- 3 months ago
Will & Ralf Should Know Better S02E03
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TVTranscript
00:00Look at these tights, there's something wrong with these.
00:09Right, are you ready everybody?
00:15Performing for the first time tonight,
00:18Miss Ruby Lovington
00:21and Tiffany Blue!
00:30This is Will.
00:41This is terrifying! Slow down!
00:43And this is Ralph.
00:45I feel like a powerful badass.
00:47We've been mates for 20-odd years.
00:49Come here, let's have a snuggle.
00:51We might look like middle-aged blokes.
00:54Yeah, this is great fun.
00:55But really, we're just a pair of massive...
01:00...noisy...
01:04...kids...
01:05Where have you got that cake from?
01:06So what will it take for us to grow up?
01:08I'm really tired!
01:10...embrace modern life...
01:12Should've gone for some supple nails, like mine.
01:14...and become better...
01:16...let it one, we found a survivor...
01:18...maturer...
01:20...men.
01:21Look at these tights, there's something wrong with these.
01:23What a tune!
01:38Let's do this!
01:40Wait for it!
01:41Hey!
01:42Hey!
01:43Help!
01:44Come on!
01:47Come on!
01:52Can you do a fart with your armpit?
01:54Can I?
01:55Go on.
01:56Boo!
01:57You didn't work with telling you to shit yourself.
01:59You better check your armpit.
02:00I think you've leaked.
02:02Have you got any toilet paper?
02:03I need to wipe my armpit.
02:05Jesus Christ!
02:07That was terrible!
02:08I wouldn't have trusted that armpit fart.
02:10No, it's impossible.
02:11I don't dare pull my hand out in case these go shit on it.
02:14HE LAUGHS
02:23Right, you're supposed to be driving, right?
02:25And you're limping.
02:26What happened?
02:27I played football yesterday and I got injured.
02:29I've told you before, you're too old, give it up.
02:31Right, hold on.
02:32I was offered the opportunity to play against Paul Scholes.
02:35Would you turn down the opportunity to play Paul Scholes?
02:37No.
02:38No, you would not.
02:39You'd have gone on there with crutches if you'd have had to.
02:41That's true.
02:46Now, you're aware that for quite a while now,
02:48I've been going for pedicures and then having my toenails painted.
02:52I've currently got glittery blue and silver ones.
02:56So you played football with glittery...
02:57I did.
02:58I did.
02:59And, by the way, I was in the changing room getting changed.
03:01Nobody cared or said a word, apart from sometimes they go,
03:04oh, nice toenails, and I went, cheers.
03:06Oh, right.
03:07Right.
03:08And that's football, that's lads.
03:09Lads, lads, lads.
03:10Oh, yeah, sounds it.
03:11So I thought, I actually honestly think you'll really enjoy it.
03:14You've never been for a pedicure before, have you?
03:16What do you mean?
03:17We're going for a pedicure?
03:18Yes, we're going for a pedicure and you're going to love it.
03:20I get my toenails painted all the time.
03:22Does it make me any less of a man?
03:23Be careful how you answer.
03:32Good morning.
03:33How are you doing?
03:34Nice to meet you.
03:35Hi, Federico.
03:36Hello.
03:37Hi, Federico.
03:38Hello.
03:39I have a pedicure.
03:41That's great.
03:42That's great as he has it too.
03:43I've made him come along with me to get one too.
03:45Well done.
03:46It's going to change your life.
03:47Really?
03:48Let's do it.
03:49Have a seat.
03:51Let's see you shortly.
03:52Right then.
03:53Look at the state of your elephant front.
03:54I know, it's horrible, isn't it?
03:55It's horrible.
03:56Mate, I'm quite excited for you.
03:58Right.
03:59Do you know what colour you're going to get?
04:00Well, I'm having a cupboard.
04:01Yes, you are.
04:02What's I'm for?
04:03Who's going to see me feet?
04:04You.
04:05It's not for anyone else.
04:07What shape do you like?
04:08Square, round in the edges, round?
04:10If you know the answer to this, there's a problem here.
04:12I prefer the big toe to be a little squarer and the others to be a little more rounded.
04:17Okay.
04:18Okay.
04:19So men come in here to have their nails done?
04:21Mm-hmm.
04:22Before going to work?
04:23Like...
04:24Yeah.
04:25Or before even go holiday.
04:26Yeah.
04:27What are you doing there?
04:28It's posh cutie girl.
04:30Okay.
04:31It's the red skin.
04:32I think that's 48 years of gunt coming off your toe.
04:35What do you want?
04:36What are we going for?
04:37Yeah, you have a look at that one.
04:38We'll pick one for each other.
04:39All right, I'll pick for you, you'll pick for me.
04:41Yeah.
04:42Hang on, no, you're going to stitch me up here.
04:43Don't stitch me up.
04:44What do you mean?
04:45No, think about something that'll suit me.
04:47Mind you, what we're talking about?
