00:00Now, let's get to our edition of Craig Ain't Here.
00:04And this is the top five athletes that should retire right now.
00:09And this is a definitive list.
00:10There's no arguing.
00:12Number five is kind of an obvious one.
00:14Travis Kelsey.
00:16Now, you saw yesterday.
00:17He's out there.
00:17You see him there.
00:18He already doubled down on this.
00:21He's never had an argument with his fiance.
00:23That means he's a kept man.
00:25What's the point of being a kept man and having a job?
00:27Okay, if you're going to be a kept man who's not allowed to speak his own mind
00:31and things like that, then get the heck up out of there
00:34and just go and spend their money.
00:36What are you doing taking hits to the head when you're not allowed to have an opinion?
00:40So get the heck up out of there.
00:41Number four, he's wimping and whining.
00:44Oh, I'm not having fun playing football and making millions of dollars.
00:48Joe Burrow, just get out of the sport.
00:51If you can't have fun slinging the football around, then don't do it.
00:55You got enough money.
00:56Go smoke your cigars.
00:58You got a hot young girlfriend.
00:59Start a family.
01:00All right, go start a family, okay?
01:02You know you're not that happy, so move on.
01:05Number three, Patrick Mahomes.
01:08And here's why.
01:09Kelsey's leaving you.
01:11You just tore your LCL for the second time.
01:14Add to go with your ACL.
01:16Andy Reid might be out of there soon.
01:18Now your arena is going to be moved.
01:20You had that steakhouse.
01:22The whole point of your steakhouse was the grift off the fans that are close to the stadium.
01:25Well, now that steakhouse is not going to be near the stadium.
01:28It's not even going to be in the same state as the stadium.
01:31Get out while you can.
01:32You're not going to catch Tom Brady, okay?
01:34You have all the rings.
01:35You have the money.
01:36So the whole point of you doing this was to become the GOAT.
01:39Now it's become an impossibility of you becoming the GOAT.
01:44The best you'll ever be is the second best quarterback.
01:48And you could fall further.
01:50Get out now and you're a legend forever.
01:54Number two, this player already has legendary status despite the fact that he's accomplished nothing.
02:01Shador Sanders should go ahead and retire now.
02:03Think about it.
02:03If Shador walks away right now into the sunset, right, he'll be the greatest what if ever.
02:11And all he has to do when they say why, it'll almost be like a bastardized version of Barry Sanders.
02:18The Lions were so inept.
02:20Barry Sanders at the height of his powers walked away.
02:23Well, you can say, Barry, that's nothing.
02:26That's nothing.
02:26The Browns are so terrible that after being mistreated for one year, I shut it down and went into the media.
02:32Shador Sanders should get out.
02:35And the number one player is the best athlete we've ever seen.
02:39But you saw, he's got an abusive coach.
02:42All right?
02:42He's better than Michael Phelps, better than Carl Lewis, better than Usain Bolt, better than Serena Williams, better than any athlete we've ever seen.
02:50LeBron James should go ahead and retire and just end it, okay?
02:54We don't need to see old LeBron because this version of old LeBron has been great.
02:58So, LeBron James, you need to just move on into the sunset.
03:02And those are the five players that should retire right now.
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