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Jupiter Moon is a science fiction soap opera television series first broadcast by British Satellite Broadcasting's Galaxy channel in 1990. 150 episodes were commissioned and made, but only the first 108 were broadcast before the closure of BSB. Episodes 109–150 were first shown in the UK on the Sci Fi Channel in 1996.

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00:01I'm sorry to drag you away from the party.
00:04If it's about the new contraceptive patch, I'm really not interested.
00:06Sit down.
00:08I ran a few tests through Medicom just to be on the safe side.
00:12What is it, my God?
00:14You're pregnant.
00:16You're kidding.
00:41You're pregnant.
00:59I don't see how.
01:00I never meant to get pregnant, not yet.
01:03I've done three tests, Melody.
01:05There's no mistake.
01:09I always intended to have children, but not until I was really old.
01:13You know, when I was too old to go out and have a good time anymore.
01:17This does not have to change anything.
01:20You see, Leah?
01:22Would you like me to book a call to Jean-Francois?
01:24Would you like to talk to him?
01:26No, you really are joking.
01:30Um, I won't go back to the party now.
01:34No, you go and get some rest.
01:37We'll talk tomorrow, okay?
01:40I don't see.
01:44You're not having me on, are you?
01:45I'm sorry.
01:56Ah, bagels.
01:57Rebecca, you're a genius.
01:59Oh, it was nothing.
02:00I must say, the food here's a lot better than I've been told.
02:03Oh, by who?
02:04Oh, I'm no sneak.
02:05But Mercedes did say it was absolute piss.
02:08Um, are you really going to do these EVA classes?
02:12Because you can start today.
02:13Brian said you could use some of the Daedalus equipment.
02:15Yeah, okay.
02:16Second and third years.
02:17Preferably those who know the theory.
02:19EVA 2 and upwards.
02:20Yeah, great.
02:21That's very kind of you.
02:22Oh, no, I'm getting a free trip to the Achilles.
02:25Even now, I turned down the captaincy.
02:27I feel I've got to pull my own weight.
02:30Absolutely.
02:33Come on, you.
02:34You'll be late.
02:35Wasn't it stunning last night?
02:37Did you see the way Daniel was crawling all over Jenny?
02:40Ooh, gruesome.
02:41What do you think about the EVA course?
02:43I suppose I ought to, really.
02:44Might be a good laugh.
02:49You all right, Mel?
02:53Fine.
02:54You don't look all right to me.
02:56Right.
02:57I'm back.
02:58So you are.
02:59I hope you've left a bagel for me.
03:01No, we ate them, actually.
03:02What's this?
03:03Oh, the vector control.
03:04You know, we decided last night to run a check on the vector control.
03:09Oh, sorry, Fimbo.
03:11You weren't there.
03:13Charles and I thought it would be a good idea.
03:15Oh, and did Charles and I decide on anything else?
03:19Like to offer my job to somebody?
03:20No, of course not.
03:22Because Drummond's already turned it down, hasn't he?
03:24I've no idea.
03:25I don't know.
03:25Maybe Charles did want him to do it.
03:27I...
03:29Oh, I'm sorry about the vector control.
03:31No, no, no.
03:32We should be running checks on the malfunctioning altitude control jet on the port engine.
03:36But he could have told me.
03:40Yes, Fimbo.
03:41I am the captain.
03:41Yes, Fimbo.
04:06Hi, who's coming with us to the Achilles, and we're hoping to go outside tomorrow.
04:09If the levels don't get too high, let's go.
04:12I'll talk to you later.
04:13You'll feel much better after a good workout.
04:15Hiya.
04:16Hi.
04:16I always had a workout every morning on the line.
04:17It was the only thing that kept me sane.
04:19Hey, you're putting your names down for the UVA.
04:20I've been thinking about it.
04:2230 minutes aerobic exercise and think of all those lovely endorphins released in your brain.
04:27Endorphins, Melody.
04:28Hormones.
04:30Hormones.
04:31You'll get cardiac dysfunction if you don't work out.
04:33I've already got cardiac dysfunction.
04:39How are you feeling?