04:49Just do with you.
04:51That was really cute.
04:54You were like, something that'll suit me.
04:56Wait, I don't care.
04:57That was a very telling moment.
05:00I feel like we just turned a corner.
05:03What do you think?
05:04It's not me, is it?
05:06I mean, I think it's actually very you.
05:08I'm not even joking.
05:09I looked open and I honestly went, oh, cute.
05:13Things have changed with you, Ralph.
05:15The thing is, would you ever have your fingernails done?
05:18No.
05:19Exactly.
05:20That's my point.
05:21Because if you're going to push yourself,
05:23get your fingernails done.
05:24Feels like a big statement.
05:26Ghost, there's no point walking round and people will see your hands
05:28and they'll make a judgement of you based on your nails.
05:31That is weird, isn't it?
05:32I've never thought of it like that.
05:33Exactly.
05:34It's all right then, we'll get our nails done then.
05:36If we're going to push ourselves.
05:37All right.
05:38What?
05:39All right.
05:40No, I was joking.
05:41But no.
05:42Why don't we?
05:43Because I thought you'd say no.
05:44I'm a little bit out of my...
05:50Out of your comfort zone, you brought me here.
05:52I know, but I was quite smug during the toenails
05:54and now I'm a little bit like, okay, we're going there.
05:57I don't think we should go for something as subtle as this.
06:00No, no, no.
06:01As subtle as it is, I think if we're going to go for it,
06:03we should be balls out.
06:04Balls out?
06:06I don't want to see that.
06:08Depends if we're getting painted.
06:10Yeah.
06:12It's a lot.
06:13It is a lot.
06:14It's a lot.
06:15There's not a great deal of subtlety to this.
06:17You see, you should have gone for some subtle nails, like mine.
06:23That'd be bad.
06:25I don't think people won't notice, let's put it that way.
06:28Really?
06:29Well, you've gone bald.
06:32Oh.
06:34How long have I got a wall like this for?
06:36I totally tried.
06:37We're already getting mucks.
06:40People, that woman's just giving us the right eyeball.
06:47I keep catching me own hands thinking who's of them hands in the mine.
06:50It just looked weird.
06:51Listen, I know what you're going to say before I say it.
06:54I'm going to say I don't like drawing attention to myself.
06:56You're going to say...
06:57Fucking hell.
06:58Really?
07:00Oh, yeah, you're a wallflower, you.
07:02I don't like drawing attention to myself.
07:04Doing some moonwalk on the fucking side of the road singing.
07:07Don't.
07:09As we left the nail salon, this is a genuine thing.
07:12You were walking ahead of me, and I saw two lads,
07:15and as you walked past, I saw one of them watch you like that,
07:18and then I saw him, I absolutely swear,
07:21I saw him go to his mate, he's like,
07:22I'm not just mate, he's gone.
07:26Did not.
07:27Yeah.
07:28And then they both watched you go like that.
07:29They watched you all the way around the corner.
07:31And I was like,
07:33I've got to walk past these lads in about ten seconds.
07:35Really?
07:36Yeah.
07:37See?
07:38Unwanted attention.
07:39When I was 16, 17, I was a labourer.
07:48I worked on a roof.
07:49I enjoyed it, actually.
07:51That's how I learned about being a man,
07:53and going to the pub, playing pool,
07:55in a really masculine environment, I suppose.
07:58So, today, I've arranged for us to go to a building site.
08:03What?
08:04I'm sure that's going to go down well.
08:05Fuck me.
08:06I bet they don't even notice it.
08:07Fuck me.
08:08You won't even bring it up.
08:09Oh, my God.
08:15Before we're allowed on a building site proper,
08:17we've come to Hertford Regional College for some training.
08:22First thing we've got to do is,
08:23we're going to get you in your PPE,
08:25because you've got to be safe,
08:26you've got to be ready to work.
08:28You're going to help me first, are you?
08:29No, I'm just getting the sides.
08:31Fuck, I've gone too far.
08:32I've gone too far.
08:33It's cataphysetic.
08:34I just want to pull the thing off.
08:36Jesus Christ!
08:37It's stuck on me fucking nose.
08:39I adjusted it.
08:40It went too tight,
08:41and me eyes started to bulge out of me head.
08:43It was like that film,
08:44you know, total recall at the end,
08:46you know, it's...
08:47It's on the red planet,
08:48his eyes are popping out.
08:49Seriously, don't.
08:50Okay, I'm helping.
08:51Seriously, don't make it tight.
08:52Seriously, the blood pressure...
08:53I can feel the blood in me eyes.
08:54Pull it off, Ralph!
08:55I've laughed at Will's helmet many times over the years,
08:58but I feel like only Will could put on a helmet so tight
09:01that it nearly chops the top of his head off.
09:04Fucking hell!
09:06I've ripped it!
09:11Twelve years of teaching,
09:12I've never known two blokes take so long to get changed.
