- 2 days ago
Playing Possum
Breanna's crush on a handsome football player inspires her to do the unthinkable. Meanwhile, Duane pulls a fast one on Flex, who finds himself in a surprising new sideline.
Breanna's crush on a handsome football player inspires her to do the unthinkable. Meanwhile, Duane pulls a fast one on Flex, who finds himself in a surprising new sideline.
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TVTranscript
00:02Bye, Daddy. See you later. Have fun at work. See you later.
00:04Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. That's what you wear in the school?
00:08Yeah, after you freaked out about my outfit yesterday,
00:11I figured I'd dress more appropriately. You're a good daddy.
00:15I don't know what to do.
00:16Wait, no.
00:17I have to.
00:22Trying to put one up on the master.
00:24Yeah, I thought we agreed. Less a little cam, more everything else.
00:28But, Daddy, everybody's wearing this.
00:30Well, everybody doesn't have a daddy who's willing to catch a case over his daughter.
00:35Not to mention, your knees look like you've been praying in flower.
00:41Uh, check it out. Check it out.
00:48What do you think?
00:49I didn't think you can get any shorter.
00:54What is it?
00:55My latest advertising tool.
00:57See, the Ferrari brings in the men, and yours truly brings in the ladies.
01:04If you're speaking for the ladies who aren't blind, it's not working.
01:09Well, why don't you speak for little girls and be quiet.
01:14Now, you're not selling Ferraris down at that lot.
01:16The fastest thing on that lot is Big Sal's secretary, Easy Linda.
01:21True, true, but you see, people have to come down to the lot in order to find that out.
01:27Don't you ever feel sleazy cheating people?
01:30Man, I'm a used car salesman, all right?
01:32I eat sleazy for breakfast and wash it down with a big tall glass of dishonesty.
01:37Oh, yeah.
01:37Sometimes in this life, you can feel all by yourself.
01:41Check, one, two.
01:42But I have a partner when I can't try to know what he needs.
01:47So don't isolate yourself when there's nobody around.
01:51Oh, yeah.
01:51I'll be better thinking then, what a true love we are.
01:56Baby, you don't get some more.
01:58Baby, one, one, one, one, one, one.
02:01Can't nobody break the spine.
02:03Baby, one-on-one.
02:05One-on-one was just before.
02:06Now we're having fun.
02:08Baby, one-on-one, yeah.
02:11One-on-one.
02:15Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go.
02:24Oh, now, that looks tasty.
02:27Who is that?
02:28That's my cousin, Rio.
02:30Trust me, there's nothing there.
02:31It's just all good looks and athletic ability.
02:34I think he's on the Dean's list, too.
02:37He's also quarterback of the football team.
02:39They call themselves the dog pound.
02:42Well, you can call me the dog catcher.
02:45Woof, woof.
02:47I know what you're thinking.
02:48But I can say this because he's family.
02:50He used to keep a booger collection.
02:53What's up, cuz?
02:54What's up, geek?
02:55Whoa, who are your friends?
02:57Well, you already know Spirit, and this is Brianna.
03:00Brianna?
03:01Nice name.
03:03It means virtuous.
03:05But don't let the name for you.
03:09Rio?
03:10Oh.
03:12I've been looking all over for you.
03:14It's fourth period, that's our time, and you know how I feel about our time.
03:19I know.
03:19I'm sorry, baby.
03:20Let me make it up to you.
03:21Okay.
03:23Who's that?
03:24Tiffany Dyson.
03:25Rio's girlfriend.
03:27He's that desperate that he's dating a cheerleader?
03:29That's like dating a life-sized Barbie doll, except the doll's hair is real.
03:34Um, Spirit, Arnaz, why is your little friend staring at me?
03:38Tiffany, meet Brianna.
03:41That means virtuous.
03:44Well, I'm Tiffany, and that means I don't care.
03:48Oh, so you're a cheerleader.
03:50Head.
03:51Cheerleader.
03:52Let me guess.
03:53You're a wannabe?
03:54Oh, no.
03:55I'm a gonna be, because you just convinced me to try out for the team.
03:58Oh, how cute.
04:00The little freshie wants to be a cheerleader.
04:04Tiffany, once you see my moves, I think you're gonna want me on your team.
04:08Cheerleader rule number one, don't think, just cheer.
04:13Trials are at three o'clock tomorrow.
04:15Bring it.
04:16Oh, honey, it's already brought.
04:27So, uh, Dee, are those cardboard cutouts bringing into business?
04:30Uh, three were defaced, seven were stolen, and one.
04:33Let's just say there are Satan worshippers in your neighborhood.
