- 11 hours ago
Fifteen Candles
It's Breanna's 15th birthday, and she's very excited. After receiving such cool presents from her grandma and mom, Flex tries to top them all by inviting Lil' Zane to Breanna's birthday party. Everything starts to go wrong when Duane tells Breanna before Flex can actually invite him. In the end, after all that stalking, Flex is finally able to get him to perform at Breanna's birthday party.
It's Breanna's 15th birthday, and she's very excited. After receiving such cool presents from her grandma and mom, Flex tries to top them all by inviting Lil' Zane to Breanna's birthday party. Everything starts to go wrong when Duane tells Breanna before Flex can actually invite him. In the end, after all that stalking, Flex is finally able to get him to perform at Breanna's birthday party.
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TVTranscript
00:03Oh, my daughter's making a hot breakfast, and I don't see any pigs flying, so we must
00:08be out of clean bowls for cereal.
00:11No, there are 15 bowls and 15 spoons, and I'm serving you your pancakes on a 15-inch
00:18plate.
00:20Oh, that's right.
00:22Somebody's 15th birthday is coming up.
00:25Uncle Roscoe's dog.
00:27Now, remind me to send old Fatback a big old meaty bone.
00:31Daddy, on Saturday, Fatback will still be a dog, but I will be a woman.
00:37So, look, I know it's your birthday.
00:39I was there when you were born, all right?
00:40I was unconscious most of the time, but I was there.
00:44Ah, hey, hey, my people.
00:45Tell me, which one of these suits makes me look more like a male model?
00:51The one that comes with the new face and a huge bank account.
00:55Hey, what's up, Dwayne?
00:56Got a court date?
00:58Yeah, I'm suing to have you sent back to Atlanta.
01:02Now, after five long years of heartfelt correspondence, I am finally meeting the love of my life.
01:07Darling.
01:08Is that the woman you met on PrisonPal.com?
01:12I thought you said she was still serving time for assault.
01:15No, it is not her fault that the security guard that she tied up just happened to have a heart
01:19problem.
01:20The fact is that she's being paroled and she's spending her first weekend with me at my place.
01:25Oh, that's a good idea.
01:27After staying at your place, a halfway house won't seem so bad.
01:32Sometimes in this life, you can feel all by yourself
01:36But I have a partner, but I can't try no one else
01:41So don't isolate yourself when there's nobody around
01:46I'll be better thinking then
01:48What a true love we are
02:11Ooh, and this is my seventh birthday party. Mom took us horseback riding.
02:16That is so cool.
02:18Girl, not for my butt. It was sore until I turned eight.
02:21So you're lucky your mom makes you feel so special on your birthday.
02:24I was born on Cinco de Mayo.
02:26I thought I was Mexican until I was ten.
02:30Well, Bri, you haven't seen anything compared to the birthday I'm planning for you this year.
02:35Ooh, can you give me a hit?
02:36Let's just say it begins with fan and ends with tastic.
02:45Ooh, it's a birthday envelope for mom.
02:48Oh, what do you know? Next day delivery from hell.
02:52Let's see what it is.
02:58Ooh, three front row seats to go see little Zay!
03:04You guys are coming with me. Ooh, let's just go out in the streets and yell.
03:12So what did you get her?
03:13I got a black Barbie dream house.
03:18Don't beat yourself up, son.
03:20And don't do our birthdays well.
03:22Women do.
03:23We're nurturers.
03:25You all are takers.
03:27Like your father.
03:28He was off on a fishing trip with his old war buddies talking about how his cell phone doesn't get
03:33a signal on the lake.
03:34You know, I mean, that's what that is.
03:35My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my crisis?
03:38Oh, sorry, baby.
03:40I just miss your dad.
03:42But it does give me this weekend to spend with you and Brianna.
03:45Oh, I'm glad to have you here, Mom.
03:47And you can help me make Brianna's birthday special.
03:50So what do you want to do, son?
03:51I want to put that mother she holds dear to shame.
03:54Black.
03:55I wonder if there's a big Zane, a mama Zane, or a Snoop Doggy Zane.
04:00Hello?
04:01Hey, hey, Sea World.
04:02Yeah.
04:02How much would it cost for Shamu to give my daughter a birthday ride?
