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Temptation Island - Season 4 - Episode 10: Final Bonfire - Part 1 EngSub
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00:03Previously on Temptation Island
00:04Oh my god
00:07I think he's having sex with her to get back at me and make himself feel in control again
00:13I feel like everything we've built was just stomped on
00:16I was like I want you to be in my life
00:17Forever
00:19Like I just want you to leave
00:20I'm not leaving
00:23Oh my god I'm so nervous
00:25I'm really starting to like him and it's just an amazing feeling
00:32Good morning
00:33You look very pretty
00:35Thank you
00:35Last night Trace and I, we had a great time, Malone time
00:39And I have found an amazing connection that I can't ignore
00:45Luke and I aren't going ring shopping
00:49Never thought I would be doing this
00:50We're both going into this
00:52That's a sweet ring
00:53This is it
00:55You're not going to tempt me
01:01You're not going to tempt me
01:08You're not going to tempt me
01:11You're not going to tempt me
01:12You're not going to tempt me
01:14You're not going to tempt me
01:17You're not going to tempt me
01:20You're not going to tempt me
01:20You're not going to tempt me
01:21You're not going to tempt me
01:22You're not going to tempt me
01:22You're not going to tempt me
01:24You're not going to tempt me
01:25I want someone, someone like you, I want paradise.
01:30God, look at these booze.
01:32I know, look at them.
01:34Oh!
01:35Hi!
01:37All smiles.
01:39All smiles.
01:40We went horseback riding.
01:42I knew it!
01:44How was your day?
01:45Great.
01:46I brought him back.
01:47He's alive, guys.
01:48I'm alive.
01:49In one piece.
01:50Did you guys already talk about what you guys did
01:51during your experience?
01:52So, yesterday, Luke and I did a little shopping.
01:57Oh!
01:59I am ready to propose to Ash.
02:02Wow.
02:03So, I needed a ring, and I was wrapping things up there,
02:07and this guy decides to do a little shopping for himself.
02:11Yes, sir.
02:13Wow.
02:13Congrats, bro.
02:14Shut the up.
02:16How long did it take for you to get the ring?
02:18A lot.
02:19Ring?
02:19Ring.
02:21I've got a lot of catching up to do, I guess.
02:23Yeah.
02:24Hi, you guys.
02:25I just wanted to drop in after you got back from your dates
02:27and see how things went.
02:28If I judge by the way you look, they went great.
02:31Yeah.
02:32Yes, they did.
02:32Yes, sir.
02:33Yeah?
02:34I'm really happy that you guys had the opportunity
02:36to spend some quality time together overnight,
02:39but unfortunately, I'm the bearer of some bad news.
02:44Ladies, it's time to say goodbye.
02:47Right now?
02:48Yeah, right now.
02:49Whoa!
02:49Come on now.
02:51Girl.
02:51Why don't you take a moment, find a spot,
02:54and have a proper goodbye.
02:55And then I'll let you know when you got to go.
02:58I feel really sad.
02:59I was hoping to say goodbye at the final bonfire.
03:04So, yeah, I feel really sad that it's kind of coming to an end
03:08really quickly, and I feel like I hope I can gather all the
03:12thoughts I want to say to him before they leave.
03:17You helped me survive this, you know?
03:25I wouldn't have been able to do this without you.
03:27Find myself and figure out what true love means to me, you know?
03:32Yeah.
03:32I just hope you don't forget what you've learned here,
03:37and you've pushed really hard to continue to be this man
03:41who wants to be the best version of himself,
03:44and cares about his lady more than anything in the world.
03:50And literally...
03:51I really hope she says yes.
03:53Me too.
03:54I'm scared for you, but...
03:57I know it'll be okay.
03:59No matter what.
04:00Yeah.
04:03Well, this is a damper on the mood a little bit.
04:07Yeah.
04:08But, I mean, obviously, this is not our last conversation.
04:11I feel like we're in an amazing place.
04:13Yeah.
