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00:00Sonic the Hedgehog 1 Movie. Novel.
00:04It starts out saying that what I assume is Sonic has to go fast, and then it says faster than a jet plane,
00:10and then it keeps on repeating itself, replacing the words jet plane, until it says he needs to be faster than lightning.
00:17So that's padding right away.
00:19And it uses the excuse that it's a first paragraph to try to justify taking forever.
00:24It says he's got missiles on his heels.
00:27So it's a good thing it starts out a little exciting.
00:30He tells off Eggman, who he calls Doc, like Bugs Bunny, that he's trashing public property.
00:37Saying Doc is faster than saying Robotnik. So good.
00:41And it won't make as much sense to call him Eggman when he's skinny for no good reason.
00:46So we only do it because it's faster.
00:49Eggman was already skinny in the UK continuities before he turned evil.
00:53So there's no point in doing it again when the novelties worn off.
00:57It wastes time saying that the shards of breaking glass fall in slow motion behind him.
01:04It has to mean it's slow motion from Sonic's perspective because he's got fast reaction times.
01:10Because that's the only way he wouldn't crash into walls.
01:13He curves his path, and he runs over the San Francisco Bay.
01:17It wastes my time and says he can feel the first heat seeker barreling down on him.
01:23How can he feel it?
01:25It must be especially hot.
01:28It's established that Eggman has bad breath to spite him for being evil.
01:32But I already read this in the UK novels, so the novelties worn off.
01:37It also mocks him as having a weirdo mustache.
01:41He's supposed to have one.
01:43Next you're gonna tell me they didn't give his actor a fat suit right away because they hated that Eggman's fat because it's bad.
01:50By that logic, why even include him at all?
01:52Because him being evil is also bad because evil is bad.
01:56He's supposed to be evil.
01:57My point is, it's better to just insult a bad guy for the stuff he does wrong.
02:03Because taking pot shots at his looks makes you look bad and not taking what he's doing seriously.
02:09It describes the egg-shaped pod behind him as craziness because of Sonic's point of view, when he's new to Eggman.
02:17It says he can't stop wondering how he got here and where the adventure all started.
02:22He doesn't have amnesia.
02:24So how would he wonder that?
02:25It wastes my time and reveals that Earth's not Sonic's home planet, and it's not a place where he's supposed to exist.
02:34This is because a non-fan can't find it believable that talking animal people of multiple species would evolve on a planet similar to ours because our planet didn't happen to have that happen.
02:44So I get it.
02:45But it's more unique to not be like this.
02:47Oh well.
02:49It's good that his planet isn't called Earth, though.
02:52There's no reason to call his planet Earth.
02:54It's lazy and confusing.
02:56It long-windedly gets into a flashback to an island full of greenery.
03:01With no other name given, and the majority of the series using Mobius because it was Sega policy back in the day.
03:07It's common sense to use Mobius by default.
03:11What's the point of not using it as if you're western-a-phobic if you're not going to give it a better name?
03:16And you're having two worlds anyways.
03:19It couldn't be Sega's fault they didn't, because they couldn't even stop them from giving Sonic inaccurate, bad, unnecessary redesigns from not getting his appeal.
03:27It doesn't need to say it has waterfalls and beaches.
03:32It's nice that it says it has loops.
03:35It wastes time until it explains that an owl woman called Longclaw was the last of her warrior kind.
03:41So the owls are a lazy rip-off of the echidnas instead of an idea from Whole Cloth.
03:46Anyone can take an old idea and change it.
03:50The owls were dedicated to maintaining balance for all living creatures.
03:55What does that mean?
03:56It doesn't explain.
03:58It doesn't say that they fought imperialism like the avatars.
04:02So did they start killing any species that got overpopulated?
04:06Because maintaining balance could be making sure every species has a similar amount of people.
04:12It says the owls protected their world.
04:15The only ways you could protect the world would be either fighting imperialism or destroying anything that damages the environment.
04:24But it doesn't say that.
04:25So I don't know if they were evil or not.
04:27At that point, it'd be better to not even bring up how they were.
04:31It feels like it's stretching to try to make them look good.
04:34By default, they don't look good.