04:37But that's all right, because I've come up with a whole new campaign.
04:40Friend.
04:41Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
04:42Last time I heard that from you, I lost $2,000 and was engaged to a midget wrestler in Mexico.
04:50All right, come on, man, look, look.
04:51This has nothing to do with that, all right?
04:52I just told Big Sal that Baltimore's hottest sportscaster, the Flat Dap Man, was gonna be our spokesman.
04:58He was so excited, he offered me a woman from the old country.
05:01You volunteered me to be the pitchman for Big Sal's used cars?
05:05The old country, Flex.
05:07She makes wine with her toes.
05:10Look, man, I don't care if she cracks walnuts with her butt cheeks.
05:13I'm not doing it.
05:14Come on, man.
05:15All I gotta do is get Apollonia to get you some pasta and some gabagoo.
05:19I don't even know what that is.
05:20I just like saying it.
05:22Gabagoo.
05:23Stay with me.
05:25Gabagoo.
05:26I'm not saying it, I'm not doing it, and I'm not gabagooing it.
05:31Hey, how's my high schooler?
05:34Go on, tell him how your soul doctor became a Buffy, a Heather.
05:37Like, oh, my God, these new cheers are so rad.
05:42It's no big deal, I just signed up to try for the cheerleading squad.
05:46But you hate cheerleaders.
05:48Yeah, she's doing this cozy up to Rio.
05:50He's trouble, Flex.
05:51He has a mustache.
05:53I know I've always thought of cheerleaders as a bunch of mindless hoochies in high-rise skirts, but I couldn't
05:58help myself.
05:59That Tiffany pulled me in.
06:00Now I've got to get her.
06:01I thought this was about Rio.
06:03Who's this Tiffany girl?
06:04Obviously, one of the hoochies.
06:06Flex, if you're going to be a good father, please keep up with the children.
06:11Tiffany is Rio's girlfriend, the newest speed bump in Brianna's love life.
06:15Hey, man.
06:16So you're doing this to steal some cheerleader's boyfriend?
06:19Didn't I teach you better than that?
06:21I'm not doing it because of that.
06:22I'm doing it out of spite.
06:24That's daddy's girl.
06:25Yeah.
06:29Hey, Flex.
06:30Brianna.
06:31Anybody home?
06:34Good.
06:35Uh-huh.
06:38Too good to be in my commercial, huh?
06:40Well, we'll see about that, Mr. Flatdown.
06:44A little hidden camera.
06:51Flex Washington for Big Sal's used cars.
06:54Three cameras.
06:54Take one.
07:00What's up, Gwen?
07:02What's up, Flex?
07:03What's up, man?
07:04You know, we never get a chance to talk like we used to.
07:06Sit down.
07:07What you doing, man?
07:08I'm just making sure that my buddy's comfortable.
07:11Flex, you remember your first car, don't you?
07:15Of course I do.
07:16A 78 Midnight Blue Pacer with chrome wheels.
07:19I nicknamed the Thriller.
07:21After the Michael Jackson album?
07:22No, after an ex-girlfriend named Thriller Thomas.
07:26Hey, look, Spirit.
07:27There are two spots to open on the cheerleading squad we could try all together.
07:30I'm a trained dancer.
07:31Why should I throw away ten years of ballet and jazz tap to be a cheerleader?
07:34How is that going to get me to Broadway?
07:36I don't know, but it'll get you out of fifth period of science.
07:39Well, go team, go.
07:41Okay, great.
07:42All right, Daddy.
07:43Check this out, all right?
07:44We're going to do victory.
07:45Arnaz, be ready to catch me.
07:47Girl, I'd catch you like a cold.
07:49Come on.
07:51Okay.
07:52Ready?
07:53Okay.
07:55Victory, victory.
07:57Here I try.
07:58Say it, know it, watch us fly.
08:04You have to wait.
08:05Baby, you okay?
08:08I'm cool.
08:09That was in the routine.
08:11All right, okay.
08:12See, that was cool, but, you know, your cheer was lacking some attitude.
08:16You know, and some hips.
08:18You know?
08:18You got to cheer like you're mad.
08:21Daddy, what do you know about your lady?
08:23I know a lot of things about her.
08:25Let me show you a little something.
08:27You know what I'm saying?
08:27A little flashback right here.
08:28You know?
08:31F-L-E-X.
08:33Who's the best from east to west?
08:35Flex.
08:36Flex.
08:38Who's the man with all or no how?
08:40That would be me, because I'd make the lady say, ah.
08:44Flex.
08:45Flex.
08:47F-L-E-X.
08:53Flex.
08:54Daddy.
08:56No offense, and thanks for the help, but it needs a little work.
