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00:00Thank you for letting us be ourselves
00:06So don't mind me if I repeat myself
00:08These simple rhymes be good for your health
00:11Keep them crime rhymes on the shelf
00:13Live love life like you just don't care
00:15But I believe it's never scared
00:18Brave noises the moment they fear
00:20Get up, sit up, live, or I dare
00:22Get up, throw your hands in the air
00:25Get up, get up, get up
00:30Reset the clock, check your heating and bring your winter leg down from the attic.
00:42It's Friday, we're live, and it's time for the last leg.
00:46Tonight on the show, we check out whether Prince Andrew's going to get the shove,
00:51find out what's been grabbed at the Louvre,
00:53and get roughed up by some rugby league players.
00:57Plus, we'll be joined by comedians Catherine Bohart and Laura Smith,
01:00and writer and director Richard Ayoade,
01:02on the show that leaves everything on the mat.
01:20G'day! Hello!
01:23Wow!
01:26That's our show for tonight, thanks for tuning in.
01:29G'day, I'm Adam Hilvers, welcome to Last Leg,
01:30the show that heard penguin bars can no longer be called chocolate,
01:33and thought it's the worst thing to happen to penguins since this embarrassing image.
01:38It's a light on air, it as always are the emperor penguin himself, Josh Whittacombe,
01:42and the man who heard Volodymyr Zelensky has gone to number 10,
01:45and thought, I didn't even know he had a single out, Alex Broca!
01:47Yeah!
01:51Love it.
01:56Look, loads to cover tonight news-wise, but on a personal note, for a very brief moment today,
02:00our little Joshy entered the world of disability.
02:03Which, by the way, is not a theme park.
02:05LAUGHTER
02:06World of disability, where everyone goes at the front of the queue.
02:09LAUGHTER
02:12Josh, tell us what happened.
02:13Uh, I had to go to the chiropodist, I hope that's not triggering, and, um...
02:18LAUGHTER
02:19I... I... I thought his limping was just, like, sympathy pain.
02:25LAUGHTER
02:26I had a...
02:27I thought I had a corn on the bottom of my foot.
02:30Ugh!
02:31What?
02:32LAUGHTER
02:33No, don't...
02:34There's nothing wrong with feet!
02:36And...
02:37I...
02:38I went, and it was just...
02:39It just turned out I didn't have a corn,
02:41I just had a lot of dead skin.
02:43Earlier in the week, you said to us,
02:45I need foot surgery.
02:46That's how you said it.
02:47I did say foot surgery.
02:49He did use a scalpel.
02:50He did use...
02:51And I...
02:52I kept all the dead skin, cos I thought,
02:54if I keep going back,
02:55you guys could use it to build a new one.
02:57LAUGHTER
02:59You want to be careful, though.
03:01APPLAUSE
03:02Yeah, go on.
03:03Well, no, that's how we started, wasn't it, dead skin?
03:06Me and you, and then, look at us.
03:07LAUGHTER
03:08Yeah, yeah, yeah.
03:09And also, people wonder why the NHS is under pressure.
03:12LAUGHTER
03:13I went private.
03:14LAUGHTER
03:16Yeah, both of ours started off as corns.
03:18Little tip, little tip,
03:19make sure you use the doctor
03:20who has a scalpel, not a machete.
03:22LAUGHTER
03:23I've got a little...
03:24Didn't Brooker fall asleep
03:25and he woke up and he went,
03:26What?!
03:27LAUGHTER
03:28I've got a photo here
03:29that shows just how serious
03:30Josh's injury was.
03:31Look at that.
03:32You can't even see it.
03:33It's so small.
03:34The biggest thing on your foot
03:36is the tattoo that says Greg.
03:37That is a tattoo that says Greg.
03:39Yeah.
03:40That's an arrival Channel 4 show
03:41that I did it on.
03:42I forgot how much of a fan you used to be of Greg Wallace.
03:45LAUGHTER
03:47Have you still got Schofield on the other end?
03:50LAUGHTER
03:51I've got Greg Wallace and John Turow as my friends.
03:54LAUGHTER
03:55But I did feel quite guilty
03:57because I went to the place that was doing it
03:59and it had the name of the place that did my operation.
04:04Yep.
04:05I felt it was a bit weird to go there on the day of the last leg
04:08because it was called Feet for Life.
04:10LAUGHTER
04:11And they had a photo of both of you saying,
04:14don't let these two time wasters come in.
04:16LAUGHTER
04:18Well, look, there is a market for photos like that
04:20of your foot.
04:21I've already uploaded it to this website.
04:24That's Corn Hub.
04:26LAUGHTER
04:28LAUGHTER
04:29It's had 1,427,000 views!
04:32Yeah, I made that up.
04:35LAUGHTER
04:36No, look, I...
04:38I was under the impression
04:39that Josh was going in for something serious...
04:41Yep.
04:42..this morning, but I got you...
04:44I got you a sticker made.
04:45What, have you?
04:46Because I thought, yeah,
04:47which conveniently has already been peeled for me
04:49because, obviously,
04:50last leg producers don't trust me
04:51to peel a sticker on live television.
04:53LAUGHTER
04:54There you go.
04:55It says, I've been a brave boy.
