- 2 days ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Hi, would you like to talk to me about God?
00:02God, God, God, God, God.
00:04The order says women will be fulfilled by making their home their work.
00:06Have you personally found that?
00:08No.
00:09But I've only been doing it 17 years.
00:11I provide for my family.
00:15I chose David.
00:17And you'd choose me again today.
00:19I chose David.
00:21Who are those guys?
00:22They're off to hell.
00:23Wow, nice eight pack.
00:25Yeah.
00:26I used to be in the order.
00:27I'm making an official request under the charter to return.
00:29Are you wearing Mary's ring?
00:31Oh.
00:32It's a bit bad.
00:33Mary!
00:34Remain in the order on penance or pursue university and be excluded.
00:42Hey.
00:43Hey, guys.
00:44Wait.
00:45Hey.
00:46Did you just come from anatomy?
00:48Yeah.
00:49Incredible, right?
00:50The design of the human body.
00:52And also we can save lives.
00:54But do you know what's even better than saving lives?
00:56A fulfilling relationship with Jesus Christ.
00:58Oh, God.
00:59Please take a leaflet.
01:00Oh, good try, Rachel.
01:01Yeah, I thought you were really bonding until she learnt your whole deal.
01:07It's crazy to think, isn't it, if the chips had fallen differently, you could have been one of those students instead of harassing them with leaflets.
01:13Am I done?
01:14Yes.
01:15Yes.
01:16300 hours of penance.
01:17Actually, you finished 45 minutes ago.
01:19I just let you keep going because you were clearly having so much fun.
01:22How do you feel?
01:23Feel renewed.
01:24Full of purpose.
01:25Aw.
01:26I can tell you really mean that.
01:27Thanks for that, Jesus.
01:28Rachel, you're off penance.
01:29I'm making you a flan to celebrate.
01:30And I'm overbeating the eggs so it doesn't go to your head.
01:31I'm going to go and pray.
01:32Nobody interrupt me.
01:33Aaron, you don't think your sister's spirit is broken, do you?
01:38Not broken.
01:39Of course maybe.
01:40Rachel, you're all done, right?
01:41Yes.
01:42Thumbs up.
01:43Big thumbs up.
01:44Hm.
01:45It's up tonight.
01:46What are you doing?
01:47My definitely not done.
01:48What are you doing?
01:49It's hard.
01:50I'm doing a job.
01:51What are you doing?
01:52I'm doing a job.
01:53What are you doing?
01:54I do.
01:55I do.
01:56I do.
01:57I do.
01:58I do.
01:59I do.
02:00I'm doing a job.
02:01I do.
02:02I do.
02:03Yeah, I work.
02:04Thanks.
02:05Hey, a baby.
02:06big thumbs up hmm something smells like cotton candy
02:13your gel pens of course you kids and your gel pens
02:20right well i'll leave you to it
02:27something i needed to
02:27nope it's gone bye rachel
02:51land back in church isn't that great happy day celebration yes
02:57it's been great being treated like a virus no one said virus samson said i would infect
03:03everyone with sin yes but you stayed at home and you didn't rachel i know it's been tough but
03:08penance is designed to renew your faith short mum but 300 hours of preaching who would seriously
03:14feel renewed by that is that the boy who did play with you he kissed me that's what i said he looks
03:24so committed a changed man he's the reason i was on penance he told on me to samson well thank
03:32goodness he brought you back to the light thank you for bringing my daughter back to the light
03:38blessings blessings
03:42andrew saw mental health leave i wish we didn't call it that his wife tree died his convert shamed him
03:48his brain broke he's the only elder who can moderate samson with him gone well i don't think andrew's
03:53absence will make any real difference arranged marriages why did we stop doing them
04:04i don't remember either so i'm bringing them back
04:07samson has spoken i'm not doing it no way before you rule this out rachel think of the peer pressure
04:18if you don't do it you'll look weird what happened to letting me live my own life nothing happened to
04:22it it's never been a thing david why don't you go and get some squash oh thanks fiona i'm squashed up
04:27to the nines go over there david yes of course rachel i accept this is a bit of a surprise but
04:34try to see the positives who in their right mind would feel positive about this wow and wow
04:43mrs abijah could be in this room right now i mean maybe it's that lady
04:50no it's not that lady didn't know i'm so keen to get married i'm not no i mean i mean i've dabbled
04:55with a couple of christian dating apps you know adam and eve dating righteous relationships marriage
05:00messiah prodigal passion project tabernacle time devotion motion and kringle but i'm not keen no
05:06uh elder my card doesn't have any names on it just the word atone
05:13i mean i thought i have the tones i handed out some flyers a 14 year old spat at me publicly
05:18fornicated with an unmarried woman there's only one way to cleanse that stain is that
05:25a padlock next well if it isn't erin lewis aren't you a bit too young to be paired off with your
05:31future wife i see you've matched everyone male to female and only male to female our charter doesn't
05:39explicitly forbid gay marriage no but i do next all right joshua thanks dad uh i mean elder can i get a
05:51abijah's card too i can't seem to find that one okay but he does have a card though right if he gets
05:55married he'd have children an unpollinated flower bears no seed joshua are you trying to end his
06:03genetic line next i can't believe you're forcing me into this i'm not forcing you you're welcome
06:08to resist for a bit look your father and i were married in this system it's the lord's way of guiding
06:14us to our soulmates do you really think dad's your soulmate that of everyone else on earth there's no
06:19one better suited to you you honestly believe that yes because god always puts our soulmate