04:36Because you're supposed to assume that every adult owl is fighting a war instead of having normal jobs.
04:42Or at least being hunter-gatherers or farmers.
04:46After it wastes my time saying what I already know about Sonic's planet, which the writer was too lazy and uninvested in to name.
04:55It says Longclaw raised Sonic.
04:58After some redundant padding, it says that some believed his powers would unleash chaos on the world.
05:04But I'm not told if this world has an electric grid he could wipe out with a sonic boom.
05:09Usually the adaptations with two worlds assume that there is no technology not from Eggman.
05:15So that's likely to be the case here.
05:18So these people had no reason to think that.
05:21They were forced by the movie's writer to think that.
05:24And when writing is forced, I have to wonder what the meta reason for it is.
05:30And it looks like it's that the writer thought people wouldn't sympathize with Sonic right away if he didn't use
05:36he's a victim of discrimination as a shortcut because he thought people would be off-put by default by his looks.
05:44So he was an idiot who didn't think and projected how he felt on Sothers.
05:48If he had used his brain, he would have known that people liked Sonic for decades without needing to be convinced by a sad backstory.
05:57Because his personality alone in him fighting a villain is cool.
06:01Did he not see the appeal in him being cool?
06:04It's creative that Sonic was discriminated against.
06:07But since the excuse for it makes no sense, and all it's used for is an unnecessary excuse for why Sonic lived on a private island.
06:15Why do it if you'll barely use it so you don't make up for it being sad?
06:21The reason they hated him should have been that they're religious.
06:24So they see his speed as in being possessed by demons or working with them.
06:29I was going to say jealous, but logically that'd already be a thing normally.
06:32And he's still popular.
06:34Meaning that only a small percentage of people would be that petty.
06:38After redundant over-explaining, it says that the only chaotic thing about his life was his hilarious pranks.
06:45I don't like the idea that this so-called hero would prank his mother and find it hilarious.
06:51When it's not even explained that she's got the personality of Knuckles or Antoine.
06:56So it's not for a relatable reason.
06:59He's just not a good person.
07:01It says wind whips through their old hut.
07:04And Longclaw reached for a sword.
07:07And she was dumb not to think it was anyone but Sonic.
07:10Even though it was just established that Sonic's the only person who's this fast.
07:16At least it implied it anyways.
07:19People thinking his speed would bring chaos would only make sense if there were already other fast runners at that point.
07:25And they did nothing but steal with that speed.
07:28So they assumed he would too.
07:29There's no way he would though.
07:32Because he's supposed to be a hero.
07:34The protagonist.
07:36An actual good person.
07:38But why should I assume that's canon to it when it wasn't explained?
07:42When even the people who say they like this movie feel the need to say it wasn't a masterpiece and wasn't supposed to win Oscars.
07:49Which is always a red flag.
07:51Sonic taunts her as he leaves the bed covers.
07:54And after it reminds me what he did redundantly.
07:57She scolds him and leans on her weapon for support to be relatable to people who need canes.
08:02And says that he can't bounce around the island because someone might see him.
08:07I thought the whole point of her moving him to an island where the narration said it could run around like a normal kid.
08:13Was that it was a secluded place.
08:15And thus he could do that.
08:17But then the script forgets that to have her scold them anyways.
08:22If people moved to the island she should have moved with them.
08:26So she's stupid.
08:28He says no one saw him because he's too fast.
08:31So he's also stupid.
08:34Because people wouldn't know it's him because of the fast blur.
08:38Unless he's really not the only fast person.
08:41He says he wanted to bring her a sunflower gift.
08:43But this should have been his establishing character moments.
08:47Because this is nice.
08:49One measly sentimental moment won't brainwash me into thinking he's a good character though.
08:54I still remember his pranks.
08:57Why did he even want to give her a flower if he thought pranking her was funny?
09:02One second he doesn't care about her feelings and is sadistic.
09:05The next he does want her to be happy.
09:08That's crazy.
09:09But Sonic's adopting him which we didn't even see what she said when she chose to.
09:15She never said or did anything that endeared to me.
09:18So why would I care that you gave her a flower?
09:21She hears something and my time's wasted until she protects him from arrows with her wings.
09:26And flies through the weak roof with him.