04:41Oh, well...
04:42I can see you now if you want.
04:44Please.
04:50You don't want UVA experience.
04:52I don't mind knowing the theory.
04:54I'm just not interested in the practical.
04:56Have you seen this?
04:57The student committee are looking for a new social secretary to arrange activities.
05:00What's the point of the theory if you're not going to go out?
05:03I mean, how can you not be interested?
05:05I cannot be interested in every single thing.
05:08I have encyclopedic non-interests.
05:12You know who they've nominated?
05:14Fiona.
05:15Oh, good idea.
05:16You think so?
05:17Just to have one nominee for social secretary, is that democracy?
05:22Oh, hi, Bulldog.
05:24Hi.
05:25Look, can't stop.
05:27Bulldog?
05:28He's a friend of mine.
05:30Jenny, Victoria thinks we should have one more nominee for social secretary.
05:33I didn't say that.
05:34That's a good idea.
05:35There's too much apathy on this show.
05:36Can I put your name down?
05:38And will you nominate her?
05:39No, I'm sorry.
05:39I'm too busy.
05:40Anyway, I'm not a very social person.
05:42Oh.
05:43Oh, well.
05:44Hey, you're putting your name down for EVA.
05:45Hi.
05:45Hi, Anne.
05:47Any thoughts?
05:50I can't seem to think.
05:52My mind's gone numb.
05:54It has to be your decision.
05:55I can't tell you what to do.
05:57It's a shame.
05:59I haven't got a clue.
06:00Look, no one's pressurizing you to do anything at the moment.
06:03You've got time.
06:04You've got another two weeks before you open it.
06:07Oh, excuse me.
06:08No, no, no.
06:09Come here.
06:10You have to tell Rebecca, but don't worry.
06:11It won't go any further.
06:12What?
06:14I seem to be pregnant.
06:18Go home.
06:19Oh, Melody.
06:21Okay, so, pressure in this space is very low.
06:24Virtually non-existent.
06:26What does that lead to?
06:27Headaches, cramps.
06:28A bit worse than that, sweetheart.
06:30Um, nitrogen in the bloodstream.
06:32The solubility is pressure-dependent.
06:34When the pressure falls, the nitrogen bubbles out of the bloodstream.
06:36Good girl.
06:37And the effect?
06:38Fatal.
06:39Well, not always.
06:40It depends on the nitrogen levels in the blood and how long you've been out there for.
06:44That's why before you ever do an EVA, get stuck into that oxygen.
06:49Right.
06:50First, I'll take two of you out.
06:52Can I go, Boulder?
06:53Can I?
06:53We've all put our names down.
06:55Only people who've done the theory and have EVA too.
06:58Okay, that's you and you.
07:00Me.
07:00Right, back to the theory.
07:02Before we go out, we pre-breathe pure oxygen for 30 minutes minimum.
07:07Anyone who doesn't breathe deep enough or long enough will find nitrogen bubbling out of their veins in a very
07:11painful and unpleasant manner.
07:14Excuse me, Bulldog.
07:16When is the next time, please?
07:18She's 18, but she's under a Space Commission care order until she's 21.
07:22Yeah, that's right.
07:22She's an orphan, isn't she?
07:23Yeah.
07:24We're in loco parentis.
07:25I'm responsible to the Space Commission for her safety and well-being.
07:28How did she get pregnant?
07:29I thought all these girls had contraceptives.
07:31Well, some trouble with her patch, I think.
07:33Like not wearing one?
07:35Christophe thinks we were sent a faulty load in.
07:37It seems he had another patient with similar symptoms, and it turned out to be her patch releasing hormones at
07:42too high a level.
07:42You're telling me that Christophe thinks that the whole ship might be issued with contraceptive patches that don't work?
07:48No, no, I don't think he thinks that.
07:52I'd like to see you here, now, straight away, please, Christophe.
07:56Melody Shaw to Sarah Robbins.
07:58Person to person, please.
07:59Combs to pacify not available.
08:03Deep space observatory in radio shadow.
08:06Combs are unavailable due to magnetic storms in Jupiter's southern hemisphere.
