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Transcript
00:00:01New intimacy level unlocked.
00:00:08New skin, dangerously hot, is equipped.
00:00:17You're staring. You like what you see?
00:00:20Maybe.
00:00:29When are you gonna tell me who you really are?
00:00:31You know who I really am. I'm Valaqueen33.
00:00:34Such a dumb username.
00:00:36Oh, okay, guacamolewizard275. Don't talk to me about dumb usernames.
00:00:41You know, you're lucky you're cute.
00:00:42You don't even know what I look like.
00:00:44Well, I would if you agreed to meet me in person. Or at least a photo.
00:00:49Maybe someday.
00:00:54Crap, I'm late.
00:00:56Good luck, Skylacher Queen.
00:01:00Who needs luck when I have my talisman to remind me of my knight?
00:01:08In the game of castle claimers, I might be a warrior princess in love with a dashing knight.
00:01:13But on my first day at Edmunds Academy, I feel like a peasant.
00:01:18Watch it. This isn't public school.
00:01:22Forget your training wheels.
00:01:25At least I have my knight's charm to help me get through the day.
00:01:39Stop, stop, stop, stop the car!
00:01:43No!
00:01:45God, my knight's special talisman!
00:01:48It's ruined!
00:01:55He's so hot!
00:01:56Hey! I told you to stop the car!
00:02:03Oh my gosh, it's cold!
00:02:05He's so hot!
00:02:10Hey!
00:02:11What is wrong with you?
00:02:13Didn't you see me yelling and screaming for you to stop the car?
00:02:16Okay, I see you now, new girl.
00:02:18What are you with me, son?
00:02:20What are you talking about?
00:02:22Why?
00:02:24I thought you were one of my fans.
00:02:26No, I'm not one of your fans.
00:02:29You just broke something that's really important to me.
00:02:32Yeah, I broke a lot of hearts, buttercup.
00:02:34Okay?
00:02:36You should know that.
00:02:38I don't know who you are, but you were a...
00:02:41You were a...
00:02:42Eh...
00:02:43Eh...
00:02:43Eh...
00:02:44Asshole!
00:02:50All right.
00:02:51I broke something of yours.
00:02:53Sure, but...
00:02:54Hey!
00:02:56You got my attention.
00:02:59So, in that case, we're even.
00:03:06Don't do it, Hayley.
00:03:09Have a good day.
00:03:12Don't do it!
00:03:15I got a hot mess energy.
00:03:17Oh!
00:03:20Oh, fuck!
00:03:22Now we're even.
00:03:24My laptop better not be broken.
00:03:26I can't lose my connection to Valley Queen.
00:03:33You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:37You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:39I'm going to make every classroom,
00:03:42every hallway,
00:03:44and every rumor.
00:03:45In this school,
00:03:46you're a personal nightmare.
00:03:48I'm going to make your life a living out.
00:03:51What's going on?
00:03:52Cole's fighting the new girl.
00:03:53Now Cole's leaving the new girl.
00:03:55Yeah, idiot.
00:03:56I can see that.
00:03:59Just met an unhinged person.
00:04:01Good thing the universe balances it with you.
00:04:04Same.
00:04:05Ran into a certified asshole.
00:04:07Can't wait to see you in the game tonight.
00:04:11Cole, do you need help?
00:04:13I can help you.
00:04:16The new girl poured coffee on him.
00:04:18This bitch thinks that she can just roll up and piss off Michael.
00:04:21But he's not your Cole.
00:04:22Shut up, Lindsey.
00:04:24He's not yet.
00:04:26Come on.
00:04:28Hi.
00:04:29I'm Jen.
00:04:30And this is Lindsey.
00:04:32Hi.
00:04:34I'm Haley.
00:04:35So nice to meet you.
00:04:36You have first day jitters.
00:04:37That's totally understandable.
00:04:38We want to make sure you feel really welcome.
00:04:40And so we'll take you to your locker.
00:04:42Come in.
00:04:44Go there.
00:04:44Let's go.
00:04:48Uh, there you go.
00:04:50Thanks so much.
00:05:12Oh, you're welcome, new girl.
00:05:14Honestly, it's kind of an improvement on your face.
00:05:23Guacamole wizard.
00:05:24Wow.
00:05:25What are you, catfishing some little lonely online gamer boy?
00:05:29Get it back.
00:05:30Hold on.
00:05:32Hey, if you go to Edmunds Academy, you should come to Locker 83 right now.
00:05:37Send.
00:05:37Here.
00:05:38Now your little gamer friend can see your ugly little face.
00:05:42So when can I meet the hero who ruined your billionaire shirt?
00:05:45I'm your friend first, Max.
00:05:47At least check on me.
00:05:48Oh, is it the online lover?
00:05:50All right, chill, please.
00:05:55No way.
00:05:56What is it?
00:05:57Oh, Belle Queen goes to the school.
00:06:05Please ignore that.
00:06:06Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:06:09Send.
00:06:13What is wrong with you?
00:06:14You messed with Cole Edmunds and you're going to mess with me.
00:06:17Edmunds?
00:06:18What?
00:06:19You don't know that his family owns the whole school?
00:06:22Wow.
00:06:22You really did crawl out of the gutter, didn't you?
00:06:26Stop recording me!
00:06:29Jen is a new girl.
00:06:31Wait.
00:06:32Is the new girl...
00:06:34Valley Queen?
00:06:37There's no way the new girl is Valley Queen.
00:06:39Could it be...
00:06:40Jen?
00:06:43Ew.
00:06:46Your enemy is our enemy Cole.
00:06:49And I just made sure that the new girl knows that.
00:06:52No chance it's Jen.
00:06:53So is it...
00:06:55She does look kinda cute.
00:06:59Even I can feel the tension in the room...
00:07:02But we're into...
00:07:03Please ignore that.
00:07:05Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:07:08What was I thinking?