09:29And Sonic just barely sees the echidnas aiming for them.
09:32So anyone who's okay with this, why would you still complain about there being other echidnas than Archie?
09:39Both continuities have the same thing in common where they weren't all wiped out thousands of years ago.
09:45And it demonizes them by saying they were core's vicious cousins of hedgehogs.
09:50As if they're somehow all like that.
09:52It's more realistic that echidnas aren't reduced to one left by plot contrivance.
09:58But I always hated that the movie demonized them yet again instead of being creative and had them be Mayans or whatever again instead of being creative.
10:07Why not some other culture?
10:08Why make it echidnas then?
10:11It wouldn't look lazy if it was another species.
10:13Do they not care that portraying Mayan-coated people as being all warmongering monsters with outdated weaponry multiple times reveals an utter lack of respect for Mayans?
10:26Why don't they just have the echidnas be the ones who are in charge of protecting the world?
10:32Then Longclaw would be a little more interesting.
10:36It's lame that the movie's version of Mobius is so aggressive that it has archer armies.
10:40If it was respectful of Mayans or echidnas, it portrayed them as modern, or better.
10:46I'd want Sonic's plan to be a good one, because I'm interested in the series.
10:52That's why I wanted to have a name.
10:54It says the hoods these ones wear show their allegiance to the warlords who had chased Sonic his whole life.
11:01So not all of the echidnas have an allegiance to them.
11:05And his world is backwards enough to have warlords steal like it's ancient Mongolia.
11:10It says they wanted to unleash the chaos energy in them and overtake the world.
11:15How do they think they can?
11:17A magic artifact?
11:20It says that by visiting the far side of the island, he'd led them home.
11:25Pretty dark that it insisted on confirming that it was Sonic's fault.
11:28For no reason.
11:29Is he going to actually do anything with that, or just be using it for worthless shock value?
11:36After some redundant stating of the obvious by the narration,
11:40Longclaw gets hit by an arrow while flying and falls.
11:44It sure was unlucky that an arrow managed to hit her while she was moving.
11:49And moving fast, too.
11:51When that's insanely unlikely requiring her to get hit by an arrow that wasn't originally aiming correctly.
11:56She could have gotten hit by the arrow the very second she told Sonic to get down.
12:02Which is what I thought would happen.
12:05Anyway, Sonic rises to his feet, and the narration states the obvious redundantly.
12:10Even though she doesn't have much time,
12:13Longclaw's somehow dumb enough to take a while to get to her point
12:16that people will always be trying to get his power.
12:20So he has to stay hidden without her.
12:22It makes Sonic sympathetic for a bit when he goes into denial and tears up.
12:27Just reading him saying no wasn't enough for me.
12:30The tears were actually necessary to make me find this especially sad.
12:35As in, almost Maria's last words tearjerker said.
12:39So it's a good thing they weren't forbidden by Sega
12:41from making Sonic overly emotional when it's justified by the context.
12:46Because who would be able to relate if he didn't?
12:49Sonic says they'll shock the echidnas until they decide to leave them alone.
12:54Because he's got electricity powers in the movie.
12:57Which is creative and new.
12:59It'll only be good if they factor into the story in a good way.
13:04It also implies that the scriptwriter didn't think Sonic as he is
13:07would be appealing to the general public because he didn't get Sonic.
13:11But I don't know for sure.
13:13It depends on whether he thought it was necessary.
13:15Longclaw tells him it's too late for that.
13:18Which is just vague.
13:20So I have to assume it means that she thinks she's doomed.
13:23But he isn't.
13:24So she should also say it won't change their minds.
13:28She says he doesn't want to do nothing but kill people his whole life who won't leave him alone.
13:33It wastes my time.
13:35And she says that to keep himself from being used as just a pawn.
13:39He has to use the small portable warp rings from Archie Sonic to travel to another planet.
13:44Where its people are ignorant of the larger universal order.
13:49Which is a vague and weird way to put Sonic's got useful power.
13:53It's validating for Sonic fans that there's Archie style warp rings here.
13:57Because it means there is such a common sense intuitive idea that they would independently come up with the game.
14:03If it had Sonic simply get 50 rings to make a giant ring appear and jump into it.