08:12No comms will be available before 0300 hours, even if storms subside.
08:23What is it, Mel?
08:25What's the matter?
08:27Yeah, well, I don't believe she was wearing the patch.
08:29Did she say that?
08:30No, she didn't, but I just don't think that...
08:31One thing we do know, Christophe, is you have administered contraceptive drugs that could make the students ill or allow
08:37them to become pregnant.
08:38I don't think that's true, and listen, this whole thing happened before I came on board.
08:42Would you please do a complete medical on every female student on this ship?
08:47All right.
08:48And perhaps break out new box of patches?
08:49Yeah, yeah, look, I've done that already, okay?
08:51Look, don't create any panic on the ship, Christophe.
08:54I don't want anybody knowing what's been going on.
09:02Is it him or is it me?
09:04You.
09:06Well, you're overworked.
09:07It's been so busy lately.
09:09Well, you better go and have a check-up as well.
09:11What?
09:11Why haven't you got one of Christophe's little patches?
09:17Check the lines and the seals.
09:19Check everything.
09:20Check everything twice, and check again.
09:23And watch out for your buddy.
09:25You won't be going out on your own for some time.
09:27Watch out for your buddy the same way you watch out for yourself.
09:29He's another lifeline.
09:32Listen, I, um, I don't mind waiting, you know.
09:35I mean, some of those others were dead kids.
09:36Come on, Dan.
09:38After all, this is what life in space is all about.
09:42Anna Begali doesn't want me to be social secretary.
09:44You should have seen the look she gave me.
09:46I bet she's next door doing strange rituals with bits of dead chicken.
09:50Have you lost something?
09:53Yeah.
09:54Daniel's going to do an EVA.
09:56You should have seen his face.
09:58I want to come and watch.
09:58Might be a good laugh.
10:00Um, no thanks.
10:02What is it, Mel?
10:06No, I can't tell you.
10:08It's too awful.
10:09Is it men?
10:11Indirectly.
10:12It's John Francois again, isn't it?
10:14Bastard.
10:17Listen, for you, you've got to promise me something.
10:20You've got to promise never to breathe a word of this to anyone, okay?
10:23Yeah.
10:23No one must know ever.
10:24No, no, I promise.
10:27I'm pregnant.
10:33Are you free at five for a check-up?
10:35Me?
10:36Nothing to worry about.
10:37Totally routine.
10:38See you then.
10:39Petra, orbital parameters and slingshot projections, please.
10:43How are you getting on with the students?
10:45There's a woman who tells me she's researching the correlation between necklines, sexual status, and social class background in female
10:53undergraduates in Jupiter's system.
10:55That'll be Jenny.
10:55It's terrifying.
10:57And there's two that I'd like to take out for five minutes a day, but I thought I'd check with
11:01our captain first.
11:04Oh, which two?
11:06Frobich and Wetherby.
11:09Petra, EVA conditions.
11:12Radiation levels are climbing.
11:13This will get higher as we get closer down to Jupiter.
11:16No, no, no, no, no.
11:17Take them out.
11:17We could do with more people with EVA experience.
11:19They have been cleared A1 with Medicom.
11:20They have, Captain.
11:22Oh.
11:22They haven't got grade two mechanics.
11:24They could have mended the side thruster for us while we're out there.
11:26Oh, no, no, no.
11:26We're not bothering with the side thruster.
11:28Yes, we are.
11:29I thought we decided last night no EVA, the side thruster.
11:32No.
11:32Yeah, Charles thought it wasn't worth it.
11:35Dear Frobich, don't be there.
11:54Are you waiting?
11:56You think I'm sitting here waiting for Christmas?
11:58No, Anna.
12:00I'm waiting too.
12:03Good luck.
12:04Thanks.
12:05Hey, Daniel.
12:06What?
12:13The doctor called you down?
12:14Mm.
12:15There's an epidemic.
12:17How do you know?
12:18It's terrible.
12:19He wants to see everybody.
12:21Melody's sick.
12:21It's some sort of space virus.
12:23Melody is not sick, Anna.
12:25So don't go spreading stories.
