Richard Pryor performs his stand-up comedy act on the Sunset Strip.
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00:00:28Transcription by CastingWords
00:00:58CastingWords
00:01:07CastingWords
00:01:24CastingWords
00:01:45CastingWords
00:02:48We are gathered here today to make sure everyone eats, if not each other, food.
00:03:15I was going to talk about something that's very serious and I hope no one gets offended.
00:03:21I want to talk about fucking.
00:03:24And sometimes I talk about it and a lot of people in the audience don't know what I mean.
00:03:29So, would you raise your hand if you don't know what fucking is, so we can watch your ass
00:03:35when you leave here.
00:03:38There's not enough fucking going on in America.
00:03:43Americans, Reagan get in, you stop fucking.
00:03:47We fucked when Carter was in, we fucked all the time.
00:03:50Just had, there was nothing else to do.
00:03:52Hey, let's fuck.
00:03:54President making a speech, let's fuck.
00:03:58Reagan in now, everybody listen to this motherfucker.
00:04:00We can't fuck now.
00:04:03I say get them last few fucks in now.
00:04:15See, I know one of the advantages like when you're in show business, the little extra treat
00:04:20you get is that, you get pussy.
00:04:24And no, you know, the great pussy drought of the fifties, I was caught up in that motherfucker.
00:04:33I'm talking about, I discovered masturbating by accident.
00:04:41I'm not lying.
00:04:42I was about 10, I was in the tub and that's when you used to have to hold your dick
00:04:47with
00:04:47two fingers.
00:04:50You remember when you was little, I could hear, right, I was in the tub and I said, hey.
00:05:05I'm on to something here.
00:05:08I bet dad don't know about this.
00:05:13And then when you was young, remember men, right, we didn't cum or nothing.
00:05:17You just made that funny feeling, you know, yeah.
00:05:19Who are you?
00:05:22First time I came, ejaculated, scared the fuck out of me, man.
00:05:26I thought something was wrong.
00:05:28I was with this woman and said, look at the fuck you done there.
00:05:33About an hour later though, I was back to my, can you do it again?
00:05:40Women are so cool about sex.
00:05:42They like it as much as we do, but they can be cooler.
00:05:45They say, you want the fuck?
00:05:46No.
00:05:48And they go home and have all that electrical equipment.
00:05:56I can't get off behind that long shit and nothing.
00:06:02I remember one time I got some Playboy bunny pussy.
00:06:06I thought I was in the big time.
00:06:09Going home with a Playboy bunny.
00:06:12You dig?
00:06:13We was going to have a nice little midnight snack.
00:06:16I went to her apartment.
00:06:18It was one apartment.
00:06:19It was bad.
00:06:20It was one apartment.
00:06:21She said, if I don't get the pussy, I can fuck this couch.
00:06:31And she, we started talking and she had seen my act.
00:06:33She said, oh, I really liked the way you do those little kids in your act.
00:06:37I said, great.
00:06:38Can you talk like a little kid?
00:06:44She said, what, now?
00:06:47Yeah, just do a little.
00:06:49I feel fun.
00:06:50I mean, okay, you mean like when I do this?
00:06:54Like that?
00:06:55She said, yeah.
00:07:02I said, you like that, huh?
00:07:05And she started taking off clothes.
00:07:09And the more clothes she took off, the younger I got.
00:07:14When she got to her panties, I was on the floor talking about,
00:07:17my moon, my moon.
00:07:24She gave birth to me about 9.30.
00:07:32Kind of some water.
00:07:34There was supposed to be a stool and some water or something.
00:07:37Is it April Fool?
00:07:37Oh, this is the one.
00:07:39I had to walk way the fuck over there to get some water.
00:07:43Thank you, brother.
00:07:44Don't trip.
00:07:44You're nervous than me.
00:07:45Shit.
00:07:47I wish I'd had a picture of that shit.
00:07:56Huh?
00:07:58Water.
00:08:00As far as I know,
00:08:02I hope I don't start dripping.
00:08:08Did that?
00:08:08Was that here all the time?
00:08:12Huh?
00:08:14That motherfucker been there all the time?
00:08:18Wait a minute.
00:08:19We don't know nothing but the drum and photographic memory.
00:08:23This motherfucker was not here.
00:08:25See, we may not be literate, but we visual and a motherfucker.
