00:00This is Chance.
00:02She fell in love with Justin.
00:05We met in the Army as men, and now we're husband and wife.
00:08People judge my relationship because I'm trans.
00:10When we met, I did identify as straight.
00:12When he decided that he was going to tell his family...
00:15Witchcraft was involved.
00:16They thought that I had bewitched their son.
00:19This is a comment I get a lot.
00:21Yeah, we're definitely losing World War III.
00:23The Army hopping on this delusion, too terrible.
00:27I wonder what Russia thinks.
00:29I do not care what Russia thinks.
00:32We met in basic training in the Army.
00:35Before I transitioned, I was out as gay for a while.
00:37I was not into Chance because Chance was a boy.
00:41That was not in the cards.
00:44I was not initially attracted to him.
00:46I thought he had a really nice smell.
00:48Now I'm in love with that smell.
00:50Just through basic conversation and just having things in common,
00:54we definitely sparked off something.
00:57A little flirting here and there comes around.
00:59Then you build an attraction to somebody.
01:02I came out as transgender to Justin
01:05probably about three months into our relationship.
01:08He had already accepted me as being gay.
01:11He fell in love with me as a gay man.
01:14He went from being a straight guy to being in love with a gay man.
01:18Now I'm like, I'm going to throw this on you, too. Now I'm trans.
01:22I'm taking this man on a roller coaster.
01:24She called me and she asked me, what if I was a girl?
01:27I was like, okay.
01:29I've always seen Chance as a woman
01:32because she's always been super feminine.
01:34It was just like, I don't think there's going to be a lot that changes.
01:38The reason I decided to go public with my story
01:41is because I just wasn't seeing a lot of trans soldier visibility online.
01:45I think that it's something that needs to be shared.
01:48I think that it can help a lot of people.
01:50I really don't care about the judgment, other people's opinion.
01:53Other people's opinion of me, of us, has nothing to do with us.
01:57It's not that you are trans.
01:59It's that you're weak as ****.
02:02You are not a warrior.
02:04She's a D1 athlete.
02:05That's all I've got to say about that one.
02:08And this is what my **** tax dollars are paying for.
02:11So yes, you know, as a soldier, the military does cover my hormones.
02:15I just want people to remember I'm a taxpayer, too.
02:18This one I just find to be rude.
02:20And it says, please become a statistic.
02:22What I don't think people understand is that
02:24not only is suicide an issue in the trans community,
02:28it is also an issue in the military.
02:30Just please, like, I'll ask you, like,
02:32don't say that to any other trans person.
02:34Don't say that to any other soldier.
02:36When he decided that he was going to tell his family,
02:39he completely identified as straight.
02:41Really didn't have any interaction with the queer community.
02:44Was not in that discourse.
02:46So when he told me, like, yeah, I'm going to tell them.
02:49You're just going to be cool about it.
02:51Like, do not, like, I want, the first thing I told him,
02:55the first thing I told him was,
02:57if you want to come out to your family,
02:59do not come out to them and also tell them that we're in a relationship
03:02because they're going to assume that I turned you that way.
03:05I did that.
03:06He did that.
03:08And they were not the most accepting at first.
03:12Witchcraft was involved.
03:14Witchcraft, apparently, apparently.
03:17They thought that I had bewitched and enchanted their son, you know,
03:22and I guess in a way I did.
03:26All right, babe, Linda's coming over today.
03:28Help me pick out something to wear.
03:30My sister Linda's coming over.
03:31I'm interested to see what she has to say.
03:33These shorts or these pants.
03:35I kind of, like, figured out
03:37and it came to, like, acceptance that I was trans.
03:39While I was in Bay State training,
03:41it had always been something that was in the back of my mind.
03:43But, you know, I was like, no, that can't be me.
03:46I had finally got to the point where, like, I was comfortable with being, like, a gay man.
03:50And then I was like, dang, so now I have to deal with being trans,
03:54which is, like, from my experience, even harder.
03:57I didn't go in expecting to transition.
04:00It was just something that I came to the conclusion of.
04:02I think that there are certain perceptions about the military,
04:05but I would say this is one of the best places to be any type of different.
04:09Everyone's coming from a different place in their life.
04:11I wouldn't say that we're outliers in the military.
04:14Everybody's an outlier in their own way.
04:16Everyone's an outlier.
04:17That's the best part of it.
04:19So, Linda's coming over today.
04:21I'm a big sister.
04:22I'm definitely interested to see what she has to say
04:24about, like, the family dynamic and how she sees us.
04:28I met Justin through my father, who is married to his mother.
04:32I know in the past he has only dated women.
04:35We have a few family members that is very traditional
04:40and really just see, you know, men, women.
04:44They don't really understand.
04:46What I would like to ask Justin is
04:48if dating a trans woman strikes any fear?
04:52I noticed some of the things on TikTok,
04:55people are saying some rude things.
04:58They call trans a disgrace.
05:00A disgrace?
05:02Are you guys ever worried about what other people think of you?
05:07No, not really.
05:08At the end of the day, when I turn off my phone,
05:10I still have my husband.
05:11I still have my career.
05:13I still have my amazing family.
05:15I still have my friends, so...
05:16And that's all that matters.
05:18How would you say the rest of your family reacted?
05:22I can't really, like, speak on everyone,
05:24but I know that there's a few family members
05:27who are more traditional.
05:28They have their own beliefs, their own personal beliefs.
05:31Do you remember that one family member
05:33who asked me if I peed standing up or sitting down?
05:36I would rather, like, the family be, like,
05:39comfortable asking those questions
05:40and, like, we can look back and just laugh on them
05:43than them to, like, be weird about it
05:45and keep them to themselves, you know?
05:47Absolutely.
05:48I know, overall, they have adapted to, you know,
05:53the new version of Justin.
05:55We can tell that he is happy.
05:57Anything else, like, it seems like
05:59they have overcame a lot of things.
06:01I know there's a lot of negative energy out there
06:04on the subject of trans women in general,
06:07especially black trans women.
06:08I was interested in hearing your first initial opinions on
06:13when I introduced you to Chance.
06:15Well, my first initial opinion is she is beautiful.
06:20Absolutely.
06:21You know, I was more so happy for you
06:23and happy that you were comfortable in your own skin.
06:26That's all that mattered, you know?
06:28So it was kind of like coming to me with,
06:31you know, I have a new girlfriend.
06:33I have a new wife.
06:34You know, coming out as, I am gay.
06:36It's like, you're happy,
06:37and that's all that matters, regardless.
06:39Yeah, and I love being part of your family so much.
06:42I love you being a part of our family.
06:44Yeah, you're really my sister, girl.
06:46Aw, I love you.
06:47I've grown in my relationship with his family so much.
06:50I love his family. His family loves me.
06:52What I love about Chance is how solid of a person she is.
06:56She's going to be the mother to my kid.
06:58We're going to have a healthy black family.
07:01Justin has changed my life for the better
07:04in making me realize that I can be loved.
07:08One day we had a conversation, you know,
07:10because a lot of people will say that trans people are delusional,
07:14and he said, if you're delusional, I'll be delusional with you.
07:18To any male out there who is fearful of loving up a trans woman,
07:24then you should check yourself.
07:26I spent a lot of my life hating myself.
07:30That was the majority of my childhood.
07:32That was the majority of my teenage years.
07:36I have a lot more life to live, and I'm not going to do that anymore.
07:39The Army is lucky to have her. I'm lucky to have her.
07:41The world is lucky to have her.
07:43If the sun was to blow up tomorrow, we could just throw Chance up there.
07:46We'll still be good.
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