- 10 hours ago
- #bait
#Bait S01E03 [Full Movie] [Full Story]Full EP - Full
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:24Packing.
00:42I hear that. I really do. It's just really not a good day to me because it's Eid, so I've
00:46got to stick with family.
00:46Okay. Well, you could have stuck with the family yesterday, but now you've got to deal with the shitstorm you
00:50created.
00:50Is it really that bad? A lot of people seem to like the whole action and ritual.
00:55I reckon it will help them visualize me as Bond.
00:57Oh, okay. Well, there is a lot of chatter. Some people think you're a tough guy. Other people think you're
01:00insane.
01:01This could cost you the role. Oh, fuck.
01:06Saju, what happened to you once again?
01:09Mommy, have you met Felicia?
01:10This is the team.
01:11Oh, this is your agent.
01:16Remember I said wait in the car and I'm going to get the sweetest.
01:19Don't give me a ticket because Felicia, what's going on?
01:23Same as you, just babysitting Bond.
01:25Oh, that horny auntie's waiting for you.
01:27You're a disgrace.
01:28Felicia, you're going to get him the job, yes.
01:31If it kills me.
01:33My Shahjee's just perfect for the job. I'll tell you why.
01:35Okay.
01:35When he was a little boy, he used to say,
01:37Mama, I want a license to kill. Remember, Shahjee?
01:41Oh, how specific?
01:42I don't remember that.
01:43Oh, look, he's got the military.
01:46I'll just be a minute, okay?
01:47Bye-bye, Felicia.
01:48Bye, Felicia.
01:54I'm sorry. You are a black lady.
01:58I know.
02:01What the fuck is this?
02:03You told me.
02:10Oh, you know what? I can't get into this right now.
02:12Okay, listen, none of this matters, okay?
02:15No one reads the fucking news.
02:17However, this is a big problem.
02:20The person you assaulted, you broke his arm,
02:22and now he wants an apology.
02:24Sid said he was going for the giant Buddha's head,
02:26but now he's coming for you with 200,000 followers
02:29and counting young and brown your core fan base.
02:32Assaulted?
02:33This man ran at me with a metal object, Felicia.
02:36It was a can of spray paint, Shahjee.
02:38Yeah, in hindsight.
02:39I mean, the worst he could have done was tag you.
02:41Okay, fine. Just give him his apology.
02:42Okay, good.
02:43All right, so how are you going to do?
02:44Oh, no, you have to apologize.
02:47On a video by end of day, or he's pressing charges.
02:49Listen, it's Ian, so I've got to stick with the family.
02:52My mum usually hosts, but I fucked that up this time.
02:54That's on me.
02:55So I can't be dealing with this.
02:56I have to be with the fan today.
02:58I have to make it right.
02:58This is about your career, Shah.
03:00Your credibility in your community
03:02for the people that you say you're doing all of this for.
03:05Do you want more followers of me?
03:10Shah!
03:12Shah Latif here.
03:14Eve Mubarak to everyone celebrating.
03:15I want to address the incident at the King's Museum last night.
03:19You might have heard about it or seen it.
03:21Well, I lived it.
03:23And I want you to know that in that moment,
03:24I wasn't thinking at all.
03:26I was acting out of sheer instinct.
03:30Community is the most important thing in the world to me.
03:33And I would never take it for granted.
03:36And there's nothing more painful to me
03:38than to know that I might have hurt a member of my own community.
03:41and to know that I might have betrayed your trust in some way
03:44hurts me deeply.
03:46You good, yeah?
03:47Yeah, I'm good.
03:50So you've come to visit us lowly villagers.
03:55Oxford educated.
03:56But no sense.
03:58Why did you attack that young man?
03:59Don't listen to him.
04:01Come.
04:01Let's take a selfie.
04:03And I want you to know
04:04that I'm going to do everything in my power
04:06to make up for it
04:07and to make it rightful.
04:09Right?
04:10Should have won black.
04:12Hmm?
04:13It would go better with the animal bitches' gold palace.
04:17Hmm?
04:18Eve is my day.
04:19It belongs to all Muslims.
04:21Mummy.
04:21It's mine.
04:22And she took it.
04:23Oh.
04:23You know one thing she doesn't have?
04:25What?
04:27Hassan.