12:26What's the matter with her then?
12:28And why are we all being examined?
12:29I can't tell you.
12:30Look, Melody's ill.
12:32I know she's ill.
12:32She's not ill.
12:34All right, she's not ill, but I know what I know.
12:36You don't know anything.
12:38Oh, you think that I like it.
12:39Melody is not sick.
12:40Get it?
12:41So what's the matter with her then?
12:43And why are all the women on the ship being called?
12:47Now, just be quiet, Anna.
12:50Don't let your nasty little mind think of anything, right?
12:54Do you think Jean-Francois will marry her?
12:58Next.
13:01My stomach hurts.
13:04Shouldn't have had lunch, you know.
13:05I think lunch was definitely a mistake.
13:06Keep breathing, Daniel.
13:08It's just the first moment when you walk out there.
13:10You know, when you have to walk out.
13:11You're hanging there in the universe.
13:14We've got a line to the ship.
13:16Oh, fine.
13:16That makes everything all right then, I suppose.
13:21Date of last period.
13:23Pardon?
13:24When was your last period, Anna?
13:26Why do you want to know?
13:28I'm your doctor.
13:30Is it true there's an epidemic?
13:32No, it's not true.
13:33Do you have a contraceptive patch?
13:35You think I'm the sort of girl who slips around?
13:38No.
13:38Not like some people, not mentioning any names.
13:40And now look what's happened to her.
13:42You never mind about that, huh?
13:43Anyway, I don't have a contraceptive patch.
13:46No.
13:46Well, good.
13:48Do you have any form of contraceptive?
13:50What do you think?
13:52Start again.
13:54Date of last period.
13:56Look, what kind of a medical is this?
13:58It's not right.
13:59I've been treated as if I can't find nothing.
14:01Well, do something.
14:03They decide things on their own in his room.
14:06And then Mercedes says to me,
14:07Oh, didn't we tell you?
14:09Perhaps if I was sleeping with the professor,
14:10I'd know what was going on.
14:11Well, then tell him.
14:13Tell Professor Brelin you won't stand for it.
14:15Don't let him get away with it.
14:16Yes.
14:17Yes, yes, of course, you're right.
14:18I'll just get these fledglings back in.
14:20Who's that?
14:22What is he doing?
14:24It's Daniel.
14:25He's losing his balance.
14:27What an idiot.
14:28For God's sake, he's only in the airlock.
14:38You're in your face, Daniel, when we fell out of this.
14:40Me!
14:41I loved it!
14:43I want to do it again.
14:44It's good fun, isn't it?
14:45Oh, the best.
14:46Oh, you're saying everything so clearly.
14:48And it makes everything on the ship seem so trivial.
14:50No, I know.
14:50No, you survived then.
14:52How was it?
14:53Oh, wonderful.
14:54Great.
14:55Excuse me, please.
14:56Better than anything.
14:57Better than flying.
14:58Better than sex.
14:59Really, Mr. Wellerby?
15:02And how was it for you?
15:04I could imagine.
15:06Nausea or vomiting?
15:08No.
15:09Hmm.
15:10Frequency of micturition, tenderness of breasts?
15:14No.
15:14What's going on?
15:15What is this?
15:16Just a routine check-up.
15:17You don't normally ask these sort of questions.
15:20First day of last period.
15:22The seventh.
15:24You know me do weight, blood pressure, gas levels, that sort of thing.
15:27Jenny, when did you last receive a new contraceptive patch?
15:32I don't know.
15:33A couple of months ago, I suppose.
15:34It should come up on medical when I need a new one.
15:37Hmm.
15:38Anna says there's an epidemic.
15:40Dick says there's trouble with contraceptive patches.
15:43Which is it?
15:43As far as I know, neither.
15:45So there's nothing to worry about.
15:46There's nothing the matter with my patch.
15:48You can guarantee that?
15:49No, we can't guarantee anything in this life, Jenny.
15:51Oh, come on.
15:52What's happening?
15:53I told you.
15:54Just a routine check-up.
16:06Oh, dear.
16:09Oh, Fimbo.
