00:00I'm Wren and this is my partner, Gerdon.
00:02My life lets me sleep with Ben.
00:04We get death threats, we get people trying to call CPS.
00:07We have an open relationship.
00:09I've always known that I was bi.
00:11People truly don't believe that bi men exist.
00:14Your husband is gay, you mean gay.
00:16No such thing as a guy who's bi, just gay.
00:18He's gay, super gay, you mean you have a gay husband.
00:21A lot of throw up emojis.
00:24I wanted to ask, where do you see this going long term?
00:28It's like, do you think that we'll have an open relationship forever?
00:34I'm Wren and this is my partner, Gerdon.
00:36And I let him sleep with other men.
00:38We met on Tinder.
00:39Well, I immediately thought she was way out of my league.
00:42She just looked really sweet and genuine.
00:44I thought you looked a little bit of a d-bag.
00:47My plan was to hit it and quit it.
00:50Neither of us were looking for a relationship.
00:52And I don't know, from that day, it's been incestual.
00:55Yeah.
00:56We were both married previously.
00:57So I think for us getting into our relationship,
01:00we wanted to do it right.
01:02I've always known that I was bi.
01:04So I think for me, it was more just like
01:07being able to have a safe place to accept that.
01:11He came out, what, like a year and a half
01:13into our relationship as being bi.
01:15And I think for us having deep conversations,
01:18it was kind of me being like, babe, I think you might be bi.
01:21And that was kind of what led to us being in an open relationship.
01:25We would have experiences with single men
01:27and have experiences with single women
01:29and give each other the freedom to explore that.
01:32I never get judgment for being a bi woman,
01:34but he consistently gets judgment for being a bi man.
01:37We've had multiple 3 million, 5 million videos
01:41of us going viral for being bi,
01:44basically for him being bi.
01:46We go live on TikTok all the time,
01:48and we get flooded with hate.
01:49Sometimes we get death threats.
01:51We get people trying to call CPS.
01:53I can't stop laughing.
01:54Your relationship's a joke.
01:56Why get married?
01:57I really don't believe this bi thing.
02:00He's more into himself than he is with you.
02:03Go to church.
02:04I can't unsee this.
02:05A lot of throw up emojis.
02:07This makes me want to chug bleach.
02:09Your husband is gay.
02:10You mean gay?
02:11No such thing as a guy who's bi, just gay.
02:14Oh no, he's gay, super gay.
02:16You mean you have a gay husband?
02:17I mean, it goes on and on.
02:19It's just every comment is hate.
02:23I'm having an off day, and I'm in my head.
02:25Of course, these comments don't help,
02:27but most of the time I'm able just to brush it off
02:30and realize that these people aren't very happy
02:33in their own life.
02:34People truly don't believe that bi men exist.
02:37They think that it's only something
02:39that can happen for women.
02:40I think it's crazy.
02:41I'm over here supporting you,
02:43and we have a very healthy, happy relationship.
02:46The first three years of us being in an open relationship
02:49was kind of rocky,
02:50because you're exploring boundaries,
02:51and you're figuring out what's going to work for you.
02:53Back in the day, we had rules of no kissing,
02:55no eye contact, don't call him baby,
02:58don't call him daddy.
02:59It wasn't anything that he was doing, per se,
03:02that was making me feel jealous.
03:03It was my own insecurities,
03:05and so I think the more that we worked on that together,
03:08the more that we kind of got over jealousy.
03:10Everyone's going to experience jealousy,
03:12but I think that's how you work through it.
03:14I actually like being jealous.
03:16We travel once a month,
03:17and most of what we go to are called hotel takeovers.
03:20So essentially, a company will rent an entire hotel,
03:23and it's a three- to four-day party.
03:26So you really just get to go and be free and authentic.
03:30There's playrooms, there's...
03:32Playrooms are great.
03:33So we're going to go meet up with my mom for lunch.
03:35What do you want to wear?
03:36My sense of style, how would I describe it?
03:39I like bright, neon things.
03:42I like tight-fitting body suits.
03:45You wouldn't even think that a man could fit into that.
03:49I like to be comfy.
03:50I like to show off a little bit.