00:07:09Of course she's not my online lover.
00:07:15Hey there, buttercup.
00:07:17Keep walking, Hayley.
00:07:18Just keep walking.
00:07:19Did you get a problem with shaving this morning, or...?
00:07:23My name's Hayley.
00:07:25Well, Hayley.
00:07:26I think you, uh...
00:07:28You used to spell on your upper lip right there.
00:07:32What a coincidence!
00:07:34So did you!
00:07:35Oh, no!
00:07:38Oh, I'm sorry.
00:07:40I forgot you don't even need shaving cream.
00:07:42You're just a man-child with follicle issues.
00:07:48Whatever ends up with her, I must have failed an eye exam.
00:08:03I was so relieved to see you.
00:08:05Something happened today.
00:08:06I lost the game.
00:08:07I thought I'd never see you again.
00:08:10I think it's time we call this what it is.
00:08:13And what is this?
00:08:14What I think it is, is...
00:08:17I wanna be with you, and you wanna be with me.
00:08:21As more than just friends.
00:08:23Oh, thank God.
00:08:25I honestly want that more than anything.
00:08:27You're my soulmate.
00:08:28Like, I like you so much.
00:08:29Okay, well, since we're dating now, um...
00:08:33I'm ready to send my photo.
00:08:36Wait, really?
00:08:37Yeah.
00:08:38Get ready.
00:08:44Okay.
00:08:45No face.
00:08:47Just the boobs.
00:08:49Is it a bad idea?
00:08:50But all my online friends said it's cool.
00:08:53PG-13 nudes are harmless.
00:08:55All the kids do this.
00:08:56You'll love it.
00:09:01This lighting hates me.
00:09:03Come on, Hayley.
00:09:05Confidence.
00:09:05You literally fight dragons online.
00:09:12Okay.
00:09:13Yeah.
00:09:14That's actually kind of...
00:09:15Oh, my God.
00:09:21Seriously?
00:09:22Hello?
00:09:23Anyone?
00:09:25Don't look at me!
00:09:30Don't look at me!
00:09:31Shut up for volleyball, are we?
00:09:32I don't think you're supposed to do it like that.
00:09:35Get out!
00:09:36Now!
00:09:37Fine.
00:09:38Out!
00:09:39Damn it!
00:09:43Come on.
00:10:17You're helping me.
00:10:18Yeah, well, I didn't point on it, but here we are.
00:10:24Yeah.
00:10:27Excuse you.
00:10:28These boobs are for someone else.
00:10:30I have a boyfriend, do we?
00:10:31That is shocking.
00:10:33Yeah, actually.
00:10:34And he'd probably kill you right now if he saw me flirting with me.
00:10:37Flirting?
00:10:38Yeah, don't lie to yourself.
00:10:39I've got a girlfriend too.
00:10:40My thoughts and prayers to her.
00:10:41Funny.
00:10:43Okay, well, can we just pretend this didn't happen and go our separate ways?
00:10:47Fine by me.
00:10:50Oh, I know.
00:10:53Of all the purple bra, by the way.
00:10:55I like it in a weird way.
00:10:57I mean, not even my type, but, you know, power theory.
00:11:00I don't know.
00:11:01Would you just get out of here?
00:11:11Hopefully, guacamole wizard will like it too.
00:11:14Jen, red alert.
00:11:16Cole and the new girl are for sure flirting.
00:11:18I think it's time to take drastic action.
00:11:23Don't be a coward.
00:11:24Just send it.
00:11:26Jen.
00:11:30Oh my god.
00:11:32Here goes nothing.
00:11:40Still no response?
00:11:42Don't freak out.
00:11:43He's probably just busy.
00:11:48Give it back.
00:11:48Why?
00:11:49You don't want me to see your slutty little nude?
00:11:52Oh, this is actually a really good photo.
00:11:54Honestly, it's so good that I think the whole school should see it.
00:11:57Did you get it, Lindsay?
00:11:58Mm-hmm.
00:12:00Got it.
00:12:02What are you doing?
00:12:07What are you doing?
00:12:11No, no, no, no.
00:12:29Oh, shit.
00:12:31Oh
00:12:33Yeah, what's going on dude your enemies new just got put up on the big screen. What's yeah?
00:12:54Photoshop
00:13:10Oh my brave night, I wish you were here with me right now
00:13:18Oh my god, oh cool fair enemies kind of hot
00:13:23Since you're so into slutty photos, why don't we just go ahead and go full nude?
00:13:31No
00:13:50My school enemy is my online girlfriend
00:13:53Get off of me
00:13:56Stop it
00:13:59Oh my god
00:14:01Oh my god
00:14:23What the hell Cole? I thought you'd be happy
00:14:30How does it feel being exposed to the whole school? Not good, huh?
00:14:34Now if you don't delete it off your phone, I'm exposed what else is fake about you and I know
00:14:38it's not just your purse
00:14:39Oh
00:14:40Why are you even defending her? She's the loser who has nude photos for random men
00:14:46He's got more personality than all of you combined and if you mess with her you mess with me you
00:14:51hear me
00:14:56Hey
00:14:56Hey, where are you?
00:14:57Cole is on my side now?
00:14:58Is he doing this to play with my feelings?
00:15:01I just need to be alone
00:15:02Hey
00:15:08Cole is a rich asshole and he said we were enemies
00:15:12But why did I get butterflies when he looked at me today?
00:15:18Don't stay up too late honey
00:15:20Love you mom
00:15:23Wait mom
00:15:27Do people change?
00:15:31Like can a spoiled brat somehow become nice?
00:15:37Well, maybe just give them a second chance
00:15:57What's up there, huh?
00:15:59There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria. They're my favorite
00:16:03Noted. Is that all?