09:14We've got to be out of here by six.
09:16All right!
09:17Before we lay any bricks,
09:18what we've got to get you to do is what we call bumping out
09:19or loading out.
09:20And we'll just literally
09:21put them on their shoulder.
09:22Right.
09:23Wow.
09:24Down.
09:25Fucking hell!
09:26That's heavy!
09:27Will, let's put it down carefully.
09:31Fucking nasty bastard!
09:33We are shite at this.
09:35That is a silo, okay?
09:37What have you got?
09:38That's it.
09:39I reckon even we might manage that.
09:40Oh!
09:41That's a madras.
09:42Swipe,
09:43and then do the bottom,
09:44the side,
09:45and that side.
09:46And so I just take a bit of that and just...
09:48Fucking fell off!
09:49So what we can see here,
09:50we've got the seesaw action down on.
09:52You want them all touching,
09:53yeah?
09:54Seesawing like bollocks here.
09:56It was hard,
09:57it was tiring,
09:59and it hurt me back,
10:00and I want to enjoy it.
10:02Fuck off!
10:03Look at it!
10:04Falling off!
10:05I can't even lay a pissing brick.
10:06It looks easy and therapeutic,
10:08but there's a precision to it.
10:10There's an art to doing it well
10:12that I have no appreciation of.
10:14This is what it's like having a real job.
10:16So the whole time we were there,
10:18me and Ralph together,
10:20laid 46 bricks.
10:23And the average is 6 to 700.
10:26I was exhausted.
10:28Honestly, I felt broken after it.
10:30I felt quite broken by it.
10:32I've never slept in a skit before.
10:34I kind of recommend it.
10:38I don't enjoy...
10:48Brick Lane.
10:49Brick Lane.
10:50And I don't think I enjoy hardly,
10:52but the thing about today is
10:54we've got to go and do it
10:56on the building site.
10:58God, are they just going to think
10:59we're just a pair of, like,
11:00mamby-pamby actors?
11:02See how you get on our world,
11:03TV boys.
11:05Right, stick some music on.
11:07Let's get us in the mood.
11:09What a man, what a man,
11:10what a man, what a mighty good man.
11:12What a mighty mighty good man.
11:14What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.
11:16What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.
11:17What a man, what a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.
11:18What a man, what a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.
11:20What a man, what a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.
11:22What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.
11:24What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.
11:26What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.
11:28What a man, what a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.
11:30What a man, what a man, what a man, what a mighty good man.
11:32This is the builder's life.
11:33That's what you get.
11:37We're at a construction site with a building's social housing.
11:40First up, we need to meet construction manager, Greeny.
11:48I'm Greeny. How you going, buddy? All right?
11:49Greeny, all right, mate. Will, all right, mate.
11:50Very good. What have you done there?
11:52I've never seen bricklayers with knives like that before.
11:56What do you think?
11:57The mines didn't really work much, to be fair.
11:59That is true.
12:00Blame him, it wasn't my idea.
12:01I quite like it.
12:02Right, first thing, you've got gloves?
12:04Yes, we have. Put your gloves on, cover them nails up straight away.
12:06See? Told you.
12:08We'll see, we'll see.
12:09We'll have a walk round site now and show you the site.
12:12Looking forward to this? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
12:14I'm in a man's world here now. You are in a real man's world.
12:16Absolute Billy bullshitter.
12:19Did you hear that?
12:20What? Looking forward to this? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
12:22Yeah, can't wait now. I'm here now.
12:25We'll make real men of you.
12:26Is there a bit of a community, would you say, in the bricklaying world or on the building site?
12:31My motto is, you walk the scaffold together, you come down the scaffold together, be a team.
12:36These are your best mates.
12:38Really? Yeah, like, I'm not being funny.
12:40I see the blokes I work with more than you see your wife.
12:42If you've not been on a site and you're not in the trade,
12:44I think it's fair to say there's a bit of a stereotype, all it's all hypermasculine.
12:48And I'll tell you what, listen.
12:50When we met you, we had a little laugh and you took the piss out of us.
12:53Now, with due respect, that's me your left hand.
12:56Oh, look, look, look.
12:57That's me your left hand.
12:58So, like...
12:59Oh, yeah, he's fine, he's...
13:00But, yeah, but, like, jokes aside,
13:02this, you know, you've got some, like, pretty jewellery and whatever,
13:05it's not necessarily the stereotypical thing.
13:08And you've got a couple of earrings in here, you know?
13:09Is that a new thing? Has that, like, has it changed?
13:12Yeah, it has.
13:12Be fair, when I first come into the industry,
13:15you could call dinosaurs, you know?
13:17It's not like that no more.
13:18Most bricklayers are the vainest people going.
13:20I faked that last night.
13:21I'm sorry, did you really?
13:25I faked that.
13:25You faked that for this?
13:27No, nothing is.
13:28Oh, yeah, oh, yeah.