04:57LAUGHTER
04:58APPLAUSE
05:01Let's just stick it on there.
05:03Um...
05:05Ah!
05:06The other...
05:07Oh, it's...
05:08The last leg producers were right.
05:09Ironic.
05:10I've also got you a lollipop,
05:12which is also because you've been brave,
05:14but also because I know the news story
05:16we're going to be talking about in a minute,
05:17and I think it would be funny if you had a lollipop.
05:19Right, yeah.
05:20LAUGHTER
05:22LAUGHTER
05:23I might save that for part two.
05:25LAUGHTER
05:26We are live on your telly right now.
05:27Send us any questions you want to ask us about the news.
05:30Um...
05:31Instagram, use the hashtag IsItOK?
05:32WhatsApp, use the number 07956175908,
05:36or you can scan the QR code on the screen.
05:38For example, Damien said,
05:40Is it OK that a man with severe autism
05:42spent four years volunteering at Waitrose,
05:44over 600 hours, and this week got dropped
05:47the moment his family asked
05:48if he could finally be paid for the same work?
05:50No, it's not OK, Damien, but what is OK
05:53is that Asda immediately contacted the man in question
05:56and have now offered him a job?
05:58Well done.
05:59APPLAUSE
06:08Uh, not the first disabled person
06:09to work in a supermarket, though, eh, Alex?
06:10No, no, no.
06:11Um, they...
06:12I used to work at Tesco,
06:14but this is in the...
06:15I was on the tills before there was, like, chip and pin.
06:17Yep.
06:18So there was obviously a lot of hand-in of cash and coins,
06:20and they used to give me a little pot to scoop the money in,
06:22so then I could scoop it into, like, the customer's hands.
06:25Oh.
06:26But I'd have the pot on top of the...
06:27on top of the till.
06:28Yeah.
06:29And there was...
06:30LAUGHTER
06:31Well, what I found one Saturday shift is,
06:33this geezer walked past after I'd done his shopping,
06:35and I think he thought it was just a collection for me,
06:37and stuck a fiver in it.
06:39LAUGHTER
06:44Thanks, mate.
06:45Cheers.
06:47Yeah.
06:48These were still the money-makers back then.
06:50LAUGHTER
06:51All right, let's get stuck into the news now,
06:53and Monique said,
06:54Is it OK to make Mike the Duke of York,
06:56now that Andrew has given up his title?
06:58LAUGHTER
07:09You look... you look good in a hat, Mike.
07:11You look like a failed Chippendale.
07:13LAUGHTER
07:15LAUGHTER
07:16Oh, my God, you're Magic Mike!
07:18LAUGHTER
07:21This week, the posthumous memoir of Virginia Geoffrey was released,
07:24in which she claims convicted pedophile Geoffrey Epstein,
07:26groomed, then trafficked her to a number of high-profile figures.
07:29One of those figures was Prince Andrew,
07:31who was mentioned 88 times in the book.
07:34To put that into perspective,
07:35that's more times than The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe
07:37were mentioned in The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe.
07:40LAUGHTER
07:41It was also alleged Prince Andrew tried to hire internet trolls
07:43to hassle Geoffrey,
07:45and pressured a police bodyguard to dig up some dirt on her.
07:48Now, Andrew hasn't commented this week,
07:50but he has consistently denied all allegations,
07:52and last week said he would stop using his titles
07:54to avoid bringing controversy to the royal family.
07:57King Charles has also yet to comment,
07:59yesterday, he prayed with the Pope.
08:01Because, you know, the best way to distract from a sex scandal
08:03is to hang out with the head of the Catholic Church.
08:05LAUGHTER
08:06APPLAUSE
08:08APPLAUSE
08:14My guess is he asked the Pope for advice.
08:17LAUGHTER
08:18What's that? Move Andrew to another parish?
08:20Good call.
08:21LAUGHTER
08:22There are now calls for the Prince to vacate Royal Lodge,
08:25the 30-room mansion he's been living in,
08:27for what's called a peppercorn rent,
08:29which I'm pretty sure is what Josh had removed from his foot.
08:31LAUGHTER
08:32A peppercorn rent means the Prince is only required
08:34to pay a single peppercorn per year to lease the lodge,
08:38but only if demanded,
08:39in this revealing bit of the contract.
08:41OK?
08:43What does he need?
08:45What does he need a 30-bedroom gaff for?
08:47That's my thing. Why does he...
08:49It's only him?
08:50Yeah. Isn't it?
08:51He should just go along, like, get himself online,
08:53just find himself...
08:54find himself a house share.
08:55Not students, but...
08:57LAUGHTER
08:58Yeah.
08:59It says a lot about the British property market
09:01that Prince Andrew can't get on the property ladder.
09:04LAUGHTER
09:05Like, what chance have young people got,
09:07dads, to get on the property ladder?
09:09Just...
09:10Not...
09:11LAUGHTER
09:12Do you know what? Move on.
09:13LAUGHTER
09:14Prince Andrew did have to pay £8 million up front
09:16for the lease of the lodge,
09:17including £7.5 million for refurbishments.
09:20But...
09:21Some people are now asking where that money came from.
09:23In fact, they're also asking
09:24where the £12 million came from
09:26that he used to settle out of court
09:27with Virginia Giffray in 2022.
