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00:01Ladies and gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to Lenny Ray!
00:12It's an extraordinary feeling to think of something
00:17and over the top of your head that makes people laugh.
00:21It's a gift.
00:22Perfect version of a modern man. Attractive. Very funny, which I think is very important.
00:37P.S. My mum, Brackets Jackie, loves you.
00:45And the winner is...
00:47Lenny Bray for Glass Houses.
00:52W-W-W-W-W-Deep!
00:56We are a kitchener!
00:59When the music begins to be set for a place.
01:02A water-or-or-or-or-or-or-or-or-or-or in-game.
01:05It's a beautiful special guest.
01:06I really came to be a home.
01:09In the prison room, there is no place.
01:12If you are a home, please check out or visit us.
01:15No, not a house.
01:17I'm a victim.
01:19I don't know.
01:48Baggy, Baggy, please.
01:51I don't want to go to bed on an argument,
01:54especially not about something so stupid as this.
01:59Did we just...
02:00What, sleep?
02:01Yes.
02:02How are we supposed to go to sleep?
02:03Well, this will probably be all over sodding papers tomorrow.
02:06You can sleep fine because you know it's all lies.
02:10Nothing happened.
02:11Nothing happened.
02:13Neighbours don't know that, do they?
02:15I've never even met this woman.
02:17I know that.
02:18Nobody else does.
02:24Are we going to do this every time there's a bogus allegation?
02:37Girl.
02:38Bloody ridiculous.
02:39And the cleaner doesn't know it's a lie.
02:40Oh, if we're worried about what the cleaner thinks of us,
02:43maybe we shouldn't employ her to clean the house.
02:45What I'm saying is it's humiliating.
02:48I don't even know who this woman is.
02:50She could be made up, for all I know.
02:52I can still hate it.
02:53I can still hate how attritional it is.
02:57This is like being accused of having an affair with a tooth fairy.
03:01It can still make me feel rubbish.
03:13Look.
03:14She's crazy, just like the rest of them.
03:17It's just endless crap.
03:20Years of bullshit.
03:22Every single one of them disappears.
03:25The moment they get a stern letter just pointing out,
03:27there's no basis for any of it.
03:29There's no evidence.
03:31Nothing.
03:32Nothing happened.
03:34It's all made up.
03:35But the papers still go with it, because I'm me.
03:43Look.
03:43These sheets, yeah?
03:44They're Egyptian cotton.
03:46They've barely seen our bum cheeks,
03:48because we've been in the Maldives.
03:49That's the life we have.
03:51And the price we pay for it is these liars and maniacs.
03:56But why am I telling you this?
03:57You know this.
04:00You're a psychotherapist, for God's sake.
04:02I'm sorry.
04:16Just let them write it.
04:20Let them write whatever they want.
04:23TV funny man shags burrito, whatever.
04:26There's never been anyone else.
04:35I tell you every day,
04:38I love you.
04:41Yeah.
04:45Past the edges of time.
04:52What was that?
04:53Should we press the buzzer?
05:05It's in the kitchen.
05:08Well, you might need something.
05:09It could be dangerous.
05:11You might need help.
05:12Then we should call the police.
05:13Oh, is he around the doorbell?
05:15Yes.
05:15Oh, my God.
05:26Quick.
05:26Yeah, yeah.
05:27Come on.
05:28Oh, Jesus.
05:55Please.
05:56They attacked me.
05:57Who attacked you?
05:59They took my bike and my phone.
06:02Who?
06:03I don't know.
06:06Oh.
06:08My phone's upstairs.
06:09I'll call you an ambulance.
06:10No.
06:11Please.
06:12What do you need?
06:17You're the only one that answered.
06:18Do you want to come in?
06:27Or...
06:28Can you stand?
06:31Oh, my God.
06:33Oh, my God.
06:35Come on.
06:36Let's just...
06:38Let's get you sorted out.
06:42Okay.
06:43You should just...
06:57Here, sit here.
06:57Sit here.
06:58Yeah.
06:59Here, sit here.
07:04Sorry.
07:05No, don't be ridiculous.
07:08I know it's late.
07:11Did you hit your head?
07:12Are you bleeding?
07:13I don't really think we ought to call you an ambulance, you know?
07:16It's okay.
07:18You collapsed.
07:19I think it was just a shock.
07:21I don't know.
07:21You might be concussed.
07:23It's just my shoulder.
07:24You sure about that?
07:26I just need...
07:28Some water.
07:30Right.
07:30Of course.
07:31Yeah.
07:32It was what?
07:34Was it randoms?
07:35Or...
07:36I was...