04:29Salim.
04:30You golden boy.
04:31I stood to buy a big shot.
04:33Always trying to compete with you.
04:35Bad shot.
04:36Probably getting a Russian prostitute pregnant this second.
04:38Don't talk filthy.
04:42Orbita?
04:44She doesn't have her main attraction.
04:46You and me can be the stars of the show.
04:48We just...
04:50Come on.
04:51You worried about what Naughty Naila thinks?
04:53Mangi Naila.
04:54Mangi Naila.
04:55Oh, my God.
04:56Thank you, Naila.
04:57And she always shows skin because she's got no style.
05:01Look, where is she?
05:01She's probably too busy checking herself out in the mirror
05:04to come host her own party.
05:05Eve is my body.
05:06Oh, you're such a beautiful woman.
05:09Thank you so much for having me.
05:15Mmm.
05:19Samina?
05:20Eve is my body.
05:23I'm so happy you could come.
05:25So we've decided to co-host this year.
05:27His brother, you've done a great job, Tahira.
05:30But you know Naughty Naila, how is she?
05:32She doesn't manage her.
05:33She doesn't have to do anything.
05:34I'm not going to do decoration.
05:35I'm going to put her in the penthouse.
05:36I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
05:38I'm sorry.
05:38I'm sorry.
05:39The Quran says charity is a blessing.
05:41In the garden, please eat them.
05:43Eve is my body.
05:45Eve is my body.
05:51Eve is my body.
05:59What the fuck?
06:03Don't leave my side.
06:04Now he has passed, you are the eldest.
06:06No, thank you. I am fine standing.
06:09Baba, go you a favor. Don't tell mommy, yeah?
06:12Is that how you are going to kill us, Bond?
06:13By raising the blood sugar?
06:16Yeah, I'll mention that to the writers.
06:19I'm letting go.
06:22Maybe, yeah, maybe.
06:23Why don't you do a Pakistani film?
06:24Something with Mehra Khan in it.
06:26No, no, Urdu is also called Goro Vidra.
06:34Hey, I'm here as fuck right now.
06:41Sure, good first try, good first try,
06:46but I'm going to need you to do another apology video.
06:49First, you forgot to say the words, I'm sorry,
06:51which is kind of key to the whole thing.
06:53He's buff, no?
06:55Kitty says he's gone mental.
06:56Yeah, it's fucking hot.
06:58Sorry, can you man focus, please?
07:00This is the latest.
07:02Sir, it's the guy who likes you.
07:04Hmm.
07:07Also, the whole Aladdin outfit and the Bollywood sweet shop,
07:11it's their community like ten times.
07:13It feels like you're begging it.
07:14Maybe down the brow.
07:16I don't get it, what is the problem?
07:18I like you.
07:18It's hot, man, I'm 22, mate.
07:21What were you trying to get wife'd off?
07:22Get it to me sooner rather than later.
07:25This is not going away.
07:27Hi, everyone, Shah Latif here.
07:29Now, last night at the King's Museum,
07:31a brother and I came into conflict.
07:34Now, I should not have reacted the way that I did.
07:37And the brother in question, perhaps,
07:39should not have run at me with a metal object
07:42the way that he did.
07:44Nuba is a community-led.
07:46It's not fucking community-led.
07:48The fact is, we're all in this together.
07:50And in the future, I promise to use my platform
07:52not to lash out, but to reach out.
07:57Bro.
07:57Nuba is for...
07:59Yeah.
08:00You want some chai or something?
08:02No.
08:03Nuba.
08:04Bro, we good?
08:05I'm good, are you good?
08:06Yeah, I'm good, bro, we good.
08:07I'm good, are you good?
08:09Yeah, I'm good.
08:09I'm good, then.
08:11Nuba, not Nuba.
08:12What are you doing?
08:12I'm trying to focus, man.
08:13You are distracting me.
08:15Alright.
08:15Nuba?
08:16Yes.
08:17Yo, they've got them little laddus over there
08:18with the pink and green balls on them.
08:19You want them?
08:20Big man, please.
08:21I don't want laddus right now, okay?
08:22I just want to concentrate.
08:24Aren't you supposed to be holding Ammi's hand?
08:26Oh, yeah.
08:27Shit.
08:28In a bit, yeah?