04:14And, you know, again, I hope you make a good decision at the end
04:19when it really comes down to it.
04:21And I'll follow through with that, like, 100%.
04:24Tracy and I just had an amazing time to see her go so quickly,
04:27that's freaking heartbreaking, and I'm not ready to see her go.
04:30We've been through a lot.
04:34But I wouldn't change it for the world.
04:36No.
04:37Are you nervous?
04:39I feel like I'm in the eye of a hurricane right now
04:41where everything's just calm.
04:43That's good, at least.
04:44I'm just confident with this.
04:45I'm gonna be able to put myself 100% on the line,
04:48even if I get rejected or she doesn't want me,
04:52then at least I've committed to myself and what I believe in.
04:57Yeah.
04:57If Iris does choose not to continue to be with Luke,
05:00I would like to further, you know, the connection with Luke
05:03because I do care about his happiness.
05:05I care about him feeling valued.
05:07I think we have a nice time together,
05:09and I think that should be appreciated.
05:12You've helped me so much.
05:15I'm glad.
05:15And you've set a standard that I need in my relationship.
05:18You're a great person.
05:19Someone that's gonna challenge me.
05:20Yep.
05:20Like, you've challenged the hell out of me out here too.
05:23Yeah.
05:23I'm not gonna let you just coast through life, Luke.
05:25All right?
05:26You can ride your skateboard, but you can't coast through life.
05:32You have come to mean so much to me in such a short amount of time.
05:37I feel so lucky and blessed to get to know you,
05:39to be able to share moments with you and experiences that I once in a lifetime.
05:50I have so much love for you.
05:52I feel the same way.
05:57I've just never met a man ever like you in my life.
06:04I appreciate everything.
06:07It's like the one thing I'd be scared of is like the whole leaving thing.
06:12I guess you can't leave if I don't let go.
06:14Don't let go then.
06:17Promise.
06:17I promise.
06:18Peace.
06:24I hope it all works out.
06:31I'll see you soon.
06:33Right?
06:33Yes.
06:34Okay.
06:35I'll see you soon.
06:36Let's go.
06:43Okay.
06:45So I want to let you know that this isn't really over until it's over when these guys have some
06:51decisions to make.
06:52And depending on how those decisions come out, we may see some of you at the final bonfire.
06:56All right.
06:57So with that, ladies, time to leave the villa.
07:06See you soon.
07:11Okay.
07:14I wish I would have just told him that, like, I want to leave with you.
07:17And I didn't.
07:21Okay.
07:22Come on.
07:23I guess I'll just go now.
07:27I guess I'll just go now.
07:35I guess I'll just go now.
07:52Wow.
07:58You're all gathered back.
08:00How's it going?
08:01How are your dates?
08:02Amazing.
08:03Awesome.
08:04So much fun.
08:04I'm glad.
08:05And I wanted to come and make sure you all made it back safely.
08:07But unfortunately, gentlemen, it's time to leave the villa.
08:12Okay?
08:14I'm going to give you guys a minute.
08:16You can say your goodbyes.
08:17And then it'll be time to leave.
08:21Oh, no.
08:22It's reality.
08:23Okay.
08:23All right.
08:24Thank you, Marge.
08:25It's been really great having Deke by my side to make me feel supported.
08:31He's helped me realize that I'm not sure if Luke and I are meant to be together.
08:35I have a lot to say.
08:37I just need to figure out how to say it.
08:39I'm glad you picked me throughout this process.
08:41I'm glad I could help you.
08:42I think I came out stronger than ever.
08:44Mm-hmm.
08:45He kind of showed me, like, a whole new way to view life and appreciate life.
08:50And a whole new way to, like, love and show the love.
08:56You know, you've worked so hard to get this Ashley out of you and everything like that.
09:01So be who you are.
09:02I know you are.
09:04All right.
09:05It's very hard to say goodbye to Blake.
09:07I never had a guy look at me the way Blake looks at me.
09:11I don't want to lose that.