07:38I was delivering pizza.
07:40I was going to number 20.
07:42I got the money and they...
07:44They just come out of nowhere.
07:45We should definitely call the police.
07:47I don't thought they'd be able to do anything.
07:49You've been robbed.
07:50It'll be long gone.
07:51Well, probably, but...
07:52When my flat got broken into, the police, they didn't even turn up.
07:56Oh, yeah.
07:56But they're a bit quicker around here, mate.
07:57No.
08:03No, please.
08:04Uh...
08:06I'll...
08:07I'll go to the station.
08:09I just need to get my shit together.
08:11No problem.
08:11No, please.
08:16I don't know my license.
08:19How?
08:20It's only part-time to help me pay my way through uni.
08:25I can't afford to lose this job.
08:27Well, you should definitely report it.
08:34I will.
08:34I promise.
08:35And learn to drive.
08:37Yeah.
08:39They can't be allowed to get away with it.
08:41It's fucking feral.
08:43What were they, kids?
08:4517?
08:4618, maybe.
08:47But they were big.
08:48Hopped up on Minecraft and balloons.
08:51And they were fast.
08:52Don't need you to get that round here.
08:54If there's trouble round here, it's all planning consent for basement pools.
08:57People are going to fall to basement pool.
08:59They don't usually kick your head in.
09:00I could have done without them stealing my shoes.
09:04Yeah, why would they do that?
09:05Don't know.
09:06They're old as well.
09:08All the leather's coming off.
09:10Maybe they're mending them.
09:12Maybe they're feral cobblers.
09:13There you go.
09:14Can I get you a shirt, or...?
09:19Mm-mm.
09:21Yeah.
09:22Yeah, please.
09:23If you don't mind.
09:25Yeah, I could stretch to a shirt.
09:26I've got some old trainers here somewhere.
09:28If I can find them.
09:29I don't know where anything is.
09:30They're clean and move things around like a mouse.
09:33Without the incontinence.
09:34I don't know where anything is.
10:04I don't know where anything is.
10:10I don't know where anything is.
10:10Oh, oh, oh my god, I'm sorry, are you okay?
10:40Hi. Found one. Jumped by some kids out delivering pizza. God, who was it? Teenage mutant ninja wankers. Jesus, are you hurt? It's okay. What do you need? I'm fine, honestly. You don't look great. Take aim for your money. She's just coming for your self-esteem. I didn't mean that. I mean, we should call an ambulance. It's just my shoulder. You collapsed.
11:10It's just shot. I'm feeling... Okay, did you call the police? No. I can do that for you.
11:21Wait. He's going to go to the station when he's got his breath back.
11:25Right. Did he give you food? Would you like a sandwich? How quickly do you think I can make a sandwich?
11:39Oh, we're cream. In a sandwich? Antiseptic for the... for the cuts. Please. You don't have to do anything. Nonsense. Let me make you a sandwich.
11:49Okay, if it's not too much trouble.
11:51What do we have? You like kimchi?
11:53He's a victim of violence. He's not a mystery diner.
12:01Just ignore his bad jokes. I do. Daily.
12:08Don't slice that too fit. You'll ruin a sandwich.
12:10For a minute, we thought you were, um, a crazy fan or something.
12:22Like New York?
12:24Yeah. He was intense.
12:26Showed up at, like, one in the morning.
12:28Not, like, three. He didn't leave.
12:31Made me sign his arse.
12:32Oh, my God. You're Lenny Bray.
12:44Oh, I'm sorry.
12:48That's all right. I'll see.
12:51I didn't realise that you were... you.
12:54Oh, well, my head's... my head's all...
12:57In your defence, I wasn't this fat 25 years ago.
13:01Um, I like your show.
13:04I mean, I've only seen a few episodes.
13:07You're forgiven on the grounds that you were a child when I made them.
13:10That's true.
13:11I'd like to be reminded of my own mortality.
13:16I mean, you're probably tired of hearing this all the time,
13:18but they were really funny.
13:21You're joking.
13:22If he doesn't hear it three times a day, he gets IBS.
13:25I like the American version, too.
13:28Because it was funnier.
13:29Yeah, we'll pay for this house.
13:33And your bee venom facials.
13:35Why don't you show him the wall?
13:48Oh, no.
13:49People like it.
13:50It has all his, um, memorabilia and silly trophies.
13:55Come on.
13:57He's had a dreadful evening.
13:58It would be cool.
14:01What, to be reminded of how fantastic I was?
14:05No, no, no, okay.
14:07Just quickly, though.
14:07Oh, wow.
14:32Nice to have.