06:27in our paths hello hiya i'm just de-diluting the squash is that a three to one water squash ratio
06:40i like my squash quite viscous i thought i was the only one nice soup machine washable never trusted dry
06:48cleaners dry cleaners a misnomer that means water free not liquid free precisely they were being
06:53accurate it would be called anhydrous cleaning what did you say your name was david david my god's
07:03eternal king known for his good looks and his illicit dalliance with bathsheba
07:10i should get back to my wife oh don't forget your squash
07:26how about you who's that lady that's maude new in from the press witch chapter she made big waves at
07:32their homemakers club that woman knows how to make cheese from scratch
07:40oh three to one too rich for my blood
07:46uh sister lewis susie left a letter for you miss simmons did i'm quite envious actually because the
07:52only thing she sent me is a picture of her new boyfriend smeared in um edible love chocolate and
07:59she told me she was lactose intolerant i guess uh not for him
08:07rachel i've taken a job at a lovely scottish school that doesn't do proper background checks
08:13but i thought before i go i'd leave you a heartfelt letter like we're in little women or something
08:18god i hated that film it taught little girls that they can be anything and we both know that just isn't
08:23true i'm sorry you didn't get to study medicine at university i'm sure you would have been a great
08:28doctor until you burned out at 35 but here's a leaflet for a paramedic course it would mean using
08:34your mind to help people and from your volunteering you already have valuable experience in getting
08:40paid badly good luck rachel i'll stay in touch if i remember big if p.s how's joshua he sounded really
08:48lame and perfect for you still no update on when i'm gonna be moving out no i do have an update uh
08:57your dad still doesn't want you but the good news is you can live here indefinitely i'm very happy with
09:04our system alternating nights between bed and bag makes you appreciate bed so much more yeah
09:10oh and by the way i think we have rats yeah i saw a trail of breadcrumbs leading to a rat yeah
09:23take that dummy not dummy fiona david the smacks floor better when you picture david i'm not actually
09:29angry at david today apart from the normal background hub it's rachel who's being tricky she's resisting
09:35courtship courtship sounds weird and medieval why are we friends it's just a process where young
09:41ordinance pair under god it's like an arranged marriage no i mean elder sampson did use that
09:48exact same phrase but no in an arranged marriage you have one choice rachel will have at least five
09:52or six rad it's a sacred system david and i were married that way and you want what you and david have
09:58for rachel melissa i sent subtext i hate subtext here's a question when was the last time you and
10:06david were physical well aaron was born in december 2012 so nine months before that oh christ sounds
10:16to me like you're caught in a psychological bear trap if you admit that arranged marriage is bad you have
10:22to admit that your own marriage could be bad you pull on that thread and your whole
10:28relationship could unravel like a big sexless cardigan
10:38david would you like to share a hug oh yes that sounds wonderful
10:50it's been a while hasn't it
10:51if you go could you make me just sorry my hands if you go over the side
11:04do you know what i have a headache
11:09what did i just witness nothing aaron your father's fine
11:14back in the day we used to hug like rabbits
11:15rabbits dad do you want to help me out i've cooked andrew miso broth that mary used to make
11:22do you want to deliver it you're not just trying to make it feel useful are you aaron
11:28well please let me do it
11:29andrew andrew i have your liquid meal
11:36do you have prior medical experience
12:02too slow rachel i'm going to need to know what that was
12:09don't use my icy stare against me i've honed mine over years it's for a job
12:16paramedic training i thought you were choosing a more traditional path like me you run your own
12:20business yes but that was only after 20 years of marital
12:25bliss such a long pause there mom look i know you've made a concession with university so how about you
12:31give courtship a try and in return you can do this so to get my own job i need to open myself up to a
12:42lifelong marriage i'm going to take your silence as saying yes but you're too ashamed to say it out
12:48loud i wouldn't refute that deal
12:50okay here we go i don't know who mrs abijah is but i do know how she wants me to look
13:06are you sure there's going to be a mrs abijah why wouldn't there be a mrs abijah because me dad
13:12couldn't find your match card samson was just joking look if i got married i'd be happier i'd be
13:19more energized and when i had kids there'd be lots of little abijahs running around basically lots more
13:25me i mean what could he have against that yeah no idea okay imagine us two roomies married we'd have to
13:35get a few more bags bye job if we were married we won't be living together if that's how you feel josh
13:42it's a one-bed fight how you feel josh
13:50where are you off to aaron i only speak to andrew on my own a water on track with andrew
13:56solo can i come i'd rather not dad i thought delivering soup was within your skill set but
14:02now andrew's carpet smells of soybeans forever so i caused amounts and property damage this is
14:07nothing new that's bad dad that's bad that isn't new andrew's delicate when you talk people tend to
14:15get angry or confused usually both of course i'll just get back to my tapes
14:23okay here's the deal if you really do want to come you can't talk well if i don't talk why am i