00:16:05The whole school treats me like I'm their punching bag
00:16:07I'm just trying to bring a little hope to my family and keep my scholarship
00:16:12Oh, I'm really proud of you
00:16:15And then there's this guy
00:16:16He has this vendetta against me, but at the same time he's super contradictory
00:16:20It's so confusing
00:16:22Sounds like you're into this guy
00:16:25Sounds like you're into this guy
00:16:26No, I'm not into this guy
00:16:28I like you
00:16:29Only you
00:16:35I really liked your photo by the way
00:16:37You did?
00:16:38Are you gonna risk for Kate?
00:16:40I was thinking it would be better if we met in person
00:16:43That sounds amazing
00:16:44When? Where?
00:16:45About after school
00:16:46At the balcony
00:16:47I'll bring flowers
00:16:48Deal
00:16:58I'm about to meet my boyfriend
00:17:00I'm about to meet my boyfriend
00:17:10Stop thinking about Cole
00:17:19Call me father
00:17:20I heard about you harassing Jen at school today
00:17:23Defending that nobody
00:17:25Haley girl
00:17:26He's not a nobody dad
00:17:27Are those for her?
00:17:33What the fuck?
00:17:37What the fuck?
00:17:38I know what Haley is, Cole
00:17:41I know what Haley is, Cole
00:17:41Her mother works as a maid at my office
00:17:44That whole family is trash
00:17:45Stay away from her
00:17:47And what if I say no?
00:17:48Stay away from Haley Cole
00:17:50Or I'll fire her mother
00:17:53What if she found out that you were the one making her life miserable
00:17:56I'm almost 18
00:17:57Soon I'll have my inheritance
00:17:59I hate to make Haley wait
00:18:01But she can't know who I am before I make sure her family is safe
00:18:06You're sick
00:18:08It's called watching out for your future
00:18:16Oh, hi
00:18:18I am Haley
00:18:19Yes
00:18:20Mm-hmm
00:18:21So nice to meet you
00:18:22God
00:18:24I'd give anything just to hear her say my name
00:18:26But the moment she knows
00:18:27I lose her forever
00:18:31Thank you for the flowers
00:18:33You're so nice
00:18:38Guacamole wizard
00:18:40Fail
00:18:44Guacamole wizard
00:18:45Ew
00:18:47You waiting for your stupid little secret boyfriend?
00:18:50He's pathetic
00:18:51Maybe he's married
00:18:53Or maybe he's fat
00:18:54And maybe he's sitting on his wife's video
00:18:58I don't want any more trouble
00:19:01Why is guacamole wizard still not here?
00:19:03Oh no, we're not here to give you any trouble
00:19:05We just noticed that you didn't have any lunch
00:19:07And so we thought we would bring you a sandwich
00:19:11Eat it
00:19:26So you thought you could humiliate me in front of the entire school?
00:19:31you're a maid's daughter so you can go ahead and eat trash guacamole wizard where are you
00:19:37oh and by the way cole's not gonna come save you because after all he's rich like me
00:19:47i'm nothing like you
00:19:52yeah i'm nothing like you
00:19:56cole again why is he always here when i need help
00:20:00pick it up
00:20:01cole we were kidding it's ketchup
00:20:04pick that bloody thing up
00:20:09take out your phone and record this
00:20:18didn't your dad tell you not to mess with hayley anymore
00:20:21don't think you have leverage here
00:20:23cause i'll tell your mom how fucked up you are
00:20:25you wanna hold that thing next to your face and do what i say
00:20:30i will leave hayley alone
00:20:35i will leave hayley alone
00:20:37i will leave hayley alone
00:20:58uh thank you
00:21:00wow
00:21:02never thought i'd hear you say that
00:21:06why do you keep following me around
00:21:08i just
00:21:10i happen to see you
00:21:12were you waiting on someone
00:21:14yeah my boyfriend actually
00:21:19well he
00:21:20he kind of stood me up so
00:21:22maybe you didn't do it on purpose
00:21:26maybe
00:21:26maybe you gotta do it nice today
00:21:28cole are you being nice to me
00:21:31you
00:21:32thought we were enemies
00:21:34i mean i still find you incredibly annoying though
00:21:36so
00:21:36am i that annoying
00:21:38maybe you'll like me once you realize i have layers
00:21:40are you trying to play with my feelings
00:21:42coldness
00:21:43cause it's not gonna work
00:21:44i'm like those stupid spoiled heiresses
00:21:52how'd that online boyfriend
00:21:53make you fall for her
00:21:58he
00:21:59he
00:21:59he makes me feel safe
00:22:02you wouldn't understand
00:22:03you wouldn't understand it though
00:22:07i understand better than you think
00:22:11cole understands me better than i think
00:22:15i don't see
00:22:17why you touch him like this
00:22:29if you keep staring i'm gonna think you like what you see
00:22:32no
00:22:33no my
00:22:34my boyfriend has way better abs than you do
00:22:39in the game
00:22:42aww in the game huh
00:22:49why does he have to smell so good
00:22:55are you that slow in the game too
00:22:59i can see why he likes you
00:23:10i can't do this
00:23:13i love my boyfriend
00:23:15and you will never understand that
00:23:16he's
00:23:17smart and he's kind and
00:23:20he loves me for who i am
00:23:22that is so much more important to me
00:23:24than whatever this is between us
00:23:27i wish i could just tell her right now
00:23:36wait it couldn't be
00:23:40cole what was that notification on your phone
00:23:50what was that notification on your phone
00:23:52it was my dad telling me my car
00:23:55i got done getting waxed
00:23:57champagne problems huh
00:24:01you live such a tough life
00:24:06what was i thinking
00:24:08we are from two different worlds
00:24:10he just wants to play with me
00:24:11you live such a tough life
00:24:11but why did i want to kiss him so badly
00:24:18why didn't you come to school today
00:24:21i got into a car accident
00:24:22really? are you okay?