14:42These are the people you made that show with?
14:46Finally, that.
14:47Last day, I think.
14:49That's amazing.
14:51Good memories.
14:53People really love that show, huh?
14:54I've been lucky.
14:56Lenny, is it true that you wrote that first one by hand?
15:09What?
15:09The script for the first episode.
15:13Yeah.
15:18Your sandwich will be...
15:19Can I get an autograph?
15:21Is that still a thing?
15:23It's like getting smallpox, isn't it?
15:24Well, I don't have a phone.
15:26People won't believe that I've met you otherwise.
15:29Okay.
15:36You write me a message?
15:38Sure, yeah.
15:39Who's here?
15:41Ben.
15:44So, sorry you got beaten up on my road, Ben.
15:47They probably lack strong father figures.
15:50Or, like, I can never forget a day like this.
15:54Well, you know, some of them.
16:00We could do a photo on Maggie's phone and then send it on.
16:24And then you can get going.
16:26I'll give you a hug.
16:46Found the good cheese.
16:48Cheddar had a full head of hair on it.
16:50Great. Um, maybe you can put that in a Tupperware.
16:58Um, he, uh, Ben would like his quick photograph,
17:03and we could send that on.
17:05Right.
17:15Ready?
17:15Oh, that's lovely.
17:21Can we get one more for safety?
17:22No, I think we've got it.
17:24I blinked.
17:29Sure.
17:32One, two, three.
17:35Yes.
17:37Perfect.
17:38Can I see it?
17:39Um, sure.
17:41And, um, you can also just put your email in there.
17:44Yeah.
17:44And I can get you those trainers now, yeah?
17:48So what are you, a nine or a ten?
17:51What if they come back?
17:52Who, the, um...
17:53The people that attacked me.
17:54Well, then we should call the police.
17:55They can't help.
17:56Well, they might.
17:57They can't.
17:58Then we should, um, call the delivery people
18:00and see if they can send somebody.
18:04It's an Indian restaurant that we closed by now.
18:10Not pizza?
18:11Pizza?
18:11Pizza?
18:14All right.
18:22руз
18:23Okay.
18:25Okay.
18:26Isn't it, I'm just gonna grab some trainers now
18:29and then we can be done.
18:30Okay?
18:32Hey.
18:32and it's been really great to meet you and I'd love to talk some more but it is
18:37late now and you know I need my funny sleep okay all right listen I'm really
18:45honored that you love the show okay I really I mean that I really mean that
18:49means a lot but when people are on TV you know sometimes it's easy to forget
18:57that they're behind it all you know it's just ordinary and they can get scared
19:04yeah and I don't want anyone to be scared now no okay we can we could do some more
19:12photos yeah you could take take some stuff
19:27the phone what where in the bedroom you don't need to do this please I choose what
19:55happens okay okay please please I choose what happens okay I choose what happens now
20:06okay
20:07go
20:15go
20:16go
20:17go
20:19go
20:27go
20:31go
20:32go
20:33go
20:34go
20:37go
20:38go
20:41go
20:42go
20:43go
20:44go
20:47go
21:00go
21:02Get down.
21:23Hey, Ben. Ben.
21:25I know it might not feel like it,
21:27but things can still go well.
21:29And maybe you don't believe me,
21:32but you should.
21:33You should.
21:35I'm sorry.
21:36No, you're not.
21:38Why would I not be sorry?
21:39Because I just tied you up.
21:41Ben. Ben.
21:43Please talk to me.
21:45Why don't you come here?
21:55Hey. Hey.
21:56I'm listening.
21:57Okay?
22:02No one ever listens to me.
22:09Who doesn't listen to you?
22:12Ben, please talk to me.
22:13No!
22:15Hey.
22:16Hey, I'm just...
22:17I'm just asking a question, okay?
22:19You don't get to ask me questions.
22:21Right, okay, okay.
22:22But let's not rush things here, right?
22:25All my life.
22:29No one's ever listened to me.
22:31I'm listening to you.
22:31I'm listening to you right now.
22:33When I was four,
22:41I got my first new family.
22:44When I cried,
22:46because I was scared,
22:48because I wanted my mum,
22:51you know what they did?
22:54They put me in the furthest room.
22:59My mum at the heavy door.
23:00You couldn't hear me from there.
23:06That sounds like an awful experience.
23:08And not one of them
23:09cared about a single thing
23:12that ever came out of my mouth.
23:13And is that why you're here?
23:16Revenge.
23:17You want revenge on the world somehow,
23:20because if that is,
23:20then I totally understand.
23:22The world hasn't been that nice to you,
23:24but do you think this is going to help?
