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00:00What do we call the sword?
00:04Thank you for letting us be ourselves
00:06So don't mind me if I repeat myself
00:09These simple lines be good for your health
00:11Keep them crime rhymes on the shelf
00:13Live my life like I just don't care
00:16Five thousand leaders never scared
00:18Ranging noise is the moment they fear
00:21Get up, sell a beautiful idea
00:23Get up, throw your hands in the air
00:25Get up, and shit in the air
00:27Get up, get up
00:29Finish wrapping the presents, sit back on the couch
00:40Then realise you forgot to buy batteries
00:42It's Christmas Eve and it's time for the last leg
00:45Tonight on the show we look at a prediction of Christmas future
00:51Look back on Christmas past
00:53And take a sneaky look at our Christmas presents
00:56Plus we'll be joined by presenter Alison Hammond
00:59Comedian Harry Hill
01:00And music legend Rick Astley
01:02On the show that's always a Christmas diehard
01:06G'day, I'm Adam Hills
01:15Welcome to The Last Leg
01:16The show that wonders if King Charles' speech
01:18Is going to get one less viewer this year
01:19With fears always of the pride of Huddersfield
01:22Alex Brooker and the man who turned on the Christmas lights in Exeter this year
01:26But only in his own house, Josh Whittacombe
01:28Happy Christmas Eve, everybody
01:35Every year we dress up as something ridiculous for Christmas
01:39I, of course, am Tom Hanks from the Polar Express
01:43There you go
01:44Thank you
01:45Yeah, it's not bad
01:47Yeah
01:48You're such a fan of the film that you've called the character Tom Hanks
01:50You look like you're about to strip
01:56That is a different type of Polar Express
02:03I went with Polar Express because it's my favourite Tom Hanks film
02:07Yeah
02:08Actually, it's my second favourite but Philadelphia didn't feel appropriate
02:11Josh
02:14Merry Christmas
02:15Josh, would you like to explain who you're dressed as?
02:18Oh, I didn't get the memo, I didn't know it was a fancy dress
02:20No, I've come as, I'll stand up for this
02:25I've come as Francis Rossi from the Band Aid video
02:29Amazing
02:31I'm not saying I've run out of ideas
02:35But I look like Michael Portillo
02:38I am
02:40You look like someone who's been caught at Heathrow trying to smuggle in illegal reptiles
02:49Well, I've certainly got a snake in these tight trousers
02:55Alex, do you want to explain what's going on there?
02:57Yeah, I'm Tim Allen in the Santa Claus
02:59Santa's just fallen off my roof and I've just put the jacket on
03:02So, yeah, and also, I'll tell you what
03:04It's comfy and neat
03:05I'll tell you what, your snake would be alright in these pyjama bottoms, mate
03:08Honestly
03:09This is the comfiest I've ever been
03:11I'm not going to say you've not gone to much effort
03:12But compared to the two of us
03:14Wearing literally slippers, pyjamas and just you've put on a Santa
03:18Yeah, I know
03:19I think these are comfy slippers
03:21I can only feel the one
03:22But I think
03:25Alright, the big story, of course, is Christmas
03:28It's the story Alex has been most excited about all year
03:33So, let's start with this
03:34Is it okay that Alex interrupted a last leg meeting this year to have his Christmas tree delivered?
03:41Okay, is it okay he did that in October?
03:47Well, here's another is it okay for you
03:49Is it okay that it's a 13-foot tree?
03:52That is...
03:53I know, that's 12 more feet than Alex has
03:59Let's see, here's a photo of it arriving
04:02Just so you know, Alex took the tree out
04:04And then once that was done, Alex's wife put all her belongings in there and there
04:11Here's the photo of the tree once it was up and running
04:15It's so...
04:16Fucking hell
04:17It looks like, you know those North Korean marches where they have the missiles
04:23Honestly, it's so big that's an actual star
04:27Is it a real tree?
04:28It's not a real tree
04:29Oh, no, no, no, no
04:30No, so even your Christmas tree is prosthetic
04:34Look, knowing how much you love Christmas, I would imagine the ads you get on your phone are different to the ads I get on my phone
04:46Oh mate, I mean the algorithm on Instagram
04:49I start getting loads of these like Christmas, like Larry Christmas suits and outfits
04:54Right
04:55Maybe because I was talking about Christmas jumpers
04:57That's all my algorithm, it's just Christmas suits
04:59Yeah, we've got some of the garish images Alex has been getting, check these out
05:02The thing with it is, you two complain a lot, you know, about your disabilities
05:07But that guy in the suit, he hasn't got a head
05:12It looks like...
05:14I'd say that's far away
05:16And the Paralympics, you're in the toughest category
05:20Especially if it's a dead heat in the sprinting
05:22The suit, I love the suit, it looks like the kind of suit Santa would wear to court
05:32You know what I mean? Like if Santa turned up in the Epstein files
05:36Oh no, Santa's not, obviously Santa's not in the Epstein files
05:40Obviously, because we all know Santa makes the list and checks it twice
05:43I reckon, pausing for an edit
05:55I think nothing says Christmas Eve more than Philadelphia and the Epstein files
06:00I reckon if you can encapsulate Alex's algorithm into one image, it would be this
06:07Declan Rice, dressed as Santa, drinking a Frosé with Big John
06:11That is... That's Alex's...