09:02Well, you know what doesn't need any work?
09:05Quality used car.
09:07Say it in a second.
09:10Flex.
09:15Go, possums.
09:17Go.
09:18Go.
09:20Go.
09:21You go.
09:24Tiffany.
09:26You didn't even give her a chance.
09:28Well, neither did life.
09:29Oh.
09:32Oh, I've got to go to the office.
09:33Tiffany, carry on.
09:34Next.
09:39So, Brianna, what are you going to show us today, besides your padded bra?
09:46Girl, I told you this wasn't going to work.
09:49See, um, what had happened was, we, we going to do our own cheers.
09:55They made up their own cheers.
09:58How cute.
10:00I'm waiting.
10:02Ready?
10:03Okay.
10:04Hey, go possums.
10:06Hey, hey, go possums.
10:07Hit em high.
10:08Hit em low.
10:09Hit em mama.
10:10Uh-oh.
10:12My back age.
10:13My pants do tight.
10:14My booty shake.
10:15From left to right.
10:16Left.
10:17Right.
10:17Left.
10:18Right.
10:19Who rocks the house?
10:20Puffs rock the house.
10:21And when we rock the house, we knock em way down.
10:33Very nice.
10:35Next.
10:36Next?
10:37Come on, our cheer was all that.
10:39What it was was all wrong.
10:40Well, for our squad.
10:42What do you mean?
10:44Well, Brie Brie.
10:45Here at McKinley, it's more than just cheering for football and basketball.
10:50We like to compete on more of a national level, and your cheers are a little more on the neighborhood
10:55level.
10:58So, what are you saying?
11:00How can I put this in a way you'll understand?
11:03Oh, heck, I'll just say it.
11:04Your cheers are way too ghetto.
11:07Well...
11:08Hold up.
11:09Who'd she be calling ghetto?
11:18Take 17.
11:21Flex.
11:23Flex.
11:25Pretty soon, you'll be buying a quality used car for Brianna.
11:27As a parent, and as a consumer, what will you be looking for?
11:31Value, safety, or reliability?
11:37Right now, I'm looking for a big spacious trunk that I can throw you in.
11:44What are you doing?
11:49Brianna, Brianna, she's our girl.
11:51She's the best cheerleader in the world.
11:56I didn't make the squad.
11:58Oh.
11:59Brianna, Brianna didn't make the team.
12:01Guess it's not easy, as it seems.
12:05Blaine, please.
12:07Bri, what happened?
12:08Tiffany said my cheers are too ghetto.
12:11Who'd she be calling ghetto?
12:14Didn't you say her mother plays the lotto with food stamps?
12:19You know what?
12:20She probably just jealous because her boyfriend be checking me out, like I could turn all this off.
12:24Hey.
12:26Been there.
12:27Sometimes I have to ugly myself up just to be accepted.
12:32Dad, I thought high school was gonna be fun.
12:34It's only been a few weeks and I already have an enemy.
12:37Sweetie, along the road of life, you're gonna run into potholes like Tiffany.
12:40You just gotta buckle up and drive right over them.
12:44You know, Dad, maybe I should just quit this whole cheerleading thing.
12:49You know, sweetie, when I first became a sportscaster, it wasn't easy.
12:52And I was missing cues, messing up people's names.
12:57Well, did you ever think about giving up?
12:59Yeah, but then I remembered how much your child support payments were.
13:03I had to get back in the game. Your mama was tripping.
13:08Dad, what's your point?
13:10That I never knew what I could do until I tried.
13:14Bri, you can't quit.
13:16Nobody likes a quitter.
13:19Okay, girls, let's rehearse. Solid as a rock.
13:25Five, six, seven, eight.
13:27We're solid, we're solid, we're solid as a rock.
13:31Our team's so solid, so solid we can't stop.
13:34I say hey.
13:37Hey.
13:38What do you say?
13:40What do you say?
13:42I say we're solid, we're solid, we're solid as a rock.
13:46Woo!
13:48Woo!
13:50Woo!
13:51Woo!
13:52Woo!
13:52Yeah!
13:52That was all pretty easy, baby!
13:55Oh, thank you, baby. Just a little something-something I thought of.
13:58I know, I know.
13:58But isn't that a violation of cheerleading rule number one?
14:02Don't think, just cheer.
14:03I learned that from you.
14:05This is a closed session. What do you guys want?
14:08A second chance. I really think we have something to offer.
14:11Wow, you've already learned cheerleading rule number two, never give up.
14:17How many rules are there?
14:19They weren't good, Tiff. Come on, maybe you can give them a second chance.