00:08:36I just needed a little water to relax.
00:08:41Calm down.
00:08:44Because I feel the tension from y'all.
00:08:46Y'all want me to do so well.
00:08:47I want to do so well for you.
00:08:49But let's relax and enjoy whatever the fuck happens.
00:08:55I got my check.
00:09:02I'm telling you something.
00:09:03I got so fucking nervous.
00:09:06Myself today, I forgot what the fuck I did.
00:09:10I was at home.
00:09:12I said, I know I do something.
00:09:14Because there's too many white folks paying attention to me.
00:09:21For me not to be in jail and shit.
00:09:28I used to think when I first started, I said,
00:09:30maybe I ain't funny no more.
00:09:32Maybe I ain't angry at nothing for real in my heart.
00:09:36You know, I just say, I'm just not mad about it.
00:09:39I don't get it.
00:09:41Motherfuckers want to kill yourselves.
00:09:42That's your business.
00:09:43Just don't do it on my porch.
00:09:47And it really takes a lot to get up to start working, like, again, on stage.
00:09:51Because then your mind ain't there, and your spirit, and you're trying to go for it.
00:09:55And greed is a bitch.
00:09:57Greed. Say, go ahead, do it.
00:09:58They offer you so much money, and you're greedy.
00:10:01And then your humanity is larger than anything, right?
00:10:03And they say, but you're not like that.
00:10:05You know, I rip people off, and try to do the best.
00:10:09And you go out there, and you make an ass of yourself, and embarrass your friends, and hold your dick.
00:10:19My greed does not exceed my self-respect.
00:10:22My greed is good, though.
00:10:24Greed is running a close motherfucking second.
00:10:28Greed is up there when I'm asleep.
00:10:30Greed is working on the self-respect.
00:10:31I'm like, say, why don't you just do it for a little more?
00:10:35No, but I do a lot of shit nowadays.
00:10:38I never did one.
00:10:38I didn't have money.
00:10:39I didn't have the problems that I have now, like watching motherfuckers count it.
00:10:48I must drive my accountant crazy, because I wake up at 3 in the morning and go,
00:10:52Hey man, what the fuck, how much is it?
00:10:57Well, prove it.
00:10:58Bring it over.
00:11:01About 3 in the morning.
00:11:02Fuck that.
00:11:03I want to see it now.
00:11:06And I got lawyers and shit.
00:11:08You know, lawyers are some expensive motherfuckers.
00:11:11I got a lawyer.
00:11:12First week, the motherfucker bought me a bill for $40,000.
00:11:17I said, motherfucker, I just met you.
00:11:23And lawyers, they don't get upset.
00:11:25Right?
00:11:25God damn it.
00:11:26Wait a minute.
00:11:27Don't worry.
00:11:30Everything will be all right.
00:11:33No, but I want to know why you get your...
00:11:36Take it easy.
00:11:38And you leave there feeling like an asshole.
00:11:41Right? You've been going, what the fuck am I yelling about?
00:11:43They come?
00:11:44I'm just facing 47 years.
00:11:48Them motherfuckers will keep you out of penitentiary and out of a lot of courts.
00:11:53But it's gonna cost a lot.
00:11:57Some people must say, fuck it.
00:11:59I'll go to penitentiary.
00:12:02You motherfuckers cost too much.
00:12:05I can do 10 years in the penitentiary and get off better.
00:12:08And he's 30, you gonna put on me.
00:12:14I met some lawyers, right?
00:12:16I had a guy I'm suing.
00:12:17It's a black attorney.
00:12:18Was my brother.
00:12:20Right on.
00:12:22He was.
00:12:22He was beautiful.
00:12:23My brother.
00:12:24My brother.
00:12:25They took me hook, line, and sang it.
00:12:28On dry land.
00:12:33I don't know.
00:12:34I just know that this is wonderful.
00:12:37Especially this suit.
00:12:39That I have on.
00:12:42I thought.
00:12:44If I have a monkey, me in this suit would be hot.
00:12:48You know what I'm saying?
00:12:49Rims and bens at all the ferns that they live for.
00:12:53Because I can't wear this kind of shit real comfortable.
00:12:56You have to be cool.
00:12:57Billy Dee Williams could hang in this motherfucker.
00:13:02I don't know.
00:13:04I don't know.