14:08That would still require them doing something new.
14:10Because it had to establish that you could get to other universes from the special zone.
14:15So might as well do this.
14:17It's a way of interdimensional travel that aesthetically looks game like.
14:20Which is charming.
14:21It says she showed him how they worked.
14:24But then it says she always warned Sonic that their powers were finite.
14:29So first I imagined her as telling him how it worked.
14:32But it turns out the narration was saying that she told him that in the past.
14:37It also does the sadie at mistake of having rings disappear after a while for no reason.
14:42And this time they disappear way faster after you use them.
14:46So that it actually matters to the plot.
14:48Because the ring is going to disappear as soon as he warps away with it.
14:53At first it sounds like a lame version of the Archie warp rings.
14:56But all it not disappearing would mean would be that Eggman might have gotten his hands on it eventually if it didn't.
15:02So it might actually be good.
15:04And he never would have needed it again after that anyways.
15:08It says it works by him imagining a place he wants to travel.
15:11It doesn't at all have to do with the name of the place.
15:14I thought it would.
15:15And it will so the narration should have said that it will matter.
15:20Otherwise if he imagines a hill.
15:22Then how would it ever determine which hill to send him to?
15:26This is why Archie established that you have to know where you're going in order to warp to a place with them.
15:31It says that after being used the ring would expand to warp him.
15:36Of course.
15:37But then disappear.
15:38It says he didn't have many rings left.
15:41Wait, he has more than one with them?
15:44I thought he only held one.
15:46I never saw the movies.
15:48I just vaguely remember how the plot of the first one is based on reviews.
15:52The story wastes on being redundant.
15:55When Longclaw starts coughing I can't take it seriously because it seems to be just done because of a cliche.
16:01Because while getting an arrow to your side gives you whooping cough.
16:05She tells him to go to Earth.
16:08How is she aware of Earth anyways?
16:11What compelled her to go there?
16:13I guess it's because she hated her own planet because echidnas were there.
16:17If she thought it was possible to stay secret on Earth and already knew about Earth.
16:21To the point of knowing what humans can do.
16:25Then she has no excuse for getting hit by the arrow.
16:28Because she should have avoided it by going to Earth with Sonic in the first place.
16:33She had no logical excuse not to.
16:36Why would she prefer her own planet when it's got echidnas looking for Sonic?
16:41After redundant words.
16:43She shows him a planet with giant mushrooms that's called empty.
16:48Why don't she make him go there instead?
16:50It's weird because when he makes it clear he'd rather talk to a few humans because he's relatable instead of incapable of feeling lonely.
16:58After some redundant dialogue.
17:01Longclaw tells him to trust no one.
17:04If she actually thought there was no one trustworthy on Earth he'd meet.
17:08Then she would have told him to go to the mushroom planet.
17:10Because based on the word empty.
17:12We're supposed to think it has nobody.
17:15Already we've got two reasons the whole story never should have happened.
17:20And they wouldn't have been brought up if Sonic always lived on Earth.
17:24And always had other people like him on it.
17:27After redundant narration.
17:28It's justified why Sonic stayed in hiding for so long.
17:32Because Longclaw tells him to promise her he'd make himself go crazy from solitary confinement.
17:37Because at least he'd still get to survive his whole life.
17:41Or at least longer than if he revealed himself right away.
17:45So he'd still have a little fun every day and have freedom.
17:48So in theory it's the right thing for him to tell him to do.
17:51Because the alternative's worse.
17:53After padding.
17:56It says that the story really began when Sonic finally met his only friend in a place called Green Hills months ago.
18:03And I have to assume that the reason the Warp Ring decided to take him to Green Hills specifically.
18:08When there were billions of Green Hill areas on Earth.
18:11Was that this place has the same name as the place it grew up in.
18:16It goes to the point of view of Tom Wachowski.
18:19Even though he's a boring character I have no reason to care about yet.
18:23So that's dumb compared to sticking to Sonic's point of view.
18:27It never describes what he looks like.
18:30It takes so many boring paragraphs to get out of detecting Sonic on his speeding ticket radar.
18:36There's really nothing to say about what happened before that.