06:14I'm assuming that's your default setting when you blank out during an Easter
06:18Is it true you want a dash cam for Christmas?
06:20Yeah, I do, I genuinely do
06:23I've got banged into dash cam footage
06:26That's the other thing my algorithm is jumping up
06:28What do you mean?
06:30So like, I got really into like, watching these videos
06:32Of like, just people having near misses
06:34But the one I've been getting into most
06:36Is a geezer called Big Jobber
06:38Who basically... What? What? What?
06:40His name's Big Jobber and basically what he does is...
06:42I'm going to say it, Hillsley, when Brooker searched Big Jobber
06:44He wasn't looking for a dash cam footage
06:45He assesses, like, the insurance library
06:52Who's at fault for the crash based on the dash cam footage
06:55Are you okay?
06:57I think I'm having like, the most boring midlife crisis of all time
07:02I really want a dash cam
07:04We've got a very special treat for Alex tonight
07:06So we've been following Santa on his radar tonight
07:09So we're going to check in to see where he is right now
07:11Have a look at this on the map
07:12He...
07:14Now, that seems to be Huddersfield
07:16Which is where you live, Alex
07:17Yeah
07:18He seems to be stuck there
07:20Let's go to Santa's dash cam
07:21Or as he calls it, dash-a-cam
07:23To see what's happening
07:30What arsehole put up a 12-foot tree?
07:33I hope they don't breathalise me
07:35I've had 83 million cherries
07:37Here's your froze machine, you prick
07:40LAUGHTER
07:45Now, one AI generator reimagined Santa over the decades
07:49Showing how, and this is a quote
07:51Beloved figures can evolve alongside society's progress
07:54Here is its revealing timeline of Santas
07:57Let's go through them one by one
07:59Here's 1960 Santa
08:01Textbook
08:02Classic Santa, Coca-Cola Santa
08:03Yep
08:051970s Santa
08:06Ooh
08:08I've...
08:09I'm not letting my kids sit on his knee
08:12LAUGHTER
08:14Let's look at 1980s Santa
08:16Wow
08:18He's been lifting his sack, ain't he?
08:20It's no wonder Mummy was kissing Santa Claus, look at that guy
08:23I mean, that'll leave her Saint Nicholas
08:26LAUGHTER
08:28LAUGHTER
08:31Did somebody just go, oh dear?
08:34LAUGHTER
08:36LAUGHTER
08:38I, I got...
08:40Oh dear
08:42That from me, do you know what, I'm not...
08:45It's ruined Christmas
08:47And that's a guy who was fine with the Epstein joke
08:49LAUGHTER
08:51Uh, 2010s Santa?
08:53Couldn't give a shit, could I?
08:55LAUGHTER
08:572030s?
08:58Well, I tell you what, JK Rowling's not going to be happy
09:01From 2030s...
09:03LAUGHTER
09:05Oh dear
09:07LAUGHTER
09:09Look, there's one in the audience!
09:11LAUGHTER
09:13How did that happen?
09:15APPLAUSE
09:17Mate!
09:19It's the one fucking night you were!
09:22LAUGHTER
09:24I'm not so sure about 2050s Santa
09:26I mean, no, I mean, he looks like he's going to shoot the Naughty Boys again
09:30LAUGHTER
09:32And look, as Santa faces an AI future, so does the art of gift giving
09:34Because surveys have found that a lot of people are using generative AI for present ideas
09:39I love the idea that tomorrow there's going to be men everywhere
09:42Blaming AI for misjudged gifts for their other halves
09:44LAUGHTER
09:46It's just going, I mean, Jack GPT just said anal beads, I don't even know why
09:51LAUGHTER
09:53Like, the technology's just not, it's just not right
09:55By the way, love, do us a favour, can you quickly ring your mum and tell her not to open hers?
09:59LAUGHTER
10:03So we've decided to use AI tonight to choose our presents for each other
10:07And to deliver them, would you please welcome all the way from the future, Robot Santa!
10:11Santa!
10:13Santa, baby, yes, let the saving and the virtue
10:18For me
10:20Bring in half a good day
10:24Santa, baby
10:26To hide all the teeth
10:28I mean, the technology in the future is amazing, isn't it?
10:31I tell you what, the robot's improved more than the trolley, hasn't it?
10:35LAUGHTER
10:36LAUGHTER
10:38It's not often I get to say this about other people, but you do walk a bit funny, don't you?
10:42LAUGHTER
10:47Can the robot do the Vs towards Alex?
10:50LAUGHTER
10:51LAUGHTER
10:53All right, so we started by asking AI the question, what is a good Christmas present for Alex Brooker?
10:58Now, once we explained who Alex Brooker was...
11:00LAUGHTER
11:02LAUGHTER
11:04It suggested a personalised Arsenal jersey
11:07Yes, please!
11:08Could you please bring the presents over...
