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  • 2 days ago
ELLIE and Dan have been together for four years. They first met through mutual friends and were dating other people. But once those relationships ended, they found their chemistry undeniable and got together. Ellie was smitten with Dan from the get-go; however, four months in, it all changed. Dan's cheating and deceiving had begun. It started with text messages to other girls, and then it became physical. He told Love Don't Judge, "My ego took over my life. I was obsessed with going out and meeting other girls." Ellie explained how she became paranoid during this period of their relationship, "I used to check Dan's phone all the time; he used to be sleeping, and I would crawl across him and get his phone." She continued, "It was a shock, because it's meant to be your loved one, and they're just doing your dirty behind your back." But Dan said that he wasn't aware of the effect it was having on his girlfriend, "I didn't think it was hurting you", he said. "Being a young lad, you get away with something, you keep doing it." The pair are influencers and have faced significant negativity for staying together. "People really want me to leave Dan", Ellie said. Comments left on their pages range from "This guy needs therapy", "He's gaslighting you", to "It's really sad how little she respects herself." In this episode, the couple sits down with Ellie's mom to discuss the infidelity and whether Dan is ready to commit long-term to her daughter.

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Transcript
00:00My boyfriend kept cheating on me and I stayed with him.
00:02I still love him.
00:03You get away with something, you keep doing it.
00:05I found out he started cheating when I first got his phone password.
00:08All these girls started popping up.
00:10And I was like, well you can f*** off and you can get out of the club now.
00:13People really want me to leave Dan.
00:16This guy needs therapy. Mentally destroyed that gorgeous girl.
00:19I think it's actually really sad how little she respects herself.
00:22This guy is a minus one at best, girl. He's gaslighted you.
00:26My mum's coming over today and we're going to have a conversation
00:29about Dan's cheating. I don't know what she's going to say.
00:32Was it scared?
00:33I'd like to ask Dan what his feelings are in the future
00:36moving forward with my daughter.
00:38I used to feel anxious going into town
00:41because there was a club called Vanilla.
00:43I think when it's so late you end up getting proper messy
00:46and that's when you used to go wrong.
00:48So I was 15 and we met three friends.
00:55You were going out with my mate, weren't you, before?
00:59Yeah.
01:00Who I knew and I remember messaging him saying
01:02you better keep her away from me.
01:04A couple of weeks later when he broke up
01:05I started dating her and then kind of got with you, didn't I?
01:08Here we are.
01:09I think it started going wrong when I turned 80
01:14and I started going out properly, going out with my boys.
01:18And I wasn't old enough to go out.
01:20And you wasn't old enough to go out.
01:21It used to be stay at home and wait for you to come home
01:24after you'd obviously done the day out.
01:27I remember one time where you were at
01:29and I said to Dan I'll pick you up at like two o'clock
01:32and he wasn't outside the nightclub.
01:35I came in in my slippers and pyjamas and I was like,
01:37And then you saw some girl talking to me.
01:39And I was like, you can f*** off and you can get out of the club now.
01:42I think it just like, that's when the trust started to go I think.
01:47I've probably found out he started cheating when I first got his phone password.
01:52Yeah.
01:53All these girls start popping up and then I think that's when you found out I was actually cheating.
01:56Yeah. At first I think it's a shock because you think, well, like it's meant to be your loved one
02:03and then they're just doing you dirty behind your back.
02:05I didn't think it was hurting me.
02:07In the end you do put your back up to it and you're like, I'm not going to show him any emotions.
02:11I know, because I was getting away with it.
02:13You get away with something, you keep doing it.
02:15But that's why I think I kept doing it.
02:16I think the turning point was going on Bad Boyfriends on that show.
02:20Yeah.
02:21And Dan just like being told by every other person in that villa.
02:24Or even being told by that I was very close to somebody in the villa.
02:26And he's a loud lad, but he said, you're worse than me.
02:31We're going to read out some of the hate comments that people think on our relationship.
02:35People really want me to leave Dan.
02:38So this one says, this lad is an absolute idiot.
02:41Mentally destroyed that gorgeous girl.
02:43Our generation is gross.
02:45This guy needs therapy.
02:46There's clearly underlying issues that he just masks with all .
02:50Unfortunately, she's in love with him.
02:52He uses attention from other girls to make him feel good.
02:54He needs actual help, which is true.
02:57Because you have had therapy since.
02:58Yeah.
02:59I've tried to talk about my emotions a lot more.
03:03Why can't she see him for what he is and walk away?
03:06That boy is never going to change.
03:08I think it's actually really sad how little she respects herself.
03:11And seems like a very sweet girl with low self-esteem.
03:14He's gaslighted you.
03:15At the start, it made me feel like absolute ****.
03:18All their opinions did get on top of me, like, oh, you shouldn't be with her.
03:22Or even walking through town, it would be like, I don't like you, but I love you.
03:28Comments like that will upset me and **** me off.
03:31There are some good ones.
03:32Someone said people can change.
03:33He's changed for his girl.
03:35You're amazing.
03:36Always remember.
03:37We've all been that angel.
03:38You'll see the light because it's always shining on you.
03:41Give the boy a chance.
03:42Use your work if he's changed.
