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R29'ers Lucie, Hannah, and Lyric discuss the definition of the friend zone and just what it feels like to be in the friend zone vs. being the friend zoner.

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Transcript
00:00The friend zone!
00:03Okay, so what does it mean to be in the friend zone?
00:05Well, I feel like it means different things for everybody because you can either be on the side that is
00:10friend zoning
00:11or you are unfortunately and sadly in the zone.
00:15Have you heard that happen to you before?
00:17Yeah!
00:18Awww!
00:19Who?
00:19Who did that happen with?
00:21Yeah.
00:21Well, let me just call you all out.
00:24Roger, Peter, Daniel.
00:25Jake, Alex, Ryan, I'm just kidding.
00:28Were those roommates?
00:30No.
00:31Justin, Brian, Frank.
00:33Dylan.
00:34I once dated a Dylan for 45 minutes.
00:36He was really good at grinding.
00:39It was the seventh grade.
00:40Yup.
00:41Her body is a mess.
00:42Was this an of our mitzvahs?
00:43After the 45 minutes, we both friend zoned each other and it was great because then we're still kind of
00:49friends now.
00:49Like, if I see him, it's nice.
00:51It's so great.
00:51A mutual friend zone.
00:52A mutual friend zone.
00:53I'm always the one who's placing me in the friend zone.
00:57I've been in a relationship for seven years, so every guy I meet at a bar, immediately.
01:03We're friends, and if you don't want to be friends, I'm going to go back to my friends.
01:07I feel like every time you are confronted with meeting a guy and you're not single, like, you feel this
01:12pressure to immediately put in the space.
01:15Yeah.
01:15Like, you can't even laugh.
01:16You can't let the conversation go, like, ten minutes without making it known in some awkward way that you have
01:23a boyfriend.
01:23Oh, my boyfriend has that shirt.
01:25Yeah.
01:26Or sometimes they're like, oh, my boyfriend likes that drink.
01:28Right.
01:29Is that a speck of dust?
01:30My boyfriend likes that.
01:31Yeah.
01:31I'm kind of a pro at it now.
01:33I feel like I just have to develop, like, a tactic of being honest.
01:37I very much will tell someone, I'm attracted to you.
01:41Right.
01:41Or I'll be like, I'm not attracted to you.
01:43I would love to be friends.
01:44So you said to someone, I'm not physically attracted to you?
01:48Yeah, straight up.
01:49Bold mood lyric.
01:50But that's only because I grew up around a lot of guys.
01:52How did they respond?
01:54Um, you know, I think people are kind of shocked sometimes, you know, when you, like, actually come through like
01:59that.
02:00So it's kind of like they have no choice but to be cool about it.
02:03You know, because they're just like, all right, I can't really, what are you going to respond with?
02:09You know, because if you do something, you know, people are persistent.
02:13I feel like that would really hurt my feelings if I was like, hey, what's up?
02:17And I was like, I'm not attracted to you.
02:19I would be like, okay, okay.
02:22Sometimes it's definitely awkward.
02:24But one thing that I find is the idea that when they meet a girl, they want to sleep with
02:29her.
02:29Absolutely.
02:30And if she puts them in the friend zone, it's a bad thing.
02:33Yeah.
02:33And it's kind of like, where did that come from?
02:36Right.
02:36I don't know, maybe even some guys who are watching, you could comment and let us know what's going through
02:41your head.
02:42Because for me, like, that's a constant, like, replay of things that I'm thinking when I'm interacting with a new
02:48guy.
02:50And it feels like a burden on the woman always to do the friending.
02:53I also think we are all speaking here coming from a very heteronormative place.
02:58And, I mean, I would be interested to hear if anyone's part of the LGBTQ community, how is it different
03:04for you guys?
03:04You know, like, how does this friend zone situation change, if at all?
03:10Or is it all the same?
03:11You heard what we have to say about the friend zone.
03:13We want to know what you think about the friend zone.
03:16Comment below and let us know.
03:18Friend zone!
03:22The friend zone.
03:23See you there!
03:24Have a great day!
03:26See you there!
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