08:29Don't bring me no laddus.
08:30Before that, you know...
08:32Near the bit.
08:35Hey.
08:38Here I go.
08:39It's only gone.
08:39It's only gone.
08:40Where have you been?
08:41I've just been checking on Baba and Zofi.
08:44Bastard, you promised you're not going to leave me.
08:46So if I just die standing here alone...
08:49Please don't do this now.
08:50You left me.
08:51I'm sorry.
08:52I'll make it up to you.
08:53My name!
08:54My Salim is coming!
09:00Salim!
09:01My son!
09:05Salim!
09:10Salim!
09:29Oh, Peter!
09:32Peter!
09:34Look, Mr. Dubai.
09:36I'm feeling like I am.
09:37Look at him, the dancing monkey, doing his mother's dirty bidding,
09:41making russian prostitutes pregnant look no he's not mommy that was a joke that i just made
09:47oh look at that fresh spray zulfi weakest of us all
09:54don't leave she's coming don't leave can i borrow your money for a minute i need my
09:59co-host in the kitchen okay we're just gonna okay okay no no let's go let's go let's go let's
10:08go
10:08our kpi is the most interesting thing about this okay it's the retention of the customer base
10:12after that discount period you know it's off the charts people want more community driven ride
10:16share options yes salim yes what are you saying bro yes look at this guy you good yeah come join
10:23us
10:23man join us i was good doing that anyway yeah i got you some loaders bro thank you thank you
10:27yeah that's why i never got your number how you been i've been good bro yeah you've been breaking
10:31shit what do you mean by that glass ceilings thank you try it man trying and i got his arm
10:40it's just a fracture hey just to bring this back to what we're talking about before you got here
10:44yeah um you know our number of drivers are growing by the day we'll be in all key five bars
10:49by june so
10:50moobah sick idea innit i've been there from day one i remember bro i'm so proud of this guy
10:54customer is so proud and you know what's amazing he's always been an entrepreneur
10:57if anything he just went from selling grams to instagram
11:05just out of interest what was the what's your credit situation with the criminal record and
11:09everything no no problems whatsoever no issues and just for clarity um i didn't go inside for
11:15selling mall it's not just five bit of island disorder it was your self-defense it was really
11:19beautiful in a way he's a ride or die and he was there for me any credit issues though no
11:23credit
11:23issues because i'm going all in with everything that i've got right so if you need any credit you
11:28need financing just talk to me sorry just i was done the impression we were coming in seed round
11:32rather than source series a see this conversation here this is in fact the closest he's been to the
11:39business right and in fact it's too close okay give me back my dildos then
11:47uh even for me personally the most important quality about muba is in fact the quality of the
11:53relationships we're not just there for them when we want because that's bullshit that's fake
12:00get the off me bro i don't know
12:05and anyway i've always had a passion for customer services it's my thing that's one thing i picked up
12:09in dubai that's what we do best hospitality that's our culture one might say like the muslim way of
12:15doing business i love the idea i'm gonna present it to the guys see what they say well you're taking
12:20this you're trying to get investment from dubai yeah okay yeah you've been no no i'm just saying
12:30you know dubai works for people with you know all like with the but i mean what the fuck's this
12:34guy
12:34gonna do in dubai man he's gonna let you in bro you don't want to go there man i'm all
12:38in yeah remember
12:43he was disrespectful he referred to your quiff like that there was no need
12:46they lose good sure got your second apology yeah that's not gonna work first of all what was up
12:53with that background if you post that you'll have to issue a second apology for being a rich
12:58asshole also you forgot to say sorry again what the first class in tazam kia naila
13:07next year is back at yours no no absolutely yes very kind of you to step in this year
13:20my life just because uh i worry for him for all of you it's so much pressure that's
13:32very kind of you to worry and i see a bit of your sister in him
13:44does cha cha have someone you can talk to he has me look i had you too but she needed
13:50more help
13:51no but but she doesn't know anything she was i love please it's all good my son is going to
13:59be the
14:00next james bond we all couldn't be more proud it's okay to talk about these struggles now really
14:12thank you thank you it's all good it's first class
15:01this is
15:04I'm lucky.
15:07It's stupid.
15:12Shah, we need that apology.
15:14We're running out of time.
15:15I've literally written it out for you.