13:30I'm not even wearing these anymore.
13:31These are fantastic.
13:33How dare you?
13:33My Alfred safety manager might say different.
13:35But, to be fair...
13:36I love that, mate. What was your impression?
13:38It worked for this. I faked out every week.
13:40They were about that. Yeah.
13:41And I was like, go on, Greeny.
13:43He's one of the bosses here.
13:45That opens the world up to, you know,
13:46if you want to have your nails painted, you can.
13:49We've had a good shot.
13:50There's nothing else for us to do here, is there?
13:51There is, actually.
13:52We could get you on the hods, load out 100 bricks,
13:55or the old-fashioned way with a hod on the shoulder.
13:57And I want these bricks there.
13:59I want a good standard.
14:00And someone's going to buy that house with a brick scooter laid on.
14:02Alright?
14:03Otherwise, you'll be giving me 70 pence each for each brick.
14:05Yeah?
14:06That is something.
14:07I hope they get a massive discount.
14:10Right, this is your team.
14:11Who are you working with today?
14:12Right.
14:13We've got Tegan now.
14:14Hello, Tegan.
14:15Hi, Tegan.
14:16Jack, obviously you met...
14:17What's up, man, Jack?
14:18Jacko.
14:19Boys, how are you feeding?
14:20Good to see you.
14:21Not great, Jack.
14:22And then you've got the legend.
14:23The one and only legend.
14:24The legend!
14:25The 72-year-old legend, that's why he's called it.
14:27Right, what do I want to do?
14:29I want to show them how they load the hod, lift the hods to load out.
14:32Alright?
14:33Get that and you use this to hold them in.
14:35Chuck it like that and catch it and put it on there like that.
14:38Okay.
14:39This is where you've got to get the strength.
14:44Is that like a shoulder?
14:45No.
14:46No, it is.
14:47Fucking hell.
14:48That's fucking horrible.
14:50I've got it.
14:51Go on.
14:52Go on.
14:53That's it.
14:54Come over to you a little bit.
14:55Yeah.
14:56That's right.
14:57See, it's comfy now, isn't it?
14:58Off you go.
14:59Yeah.
15:00Well, you...
15:01Yeah, it's just great fun.
15:02You're...
15:03What did you say you are?
15:0472?
15:05Yeah.
15:06How long have you been doing this?
15:08From me life.
15:09All your life?
15:10Yeah, since I was about 13, 14.
15:12Are you here because you just love it and it's part of your life?
15:14No, it's my hobby.
15:15Really?
15:16No, it is.
15:17Really?
15:18I do it, I do it because I like doing it.
15:20Yeah.
15:21I don't need the money.
15:22I like the firm.
15:23Yeah.
15:24I've known the guys for 30 odd years.
15:25Yeah.
15:26And that's why I do it.
15:27So, like, is this like something you've always done your family's done?
15:30My boy's doing it.
15:31He's been with the firm 10 years.
15:32But he don't want to be a bricklayer.
15:33Well, he wanted to be a dance teacher.
15:35He's done loads of plays and things like that.
15:37Oh, so he's in the acting game as well?
15:39Yeah.
15:40Oh, right.
15:41Yeah, he loves it.
15:42He does.
15:43Five's done it.
15:44Every time I go and see his show, he seems to be the best one out of the lot.
15:46He's a proper bloke's bloke and he supports his son.
15:49You know what I mean?
15:50And, you know, it reminds me of my dad.
15:53Listen, when he first went at school, he was in the hairspray and he was doing the ironing
15:59and singing.
16:00I was at the back and I was down in the chair like that.
16:03I thought, he's going to show me up.
16:05Oh, really?
16:06And he started singing and I went, is that marble?
16:09Oh!
16:10My dad was quite tough with me, but they supported me.
16:13And I know how proud he was when he saw me on stage and I think that's the same for legend.
16:16That's a proper Billy Elliot moment.
16:18Yeah!
16:19His name is Billy!
16:20Is it really?
16:21It's Billy!
16:22Right, we'd better leave some bricks.
16:24We're going to get sold off.
16:25OK.
16:26OK.
16:27Something's gone horribly wrong here, won't Mella?
16:28No, nothing I've done.
16:29That's never ten mil in a million years.
16:30That's ten mil!
16:31That's ten mil!
16:32I don't know.
16:33Jack, what's the problem?
16:34It ain't ten mil.
16:35How's mine look, Jack?
16:36Is it all right?
16:37Looks all right, mate.
16:38Thanks, Jack.
16:39Full joints.
16:40Thanks, Jack.
16:41Full joints.
16:42This one's a bit light.
16:43Let's give that a bit of a...
16:44Yeah.
16:45Tell him, Jack.
16:46I suddenly start to enjoy it.
16:47And then fucking Jack comes along and pisses all off the chicks.
16:49It's wank, this one.
16:50It's not wank!
16:51Don't ever go up the bricks.
