music.
37:46There we are.
37:47I know I never got to quiz you about your music, Louis.
37:50What do you play, by the way?
37:51I play the bass guitar and double bass.
37:53Excellent.
37:54Also in Cujo.
37:55Very good indeed.
37:56Right, well, let's see what today's four options are.
38:01Home Grand Slam tennis champions.
38:07I feel like the only one I'll have any idea about is the authors.
38:14Go CC authors, yeah.
38:16CC authors.
38:16Should we go for CC authors then?
38:18We are looking for the title of any book written by Katherine Cookson.
38:23We are including children's books and autobiographies,
38:26but not any books published under a different pen name.
38:30Note that we're looking for the titles of individual books,
38:32which may differ from the titles of single-volume trilogies
38:35or of TV adaptations, et cetera.
38:37That's according to the books page on KatherineCookson.com.
38:41Or we're looking for the title of any fiction book written by Clive Cussler.
38:46This includes books co-written with other authors and his children's books,
38:49but not his non-fiction work.
38:51That's according to the website Cusslerbooks.com.
38:54Very best of luck.
38:56As always, you've got up to one minute to come up with three answers.
38:59All you need to win that jackpot is for just one of those answers to be pointless.
39:02Are you ready?
39:04OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.
39:06There they are.
39:07Your time starts now.
39:10I know neither of these authors.
39:15I mean, they mention children's books, so...
39:16Yeah.
39:17I guess some children's books.
39:19Children's books for whom we don't know the author.
39:21Yeah.
39:22Could be one of...
39:23I guess if we guess book titles which we don't know the author of,
39:26there's more of a chance it could be them.
39:28Exactly.
39:31This is bad.
39:34Um...
39:38Um...
39:39Um, OK.
39:43Um...
39:45The Magic Roundabout is a film.
39:47It could be a children's book, possibly written by one of these.
39:50That's true, yeah.
39:51Um...
39:52It sounds like a name.
39:58Um...
39:58Ten seconds left.
40:01Um...
40:01Two more guesses.
40:05Um...
40:05My brain's blank.
40:06I've got nothing.
40:09OK, that, I'm sorry to say, is your time up.
40:12What can you give me?
40:13Um...
40:13The Magic Roundabout came to mind.
40:15Um, for which of these delightful...?
40:17Oh, I think it was definitely written by Katherine Cookson.
40:19Katherine Cookson's The Magic Roundabout.
40:21The Magic Pet Shop.
40:23The Magic Pet Shop.
40:24Written by Clive Cussler.
40:25Written by Clive Cussler.
40:27The Magic Double Bass.
40:28Also written by Clive Cussler.
40:31And The Magic...
40:31Double Bass.
40:31Of those three, do you want to nominate one to be your best shot at a pointless answer?
40:35I think The Magic Double Bass.
40:36The Magic Double Bass goes last.
40:37And we'll just put The Magic Pet Shop first, shall we?
40:40Um, let's put those answers up on the board in that order.
40:42And here they are.
40:43We have...
40:45The Magic Pet Shop.
40:46The Magic Roundabout.
40:47And The Magic Double Bass.
40:49We've gone for these books.
40:51£1,000 would be yours if you were to win it.
40:53I mean, what would you like to do with £1,000?
40:55I think I'd like to buy a new bass guitar, probably.
40:58Splendid.
40:58I'd buy a flugelhorn.
41:01A flugelhorn.
41:02Very nice indeed.
41:03No-one said that before on Pointless.
41:05That's just superb.
41:06OK, now, um, let's see what happens when we put your first answer to the test.
41:10The Magic Pet Shop for Clive Cussler.
41:15I'm afraid not The Magic Pet Shop.
41:17The Magic Roundabout.
41:19This time, Catherine Cookson.
41:24And finally, The Magic Double Bass.
41:27We're back on Clive Cussler territory here.
41:32I'm sorry.
41:33As I say, you'd have had some brilliant answers on some other subjects, I know.
41:38Absolutely no doubt of that.
41:39But I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot.
41:41But let's put that to one side because you do win today's Pointless Trophy.
41:44And that is terrific and hugely deserved as well.
41:47You've been brilliant.
41:47I'm sorry we've only seen you for one show.
41:49But Louvianella, thank you so much for playing.
41:51Bad luck.
41:52Three valiant guesses.
41:54The Magic Roundabout was based on a French TV series.
41:57And the British version was written by...
41:59Eric Thompson.
42:00Emma Thompson's father.
42:01That's right.
42:02Eric Thompson.
42:02Let's have a look at some pointless answers.
42:05Books by Catherine Cookson.
42:07You could have had The Cinderpath, The Glass Virgin, The Mallon Girl, Tilly Trotter Wed.
42:14Everything was pointless apart from the following titles, which all scored points.
42:18Tilly Trotter, The Mallon Streak, The Gambling Man, The Rag Nymph, Riley Rooney, Bannerman Legacy and The Fifteen Streets.
42:26On to books by Clive Cussler.
42:28Some of the pointless answers you could have had.
42:31Deep Six, Pacific Vortex, Treasure and Valhalla Rising.
42:36You would have got a pointless answer for saying The Chase, but we'd have never stopped booing.
42:43In fact, the only scoring answers here were Raise the Titanic, Sahara, The Kingdom, White Death, Night Probe and Pirate.
42:50Everything else by Mr Cussler was pointless.
42:54Thank you very much indeed, Stephen.
42:55And thank you so much, Louis and Ella.
42:57It's been brilliant having you on the show.
42:58I'm sorry I didn't win our jackpot today.
42:59That will therefore roll over onto the next show when we will be playing for £2,000.
43:07Join us then as if someone can win it.
43:09Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Stephen.
43:10Goodbye.
43:11And it's goodbye from me.
43:12Goodbye.
43:14APPLAUSE
43:41Clivegood
43:41Welcome to our Mireya.
43:41L anchor
43:41As youか
43:42Your
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