23:26Hurting us.
23:26Is that who you think I am?
23:33I think we can all be pushed to revenge
23:35if somebody hurts us,
23:36but the question is,
23:38can we stop ourselves?
23:40Shall we stop ourselves?
23:41Where's the script?
23:50What?
23:51The script.
23:51The first one.
23:52The first one that you wrote.
23:54Is that...
23:55Is that what this is about?
23:58Is that what you want?
24:00What?
24:01You want a memento?
24:03Like a fucking souvenir?
24:04Lenny.
24:05You break my house,
24:06you bust my ribs,
24:07you scare my wife...
24:08Lenny!
24:08For that?
24:10What, so you could show it off
24:11so it'd be like a fan,
24:12and then it's...
24:13Where is the fucking script?
24:15I'm listening, okay?
24:16I'm listening to you.
24:17I'm listening to you right now.
24:19No, it's in the safe.
24:20It's in the safe,
24:22in the office.
24:24It's...
24:24It's...
24:252-0...
24:272-3...
24:282-3-0-4-8-1.
24:32Just take it.
24:34Take it.
24:35Take whatever you want and go.
24:372-3-0.
24:39Oh!
24:40Oh!
24:40Oh!
24:41Oh!
24:41Oh!
24:42Oh!
24:43Oh!
24:43Oh!
24:45Oh!
24:47Oh!
24:47Oh!
24:47Oh!
24:48Oh!
24:50Oh!
24:51Oh!
24:52Oh!
24:53Oh!
24:56Oh!
24:56Oh!
24:58Oh!
24:58Oh!
24:59Oh!
24:59Oh!
25:00Oh!
25:02You stay here.
25:03Okay.
25:04What?
25:04I'm gonna go press the button.
25:05What?
25:06Maggie!
25:06Maggie! Maggie, what if he comes back for me?
25:12I'm going to get her some help.
25:36Maggie, what if he comes back?
26:06Oh, my god.
26:36S-s-s-shit.
27:06Oh, my God.
27:36Oh, my God.
28:06Oh, my God.
28:36Oh, my God.
29:06Oh, my God.
29:36Oh, my God.
30:06Oh, my God.
30:36Oh, my God.
31:06Oh, my God.
31:36Oh, my God.
32:07I'm used to people wanting me to go away.
32:09Oh, I can't think why.
32:10By the time I was 18, I'd had so many names.
32:16I didn't know who I was, must have knocked on a hundred doors, asking to see my case files, trying to find out.
32:25They said they lost them, they said they were burnt in a fire, I'm sorry that happened to you.
32:36The system contortes, I said, must have worked with a lot of people, must have worked with a lot of people on that show.
32:48Must have worked with a lot of people on that show, must have worked with a lot of cast, cast, crew.
33:01It takes a lot of people on that, but it takes a lot of people on that, but it's a lot of people on that, but it takes a lot of people on that, but it takes a lot of hands on deck to make something like that.
33:04Well, because of something you made up.
33:08That's a big responsibility.
33:11Major of the beast.
33:14Major of the beast.
33:16Tell me you're not one of those internet tossbots who doesn't like the ending.
33:26You want me to rewrite it?
33:28Like fucking misery.
33:29Is that what this is about?
33:33They're not commodities, are they?
33:36What?
33:37These people.
33:38You might get up, move on to the next thing, walk away, but if you use them, they'd get hurt.
33:45I don't know what this is about.
33:47You want me to confess to, what, being a prick?
33:52Being a showbiz prick?
33:54Someone who was nasty to your favourite characters?
33:58You want to cancel me?
34:00Okay, right.
34:01You're right.
34:03Throw a canapé into a room full of people I work with, you're probably going to hit someone I was a wanker to.
34:09You know, actors, directors, producers.
34:12Everything you've heard is probably true.
34:18Is that what you want to hear?
34:20A rich man regrets things.
34:25Well, if it makes you happy, yeah, why not?
34:28I regret it.
34:29But I was just trying to make something good, you know?
34:31And maybe you're here because I did.
34:33I got my case files in the end.
34:52A lot of the pages were black.
34:54There was so much stuff redacted.
34:56But I did get a picture with my mum.
34:58Only one I've got.
34:59And it was this.
35:08When she wrote this, I could barely write my own name.
35:15Do you remember her?
35:16I don't know what you're talking about.
35:19Production assistant.
35:21First series.
35:23Make coffee, probably.
35:23Fetch lunch.
35:24You said yourself, I work with a lot of people.
35:29I think you remember my mother.
35:32Well, untie me and we can go through my contacts.