16:52You're having to go up bricks and mortar.
16:53There's nothing they can do.
16:54They ain't got feelings.
16:55Do you want to finish off this wall?
16:56No.
16:57What do you think of this?
16:58It's good.
16:59I'm crap out of this, Tegan.
17:00How long have you been doing it?
17:01Two years.
17:02Two years.
17:03Yeah.
17:04Yeah.
17:05Yeah.
17:06Yeah.
17:07Yeah.
17:08Yeah.
17:09Yeah.
17:10Yeah.
17:11Yeah.
17:12Yeah.
17:13Yeah.
17:14What was the worst thing that you think would happen?
17:15Like, just people are just like, not thinking you were up to the job.
17:16Yeah.
17:17Like, making inappropriate comments.
17:18Like, just treating you weird with patronising you.
17:19Yeah, making inappropriate comments, but I've not heard any of that.
17:20Really?
17:21Yeah.
17:22Everyone I've worked with is lovely and they're so accepting of me.
17:23Oh, why wouldn't they be?
17:24Yeah, exactly.
17:25So you're just another member of the team.
17:26Yeah.
17:27You're just another member of the team.
17:28Yeah.
17:29You're young.
17:30A lot younger than we are.
17:31Modern world.
17:32We didn't know.
17:33Yesterday we got these done.
17:34Yes.
17:35Yesterday I got mine done.
17:36Please.
17:37All right, let's have a look.
17:38There you go.
17:39Oh, yours are pretty.
17:41Yeah.
17:42I should have gone for them.
17:43They're a lot more subtle.
17:44It's not about subtlety.
17:45It's about prettiness.
17:46Do you remember how to do this?
17:47Uh, sort of, yeah, I guess.
17:48Let's hope so.
17:49Let's hope so.
17:50Give it a go.
17:51Is this the button?
17:52Let's hope so.
17:53Let's hope so.
17:54Let's hope so.
17:55Let's hope so.
17:56Let's hope so.
17:57Let's hope so.
17:58Let's hope so.
17:59Let's hope so.
18:00Let's hope so.
18:01I'll press something.
18:02Is it on?
18:03Oh, that's not what you're opening.
18:04That's what we are opening, David.
18:05It's about prettiness.
18:06Do you remember how to do this?
18:07Uh, sort of, yeah, I guess.
18:08Let's hope so.
18:09Give it a go.
18:10Is this the button?
18:12Let's hope so.
18:13Press something.
18:14Press something!
18:15I'll press something.
18:16Nothing's happening.
18:17I'm going to...
18:18Open the thing is inside it.
18:19I can't open it.
18:20It's shut!
18:21Jack!
18:22Jack!
18:23All right, all right, all right, come on.
18:24I'll press the button.
18:25What's happening?
18:26Is it on?
18:27that's not a button
18:31oh my god you just had to clean the brick dust off it so i could see the oh my come on
18:37right go over there so i can pretend i didn't have to call you
18:41i want to be honest about how apprehensive me and ralph was coming into your world because
18:51even though we're performers or we work on tv and stuff like that
18:55you don't we don't know how people are going to treat us
18:58like all of us sitting around here we're normal people aren't we
19:00the main thing is about i've got it out of here is camaraderie and even if you come into work and
19:05you've had a bad day you've got something on your head or on your shoulders by the end of the day
19:08you'll probably be gone because someone would have spoke to you about it you'd have offload it
19:11have a chat you'd have worked out you'd have sweated it out you've been out in the fresh air
19:15i had a bit of a bust up with one of the older boys when i first started
19:20and uh we had quite a bad argument he was an old irish man and he was as manly as you could get
19:26and he come over and give me a hug and said like i'm sorry like we're all here to work i'm
19:30you know i mean i didn't want to be horrible or anything to you but i'm just having a bit of a
19:35shit time that's what i did taking ownership of that i just feel like that's not something
19:38would have happened 20 years ago yeah it wouldn't have done without it wouldn't have happened in
19:41our industry even you know yeah i've had grown bricklayers cry i've cried myself many times
19:46i mean most of my other job that we're a classic example with a job we had a date we had to hit
19:51if we probably hadn't hit that job it might not be in a firm i went in working with the lads
19:56to get it done we hit that date and we all you'd laugh 12 grown men cuddled on the scaffold
20:03once we'd finished it was built the project was amazing and i drive home and i thought about what
20:09we'd just done and i broke down and it meant something to me because we do care what we do
20:14we're here to work together build together and build something right and be a valuable part of a
20:20team you know
20:21come in boys and girls four o'clock you can all go home we're done
20:27yep let's go
20:30hello thank you for what you've done today you know thank you mate
20:32yeah no it's not shake hands cuddle mate
20:34so these hugs are missing something about the hugs you know thank you yeah group hug come on
20:38real media yeah this is what we do oh thank you very much yeah thanks everybody really
20:43thanks for coming you've been inspirational
20:45see you later
20:49i know we only met a handful of them but it feels like that entire industry has rebuilt from the ground
21:00up in an incredibly kind of progressive and healthy way yeah i know what you mean
21:06i've got a friend of mine who's a boy
21:08all right all right and he will avoid like the plague if you bring anything up about emotions
21:15he'll say it's all right box on that's what he'll say hey what'd you do box on get up box on yeah
21:21because it makes him feel uncomfortable himself talking about it and i think there's a lot of men that's