03:45You get negative comments.
03:46You get good comments.
03:47I said you need to ignore the hate and just get on with the good.
03:50My mum's coming over today and we're going to have a conversation about Dan's cheating
03:54and how much it really affected me.
03:56I don't know what she's going to say.
03:58I'm a bit scared.
03:59I don't know how she's going to feel.
04:02Do you think she believes you're faithful now?
04:04She'll find out.
04:05Yeah.
04:06Always going to have slight reservation naturally because leopards and spots.
04:11I'd like to ask Dan what his feelings are in the future moving forward with my daughter.
04:16Hi.
04:17Hey.
04:18How are you?
04:19Good, you?
04:20Yeah, good thanks, baby girl.
04:21How's it going?
04:23You okay, Dan?
04:23I'm all good.
04:24Good.
04:25So what have you two been up to then?
04:27Just on your socials, no doubt.
04:29Yeah.
04:30How's that all going?
04:3123.5 minutes?
04:3323.
04:35That's amazing.
04:36God, how the dynamics of that have changed from Dan having all the followers.
04:41So how do you feel you guys are getting on now then, strength-wise with your relationship
04:46and everything to where you were before?
04:47Not better.
04:48Yeah, better than before.
04:49Yeah.
04:50It's what it needed, totally.
04:51It's what Dan needed.
04:52He needed to kick up the backside.
04:53Yeah, right.
04:54And I've only been telling them that for the last four years, but, you know, and saying
04:59don't you ever jeopardise the relationship and stuff and it's had to take you watching
05:02yourself back on TV to be the wake-up call.
05:05Yeah.
05:06Yeah.
05:07And you could have lost her.
05:08I think it was the best thing that happened to our relationship.
05:09Well, the whole nation don't think we should be together.
05:11No.
05:12But some of them do.
05:15I think the concern for, obviously myself, naturally, but for the whole nation is how
05:20are you going to move forward with this?
05:22Obviously, together, if you're going to have a future together, what happens if you have
05:26children?
05:27Like you said to each other, we want to be together, we want to get that happy family.
05:32Yeah.
05:33So.
05:34But then you've got to prove that as well, though, because trust takes a lot of building,
05:38doesn't it?
05:39Yeah.
05:40How's your trust issues going to be?
05:41Because trust is obviously earned and built.
05:44Well, yeah, but it builds over time, doesn't it?
05:47And I think it's already come a long way from what it was.
05:51So, but it's this one's choice at the end of the day.
05:55Yeah!
05:56You know, you've been together for such a long time for a reason.
06:01And obviously Ellie's still with you for a reason.
06:03Yeah, if you see something, obviously.
06:05Yeah.
06:06Because it's easy, too easy just to chuck it away.
06:08I don't think anything else can break us.
06:10As they say, there's no future in the past, is there?
06:12Definitely not.
06:13So I just think you're lucky to have another chance, Dan, and for Ellie to work at it.
06:18Yeah, Dan.
06:19To appreciate what you've got and don't ever jeopardise it again.
06:22Last chance scenario.
06:23Literally last chance.
06:25Last chance scenario.
06:26I would be hopping, running, legging down the road, mate.
06:30And then skipping and then jumping.
06:32I think my ego took over my life.
06:34Yeah, I was obsessed with going out and meeting other girls.
06:36I think it's definitely all I want in this relationship because she helps me a lot.
06:42She helps me keep grounded.
06:44She's always there for me and that's what you want in your partner.
06:47I used to check Dan's phone all the time.
06:49I always used to check it.
06:51So he used to be asleep and I used to crawl across him and then get his phone.
06:55I think Dan knows his boundaries now.
06:57So not talking to girls, not messaging girls.
07:00He doesn't ever go out without me anymore.
07:02We've been through some real tough times as a family and he's really, really helped through that.
07:07He's a supportive partner.
07:08So what advice would you give to another woman's partner who might be cheating on them?
07:13I'd tell them to leave.
07:14If now Dan did that, I'd be like, do not f*** off as far away as me as you can.
07:20So build yourself up strong enough and then leave.
07:23If Dan cheated again, I'd honestly swear on my whole entire life, on my mum's life, I'd be gone.
07:29That I don't deserve that level of disrespect again.
07:32Our relationship works because the respect we have for each other now is totally different.
07:36Coming out of that villa has actually changed my mind and actually showed me that I've actually got somebody in front of me
07:40who actually wants to put some effort into our relationship and me.
07:44How has Ellie changed my life?
07:46I think, you know, seeing the good in me.
07:49Don't judge a book by its cover.
07:51You don't know what's gone on behind the scenes of all these TV shows.
07:56So yeah, to the haters, here we are.
07:58Who never thought that we weren't together, we are.
08:10They realized they turned behind the scenes of all these TV shows.
08:11And you didn't know who schoold.
08:12You what are the levels who was gonna do their How does it work?
08:13It's not worth checking or checking or checking or checking or checking.
08:14Which center gets takes place to hold on behind the scenes of all these TV shows.
08:15Go inside, grab the��도록!
08:19What a lot of stuff.
08:35You know, it says you can pick upанов and fill in their一個 strategy as usual.
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