35:36How about that?
35:40Her name was Nell.
35:44You don't remember her?
35:56Who was that?
35:57Apparently someone who handed me an almond croissant a quarter of a century ago.
36:02She knew you.
36:04A lot of people know me.
36:06Yeah, but she wrote about you.
36:07A lot of people write about me.
36:09One minute he says he loves me.
36:17And the next, he's so terrible, I feel like he'd rather I was dead.
36:21Is this a joke?
36:23I don't even know her.
36:24And I know all the reasons why I should live.
36:27But I can't do it anymore.
36:30Leonard.
36:30I swear, I remember her taking me to your set.
36:35I definitely remember being excited.
36:38Being happy.
36:41How long did it take you to ruin all that?
36:48Because she wrote this letter a year after you made that shot.
36:52No, no, that's impossible.
36:56We were together then.
36:57Leonard, what is this?
36:58It's just another liar wanting something he's not going to get.
37:02Go on, take the script.
37:04You can take whatever you want and get out.
37:09She says you told her to do it.
37:13She says you told her maybe she should end it.
37:15If being with you was making her so sad.
37:19Come on.
37:20Come on.
37:22Is that what you did?
37:23No.
37:26Did she tell her to do it?
37:28Look, I'm sorry to ruin your sad story.
37:30I don't even remember meeting your mother.
37:32Never mind falling in love with her.
37:46I sometimes wonder if...
37:49I was in the room when she wrote this.
37:52I'm so sorry for what happened to you.
38:08I know it's tough.
38:10I sometimes wonder if she meant for me to read this one day.
38:17But you have to understand that a lot of people say things about Lenny that just aren't true.
38:22And these lies we just have to deal with, even if it's hard.
38:29Maybe that's why she wrote it on the back of this.
38:32Hey, Nelly.
38:35Sorry I had to leave so early.
38:36I just wanted to let you know, I could never forget a day like this.
38:48Did you write that?
38:50Of course I didn't.
38:51Then why is it in your handwriting?
38:52Is this truly how pathetic and greedy you actually are?
38:58You think you could make me pay you to go away with this horse shit?
39:04Well, I just said that you loved her if the opposite was true.
39:06Leonard.
39:07I never said anything of the sort.
39:08I love you past the edges of time.
39:38Did you tell her to do it?
39:44Tell it to me!
39:47Did you tell her to do it?
39:53I'll tell you what's not in your case, Vile.
39:56Your mother was a fruitcake.
40:00Yeah.
40:02I just told her to shit or get off the pot if she's so unhappy.
40:07And you know what?
40:08I did her a favor.
40:11Shut up!
40:12I know I did because I was there when it happened.
40:31How do you fuck for free?
40:33So, yes, I do remember your pathetic little mother.
40:45I remember the look in her eyes.
40:50Almost...
40:52It almost looked like a smile.
40:53You choose what happens.
41:13You choose what happens.
41:15You choose.
41:16You choose what happens.
41:19It's gonna be okay.
41:25It's gonna be okay.
41:28It's gonna be okay.
41:29It's gonna be okay.
41:37It's going to be okay.
41:42Maggie!
41:44Yeah.
41:45Yeah.
41:47Yeah, a couple.
41:48A couple of them.
41:49Maggie!
41:51Yeah, yeah, a couple of times.
41:55Maggie, what are you doing?
41:57What are you doing?
41:58What are you doing?
41:58Oh!
41:59Oh!
42:03Come on.
42:03Come on.
42:04Come on.
42:05Come on!
42:06Come on!
42:07Come on!
42:08Come on!
42:09Come on!
42:10Oh, my God!
42:19I'm telling the police what happened.
42:23What I found when I came out of the shower.
42:29You attacking this young man because he came here to find out the truth about his mother,
42:42and I stopped it.
42:47Shh!
42:55Maggie.
42:56Shh!
42:57Shh!
43:07Maggie, don't...
43:09You know what this will do to me.
43:11Oh, my God.
43:12Oh, my God.
43:12I'm sorry.
43:12Oh, my God.
43:14Oh, my God.
43:17Oh, my God.
43:26Shh!
43:26Shh!
43:27Shh!
43:27Thank you for calling 999
43:39What's your emergency?
43:50And if you've been affected by the issues
43:52covered tonight, find information
43:54and support at
43:55channel5.com slash helplines
43:58Next week, play for today
44:02dives into the pressure of teaching
44:04a dodgy Ofsted report
44:06is just the start in special measures
44:08next Thursday at 9
44:09In just a moment, the Philpot fire
44:11a very British horror story
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