- 16 hours ago
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00:00But you have no grand bag.
00:01From Latisha.
00:02And let me tell you, your friend
00:03needs to keep my family's business
00:05out her mother mouth.
00:08I have no intentions of saying anything about you
00:11that's negative whatsoever.
00:13Likewise.
00:13None.
00:14Yeah, and I feel that.
00:16Can we just end right there?
00:17And I feel that.
00:18I hope you know it's genuine.
00:21You know, it's torn.
00:22It's actually my gun, brother.
00:24Trish has told me that he's interested
00:26and might take him up on the offer.
00:28How do you feel about that?
00:30I mean, what can I say, right?
00:31I just hit the baby.
00:33You're being forthcoming, so I appreciate that.
00:35And I bless that.
00:37Trish trying to hook up Destiny and Twan.
00:40Did you hit the baby?
00:42No, I didn't.
00:43Your relationship is with Ken.
00:44Y'all are the two adults.
00:45At the end of the day, you have to have
00:47a communicative relationship with that man.
00:50The key is, y'all have a conversation with later.
00:52I'll take that one.
00:54This relationship, bro.
00:55I think ultimately, bro, I'm just fed up.
00:57If she doesn't get the help this needs,
00:59I'm out.
01:01We keep it moving.
01:04All day, all night, yeah.
01:07Ain't no stopping, I'm trapped at.
01:10We ain't stopping.
01:12You know, you know.
01:15I can get it done.
01:18We keep it moving.
01:18We keep it moving.
01:20We keep it moving.
01:21We keep it moving.
01:23We keep it moving.
01:24All day, all night, yeah.
01:25Yeah.
01:26All day, all night, yeah.
01:27Yeah.
01:28Ain't no stopping us.
01:32Yeah.
01:37Put it all in the vine just to get to the gold.
01:39Parts out for the world like a UFO.
01:41Thought I would have never made it, but you ain't know.
01:44I can get it done.
01:45Ain't no way I can't go.
01:47Ground.
01:49Up.
01:51Ground.
01:52Up.
01:53One more.
01:54Ground.
01:55Up.
01:56All right.
01:57Keep going.
01:58Keep going.
01:59Come on.
02:00Push it.
02:01One more.
02:02Squeeze through the chest.
02:03Push it.
02:05Push it.
02:06Push it.
02:07Lock it.
02:08So I've been training Xavier for quite a while now,
02:13and I'm glad we're getting this session in,
02:15because there's been a lot of tension in the house,
02:16and I just want to know where he is mentally.
02:18If anything, I want to work on my leg more,
02:20even more muscle, especially on this leg,
02:23because this one's still kind of stronger.
02:25Then that leg?
02:26Yeah.
02:27So we can do legs together.
02:28I also want to do more core workouts.
02:30Obliques?
02:31You want some obliques?
02:32I want some obliques.
02:33You didn't even got a waist.
02:34What you mean?
02:35Your waist is about this small.
02:38I really eat tiny.
02:39Yeah, it is.
02:40Your waist is this small.
02:41Your body goes like a Dorito.
02:43That's how your body is like a Dorito.
02:45You got to eat a lot of protein.
02:48That protein powder.
02:49I'm trying to eat more.
02:51Yeah.
02:52You got to eat more of the right stuff.
02:53Yeah.
02:54You been okay?
02:55I'm feeling all right.
02:57You sure?
02:58Yeah.
02:59Positive?
03:00Because, you know, people say they okay all the time.
03:03I do it all the time and don't really be okay.
03:05So I just want to make sure you were okay.
03:09Like, we hadn't really sat down and talked about all the, really all the chaos that's been going on, but didn't get to see how you really felt.
03:21You know, it's honestly kind of a lot.
03:24I would say I've been trying to, I guess, distract myself more, is what I say.
03:34Distract yourself more for?
03:37Just not letting my, um, my thoughts go on a deep end.
03:44Trying to focus.
03:45Trying to focus on my future.
03:50I don't want to be depressed, I guess, as in deep end.
03:55I have probably, you know, I don't cry a lot, but probably have cried probably like twice.
04:00So when I mean deep end, I just don't want to be sad.
04:05I don't want to just stay sad.
04:08It's been a lot of, uh, fighting.
04:11Not even just between you and dad, but also between you and Ken too.
04:17Yeah.
04:18Yes, it has.
04:20Co-parenting with two narcissists?
04:21Oh!
04:22Bro, y'all, you learn the narcissist's word and just...
04:25Bro, you're a bomb!
04:26Don't say the bond are you in now.
04:28Oh, I'm sober.
04:29Are you sure?
04:30I'm positive.
04:31Because now you're feeling a bunch of bullshit.
04:32Trish, you should really be ashamed of how you doing my son and my daughter right now.
04:36How?
04:37Hey, hey, one and a half minute.
04:39One and a half minute.
04:40Get it, yo, get it, get it.
04:41Stop!
04:42Oh my gosh!
04:45Y'all gotta be fucked up!
04:48Um...
04:49Honestly, Ken's a cool guy.
04:54Ken is very nice and I appreciate him for a lot of stuff.
04:58I know it's been hard for Ken so I've been trying to...