11:11LAUGHTER
11:13Do you know what?
11:14Yeah
11:15RADA is fucking good, isn't it?
11:17LAUGHTER
11:21LAUGHTER
11:23LAUGHTER
11:25Four years of debt for this!
11:28LAUGHTER
11:30Thank you very much
11:32It's good to have Daniel Day-Lewis back in the game, isn't it?
11:35LAUGHTER
11:37Unbelievable!
11:38Back a bit, Rob... There we go!
11:39Oh, there we go!
11:40Thank you!
11:41Thank you, Robot Santa!
11:44LAUGHTER
11:46They said... Do you know what?
11:47When they said Greg Wallace would never be back on TV...
11:50LAUGHTER
11:52APPLAUSE
11:57LAUGHTER
11:59LAUGHTER
12:00So, I started out by asking AI what to get for Alex...
12:05Yes?
12:06..and it said a personalised Arsenal jersey.
12:07Am I allowed to open it?
12:08You are allowed to open it.
12:09Oh, wow!
12:10So, we've got you an Arsenal jersey, and on the back we've got the picture of you...
12:15..with Declan Rice and Big John drinking the Frosé.
12:18Oh, yes, please!
12:19Merry Christmas!
12:23I love this robot, he did a little...
12:25..he did a little happy dance when it was good!
12:28So, when I asked...
12:31LAUGHTER
12:32How is the robot funnier than all of us?
12:34LAUGHTER
12:35This is the future, Josh.
12:36LAUGHTER
12:38So, when I asked AI what to get Josh, it said,
12:41something that balances his sober lifestyle, his love of home,
12:45his writing work and his comedic vibe.
12:47Oh, that's genuinely nice!
12:49It said, a premium tea gift set and notebook combo with a personal note.
12:55So, an AI wrote the note.
12:57Oh, for when you fancy putting the kettle on.
13:00I genuinely like this.
13:02For when you fancy putting the kettle on and jamming down those five-minute observations.
13:07LAUGHTER
13:09This is the great thing.
13:10It also added,
13:11Josh is an observational comedian who focuses on the minutiae of everyday life rather than big topical issues.
13:19LAUGHTER
13:21I think anyone who's seen me trying to walk around the news on this show would agree with that.
13:25LAUGHTER
13:26And so, what did AI suggest for me?
13:29Well, AI, they got...
13:31So, basically, they said, something that was tied to your interest in disability awareness and sport,
13:35but more importantly, a high-quality item that acknowledges that part of his life but not in a pitying way.
13:41They wanted us to give you something empowering.
13:44Not in a pitying way?
13:45No, so we didn't want to get you any sort of present that would kind of sound pitying at all.
13:50OK.
13:51So, we've got you a book...
13:52You have got me a book.
13:53..which is called The Little Disabled Engine That Could.
13:58LAUGHTER
14:02Thank you so much, boys.
14:03I can add that to my collection, along with C-Spot Limp.
14:06LAUGHTER
14:08Oh, the places you'll park.
14:10And can we also have a big thank you to Robot Santa!
14:15CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
14:20Now, Christmas telly is also changing.
14:23There's a reality series on Hallmark this year called Finding Mr Christmas.
14:27The TV show focuses on ten aspiring actors who compete for the chance to be the next leading man in a Hallmark Christmas film.
14:34Here is the cheesy trailer for the wholesome reality series.
14:38Boy, do I have an early holiday gift for you.
14:41We are back for season two with an all-new group of hunks and festive face-offs.
14:46Check out this sneak peek.
14:47It's a huge house.
14:48I'm down to stay here for a while.
14:50What's up, guys?
14:51What's up, fellas?
14:52What's up, Angel?
14:53Dude, it's so epic.
14:55Dude, we've got the trust circle going on already.
14:58LAUGHTER
15:00I don't trust that trust circle.
15:03LAUGHTER
15:04Have you seen Finding Mr Easter?
15:06It's a bit bleaker because the winner gets nailed to a cross.
15:08LAUGHTER
15:10LAUGHTER
15:11Now, throughout the show...
15:21Sorry, it's the latest photo reggie for you.
15:25Honestly, it was just everything you say with a ponytail.
15:30Now, throughout the show, this Finding Mr Christmas...
15:32Did you just get a cut away of my fucking ponytail?
15:34LAUGHTER
15:36We've never used that camera angle in 15 years!
15:40LAUGHTER
15:42That's not one of our angles!
15:44Where's that?
15:45I don't even know where that camera is!
15:47LAUGHTER
15:49Throughout Finding Mr Christmas, the actors have to complete a series of challenges,
15:53including gift wrapping, untangling Christmas lights and acting in a scene.
15:55But we think they missed a trick.
15:58Because we've got our own Mr Christmas here, Alex Brooker.
16:01I don't know why they didn't cast him, right?
16:03100%, mate.
16:05So, throughout the show tonight, we're going to set Alex a series of Christmassy tasks
16:09and he's going to do the first one now.
16:10We need you to head over there, please, Alex.
16:12I didn't know.
16:13Are you ready? Are you ready?
16:18It's based on this festive challenge.
