00:00Give me two minutes and I'll show you what actually creates trauma and how to begin to heal it.
00:05When you were a little boy or little girl, you were completely innocent and pure.
00:10You were also perfectly dependent and helpless.
00:13You knew deep down inside you that if no one feeds me, hugs me, or protects me, I die.
00:19So your entire system organized itself around one single thing, survival.
00:24And then it happened.
00:25Big emotions flooded your tiny body.
00:28You cried, you screamed, you raged.
00:30But instead of comfort, you got a cold stare, an overwhelmed parent, or worse, punishment.
00:36In that moment, your body learned, this part of me is dangerous.
00:39If I show it, I lose love.
00:41So you buried it.
00:42You decided very quickly that being vulnerable and authentic was too costly.
00:47Trading authenticity for the illusion of love.
00:50Fast forward 20, 30, 40 years later, you're still wearing the very masks that you built back then.
00:56And wearing them every single day is absolutely exhausting.
01:00You forget who you really are.
01:02Your body screams for relief.
01:03And that's when addictions start to slide in.
01:06Overworking, overthinking, controlling, clinging to people.
01:10These traits aren't bad habits.
01:12They are survival mechanisms attempting to soothe a pain that can no longer be soothed from the outside.
01:18But the body won't let you hide forever.
01:20It'll create anxiety, burnout, depression, even chronic illnesses just to get your attention.
01:26And it will set up your relationships to mirror your wounds back to you.
01:30The boy who was shamed for his anger, he grows up to be the nice guy.
01:34Terrified of conflict, who marries a woman that criticizes and mothers him.
01:38The little girl with the emotionally absent dad, she becomes a boss babe.
01:42Attracting emotionally unavailable men who also leave her as well.
01:46This is the power of trauma.
01:48It's the way you abandoned your own emotions just to keep a crumb of love close.
01:53Healing is the reconnection and expression of these authentic feelings.
01:58Including the grief, the rage, the terror, and the shame that you buried.
02:02It's also reparenting the little boy or girl inside you that never got held.
02:08Healing is also learning to stand in your authenticity even if it risks losing love.
02:14Because healing isn't about managing life better.
02:16Healing is about dropping the mask and reclaiming the parts that you had to shut down so long ago.