05:01When I talk to him, I just be like, it's gonna be good.
05:04Stay positive.
05:05I don't know.
05:06I honestly, I just hate to see people that, you know, I care about.
05:10Fight.
05:11Say hurtful things.
05:12Say mean things.
05:14Really try to act like y'all hate each other.
05:17And I just like, none of y'all.
05:19Like, y'all don't...
05:20Nobody hate each other, man.
05:21You know, I don't like...
05:22I don't like any of that.
05:24And you, like I said, you're not the only one.
05:26I tell dad the same thing.
05:28Yeah.
05:29Like, you...
05:30There's just some stuff you should just not be saying at all.
05:33And it does, that's it.
05:35That's the thing I'm trying to distract myself from.
05:37Cause it really does hurt me.
05:39I do not like any negative words towards you.
05:43I don't like it towards my dad.
05:45I don't like any of that.
05:46So, that's just been the only thing that's just been...
05:50Kinda eating at me, but...
05:52At some point in time, I felt like I couldn't really talk to you.
05:57Yeah, see?
05:58That's crazy.
06:00Yeah.
06:01Really, all it takes is communication.
06:03Like, y'all, we need to just talk it through.
06:05Mm-hmm.
06:06I feel like Kent also is kinda going just through a little bit.
06:09Cause he's have to...
06:11He's had to do a little bit and...
06:13You're right.
06:14Cause we'd be already on edge.
06:16So, it's just saying...
06:17I agree.
06:18You're right, son.
06:19You're definitely right.
06:22So, hearing from Xavier that...
06:25When Kent and I fight, it really hurts him.
06:27Really bothers me and hurts me a lot.
06:30Um...
06:31Like, a lot.
06:32So, I feel like there's something I need to fix.
06:34Something I need to do.
06:36Um, to make this family better to where it was in the beginning.
06:39So, I think it's time Kent and I have a talk.
06:41I am going to do everything possible in my power to make sure.
06:45I'm going to be able to back up and get back to our fun and happy selves.
06:48I'm going to always have your back.
06:50Yeah.
06:51Always.
06:54Thank you, ma'am.
06:55You know, I always got your back too.
06:57Don't even worry about it.
06:58Don't even worry about it.
06:59Oh, you're just my type.
07:00My type.
07:01My type.
07:02My type.
07:03My type.
07:04My type.
07:05My type.
07:06My type.
07:07My type.
07:08My type.
07:09My type.
07:10My type.
07:11My type.
07:12My type.
07:13My type.
07:14My type.
07:15My type.
07:16My type.
07:17My type.
07:18My type.
07:19My type.
07:20My type.
07:21This place is dusty.
07:24This thing is nasty.
07:27Look, oh lord, how mercy good.
07:29What is you doing up there?
07:31You won't do it.
07:32I gotta do it.
07:33Damn.
07:34You all up in there.
07:35I'm glad I got tops on.
07:37How long I been asking you to do this?
07:39Like, seriously.
07:40Please, please, please.
07:41Come on down.
07:42Jump down.
07:43You gonna finish it for me?
07:44Yeah, I'll finish it.
07:45Come on, get you something to drink.
07:46Oh, you know what?
07:47You can hire my maid back.
07:50As usual, I have to do all the chores around the house.
07:55Why do we need to hire the housekeeper?
07:56I can do what the housekeeper does.
08:01You're not.
08:02What the hell you mean?
08:03I can.
08:04You're not a good.
08:05You're not a good replacement for the housekeeper.
08:08Oh, man.
08:09I heard my damn housekeeper back.
08:10Oh, this is nice.
08:12And standing here with you in a minute.
08:14I know.
08:15So, I was boxing with Twan and Lance.
08:19Apparently, I don't know, Destiny's interested in dating Twan.
08:25Wait a minute.
08:28Say what?
08:29You heard me.
08:30Get the out of here.
08:32You heard me.
08:33Nope.
08:34I don't got some Lance friend.
08:35Yes.
08:36Destiny wants to date him.
08:38Mm-hmm.
08:39But I said I did have a problem with it.
08:42And then Lance was like, but why?
08:44I gave Destiny my blessing.
08:48The ?
08:49That's crazy to hear.
08:50I don't know how it transpires.
08:52Well, here's how I took it.
08:53I don't know what the hell Lance got going on with Destiny.
08:57But it's kind of, to me, it's almost like he feels a sense of, is it guilt?
09:03Is that the right word?
09:04Um, I wouldn't want to say guilt for him.
09:07Is that something really that Destiny wants to do?
09:10Or is Destiny pulling a, like, a page out of Martell's book?
09:16Like, being petty?
09:17You know what I'm saying?
09:18Oh, okay.
09:19So, you're going to have a, you're going to go and have a child.
09:21You say you didn't know, but you're going to go have a child.
09:23Then I'm going to go date your friend.
09:25You know, that's petty .
09:28So, yeah.
09:29Um, but anyway, I met with Destiny to see where we stand.
09:35Oh, her re-evaluating your relationship.
09:38Yeah, exactly.
09:39She felt some type of way about Letitia Scott telling her that I knew that Lance had a child on the way.
09:52Letitia told Destiny this?
09:54Yes.