16:22Remember, guys, presentation is important, but your personality and star quality are always on Santa's radar.
16:31Ooh!
16:32So give us your best runway walks and slay!
16:35Yeah!
16:37Link, you're up first.
16:40Ooh!
16:42Ooh!
16:44Okay, hello!
16:46Melissa, I don't want you to get too close to this fire.
16:48Sugar melts.
16:49Oh!
16:52Wow!
16:57So, it's time for Alex to take on the Mr Christmas catwalk challenge.
17:02Alex, I want some strut with a Goodwill to All Men vibe.
17:05Ha!
17:09Ha!
17:11Ha!
17:13Ha!
17:15Ha!
17:17Ha!
17:18Ha!
17:20Ha!
17:22Ha!
17:24Ha!
17:26Genuinely, by the way, don't get too close to me because I think this is flammable as fuck.
17:28I'm a boy as fuck.
17:31Alex, you're through to the next round.
17:33Yeah!
17:39All right, let's welcome tonight's guests.
17:41They're Bake Off royalty, which means much like real royalty,
17:44they're both in bread.
17:45Please welcome Alison Hammond and comedian Harry Hill.
17:58Oh, hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, I don't believe you, Francis Rossi and Tim Allen and Bernard Cribbins from the Railway Church.
18:15I thought it.
18:17Now, Alison, you has already received the best gift of all a few weeks ago when Prince Harry lip-synced to one of your exchanges from Bake Off.
18:26I thought I was dreaming when I saw that.
18:28So here's the perfectly timed clip with Stephen Colbert.
18:32If you was treated like a king for the day, what would you want me to do for you?
18:36Um, back for me, probably.
18:38You'd want me to do what?
18:40Beg.
18:41Beg.
18:41Beg.
18:42Beg.
18:43Beg.
18:44Beg.
18:44Beg.
18:45Beg.
18:46Beg.
18:47Oh, bake!
18:53Oh.
18:55What a weird moment.
18:56I mean, someone's like, oh, my God, Prince Harry, me and Prince Harry are connected now.
19:02You're totally like that.
19:03You know what I mean?
19:03We're tied.
19:04Yeah.
19:04I mean, how can I be humble now, do you know what I mean?
19:06LAUGHTER
19:07Does it make me kind of, like, royalty now?
19:10Like, am I a princess?
19:12Am I?
19:12Yeah, but it does appear that Prince Harry has got a lot of time on his hands now.
19:17LAUGHTER
19:18LAUGHTER
19:19Harry, what are your Christmas traditions?
19:30Um, well, we always, what we do with the TV, when we have the Christmas lunch,
19:36and then we have, we've got one of those TVs that you can bring round, you know, it comes,
19:41you can angle it round.
19:42It's on the wall, but you can angle it round.
19:44Yeah.
19:44And so we bring it round so that it's across the other side of the table, and then we have
19:49the King's Speech on there.
19:50So it's like he's joining us.
19:53LAUGHTER
19:53And look, we talked about Alex's 13-foot tree in his garden.
20:06Anything special in your garden this Christmas?
20:08Oh, well, we've got robins, actually, nesting.
20:11Yeah.
20:11Aw.
20:12Yeah, I know.
20:13We put up a nesting box last year, and we've got some, actually, some baby robins in there.
20:20Yeah, and I've actually got a camera.
20:22You know, one of those little tiny cameras.
20:24Oh, yeah, yeah.
20:24Yeah.
20:25It's like a bird watch.
20:26Yeah, with, like, a live feed.
20:27Yeah.
20:28Um, could we see that, or...?
20:30We have got it.
20:31Yes, yes, we can.
20:32Yes, we can.
20:32Let's see the live feed of your...
20:33There's a little robin in there this morning.
20:34Oh, that's so lovely.
20:35But, um...
20:36LAUGHTER
20:37LAUGHTER
20:38LAUGHTER
20:39LAUGHTER
20:41LAUGHTER
20:42LAUGHTER
20:43LAUGHTER
20:44APPLAUSE
20:46Oh!
20:47LAUGHTER
20:48LAUGHTER
20:52We'll have more last week for you after the break as we chat to Rick Astley
21:00and find out which one of our guests had a crush on him as a teenager.
21:03See you in a little bit.
21:04APPLAUSE
21:06Welcome back to Last Leg.
21:24We're joined by Alison Hammond and Harry Hill.
21:27Uh, Alex is starting to change like Tim Allen in, uh...
21:32I'm not.
21:33Are you not?
21:34I'm the same as what I did, no.
21:35I'm all right, mate.
21:35I don't think that's how you looked in the last part.
21:38That's absolutely the same, mate.
21:39OK.
21:40Changing the tall.
21:41All right, Josh, do you want to explain what's going on with you?
21:43I'm going through the Band-Aid video.
21:45LAUGHTER
21:47I, er...
21:47I didn't know Hanson were in Band-Aid.
21:49LAUGHTER
21:50Handsome?
21:51LAUGHTER
21:53I can't hear much, by the way.
21:55LAUGHTER
21:56I'm Sting from Band-Aid.