04:07Hello.
04:11So, Flex.
04:14What do you think?
04:15The suit is cool, but what's up with your hat?
04:18What's up with your hat?
04:19Shut up.
04:21And I appreciate if you kept the sarcasm to a minimum when Darla gets here.
04:25Why, what's she going to do, shank me?
04:28And why is she coming here anyway?
04:31Tell you the truth, I'm kind of nervous about meeting her.
04:33So, I need you with me, man.
04:36What if she rejects me?
04:37And how is this different from every woman you've ever known?
04:41Flex, I poured my heart and my soul into those letters.
04:43And she poured right back.
04:44I mean, she knows my innermost secrets, and she still wants to meet me.
04:48She could be my soulmate.
04:50You mean a sailmate.
04:52Shut up.
04:56Dwayne?
04:57Do I have the look of desperation on my face?
05:01So, you must be Dwayne.
05:11Darla?
05:14Could I be staring into the eyes of my true love?
05:18You're even better looking than your hair, right?
05:22You want to go down to the beach and take a stroll in the moonlight?
05:26Yeah.
05:28Oh, and then we can get our names tattooed on each other's butts.
05:33Oh, first and last.
05:37Okay, but we'll have to fit it on my right cheek.
05:38I don't want to crowd mama's names.
05:45Hey, you look familiar.
05:48You probably seen my picture up at the post office.
05:55Hello, Mr. Washington.
05:57I can't believe you actually called me.
05:59I guess since I'm going to be a son-in-law someday, you want to bond with me?
06:03No, I just wanted to pick your brain.
06:05Yeah, thank you.
06:08Now, look, you hang out with Brianna a lot, right?
06:10Yeah.
06:11Is there anything special I can surprise her with for her birthday?
06:14I don't know.
06:15Lil Zane's hard to top.
06:17Unless you have a private party with Lil Zane.
06:20A party with Lil Zane?
06:22That's a good idea, Arnaz.
06:24I mean, why don't I just hop on my magic carpet and go hand an invitation to him personally?
06:29Uh, I can get you Lil Zane.
06:31Ah, um, I'll ask my mama.
06:35What is your mama going to do?
06:36Um, she's a backup singer for Mary J. Blige and Luther Vandross and some bigger names.
06:43Too many to remember.
06:44And she can hook me up?
06:45Oh, yeah.
06:46She got Shaka Khan to sing my 13th birthday party.
06:48Really?
06:49Yeah, Auntie Shaka was real cool.
06:51She sang I Feel For You and gave me a nice birthday spade.
06:54Yeah, that was the day I became a man.
07:00Wow.
07:00So, your moms can definitely hook this up with Lil Zane?
07:04No doubt.
07:05But if I do this, I'm going to need a favor from you.
07:07I am not pimping my daughter.
07:08I would never be stupid enough to ask you to, sir.
07:11But when that magical day does come, and I ask for your daughter's hand in marriage,
07:15just ask that you give us your blessing.
07:18Arnaz, if that day ever comes, I'll give you my blessing.
07:21And then the locusts will devour the earth.
07:31Flex wear these?
07:34I can't believe my baby's all grown up and wearing man panties.
07:40Okay, Grandma, what do you think about these for the Lil Zane concert?
07:44Colorful, tasteful, not too sexy.
07:47Oh, dang, I gotta go change.
07:49No.
07:50No, no, that's the good thing.
07:52You think the girls who show their bosom are going to get more attention than you at the concert?
07:56A year.
07:59We're also going to get a baby at 16.
08:01And if you make me a great-grandmother at the tender age of 41, I'm going to have to hurt
08:06you.
08:0741?
08:08Hush, child.
08:10We just want to look good for Lil Zane.
08:12We got front row C.
08:14And he might pick us out of the crowd to come up and dance.
08:16And from there, the road to video girl is already paved.
08:22You keep aiming high, baby.
08:25And as soon as we get that pimple off of Bree's face, everything will be perfect.
08:32Oh, no, don't look at me.
08:34I'm a she-beast.
08:38And then after the sting of the tattoo wore off, let's show them.
08:41We had these made.
08:46That's so, uh, junior high-ish.