09:56Letitia told Destiny that I knew Lance had a child on the way.
10:01And that's what I told her.
10:03Well, that's, that's not true.
10:05No.
10:06Got her damn nose somewhere it don't belong.
10:09Mm-hmm.
10:10Well, you know.
10:11And telling Destiny.
10:12It's Destiny's friend, so.
10:13Yeah, you're right.
10:14It is.
10:15Considering all the things that she said has been said about hers and she do not like, Letitia should know that talking about people's families is off limits.
10:26But, um, me and Destiny, we're good where we stand.
10:32And.
10:33That's good.
10:34I think, I think we'll, I think we'll be okay.
10:36I just have to wait and see.
10:38You know, I said the same thing about me and Letitia.
10:40I thought we was going to be okay, but apparently she's still running that mouth.
10:43So, I don't really know who I'm okay with in this group, to be honest.
10:48Coming up on Love and Marriage Huntsville.
10:53I definitely need a person that can accept me for who I am.
10:57And I'm a lot of different people.
10:58For real?
10:59Yep.
11:00That's crazy.
11:01It's always how you feel, how the kids feel.
11:05Ain't nobody ever put in a conscious ever about, hey, how does Ken feel?
11:09Do you want to be here?
11:11Pretty girl swag.
11:21I got it.
11:23I got pretty girl swag.
11:27I got it.
11:29Let's go.
11:30Pay for it.
11:31Pay for it.
11:32I got pretty girl swag.
11:34I got pretty girl swag.
11:36Uh, table for two.
11:37Table for two.
11:38Today, I'm meeting Twan, who was my previous bodyguard for an event for a business luncheon.
11:44I'm very nervous.
11:45And that's not like me at all.
11:49Hello.
11:50How you doing, Miss Destin?
11:51How you doing?
11:52How you doing?
11:53Good to see you.
11:54Good to see you, too.
11:55The whole point of this luncheon is for Twan to guard my body at events.
12:00So, I invited you here because I wanted to talk business first and foremost.
12:04Okay.
12:05Things have happened in life, and I feel like as I go to more events, I probably should
12:10have somebody there for security reasons.
12:12True enough.
12:13And I felt like you were very professional.
12:15Appreciate you.
12:16You did a great job.
12:18Um, guarding my body.
12:21That's...
12:22Yeah, that's usually the plan when you step out there.
12:24Uh-huh.
12:25Uh-huh.
12:26It was an interesting event, and it was this whole thing about me making googly eyes.
12:32Yeah, what was that about anyway?
12:33Did you feel like I was making googly eyes at you?
12:35Yeah, how do you make googly eyes?
12:36I don't know.
12:37I don't know.
12:38How you do that?
12:39It's like this right there.
12:41Not like that, I hope.
12:42We was vibing.
12:43It was a vibe.
12:44It was like, I'm there for you.
12:45I wasn't there for anybody else.
12:47So, anytime you said something, I'm right there lockstep.
12:50So, uh, maybe it was me smiling.
12:52I have no idea.
12:53Why were you smiling?
12:54I mean, you're beautiful.
12:57Oh.
12:58So, you know what I mean?
12:59Well, thank you.
13:00I didn't think you were making googly eyes at me, but, I mean, at the same time, I could
13:03be wrong.
13:04I don't know.
13:05I don't know.
13:06I don't know.
13:07I don't remember.
13:08I don't know.
13:09I mean, I'm not blind.
13:11You are attractive.
13:12I appreciate you.
13:13I heard some things, and I don't know.
13:17About me?
13:18Trish has said something about, you asked about me.
13:21I don't know if that's true or not.
13:22I don't remember talking to Trish.
13:25Maybe I may have said something.
13:26I don't know.
13:27I had a conversation with Lance, and I told him, if you were interested, that I might
13:34see what it is.
13:35And then he let me know that he was your god brother.
13:37Yes, he is.
13:38I did not know that.
13:40That made that conversation very awkward.
13:43Yeah.
13:44Yeah, but he was like, oh, I'll give you your blessing if it happens.
13:47I said, but it's been nothing but professional.
13:49So, I don't even know if that's true.
13:50I'm just letting you know so you don't have to find out on the internet like I found out
13:53about your kid on the internet.
13:54Oh.
13:55Wow.
13:56It's kind of .
13:59Well, I mean, it's just the truth.
14:00Nah, for you.
14:01I had to talk with him, too.
14:02Mm-hmm.
14:03How'd it go?
14:04The conversation was interesting.
14:05I just told him, you know, we'll see.
14:07I told him that a conversation needed to be had kind of like now.
14:09Mm-hmm.
14:10So, you talked to Lance.
14:12Did you talk to my mama?
14:13You say, mama, that's like .
14:16I had to put her out there like that.
14:18I know that's probably how she just did.
14:20Your mama.
14:21If you did talk to her, I'm pretty sure she can.
14:22I did.
14:23Okay.
14:24I did talk to her.
14:25And you know, before even the whole Lance situation, me and Nell have been like this.
14:30She had a little, you know, she felt a little way.
14:33What'd she say?
14:34What didn't she say?
14:35All right.
14:36You know how she is.
14:37Uh, I do.