09:14One last kiss.
09:15Mm-hmm.
09:19I'm just so bad at goodbyes.
09:21Yeah.
09:21Like, I just always am.
09:22It's not a goodbye.
09:23It's a see you later.
09:25Is it?
09:26What do you mean?
09:29I don't know.
09:32I want you to have your space and your independence, and I don't want to be.
09:37If you think we're leaving this island, I'm just not going to talk to you again.
09:39You're crazy.
09:41You're not just somebody that's on the back burner, and you're not just somebody that I'm
09:45not going to think about and remember.
09:47It's not that I think you're going to forget that I exist.
09:50It's just that the way that I would want to exist in your life is just not possible on
09:56either end for either one of us right now.
09:59I just can't get what I want.
10:05That has been a big lesson, because I usually get what I want.
10:13Tommy and I definitely enjoy each other's company.
10:16I think we have feelings for each other.
10:18I think there's a lot of logistical things that are working against us, but we are just
10:23going to continue talking and seeing how life goes.
10:29I really care about you.
10:32I do.
10:34And I keep repeating it, but I don't want you to take any steps back.
10:41I'm not going to move backwards.
10:45I hope so.
10:47I know that you're waiting to see if that's true.
10:52Time always tells.
10:53You're a growing woman.
10:55You know how it is.
10:56Words are words.
10:57Actions speak.
10:58I know.
11:00Taylor thinks if he's not there, I'm going to just go with Hanya.
11:05And I don't think that our conversation got rid of that.
11:09I think that he's testing me now.
11:12I came in testing Hanya, and now I am being tested by Taylor.
11:15And I'm just, I'm not sure what I'm going to do.
11:18But I know no matter what happens, I'm going to do what's right for me.
11:27Okay, I'm sorry guys, but it's time to wrap up these conversations and meet me up here, okay?
11:32Good for you.
11:33Thank you for everything.
11:35One more kiss.
11:35Just one last time.
11:36Yeah, of course.
11:37Bye.
11:38I'm standing in the window with the light wrapped around you.
11:42Silhouettes are golden.
11:43I feel safe all around you.
11:46Everything I wanted I knew I had.
11:50That's how I remember you.
11:53Okay.
11:55I know this is tough, you guys.
11:58You guys have come a long way.
12:00These have become bonds that have gotten deeper and deeper.
12:04But ladies, you have your final bonfires coming up.
12:08So, with that, gentlemen, it's time to leave.
12:13Bye, Vic.
12:15Bye, Vic.
12:21See you guys.
12:27Bye, guys.
12:30I have never cried this much in my entire life.
12:35Sometimes love doesn't last.
12:51How are your thoughts going?
12:53In my head, I'm like, I want to walk away so badly and just, like, stand strong.
12:58Forget LaSalle's.
13:00And then my heart is like, give him a little time.
13:04Give him a chance.
13:06Blah, blah, blah.
13:07Yeah, so that's where I'm at.
13:09So, I don't know.
13:11Coming to Temptation Island, I wanted to marry LaSalle's,
13:14but we were lacking our own independence,
13:17lacking gratitude towards each other,
13:19lacking the romance.
13:21Like, we never had that emotional deep conversation before.
13:24Blake definitely taught me how to be in my emotions, feel it.
13:29I want to kiss you right now.
13:30You can kiss me.
13:35My journey on Temptation Island took a turn when I heard LaSalle say,
13:39forget Ashley.
13:40Forget Ashley.
13:41She's in the past.
13:42It really hurt me inside.
13:44I felt so disrespected.
13:45Like, how can he ever say that?
13:48Our seven years together wasn't real at all.
13:51Like, did he really love me?
13:53Going into this final bonfire, I'm not sure what to expect.
13:57We could be throwing away our seven-year relationship.
13:59And I just don't know what I'm going to do.
14:02But I do know what I deserve.
14:04And if walking away is that decision for me,
14:07then walking away is what's best for me.
14:09You're gonna be okay.