21:58Look at that.
21:58LAUGHTER
22:02I can't hear anything.
22:04I'm getting Gail Tilsley off-coordination.
22:06LAUGHTER
22:08Anyone else doing that?
22:10APPLAUSE
22:11I'm getting...
22:12I'm getting Gail Tilsley and Paul Hollywood.
22:15LAUGHTER
22:18And obviously, I'm now Tom Hanks as Woody from Toy Story.
22:21Oh, yes. Oh, yeah.
22:22Because the final scene of Toy Story is when they all become friends
22:24at Christmas.
22:25Yes.
22:26Time now to welcome another guest to the Last Leg Christmas celebration.
22:30He's a soul singer whose songs may be the one thing
22:32your family doesn't fight over this Christmas.
22:34Please welcome...
22:35Rick Astley!
22:36CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
22:38CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
22:40CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
22:42CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
22:44CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
22:47Welcome to the party, Rick.
23:01What are your Christmas traditions?
23:02Um, eating and drinking, I think, pretty much.
23:05Yes!
23:06My wife is Danish and we have quite a lot of Scandinavian tradition
23:09in our Christmas.
23:10Bacon?
23:11Uh, yeah, a lot of bacon, actually.
23:12Um, yeah, yeah.
23:13But also, um, they celebrate on the eve, on the 24th.
23:18Yes.
23:19So we've got into that habit over the years of doing that, so...
23:21Well, I'm very sorry that you're here tonight on Christmas Eve.
23:23I know.
23:24Well, exactly.
23:25I'm...exactly.
23:26I'm straight back there after this, and if there's anything left,
23:30I'll be, you know, lovely.
23:32LAUGHTER
23:34No, so, to be honest, tomorrow is a bit like our Boxing Day,
23:36to be honest.
23:37Right.
23:38More chill and, you know, so...
23:39Yep.
23:40Yeah.
23:41Now, we asked AI to suggest, um, a present for you.
23:43I can't wait.
23:44OK.
23:45LAUGHTER
23:46It said maybe a rare vinyl copy of something like The Smiths.
23:49Yeah.
23:50Because you did a show of Smith songs at Glastonbury.
23:52Indeed I did.
23:53I saw it.
23:54Which, yeah, you saw it, and one of our team was there
23:56and captured the joy Josh felt as he watched you perform.
23:59This is genuine footage.
24:01MUSIC PLAYS
24:20What a nice...
24:21One of the best hours of my life.
24:23Oh, my God.
24:24APPLAUSE
24:25And watching that video, this is going to blow your mind.
24:28That was after I stopped drinking.
24:30LAUGHTER
24:31Right.
24:33Harry, you share Rick's love of Morrissey's music.
24:36Uh...
24:37His music?
24:38Yeah, not so much his...
24:39LAUGHTER
24:42But you...
24:43Don't talk about that, do we?
24:45You performed as Morrissey?
24:47I was...
24:48I did Morrissey and Stars in there.
24:49I...
24:50I remember it.
24:51We have a dazzling clip of the enthusiastic performance
24:53from the turn of the millennium.
24:55APPLAUSE
24:56Morrissey!
24:57APPLAUSE
24:58World War Thank You
24:59All right.
25:04Yay, all right.
25:35I haven't met Morrissey, but part of it was you had to get permission.
25:38So I had to get permission from Morrissey to impersonate him.
25:41There was a...
25:43Or to do that song.
25:44And I got a fax through, in the old days of faxes,
25:47and it was signed by Morrissey saying,
25:50good luck, Morrissey.
25:51And so I thought, oh...
25:53So Morrissey's on the other end of this number,
25:55because the number is there.
25:56I thought, well, I'll...
25:57And I had this idea, so I sent him a fax back saying,
26:01how about you and me do a novelty single for Christmas,
26:05our version of Little Donkey.
26:07Wow.
26:08But I never... He never... Never heard back.
26:10I mean, you've got your own quiff.
26:14I have. I have to wear an artificial one.
26:16But if you liked, I could...
26:18Would you like me to reprise the...
26:20Would you like me to... Yes.
26:21Yes, yes. Have you got the... Yes.
26:22I don't know if... I'm not feeling it.
26:24Come on!
26:25CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
26:27What a showman!
26:31He knows how to get the crowd going.
26:35Here we go. Here we go.
26:37CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
26:40Lovely.
26:41Which... It's uncanny.
26:43LAUGHTER
26:44Little donkey...
26:46Little donkey...
26:49On a dusty road...
26:52Keep on...
26:54Flooding onwards...
26:56With your hair...
26:58CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
27:02LAUGHTER
27:04Brilliant.
27:05Oh, mercy, everyone.
27:07Oh, mercy.
27:09Merry Christmas.
27:10So good.
27:12Alison, is it true you had a teenage crush on Rick?
27:15Well, it's not the sort of place I would, like,
27:18probably admit it, with Rick literally sitting there.
27:21But he already knows.
27:22We've met quite a few times and now I'm quite cool with it.
27:25Are you?
27:26Like, I'm all right.
27:27I'm totally cool with, like, being in the...