14:38Mama pressed me to see if me and you had had sex.
14:42Huh?
14:43Yeah.
14:44Like, that was crazy.
14:45That lady be so out of line.
14:47It's just ridiculous.
14:48Like, she need to quit worrying about people's sex life, first of all.
14:51Worried about her and Chris.
14:55But I really think that friendship, building a friendship is important first.
14:58Because, like, if I'm dating, I'm dating multiple people.
15:01Like, and again, that does not mean being intimate.
15:04Because people confuse that.
15:07Um, Miss Nell being one of them.
15:09Does that bother you, dating other people?
15:11Nah.
15:12It's just, I know how, I know how I move.
15:13Like, building friendships and everything, that makes it a whole lot easier to deal with.
15:17You know, a woman, possibly dating around or whatever.
15:21Somebody might ask you out.
15:22And I'm like, okay, cool.
15:24Yeah.
15:25I definitely need a person that can accept me for who I am.
15:28And I'm a lot of different people.
15:31That's crazy.
15:33It just turned into a horror movie.
15:34Just a thriller real quick.
15:35It's not a horror movie.
15:36Yeah, I appreciate it.
15:37No, I think, I mean, a man that is with a woman that can be different women is, that's exciting.
15:41Yeah.
15:42To a certain extent.
15:44I mean, I'm not saying they all crazy.
15:47Maybe one of them.
15:48I don't know, man.
15:49It's like, as soon as your head start turning like them, I'm like, see?
15:53What I would like to do, outside of business partners, build a friendship.
15:56This conversation, from the times I've actually done security with you, you seem like you're cool.
16:01Who would have known?
16:02I'd be sitting talking to Destiny Patton.
16:06Okay.
16:07Payton, not Patton.
16:09But I'm going to give him a pass, because I didn't even know what his name was at all for a long time.
16:13He was just a bodyguard.
16:17It's cool to get to know somebody I would have never even thought I would have had the chance to get to know.
16:22Did I tell you that you look nice?
16:26Yeah.
16:27I did?
16:28Did I tell you you look nice?
16:29You did.
16:30I did?
16:31Mm-hmm.
16:33Uh-huh.
16:37Coming up on Love and Marriage Huntsville.
16:41You know, I took your advice on, you know, Marceau.
16:44So he said that with Chad a little bit.
16:46What?
16:47We don't deserve to be mistreated because we're having negative thoughts.
16:53I don't mistreat you or do anything wrong based off of what I've got going on in my brain
16:57or what somebody done did to me five, six, seven years ago.
17:00Some years ago.
17:20So Ken and I have been taking a little cool down since our last fight.
17:23Just trying to keep our distance from each other to keep frustration down.
17:26For one, I hate to see my kids hurt.
17:28And to see Xavier hurt is like, wow.
17:32Okay.
17:33Trisha, you got to do something.
17:35So I think it's time that I have a talk with Ken.
17:38Kenny!
17:45Yes, babe?
17:50Let's talk.
17:51What's going on?
17:53Let's talk about this issue we just had.
17:56So we can get clarity on where it went left.
18:02Yeah.
18:03I definitely...
18:04I definitely think we need to have this conversation.
18:07These last few days been kinda...
18:10Stressful.
18:11Yeah.
18:12Definitely stressful.
18:13I know we talk about all the things I need to work on.
18:15And this...
18:17This wall it seems like I have built up.
18:21I don't think no true effort has been put into actually making the proper changes that we need for our relationship to go forward.
18:30I think just lingers around.
18:32We talk about it.
18:33It just lingers and lingers and lingers.
18:35And two months done went past and ain't nothing happened.
18:38I ultimately have no control.
18:40And when I don't have no control over my life, I don't like that.
18:43Do you want to be here?
18:50I was actually wanting to leave.
18:53Like, it's been...
18:54It's that stressful.
18:55It's been that stressful for me.
18:56But at the end of the day, there has to be a change in regards to the way I feel, the way people treat me, the things that are said to me.
19:06Like, it's always how you feel, how the kids feel.
19:10Ain't nobody ever put in a conscious effort about, hey, how does Ken feel?
19:17When I'm angry, when I'm frustrated, when I'm mad, y'all still get the same amount of type of love.
19:22When you're frustrated, you're angry, and you're mad, y'all might not even eat that day.
19:27Y'all don't even... Y'all won't even talk to me most of the time.
19:30And that sucks. And a lot of the times, that don't be having nothing to do with me.
19:34I don't mistreat you or do anything wrong based off of what I've got going on in my brain
19:39or what somebody done did to me five, six, seven years ago.
19:43Ken, sometimes you will reflect off the energy like it does have something to do with you.
19:48And sometimes I just be quiet in a zone just thinking about life.
19:52I don't even be having an attitude sometimes. Sometimes I just talk.
19:55But sometimes you will take it as an attitude.
19:57Bro, we been past that.
19:58I'm talking about the actual... when the actual anger does come out.
20:03When you actually snapping at people.
20:06Those are the moments where we have those disagreements.
20:08That's because the energy in the house has changed.
20:10Because of you. That's the thing.
20:11No, but sometimes it be just because I just be sitting there quiet.
20:14Okay.
