00:00Nice. Nice to be here.
00:04I, uh, coming off six days with my in-laws.
00:10And, uh, my sister-in-law's got a kid that I don't really see eye to eye with.
00:16He's five years old.
00:20So we all went out to dinner,
00:23and the kid comes from behind me and slaps me in the neck.
00:32Now, the parents are right across from me.
00:35And they're like, oh...
00:42Now, the strike was so violent.
00:48If I ever did that as a kid at a restaurant,
00:52I'd be removed from the restaurant.
00:56I would have a talking to outside,
00:59and then I would return to the table a brand new kid.
01:07That's an Italian immigrant father beating that into your head.
01:16Respect your elders.
01:18Respect authority.
01:19Don't trust nobody!
01:21Okay, make it easy.
01:24Me and my father have a very adversarial relationship growing up,
01:28but very open.
01:30Talk about money constantly.
01:33That's all we did was talk about money.
01:36To this day, he comes over to my house.
01:37He's constantly asking me what I'm paying for stuff.
01:42Like an hour into the visit,
01:44he branches off from the rest of the family.
01:52How much? How much you pay?
01:56Now I gotta give them the parent price?
02:03Now...
02:05You never give your parents the full price,
02:07they'll have a heart attack in the living room.
02:09I gotta shave 80% off so he can absorb it.
02:15And he can't even take the parent price.
02:19I go, I don't know, is that the $400?
02:21$400!
02:24I can make this!
02:29You can make a Samsung TV set?
02:38I'm constantly talking about money, my father.
02:42My wife's family, they don't talk about money.
02:44To this day, my father, he knows what I make,
02:47I know what he's got hidden.
02:51Every time this man goes on vacation, he calls me.
02:54He thinks he's gonna die on vacation.
02:57He goes, listen, just in case anything happens,
03:01on vacation,
03:03you're gonna get a treasure map in the mail in three weeks.
03:06What?
03:12My wife's family, they don't talk about nothing.
03:15I ask my wife all the time,
03:17what do your parents got?
03:18What do they got?
03:18What do they got in the...
03:22My wife grew up totally different.
03:24My wife grew up in a Jewish family, no food.
03:27Right?
03:28I grew up in an Italian family,
03:29that's all we did was eat.
03:31If my mother had 10 people coming over,
03:33she made for $10,000,
03:34just in case somebody had an appetite.
03:38I had a grandmother who lived in the basement.
03:41Just cranking out lasagna trays.
03:50It's like a lasagna factory.
03:53In the basement,
03:54food just kept coming up the stairs
03:57for no reason on a Tuesday at 3.30.
04:04My poor grandmother.
04:0685.
04:07This woman was built to cook.
04:11Over a hot stove.
04:13Didn't even use a spoon.
04:14Just...
04:15Her hand...
04:19Her hand was made out of leather.
04:21Just...
04:27And we called her Grandma.
04:30We didn't give her some stupid nickname.
04:35People today, they give their parents,
04:37grandparents the weirdest nickname.
04:39Oh, this is...
04:40This is Meemaw and Peepaw.
04:43What?
04:55The guy is 90 years old.
04:59He fought in World War II.
05:02Now his name is Peepaw.
05:04What are you doing to the guy?
05:07You guys have been fantastic.
05:09God bless Montreal.
05:10This is Meemaw.
05:13What's the name of the Mojite?
05:14I've been SUMVIO.
05:15No.
05:16You go.
05:17No.
05:17No.
05:17No.
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