03:52I always say it's a little bit homeless,
03:54but a little bit stylish.
03:55Homeless chic?
03:56Yeah, homeless chic is my style.
03:58He's such a humble person,
04:00and actually really shy,
04:02but his fashion is the complete opposite,
04:04because he wakes up every day and puts on a crop top.
04:07In the summertime,
04:08he's wearing booty shorts pretty much every day,
04:10and he's got a nice...
04:11I started off with wearing crops to the gym,
04:14and once I realized,
04:15hey, you know what?
04:16People really don't care.
04:17I just started gradually getting more aggressive.
04:20I don't get any slack in public.
04:22It's mainly online.
04:24People will be like,
04:25oh, you wore that in public?
04:26Well, I mean,
04:27he's been kicked out of three gyms
04:29for what he wears to the gym.
04:30They're like,
04:31why did you steal your wife's shirt?
04:33Do you guys share clothes?
04:35I love tight-fitting clothes on men.
04:38I think that it accentuates their assets, you know?
04:41I like that he can express himself,
04:43and he can be comfortable expressing himself.
04:46Today, we're going to meet up with my mom
04:48to chat about our relationship.
04:49A little bit of nerves there, for sure.
04:51What about you?
04:52Are you feeling nervous at all?
04:54A little anxious.
04:56Lauren is my daughter.
04:57She's my firstborn.
04:58I would just like to ask my daughter and Durden,
05:01you know,
05:02are they happy?
05:04So, when I came out to you
05:06as having an open relationship,
05:08how did you feel about that?
05:10Well, at first,
05:11there's always concerns, you know?
05:15Like, how are other people going to respond to it?
05:18Or what kind of impact that's going to have
05:20on some of our closer family members?
05:23Also, I believe in the power of self-expression fully.
05:28And I wanted you to be true to yourself
05:33and have the life that you want to have.
05:36And the fact that you have someone to share that with
05:39who is just as open and understanding,
05:42I mean, I don't know.
05:43It gives me a sense of security.
05:45Yeah, you're kind of like us fighting a person
05:47that's, like, accepting.
05:48I wanted to ask,
05:50where do you see this going long-term?
05:54Yeah.
05:55Like, do you think that we'll be in the lifestyle,
05:58like, have an open relationship forever?
06:01Um...
06:02I mean, not forever,
06:04but probably, like, in our 60s,
06:06I would still see us having a lifestyle like this.
06:09I definitely foresee us always being open,
06:12always being, like, in the community.
06:14Maybe not going to, like, events.
06:16Yeah, or, like, will we always, like, share forever?
06:19I don't know, probably not.
06:20Maybe, like, 60, 70 and...
06:23Jealousy is definitely something that we've had to navigate
06:26in our relationship, uh, 12, 13 years.
06:29I feel like the first three years were our hardest years.
06:32It's hard to admit you're jealous sometimes.
06:35Being able to admit that helps.
06:39So, I've got a question now.
06:41Um, what do you think about my outfits?
06:44Do you like them, or...
06:46Your outfits, honestly,
06:48it was a little bit of a setback at first.
06:50It just kind of threw me off,
06:52because, you know, I come from a different generation.
06:54But then, at the same time,
06:56I felt so empowered when I heard
06:58that other people at the gym
07:00were, like, asking you where you got your stuff.
07:03So, would you say you pretty much accept our lifestyle, girl?
07:07Yes, absolutely.
07:09Yeah, I'm very...
07:11I accept and support your lifestyle.
07:14Yeah.
07:16I love the fact that we're on this, like, journey together,
07:19where we're, like, trying to end stigmas
07:21and show other people that it's okay
07:23to be outside of the box in a relationship.
07:25You've given me, you know,
07:27the confidence to do what I do,
07:29the ability to get what I do,
07:31and the support.
07:33And, I mean, it's...
07:36I think that, like,
07:38if you are feeling a need to judge somebody,
07:41it's probably because you're not feeling satisfied
07:43in your own life, your own connection.
07:45And if you have something wrong
07:47with, like, two people living authentically,
07:50I don't know.
07:52I don't know what to tell them.
08:05You
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