20:15And then I come off, oh, she's mad or something.
20:17No, I'm just thinking.
20:19We don't deserve to be mistreated because we're having negative thoughts.
20:24You know what I'm saying? I can't do that.
20:26So we have to be able to control our emotions.
20:29We have to be able to, even when we're having those emotions, be able to operate in them in a positive way.
20:35We have to control our aggressions.
20:37So what do we, what, what, what happens from here? Because like I said, even now, like right now, like we can't have, it's, we, it's, even in this conversation, it's showing that we can't have the conversation without it being a back and forth.
20:54I think a lot of the frustrations in our relationship stem from things that I have nothing to do with. And I think your personal trauma shouldn't be allowed to determine the way you treat other people.
21:05What fueled you to be like in the gym so heavy?
21:08Anger.
21:11I think I was mad at the world.
21:12I was mad at life.
21:13I was, you know, mad at life that was taken from me.
21:16Yeah, my mom and dad passed seven months apart.
21:19My sister passed in my hands.
21:21Zarya sitting there watching me, trying to pump life into her.
21:24I'm trying to pump life into her.
21:25I'm trying to pump life into her.
21:26So it was, it was hard.
21:27Sophie.
21:29I'm sorry, Trish.
21:31When I disappeared, I disappeared from the world.
21:34I think I disappeared from myself.
21:36And I understand what Trish has went through in her past.
21:39And I'm trying so hard to kind of continue to be patient.
21:43But if she doesn't get the help and the proper therapy that she needs, yeah, it's probably definitely not going to work for us.
21:49Okay, so where do we start?
21:51What do, like, what steps do we need to take?
21:57It has to be some change as far as, like, therapy.
22:05I mean, I think I've been pretty damn patient with this .
22:08It's been three years.
22:09But that's something that you have to take the lead on.
22:12I personally, man, I can't keep getting beat over the head for some I ain't do.
22:16I can't go another six months going through this .
22:20If there's no actions taking place, it's not going to change.
22:27Coming up on Love & Marriage Huntsville.
22:29I want to thank you for being willing to trust me, a total stranger, with the private parts of your life.
22:39Who is Trisha?
22:41I think I'm, I don't know, a very angry soul right now.
22:44There is a difference between an angry person and an angry soul.
22:58You're welcome, Gary.
23:10Good stuff.
23:13Hey.
23:15Hey, man.
23:17You like it now?
23:18Yeah, what are you up to?
23:20Trying to see what the kids are doing.
23:23Like stuff they completed, like their work, and if it's on time.
23:27Some, uh, Lance Riley made it.
23:30Oh, my God.
23:31Yeah, I really don't want to go out there.
23:34I'm kind of like trying to let him do his thing.
23:36Come on, let's check it out and see what he doing.
23:38Because I'm sure there's some more to be done.
23:41And you might want to tell him why he has the guys here so they hear it and he hears it too.
23:45Lance has finally stopped by the daycare to squeeze his sweet mother in, get some work done.
23:51Considering that he's giving me a discount, I think that's why I get put on a back burner.
23:57I'm not paying for a price like the rest of his customers.
24:04But he need to complete my job soon.
24:06I just want to make sure everything's going to be right.
24:09I want to make sure I'm going to have my trimming around here.
24:12I want to make sure you're going to paint that back blue.
24:14We'll wipe it down first, then paint it back blue.
24:16This is going to be sanded down really well.
24:19Run it smooth, of course.
24:20Right.
24:21And then paint it.
24:22How long is it going to take to actually get this done?
24:25This will take me two full-on nights.
24:27I can't say days.
24:28Of course, we've got to work at night, right?
24:29Okay.
24:29So in two days, we'll knock this out.
24:33You need to step up here.
24:33What up?
24:34What up?
24:35What's up, Marty Marr?
24:36What's up there?
24:36Now, where's the walls, man?
24:37You can't go in here.
24:38I ain't going to touch them.
24:38What's happening there?
24:39I saw y'all cars out here.
24:40I saw them and stuff about how to show.
24:42You working, too?
24:43I'm in here giving orders.
24:45You know, it's my business.
24:46Lance, well, you do everything.
24:47That's what I'm talking about.
24:48What you doing up here?
24:49What's happening?
24:50Ah, good scene.
24:51Popping up over at the investment property?
24:53Oh, I think maybe, you know.
24:54You and Marceau have been acting.
24:56I thought maybe you wanted to come by this daycare.
25:00Well, he and me right here behind me, then.
25:02How's it going for you, the investment property?
25:04Moving my old lady in there.
25:05Oh, okay.
25:06So Arion gonna move in there?
25:08Yeah.
25:08Her and the kids, yeah.
25:09Okay.
25:10Yeah.
25:11All right.
25:11Yeah.
25:12So you ain't making no profit enough.
25:15No.
25:16You ain't making no profit.
25:18You got Arion in there.
25:19Oh, hey, really, because I've been paying that rent forever.
25:24I ain't got no mortgage.
25:26Oh, so you paying the rent where she at now?
25:29Yeah.
25:29Oh, hell yeah.
25:30Move my ass in.
25:31I said I'm winning, winning right now.
25:33God dang it.