27:29As long as Harry's sat between us.
27:30Oh, yeah, exactly.
27:31LAUGHTER
27:32So, Alison, just to clarify your story,
27:34you used to fancy Rick Astley...
27:36No, I said no more.
27:37..then you met him and now it's going to work.
27:39LAUGHTER
27:40Not at all, Josh.
27:42Obviously, I've still got feelings, but there is, like, you know...
27:44Have you?
27:45LAUGHTER
27:46Do you want to expand on that?
27:47LAUGHTER
27:48Listen, I'm not saying there's a chance...
27:50There's a wife! There's a wife!
27:51There's a wife!
27:52Do you want to expand on that?
27:53I just...
27:54I feel like I'm the...
27:55Come on, get off your brink.
27:56Come on, Harry, hurry over!
27:57Come on, Harry, go there.
27:58Honestly...
27:59Oh, no!
28:00I don't know why I'm that wanted.
28:01LAUGHTER
28:02CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
28:05Listen...
28:06APPLAUSE
28:08LAUGHTER
28:09LAUGHTER
28:10Obviously, I was a lot younger than I am now,
28:13and obviously, I still get the same feelings.
28:16LAUGHTER
28:17I'm going to say it.
28:19There's a chance you're going to be Rickrolled.
28:20LAUGHTER
28:23Come back, Harry!
28:25Come back, Harry!
28:26Harry!
28:27Alison, on the very night that his wife is celebrating Christmas!
28:31LAUGHTER
28:32LAUGHTER
28:33Well, she's not here, is she?
28:34Miss her!
28:36LAUGHTER
28:37LAUGHTER
28:38Just out of interest, Rick, where can Alison see you perform next year?
28:42LAUGHTER
28:44LAUGHTER
28:45Um, here, there and everywhere, we're on tour in April, which...
28:48Are we?
28:49Yes, we're all on tour.
28:50LAUGHTER
28:51LAUGHTER
28:52Short notice.
28:53LAUGHTER
28:54Yeah, so, um...
28:55Yes.
28:56We can't wait.
28:57We can't wait, we're looking forward to it.
28:59And now, Harry, you and Alison both host different versions of Bake Off,
29:02but you have brought your own showstopper to the show tonight.
29:05LAUGHTER
29:06Yeah, I've got to go back there again.
29:07Go on.
29:08LAUGHTER
29:09Well, I just think, you know, people forget what Christmas is really about.
29:15Yeah.
29:16And what they concentrate on is the food, you know, it's all about the food.
29:19Mm.
29:20So, what I've done is I've done a, um, my own savoury nativity...
29:25LAUGHTER
29:27Brussels!
29:28LAUGHTER
29:29Which I've made, which I've made myself, and what...
29:33So, we're just trying to get the message of Christmas through...
29:38..through food.
29:40Smells lovely.
29:41And...
29:42Do you want me to talk you through it?
29:44Yeah.
29:45So, these are frazzles on the roof of the, uh...
29:48LAUGHTER
29:49That's the...
29:50It's a pom-bear...
29:51LAUGHTER
29:52..as the angel Gabriel.
29:54LAUGHTER
29:55And then we have the three kings here, which I...
29:58I made from pepperamis, cos they're spicy, a bit more exotic.
30:03LAUGHTER
30:04You've got the two sausages here, Joseph and Mary.
30:08Obviously, Joseph is a bit taller than Mary.
30:10LAUGHTER
30:12And then you've got the star of the show, the baby Jesus,
30:16which is a pig in blanket, and there's the...
30:19LAUGHTER
30:21I don't mean that in a sort of negative...
30:23You know, you know...
30:24LAUGHTER
30:25I don't want any trouble.
30:27LAUGHTER
30:28You've got the manger made out of chip sticks, they're nice.
30:30And then you've got the...you've got the halo there.
30:32LAUGHTER
30:34So that's just something that perhaps people could, you know,
30:36make their own tradition now.
30:38LAUGHTER
30:39The savoury nativity.
30:40Would you like to...?
30:41Have you got it in kit form?
30:43Do you, like, sell it in a kit? Could you...?
30:44It's about 12 quid.
30:46LAUGHTER
30:47I mean, the slight problem with it is, to secure the sausages,
30:51you do have to use, um...screws.
30:54LAUGHTER
30:56And we're going to have more last leg for you after the break,
30:59as Alex performs a Hallmark Christmas scene
31:01we've written just for tonight, but right now,
31:04Rick Astley is going to perform his first Christmas hit of the night.
31:07Before he does, though, we've talked a lot about Alex's love of Christmas,
31:11but Lib Dem leader Ed Davey revealed in an interview this year
31:14that he listens to Christmas tunes all year round.
31:17Wow.
31:18How do we feel about that? Is that all right?
31:19Oh, I wouldn't...
31:20But isn't his birthday on Christmas Day?
31:22That's the reason, isn't it?
31:23I think his birthday's on Christmas Day,
31:25so that's probably one of the reasons why it means a lot to him.
31:28Yeah, because otherwise it'd just be fucking weird.