21:26feared if if i open this up in a pub or wherever and speak about how i'm feeling they'll just feel
21:30like what's wrong with you yeah i think i think what we found out there's a lot of people out there
21:35that'll be okay to talk about it when i lost my sister that that was that was a hard time and i
21:41felt like i had to be strong i felt i didn't protect her and i don't know how i could have but i
21:46felt i didn't and i was a brother taps into all of that so you felt that yeah i couldn't protect it
21:51and she looked at me as even though i was a younger brother i was a brother do you know something
21:56similar for me which i've only just has occurred to me as you've said that when i was a kid before i
22:02was you know with naught to ten my heroes like so many young boys were luke skywalker indiana jones
22:11superman you know heroes like and i always that's how i thought of myself this little boy this little
22:20hero you know and i think that the circumstances of how my sister died when i was nine yeah i wasn't
22:27there and i definitely now i've never thought about this till you just said that but i definitely now
22:32realized that there was a part of me that that thought even at that age if i was if i had been
22:37there i could have done something yeah at nine years old yeah well you box on don't you
22:45what's the alternative you know
23:04get my heated steering wheel off you dick
23:06you needed steering wheel it's 25 degrees outside it's like driving my child around
23:13fucking oh that was that adventure playground that was fun
23:20i had a very very blokey tough dad my dad was of the opinion that men bring up men and women bring
23:28up women yeah so when i was born i was like yeah oh yeah they wanted a boy but at the same time he went
23:35listen right now i've i've got him you sort the girls out to my mum it was literally like that really
23:43yeah and then and then i went can i go morris dancing he was like piss off and he stopped you
23:48doing it well but why do you think he put me in the boxing ring i think he was a bit frightened
23:51and he was like yeah give and take you can do the morris dancing but you've got you get it punched in
23:56the face i've been weird every weekend yeah i have been surprised about how genuinely uncomfortable
24:03the nails made you feel wearing these i'll tell you what if i walked into the pub and i had these
24:08i'm in bounds of being my pockets i i didn't think you'd love it but i didn't it it's it slightly
24:13bothered you and more than i thought it would yeah because it's like i didn't think you'd have any
24:19problem being a little bit like fabulous what you just said is perfect because where we're all on
24:24our way to now is something where we can explore not being ourselves into another world and to
24:32maybe you are what you wear you know we're doing a fashion show no we're gonna i would be terrified
24:39i'd hate to do it like a catwalk no no no we're not doing that we're gonna be drag queens
24:43see the nails you're already halfway there because i think once you put the gear on
24:53you'll become someone else and when i have somebody else my nails will be fabulous then
25:00we're here to meet esteemed drag artist pixie polite welcome hi c
25:05a leading figure on the british drag scene pixie is known for her powerhouse vocals
25:12camp humor and a standout run on rupaul's drag race uk
25:20should we go yes thank you very much fabulous after you pixie lead the way thank you ladies first
25:25you are correct what i want to know is what you want to get out of this experience and i heard
25:33someone say once that there's an inner dragon everybody there is yeah and i wanted to find
25:38out who my inner drag was well we're going to find out today how would you best explain what drag is
25:44you know drag is for the gay community um and the queer community in general it's like our church
25:51drags are our vicars we preach in our own way to the audience you know especially if you think back
25:58to the aids crisis like i think british drag is a very unique sensibility because back in the day
26:04we were dropping like flies and some of the only joy you could have is going to see a show that night
26:08and laughing and forgetting about your friends dying you know the queens they developed a sharp
26:13tongue they they became very witty they had to clap back because that was their defense mechanism
26:18against a world that wouldn't accept them you know we're going to be at the royal voxel tavern
26:23that is one of the oldest amazing drag bars in the country terrifying you know there's
26:30the royal voxel tavern yeah what an honor what an institution we've got to be good though oh
26:35shit yeah the ghost of lily savage will be there watching you oh my god she used to perform there
26:40back in the day really i know there's a lot of pressure
26:43right come on in boys i have some very special to introduce you to before we start this is chameleon
27:00chameleon and i are going to help you find your drag find your character find your aesthetic and
27:07figure out who you are as a drag queen okay i don't know who i am as a me never mind
27:12neither do i baby neither do i that's why i'm a chameleon and everything and i'm a mood i'm a
27:16color a vibe i like that you're a vibe i'm a goddess we know you love vibes wow i love that
27:24they're speaking to me already speaking to you oh yeah oh my god i've got the legs for it can i
27:32tell you what i'm feeling for me what i've always i've always liked divas like 80s and 90s divas big