14:23Brianna, you and your friend are spunky.
14:25Thanks! We try to have a positive attitude.
14:29No, no. You can be spunky. The possum.
14:34Our mascot.
14:36One of you can be the head and the other can be the ass.
14:42Wait a minute.
14:45Brianna, there is no way I'm gonna be the possum boogie.
14:49Woo!
14:51Man, that was some game.
14:54Dwayne, you watched the game from the sideline.
14:57Yeah, well, running back and forth getting you water wore me out.
15:04That's why Sal is my pal.
15:08Did you just say Sal's my pal?
15:11Yes, I did, and that's all I needed.
15:17So, sweetie, did my little pothole pep talk turn things around for you?
15:22Oh, it sure did turn things around. Now we're Spunky the Funky Possum.
15:26Yeah, and when the cheerleaders are doing their thing, we wobble out and stumble around while they point and laugh
15:31at us. And then, for the climax, we die.
15:37You know, it's been my experience that the mascot often steals the show.
15:42You got the Baltimore Oriole, the San Diego Chicken, the Rhode Island Roach.
15:49I mean, he's nasty, but he's a great entertainer.
15:55How are we supposed to entertain if we're dead?
15:59Possums never stay dead, baby.
16:01Gotta fight!
16:06Give me a G! G!
16:08Give me an O! O!
16:09Go, possums! Go, possums! Go, go! Go, possums! Now die!
16:31Now get ready for the real show.
16:33Go, possums!
16:43Five, six, seven, eight. Brianna!
16:45Spirit, you really got to feel it.
16:47Wait, hold up, hold up. Y'all better hold up.
16:51Cause you front end, and you ain't got nothing.
16:54And let's show them a little something.
16:56Cause the rhymes are bumping.
16:58Bring it!
16:59Oh!
17:01That's right.
17:02That's right, that's right.
17:04Five, six, seven, eight.
17:12Five, six, seven, eight.
17:13Five, six, seven, eight.
17:18Ah, ah, ah.
17:21Ah, ah.
17:24Ah, ah.
17:26Ah, ah, ah.
17:28Ah, ah, ah, ah.
17:29Oh!
17:33My baby girl!
17:36Five, six, seven, eight.
17:38Ah, ah.
17:41Ooh, ooh.
17:42Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
17:44Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
17:50I'm glad we got something for y'all.
17:52Arnettes, come on, let's roll.
17:55Yeah, we're going.
17:58Five, six, seven, eight.
18:00Ah.
18:01Ah.
18:02Ah.
18:03Ah.
18:06Ah.
18:08Ah.
18:09Ah.
18:10Ah.
18:11Ah.
18:13Ah.
18:14Ah.
18:16Ah.
18:17Ah.
18:18Ah.
18:18Ah.
18:20Ah.
18:25Tiffany, I think we just filled the last two spots on the team.
18:30Ah.
18:32Look, Mr. Brie Brie, just because y'all lucked out and got on this squad don't mean nothing,
18:36because I'm still running things up in him.
18:38Ah.
18:39Oh.
18:39It sounds like Tiffany is taking the trip to Ghetto Land.
18:47bye y'all see you practice tomorrow yo y'all were banging yeah my girl sure was
18:56arnaz brianna only likes you as a friend no she loves me didn't you see the way she was looking
19:00at me you mean like that oh please she's just using him to make me jealous
19:10poor rio being used like that i was rooting for you well i'm glad you like the show but i'm
19:18sure
19:18your girl didn't like you like me rio i'm coming babe i'm just showing your new cheerleader here
19:26you know that's all anyway i'm looking forward to seeing a lot more of you miss virtuous hey what's
19:35up there plenty i'm brianna's father mr washington and you must be brother need to comb his hair
19:43daddy you can't keep running off boys yeah well that boy can't keep running from a comb
19:49are you ever gonna like a guy a date sure i am when you find one whose parents are named
19:54mary and joseph
20:00oh oh oh you see that head i never knew the human body could bend that way that's what happens
20:06in the cheerleader gets in the way of the play it's your chair in the stand uh yo flex man
20:11give me the
20:12controller big sals use car lock where baltimore's elite come to shop isn't that right flex washington
20:22celebrity sportscaster for wy nx sounds my path and what did you drive on the sals lot mr washington
20:31a 78 big dive blue pacer with chrome wheels so if you're looking for a lady you can love
20:36on four wheels come on down to big sals use car lock and drive away a dream right flex
20:44flat app wait i'm gonna kill you man yeah but we both know you won't see that's the magic of
20:51our
20:51friendship
21:18i love you daddy love you too netto
21:20you
21:21you
21:22you
21:22You
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