25:34Yeah.
25:35Oh, yeah, that makes sense.
25:36Yeah.
25:36I'm going to get in here with my team.
25:38Look.
25:38All right, finish my work first.
25:39That's why I'm here.
25:41You know, I took your advice on meeting up with Marceau.
25:44So we said that with Chad a little bit.
25:46Yeah, man.
25:47Was it like a...
25:49We came to...
25:50Positive?
25:51Very positive.
25:52You know, he tried to do a lot of talking,
25:56but I think that was the first time I ever out-talked him.
25:59Oh, really?
26:00What?
26:00I...
26:01Damn.
26:02Really?
26:02I out-talked him.
26:03Did you have a drink?
26:05I did not.
26:05He was over there trying to look pretty with a cigar.
26:09I was straight there just...
26:10Did he look pretty?
26:10Yeah, he tried, but...
26:12But at the end, you know, we came to an agreement.
26:16We don't talk negative about each other,
26:18nor our significant others.
26:20So that's the agreement we got, you know?
26:25I mean, I guess as time progressed,
26:27we'll just see how the relationship builds, though.
26:29You know what I'm saying?
26:30That's the agreement.
26:30That's a hell of a agreement.
26:32No, I mean, it's doable.
26:34But that's just between you and Marceau, right?
26:37I can see that.
26:38Yeah.
26:39Arion and Letitia haven't talked.
26:40They haven't.
26:41It's gonna...
26:42Females are different.
26:43That's what I'm saying.
26:44So my thing is, hopefully Marceau and I
26:46will be able to see eye to eye.
26:48Eye to eye, yes.
26:49And if or when Tisha and Arion do talk,
26:53I mean, if they do have their words,
26:55we're there to, you know...
26:56Diffuse the situation.
26:57Yeah, diffuse it and calm them down, you know?
26:59But that's good.
27:00Y'all did come to a happy medium, I would say.
27:03Yeah, yeah.
27:04So to hear that Martel has made up with the Scots,
27:08um, is very huge.
27:10I know because I've had my problems with them
27:13and they all are stubborn as hell,
27:16even Martel.
27:17So for me, I'm pretty impressed.
27:20If that's the case, then I feel like maybe...
27:22Maybe we should do something else,
27:23get the group together,
27:24something to maybe have some fun...
27:26Some fun activities.
27:28No, so we don't want to start no more drama.
27:30So I'm happy that, you know,
27:31Marceau and I, that we're okay.
27:34But, you know,
27:36there's a lot of issues still going on amongst the group.
27:38Ken, his old lady,
27:40Nell, and Tisha.
27:43I'm just happy they need it.
27:44Play some adult games,
27:45some type of adult games or something.
27:46Adult games as in sexual type?
27:48Not that kind.
27:49Regular games, you know,
27:51a type of...
27:52Yeah, a car game or...
27:53Oh, okay, okay.
27:54There's nothing too challenging
27:55that's gonna get people all riled up.
27:56Right.
27:57It's just fun.
27:57It's not gonna have a lot of fun.
27:59Well, I'm about to get up out of here
28:00and I guess I'll be seeing y'all at game night.
28:03Game night, bro.
28:04Y'all put it on.
28:05It's gonna be sooner than later.
28:05Oh, we'll put it...
28:06Yeah, we're gonna do it.
28:07For sure, for sure.
28:07I'm gonna do it. Give me a hug.
28:08All right.
28:09Are you gonna talk to Tisha?
28:12About what?
28:13Whatever y'all got going on.
28:15I ain't got going on.
28:16That's just the game.
28:17Oh, it's just her?
28:17The only thing I said
28:18is she need to keep my name
28:19out of her mouth.
28:21That's the same thing
28:22that I've been tripping on to
28:23five years.
28:24Martell has actually
28:26made up with Marceau
28:28and they both pretty damn messy.
28:32So now we just have to see
28:34what happens next.
28:35You ain't talking about your
28:36you ain't talking about mine.
28:37That's real easy.
28:39That's very easy.
28:40Don't be scared
28:40to put your out there.
28:42Exactly.
28:42Because if you don't,
28:43I am.
28:44What's that?
28:44Side chick number two coming.
28:46Tell you if y'all want to.
28:49Coming up on
28:50Love and Mary's Huntsville.
28:51Do you know it takes
28:52strength to grieve?
28:54And if you don't do
28:54your grief work,
28:55people who are dependent on you,
28:57then they don't get the opportunity
28:59to get close to you.
29:01I don't want to get close
29:02to people when we lose them.
29:12I don't like resurfacing
29:26any pain, anger, sadness,
29:29thoughts, memories, any of that.
29:32I just like to keep it bottled up.
29:34But I do recognize
29:36that there are things
29:38that I need to fix
29:39when I get angry
29:40because that's a pattern
29:42I want to break.
29:46Good evening.
29:48Good evening.
29:48Welcome.
29:50Thanks.
29:51You look a little bit
29:52shaken there,
29:53but it's going to be all right.
29:54Please have a seat
29:55right over here, guys.
29:57Okay.
29:58Oh.
29:59My name is Kitson Francis.
30:01I'm Trisha.
30:02Trisha.
30:03All right.