00:24:25you have to keep me in the hospital till prom
00:24:27he was right
00:24:28who? nobody
00:24:29which hospital are you staying at? i want to come visit you
00:24:32no, no you can't
00:24:33i look miserable now
00:24:35you need to see me in style
00:24:37fine, if you say so
00:24:39so
00:24:40are we going to prom together?
00:24:42hell yeah we are
00:24:48why would anyone want to sit next to her?
00:24:51whoever needs a charity case
00:25:08oh
00:25:09you
00:25:10oh
00:25:10me
00:25:11why is she so lucky?
00:25:13cole's never been this way with
00:25:15any other girl
00:25:16people think you're really lucky to be my lab partner
00:25:19i'm sure you feel really lucky to be my lab partner
00:25:21because you don't do any homework
00:25:28you finished it?
00:25:30it's okay
00:25:31we'll get to know each other more
00:25:32i'm not that curious about you actually
00:25:34i'm curious about you though
00:25:36like uh
00:25:37how close were you with your mom?
00:25:40what is he trying to do?
00:25:42it's none of your business
00:25:43but i'm very close with my mom
00:25:45i'd kill anyone who hurts her
00:25:50does colt genuinely want to know me?
00:26:00so
00:26:02are you going to prom?
00:26:03uh
00:26:03i did well
00:26:04i don't know
00:26:06so
00:26:06so you have a date
00:26:08or
00:26:08or
00:26:09shall i say victim?
00:26:10are you jealous of me?
00:26:12me?
00:26:13jealous?
00:26:13no
00:26:14why would i be jealous?
00:26:15oh because i think you so secretly want me
00:26:17you are so
00:26:18full of yourself
00:26:19you can do this on your own
00:26:21yeah
00:26:23no way
00:26:25no way
00:26:26it's a self-locking door
00:26:27really?
00:26:28miss gorman's gonna be back in an hour
00:26:29i'm sure it'll be fine
00:26:30i'm stuck here with you for a full hour?
00:26:33okay
00:26:33sorry
00:26:34am i that bad?
00:26:35i think maybe we can pick up
00:26:37where we left off
00:26:38or
00:26:39maybe trust me and do
00:26:40mm-mm
00:26:41we're keeping our distance this time actually
00:26:43yeah
00:26:54that was my first kiss
00:26:58my first kiss was not supposed to go like that
00:27:00it was supposed to be special at prom
00:27:02and not just bumping lips
00:27:15you're really good at this
00:27:17my dad won't hear regret it
00:27:19you know
00:27:21we can do more if we want
00:27:28anyway
00:27:37i've been wanting back a lot more than you think
00:27:40so you want me
00:27:44i think you know which i want you
00:27:50do you want me?
00:27:52i want you
00:27:58oh shit
00:28:03anyone in here?
00:28:06oh my god
00:28:07how long have you two been in here?
00:28:09i really need to change this lock
00:28:11are you two okay?
00:28:12um
00:28:12yeah
00:28:13yeah we're good
00:28:14we're all good
00:28:15great
00:28:16good job
00:28:17nice
00:28:19thanks
00:28:23you're just gonna pretend like that didn't happen?
00:28:25what didn't happen?
00:28:27hey wait
00:28:27it's just hormones
00:28:29hey jake
00:28:31can you still play after your accident?
00:28:33relax i'm not dead
00:28:34wait
00:28:35car accident?
00:28:36guacamole wizard?
00:28:42i gotta go
00:28:51guacamole wizard?
00:28:53huh?
00:28:56are you all better after your car accident?
00:28:58do i know you?
00:29:00why is he being so standoffish?
00:29:02is he trying to give me a surprise?
00:29:04or he heard something about Cole?
00:29:07you're crushing your soda can
00:29:10she thinks guacamole wizard is jake myers
00:29:12he was in a real car accident
00:29:14according to you so is guacamole wizard
00:29:16i'm not gonna pick this anymore
00:29:18Cole
00:29:18wait
00:29:20oh shit
00:29:25what's up guys?
00:29:27um
00:29:28we were just chatting
00:29:29chatting about jake's grand plans to kick balls?
00:29:33was there something that you wanted Cole?
00:29:36hey!
00:29:37i just figured i'd bring you some mozzarella sticks
00:29:40they're your favorite
00:29:41right?
00:29:44how did you know that?
00:29:46tough day huh?
00:29:47there's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria
00:29:49they're my favorite
00:29:51he couldn't be Cole
00:29:53could he?
00:29:59the truth is um
00:30:00a dickhead?
00:30:03you honestly get out of your bro
00:30:04you came to my table bro
00:30:06and knocked my ball away
00:30:14there it goes again
00:30:15Cole is jealous
00:30:17we got a problem here Cole?
00:30:19we don't have a problem
00:30:20we don't have a problem
00:30:22right?
00:30:23tell Cole to get my ball
00:30:24and we don't have a problem
00:30:26Jake it would take me forever to find one of your balls
00:30:31i have the ball now
00:30:32can we stop measuring each other's dicks?
00:30:36Cole and Jake are fighting over Hayley?
00:30:39maybe i can use that
00:30:43Jake!
00:30:44hey!
00:30:45what if i told you that i have an internship opportunity for you with my dad?
00:30:49wait seriously?
00:30:50yeah!
00:30:51just one little catch
00:30:52you have to pretend to like Hallie Roth
00:30:57alright you have the rest of the period to work on your lab reports
00:31:00if you have any questions i'll be at my desk
00:31:03i thought guacamole wizard would feel more like Cole
00:31:07but if he's really Jake then maybe this was always going to end
00:31:11you've literally been staring for five minutes
00:31:13i'm thinking
00:31:14about the report or about him?
00:31:16why are you making it so weird about Jake?
00:31:18we literally made out of a sword room
00:31:21maybe you've known Jake longer
00:31:22no you don't
00:31:24how do you know that?
