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Beasley Digital
  • 4/17/2025
Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a listener who has had his sex life improve after his wife started reading erotic novels and Andy realizes he could make a fortune if he started writing fried chicken inspired erotica.

Category

😹
Fun
Transcript
00:00you can always reach us through email that's the best way to get in touch with us if you have a
00:07comment question concern something strange going on in your life email at daveandchuckthefreak.com
00:12this first one comes from a woman um she says you're probably wondering about the email subject
00:18the subject is book porn versus video porn he says me and the wife just had a newborn
00:24and we haven't really been having fun the last year i work nights well i come home the other
00:31night and my wife was all over me i guess she started reading this sexual book porn
00:37and apparently it works better than video porn well let me tell you it paid off best beeger since
00:46we met i'm currently running on no sleep about to go for a fifth round and then back to the night
00:53shift love you guys making himself tired my god all the guys are going to be gifting
01:00no i'm sure they want to know the book what's this through your mom knows day yeah i bet she does
01:07i wonder why she reads them huh since are there gay versions of these books oh god
01:13there's got to be gay erotica dude there's such a market for it wouldn't it be uh that might be my
01:22retirement plan gay erotica not gay erotica but just erotica in general
01:27and he's gone into gay erotica what if i'm like what if i'm good at writing gay erotica
01:34oh my god i bet you would be i bet i could do it you can write
01:38you can write you don't know what a guy wants
01:41you know he's a war-winning gay erotica writer yeah whatever i look you up years from now i'm
01:46like what ever happened to andy green you don't know he has the biggest house in the united states
01:51i got a series called two guys
01:55i did it
01:58welcome to the the manor that a gay erotica built
02:04oh no hold on a second i'll move this giant pile of money lisa sit down
02:08i remember the day he told me all he did was
02:12he wrote from his heart and he pretended that one of the guys was him and the other guy was also
02:20him yeah i was just making love to myself yeah and it worked my god it worked i've made a mint
02:27remember the day it came to his mind we were there we were there we were there i'm so tired i didn't
02:34even realize i was just sliding in there at the gay erotica part i really that sets them up for lisa
02:38so i went on to this little erotica site and they do have uh gay male men loving men oh sure
02:43yeah of course in fact that's huge there's like night almost 20 000 gay males you better you better
02:49get a niche i think yeah i'll have to come up with a gay erotica pseudonym you will oh yeah what
02:53will andy's gay erotica author name be that's gotta be that'll be fun to yeah create yeah that i'm
03:00really i gotta come up with some good ideas rum guzzler 69 jesus that's terrible dave that's a
03:07terrible author name no no jason the jew said the colonel call yourself oh that's i like that
03:13the colonel as a colonel yeah it's the colonel it is the colonel and imagine you were talking about
03:23gay men like fried chicken there you go that's how you can put the passion into it that's how you
03:29i'll be like oh my god i'm like like i'm pushing a billion you guys yeah he writes one of the
03:38characters is himself the other character is kentucky fried chicken what's your secret that's
03:45your right about the colonel taking me i saw him across channel my passion for the colonel
03:50i put it in the books yeah and then after you just change the colonel's name to trevor i take how
03:57i feel about fried chicken and i put it in there and i swear to god it's a home run yeah the gays
04:03eat it up every time you're looking good it says that all the time in it it's crazy
04:08look at that i bought all that egyptian stuff yeah where'd you get that i just have the money
04:15now it's nuts that's from king tuts too no way dude yeah tootin common yeah tootin common
04:22isn't that crazy uh that's bizarre i can't believe it i can't ever let my terrible secret out that like
04:31i i channel my love for fried chicken i'm like hold on daddy's gotta go to work and i got a bucket
04:37and i'm like all right colonel let's do this i'm like yeah
04:41every single uh the copies that are sent to the editor they're just covered in grease
04:52my manuscript is really really greasy i apologize about that but it's my method
04:58this is uh andy's new gay erotica is entitled 11 herbs
05:0111 guys named herbs 11 guys named herb yeah that's it the 11 herbs the 11 herbs
05:0911 herbs oh it'll get spicy i'm telling you just changed little bits it's not i mean like
05:18it's not far-fetched jokey and stuff but i mean come on i think that might be an easy buck dude
05:25because i could sit there and say some nasty things about oh yeah i know i'm sure you could
05:31heave in and drip in and oh how wet how wet he is oh yeah juicy how juicy just just hot
05:39how hard hot just crisp in your hand yeah yeah drumsticks yeah yeah skin yeah covered in his own
05:49gravy wow my goodness imagine trying to explain to your dad what you do
05:56what do you mean you're writing about chicken sex
06:00you're talking about having sex with colonel sanders
06:05and you made a million dollars and you were able to buy egyptian items
06:11straight out of the pyramids boy
06:14i'm like yeah
06:16i don't care what you do son i love you
06:20he'd be happy
06:22now i could use a bit of cash
06:24yeah he'd be like can i borrow some money
06:26can i borrow some of your chicken money
06:28i need some of that gay chicken money
06:29i need lots of
06:30someone text it to make sure you don't forget the dark mean
06:34it's real of course it writes itself andy
06:38it does it really does it writes itself
06:40oh it's incredible i never thought about you
06:43you got gravy everywhere oh and i would
06:45i know goodness i know there is gravy all over his face
06:49um

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