00:13:06Me, when I wear shit like this, I'm always afraid one motherfucker, someone would say,
00:13:10What you doing in that red suit, you ugly motherfucker?
00:13:15I don't fuck around anymore since I got married.
00:13:18I am married.
00:13:19I don't fuck around.
00:13:28That's right.
00:13:29When you are married, say you don't fuck around.
00:13:31If you got any brains.
00:13:35My wife, did you fuck?
00:13:37No, I was not fucking her.
00:13:39I don't care what you think you saw.
00:13:42I was not fucking her.
00:13:45Now you gonna believe me or your lying eyes.
00:13:50I was not fucking her.
00:13:55And my wife, my wife has been putting up with me.
00:13:58I mean, we went together six years before the bitch landed me.
00:14:01Cause she paid dues.
00:14:04Cause I am no day at the beach.
00:14:07I know I'm hard to get along with.
00:14:09I know that.
00:14:10Cause I might wake up in the morning and go,
00:14:12Hey, wake up.
00:14:15What was that shit you said last February?
00:14:20This is my fourth, fifth, sixth marriage, eighth.
00:14:23I don't know.
00:14:25But I remember every woman that I was ever in love with.
00:14:29I remember all 12 of them.
00:14:30I really did.
00:14:31They were wonderful.
00:14:32It's just, I don't know.
00:14:34I've never been able to have a,
00:14:35what they call a,
00:14:36a sustain a relationship.
00:14:38That's what it's called now.
00:14:39And in other words,
00:14:41when you stop wanting to be with a motherfucker,
00:14:42you leave.
00:14:43That's what I do.
00:14:45Most people hang around to the shit,
00:14:47get all,
00:14:47it makes you look ugly and shit.
00:14:49And you be hanging out with a bitch.
00:14:50You don't want to be with them.
00:14:51Yeah.
00:14:51This is my lady.
00:14:57I don't know.
00:14:58I didn't got into feeling.
00:14:58I didn't got married.
00:14:59That gets you into feelings and shit.
00:15:01When you get married,
00:15:01you have to feel,
00:15:02you know,
00:15:02my wife says feel,
00:15:04express your feelings.
00:15:06Darling,
00:15:06don't lock it up.
00:15:08Just speak your mind.
00:15:09I didn't try.
00:15:09When I was just fucking around,
00:15:11I didn't have to say shit,
00:15:12but can I fuck?
00:15:15Goodbye.
00:15:16Here's the money for a cab.
00:15:20But now it's different.
00:15:22When you're married,
00:15:23you know,
00:15:23this is about the time I've been married.
00:15:25And it's really exciting
00:15:27because I really am trying.
00:15:30I really am trying.
00:15:33I'm telling you,
00:15:34I'm fucking trying.
00:15:36Okay.
00:15:37But it's hard to wake up
00:15:39and see the same person
00:15:40all the fucking time.
00:15:43I know this works for women too.
00:15:46I mean,
00:15:46it's the same motherfucker.
00:15:49All the time.
00:15:53Thank you, baby,
00:15:54but God damn.
00:15:56Not today,
00:15:57God damn it.
00:15:59I don't want to fuck you anymore
00:16:02for eight months.
00:16:05You know,
00:16:06let's make our sexual life interesting.
00:16:09You go away for a year.
00:16:12When you come back,
00:16:14we will fuck like rabbits.
00:16:18And my wife always
00:16:19talking about express yourself.
00:16:21Darling,
00:16:22express your feelings,
00:16:23emotions.
00:16:24Try to talk.
00:16:24Try to not to be so physical.
00:16:26Learn how to speak.
00:16:28Try to talk.
00:16:29Now, darling,
00:16:30what is the problem?
00:16:30Bitch, I want to chill.
00:16:37And my wife is white
00:16:38and the first two years
00:16:40we went together,
00:16:41she thought our name was
00:16:42White Hungry Bitch.
00:16:49She did.
00:16:50She put up with the shit.
00:16:51I learned, though, after that.
00:16:52I mean,
00:16:53because I was deaf on her.
00:16:54White Hungry Bitch
00:16:55and the black man this
00:16:56and you don't know shit.
00:16:58You know,
00:16:59but I stayed with the motherfucker.
00:17:00I kept staying.
00:17:00I grew.
00:17:01So,
00:17:02it can happen.