18:39It shows him being relatively bored and lonely enough to talk to a turtle in a plastic donut on his dashboard.
18:45And I'm talking to those things were the only non-boring parts of this.
18:50His last name reminds me of Mike Wachowski.
18:54So I wish he had his last name instead.
18:57Him being a cop tries to make him interesting.
19:00But it doesn't if all he ever does is be bored at a town's only speed trap where nobody goes by it.
19:06Which must be because everyone in town knows about it from word of mouth.
19:10So the police force must be really stupid for not deciding to change the location of the speed trap.
19:17It took almost a whole page to get some detecting Sonic.
19:21At first he's got the rational assumption that his radar must be breaking if it reads over 200 miles per hour.
19:28Why would Sonic move so slow?
19:30The speed of sound is over 700 miles per hour.
19:34The radar didn't even care enough about Sonic to look up the speed of sound.
19:39The radar goes off again with a higher number.
19:42Why did Sonic run back the way he came near him?
19:45Tom grips his wheel thinking a tornado might pick his car up.
19:49If he thinks that's gonna happen, he would hold down the gas pedal instead.
19:54It's inconsiderate of Sonic to do this.
19:57After padding, he sees a shadow zip across his rear-view window.
20:03I don't know why it's called a mirror.
20:05After padding, he points his radar in the right direction.
20:09And the radar once again reads a higher number.
20:12Why didn't Sonic go that fast right away?
20:15After blatant padding where Tom inexplicably wastes time talking to his plastic donut first before leaving the car,
20:22a swirling dust cloud kicks up around him, and his radar keeps going up.
20:29Then the wind blows him onto the gravel ground, which would hurt.
20:33The radar gun can't even clock the speed this time.
20:37How did it do that to begin with?
20:40They weren't made to be able to detect stuff going at over 280 miles per hour.
20:45Because no car was made to do that on the streets.
20:50After padding where he talks again as he stands up,
20:54he finds out Sonic stole his plastic donut for no reason.
20:58Our hero.
21:00Imagine if this happened to you.
21:03How am I supposed to like him?
21:05A character having a sad backstory doesn't make him a good person,
21:09and it shouldn't work as a shortcut to likeability.
21:13Sonic is supposed to be an anti-hero,
21:15but for reasons that are relatable or admirable.
21:18And kleptomanias neither.
21:21I can't come up with a reason for why the average person
21:23who isn't always doing the right thing could relate to this.
21:27Not like Sonic insulting stupidity or enjoying praise.
21:31Neither of which proves you're a bad person,
21:34because it's universal.
21:35Why does it say his plastic partner was more absent than usual?
21:41Instead of just saying it was absent when it's not absent usually.
21:46And you can't just be a little absent.
21:50After padding, he follows the wind in the direction it went.
21:54He walks off the slope where the grass is flattened,
21:57and he walks into the woods and so it stops in the middle of a hillside.
22:01After padding, he sees something bloom.
22:03Why doesn't it say it's a blue hair?
22:07He picks it up and it shimmers like something electrified,
22:09but doesn't hurt.
22:11And it's as long as his forearm.
22:13He assumes that he's gone crazy and that getting out of this town will solve it.
22:18Sadly, after this is boring instead of cutting to a good part.
22:23I thought he was gonna find Sonic.
22:25He could have found the quill at the same time as him.
22:28There's just padding until he hears a scratching behind his trash cans.
22:33I guess the reason he says trash pandas instead of raccoons is because he's trying to cope by using humor.
22:42He walks inside to see his girlfriend Maddie reading a book in a yoga outfit.
22:47But the writer's too lazy to tell me what colors the outfit is.
22:50I don't even know what she looks like.
22:54I'm picturing her as having brown hair right now.
22:57And shoulder-length hair.
23:00He calls her a doctor, so again I have to assume he's talking like that to try to make a joke.
23:05Trying to make him jokey at least tries to make him entertaining as an apology for being boring looking
23:11and having no magical powers with special skills.
23:15So he's got two personality traits instead of one.
23:18I'm still getting used to it because it catches me off guard every time after how depressing Sonic's backstory was.
23:25It comes off like his jokey dialogue and maybe everything lighthearted after the backstory was a second draft.
