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EastSiders Gay Theme TV Series

Drama, Romance, Comedy, Action, Fantasy, Crime, Thriller

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Transcript
00:00I don't know, it's like 4 a.m.
00:30This ain't fine.
00:32Fuck me.
00:33I'm trying.
00:35I'm supposed to be at the gallery.
00:37That was to open today.
00:39It's a lot of responsibility if I'm not there.
00:42What?
00:43Nobody will be there.
00:44Nobody is ever there.
00:46We sell everything online.
00:48It's been like a week.
00:50Yeah, well, today might be the day.
00:54Who knows?
00:55Door busters.
00:56People die.
00:57People can trample.
00:58I've seen YouTube videos.
01:00We'll see you at lunch.
01:02Lunch.
01:04Yeah, Tom.
01:06Lunch.
01:08My mom's coming into town and we're getting lunch.
01:10But I got scheduled for work.
01:12You give it up.
01:13Nice try.
01:14But you give it up.
01:15You call somebody right now and you give up your shift.
01:17I know.
01:18Give it up.
01:19Yeah, you will.
01:21Nope.
01:22Nope.
01:23Sorry.
01:24What are you doing?
01:25No.
01:26Just a minute.
01:27Yeah.
01:28Yeah.
01:29Oh, I gotta go.
01:30Seriously.
01:31I'll do nothing.
01:32Yeah, we're gonna do nothing to like it.
01:33Okay.
01:34No.
01:35No.
01:36No.
01:37No.
01:38No.
01:39No.
01:40No.
01:41No.
01:42The end.
01:43No.
01:44No.
01:45No.
01:47No.
01:48No.
01:49No.
01:50No.
01:51No.
01:52Hey, um, I was wondering if you could take my...
01:55Yeah, I know it's lunch, it's just you're my favorite.
02:01Alright, fine.
02:0320 bucks.
02:19Do we have any ice cream?
02:22No, I'm sorry.
02:23What about pizza rolls? Do we have pizza rolls?
02:26No, sorry.
02:28I think we have some kale.
02:30I always date hipsters.
02:32We're all the same to you, huh?
02:36Hey, no, this is likely my longest relationship, you know.
02:40It is?
02:41It's shocking, right?
02:43Well...
02:43Okay, come on.
02:45You know it's shocking.
02:47It's my shortest, actually.
02:48Really?
02:49Yeah.
02:50Two with Sarah.
02:52Mm-hmm.
02:53High school.
02:54Three with Tian Ming.
02:56Two with Dawn.
02:57I mean, I don't really date people, so, you know.
03:00You could date another Asian girl?
03:01Oh, yeah.
03:03Is she Chinese?
03:04I don't know.
03:05Dawn and Sarah are both Korean.
03:06I could date you for two years, maybe.
03:12Yeah, I could do it.
03:13Maybe even three.
03:14I think I could do it.
03:17Well, that's the limit, apparently.
03:18Maybe even more.
03:19I don't know.
03:20I think I'd like that, kitty.
03:25Babe, what's the matter?
03:32Are you crying?
03:33No.
03:34Yes.
03:35Maybe.
03:36I just have a lot of emotions, okay?
03:38Don't pay any attention to me.
03:40Are you upset with me?
03:42No.
03:43I think we have to go to the bathroom.
03:45I don't know.
03:49Everything okay, babe?
04:06Oh, yeah.
04:09I'm just, uh, really happy.
04:22Where is he?
04:23He's on his way.
04:24He's just texting.
04:25He texted you?
04:26The two of you text?
04:26Well, we're not telepathic, so, yes, we text.
04:29Well, your father and I, we never had to text.
04:31That's because texting hadn't been invented yet.
04:33I beg your pardon.
04:34Texting was around for a few years before the divorce.
04:36Thank you very much.
04:37You know, I've always been very tech-savvy.
04:39I tweet.
04:40I have an iPad.
04:43And, Calvin, really, how are things between the two of you
04:46since Tom published his little expose?
04:48Okay, it wasn't an expose.
04:49An expose is a form of investigative journalism.
04:52Well, he was certainly investigating something, wasn't he?
04:56There he is.
04:58Hi.
04:59Let me look at you.
05:01That sweater is a brave choice.
05:04You need a haircut.
05:06I know.
05:07And you need a drink.
05:08I do.
05:09Another, darling?
05:10Oh, I'm okay, thanks.
05:12That's settled.
05:12Cynthia, three gin martinis.
05:14Extra dirty?
05:16Extra gin.
05:19Cynthia?
05:21Cynthia?
05:22I love gin.
05:25Cynthia?
05:25Cynthia?
05:26I love California.
05:30Just the weather, the culture, the gay rights.
05:33Well, technically, gay rights aren't the best.
05:36Almost gay rights.
05:38Cal, I have an amazing idea.
05:40Why don't we all take a trip next month up to Maine?
05:42I mean, it's beautiful in the summertime, and you and Tom can get married.
05:46Wait, what?
05:48Spooked you.
05:48But seriously, though, I mean, I'm not surprised that the two of you are opening up your relationship.
05:55Or what?
05:56Please, I read your little expose in France magazine.
05:59Well, I think it's perfectly natural that a man, certainly two men, would want to do something a little different before settling down.
06:07Your father and I...
06:09It's all bad having sex.
06:10I don't want to hear about dad having sex.