00:17:03If it happened to me,
00:17:04it could happen to you.
00:17:08She's wonderful, though,
00:17:09about expressing yourself.
00:17:10I get mad.
00:17:11I can't even talk.
00:17:12You know,
00:17:13the madder I get,
00:17:14the quieter I get.
00:17:15My voice just goes down
00:17:17and down.
00:17:18Especially,
00:17:18well,
00:17:19all right.
00:17:20I'm trying to...
00:17:52Feelings are a hard fucking thing to deal with.
00:17:55I don't give a fuck who you are.
00:17:56It's not easy to be bullshitting,
00:17:58you know,
00:17:58but when you get them feelings
00:17:59somebody touches that shit inside you,
00:18:01that shit will be fucking with you.
00:18:03When they make a man...
00:18:04And women,
00:18:04I don't give a fuck.
00:18:05You all can be so cool
00:18:08about turning the motherfucker off.
00:18:09You love when a motherfucker be in love with you
00:18:11because you can be some nasty bitches.
00:18:14When the motherfucker,
00:18:15darling, please don't let me just give you...
00:18:16Oh God,
00:18:17are you calling again?
00:18:23God,
00:18:23Richard,
00:18:24please,
00:18:25just don't do this to yourself.
00:18:31I mean,
00:18:31why don't you go home and bathe
00:18:33or something like that?
00:18:34Just,
00:18:35don't call here anymore.
00:18:36Just a minute,
00:18:37John.
00:18:45How can women be so cool though
00:18:47when you angry?
00:18:48Don't you tell me,
00:18:50I love you,
00:18:50don't you see?
00:18:51Yes, dear,
00:18:52I'm going for a walk.
00:18:56A walk?
00:18:58I wanna fight!
00:19:02One night,
00:19:03I left the house
00:19:04about a hundred and thirty-seven times.
00:19:07I did,
00:19:08I just said,
00:19:09fuck you!
00:19:12And then,
00:19:12I'd have to come back,
00:19:13like, you forget your keys?
00:19:15You ever leave
00:19:15and forget your keys?
00:19:17Bitch,
00:19:18yeah!
00:19:18Motherfucker!
00:19:20Yeah!
00:19:21Uh-huh!
00:19:23Bleed that shit!
00:19:26Yeah!
00:19:27You'll see.
00:19:30Oh, shit.
00:19:33Then you got to go back
00:19:35in the house.
00:19:37Why come your old lady
00:19:38look so good
00:19:39after you've been away
00:19:40for a while?
00:19:42Right?
00:19:42You ever, like,
00:19:43get your heart broke
00:19:44like men here?
00:19:45You ever had your heart broke
00:19:46like men don't get there?
00:19:47Women get their heart broke,
00:19:48they cry.
00:19:50Men don't do that shit.
00:19:51Men hold that shit in
00:19:52like it don't hurt.
00:19:53Walk around
00:19:54and get hit by trucks.
00:19:58Said,
00:19:59didn't he see that truck?
00:20:00He said,
00:20:01motherfucker,
00:20:01he wouldn't have seen
00:20:02a 747.
00:20:04Cause his heart was broke.
00:20:07Right?
00:20:07I mean, there's a feeling
00:20:08getting your motherfucking
00:20:10heart broke
00:20:11is like,
00:20:12I don't know,
00:20:12it's like,
00:20:13men cannot graduate
00:20:16till a woman
00:20:16breaks your fucking heart.
00:20:19that is your diploma.
00:20:22It either kill you
00:20:23or make you fat.
00:20:26I'm talking about
00:20:26that heartache
00:20:27where your motherfucking
00:20:28heart be, ooh,
00:20:29hurting and shit
00:20:31and you be,
00:20:31you can't even listen
00:20:32to music.
00:20:34Shit remind like
00:20:35Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
00:20:37That reminds me
00:20:38of my lady.
00:20:40She got a nose
00:20:42just like Rudolph.
00:20:46And you go out
00:20:47with other women
00:20:48when you love,
00:20:49you go out with other women
00:20:49don't mean shit.
00:20:51Right?
00:20:51You go out with other women
00:20:52and they talking,
00:20:53they go,
00:20:53you hear their voice,
00:20:54they go,
00:20:54what is this bitch talking about?
00:20:59Why don't she just
00:21:00shut the fuck up?