14:13You gotta fly, gotta fly away.
14:17No need to be afraid.
14:21I've been on the fence so much these past couple of weeks on, like, what do I want to do?
14:25What's the right decision for me?
14:26And I have had so much guilt on me.
14:28And it's just a psychological warfare.
14:34Ashley and I were very complacent before coming to the island.
14:37We didn't really challenge each other intellectually or emotionally.
14:40I know the emotion is in you, but maybe it takes someone else to bring that emotion.
14:51Model.
14:52Work it.
14:53Who's catching your attention?
14:54You, of course.
14:56That's not obvious.
14:58One person in particular who's challenged me on the daily has been Trace.
15:01When Trace calls you on your stuff, it actually feels like love to you, doesn't it?
15:07It feels like that's what I'm missing.
15:10Ashley and I came here to work on our independence.
15:14But I ended up falling in love with someone else.
15:16I can't see my life without you.
15:18I love you.
15:20Trace and I have hit a lot of speed bumps.
15:22But I'm super thankful just for having those experiences with her.
15:27I love you.
15:27I love you.
15:28I love you, too.
15:29Oh, you said it.
15:30You said it.
15:31You said it.
15:34It's hard for me to say where my relationship with Ashley will go.
15:37Anything can happen at the final bonfire.
15:40I have to do some deep thinking right now.
15:55There's something deep inside of Edgar that he still hasn't dealt with.
16:00If he's acting out like that, yeah.
16:04Hi.
16:05Jillian and Edgar.
16:06Hi.
16:07I came to the island because I needed to see if my college relationship was what I wanted.
16:14I just feel like I'm cutting off like a part of who I am.
16:19I came in very dependent on Edgar.
16:21Every problem I had was Edgar will solve it.
16:24That made me forget who I am deep down.
16:28I love you.
16:29This is all.
16:30So.
16:31So.
16:32I feel like my number one goal here was to embrace the experience.
16:35And I feel like I absolutely did that.
16:37I definitely feel like out of everybody, I feel like I have the most fun with you.
16:42Through this experience, I have learned to let my walls down and take chances.
16:47And then Edgar had sex with one of the girls.
16:52This is insane.
16:55I am not excited to see him.
16:59That a part of me really loves him still.
17:02And sitting across from him and not hugging him is gonna be really hard.
17:08I'm gonna carry that flame inside all the way to the finish line.
17:16Carry that flame.
17:19Carry that flame.
17:21How are you feeling about getting to see Jillian?
17:24I'm looking back.
17:26You know, I was all in on Jillian.
17:28And when the bonfires came, I feel like I didn't see Jillian.
17:33At least the Jillian that I knew.
17:35And that hurt, man.
17:37That sent me through a loop.
17:41When I first came to the island, I had my heart set on Jillian.
17:45I love you, Papi.
17:46I love you too.
17:47Every bonfire hurt.
17:49Honestly, the one that hurt the most was the very first bonfire.
17:52I don't know if I will continue wearing the promise ring.
17:57It sounds like the ring doesn't mean anything to her anymore.
18:01It meant the world to me, Mark.
18:04It was because of this pain that made me realize I should challenge myself to make a connection.
18:09When I look at Marissa, I feel like I can see into her soul.
18:16I did get intimate with Marissa.
18:22And it is beautiful.
18:34I know that some of the things that I've done have hurt Jillian.
18:37But also, I don't know if I want to apologize for something that's made me happy.
18:41But I really thought that I'd be leaving this island with Jillian.
18:45And I just don't know.
18:46Love me, love, or let me go.
18:54Love me, love me, love me, love me, love me.
19:04You're all i know is you.
19:07All i know is you.
19:18I'm feeling very nervous for the final bonfire, just seeing Edgar and being in front of him,
19:23because I am in pain over the way he hurt me, and sitting across from him is going to be
19:29really
19:29hard. At this point, I feel like I know exactly what I want. I've had a lot of time here
19:35to think
19:36about a lot of things and get some answers, but at the same time, I don't know what to expect,
19:41and I have no idea what's going on with him.
