00:23Any idea where Egyptians deposit their money, Sherman?
00:26Sure, the banks of the Nile.
00:27Oh, well, I guess they do.
00:29At any rate, that's where we're going today.
00:31Where?
00:31To the banks of the Nile.
00:32To deposit money?
00:33No, to meet Egypt's most famous and beautiful queen, Cleopatra.
00:36I instruct the German to set the way back in trouble for the year 42 B.C.
00:40And the place, Cleopatra's royal palace.
00:42Unfortunately, when we arrived, we found the queen and the men stopped having a shave.
00:46Hokey smokes!
00:47I didn't know she had a beard.
00:48She didn't.
00:49This was her evil brother, Prince Ptolemy.
00:51Oh, boy, now that I'm the ruler of Egypt, I'm really going to liven things up around here.
00:55Excuse us, your royal Ptolemy, sir, but where's Cleopatra?
00:58Floating down the Nile on a raft, and in about two seconds, the crocodiles should have her.
01:04You can be sure we hasten to the rescue.
01:06There she is, Mr. Peabody.
01:07And look, there are crocodiles all around her.
01:09Well, Nile crocodiles, as everyone knows, are frustrated actors.
01:12This gave us a plausible reason for putting on an impromptu performance of Uncle Tom's Cabin.
01:16I'll get you, Little Eva.
01:17You won't get away from me.
01:18Oh, no, you won't, you nasty Uncle Tom.
01:20I shall cross yonder ice flows and escape from you.
01:23Well, the crocs, as I knew they would, pretended they were blocks of ice and gave a sterling performance.
01:28Sherman, or Little Eva, dashed out across them with myself or Uncle Tom in warm pursuit.
01:32By the time we reached the far shore, we had not only picked up some new members for the Screen
01:35Actors Guild, but Cleopatra as well.
01:37Thank you, Little Doggy, for rescuing me.
01:40I am not a Little Doggy, Your Highness.
01:42I am Mr. Peabody.
01:43And I'm Sherman.
01:43How come you're not marching to the sea?
01:46That was General Sherman, madam.
01:48This one is only a second lieutenant.
01:50Suddenly the air was filled with a layer of trumpets.
01:52Moving over a small hill, we saw the valley below was filled with a huge army.
01:56Wow, whose army is that?
01:58Caesars.
01:58Sid Caesars.
01:59Julius Caesars.
02:01Say, I'll bet he'd help Cleopatra get her throne back.
02:03He would if he became infatuated.
02:05You think you could charm the great Caesar into assisting your cause, Cleopatra?
02:08Are you kidding?
02:09Cleopatra began her saturation campaign by entering Caesar's tent during his two o'clock feeding.
02:14Osgrot, you're artists.
02:15This is the vilest Caesar salad I've ever tasted.
02:18Who's got the salt?
02:20Here it is, Julie, baby.
02:22You want some pepper, too?
02:25At four o'clock, Caesar reviewed his troops.
02:28You, soldier, you know better than to hold a dirty spear.
02:30I am sorry, oh, Caesar, but I had nothing to clean it with.
02:33Clean it with mint.
02:34Spearmint?
02:35Thrust that man and you, soldier.
02:38Hello, Julie, honey.
02:40Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
02:42Crown and blow came when the great man dictated a letter that was to be sent back to Rome.
02:45And I shall return during the Ides of March.
02:48Is that all, sir?
02:49That is all sign of yours, sincerely, Julie, baby.
02:52Julie, baby?
02:53Oh, I must be going mad.
02:54Leave me.
02:55I seem to be haunted by the voice and face of a beguiling vixen.
02:59Perhaps I have a virus.
03:01You look good to me, Julie Tiger.
03:03Even the mirror looks like her.
03:05By morning, Julius Caesar was on the verge of an unnervous breakdown, and that's when
03:09Cleopatra, escorted by two Egyptian guards, who resembled a boy and a dog, had it out
03:13with him.
03:13You're devastatingly beautiful, you minx, you.
03:17Say you'll go steady with me.
03:18She will if you'll attack Ptolemy and kick him off the throne.
03:21Caesar, of course, would do anything, so that afternoon, he and his vast legions lined
03:25up in front of Egypt's royal palace.
03:26Spear throwers, attack!
03:28A thousand deadly spears were launched in the direction of the palace wall, but Ptolemy
03:32was a clever man, for suddenly a huge screen popped up, a screen that had been coated
03:36with rubber.
03:36The spears nearly hit the screen and returned from whence they came.
03:41Boulders were even catapulted, but they, too, bounced back.
03:45If this keeps up, we'll be victorious losers.
03:48Do something, Mr. Peabody!
03:49And I did.
03:50First of all, I covered myself with bandages.
03:52To the enemy, I would appear to be a dog mummy, which was sacred to the Egyptians in
03:56those days, as everyone knows.
03:57Then I left the Roman lines and ran as best I could to the palace wall.
04:01A mighty leap, and I was over.
04:04One hour later, I returned to Sherman, Caesar, and Cleopatra.
04:07You may renew the assault, Julius.
04:09But what good will it do?
04:10I insisted he follow my orders.
04:12A bad arse of boulders was again sent flying at the walls, and again the rubber screen popped
04:16up.
04:16Only this time, there was a gaping hole in it, courtesy of yours truly.
04:20The rocks roared through the aperture, and inside of ten minutes, the walls came a-tumbling
04:24down and following with them.
04:26Cleopatra had her throne, and Caesar had Cleopatra.
04:29As for Sherman and me, we had ourselves a short sightseeing tour of the marketplace in Cairo.
04:34Step right up, folks.
04:35Buy yourself a genuine Egyptian pharaoh barometer.
04:38Take a barometer home to the little woman.
04:40Look at that, Mr. Peabody.
04:41That man is selling barometers shaped like pharaohs.
04:43Yes, they not only sold slaves in Egypt, they sold barometers as well.
04:47I never knew they could forecast the weather.
04:49You never heard of pharaoh and warmer?
04:52When they were told, they were constantly throwing off because of the wall with the nail, where
04:57they could forecast the fact that they killedazuje, but they were Treasury, of course.
04:57I have a bit of a-toulder antibiotic, but there was one of those who story mice
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