27:37okay okay we've got to walk the walk before you took the talk well i'm not saying i know what i'm doing
27:41get the shoes on oh careful now with those ankles she might be down but she's not out
27:47you're gonna put some on as well okay this is not that bad do they feel like a diva shoe because
27:52i'm they whoa she's down i mean i struggle with the shoes must have been it's like i was on a boat
28:00i'm all over the gaff you just have a lean on that table these feel
28:06fucking sensational i feel like a powerful badass i saw those boots and they seemed like the most
28:14sort of outrageous let's do this kind of thing should we have a proper look through let's look
28:20up wigs there we go do blunts have more fun i don't know i've never seen myself as a blonde before
28:29look like patsy from a mad fab hey i can embrace that can't walk i'll just be patsy these aren't
28:38the tights are actually the worst bit to be honest difficult to get on but they do make my legs look
28:43nice so beauty is pain look at these tights there's something wrong with these definitely
28:48couldn't have joined the royal ballet just in case i was thinking of it it was the tights that was the
28:53problem pull everything up it'll hold it in place yeah i can see you doing the action
29:02bigger hips i see where you're going there i see okay yeah you pop these on and then we'll get one
29:07on the other side okay look at that bum look look at that bum oh my good god i felt like how i walk
29:17and how i am and me as a person dissolved away the more layers i put on into the drag i don't want to
29:24be will i want to be this other person i want to be the the drag version of me i want to be fabulous
29:30now you've got your body gives you more of a sense of i think i need what you want to be
29:35we're thinking like sequins sparkles oh it's going oh drag queens love a stretch fabric it's all about
29:43play we're playing dress up we're finding who you are what is that that is that not it no that's
29:51definitely not it my character my persona loves showing a bit of skin loves being looked at very
30:00very confident in her own body do you know what i look like someone from greece like hercules i put
30:08the costume on and the wig and i found that i had like a 90s 50s posh woman living inside me that
30:15came out who'd have thought that i wonder if she'll turn up on the night we'll have to wait and see
30:21she's finding her sea leg is it me or is it what movie
30:43now that we've tried some stuff on how do we feel about what we want to present on the stage lip sync
30:48and go for it dance wise why don't we pick a well-known empowerment anthem something that'll help
30:55you feel sexy and powerful in drag could you show us a little bit of what you do on stage and we can
31:00take some points from you let's hit it
31:13and then if you're really that confident you just want to drop like this that's the end of me
31:21that's it i'm not getting at all come on let's have a go maybe yeah okay here we go
31:33ah
31:36she is worth every penny get ready to spin right now
31:43i think i'll work here stuff i think you're ready thank you very much you're going to smash it i
31:53want to we want to make you proud we want to make you proud thank you very much
31:57i love it once that music starts and the spotlight is on me and you are off and for that moment
32:14we're live do you know what and that's it we're in do you know what we're going to be we're going to be
32:18like okay how's this going to go okay here we go adrenaline adrenaline we're going to start it's going
32:22to go by in a blur and then we it's going to be done and we're just going to be like ah hopefully
32:28either that or i'm going to break my ankle we're going to because with our drag debut looming it's
32:35time to get made up hello hello hello hello how do you make this look good well i mean that's the
32:46age-old question it's already good we're just going to make it a bit more glad
32:50i'm in your hands you do what you think looks right i'm just going to stick some of these
32:56hairs back can i ask how long does it usually take you need to get ready and make up if it's
33:02for the show we've got two hours two hours two hours for a quickie then we could do it within 15
33:09minutes now it'll have to be very dark though there is a lot of glue and white going on your eyebrows
33:18will miller you look like the phantom of the opera yeah get your mask on can we have a little chat about
33:25our names i i i don't think i've got a name yet i feel like i'm a shining diamond or or it's like
33:32someone who's passed it crystal fabergé oh that feels quite you but i felt i feel like i should be
33:39french and i can't do a french accent you gotta think more northern are we liking ruby rimington
33:47it's a little tug in cheek it's like very that old sort of glamorous angle as well because i want
33:52to be glamorous but also a key to her past miss ruby rimington ruby rimington feels very you
34:00i never thought i would ever feel like a classy woman and as soon as i put that gear on and i put
34:09the outfit on and the wig i felt like i was this older woman oh i want to be called tiffany tiffany's
34:18a great name oh yeah tiffany just came to me and it feels right it's cute a bit playful and the more
34:23flamboyant i am the more i draw attention to myself the more outrageous i am so the better it feels
34:29liberating well you're breaking out of like the shackles of like what life it is and can be you
34:34know and what's expected of you exactly yeah and it's it's not just about the dressing up it's you