23:32Because people's reactions to the first trailer were freaked out about taking itself seriously.
23:37This was so long after 06 that it wasn't always just when people scared of a story like that.
23:44For the other people it was because Sonic looked bad.
23:47I don't really have a problem with the jokey dialogue so far.
23:51It's no wonder because it's not being said by someone who knows something seriously dark's been happening in the place he's in.
23:58He doesn't look callous.
24:00Tom asks what the most humane way to kill raccoons is.
24:04Which would keep him from having to constantly upright his toppled trash cans so that's smart of him.
24:12But the dialogue gets stilted.
24:14Because it keeps talking after that and talks in a slightly wordy way about wanting to set an example to the raccoon's family.
24:22Maddie tells him not to hurt any raccoons.
24:25Establishing herself as having a personality trait.
24:28And the trait is that she's especially compassionate.
24:30I guess she won't offer any alternative solution.
24:35And she doesn't.
24:37I assume that if you put your outdoor trash cans inside they'd sync up the room.
24:42So that's why they don't just do that.
24:44And I guess he doesn't have room in his tool shed for them.
24:48Because that would fix it if they just closed the door.
24:51She holds up an envelope from the couch.
24:54And after a bunch of padding.
24:56Tom reads a letter from the San Francisco Police Department.
24:59Addresses him about his application to it.
25:02And he's excited enough to squeeze it.
25:04Which can be relatable.
25:06And he finds out he was accepted.
25:08So they kiss and dance around the kitchen.
25:11So I'm happy for them.
25:13It sure is convenient that he didn't send his application a month ago or something.
25:17Because then the plot wouldn't have happened.
25:21Even though he was horribly bored just as much a month ago.
25:25She brings him a cake she baked him after tossing out the backup cake that was meant to comfort him in case he didn't get the job.
25:32Which is a dumb joke actually.
25:34Because she's wasting food when she could have just gotten rid of some of the icing and covered it up.
25:39And it explains that she never really doubted him and always supported him.
25:44Instead of being the stereotypical nag female love interest like Wanda from Fairly OddParents.
25:49So that's impressive.
25:51She'll need more character than especially nice to be great though.
25:56After some padding he hears a smashing noise and runs towards the door to see the lid from his overturned trash can rolling away.
26:04And that's it.
26:05So that was a waste of time.
26:08I thought he was going to meet Sonic then.
26:10The last scene was like,
26:12But the story doesn't really begin until after he meets Tom.
26:17Have him meet Tom then.
26:18I'm sensing a lot of padding in this movie.
26:21It explains that Sonic gets himself almost caught for the thrills.
26:25It wastes a bunch of time after that over explaining this when it could have explained it in one sentence.
26:31Since he's the main character, why weren't we told this right away?
26:36I'm glad it's not just that he's doing this to prank people.
26:39Instead he wants to get close to them.
26:42How was I supposed to know that when his backstory established him as a prankster?
26:47It's padded out until he explains that he has the day's haul.
26:51Meaning that he steals for no reason every day.
26:55Why did that get written?
26:59Imagine if that happened to you.
27:01Imagine if your Game Boy was gone.
27:05It makes no sense that he'd turn out like this just because he kept himself alone for I don't even know how long it was.
27:10I assume he was four when he lost Longclaw.
27:14So that's just from my vague memories of people's ridiculously positive reviews.
27:19The novel made no effort to explain how old he was.
27:22So I was just picturing him as the same age as he is now.
27:25He says way past cool long after it stopped being current slang to give fan service to fans of the first cartoons.
27:32They deserve it.
27:34Especially since their demonization has been put online since the internet became popular.
27:39I don't like people who literally stand the cartoons.
27:42But demonization isn't the answer either.
27:45But when Sonic said way past cool in the 90s it made sense.
27:49It was because he's young.
27:51So he had to talk in their slang to be cool.
27:54Him saying this now only has an appeal in the meta sense.
27:57Because in-universe it makes him look like a dork who watched too many 90s shows aimed at minors recently.
28:04And not enough modern stuff to know it's outdated.
28:07Why?
28:08Why would he steal DVDs of 90s shows when he could watch modern TV when people aren't home without stealing?