00:21:02She ain't saying shit.
00:21:04Cause it's hard
00:21:06to reestablish yourself
00:21:07with other people
00:21:08once you've been
00:21:08with a partner
00:21:09for a long time.
00:21:10Especially if you get
00:21:11a good woman
00:21:12that you really
00:21:12be in love with.
00:21:13And usually,
00:21:13it's the man
00:21:14that fucks up.
00:21:15We fuck up, right?
00:21:16Then we can't find
00:21:17them motherfuckers
00:21:18no more.
00:21:21And when you can't
00:21:22find her no more,
00:21:23it look like
00:21:24she get better.
00:21:26Every time you see her,
00:21:27she be beautiful
00:21:27or with some other
00:21:28motherfucker
00:21:29that look good.
00:21:30I be going,
00:21:31I want to kill
00:21:32everybody.
00:21:35Everybody
00:21:35in the world.
00:21:37That's how you end up
00:21:38in penitentiary, Jack.
00:21:40A lot of people
00:21:41in penitentiary
00:21:41done killed their old
00:21:42ladies and shit.
00:21:44And boyfriends
00:21:44and shit.
00:21:45Like, they just flip out.
00:21:46I don't give a fuck.
00:21:48At least I don't have
00:21:49to look at them anymore.
00:21:52I went to penitentiary.
00:21:54Gene Wilde,
00:21:54I did a movie.
00:21:55I went to, not me personally.
00:21:56I mean, I went to do
00:21:57a film in penitentiary.
00:22:00And it was,
00:22:01I was up there six weeks,
00:22:02Arizona State Penitentiary.
00:22:04It was some,
00:22:06oh, you applauding for that?
00:22:09Arizona State Penitentiary
00:22:11real popular.
00:22:13Oh man, it was strange
00:22:14because it's like
00:22:1580% black people.
00:22:18And what's strange
00:22:20about that
00:22:20is that there are
00:22:21no black people
00:22:22in Arizona.
00:22:28I'm not lying.
00:22:29They bust motherfuckers in.
00:22:32And I was up there
00:22:33and I just looked at
00:22:34all the brothers
00:22:35and it made my heart ache.
00:22:37You know, it's all
00:22:37these beautiful black men
00:22:38and the joint
00:22:39goddamn warriors
00:22:40should be out there
00:22:41helping the masses.
00:22:42And I felt that way.
00:22:44I was real naive, right?
00:22:45In six weeks
00:22:46I was up there.
00:22:47I talked to the brothers,
00:22:48you know,
00:22:48and I talked to them.
00:22:50Thank God
00:22:51we got penitentiaries.
00:23:04I asked them,
00:23:05I said,
00:23:06why did you kill
00:23:07everybody in the house?
00:23:11Because they was home.
00:23:20I mean murderers.
00:23:22Do you hear me?
00:23:24Real live murderers.
00:23:26I thought black people
00:23:27killed people by accident.
00:23:29No, these motherfuckers
00:23:31was murderers.
00:23:32I meant one brother.
00:23:33His name was J-Bo.
00:23:34Motherfucker lift weights.
00:23:35He was in charge of it.
00:23:36J-Bo.
00:23:37Muscles every motherfucking way.
00:23:38That's my man.
00:23:39Muscling.
00:23:39He was doing a sentence,
00:23:41triple life.
00:23:43How in the fuck
00:23:45do you do
00:23:45triple life?
00:23:48I mean,
00:23:49I mean,
00:23:50if he die
00:23:50and come back,
00:23:53he got to go
00:23:54to penitentiary.
00:23:57Right?
00:24:01They say,
00:24:02fuck kindergarten.
00:24:02Get your little old ass
00:24:03back in the penitentiary.
00:24:04Motherfucker.
00:24:05You know what you did
00:24:06last time you were there.
00:24:09Gene Wider loved
00:24:10to jump in the middle
00:24:11of the killers
00:24:11and start talking.
00:24:12Hi, guys.
00:24:13How you doing?
00:24:14I said, Gene,
00:24:15bring your ass out.
00:24:17What do you think
00:24:17they'd do to us
00:24:18if we were here, Rich?
00:24:19I said, fuck us.
00:24:26And Gene said,
00:24:27I'm not homosexual.
00:24:28Homosexual ain't got
00:24:29nothing to do with it.