08:49Your doll's been in and out of the joints since she was 13.
08:52I went through puberty in Salatine.
08:54By the way.
08:55Where can I cut loose?
08:58Uh, third door on the left.
09:00I miss you.
09:02Prison talk.
09:04Ain't she tender?
09:06Enough of your jailhouse love.
09:07I got to get this party together for Brianna.
09:10Lil Zane's coming.
09:11Oh, you got Lil Zane?
09:12I'm working on it.
09:13I'm working on it.
09:14I got a contact that assures me they can get Lil Zane.
09:17Besides, when have you ever known me not to get what I want?
09:19Oh, that's what I'm saying.
09:21It's my birthday's in March and I want Prince.
09:23All right, the purple one himself.
09:24Okay.
09:25Why not put this blemish cream on my face?
09:27Is it working?
09:28Because it don't feel like it's doing nothing but burning.
09:30Girl, it is not that bad.
09:32But I sure am glad I don't have one.
09:35Girl, now, pimples are good for you.
09:36They give your face a lot of character.
09:38You're going to have a lot of character.
09:42Daddy, what do you think?
09:43Sweetie, you're 15.
09:44It's normal for you to have this.
09:46Ooh, that one is pulsing up and down like Busta Rhymes.
09:50I'm never listening to Grandma again.
09:53I hope y'all know she's not 41.
09:58Uh, Dwayne, where's your girlfriend?
10:00She better not be cutting loose in my sink.
10:04I'll go get her, dog.
10:07Oh, hey, Mr. Washington.
10:08I was looking for Brianna.
10:10Nope.
10:10Oh, nice.
10:11My man, my dog.
10:13Hey, what's running off to, man?
10:15Come on in here.
10:16Sit down.
10:16Get comfortable, man.
10:17Lift your feet up.
10:20So, uh, can I get you something to drink?
10:21Uh, I'll take a Fresca.
10:23Smart man.
10:24Nothing beats the smooth citrus taste of a Fresca.
10:27So, uh, speaking of Lil Zane, uh, your mama gonna hook me up?
10:32Uh, funny thing.
10:34Lil Zane said no.
10:37What do you mean he said no?
10:39Actually, he didn't say no as much as, uh, my mom never talked to him.
10:44Boy, she couldn't reach him?
10:45No.
10:46She doesn't know him.
10:49What are you talking about?
10:51Flex, the other day you were so desperate.
10:53I just wanted to help you help Brianna and in turn help myself.
10:56What can I say, man?
10:57I'm a fool for love.
10:58I can't believe you lied to me.
10:59Get out of my house.
11:00Get out.
11:01You know, technically, this is your fault.
11:03If I have such a fine daughter, you better get out of here before I tell him that.
11:07Oh.
11:08Hey, Daddy, look.
11:09Better?
11:10Ooh.
11:11Uh, you know, I can get a magic marker and draw three more zits on the other side and it'll
11:15look like you got freckles.
11:16Hey, I hope you don't mind.
11:17I borrowed some of your fancy soaps.
11:19Soaps like these will cost me my shoes and my self-respect in a job.
11:27Brianna, you must be so excited.
11:29Now, darling, I can't wait to come to the party and meet Lil Zane.
11:32Lil Zane?
11:33Lil Zane gonna be up in here?
11:35Yeah, Lil Zane's gonna be here at your party.
11:37It is all thanks to your dad.
11:39Oh, really?
11:40Yeah, Lil Zane gonna be here all up in our house.
11:42Uh, actually, baby.
11:43Ooh, thank you, Daddy.
11:44This is gonna be the best birthday I've ever had.
11:46Come on, girl.
11:47Let's go play and play.
11:49Thanks a lot, D.
11:50I just found out I can't get Lil Zane.
11:53Now Brianna's really gonna be disappointed.
11:55Oh, yeah, she sure will.
11:56But does that mean you can't get Prince for me?
11:58Yeah, I'll be just kidding.
12:08Ooh, okay.
12:09Two minutes to Lil Zane.
12:10Zitch it.
12:11Nope.
12:11Clear as a bell.
12:12Your grandma's blemish cream really worked.
12:15Arnaz, maybe her grandma knows of a deodorant that actually works for you.
12:22Oh, good idea.