30:03I want to thank you
30:06for being willing
30:07to trust me,
30:08a total stranger,
30:09with the private parts
30:12of your life,
30:13you know,
30:14and we're going to
30:15work our way through this.
30:17All right?
30:18Where would you like to start?
30:20I just feel like the last...
30:21You feel like...
30:24The last 10,
30:2612 years' life
30:26has just been
30:29a rollercoaster going down.
30:32How would you describe
30:36this emotional rollercoaster?
30:38I think it all started
30:39when I lost my parents
30:42and my sister.
30:45First, it was...
30:47I don't know.
30:48I was just angry with life
30:50because family kind of...
30:53kind of fell apart.
30:54We were very, very close.
30:57The whole family...
30:58Well, when they were here.
31:04How many siblings you had?
31:07It's five of us.
31:09Five?
31:10Out of all people
31:12who were left,
31:13who's the leader?
31:18I would say me.
31:20I don't know.
31:20I guess I think
31:22all of us felt lost.
31:23All of us felt lost when?
31:28When we lost my dad.
31:30It was like we...
31:31I don't know.
31:32It was like we...
31:33We lost our drill sergeant.
31:35You lost your drill sergeant?
31:36It was...
31:37But, you know,
31:37but, but,
31:38but, Chish, you know,
31:39you know,
31:39you know, drill sergeants
31:40are not always nice style.
31:41They take care of
31:42at 5 o'clock in the morning
31:43and do all kinds of things.
31:44Well, he was.
31:45He did.
31:45He did, huh?
31:46Right.
31:47He was retired military.
31:48Oh.
31:49He was our everything.
31:50And how close were you
31:53to your dad?
31:58Well.
32:03Very.
32:04Very?
32:05My dad was actually
32:06my best friend.
32:08Are you like your dad?
32:11Oh, yeah.
32:11I try to be.
32:12I always want to be
32:12like that guy.
32:14I think we all did.
32:16What if I told you
32:17that you succeeded
32:18in that,
32:19in doing that?
32:20As much as I love my dad,
32:23I think a part of my anger
32:25comes from him, too.
32:30Are you willing
32:30to talk about that part?
32:34I feel like
32:35he tried to teach us
32:38all these rules in life
32:40and how to be
32:43great people
32:45and
32:47represent him
32:50in the world
32:51and
32:51everything.
32:52It's just
32:53I didn't understand
32:56until I got older
32:57and do as I say
32:58and not as I do.
33:00He didn't follow
33:01what he was trying
33:02to teach us
33:03and tell us.
33:05Otherwise,
33:06he would still be here.
33:07Oh, he didn't follow.
33:10It angers me sometimes.
33:12How did you let him
33:12know you were angry?
33:13I didn't
33:14I didn't process
33:16all of it
33:16until he was gone.
33:21Like, why didn't you
33:22I don't know.
33:28If you knew that
33:29while he was
33:30alive,
33:31did you ask him
33:33then?
33:34No, but I would have.
33:35I didn't think about it then.
33:37How are you feeling
33:38about you
33:39not asking him
33:40then
33:40as you're
33:41sitting right here?
33:43It's part of failure
33:44that I think about.
33:46Part of failure?
33:50So what does it feel
33:51like then
33:52for you
33:52to be the one
33:54that they are
33:54dependent on?
33:55I'm okay with it.
34:04It's just
34:04I'm okay
34:08with being strong
34:09for everyone.
34:10It's
34:10I think I'm
34:12I don't know
34:12a very angry soul
34:13right now.
34:14You're angry?
34:15My grief turns
34:16to anger.
34:17That's the problem.
34:18When your grief
34:19turns to anger
34:20what do you do
34:20with the anger?
34:21Where do you put it?
34:22How do you act it out?
34:23I go to the gym.
34:24And when you go
34:25to the gym
34:26I redirect my pain.
34:29You redirect your pain?
34:31From mental to physical.
34:32From mental to physical.
34:34So how many days
34:35do you go to the gym?
34:36Every day.
34:37Every day.
34:38Ooh.
34:39So
34:40so when you're done
34:42at the gym
34:43how do you feel?
34:46Exhausted
34:47tired
34:48sometimes.
34:49And then
34:49you either go back
34:51to it in the morning
34:51or you take it home
34:52with you.
34:53Which one do you do?
34:54Sometimes
34:57it comes back
34:59home with me.
35:00It comes back
35:01home with you.
35:02You know why
35:02it comes back
35:03home with you?
35:04Because there is
35:05a difference
35:05between
35:06externalizing
35:07putting something
35:08out
35:08touching things
35:09moving some ways
35:10but it's
35:13always
35:14here.
35:17So you really
35:18don't leave it
35:18at the gym.
35:19What you do
35:20is to go
35:20act out
35:21your bitterness
35:22at the gym
35:23and because
35:25the gym
35:26does not have
35:26a way
35:27of arguing
35:28with you
35:28it's a safe
35:29place
35:30for you
35:31to act out
35:32this anger.
35:35there is
35:36there is
35:36a difference
35:37between
35:37an angry
35:37person
35:38and angry
35:39soul.
35:40Why?