31:30LAUGHTER
31:32Well, he's going to make the next bit awkward.
31:45Rick is going to play us into the break,
31:47but who better to introduce him than the leader of the Lib Dems...
31:51LAUGHTER
31:52..so, Ed Davey.
31:54LAUGHTER
31:56Hi, guys, it's Ed Davey here.
31:58Merry Christmas to you all.
32:00It's true, I like listening to Christmas music all year round.
32:04The reason is, my daughter and I love winding up her mum,
32:09and it's on my iPhone, and we play it in the car all the time.
32:12Erm, I'm never going to give up Christmas.
32:15So here's Rick Astley.
32:17APPLAUSE
32:19Sleigh bells ring, are you listening?
32:29In a lane, snow is glisting.
32:33A beautiful sight, we're happy tonight.
32:38Walking in a winter wonderland.
32:41Glitter on, we'll conspire.
32:45As we dream, by the fire.
32:49To face unafraid, the plans that remain.
32:53Walking in a winter wonderland.
32:56Come on, bro, let's go.
32:57We're talking, let's go.
33:01MUSIC PLAYS
33:14MUSIC PLAYS
33:18MUSIC PLAYS
33:23MUSIC PLAYS
33:27Welcome back to Last Leg, we're joined by Alison Hammond and Harry Hill.
33:39Alex, you're definitely changing.
33:41I feel a little bit more Christmassy at the moment.
33:43Do you?
33:44I'm feeling it a little bit different at the moment, but...
33:47You're definitely progressing.
33:49No, I haven't.
33:50OK, Josh, would you like to explain who you are now?
33:55No, I'm from the Band-Aid video.
33:57Yeah.
33:58So I'm Sarah Dallin from Bananarama, of course.
34:00LAUGHTER
34:05Look at these jeans, they're fucking brilliant.
34:07Yeah.
34:11It ain't what I do, it's the way that I do it.
34:12We've always said it.
34:14And obviously, I'm Tom Hanks in the movie Forrest Gump,
34:17because he famously said life is like a box of chocolates,
34:19and the main time you get chocolates is at Christmas.
34:22LAUGHTER
34:24You still look a bit like you're going to strip.
34:26LAUGHTER
34:28Yeah, Forrest Hump.
34:30LAUGHTER
34:31And now, throughout the show,
34:32we've been putting Alex through his paces to see how he'd fare
34:34on the US reality series Finding Mr Christmas.
34:38The winner of the first series, by the way,
34:39earned a leading role in a holiday movie
34:42about the owner of a Seattle dog shelter
34:44who falls for a meticulous web page editor.
34:47The movie was called Happy Howlidays.
34:50LAUGHTER
34:51See what you did there.
34:52And see what they did there.
34:53Love it.
34:54All right, I'm going to send everyone...
34:55If you could all go over and get ready
34:56for the next challenge for Alex, please.
34:58Hi.
34:59Over in that corner of the studio.
35:00So, Alex's final challenge tonight
35:02is to test out his acting chops
35:04in a scene we've written
35:06as the ultimate hallmark Christmas movie.
35:09Lights, camera, Christmas.
35:12APPLAUSE
35:17Help! Help!
35:20I need an emergency appointment.
35:22Oh, my God!
35:23It's Alison Hammond, the big city TV presenter.
35:26That's right.
35:27I've become so career-focused,
35:29I've lost touch with what's important in life.
35:31I'm single and I'm home for the holidays.
35:34And?
35:35And I've hit a dog.
35:39Oh!
35:41Oh, my God!
35:42What happened?
35:43LAUGHTER
35:44APPLAUSE
35:45I'll tell you what happened.
35:46It's quite difficult to talk,
35:47cos it's really tight on the jaw.
35:48At least do a dog voice.
35:50LAUGHTER
35:51LAUGHTER
35:56I'll tell you what happened.
35:59It's quite difficult to talk cos it's really tight on the jaw.
36:02At least do a dog voice.
36:05LAUGHTER
36:07I'll tell you what happened.
36:09That's better.
36:10Yeah, is that better?
36:11That's better.
36:12I was just sitting there by the side of the road
36:14licking my own balls.