19:50I don't think I have fully dealt with the fact that I'm going to be seeing Jillian.
20:07Once we come together, we will be coming terms with our new reality, and I don't know exactly
20:13what that holds. Hi, Edgar. Hey, Mark. Glad to see you, pal. Good to see you too, man. You look
20:20terrific. Thank you, sir. How do you feel about seeing Jillian right now? I'm excited to see Jillian,
20:26but I'm also nervous to see Jillian. Okay. I'm going to bring her out.
20:44Hi, Jillian. Hi, Mark. Welcome to your final bonfire.
20:49So this is how the final bonfire works. You both will get the chance to speak while the other
20:54person listens. Then you'll get the opportunity to have an open conversation. After that, you'll
21:00make your final decisions. Jillian, I'm going to let you speak first. Okay. I'm very grateful
21:11for you in my life and the awesome relationship we've had. You were the first guy ever in my life
21:19who I let in and really got to know truly who I am, and I think you were the first
21:26person to push
21:27past the walls that I put up with men. That was very valuable to me, and I think that I
21:36didn't ever
21:37want to lose that part of myself that you brought out of me. I do think on my time here,
21:44I've come to
21:45realize that I can do that for myself, and therefore, if we were to continue this relationship,
21:51I feel that I would be more secure and a better partner in general. But I do feel extremely disrespected
22:02by a couple of things. Hearing you tell me through the camera, like, leave me the f**k alone.
22:10I also had to watch you sleep with the girl you've been with.
22:19I mean, that just hurt so bad. I have been there before with you, and this time around,
22:27it hurts just as much, if not worse. Edgar, you honored her by listening. Jillian, now your turn
22:35to listen to Edgar. It makes me really happy to hear that you have had a journey of growth on
22:42your
22:42own. I'm so grateful for the last three years that we've had together, and I thank you for vocalizing
22:48the way you have felt. I completely hear you. I can't imagine how much it hurts, and I know we've
22:55had
22:55uncomfortable times. I know I cheated on you, and I broke your trust, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry to do
23:05that to us. I'm sorry to do that to you. What I did with Marissa was not to hurt you.
23:10What I did
23:11with Marissa was something that I felt. It was an act of choice, because the first few weeks,
23:16you put me through so much pain. I know you and what's-his-face. You know, you got intimate,
23:21and I'm happy that you could find someone that you could be intimate with. So there was a clip
23:25where he kissed you, and he leaned back, and you had these eyes that you used to look at me
23:30like
23:30whenever I would kiss you. And I did see you in bed with him, and that hurt. And I saw
23:37you two in
23:37the shower, and that really hurt. But what hurt most of all was the initial clip when you spoke so
23:43dismissively over the ring. Every single time I came to a bonfire, it just felt like you threw me
23:48outside the window. And I came to a point where I needed to stop focusing and holding on to the
23:57pain that I was feeling from your actions, and just be open and vulnerable. And that is when I
24:05connected a little deeper with Marissa emotionally first. You say you didn't want to hurt me, and you
24:13didn't want to disrespect me. It confuses me why you couldn't wait to have sex with Marissa
24:20until this was all over, and I didn't have to sit there and watch it. Because I didn't have sex
24:26with
24:27Tommy. Like, I'm curious what happened in that shower scene. Watching you lean in to kiss him,
24:35just grabbing him. And then after that, watching you look at him with these eyes of love,
24:42that hurt much more than if I would have seen you have sex with him.
24:50Just because, like, the kissing was the thing that hurt you more than maybe me having sex
24:56doesn't mean the same goes for me. And I wasn't sure about what would hurt you more.
25:01And like I said, I didn't do anything to... So you risked it? You just risked hurting me like that?
25:10Jillian, what hurt the most was the ring. I don't want to invalidate your pain at all,
25:18but we can't compare my comment about the promise ring to you having sex with somebody.