28:15And it's still wrong because it'd cost them money and electricity by having their TVs on.
28:19But it's not nearly as wrong because usually a bigger electric bill isn't as stressful as losing your stuff.
28:25Thus not feeling like the rest of your stuff is safe anymore.
28:29Maybe buying an expensive home security system.
28:33He runs up a hill to a cave.
28:35And there's more pointless narration.
28:38What's the point of repeatedly reminding me he's never been caught when that's self-evident?
28:44There's a lot of boring pointless words after this.
28:47It shouldn't be referring to his stuff as his if he stole it.
28:54It says his cave has posters of places he wanted to run to but could never risk going to.
28:59Why not?
29:01And it never explains.
29:04Nothing bad happens when he tries to go anywhere in this town.
29:08So why would he think it'd be different to anywhere else?
29:11Like as long as he keeps running he's safe.
29:13After padding it says he had to settle for listening to music in this town.
29:20Why?
29:21There's no reason he wouldn't have seen all of the world by now.
29:24There's also no reason he wouldn't have set up a permanent home here.
29:28Because he needs a place to store all the stuff he steals.
29:32There's a lot of different places he could use for shelter.
29:35It references that they have good chili dogs here.
29:37So that's nice.
29:38And what's that supposed to mean when he's never tried the chili dogs anywhere else?
29:44He tries to pretend he's playing the guitar like Underground Sonic.
29:48So that's good.
29:49And he slides into a dresser and a sack lands on his head hurting him.
29:54There's more pointless padding after this.
29:57Where the story states the obvious as he admits that he's just using humor to distract himself from loneliness.
30:02How did the writer think the audience was too stupid to assume that?
30:08What's the appeal of stories that think viewers are morons?
30:12The same applies to it having Sonic wonder if he's going crazy from isolation because he called Tom his friend.
30:19For unknowingly helping him sail out of the spotlight.
30:23How would he be needed for that?
30:25All he has to do is run away and he doesn't get in the spotlight.
30:28It should have shown us him helping him sail out of the spotlight.
30:33There's pointless padding that states the obvious at times.
30:37Where the story repeats itself by having him again talk to himself like he's talking to someone else.
30:43Not only has he already played baseball with himself before the movies, but it's boring how he comments on it.
30:49It turns out he can throw speed energy.
30:51I guess it means his electricity.
30:53So that's now.
30:54It's a little more interesting than him hitting a ball with the bend.
30:58Because when he hits it, he sends shockwaves across the field.
31:03There's some padding until the fact that no one was there to cheer for him makes him despair that he's alone forever.
31:09And start running around the baseball field for literally no reason.
31:13Why doesn't Sonic just run straight ahead and not stomp?
31:17Because we need the plot to happen.
31:19I get the idea that it thinks making him keep it simple and sit there crying would be out of character.
31:25The land ship has sailed, so stupid reasoning.
31:29But the idea is that this is a more Sonic-like way for him to deal with being so sad.
31:34But Sonic wouldn't run around a baseball field non-stop.
31:37He'd just keep running ahead.
31:40What if he runs into a pool?
31:41I guess if he did that instead of concentrating his speed energy in one place, the rest of the plot wouldn't happen.
31:47So that's inexcusably forced plot progression again.
31:52If he has Green Hills memorized, he could know where he could run non-stop straight ahead without running into something.
32:00So that's not it.
32:02The story over describes him doing this when it could just leave it at that.
32:06Until the entire baseball field explodes for no reason.
32:10Even though he didn't want it to.
32:12Knocking Sonic off course as a massive wave of blue energy shoots up and out across the sky.
32:20And then everything went dark.
32:22This phrase he made me assume he passed out.
32:25But the writing after that doesn't act like he did.
32:29After some padding where he states the obvious.
32:33He finds out it caused a blackout for the entire town.
32:36A town that'd have a hospital.
32:38I've been told that a blackout would kill preemie babies in the ICUs there.
32:43Our hero.
32:45I'm sure the script writer didn't care about the Sonic series enough to think of that.
32:48But it's never said not to be true.
32:50So he killed 491 babies.
32:55Next up is part two.
32:56Let's go.
32:57Okay.
32:57Let's go.
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