14:34coming indeed seriously that's not a word i'd even go as far as saying if you do speak all the good
14:39will between us would evaporate we no longer be father and son just two weird acquaintances with
14:43a big age gap who live in the same house for some reason do you still want to come aaron yes i do
14:50you really don't need to stick around please front row tickets to the freak show where's the popcorn
15:00this is a perfectly normal process those are some of the boys rachel will be meeting oh
15:07felt like a bunch of incels grown in a pale sickly lap these are supposed to be held by children
15:12during candle nights well today it's held by a man in pursuit of his woman marrying a faithful
15:18warden and is rachel's best chance of getting into paradise and you become single again in paradise
15:23do you no oh dear hello samson see josh i do have a seat yeah there's an odd number so i'm using you
15:32as a placeholder no samson you're joking you want me to watch on impotently while everyone except me
15:40finds love have fun okay everyone 10 minutes per match if you ain't bonded in that time it ain't
15:47never gonna happen blessings on finding the one in mark 8 23 jesus has blind men with spit but then in
15:59john 96 he heals him with mud why is that uh i guess i don't really have an opinion yeah most girls don't
16:12it's a christingle and if you pick me it's yours could you give me your number i share a mobile with
16:18my sister my aunt was blessed with the holy spirit in a cellar in glasgow and i've always wanted to
16:26take someone there with me hello rachel just placeholder abijah here always just a placeholder
16:36life is long isn't it life is long hi hi
16:51erin you think you want my help but everything i touch turns to ruin
16:57i couldn't protect my tree i couldn't protect joel i'm losing my grip those things don't define you
17:03andrew andrew we need you i need you and with samson's arranged marriages i don't know
17:11what my future looks like couldn't your father help
17:17i would like someone who isn't my father to help
17:21i'm going to go to the bathroom dad remember what we agreed
17:25thank you for coming and showing your support david
17:38although you haven't really weighed in
17:42you do agree with aaron don't you that i should return to the church
17:46oh oh i see well if you think i'm damaged goods david tell me oh you think i'm irredeemable
18:01tell me one thing david is it just you or does everyone at the church feel the same way
18:05oh i'm a disgrace i infect everything i touch
18:17did you say well i said nothing so how's it going spent the last two months offering jesus to
18:24girls with brighter futures than me you i feel renewed full of purpose i can tell
18:29a nice suit thank you look like the mns back to school sale came to life i wanted to show i'm
18:35committed so committed that you dubbed me in what josh you told on me to samson which is why i
18:40couldn't go to uni which is why my realistic five-year plan involves being a trad wife to a man who makes
18:46christingles rachel my my dad already knew you told him me and then you ghosted me for two months
18:54i was following the rules so i could come back that's what you asked me to do yeah i said come back to
18:58the order by throwing me under the bus i didn't throw you under the bus i just told samson what
19:02he needed to hear so i could see you again you thought i was ghosting you rachel i'm so sorry
19:18it's a bit late josh i've missed you every day i've been on penance
19:24i already submitted my match card with you as my match and if you give me a chance to redeem
19:28myself i will if you're wondering how i type that so quickly it's because i copied it from a
19:33notes page that i've been anxiously editing for about a month me again i've done the whole circuit
19:43everyone our fallen congregant joel has something he'd like to say
19:48i i joel johnson do hereby agree to take a vow of chastity i commit to partaking in no sexual activity
20:04with any woman to whom i am not married turn the page
20:08and due to my behavior i also agree never to marry keep reading i will abstain from all sexual release
20:22including and especially self-administered samson well done yeah that is binding that is that is
20:30binding would you say this is healthy we've just watched a room full of teenagers applaud a man for
20:37agreeing not to wank yeah and do you agree that not wanking is healthy i've punished oh fiona you make
20:49me so sad wondering whether to hand in early must be nice having that option but one date left you
20:56may as well wait you could be swept off your feet by uh jebediah yeah sounds like a real catch
21:06hey you're jebediah please call me jeb
21:10we're supposed to be finished must be going pretty well over there
21:24it's so funny she was just about to hand in her card right after your date and
21:27i told her to give this guy a try and look what's happening
21:31i thought leviticus said tattoos weren't allowed yeah leviticus 19 see do not mark your flesh
21:40i don't think faith is a list of rules i think it's about experiencing god's creation
21:46everything and everyone in it
21:53all right shall we head home remind me are you bed or bag tonight oh i think bed
21:58all right cool but remember tomorrow's back
22:09aaron's angry for some reason i guess he is nearly a teenager if we were in hell we wouldn't know
22:15the devil wouldn't tell us
22:16the devil wouldn't tell us
22:24hi in my old chapter we used to hug goodbye is it okay if we
22:31what's wrong
22:42what's wrong
22:45bye david
22:46david shall we hug oh um thanks fiona but i i think i'll need 20 minutes before i can go again
23:10do
23:18oh
23:29oh
23:31oh
23:31oh
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