34:40know drag especially in the uk i think in times of adversity it's it's just about taking the mickey out
34:49of what is expected of you in society and for gay men especially you know taking that femininity that
34:56you're ridiculed for and saying okay if you're going to call me feminine and call me a little girl
35:02yeah i'm gonna take that myself and make it my own repackage it yeah yeah i get that i totally get that
35:10look goes now how far we've come i've only just noticed my lips and i am loving it somebody's fabulous
35:19i can't breathe i can't stand up everything's gonna be fabulous miss ruby rimmington is a hollywood
35:49actress she maybe only had a few roles you might not have seen her a lot but quite a few people
35:53have felt her and she'd let you know tiffany blue arrived fully formed almost from the moment i put
36:02these on she's got it she flaunts it she's very comfortable in who she is and it's like why why hide
36:08who i am welcome to the stage the gorgeous camille leon
36:13is
36:27oh my god what's going on
36:29it's weird it's like the drag finds you
36:59when you put the layers on you sort of become it they love us drag is something you become
37:06it's not the clothes you wear it's something that comes from inside and then you just become it and
37:11it happened and that's what i took onto the stage
37:23this one's very exciting my loves they're my new drag daughters
37:28everybody would you like to know who our two drag versions are today
37:33it's ralph little
37:39and will menner
37:42performing for first time tonight
37:47miss ruby rubyton and tiffany blue
38:01parties
38:03and now we got new rules for you
38:07thank you
38:10all y'all y'all y'all up in here
38:12and me gonna come grab us at home
38:14all right
38:17hey
38:21It's funny because Tiffany Blue
38:51Felt like she was a lot younger than Ruby Remington
38:54I was trying to teach her the ropes of being a drag queen and she was a bit too wrong
39:00She had to give her a few taps on the bum. I was like I told you classy
39:04It's a funny turnaround because it will ended up being like the sensible demure one
39:21Not to me
39:23Rock and rock and rock and rock and rock and rock
39:28And rock and rock and rock
39:31Masculine to me is power and I've never felt more powerful than I did dress like this on that stage
39:37I've been doing this job for 30 years
39:39I don't think I've ever been as immersed in a character as I was tonight
39:47I'll tell you what's hard in this outfit, everything
39:51I've not had a piss for five hours
39:52My dick and balls are somewhere down there but I don't know where
39:54It's even harder to pick up a brolly
39:56Just try and bend down, but we got there
39:59It was really euphoric
40:05This might actually be a little new avenue of work for me
40:09It is an absolute privilege to do this in such an extraordinary building with so much history
40:35Yeah
40:36And we really appreciate it
40:46More than like
40:47Dude more than believable
40:49I want to do it again
40:50Enjoy it
40:51Like five times
40:52That is one of the most amazing things I've ever done
40:55The reason why I wanted to perform as a kid was for that feeling
40:59For that
41:00There's nowhere else you get that kind of feeling than being on stage
41:03But tonight was extra special because it was like a transformation
41:08I was somebody else
41:10I'm glad we took it seriously
41:11I'm glad we give it everything because this community deserves it
41:15They're amazing at what they do
41:17Hello, love
41:18Hi, babe
41:20Come and meet the queens
41:22Bye, Tiff
41:23I hope we meet again
41:29There she goes
41:35Wow, wow
41:36Oh, you alright?
41:37You were better than that than being bricklayse
41:39I love you too
41:40I didn't know I was going to be
41:41I think my dad would have been proud
41:43To see me
41:44Man, my dad was a proper man
41:45You know what I mean?
41:46What you would class as a proper bloke
41:47He was proud of whatever I did
41:50It's just one of the things
42:04I'm a performer, that's what I do
42:06And he supported me
42:07For a fear to stop me at a young age
42:10You know, and said, you're not going to do that son
42:13I would never be doing what I do now
42:15And having these experiences in life
42:19Drag has revealed to me
42:21That the world is a more fun place
42:24When we aren't constrained by ideas
42:27That aren't necessarily true or set in stone
42:31And we can just kind of be free and just do fun stuff
42:35I would have said before this
42:37I'm a typical masculine bloke
42:39But I don't think that's true anymore
42:41I think there's so many different sides to me
42:43I find myself in different situations
42:46Being different people to fit into how they see
42:49What a man is
42:50And I shouldn't
42:52I'm proud of who I am
42:54I like performing
42:56And I like doing different things
42:58It doesn't make me less of a man
42:59Or less masculine
43:00Oh my god
43:02That's just my toes
43:05Stop
43:06Stop
43:07Look at these gaffs
43:08We're going to make our own cowboy film
43:10Oh
43:12This is terrifying!
43:13Slow down!
43:14There's no chance we're going to be able to do that
43:17Well, you've got to let go
43:18It's horrible, Ralph
43:20I can't do it
43:21I would like to shudder from
43:24The highest mountain to tell the world
43:28I've been loving what it means to me
43:34But all around there's violence
43:39And those who make me think to me
43:43Maybe one day they will understand
43:50There's more than what's enough
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