00:00Is this the massage place?
00:02Yeah, it's Zen's own massage.
00:04I had a rough game of football the other day
00:07with me and my mate Ben from year three.
00:10Can you do a massage on my legs
00:12to make my legs work proper again?
00:14Um, how old are you?
00:16I'm 306,
00:18but I'm one of the best football players in my school.
00:21We can do something like that.
00:23We have a kid's sports massage.
00:26You'll have to come in with your mum or your dad
00:28because we need to have an adult.
00:31Well, I don't know my dad.
00:32He left when I was...
00:33Well, he left three, nearly six years ago.
00:36Went to get milk.
00:37And I think he's still milking the cow.
00:39My mum, she might come in,
00:42but with my Uncle Barry.
00:44Because they're always having massages and that.
00:48We don't do couples massage.
00:50We have a chiropractor on site.
00:53A what?
00:53What did you just call me?
00:55You're a chiropractor.
00:57Don't talk to me like that.
01:00No, no.
01:00It's like a doctor who, like, pops your bones.
01:03I don't want any doctor popping my b***h.
01:07Absolutely no chance.
01:09So, the massages that you do,
01:11and that...
01:12Yeah, on your legs and that,
01:14where else do you do the massages?
01:17Feet and hands and calves and shoulders.
01:20Cows?
01:21So, you do a massage on a cow?
01:23Right, can I book my mum in?
01:27Oh, my God.
01:28That is so mean.
01:30Do you do a facial?
01:32Yeah, we do.
01:33Because my Uncle Barry said to my mum all the time,
01:36I'm going to give you a facial.
01:38And my mum's like,
01:39I've never seen it.
01:40I've never seen it.
01:42I don't think that's what he meant.
01:45What else would he mean?
01:46Um, yeah, yeah, he probably...
01:49He was...
01:49You're right, he probably was, like,
01:51doing a full massage of the face.
01:52It will be £500.
01:56£500?
01:58Shut your mouth!
02:01Well, for three massages,
02:02it's going to be the total of three hours for everything.
02:05You get served a little tea,
02:08some little snack as well.
02:09I could go to my kitchen
02:11and I could get a cup of tea
02:13and a little snack
02:14and it's not cost me £500.
02:17Come on!
02:17I'm looking for a happy ending here.
02:19OK?
02:20Sorry?
02:21I'm looking for a happy ending here.
02:23Can you do me 50% off?
02:26My legs are killing from football.
02:30I scored a hat-trick.
02:32Oh, you did?
02:33Oh.
02:34I know, that's why I need a massage now, so...
02:36I'm sorry, is this a prank?
02:38No, what's your favourite song?
02:43My favourite song?
02:45Yeah, what's your favourite colour?
02:49Blue?
02:50That's wrong.
02:53What should be your song?
02:54It should be red.
02:55See you in a bit!
02:57Thank you, bye!
02:58Love you!
02:59Bye!
03:00Love you!
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