00:31:24you're going to prom with someone else
00:31:26stop acting like you're serious about me
00:31:28you have no idea
00:31:34oh my god
00:31:36is Jake asking me to prom?
00:31:51Haley someone's here to see you
00:32:04are you asking me to prom?
00:32:06too cheesy?
00:32:08no it's cute
00:32:11the accident?
00:32:12the mozzarella sticks?
00:32:13he is guacamole wizard
00:32:15so um
00:32:16what do you think?
00:32:18you want to go to prom with me?
00:32:20i...
00:32:21i should feel happy
00:32:22but why does this feel so wrong?
00:32:26hey can we not?
00:32:31hey can we not?
00:32:33dude seriously what is your problem?
00:32:35my problem here dude
00:32:36is that me and my lab partner
00:32:37have work to do
00:32:38and you're out here to strike me
00:32:39with bad puns
00:32:41wow
00:32:42that is some weak shit man
00:32:44oh
00:32:45that's weak shit?
00:32:46is this weak shit?
00:32:50oh my god
00:32:58wow
00:32:59he's got really pretty eyes
00:33:06wait i can't
00:33:07wait i can't
00:33:08colt put me down
00:33:09put me down
00:33:09put me down
00:33:10put me down
00:33:12don't do that again
00:33:26new couple alert
00:33:28fuck off jen
00:33:29why do you hate me so much cool?
00:33:31you and i
00:33:32we're not that different
00:33:33and if you'd realize
00:33:34and give me a chance
00:33:35i think that we would make a great match
00:33:37like
00:33:38say if you asked me
00:33:39to prom
00:33:40i might say yes
00:33:44jen
00:33:44you wanna go to prom
00:33:46with me
00:33:48jen
00:33:49you wanna go to prom
00:33:50with me
00:33:51we're both hot
00:33:52and we're both rich
00:33:53and our dads
00:33:54have been in business
00:33:55like forever
00:33:56so
00:33:56well
00:33:57how romantic
00:33:58i think i'll pass
00:34:01you're gonna regret this
00:34:02Cole Edmonds
00:34:06oh here they come
00:34:08if i message corcomole wizard
00:34:10i wonder if jake's
00:34:11phone will ding
00:34:14what should we wear
00:34:15to prom
00:34:16and a dance list
00:34:26um
00:34:26i'll talk to you later
00:34:27i'll see your own school okay?
00:34:29okay yeah i'll see you later
00:34:29bye
00:34:31he's so different
00:34:32maybe he's still recovering from the accident?
00:34:35i guess they were
00:34:37Hayley?
00:34:42ow
00:34:47jeez
00:34:48god
00:34:54here i'll get it
00:34:55yeah i know
00:35:00oh
00:35:01you're scared of me seeing all the girls in your phone?
00:35:04i don't care
00:35:04i do care
00:35:07here we are
00:35:24don't go to promacheg
00:35:26i mean he only knows you like mozzarella sticks because of me
00:35:29he doesn't even know you
00:35:30and you do?
00:35:31how do you know i like mozzarella sticks?
00:35:34that's something i've only ever talked about
00:35:35because
00:35:36i pay attention to what you like
00:35:39i noticed it at lunch
00:35:41the first day
00:35:43you were watching me?
00:35:45just
00:35:46stop gonna promacheg
00:36:02move
00:36:04colt is talking to Hayley again
00:36:06your job is to keep them away from each other jake
00:36:09unless you don't want that internship that my dad got you
00:36:11obviously i do
00:36:12okay
00:36:13then break them up
00:36:14idiot
00:36:15uh
00:36:16what do i do?
00:36:19i've got a few ideas
00:36:25hey look
00:36:27someone will take you to prom
00:36:29alright i promise
00:36:30yeah? really like who?
00:36:32i mean the whole school hates me except for jake
00:36:35and you but you're not asking me
00:36:39hey
00:36:40hey
00:36:41oh hey jake
00:36:42hey how um
00:36:44i just wanted to thank you again for the other night
00:36:48the other night?
00:36:50yeah it was
00:36:52so
00:36:53sexy
00:36:55you're so sexy
00:36:57jake what are you talking about
00:36:58i hate to break it to you asshole but she's my prom date
00:37:08and she's a real tiger in the pep room
00:37:11oh shit
00:37:13oh shit look at the
00:37:14oh shit
00:37:15oh shit
00:37:22oh shit
00:37:23oh my god
00:37:32Stop! Guys, stop it! Stop! Stop!
00:37:35What the hell is going on over there?
00:37:39Shit, it's Principal Stevens. I've got to save Cole. I mean, Jake. I've got to save Jake.
00:37:50Oh my god! Principal Stevens, I'm so sorry!
00:37:54Hailey Rock, that's detention. After school, don't be late.
00:38:15Cole, what are you doing here?
00:38:17Can we keep you company?
00:38:19It's the least I could do if you saved my rest today.
00:38:24The locker thing, that was an accident.
00:38:26Oh, sure.
00:38:29So, uh, you and Jake, huh?
00:38:34No. He lied about that. I don't know why, though.
00:38:38Good.
00:38:40You know, father that asshole, every time he looks at you, makes me sick to my stomach.
00:38:45Thinking about him touching you, kissing you. I could kill him.
00:38:52Promise me you won't go to prom with it.
00:38:57Okay, fine. I won't.
00:39:02Because I want to go to prom with you.
00:39:06Okay, everyone, let's start off by mixing our sodium bicarbonate.
00:39:17Oh my god, I am so fed up with this.
00:39:22No.
00:39:38Sorry!
00:39:39I tripped.
00:39:40No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:39:42Jet!
00:39:43What?
00:39:43It always has to be about her, doesn't it?
00:39:48They're dead.
00:39:50They're both dead.
00:39:51Oh.
00:39:53How am I going to be able to talk to Guacamole Wizard?