36:17the side of the road licking my own balls and she came around the corner like a lunatic and hit me
36:23yeah but he's such a cutie i've really fallen for him is there anyone here who can treat him
36:29i can't let him die i'm the presenter of for the love of dogs of course miss hammond do you know
36:36what the hot vet will see you now oh but i'm next i'm sorry mr hill your your cat's gonna
36:41have to wait it's not the cat i'm worried about it it's the robins um i'm afraid miss hammond is next
36:56but i'm on the telly i know but not as much as allison no one's on the telly as much as
37:03the hot vet will see you now
37:05somebody order a dream boat are you the hot vet yes i'm sweating buckets do you know how hard it is
37:16to operate with these little hands you look like a man who could really heal my heart i mean dog
37:23what kind of dog is it i don't know one of those really little whiny ones by the looks of it
37:28i'll tell you what why don't you come back to my charming little cottage and have christmas with
37:35me and my children they've been missing a mother figure in their life ever since my wife died in a
37:40tragic christmas kite accident yeah and then we could go back to the big city and maybe you could
37:48become the resident vet on this morning there you go little fella get that on there boy
38:00stop whinging or i'll cut your bollocks off come on princess let's go
38:04hey what about my robins
38:15this christmas alex brooker is the hot vet in hallmark's new movie vet the hall
38:30this is rob he was in the news this year for a christmasy reason
39:00but what was it can we have the dramatic lighting change please
39:07so did rob get suspended from broad and radio for playing all i want for christmas is you
39:12on october the 3rd did he get suspended as a school exam invigilator after playing merry
39:19christmas everyone by slade to signal the end of the final exam or did rob get suspended by an
39:25undertaker after mistakenly playing last christmas rather than the last post at a funeral
39:36what do you think well i don't think you'd make a mistake at a funeral you'd be well prepared
39:41does he look like an undertaker that's a grave digger that's a grave digger
39:51i'll tell you what we'll reveal the mystery guests after the break
39:53rick astley is going to sing us into christmas we'll see you in a little bit
40:14welcome back to last leg we're joined by alison hammond and harry hill alex has now become full
40:20father christmas you know what in another reality where the cards had fallen different he'd currently
40:34be doing that in a grotto in a garden center you're not entirely sure what's going on with your costume
40:40well i didn't think we had very long so i was the dog already so i just shoved mine on top of the dog
40:47okay so i'm boy george
41:00do you know what i'm calling this outfit what here boy george
41:04lovely and clearly i'm tom hanks from castaway uh because when he first experiences pain
41:14due to an infected tooth that goes on to become an ongoing issue whilst he's on the island
41:18he's at a christmas dinner oh and i've got the volleyball as well um
41:22um
41:32before the break we challenged our guest to work out how this person was connected to the news
41:36can we have the options again please
41:40yes this is rob and he was connected to the news this year for christmassy reason
41:44but what was it was it because rob got suspended from broad and radio for playing all i want for
41:49christmas is you on october the 3rd was it because he got suspended as a school exam invigilator after
41:55playing merry christmas everyone by slade to signal the end of the final exam or did he get suspended
42:02by an undertaker after mistakenly playing last christmas rather than the last post at a funeral
42:10harry ellison could we uh could you say something sort of uh local radio ish
42:16that we could see on the show well hi folks hope you're having a good sunday uh yeah is that it
42:24a good voice for radio could you say you could have said no rob
42:33shall we go with the radio yes we think would they suspend someone just for playing it's a bit mean
42:39isn't it if they've done that that is mean it's a cutthroat world local i won't be listening to that
42:44radio station anyway that's the last time you listen to broadland radio isn't it well i thought you
42:51said broad more rob can you reveal your identity please i am indeed rob chandler breakfast presenter at
43:07broadland radio and i was suspended for playing a mariah carey christmas song early in october amazing
43:14oh geez so why did you play it and then why did they suspend you well it started with a text from a
43:22listener called becky who said she was putting out her christmas stock in her shop and could i play a
43:29christmas song so i thought tell you what if i get at least five listener texts saying ho ho ho exactly
43:39i'll consider it and we did we we got a load of text saying ho ho ho one or two saying no no no but
43:47then billy the taxi driver you must know billy the taxi driver no
43:51um another keen listener text and said there's a tub of chocolates in it for you if you play mariah
44:02carey all i want for christmas is you so came back after the news and i read that text out and i said
44:10quite frankly i'm disappointed billy that you could think i could be so shallow
44:15but to fall here we go for such a blatant bribe yeah ding ding ding oh he played a song yeah how long
44:25was you suspended for how long was you one day oh is that all yeah did you go shopping what did
44:32you do yeah well just stayed in bed all day can we please have a round of applause for rob
44:38uh all right we are about to end the show with a christmas sing-along from rick astley but before
44:47we do would you please thank our guests alison hammond
44:52harry hill and my co-host josh riddicker and alex brooker we'll be back next week for our new year's
45:02eve special with an incredible lineup musician peter doherty comedians maizey adam and phil wang
45:07national treasure sir lenny henry tv personality danny dyer rugby star hannah botterman lioness lucy
45:13bronze as well as a celebrity barman who is 100 faithful right now though rick astley is going
45:20to sing us into christmas thanks for watching your last leg my name's adam hills merry christmas to all
45:25and to all a good night
45:35you better watch out you better not cry you better not pow i'm telling you why
45:42santa claus is coming to town
45:47it's snowy road let's go
45:56he sees you when you're sleeping he knows when you're awake he knows if you've been bad or good so be good
46:01for goodness sake
46:15he sees you when you're sleeping he knows when you're awake he knows when you're awake he knows if you've been bad or good so be good for goodness sake
46:29you better watch out you better not cry you better not cry i'm telling you why
46:36you better not cry santa claus is coming to town
46:42he's got eight billion toys on his sleigh he's packed he's coming your way
46:48santa
46:49It's coming in town
46:55Ba-ba-da-ba-ba-ba-da-ba
46:58Bang! Merry Christmas!
47:00Yeah!
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