16:12He's got every woman in the ship going in to see him.
16:14Something must be up, but they won't tell us, are we?
16:17Why not?
16:18Because they think we'd panic.
16:20You're saying that pregnancy is infectious?
16:24Pregnancy?
16:25What do you mean, pregnancy?
16:27I was just thinking, wouldn't it be funny if pregnancy was contagious?
16:32Are you mad?
16:32Love you love.
16:33Anna, you promised.
16:35I didn't say anything to anybody.
16:37I haven't even mentioned her name, okay?
16:38What haven't you said?
16:40Nothing.
16:41Ooh, that pudding looks nice.
16:43I think I might try some.
16:44It's very good.
16:45It's chocolate flavour.
16:46Did I tell you about the food on Island 5?
16:48Mm, lovely.
16:49Somebody's pregnant, aren't they?
16:50Oh, for heaven's sake.
16:51I didn't tell her.
16:53Well, who is it?
16:54Oh, my God.
16:56Fiona.
16:57I'm not pregnant.
17:00Don't shout at me.
17:01I'm not shouting at anybody.
17:03Yeah, yeah.
17:03Drink anybody?
17:05Yeah.
17:05Yes, yes.
17:06Cheers.
17:07All right.
17:07All I'm saying is it's stupid to attempt a slingshot with a faulty sidebuster.
17:12Well, then tell Professor Breland.
17:13I've tried.
17:14He won't listen.
17:15You're the captain.
17:16Just tell him, Fimbo.
17:19Yes.
17:19Yes, I am.
17:20You're right.
17:21Yeah.
17:22I will.
17:23On second thoughts...
17:25This is Fimbo Lewis.
17:26I've decided to reconsider my decision.
17:29We will do an EVA on the altitude control jets at 1,400 hours tomorrow.
17:34There.
17:35There, you see.
17:36Wasn't that difficult, was it?
17:39It's true.
17:40Women who slip around, men never marry them.
17:44We are born into a veil of tears.
17:47A what?
17:48Well, what's she going to do?
17:49She told Jean-Paul Swann.
17:50Nobody knows.
17:51It's a secret.
17:53Well, I won't tell a soul.
17:54Oh, Melody.
17:55Jean-Francois will have to marry her now.
17:58He's engaged to Victoria.
17:59But Melody's having his baby.
18:01Shut up.
18:02Just shut up.
18:04We did it!
18:05Oh, it was wonderful.
18:06We were just talking about the nominations for student social secretary.
18:09You have just got to do an EVA.
18:12Well, it's the only thing in the whole universe.
18:14And when you're out there, you just realise how petty and trivial our lives are.
18:17You come face to face with eternity.
18:19The trouble is, we've only got one nomination for social secretary.
18:22Right, then I'll nominate you, Anna, if you'll stop going on about it.
18:26And I'll second you.
18:27Me?
18:27Oh.
18:28I tell you what, I don't normally talk about religious experiences, right?
18:31He wants me to be social secretary.
18:34Oh, my God, he's flicked.
18:35We've only got...
18:36Look, I've got to do it.
18:37I'll see you later, Anna.
18:39It's amazing, right?
18:40You're sitting there, hanging weightless over the abyss.
18:44I never thought of little me being social secretary.
18:47Not for one minute.
18:48This is such a surprise for me.
18:50Faced with the eternal void.
18:52Oh, somebody push him back into the eternal void, quick.
18:56Get off.
18:57I love you, Jenny.
18:58I've always loved you.
18:59In fact, I love you deeply.
19:00In fact, I love everybody.
19:03Don't worry, Daniel, it won't last.
19:05Everybody.
19:10I'm sorry to have to ask you to do this particularly after what happened, but we haven't got a lot
19:14of choice.
19:14That's all right.
19:15Makes a change from counselling traumatised students.
19:17Drummond's giving his seminar.
19:19Well, I take it he still thinks you shouldn't bother.
19:23He thinks I'm fussing, but it's a question of standards.
19:26Once you let things slide, it's a slippery slope.
19:28Quiet, Flimbo.
19:29You don't think I'm being ever cautious, do you?