35:41Because a person
35:42can be anything
35:42out here
35:43but your soul
35:44is like
35:44right
35:45inside of here
35:46and this
35:47is where
35:48your anger
35:48is like
35:49right inside
35:50of here
35:50and so
35:53let's go ahead
35:57and just
35:58take your time.
36:15There is a difference
36:16between an angry
36:17person
36:18and an angry
36:19soul
36:19and so
36:22let's go ahead
36:27and just
36:27take your time.
36:44Okay.
36:49I'm just angry
36:50and tired.
36:52There are reasons
36:53why
36:54you are tired
36:56why you are angry
36:58and that's what
36:59we are looking for.
37:00I know.
37:01I guess life
37:02happens
37:02just a lot.
37:05Do you know
37:05it takes strength
37:06to breathe?
37:06it takes a lot of
37:14not just your strength
37:15but your weakness
37:16not you.
37:20The strength
37:21and weakness
37:21is saying
37:22I know
37:25who I am
37:26I want to do something
37:29I want to do something
37:29I don't have the strength
37:31to do it
37:31so I need a spotter.
37:33So you're in the gym
37:34right
37:34and you want to
37:36increase your strength
37:37and your power
37:38and you need a spotter
37:40they help you out
37:42in case you can't lift it.
37:44Well
37:45I thought I had a spotter
37:47he didn't turn out
37:48to be a spotter
37:49he turned out
37:51to be a part
37:52of the lost
37:52pain
37:53and the grief.
37:55My spotter
37:56was supposed to be
37:57my ex
37:57Marquez
37:58but obviously
38:00he let the weights
38:01fall on me
38:01so
38:03I just
38:05tend to just
38:05try it on my own.
38:07If you don't do
38:08your grief work
38:09people who are
38:09dependent on you
38:11to see your
38:12humane side
38:14that soft side
38:15if people never
38:16get to see that
38:17they have a picture
38:18of you
38:18and then when
38:19they don't help you
38:20and they
38:21because they think
38:21they don't have to
38:22you might go away
38:23thinking that people
38:24don't help you.
38:25Why were you
38:25creating that?
38:26And they don't
38:27get the opportunity
38:28to get close to you.
38:31Yeah I don't like
38:32getting close to people.
38:33You don't like
38:34getting close to people?
38:36I don't like to deal with
38:37I don't want to
38:38get close to people
38:39and lose them.
38:41yes
38:42the degree of
38:43attachment
38:44that you have
38:45with a person
38:46will determine
38:47the degree of
38:48loss
38:48and pain
38:49you go through
38:50when they are
38:50no longer available
38:51and you just
38:52basically came
38:53all the way
38:53back around
38:54and said
38:54yes
38:55that's what it is.
38:57It's definitely
38:58harder
38:59opening up
39:00in my relationship
39:02now
39:02because
39:03I don't know
39:04I guess I just
39:05lost that trust
39:05in people.
39:08And here
39:09is the big thing
39:10that I'm going
39:10to ask you
39:11to do
39:11if you can
39:12accomplish this
39:12you would have
39:13accomplished a whole lot
39:14it's very simple
39:15it's going to require you
39:18to
39:19trust yourself
39:21to trust
39:23somebody
39:25that you are
39:26emotionally close to
39:27we're going to have to
39:30have some role
39:31reversal
39:31right here
39:32so that they can
39:33or you will allow
39:35them to take care
39:36of you
39:36then you will
39:38begin to see
39:39the strength
39:42that lies in
39:44what you think
39:46is weakness
39:47you're being
39:51very strong
39:52right now
39:53when you don't
39:53have to be
39:54maybe
39:55I don't know
39:56so Dr. Francis
39:58suggests that I
40:00allow more people
40:01to support me more
40:02maybe if I learn
40:03to lean on
40:04Ken and my family
40:05instead of
40:05doing it all
40:06by myself
40:06I'll be less
40:08likely to lash
40:09out and be
40:09angry at everyone
40:10but it's hard
40:11when I'm so used
40:12to helping
40:13and not receiving
40:14the help
40:14thank you
40:15for you to trust
40:17me with
40:18all of
40:19as much as you did
40:21it was hard
40:22it was hard
40:24next on
40:27Love and Marriage
40:28Huntsville
40:29Ken
40:29he moved
40:30he stepped away
40:31for a little while
40:31I hope that you
40:34trying to be
40:35more vulnerable
40:36with him
40:36Destiny said
40:40you said
40:41keep my
40:41mean out of your mouth
40:42I did say that
40:43hello
40:46so Nell
40:51why did you guys
40:52leave LA early
40:53that's none of your
40:56business
40:57I don't owe you
40:57anything
40:58how much y'all know
40:59about Destiny
41:00good wholesome girl
41:01good wholesome girl
41:02yeah
41:03that's not what I want
41:04to hear
41:04no
41:05oh what you want to hear
41:07that's not
41:07CC down for the call
41:08tonight
41:09you got the one night
41:10to prove you're worth
41:11hey Nell
41:13let me tell you something
41:14I dump your ass
41:15in that pool
41:16you keep hollin' at me
41:17let me tell you something
41:18you Nell
41:19keep hollin' at me
41:22keep hollin' at me
41:23you
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