00:39:58Oh.
00:39:59What are you...
00:40:00Are you almost crying?
00:40:02It's probably because you can't afford a new one.
00:40:06Jen!
00:40:06What's going on over there?
00:40:17Wait.
00:40:19What's going on is Jen is getting a taste of her own medicine.
00:40:22This squirm is burning!
00:40:23Mr. Edmonds!
00:40:24Oh, please. It's baking soda and water. You're fine.
00:40:27Detention. Today after school.
00:40:30Shit.
00:40:42Jake, hey.
00:40:43Oh, uh, sorry. Gotta get to student council.
00:40:49Hey, you didn't even try the rice trick.
00:40:52The rice trick?
00:40:55Yeah.
00:40:57You don't know about the...
00:41:00Come on.
00:41:13Hey! Um, Ella.
00:41:16It's Emma.
00:41:18Yeah, that's what I said.
00:41:19Can you hack a broken laptop?
00:41:30Hey, it's gonna be okay.
00:41:32We'll pour out in a few more minutes and it'll be like the whole thing never happened.
00:41:36No, it's not just the phone or the laptop. It means...
00:41:39It means I can't...
00:41:41Can't what?
00:41:45I talked to a friend online.
00:41:48He's really important to me.
00:41:52And I'm sure you're really important to him.
00:42:05You know, Cole, if you look past all that hair gel and...
00:42:10Big ol' ego and...
00:42:12Okay, okay. I-I get it.
00:42:18You're kinda sweet.
00:42:23Hey, look at that.
00:42:26Oh my god.
00:42:27I can't...
00:42:29Oh my god.
00:42:31You're a miracle worker.
00:42:38Ugh, what is taking so long?
00:42:39You doused this thing in sodium bicarbonate.
00:42:42Shut up, Ella.
00:42:43It's Emma.
00:42:44Whatever.
00:42:50This is...
00:42:51Oh my god.
00:42:59Oh, morning, valley whore!
00:43:02How are things in the castle?
00:43:09Valley whore?
00:43:10What are they talking about?
00:43:26Guacamole wizard, when can we be together in person?
00:43:30Guacamole wizard, I want you so badly, I dream about you touching me.
00:43:34Oh my god, someone hacked my castle claimers messages.
00:43:37Touch me, guacamole wizard.
00:43:40Yeah.
00:43:41Hey, valley whore.
00:43:42Show him what you really like.
00:43:43Oh my god.
00:44:01Here you go.
00:44:03Here, this is for you.
00:44:08Oh, do you like what I've done with the place?
00:44:11You hacked my laptop?
00:44:13Oh no, it wasn't me.
00:44:15It was that kid, Ella.
00:44:16But I definitely gotta reap the benefits.
00:44:18What kind of incel sex over a video game, Hayley?
00:44:22What are you, catfishing this guy?
00:44:23No, I'm not trying to catfish him.
00:44:25Hey everyone, I think valley whore's a catfish.
00:44:29Because who in their right mind would spend their time thirsting over you?
00:44:58Stop it, stop!
00:44:59Stop!
00:45:02I thought I'd send the janitor some time.
00:45:08Jake!
00:45:09Hey!
00:45:11Now's the time.
00:45:13Tell them.
00:45:14Tell them what?
00:45:15That you're guacamole wizard.
00:45:18Who's guacamole wizard?
00:45:21Here you go.
00:45:24Oh my god.
00:45:26Did you think that Jake was your secret little online boyfriend?
00:45:29Oh, sweetie.
00:45:30I've been bribing him this whole time to pretend to like you.
00:45:33What?
00:45:34Why would you do that?
00:45:35Oh, I don't know, Cole.
00:45:36Why do you think I would do that?
00:45:39Jake, is this true?
00:45:41Have you been pretending to like me this whole time?
00:45:45Sorry.
00:45:46It was nothing personal.
00:45:53Yeah, nothing personal.
00:45:55Oh!
00:45:57Oh!
00:45:59Oh!
00:46:01Alright, alright, alright.
00:46:03Enough!
00:46:04What in the world is going on here?
00:46:06Is that a leaf blower?
00:46:08That's all him.
00:46:09Okay, well you both have detention, so...
00:46:16Let me get this straight.
00:46:17You stole a leaf blower and defaced school property.
00:46:21It wasn't school property, Dad.
00:46:23It was Jen's cyber boy's spreadsheets.
00:46:25Jesus Christ, how does she always get away with this shit?
00:46:28Could it be because her father's running for Senate, Cole?
00:46:31You think that's what it could be?
00:46:32Who cares?
00:46:33I care.
00:46:35And I hear she's got an eye for you.
00:46:38So you're taking her to prom.
00:46:39What?
00:46:40Over my dead body?
00:46:42Oh, because you're like that Haley girl?
00:46:45I'm firing her mother right now.
00:46:46No, no, please don't.
00:46:48Please.
00:46:49Then you're taking Jen to prom.
00:46:51Max's dad called.
00:46:52He said he's having a party tomorrow.
00:46:54You're gonna go.
00:46:55And you're gonna ask Jen to prom.
00:46:57End of discussion.
00:47:05Come on, you big coward.
00:47:06Message him.
00:47:08Just do it, just do it.
00:47:11You must think I'm the biggest idiot.
00:47:20I could never think that.
00:47:27But I thought you were Jake.
00:47:29Please, can't you just tell me now?
00:47:30I think I've had enough public humiliation for one lifetime.
00:47:37I heard that guy Max is throwing a party tomorrow.
00:47:40If you want, I'll meet you there.
00:47:53Okay.
00:47:54You got this, Haley.
00:47:56Just take a deep breath.
00:47:57You got this.
00:47:58You got this.
00:48:02You look beautiful.
00:48:06Thank you, Mom.
00:48:26Hey, Haley.
00:48:27I'm glad you came.