09:29And was any of that from taxpayers?
09:32Because I think most people would agree,
09:33we want our money spent on potholes, not assholes.
09:36LAUGHTER
09:37APPLAUSE
09:38I think there's a lot of kind of people that have a go
09:48at Prince Harry, but at least he had the good grace
09:51to rip off Netflix to make his money.
09:54LAUGHTER
09:55Yeah, I feel a bit sorry for Prince Harry.
09:57He kind of gets lumped in with, like, Prince Andrew's
09:59kind of like the black sheep of, like, the royal family.
10:02Yeah.
10:03Like the bad guys are the royal family.
10:04But it's like...
10:05Andrew was, like, friends with a known sex trafficker.
10:08Yeah.
10:09And all, like, Harry's done is, like, show Oprah's chickens.
10:11LAUGHTER
10:13Yeah.
10:14Unless that's a euphobism, that's a totally different thing.
10:16LAUGHTER
10:17Our talkers now turn to how the Prince spends his time now,
10:20uh, with one royal insider saying this.
10:23Uh, oh, no, I've got to read this,
10:25because this is a genuine thing that I've lost.
10:29LAUGHTER
10:32I've never seen someone with so many cards in my life!
10:35LAUGHTER
10:36Oh, it's down here, it's fallen on the floor.
10:38LAUGHTER
10:39Right.
10:40Welcome to live television, everyone.
10:42LAUGHTER
10:43OK.
10:44One insider said this about the Prince.
10:46Can I just say, you put on your glasses very swiftly.
10:49LAUGHTER
10:51Um, God, I hate working with Josh...
10:52Sorry, wrong thing.
10:53LAUGHTER
10:54OK, one royal insider said this about Prince Andrew.
10:58Quote,
10:59Andrew seems to spend most of his time
11:01either riding around the huge estate on horseback
11:03or reportedly sitting in front of a big screen
11:05watching live coverage of planes landing and taking off.
11:09LAUGHTER
11:10I...
11:11I don't mind hearing that he's doing loads of horseback riding,
11:15because doesn't he kind of feel like the sort of geezer
11:17where it's probably better if his groin's numb?
11:20LAUGHTER
11:22LAUGHTER
11:23Ha!
11:24On the...
11:25APPLAUSE
11:34I think we should move on.
11:36LAUGHTER
11:37Where's your lollipop?
11:38LAUGHTER
11:39It's not any better.
11:40Another source said this of the Prince.
11:42There's a direct quote, by the way.
11:43His bedtime habits as a single man left a lot to be desired.
11:49And a collection of scrunched up soiled tissues
11:52usually lay scattered around the bed each morning
11:54for staff to collect after they had made his bed.
11:57LAUGHTER
11:58I mean, we've all heard the phrase,
12:00one day my Prince will come.
12:02LAUGHTER
12:03Turns out...
12:12Turns out it happens three times a night.
12:14So, in his defence...
12:15Yeah.
12:16I know...
12:17I've heard what his defence is of that,
12:18and you...
12:19That isn't what you think it is.
12:20Mm.
12:21Because you might not know this,
12:22but during the Falklands,
12:23due to an overdose of adrenaline...
12:24Yeah.
12:25He now can't jizz.
12:26LAUGHTER
12:27LAUGHTER
12:28I just...
12:30I...
12:31I just think, like, sort of behaviour,
12:32he's acting like a teenager,
12:34so he probably turned himself up.
12:35Oh!
12:36LAUGHTER
12:38Look, it's...
12:43The thing is,
12:44it's not the image of a prince
12:45that we're...
12:46we got from fairy tales, right?
12:47Do you know what I mean?
12:48This is not what you think a prince is going to be
12:50when you're growing up.
12:51Imagine...
12:52Imagine if your mum,
12:53as you're going to bed,
12:54read this to you.
12:58Right.
12:59LAUGHTER
13:02And a collection of scrunched up soiled tissues
13:04usually lay scattered around the bed each morning
13:06for staff to collect after they'd made his bed.
13:09The.
13:10End.
13:11LAUGHTER
13:12And that's a...
13:21That's from a book about Andrew's friendship
13:22with Jeffrey Epstein called The Prince and the Pedo.
13:27Another insider this week claims, uh,
13:29Andrew spends most of his time playing video games.
13:31Jesus Christ, I don't know...
13:32I genuinely don't want to know what his Final Fantasy is.
13:36LAUGHTER
13:37It did make us wonder
13:38what video game could we create for Prince Andrew?
13:40Yes.
13:41Personal Space Invaders,
13:42uh...
13:43Grand Old Duke of York Theft Auto,
13:45The Worst of Us.
13:47Prince of Pervert.
13:48Prince of Pervert.
13:49Lovely.
13:50Uh...
13:51Sweatress.
13:52Mm-hmm.
13:53LAUGHTER
13:54Or...
13:55Call of Diddy.
13:56LAUGHTER
13:57APPLAUSE
13:59So our poll for tonight is this.
14:00What video game should we create for Prince Andrew?
14:01Uh...
14:02Send us a message on WhatsApp or on socials.
14:03Use the hashtag a game for Andrew.
14:04Next week, we'll turn our favourite suggestion into an actual game,
14:05and we will play it on the show.