06:11Well, I have sex, too.
06:13I'm a woman, and I have sex.
06:15Yes, we are very well aware.
06:17Damn good sex.
06:19Okay, for the record, I just want you to know that that story was fiction, so we're not opening up our relationship.
06:26Well, you're not cheating on each other, right?
06:28I cheated on your father, and it was the worst thing that I mean...
06:32Mom, stop saying things, please.
06:34Hey, just because you're gay doesn't mean every woman in America is going to stop having sex, okay?
06:37Wait, you're not saying that you're breaking up, right?
06:42Oh, no, Val.
06:43Val, I promise you're not breaking up.
06:46You know, because that would actually crush me.
06:49It would just destroy me.
06:50Mom, just stop.
06:51I love you, Tom.
06:52Stop, please.
06:53Stop, Mom, please.
06:54I can't believe I have to drive back to Phoenix tonight.
06:57You're driving back to Phoenix tomorrow.
06:59I am?
07:02Well, that's good news.
07:05Cynthia!
07:07No, no, no, no, sorry, sorry, sorry.
07:13Yes, he's kidding.
07:14Yes, he's kidding.
07:37Gallery.
07:50You didn't answer your phone, asshole.
07:54I'm working, assholes.
07:55Who am I?
07:57I just got your mom on the stairs.
07:58He's probably raiding the minibar.
08:01My boss is staring at me.
08:02I bet he is.
08:04I bet he's, like, undressing you with his eyes.
08:06Come on.
08:08I bet his eyes are, like, kissing their way down your neck, chest, six-pack.
08:14I don't have a six-pack.
08:15All of you have, you are a cock.
08:18Okay, after this morning, I sincerely don't ever be in the mood for that ever again.
08:21Thank you very much.
08:22Yeah, our, uh, hours are 9 a.m.
08:245 p.m. Monday to Friday.
08:265 p.m.?
08:275 p.m. and you come straight home, you nasty.
08:30Thank you very much for your call, sir.
08:32We look forward to your visit.
08:39Cal?
08:40What are you doing here?
08:52Um, looking at the art.
08:54Why?
08:55This is an art gallery.
08:57Okay, this isn't a museum.
08:59This is a place of business.
09:00This is my place of employment, actually.
09:03Hmm.
09:05Okay, well, I don't even know your last name.
09:07Um, so excuse me if I didn't know that you worked here.
09:11I just like art.
09:13Well, thank you for supporting the arts.
09:18You should probably be leaving.
09:20Huh?
09:20Well, what if I want to buy a painting?
09:24Okay, well, too bad.
09:25This is a photograph.
09:26Hmm.
09:27So.
09:28Well, this one's interesting.
09:32So buy it.
09:34It's 800.
09:35Well, it's kind of awful, but I like it.
09:40Thanks.
09:42Thank you very much.
09:48Is that Tom?
09:50Did you take all of these?
09:58No, no.
09:58Just this one.
10:00Oh.
10:00That's kind of the pity spot reserved for the front desk guy.
10:05You know how to pick him?
10:07Apparently.
10:09Well, I do like it.
10:12I do.
10:14Well.
10:15You should probably be leaving.
10:17I should probably be leaving.
10:18Yeah, probably.
10:19Yeah.
10:19You know, I...
10:20I haven't heard anything, um, from Tom.
10:25Uh, you know.
10:26So, well?
10:28I thought you'd like to know.
10:32Between his cell phone, email records, and his work schedule, I think I've got my bases pretty covered.
10:37You know, short of getting a microchip to the vet.
10:42I'm not crazy.
10:44I'm not.
10:47I just don't see why we can't be friends.
10:50Really?
10:51I'm sorry.
10:52You're fucking crazy.
10:55Oh.
10:56Yeah.
10:57You're fucking crazy.
10:58I'm sorry.
11:06You really hate me.
11:08Yeah.
11:09No.
11:14No.
11:20We should probably be leaving.
11:28Ex-boyfriend.
11:34Sorry.
11:35Rough breakup?
11:37Oh.
11:37Kinda.
11:39Recent?
11:40Sort of recent.
11:41Is he crazy?
11:42No, he might be crazy.
11:44Harassing you at work?
11:45Come on.
11:46He's desperate.
11:48He should be your fucking catch.
11:51Thanks, boss.
11:54I mean it.
11:56Kiddo.
11:58Go back to, um, I don't know, whatever it is you do around here.
12:14Hi.
12:15Hi.
12:16Thanks for taking Mom back to the hotel.
12:17Oh, no problem.
12:19My pleasure.
12:21She made me do a shop at the minibar.
12:23And then she made me promise to cut my hair.
12:25That's Mom.
12:27How was work?
12:27Well, not eventful.
12:32I'm gonna be your man.
12:39Take your clothes off, Lord.
12:41I'm gonna take my hand by the hand.
12:47Gonna lay it down.
12:52I'm gonna be your man.
12:54I'll do all that I can.
13:06I'll do all that I can.
13:11Oh, I'll do all that I can.
13:18Oh, love is so hard.
13:22Even after the dark.
13:27I'll be all that I can.
13:30I'm gonna be your man.
13:32I'm gonna be your man.
13:35I'm gonna be your man.
13:37And I don't care that they say you're gonna run away.
13:57If there's still a crowd around you at the end of the day, baby.
14:01Yeah.
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