00:48:28You look so pretty.
00:48:30Hi.
00:48:31Hey, Max.
00:48:32Your house is gorgeous.
00:48:33I mean...
00:48:34No, it's just my parents' blood, honey.
00:48:36You know they're upstairs watching The Last of Us right now?
00:48:38They don't care about shit.
00:48:39Get drunk, girl.
00:48:40Woo!
00:48:43Get up.
00:48:54What are you doing here?
00:48:56Valley whore?
00:48:58Looks like the catfish came out of the pond.
00:49:01Hey, everyone.
00:49:02Let's give it up for Valley whore.
00:49:03Valley whore!
00:49:08Jen, why are you doing this?
00:49:10What have I even done to you?
00:49:11To me?
00:49:12Oh, I'm actually concerned about our whole community
00:49:14because those little cringy messages on your castle game,
00:49:18those are concerning.
00:49:19Actually, I kind of look a bit of a perv.
00:49:21Did you know that, Haley?
00:49:24She's a little pervy princess.
00:49:26Pervy princess!
00:49:28Pervy princess!
00:49:30Pervy princess!
00:49:32Pervy princess!
00:49:33Pervy princess!
00:49:34Pervy princess!
00:49:35Hey, let's get pervy tonight.
00:49:37Leave me alone.
00:49:39Is there a fire?
00:49:41Okay, we set off the alarm.
00:49:55Paul?
00:50:06Please see if you can.
00:50:16So, we'll attack.
00:50:17We'll attack.
00:50:19We'll attack.
00:50:21Oh, myr.
00:50:22It's, you know.
00:50:24Oh, myr.
00:50:26Bye.
00:50:26I'm ready.
00:50:33are you him would you stop trying to find your stupid little cyber boyfriend okay Cole is not
00:50:40him anyways we are going to the prom together no I'm not yes you are it's okay you can be
00:50:48honest about your feelings so you too this whole time oh my god I am such an idiot hey wait
00:51:05please at least take my jackets you know if you really wanted to humiliate me you didn't have to
00:51:10go to the extra effort Jen was doing just fine I wasn't trying to humiliate you then what were
00:51:14you trying to do I guess you obviously the what clothes were just an added bonus I knew I
00:51:20shouldn't trusted you now what about guacamole wizard what are you who is that just the devil get in the
00:51:40car I'm not gonna ask you again Cole get in the car thank you just act normal for once and
00:51:48please
00:51:48introduce yourself to Haley I already assumed that's who this was hi Mr. Evans so you're the
00:51:56scholarship trash that's hell-bent on ruining Cole's life well I've got news for you young lady my son
00:52:03is gonna marry a good girl from a respectable family and that's not you you will be forgotten
00:52:10you're a maid's daughter and your mom works for me stay away from him or I swear to God your
00:52:18mother
00:52:18is fire dad stop don't you touch my family I'll stay away come on you don't mean that
00:52:29I hate everything you stand for I hate your greed and your callousness and your elitist ideas of what
00:52:36you think a good person looks like I hate everything about you I hate all of it I don't want
00:52:42any part
00:52:43of it so cool go with your dad Haley no laptop and no phone for a week ever since mom
00:53:01died you've
00:53:02turned into this cold patriarch Haley not that's real love why do you have to make me so miserable
00:53:06I promised your mother I would make you a success son even if it meant saving you from yourself
00:53:20hi Haley I'm Emma I know you are right I just felt kind of bad that I accidentally helped
00:53:28and ruin your life so I wanted to return your laptop to you goodness new
00:53:37oh wow thanks Emma okay bye
00:53:46one down one to go you're so cool I know Emma want to go to prom why not let's get
00:53:56these lovers together
00:54:02hi Mr. Edmunds hi Max and Max's friend sorry we weren't expecting you Cole's grounded oh he is
00:54:11but it was his 18th birthday today what can I say Max actions have consequences birthday or no Cole
00:54:19is grounded well that really sucks because he is also the president of the prom committee we were
00:54:26supposed to review budgets today Cole my son Cole reviewing budgets he's never reviewed a budget a day
00:54:35in his life well Mr. Edmunds today could be that day and we just have to give him back this
00:54:39school
00:54:39sanctioned laptop so we can get back to his very important and very respectable budgetary work
00:54:53go away
00:54:57Max what what are you guys doing here happy birthday Cole I brought you my laptop and logged into your
00:55:04castle claimers account just get it back to me by tomorrow what what's going on dude it's your 18th
00:55:09birthday you could tell Haley who you are now you can be together just log into this stupid game
00:55:15and tell the girl who you love you really are no I'll tell her myself stick me in your car
00:55:32mom I'm fine I just need some time alone
00:55:43open the door wait what he's here
00:55:55it's you
00:55:57I should have given you this to you a long time ago
00:56:01anyway I wanted to tell you who I was from the very beginning
00:56:04my dad threatened to follow your mom and I had to wait a really long time to tell you who
00:56:09I was
00:56:09I got my inheritance and I can protect you and your family and so you don't have to choose
00:56:28I understand if this changes things if you don't love me the way you love guacamole wizard but
00:56:37I need you to know I love you
00:56:50I love you
00:56:52you do
00:56:54yes you idiot
00:56:56I've loved you for months I mean this whole guacamole wizard thing was so confusing though
00:57:01you know because I had to be loyal to him and but you're him
00:57:06you didn't expect her
00:57:08I mean I always hoped it was you
00:57:13until you hoped it
00:57:16yes I hoped it was you you were always there for me
00:57:22you're hurt me