14:06Oh, and by the way, at the end of tonight's show,
14:07we're going to unveil a sneaky peek at what we think could be Prince Andrew's next career move.
14:09Oh.
14:10Vote.
14:11Vote.
14:12Vote.
14:13Vote.
14:14Oh, yes.
14:15His own Netflix lifestyle show.
14:16Uh, and look, there have been loads of people protesting outside Prince Andrew's property
14:18this week, uh, and we thought maybe we'd help them out a little bit.
14:21So we've come up with a gift basket for them to take along.
14:24Um, first thing, we thought, a little bit of a joke, might be nice to hang a sign
14:26on the front gates, uh, it says, uh, ignore the dog, it's the owner you need to worry about.
14:43Uh, and then in here, uh, look, just in case he does leave the lodge, um, uh, there's a printout
14:52of properties for rent in the local area.
14:55Um.
14:56He's probably not allowed on the internet, is he?
14:58Yeah.
14:59Um.
15:00Oh, like this one right here.
15:01Uh, uh, available now, right under the flight path, uh, within 500 metres of a Pizza Express.
15:07Uh, not within 500 metres of a school.
15:11Uh, and since he might have to start paying a lot more for rent than a peppercorn a year,
15:15we've also got him this.
15:17Oh, lovely.
15:18Oh, look at that.
15:19It's a shitload of peppercorns.
15:20Yep.
15:21The P, the P stands for pepper, doesn't it?
15:22Yep.
15:23Legally, yes it does.
15:24Uh, would you like to take that, uh, and take that, and take it all to the lodge?
15:41Uh, we'll send it to Prince Andrew.
15:42Take it away.
15:43Hey!
15:53Alright, let's welcome tonight's guests, two class clowns and a geography teacher.
15:56It's comedians Laura Smith and Catherine Bohart, and writer, director and presenter, Richard
16:00Ayoade.
16:01APPLAUSE
16:02Thank you!
16:03I'm so happy!
16:04Thank you!
16:05Thank you!
16:06Thank you!
16:07Fucking hell.
16:08APPLAUSE
16:09What on earth have you all made of the week's events?
16:11Laura?
16:12There's a lot going on in there.
16:13Yeah.
16:14There is a lot going on.
16:15I don't know, I feel like, it feels a bit tokenistic that giving up the titles.
16:19Yeah, yeah, yeah.
16:20I think he should give up the 30 million gaff, the big gaff, the 30 rooms gaff, that's what
16:25you should give up.
16:26And then I think, yes, that's what you should do, Duke of York.
16:27Get rid of that, and then I'll believe you.
16:28Catherine?
16:29Yeah, I mean, imagine if I was just, like, pro-Andrew.
16:30No, I'm not, to be clear.
16:31But I, you know, they say rich men never face consequences, so it's nice to see him have
16:36to give up all of his fake medals and pretend jobs.
16:37That feels important.
16:38That feels important.
16:39Yeah.
16:40Yeah, I mean, imagine if I was just, like, pro-Andrew.
16:41No, I'm not, to be clear.
16:42But I, you know, they say rich men never face consequences, so it's nice to see him have
16:51to give up all of his fake medals and pretend jobs.
16:54That feels important.
16:55Richard?
16:56I think Claudia and Tess, it's their time to go.
17:00Yeah.
17:01It's been a fantastic 20 years.
17:02This is the best.
17:04It's been a fantastic 20 years.
17:07This is the best.
17:08It's the best.
17:10Yeah.
17:11It's a celebration.
17:12Who are your favourite dancers this series, Richard?
17:13I like, er, the big ones.
17:14And I like all of them.
17:15Yeah.
17:16The way they move.
17:17Yeah.
17:18There's such grace.
17:19Do you know how far the Royal Lodge is from the train station?
17:20What's that got to do with Tess and Claudia?
17:21Well, they're not putting in an offer.
17:22Because it's useless.
17:23I mean, let him have it.
17:24It is 30 minutes to a railway station.
17:25I mean, I don't know how far the Royal Lodge is from the train station.
17:26What's that got to do with Tess and Claudia?
17:27Well, they're not putting in an offer.
17:28Because it's useless.
17:29I mean, let him have it.
17:30It is 30 minutes to a railway station.
17:31Sure, every 20 minutes are going to Paddington.
17:32But if you miss one, you're there 50 minutes.
17:33It's a nightmare.
17:34Yeah.
17:35Yeah.
17:36And I looked it up on Zoopla.
17:37The energy rating is E.
17:38Now, it's been reported this week that the ceremonial banner...
17:42You can't do it.
17:43You've been in one room with a bar heater for the entire time.
17:47There was a ceremonial banner bearing Prince Andrew's heraldic
17:52airing the airing of the airing of the air.
17:55It's useless.
17:56It's useless.
17:57I mean, let him have it.
17:58It is thirty minutes to a railway station.
18:00Sure, every twenty minutes to go into Paddington.
18:01But if you miss one, you're there 50 minutes to Paddington.
18:02It's a nightmare.
18:03Bearing Prince Andrew's heraldic insignia at St. George's Chapel at Windsor Castle. It's been taken down this week
18:09Which begs the question like are they getting rid of it or are they coming up with a replacement coat of arms for Prince Andrew?