25:23Just felt like you just threw those three years, like, immediately out the window.
25:27I also, like, made the decision to take the ring off after I watched you have sex with Marissa.
25:32They're not equal. I don't think we should compare.
25:36I just... To me, it's alarming to hear that you're saying that you didn't want to hurt me,
25:42but then you did anyway.
25:45Did you want to hurt me?
25:47No.
25:48And then you did anyway.
25:54And to be honest, you kind of hurt me by bringing me here,
25:58and you should have broken up with me.
26:12To be honest, you kind of hurt me by bringing me here,
26:15and you should have broken up with me.
26:20I think I was trying very hard to regain what we once had,
26:25and I had hope that we would.
26:27You started hurting me the second you started lying to me.
26:31You lied to me for about nine months.
26:33I know that I perhaps was...
26:35I was the inciting incident for that because I did cheat on you.
26:37But you continuously lied to me and looked me in the face
26:40and told me you loved me for nine months.
26:43And I still don't understand how you did that.
26:47I apologize that you feel that I was lying to you for all that time about loving you.
26:53I wasn't.
26:54I didn't know because I have never been in a serious relationship,
26:59and I've never been cheated on in a serious relationship.
27:02But now I know for the future that, like,
27:04that's something you really can't bounce back from.
27:09Guys, now it's time to make a decision.
27:11I'm going to give you three options.
27:13You can leave the island the way you came here, together as a couple.
27:17You could leave alone.
27:20Or you can leave with someone else.
27:22And, Edgar, I'll start with you.
27:25Jillian, may I hold your hand?
27:28Sure.
27:32I love you.
27:35And I thank you.
27:37And I wish nothing but the best for you in life.
27:40But I'm going to leave alone.
27:43Because I know that I have a lot more growth to do on my own.
27:48I love you.
27:54Jillian, you've heard Edgar's decision.
27:58And now it's important to tell Edgar what you've decided.
28:05I feel all the same things.
28:07I am very, very grateful for you.
28:10I'm going to make the same choice.
28:13I'm going to leave alone.
28:16And you're a really good guy.
28:19I just hope that you don't hurt people anymore.
28:23And I'm going to try to do the same.
28:31Jillian, thank you for your honesty.
28:33I know how difficult that was.
28:35And you may leave the island.
28:42You give me a hug if you want.
28:52I'm kidding.
28:54Can I give you a kiss on the floor?
28:55No.
28:57Sorry.
28:58That's all good.
29:01I guess we'll talk when we talk.
29:05Safe travels, G.
29:06Can I give you a hug, Mark?
29:08Oh.
29:09I wish you the best.
29:11I have no doubt you're going to find it.
29:15All right.
29:15Travel safe.
29:16Thanks.
29:18Thanks.
29:44I feel pretty terrible.
29:49I feel like that conversation
29:54just reaffirmed things for me.
29:56I don't know how to start again.
30:05I just don't think Edgar understands how much he's hurt me.
30:09It's just all shocking.
30:11This is really the end of our relationship,
30:13and this is a moment I've been avoiding.
30:15I'm really alone now.
30:17I think that's for the best.
30:30Let's sit for a second, Ag.
30:36I know how hard that must have been.
30:40How are you feeling right now?
30:42Like I lost a little piece of myself.
30:46That's real.
30:49Oh, man.
30:54I'm so overwhelmed.
30:55I just feel a lot of conflict in my heart right now.
30:59But I want to continue to talk to Marissa.
31:01You've got to do what's right for you.
31:03I just want you to be clear before you leave.
31:12I would like to talk to Marissa.
31:15Okay.
31:15And then you'll have to make a decision.
31:17Yeah.
31:17Okay.
31:18Okay.
31:22Marissa.
31:22Hi.
31:23Welcome to Bonfire.
31:25Hi.
31:26Hi.
31:27I want to let you know that Jillian has decided to leave alone.
31:31And Edgar has voiced a decision but is conflicted.