15:17Just find a quiet, neutral room.
15:20Record it and send it back now
15:21before it's too fucking late, okay?
15:47Am I interacting, Sammy?
15:50Yeah.
15:51A conversation.
15:54Can you fucking close the door, please?
15:57Is this like you two...
15:59I like her.
16:00Texting.
16:01Wow.
16:02So how long has this been going on?
16:03Three months.
16:03Six months.
16:04Three months?
16:06Okay, so this is nothing.
16:07Can we please not do this in front of Shah?
16:09I'm chill.
16:10I'm not going to tell anyone.
16:10Why don't I come here?
16:11Can we not do this in front of Shah?
16:12I came here for you.
16:13But I never asked you to, did I?
16:15But I asked me to.
16:16I never...
16:16Calm down.
16:17I never fucking asked you to.
16:19And this, this whole thing you're doing here,
16:20this is what I'm talking about.
16:21This is the whole problem.
16:21So just to clarify,
16:22you didn't come in to see Zilfie then for the thing?
16:24No.
16:25Yes.
16:25Does he know, by the way?
16:26Oh, fuck's sake.
16:27He's going to find out now, isn't he?
16:29I'm not going to say anything.
16:30I've got your back.
16:30I've got your back.
16:32Look, we don't have to tell anyone,
16:34but let's just be real about what this is,
16:36because this is, this is something, right?
16:38Me and you both know it.
16:39What does that even mean, bro?
16:41You, you live a million miles away, okay?
16:44You have a whole life.
16:45You have fucking house keys, car keys,
16:48so, so many keys, okay?
16:49I have one key.
16:50I can give you keys.
16:51I don't want your keys, okay?
16:53I want mine.
16:54Yo, can I just step in here for a minute,
16:55offer maybe a different perspective
16:56from my own more mature experience, yeah?
16:59I want an honest answer from both of you, okay?
17:03Alright?
17:03Alright.
17:04Now, let's say,
17:05let's say you've been texting.
17:06There's some emotional ambiguity
17:09about where you both stand.
17:11Alright?
17:12Yeah?
17:12You can relate, right?
17:13You send a message, a heartfelt one.
17:16Instead of it going green, it goes grey.
17:20What does that mean to you?
17:21It means you're blocked.
17:23Blocked.
17:24Fuck off, really.
17:25Yeah.
17:27Let me just show you this.
17:28Okay, I'm gonna ask you to leave now.
17:29Can I show you this quickly?
17:30No, no, no.
17:30Oi.
17:31Don't say anything to anyone.
17:33I'm chill.
17:36Selim, yeah.
17:40He's not fucking chill.
17:48With Saigon, who will lead the prayer?
17:50Pasha?
17:51Okay.
17:52Well, he resides beautifully, but I think I should lead.
17:56How will you?
17:57Seated?
17:57I won't be seated.
17:58Where's by?
17:59Think about it.
17:59Let someone else lead.
18:01Listen, you asswipes.
18:03I can run circles around you idiots.
18:04I will lead.
18:06I will lead.
18:13By so desperately pursuing the role of Bond, an icon of the white establishment, Shah Latifah's exchanging his political art
18:20for vanilla distraction.
18:21And so he joins a long line of brown men who think that by becoming our oppressor, he's somehow liberating
18:27all of us.
18:28And he puts a filter on his IMDB pic to look more white.
18:30Come on.
18:32Come on.
18:41Come on.
18:43Come on.
19:03Come on.
19:03I can't believe you.
19:04Fucking thing.
19:06Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.
19:10Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.
19:32Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.
19:38Oh
19:38Some young whoa, Lee, man, Hamida
20:04Hello?
20:07Yeah, is this Sid?
20:09Uh, yeah.
20:10Hi.
20:11Hi.
20:11This is Shah Latif.
20:13Is it?
20:14Actually.
20:15Yeah, it is actually.
20:16Bro, I just want to say, I am so, so sorry for what happened yesterday.
20:24No excuses.
20:25I was bang out of order.
20:29I just don't know what came over me.
20:30I really hope you can find it in your heart to please forgive me.
20:36Yo, I appreciate this, man.
20:40Like, I really do.
20:41I was going to call my lawyers, but then the fact you called, man.
20:45Oh, bro, he's been eating me up the whole day.