18:15And if so, what should that be? I'm thinking maybe a lion getting a massage from a cub
18:22The crest doesn't it has a shield so obviously they could have some sort of imagery of his dead mother and then
18:28That's his shield and then you need a helmet no comment and then
18:33Obviously you have to have a motto don't you so it could just be sort of a father of daughters and
18:38I think you'd have a lovely new crest to be great
18:40Oh, you maybe he could be fallen as well because you have to pretend to be sorry
18:44Yeah, Laura, I'm thinking a pizza
18:48Topped with 12 million pounds
18:53Richard I mean sell it the advertising space
18:56All right, you know what let's get on to the big entertainment news that Richard clearly wants to talk about Todd said yesterday
19:03Is it okay to talk about Tess Daly and Claudia Winkleman leaving Strictly come dancing at the end of the season the worst thing to happen to Strictly since this
19:09Oh, come on now
19:13That's a shame twice in one night
19:17It's gonna happen again
19:19Now look everyone's clearly going to be vying to host Strictly so we thought tonight we would throw a hat into the room
19:25Oh, because there's one person here tonight that we think has the energy the positivity and the razzmatazz to fit the bill
19:32It is of course Richard Iowati
19:34Thank you
19:43We're gonna make our own little kind of Strictly audition tape if you will but I need everyone in places Catherine
19:49Can you go over there next to Alex? You're gonna be the judges Josh and Laura?
19:52Can you go over there to the dance floor? Basically?
19:55We're gonna pick up as you've just finished your dance. Oh, so if you could come up with like an ending to your dance
20:00Richard this is your moment
20:02This is your moment. What about the other moments?
20:06Is this my blocking this is you coming over here right now if you'd like to just come here. Yeah, I walk you yep
20:13I think you present from there if that's okay. That's what happens on the show. Yeah, it is
20:19Okay
20:20Here we go lights what happens they don't they'll dance they come to you and that's a show
20:32We've had the lights let's have the camera let's have the showbiz let's do this
20:42What you dropped a peanut what?
21:12It was a peppercorn. Okay, I see
21:15It's fine. I don't need it for this month and so well done. I can see why you're out of breath
21:21Yeah, and what happened? What did you do this then?
21:24What would you call that what was the dance call?
21:26The cha-cha. The cha-cha. Okay, and this is a show where's he gone?
21:33Is he never there? Does he do this in between things?
21:35Yeah, yeah, if he's not involved you just want to. And this is a waged event you get paid
21:39Yeah, yeah, yeah. It pays. Okay
21:42Go to the judges
21:44Go to the judges. How am I meant to know? That's not intuitive
21:47Go to the judges as if that's the obvious thing to do after that. What what did you think of whatever that was?
21:54I thought
22:04Laurie, you were great. Are you playing table tennis?
22:06What's that? There's no time for table tennis
22:09Someone said that to me
22:11Josh, your feet were a little wood and you look like you've got a corn or something, but I'm gonna give you
22:18Seven
22:23Richard, I genuinely think you have all the makings of a strictly host because the only criteria it seems to be is dressed like a lesbian every week and he's nailed it
22:32I look like an electrician who could burst into song. Yes, you really do. It is a four from me
22:38Oh
22:40Just on the count of the dance we saw
22:44Richard, read from the autocue. Read from the autocue. This is grueling
22:50Down to the front. No, I'm free
22:53What a week it's been we've had tear sequins and the magic of movement. I for one
23:08We've got ease freely
23:10We'll see you next week
23:12We'll see you next week when Dame Judi Dench dances the Paso Doble with big nasty, but until then we have to do this
23:17We have to no we have to
23:19Put them in their hand and that and that
23:21Keep dancing
23:29We'll have more last night for you after the break as we check out Donald Trump's ballroom. We need to keep doing this
23:32We need to keep doing this. We're still doing this
23:34And a few rugby league players check out my ballroom
23:36They do this every week
23:38They pretend to dance while they do the outro
23:40Absolutely
23:42This is insane. Plus we want to know what video games should we create for Prince Andrew
23:44This is the longest I've ever held someone's hand away
23:46From Whatsapp or socials, here's the hashtag again for Andrew, we'll see you soon
23:50I've got to look at
24:06Welcome back to the last leg
24:08Hello
24:10Welcome back to the last leg the show that has heard lily allen's new album and we'd just like to say lily if you're watching we love you
24:16We loved having you on the show. Please don't write a song about us
24:18We're joined by laura smith katherine bowhart and the prince of the dance floor richard iowati
24:28Now normally on the show we try to balance out political news with childish jokes, but this week the white house did it for us
24:34So this all came after it was announced that donald trump would meet vladimir putin in budapest
24:38Which was controversial because that's where russia once forced ukraine to surrender their nuclear weapons in order to maintain independence
24:44A journalist from the huffington post sent a message to the white house press secretary caroline levitt
24:48Asking who chose budapest as the venue for the summit the white house press secretary gave this blunt retort?
24:54Your mum did
25:02Is this okay?
25:04Yes
25:06You gotta fight fire with fire that is it your mum
25:12You can't come back
25:14You can't come back
25:16Mic drop your mum
25:18Later in the week pete hegseth drew attention for this unusual tie
25:22That seemed to have the colors of the russian flag on it
25:24When asked about that the pentagon chief spokesman said
25:28Your mum bought it for him
25:32What the fuck is going on in america?