19:31No, not at all.
19:32I mean, if we didn't need sideburners, we wouldn't be equipped with sideburners, would we?
19:39I can't tell you how wonderful it was, John.
19:41You have just got to try it.
19:43Not just for the work experience, but it's the most beautiful thing that's ever happened to me.
19:49Apart from you, of course.
19:51Oh, hi.
19:53I was just telling Jean-Francois about the UVA.
19:56Well, I thought perhaps we could have our wedding floating in space.
20:04Oh, I'm so happy.
20:06I wish...
20:07I wish you could have been with me today.
20:11And I wish you were here now.
20:14Oh, I miss you so much.
20:18A veil of tears.
20:22You said I was no woman.
20:24Perhaps he's right.
20:24Perhaps it is a waste of time and effort and money and oxygen.
20:27Finbo, for heaven's sake, forget Brelin.
20:30You're the captain.
20:31Temporary captain.
20:32Look, you've made a decision.
20:33You've got to stick by it.
20:35Think about it.
20:36What if we go whizzing off on our slingshot
20:38and the other sideburners fail at the critical moment, eh?
20:42It's not terribly likely.
20:44Well, stranger things have happened at sea.
20:45What would happen then?
20:47Well, at best, we'd be slung out of the Jovian system on the wrong trajectory.
20:51Well, there you go.
20:52But no chance of finding G33.
20:54Which wouldn't exactly please the professor, would it?
20:57At worst, we'd be plunged into bloody uncertain death
21:00in the heart of Jupiter.
21:01No, you're right, I'm right.
21:02Meet me here tomorrow, 1400 hours with Mercedes.
21:05Mercedes?
21:05She's coming out with me.
21:06Yes, yes.
21:07She's being very supportive at the moment.
21:08I'm beginning to think her bark is worse than her bite.
21:11Well, that's often the case with career women.
21:13Unless she's trying to lull me into a false sense of security,
21:15waiting for me to make a fake letter
21:17so she can step into my shoes.
21:18I doubt it, Finbo.
21:20Yes.
21:21Right.
21:21Well, I'd better get on with some calculations.
21:23We haven't got much time on this.
21:24Another few hours and we'll be into the charged particle belt.
21:27And you won't want to go out in that, will you?
21:35Yes, of course.
21:36But how did you end up here?
21:37I came on the liner like everyone else.
21:39That's not what I meant, Rebecca.
21:40When I look at you,
21:41I don't see somebody who wanted to be a college bursar all her life.
21:44Ah, well, you see, some are born to bursarship,
21:47some achieve bursarship,
21:48and some of us have bursarship thrust upon us.
21:51Hi.
21:52Oh, hi.
21:52Have you finished?
21:53No, but I can't go on seeing them right through the night,
21:56not for routine check-ups.
21:58Is fine listening?
21:59No, you're all right.
22:01And so are all the others I've seen so far.
22:03You know, I have never known students to complain so much.
22:06You think they'd be delighted by all this extra medical care?
22:08Kristoff, if they have been given dangerous medication,
22:11they could sue.
22:13Yeah, and they would.
22:14You know, there's nothing the matter with them,
22:16but they take one look at my face and they want a soup.
22:18Drink, anyone?
22:19Yeah.
22:19No, thanks.
22:20Hey, I heard about that girl getting herself pregnant.
22:23Must make things very difficult for you while up here, eh?
22:27Who told you?
22:28Oh, that fingery girl.
22:30What's her name?
22:31Maria Blanca, is it?
22:32Yeah.
22:32Yeah, and how did Maria Blanca know?
22:34Well, they were all talking about it.
22:36All right, so it's all over the ship.
22:38Oh, what about Victoria?
22:39Was she there?
22:45Victoria.
22:47Oh, I'm sorry.
22:50It's not your fault, is it?
22:54I was so happy today out on the EVA.
22:59Nothing's happened that can't be put right.
23:05It's all gone.
23:08It was like that.
23:11I've lost everything.
23:34It's all gone.
23:39It's all gone.
23:50It's all go out.
23:52It's all go out.
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