20:47I can't tell you how much this means, man.
20:49Legit.
20:53Well...
20:53Do you mind just sending me what you just said?
20:56Like, in a recording?
20:59Sorry?
21:00I need the engagement, bro.
21:02Right.
21:03I mean, I...
21:04I guess so.
21:05Nice, Ryan.
21:06Appreciate it.
21:07Alright.
21:07Oh, and thanks for the follow, mate.
21:09Just remember, keep the vid under 90 for the algorithm, yeah?
21:14Mm-hmm.
21:14I will do.
21:15All right.
21:16Safe.
21:16Safe.
21:19Ah!
21:29Bye-bye.
21:30Bye-bye.
21:32Bye-bye.
21:33Bye-bye.
21:34Bye-bye.
21:35Bye-bye.
21:36Bye-bye.
21:37Bye-bye.
21:37Bye-bye.
21:37Bye-bye.
21:37Bye-bye.
21:37What happened?
21:38He fell.
21:38He moved.
21:39Why was he praying on a chair already?
21:41Oh, you want to sit down?
21:42Come.
21:43Easy, easy, easy.
21:44Bye-bye.
21:44How's your breathing, okay?
21:46you okay huh why didn't you sit him down but now you want to be involved what the
21:49fuck's that supposed to mean i'm doing something for yourself don't come up me
21:52you always fucking want to be the hero and you're never a right
21:56huh baba is anyone getting any water i'm going to get a blanket or something
22:05are you good bro bro are you good are you dumb he's a fucking diabetic and you're giving him
22:13boxes of sweets shabash bit up so i just fuck off again yeah you better when i'm not around that's
22:17what you're saying no no he's not my dad he's your dad huh shut you you know what you think
22:22you're a
22:23fucking bad man yeah how fucking yeah my people is my how the fuck you're gonna help your people
22:27if you're too busy sucking white people's dicks he's just crying about last night bro what you came in to
22:33take care of me you came for a free fucking meal bro i thought you're giving out your little business
22:36cards that's some sweet little minicap driver now it now he's a leech man tell the truth he's
22:41been leeching off me my whole life what are you now you're trying to leech off this dickhead bro he
22:44doesn't care about your shitty ideas he's trying to chirp your little sister what only jersey i love
22:49her all right what the fuck man are you fucking are you mad listen don't listen to him he's lost
22:54the
22:54fucking plot he's been chatting to a pig's head in the freezer what what freezer in the garage and he's
22:58been talking to it you're talking to a pig's head oh what if i have what if i have what
23:02if i have
23:02better listener than any of you lot well that's what happens when you're related to you guys i'm not the
23:06first family member to lose my mind hey hey hello shadow why are you why are you saying it comes
23:14out
23:14to me no no i'm asking why is he saying that to me what did i do what i do
23:18i'm trying to make a
23:19difference i'm not just sat there complaining about everything well you lot would judge me
23:22huh why are you touching me don't touch me i'm trying to change your world all right so anyone doesn't
23:28look at you and think it's some fucking worthless stinking bitter baggy look at me get the
23:34fuck out of it what's wrong oh no problem am i she blames you for what happened to your mum
23:37bro shut up
23:54oh
23:59yeah
24:00Oh
24:07Yeah
24:14Isk
24:20Do pialy bharke dhe sagi mein gulfan ki
24:25ھیک اپنے نام کی اور ایک اللہ نام کی
24:31میٹ دے پوری تمنہ اس پلے ناکام کی
24:35اور دے دے دے درد میں صورت کو ہی آرام کی
24:40گھوٹی پلوا مگر جوشے تمنہ ڈال کر
24:44ایک قطرہ دے مگر قطرے میں دریا ڈال کر
24:49O'er sa'qui teri khair, teri main kadhe ki khair
25:19.
25:49.
26:20.
26:20.
26:20.
26:20.
26:21.
26:21.
26:21.
26:22.
26:25.
26:25.
26:25.
26:26.
26:27.
26:27.
26:27.
26:27.
26:27.
26:27.
26:29.
26:29.
26:29.
26:29.
26:29.
26:29.
26:29.
26:29.
26:29.
26:29.
26:29.
26:30.
26:30.
26:31.
26:31.
26:31.
26:31.
26:31.
26:31.
Comments