25:36What is going on in america?
25:38Is this guy the new speechwriter?
25:40Honestly what kind of person responds to a message with your mum?
25:52Apart from alex in 2017 as you can see here what happened alex?
25:56Well someone tweeted
25:58Saying what a pile of unfunny lefty shite
26:00Who the hell commissions this show?
26:02And it appears at a 4.36 when I was in the morning when I was drunk I replied your mum
26:08Ahead of his time
26:16To be fair that was the son of the head of channel 4
26:18Meanwhile Donald Trump began tearing down the east wing of the white house this week
26:22To build a 300 million dollar ballroom
26:24That will supposedly be paid for by himself and some donors
26:28I mean is it suspicious that tess and claudia are leaving strictly as
26:32Trump starts building a ballroom
26:34By the way we have an exclusive picture of the first act booked to dance in that ballroom
26:38Oh
26:40Go for it
26:46I've got to put the hat on for you as well
26:50And by the looks of this garish photo the plans seem to be a symphony in gold
26:54Well how do we feel about that?
26:56It's a huge call on a rental property isn't it?
26:59Like surely he knows he has to go
27:02I live in London I've been taken to court over blue tack the man's building a ballroom
27:06I love it
27:08I love it
27:10That's like being inside a pineapple
27:12It looks like when you've printed
27:14But if you've also died
27:16I think he'll make his money back though
27:18Because that looks like he could probably sell it as a wedding venue on Groupon
27:22Or he could just melt it down for bullion
27:26By the way the White House has said the ballroom won't be ready
27:30For use until just before Trump's second term ends in January 2029
27:36I mean they say that but you know what builders are like
27:38That's what that's that's that's 2032
27:402033
27:42This is the sign he's staying isn't it
27:44That he's gonna stay forever you don't build a ballroom
27:46Yeah
27:47And then move out
27:48That is rule 101 from Kevin MacLeod
27:51Kevin MacLeod
27:53This all seems to be part of Donald Trump's plan to turn the White House into the golden nugget
27:57Have a look at what the Oval Office looked like before Trump's presidency
28:00Look at that revealing image okay
28:02This is what the Oval Office looks like now
28:05I think it's good that Lawrence Lyle and Bowen's still getting work
28:09We are we are in the timeline where Biff's got the almanac
28:13Yes I was just gonna say that I mean I love I feel like I would be friends with a fabulous gay man who clearly lives inside Donald Trump it's like I'm building a ballroom let's make everything gold just for Donaldo do you know?
28:24And look if you're wondering where Trump gets his inspiration from check out this glitzy photo this is him and wife Ivana in St. Petersburg Russia in the 80s
28:30How's her head the most gaudy thing in that photo?
28:32How dare you?
28:34Is it do you think Donald Trump just wants to be Putin?
28:38Yeah I mean we're six months away. This is a very strange panto
28:41Wow!
28:42No no!
28:43No no no no no!
28:45No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no there's no no no you don't
28:49No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no
28:52Is it do you think Donald Trump just wants to be Putin?
28:58Yeah, I mean we're six months away. This is a very strange panto
29:05Yeah, he's behind you half naked on a horse
29:10When we say Putin sound vaguely uncertain
29:15All right, let's move on now sporting news tomorrow is a huge day for rugby league the first ashes test for 20
29:21Years is taking place at Wembley Australia and England are going head-to-head over three test series
29:26And look what a lot of people don't know is when you play rugby league and you tackle someone you actually talk shit in the tackle
29:33Like you sleep not just on TV
29:35I
29:49Only Josh could trash talk while having a lollipop
29:54This lollipop so sour I
29:59Don't think I can finish it's hurting my tongue too much
30:01There it goes
30:05So basically I headed down to Wembley this way like this new Kojak
30:10Very Mooney I went to Wembley this week to make sure both Australia and England teams had enough to say to each other on the pitch
30:19The ashes the pinnacle of sporting rivalry between Australia and England emotions run wild and so do mouths
30:26So I've come down to Wembley a few days out from the game to check in on each team's sledging game
30:34All right lads as an Aussie who's played over here
30:37I know people like to give you shit gonna run it in and see what you would normally do to someone in a game
30:41I've gone in
30:50How much of that would go on in a tackle pull out said nearly every tackle that nearly every tackle
30:56Imagine I'm an English player and just saying what you would normally say in a test situation
31:00Go
31:10It's a lot different to what the English just did to me
31:15They left this untouched
31:18I've come up with some sledges for you guys that I think might piss the Aussies off during the game if I give them to you
31:23And then you can just rattle off a sledge
31:26Your mum give koalas kvinia
31:3026 legals that I think are gonna you know get under the skin of the English
31:34Go easy mate you're sweating more than Prince Andrew
31:39You run like an English river really slow and full of shit
31:45That's not where I thought my day was going
31:47I want to see an Aussie come out of a tackle going my mum did not give koalas klamydia
31:53Some excellent sledging some great tackling and I think I've got a prostate check in there as well so everything's coming off
32:00You might need to go get checked to be honest
32:13We'll have more last leg for you in a couple of minutes as we break into the Louvre and break out a mystery guest
32:17Plus we want to know what video games should we make for Prince Andrew messages via whatsapp or on socials the hashtags are going for Andrew
32:23We'll see you in a bit
32:25We'll see you in a bit more
32:27We'll see you in a bit more
32:28We'll see you in a bit more
32:29Welcome back to Last Leg, the show that just wants to reiterate how much we love Lili Allen.