31:37We felt it'd be good to talk to you.
31:42Okay.
31:45I, um, I've been so grateful for the patience that you've had with me and teaching me to
31:55take my time, not jumping into things.
31:58So, um, I do feel conflicted in my heart because I just saw Jillian.
32:06Yeah.
32:09But I also know that I am letting go of Jillian just as she is letting go of me.
32:15And I want to continue to get to know you.
32:17But I want to take things as slow as possible.
32:20Me too.
32:21Me too.
32:28Um, I would like to leave the island with you.
32:31Really?
32:31Yeah.
32:33I would love to.
32:35I am relieved to hear you both say that you want to take it slow and right.
32:40Edgar and Marissa, hopefully this is the beginning of finding love on Temptation Island for the
32:44two of you.
32:44And you two can now leave the island together.
32:47Yay!
32:49Finally.
32:50Finally.
33:04I was so conflicted sitting there with Mark after Jillian left.
33:09But, you know, when Marissa came down and she said, you know, I want to take things slow.
33:13That reminded me that the feeling that I had is correct.
33:16I am with you.
33:18Love is a tender thing.
33:25I've never met anyone in my life like this man here.
33:30He's just been so patient, kind, and that's something that I really needed in my life at this time.
33:37It's you.
33:38The same one I picked.
33:40Cause you understood.
33:42I'm excited to leave.
33:44I am with you.
33:48I am with you.
33:51I am with you.
33:57I step out alone this time.
34:01And this city is toxic and everything looks like you.
34:08I am nervous to go into the final bonfire because there may be like that emotions of like, oh, I
34:14really miss him.
34:15I miss his hugs, his kisses.
34:17But I'm going to try my best not to go back.
34:20I replayed the last timeline when I held you in my arms.
34:26You told me to let it go.
34:30I'm definitely feeling nervous.
34:32Getting a lot of butterflies in my stomach is one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make in
34:36my life.
34:37I know what I want to say and I know what I'm going to say.
34:40But when you have to look someone in the eye and tell them how you feel, it's another thing coming.
34:44I'm sorry that I broke you down.
34:48I let you down, oh.
34:55I can't explain how nerve-wracking it makes me feel that, you know, this might be my final chance seeing
35:01Ashley again to talk to her.
35:03How you doing, LaSales?
35:04Great. How you doing, Mark?
35:05Welcome back.
35:06Thank you. Thank you.
35:11Welcome to your final bonfire, LaSales.
35:13Thank you, Mark.
35:14How you feeling right now?
35:15A bit nervous, but also excited to see Ashley.
35:18It's, you know, she's my best friend.
35:20I'm sure there's going to be some things put on the table that, you know, we might not like, but
35:23it's the truth.
35:24So I'm a little nervous about that as well.
35:26Okay.
35:27We'll bring her in right now.
35:28Sounds good.
35:35Hi, Ashley.
35:42You look beautiful.
35:45You remember this guy, right?
35:47Do I?
35:48Um, welcome, Ashley.
35:50So this is how the final bonfire works.
35:53You both will get the chance to speak while the other person listens.
35:56Then, you'll get the opportunity to have an open conversation.
36:00After that, you'll make your final decisions.
36:04LaSales, I'm going to let you speak first.
36:14First off, I want to say I love you so deeply.
36:17I care about you more than you can imagine, but I'm so super happy that you've invited me to this
36:24journey where I can truly focus on myself with no distractions.
36:27Just focus on me and have those deep, intimate conversations.
36:31I've been able to really dig deep.
36:34You'd be surprised how many times I've cried.
36:36I cried probably over 15 times being here.
36:39But it took me to get out of our relationship for me to, like, man, why do I feel this
36:44way?
36:45I mean, you know me.
36:45I care about you so much.
36:46I've been so emotionally invested in you.
36:49When you feel things, I feel it.
36:51And you've only seen me cry, like, one time.
36:54But you also have to realize maybe you didn't give me the space to do so because we were just
36:57so wrapped up in all this busyness.