12:23Maybe she can recommend something for those sideburns of yours, Elvis.
12:28This baby hair.
12:30Like a little baby wolf.
12:36Man, I haven't been backstage since I was a groupie for Grace Jones.
12:39Grace Jones?
12:41Flex is something about bald-headed women.
12:43It's a whole different bald man.
12:45Okay, look.
12:45Lil Zane's people have not returned my phone calls.
12:47We're gonna have to do this the old-fashioned way.
12:49Crash the party.
12:51Oh, that's the little man himself.
12:52Yo, Lil Zane.
12:53Hey, can I holler at you for a minute?
12:54I just went, ah, ow, ow, ow, ow.
12:56What's up, man?
12:57Hey, yo, man.
12:58I'm a little busy right now, all right?
13:01That's not love.
13:03What am I supposed to do now, huh?
13:05Brianna's counting on me.
13:06Dancers on stage now.
13:08City of Baltimore, get out your seats.
13:12Let's give a big round of applause for Lil Zane!
13:20Yeah, okay, y'all.
13:21Welcome to Lil Zane's world.
13:24How y'all feeling tonight?
13:25Okay, uh, we gonna do it like this.
13:28All the true fans out here, I want y'all to put y'all hands in the air like this.
13:32And if y'all know the words, I want y'all to scream it long, worldwide.
13:35Check it.
13:36I never like it before she never beat.
13:38I made it bigger, way bigger than I'm about to get you.
13:40Let us see.
13:40I'm getting paid like I'm close to.
13:42The homies talk to y'all, I'm over one and hang me still close to.
13:45I put position with the post cap.
13:47I write raps, make millions like that.
13:49I like that.
13:50I never was a rich man.
13:50What is your dad doing up there?
13:52Girl, what do you think?
13:54He's obviously got no dad to come to my party, and Zane invited him to dance with him.
13:59Girl, what they obviously, homies?
14:00I'm getting here to dance, they can move on them.
14:03Hey, Hennessy with the Shanae's.
14:05You trying to do your thing tonight?
14:06We throw chips like it's bingo night.
14:08Anything you like.
14:09What night with me?
14:10It's about to change it, but the whole club's locked off.
14:12Yo, man, I don't pay you to talk, I pay you to dance.
14:14I'm dancing, I'm dancing.
14:16Speaking of dancing, my daughter's having a birthday party, and there's going to be lots
14:19of it.
14:20So you think you're going to blow through?
14:23You're that birthday stalker, aren't you?
14:25Yo, security, somebody get this fool off stage trying to steal my son.
14:29Hey, hey, man.
14:30I'm Fletch Washington.
14:31Lay out.
14:32Get in, too.
14:33It's a new car, Tom, man.
14:36Oh, oh, my elbow, dog.
14:38Hey, yo, man.
14:39We're sorry about that, man.
14:40Some loser stalker trying to get me to go to his daughter's birthday party.
14:44Yo, check this out.
14:45We're going to do it like this.
14:46That don't stop nothing.
14:47DJ, run it back one time.
14:48Come on, y'all.
14:49Um.
14:54Hi, sweetie.
14:55How was the concert?
14:57I couldn't see it.
14:58My eyes were burning with the tears of humiliation.
15:02This has something to do with your father, doesn't it?
15:05My eyes burned like that for 18 years.
15:08Grandma, Dad got on stage with little Zane, and Zane didn't even know who he was.
15:13So they dragged him off, and the worst thing was his dad says for like two years old.
15:21Baby, just let me explain.
15:22I was just trying to get little Zane to come to your birthday party.
15:25Then why did you tell me he was coming if he wasn't coming in the first place?
15:30Well, that's a long story.
15:33Look, I was just trying to do something wonderful for you, like your mother did in all those pictures I
15:37saw.
15:38That I'm not in.
15:44Daddy, Mom does good birthdays.
15:47You do good other stuff.
15:50You good at making me laugh when I'm down?
15:53You don't crowd me like Mom does?
15:54You give me my space?
15:56Ooh, and if anybody can whip up a dinner out of old Halloween candy, it's you.
16:02So you're okay about not having little Zane at your party?
16:06Come on, Daddy.