32:45We're joined by Laura Smith, Catherine Bohart and the man they call Old Glitterballs, Richard
32:50Gott Ayoati.
32:51Laura, you're on tour at the moment.
32:53No, I'm going on tour next year, but it's on sale at the moment.
32:57Oh, I see.
32:58That's so weird that you brought that up.
32:59No!
33:00Now, look, there's been embarrassment in France this week as thieves broke into the Louvre
33:07and nabbed £76 million worth of jewellery.
33:11The heist involved stealing something called a furniture elevator, breaking a window, then
33:16taking the jewels while wearing high-vis vests, all in under eight minutes.
33:21Here's some grainy footage of the slow getaway.
33:23OK.
33:24Merci.
33:25OK.
33:27OK.
33:29It's kind of been the biggest news of the week.
33:30Oh.
33:31Have you been following it?
33:32Yeah.
33:33Old school caper.
33:34Proper crime.
33:35Proper crime.
33:36Yeah.
33:37Yeah.
33:38Yeah.
33:39Yeah.
33:40Richard?
33:41Yeah.
33:42Richard?
33:43Not the best security camera.
33:44That's the first thing I'd do.
33:45What do you guys think?
33:46It looked a bit like a stair lift, that thing.
33:47So I kind of wondered whether it was a protest against the accessibility of the Louvre.
33:51It's called the Louvre, not the Louvre.
33:52I did A-level French, mate.
33:53Did you?
33:54Louvre.
33:55Yeah, I got an E.
33:56We don't know who it is, do we?
33:57We don't know who it is.
33:58So I suppose the way to work out suspect is who suddenly needs millions of pounds who
34:03needs a bargain for this.
34:04What is that?
34:05What is that?
34:06I can't do.
34:07What is that?
34:08I can't do.
34:09What is that?
34:10I can't do.
34:11What is that?
34:12This is a lot of fun.
34:13I can't do.
34:14I can't do.
34:15What do you guys think?
34:16It looks like a stair lift, that thing.
34:18So I kind of wondered whether it was like a protest against the accessibility of the Louvre.
34:21It's called the Louvre, not the Louvre.
34:23suspect is who suddenly needs millions of pounds because they're being thrown out of a large property
34:30so the german manufacturers of the actual furniture elevator uh that was used in heist
34:36they were thinking like this is bad publicity right and then they turned it into good publicity
34:40they made an ad and put it out the next morning uh it looks like this it translates as when you
34:46need to move fast and then it says the device can carry quote up to 400 kilograms up to 400
35:02kilograms of treasures at 42 meters per minute as quiet as a whisper it did make us think though
35:09do you reckon you can get away with anything if you're just wearing a high-vis vest absolutely
35:13yeah yeah this is how you do it you go into ikea high-vis vest you ask staff to help you carry it out
35:20they won't suspect a thing that's how you steal do you reckon you'd ever fall for it if someone did it
35:25to you no i invented it well here's the thing and your first crime sprees in ikea
35:35it felt very specific like it's happened before look habitat is also okay susceptible
35:41so and what if you're a criminal who doesn't want to do up a house on a budget
35:47on a budget okay richard okay
35:51i'm sorry you high rollers with ikea so listen you guys don't know this but before the same
35:57anything after that sentence yeah yeah before the show we sent someone in high-vis to your dressing
36:02rooms to see if they could convince you to hand over your valuable oh this happened yeah
36:10okay let's see how it played out
36:20hi nice to meet you i'm harriet oh hi harriet uh i'm just wondering if i could grab your coat
36:25just to take up to the to the green room great thank you so much i appreciate it
36:44hi nice to meet you i'm harriet i've just come to grab your bike to take to the green room if that's
36:48okay because we're trying to store them in here anymore is that all right thank you so much thank you
36:59you're not getting anything from me
37:06are you living it mate she actually let me keep my gun
37:12also how irish am i i was like lady it's october i didn't bring a coat
37:16yeah yeah you're in your dress you're in your dress with all the windows open oh shame on me i can't
37:22go back to east london now there you go richard
37:36all right before you do that it's time to bring on this week's mystery guest before you laura
37:41before you bring on the mystery guest because this feature has been so popular me and alex have
38:01recorded now it's got its own theme tune yeah amazing okay love it laura i just have to walk back
38:07kiss what's difficult is that i just saw your bum for so long yes well i imagine being my wife
38:16laura catherine and richard have have to try to work out how the mystery guest is connected to
38:19the news uh can we have this week's mystery guest please
38:22hi uh josh and alex who's the mystery guest this is mona she's been in the news this week
38:39but why can we have the tense lighting change please
38:45how has mona been in the news because a she runs a london scream squad where people get together to
38:51just scream b she runs manchester eyebrow raising club where people get together to practice
38:57raising one eyebrow or c she runs a bristol spooning squad where people get together to have a spoon
39:05all right we're going to give you the break to think about this and when we come back after the
39:08break uh we're going to reveal the identity of the mystery guest screaming raising spoon it's just
39:13about parents in that isn't it i will also preview prince andrew's new lifestyle show at the end of
39:20our show uh we'll see you in a little bit uh welcome back to last leg uh the show that really
39:38loved having lily allen as a guest but now understands why her husband wanted his own
39:43dressing room uh we're joined by laura smith catherine bowhart and the man who puts the