36:59I had you on my mind the whole time.
37:03However, I had to fully invest myself in this, knowing that you're going to be doing the same thing.
37:08But pretty much there was one person that was super beneficial in my growth, and her name was Trace.
37:14You've probably seen her in a couple of bonfire clips.
37:16And she is an amazing person.
37:20And Trace has challenged me to become a better version of myself.
37:24And I hope you had the exact same experience.
37:28Ashley, now it's your turn to tell LaSalle about the experience you've had and what you've learned.
37:37So the very beginning of this journey, you know, I was a bit shy.
37:41It was very overwhelming.
37:42And to be honest, I was thinking about you.
37:45I was like, I wonder what LaSalle's is doing on the other side.
37:49It kind of took me to a point where, oh, shit, I can't think about you all this, like, so
37:53many times because I'm kind of distracting myself from growing and having my own self-journey.
38:01And then I met Blake.
38:04And he's helped me so much.
38:07I really appreciate him.
38:08I'm so grateful for him.
38:09He genuinely cares and so sweet and so open about everything.
38:15What really upset me, this whole thing, was every single bonfire clip was you disrespecting me.
38:24The main two bonfire clips that hurt me so much was the part when you said, you were telling Trish,
38:34like, forget about Ashley.
38:35I want you as my girlfriend, my wife.
38:37You're the one I need in my life.
38:40And then the last one, you said, I love you.
38:42And then she responded, I love you, too.
38:44I was mad and angry, upset.
38:47Everyone watching, they felt sorry for me.
38:50I definitely don't deserve that, especially after seven years.
38:53And I didn't see growth in those clips.
38:55I didn't see that you really, truly love yourself in those clips.
39:00It's just, I was lost with words.
39:03That's not how love really looks like.
39:06That's honestly all I have to say for now.
39:09All right.
39:11Now, you can both take the time to discuss what you both heard and ask any questions you still need
39:17the answers to.
39:19I want to first address the Trace thing.
39:22I didn't mean any disrespect saying, oh, forget Ashley, blah, blah, blah, because I was trying to make a point.
39:26Because she kept bringing you up, and I said, listen, let's just focus on us right now.
39:30And that wasn't meant out of disrespect, because I truly, genuinely care about her.
39:35A lot.
39:36And I wasn't expecting to say, I love you.
39:38It came out, but I was like, but that sounded right, and it felt right.
39:42It just felt genuine.
39:43The fact that I haven't been able to just emotionally express myself.
39:46And be yourself.
39:47And be myself.
39:48It's sad.
39:49You know what I'm saying?
39:50And I wish we would have had that before we got here.
39:53You know, because we wouldn't be here.
39:55So I feel every word you're saying.
39:58I just want to say, I'm sorry I didn't give you the space to be who you are, and that
40:06strong, independent man that I know you're capable of becoming.
40:09Because now I see that I kind of just kind of took advantage of you in a way where you
40:20only focused on me.
40:25And you never put yourself first.
40:27I'm sorry.
40:27I'm sorry.
40:31I'm sorry.
40:33I'm sorry.
40:34No, I was about to do.
40:35Because that could have been better.
40:37I'm sorry.
40:52It's so crazy.
40:54Like, my mind.
40:55I'm learning how to balance my mind and my heart.
40:59And I kind of want to follow my heart so badly.
41:02Follow it.
41:03Follow your heart.
41:03I don't want you to regret anything.
41:06Keep that in mind.
41:07You have my blessings no matter what, okay?
41:10I'm sitting here listening to the two of you, and I heard you say you want to follow your heart,
41:15and you have his blessing to follow your heart.
41:17What's your decision?
41:29My decision tonight is...
41:35I want to...
41:42Leave with you and work things out.
41:53That's what you want?
41:55The cells?
41:55Now it's time you've got to tell Ashley and me what you want.
42:00I want to know.
42:12Leaving me.
42:13Did you do it again?
42:14I want to take to change.
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