16:07I mean, having little Zane at my birthday party would have been off the hook.
16:12But thanks for trying.
16:14You did the best you could.
16:19You all right.
16:24Hug.
16:34Oh, Daddy, this party is off the Hingsy.
16:37Well, if I was in church, I would say, holla-ling-sy.
16:41Well, then I guess you don't need this to push it over the top.
16:45Bling-o.
16:45Oh, Tiffany, I don't care what it is because I know it's expensive.
16:51Oh, Daddy, this bracelet is beautiful.
16:53Oh, thank you, baby.
16:56Uh, your mama didn't buy you one like that, didn't she?
16:58No.
16:58Oh, good, good.
17:00Smile.
17:01Here's one for the photo album.
17:04All right, baby, look, go on, enjoy the party, go with your friends, have fun.
17:08Bye.
17:08All right.
17:09Mm, mm, mm.
17:11But you never dance like this in prison, huh?
17:14Actually, if you want to get an extra pudding cup, sometimes you have to.
17:21You want to dance with that, girl?
17:23Sure.
17:29Bree, I have something for you.
17:32Now, before you open it, something I want to say.
17:35I'm just going to put it out there.
17:37No jokes, no clean lines.
17:40What's on your mind?
17:42Actually, it's not so much what's on my mind.
17:44No.
17:44It's what's in.
17:48Wow.
17:51I can't believe it.
17:52It's no damn hard to believe it.
17:55Little girl, you better calm down.
17:58Are you the birthday girl?
17:59Yes, yes, I am.
18:01An imposter, I'm the birthday girl.
18:03Oh, my gosh, I can't believe it.
18:05Well, your father's been harassing my people, stepping all over my dances.
18:10I figured any father that would stress me like this must really love his daughter.
18:15What's up, man?
18:16Thanks for showing up, Lil' Zane.
18:18Hey, man, anything you ever need in sports world, I got access to everything.
18:22Oh, yeah?
18:23Yeah.
18:23Can you give me Super Bowl tickets?
18:25I work on it.
18:27Thank you, Daddy.
18:28It's the best birthday I ever had.
18:30Oh, that was nothing, baby.
18:31But tell your mama, Lil' Zane's going to be hard to top.
18:34Heard that.
18:35Yeah.
18:37I'm saying, if it's cool, I was going to do a little something, something for the birthday
18:40girl.
18:41Oh, that's me, Andy.
18:42Let's start the music up.
18:45It takes two to make your thing go right.
18:47If I'm correct, then you're single, right?
18:49But you're trying to do your thing tonight.
18:50I throw chips like it's bingo night.
18:52Anything you like.
18:53One night with me is bound to change your life.
18:55Got the whole club locked off.
18:57Chris style popped off.
18:58Baby, hold.
18:59This is the scenery when I ball.
19:00Look, mommy, a tent.
19:02Dancing so close, looking like Simee's twins.
19:04Shorty, stay focused.
19:05Just keep your mind on me.
19:06Like your rent, baby.
19:07You're behind on me.
19:39Sir, we have reason to believe you're harboring a fugitive.
19:42What?
19:43Son, just go quietly.
19:45You brought enough shame to this family.
19:48There she is.
19:50All right, Darla.
19:52Let's go.
19:54Oh, hey, hey, man.
19:55I'm in her, man.
19:57This is police brutality.
19:58I want your badge number.
19:59You'll be writing parking tickets for the rest of your life.
20:01Out of the car.
20:02Out of the car.
20:04Out of the car.
20:06I have a confession to make.
20:09I didn't actually get paroled.
20:11I busted out.
20:13I just had to see you.
20:16You broke out of the big house just to be with me?
20:19And I'll do it again.
20:20All right, let's go.
20:26Would you wait for me?
20:28For 20 years?
20:30Oh, boom.
20:3220 years is a long time.
20:34I mean, I'm still young and virile.
20:36I mean, Baltimore is filled with temptresses.
20:39He'll be here.
20:40Let's go.
21:09I love you, Daddy.
21:10Love you, too, Netta.
21:11I love you, too, Netta.
21:12I love you, too, Netta.
21:13I love you, too, Netta.
21:13I love you, too, Netta.
21:13I love you, too, Netta.
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