39:47ha-ha-ha into the cha-cha-cha richard iowati oh really just quick a shout out uh joshua said
39:53he wants to give a shout out uh to his dad darren clark who used to watch the show with him every
39:57single friday but has since passed away since our last series and said if we mention him on the show
40:01it'll feel like he's still watching with his dad lots of love josh uh now before the break we challenged
40:13our guests to work out how this person was connected to the news uh can we have the options again
40:18please yes so does mona run a screaming club a raising eyebrow club or spooning club what are your
40:27thoughts you you can pick a different answer each if you like can you raise one eyebrow
40:31i think it's not that one she might need a club to develop she runs it really i don't know i guess
40:39if you can't do teach and what is your favorite place to eat in bristol i've never been to bristol oh
40:47really because i thought the spooning club was there okay so what's if we need an answer it has to be
40:54screaming screaming all right mona tell us why you're in the news hi i'm mona and i'm the founder of
41:00london's scream squad
41:04wonderful work nice really good thank you so uh when did you start and why um it all started on a
41:14random wednesday in the first week of october yep and within three days a thousand people showed up
41:19on primrose hill on the 10th of october whoa wow and what and did they just how long did you scream for
41:2645 minutes you said a thousand people do you mean a thousand women well are you doing it again we are
41:36doing it again we had our second event on the 18th at parliament hill and we've got another one tomorrow
41:42but it's a scream and run at battersea park oh you had me at scream
41:48and um uh do you get a certificate for participating you might need a lozenge afterwards but no certificate
41:56okay work on that mona thank you so much for being here good luck with the scream club
42:01uh josh has been cherry picking the best of the last seven days what have you got is your mum special or
42:14more precisely alex's mum special they were on romesh rangonathan's parents evening yeah she stole the show
42:22uh-huh would you like to see a proud mum hungry hung humbly brag to the nation about her son's
42:29intelligence yes please elaine was alex a big reader growing up he was he he read really early he was about
42:38four when he could read yeah and by the time he was five he got a bed with encyclopedias okay he comes
42:45across as a bit thick yeah really clever
42:54that's just we haven't got time we haven't got time we haven't got time would you like to see an
42:59insightful mum explaining why her son can't have spicy food before a show yes please
43:08he's not really a curry curry person because he's got a bit of a delicate stomach
43:15so what so so elaine what what happens he has a curry and then what sort of the aftereffects
43:23of that well then he's with the um what you call them basket pan
43:30and i hope that he ain't gonna do a job the next day yeah he's going through the eye of a needle oh yeah
43:36yeah he has got bad belly blessing blessing and is it really bad elaine yeah really bad yeah within half an
43:43hour of eating
43:47right would you like to see a disappointed mum tell the nation what she thinks of alex's career
43:55yes do you watch the last leg
44:00occasionally i do yeah depends who's on it okay
44:04well they do have some pretty shite guests sometimes yeah yeah i get that probably you should go on it
44:16yeah and sophie's been on it so yeah okay well you've just said if they've got some shite guests
44:21no no no not so did you watch it when sophie was on no she's very happy with the guest this week just
44:35let you know you know what your mum
44:45we asked you what video game we should make for prince andrew uh rob said crash randy coot
44:53ollie said escape from epstein island and dan said call of duty manager at pizza express in woken
44:59oh it's got me that one lovely um we're about to show you our trailer for prince andrew's new
45:04lifestyle show but before we do would you please thank our guests laura smith
45:11katherine boha
45:14and spongebob square dance
45:16and my co-host josh wittigan and alex brooker
45:27we'll be back next week with actor and activist jameela jamil and comedian joel
45:30dormit but right now we'd like to give you a sneak peek of what we think could be a new career move for
45:35prince andrew his very own lifestyle show thanks for watching last league my name's adam hills see
45:40you next week for the next week
45:49oh god it's gone everywhere there's nothing more important in life than being surrounded by friends
45:54and family or in my case just friends today i've got some old chums coming over for a straightforward
46:01shooting weekend and i'm preparing for their arrival by whipping up some of my famous fluffy pancakes
46:07here's how i like to do it can somebody please make me some fluffy pancakes yes sir
46:16now while that's going let's prepare a little lemon juice
46:22squeeze it harder you povo scum now if you're anything like me you'll have hundreds of these
46:29lying around the house and i don't like to waste anything that's why i've had mine turned into this
46:36lovely centerpiece smells like boarding school
46:47looks like the chaps are here i always like to give my guests a little surprise on arrival
46:51and since presentation is everything i've popped it in a fancy little basket there you go boys
46:56that's right it's a non-disclosure agreement sign the form come on in and keep your traps shut
47:04fucking fluffy pancake anyone
47:18this looks great this is everything we envisioned for this sketch and more is it actually is that a real cake
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