00:57:24you're really fucking hurt
00:57:29hey uh
00:57:31one of those things I said we could do
00:57:34you ever go
00:57:39take my clothes out
00:57:40yeah no don't worry
00:58:04okay so what do you think
00:58:0710 out of 10
00:58:08no yeah would do again
00:58:11I'll get sex for sex with me specifically
00:58:13I've only ever had sex with you specifically
00:58:16all right all right that's fair
00:58:18I'll uh I'll take that as a one
00:58:25what is my life now
00:58:27am I being nice to Cole Edmonds
00:58:30oh god no I fully expect you to continue to berate me endlessly
00:58:35no I'll just I'll just lust behind it
00:58:38there's always been lust behind it
00:58:40I'll see you in a minute now
00:58:42stop it
00:58:45um
00:58:46say
00:58:48isn't promenade
00:58:50I think you know if it's promenade
00:58:52okay
00:58:54but the real question is
00:58:56do you got a date
00:58:59Cole are you asking me to prom
00:59:01I would have asked you earlier
00:59:03but Jay kind of gave me to the gym
00:59:05oh god please don't mention his name again
00:59:07I don't want to hear it
00:59:08yeah you don't have to ask me once
00:59:10but I don't even have a dress
00:59:13wait here
00:59:18I just slept with Cole Edmonds
00:59:20and I'm in love with Cole Edmonds
00:59:21who would have guessed
00:59:26I thought
00:59:28only the best for my princess
00:59:30where did you get that
00:59:32uh
00:59:33I might have gotten you a dress
00:59:35on the off chance that you
00:59:38might have wanted to go to prom with me
00:59:39and maybe had nothing to wear
00:59:43of course I'll go to prom with you
00:59:49Mr. Edmonds
00:59:50I didn't expect you to be here
00:59:53Cole
00:59:53are you here
00:59:56Cole
00:59:56are you here
00:59:59Mr. Edmonds
01:00:00you can't just park into my house like this
01:00:02I see you Cole
01:00:03you are in big trouble
01:00:21hey uh
01:00:22you almost done in there
01:00:23you try changing into an evening gown
01:00:26in a bunch of thorny bushes
01:00:29okay I'm ready
01:00:41what do you think
01:00:46my god Haley
01:00:47you are the most beautiful thing
01:00:49I have ever seen
01:00:52uh uh uh
01:00:53I just hunched over in a car mirror
01:00:55to do this lipstick
01:00:56you're not messing it up
01:00:56for at least 20 minutes
01:00:5920 more minutes
01:01:00we're in
01:01:01I do
01:01:05thank you all for using the prom voting site to cast your votes
01:01:09I hear we have a winner
01:01:13and your 2026 prom queen is
01:01:18Jen Longfellow
01:01:20thank you
01:01:21oh my god
01:01:24thank you guys so much
01:01:26seriously this makes the world to me
01:01:28I mean like
01:01:29who else would win
01:01:30right
01:01:31oh this is just the perfect moment
01:01:38oh my god
01:01:39that's Haley and Cole
01:01:41it was fun
01:01:43this is great
01:01:43you got this
01:01:48there uh
01:01:49most 10 minutes up
01:01:51no
01:01:51but who cares
01:01:55hell yeah
01:01:59ew literally what the fuck
01:02:01hell yeah
01:02:02language
01:02:02I am the queen okay
01:02:04she's just a little
01:02:05pervy princess
01:02:06come on
01:02:07everyone say it with me
01:02:08pervy princess
01:02:10pervy princess
01:02:11pervy princess
01:02:18wait wait wait wait what are those those are texts between me and my dad
01:02:21make Cole Edmonds fall in love with you
01:02:25his dad's month is essential to funding my campaign
01:02:29don't worry daddy if I can't have no one can
01:02:33I'm gonna destroy Haley Roth's life is this real
01:02:37Jen's crazy
01:02:41who did this
01:02:43who did this
01:02:46what
01:02:47you exploited me for a hacking job and didn't think I was gonna hack your phone
01:02:50you little shit
01:02:53you know Jen as the principal I'm supposed to remain impartial and above all of this petty drama
01:03:01but quite frankly you are the worst and I think it's time that you are expelled from Edmonds Academy
01:03:10you can't do that
01:03:11I'm the principal so yes I can
01:03:22there was no internship
01:03:25you lied to me
01:03:33Hayley catch
01:03:38my princess finally has her crown
01:03:43now all I need is my handsome prince
01:03:45oh
01:03:46yeah no can do
01:03:47all I have to offer
01:03:49is a bowie knight with a chip on his shoulder
01:03:52and a awesome sense of humor
01:03:54oof
01:03:54how can I refuse
01:04:01oh no that's my dad
01:04:06we are going home
01:04:07right now
01:04:09you disobeyed me for the last time boy
01:04:11yeah I'm not a boy dad
01:04:14you talk all the time
01:04:15about wanting a man that's worthy of the family last name
01:04:18yet you can't see I've already become that man
01:04:22and it's because of Hayley
01:04:23and you can accept that
01:04:25or I'll make my own path
01:04:26and best believe me I can
01:04:29I'll say this
01:04:31it's the most backbone I've ever seen in you Cole
01:04:36joy prime
01:04:44I am so proud of you
01:04:47I kind of done with all you being by my side
01:04:50that was terrifying
01:04:52it's not like we haven't slayed a dragon before
01:04:55well so
01:04:56I love you Bella Queen
01:04:58I love you guacamole wizard
01:05:00oh my god I gotta change that username
01:05:02yeah you do
01:05:03yeah
01:05:04oh my god I'm so proud of you
01:05:04I'm so proud of you
01:05:05I'm so proud of you
01:05:05I'm so proud of you
01:05:07I'm so proud of you
01:05:07I'm so proud of you
01:05:07I'm so proud of you
01:05:08I'm so proud of you
01:05:08I'm so proud of you
01:05:09I'm so proud of you
01:05:10I'm so proud of you
01:05:10I'm so proud of you
01:05:11I'm so proud of you
01:05:12I'm so proud of you
01:05:12I'm so proud of you
01:05:14I'm so proud of you
01:05:17I'm so proud of you
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