00:24:30They don't fuck you
00:24:31cause you like it.
00:24:33They just fuck you
00:24:34just to see that look
00:24:35on your face.
00:24:44I meant one dude
00:24:45kidnapped,
00:24:46murdered four times.
00:24:47And I thought three times
00:24:49that was your ass.
00:24:50Right?
00:24:50No.
00:24:51I said, what happened?
00:24:52I can't get your shit right.
00:24:55But I'm getting parole
00:24:56in two years,
00:24:57brother Rich.
00:24:58I'm gonna fire it up.
00:24:59You know, I got some
00:24:59contacts outside.
00:25:00You know what I mean?
00:25:02I said, yeah,
00:25:03I know what you mean.
00:25:05See, I wanna know
00:25:06when this motherfucker
00:25:07getting out.
00:25:09Who he gonna be with.
00:25:12And if I see him
00:25:13in my neighborhood,
00:25:14I'm just gonna shoot
00:25:15the motherfucker.
00:25:17Cause I do not
00:25:18wanna be kidnapped.
00:25:19Take no chance.
00:25:20No motherfucker
00:25:21calling up my wife
00:25:22talking about
00:25:22sending some money.
00:25:24Cause that's really
00:25:25my ass.
00:25:27I said,
00:25:28well,
00:25:29don't fuck up the suit.
00:25:30That's what we're
00:25:31gonna bury him in.
00:25:34I'm gonna take my chances.
00:25:36Damn,
00:25:36I'm gonna be kidnapped
00:25:37putting my hands
00:25:38behind my back.
00:25:39Cause they always like
00:25:40to make you put your hands
00:25:41behind your back and shit
00:25:42and then fuck with you
00:25:43a little while.
00:25:45I said, no motherfucker,
00:25:46blow my face off
00:25:46with the shotgun
00:25:47while I got my hands
00:25:49on your nuts.
00:25:52So there'd be some evidence.
00:25:56The police come in.
00:25:57I open his hand.
00:26:00This guy's gonna be
00:26:01easy to find.
00:26:04He's gonna show up
00:26:04to the hospital sooner
00:26:05or later.
00:26:11They do.
00:26:12They always put that shotgun
00:26:13on your back.
00:26:14You ain't got to do shit.
00:26:15That's easy to say,
00:26:16but in real life,
00:26:17we all know,
00:26:17a shotgun,
00:26:18your hand
00:26:19will automatically
00:26:20jump behind your back.
00:26:23Even if you don't want it
00:26:24to your hand say,
00:26:24fuck you.
00:26:26It's a shotgun, asshole.
00:26:29Give me that rope.
00:26:31I'll tie it myself.
00:26:33Is this a good knot?
00:26:38I mean,
00:26:38everybody like to be brave,
00:26:40right?
00:26:40In the real situation,
00:26:41but we ain't so brave
00:26:42sometimes, you know?
00:26:43I mean,
00:26:44sometimes you be brave.
00:26:46just ordinary, you know?
00:26:47Hope we don't get in those
00:26:48situations where you have
00:26:49to be brave.
00:26:50That's how the Nazis
00:26:51fucked over people.
00:26:52Because most people
00:26:53are basically decent.
00:26:54Them Nazis just run
00:26:55over motherfuckers.
00:26:56Because black people
00:26:57always say, fuck,
00:26:58I'd have told them,
00:26:58you wouldn't have told them
00:26:59Nazis shit.
00:27:04Because them motherfuckers
00:27:05didn't play.
00:27:06You be out there talking
00:27:07hey, motherfucker,
00:27:08you're Mr. Nazi.
00:27:11What's is this?
00:27:14Oh, nothing.
00:27:15Just, uh...
00:27:17Just fuck around.
00:27:20Like them boots you got on home.
00:27:26And penitentiary, man,
00:27:27they got all them racist groups.
00:27:29You got the white groups,
00:27:30hate,
00:27:31they act like they're in New York.
00:27:34They got the Nazi party
00:27:36and the,
00:27:37what they call it,
00:27:38the Klu Klux Klan.
00:27:39The Mexicans got them gangs,
00:27:41you can't pronounce the names.
00:27:44And they don't wear no shirts.
00:27:47Black people got the mile miles
00:27:49and the Muslims,
00:27:50double Muslims.
00:27:52Them's the one you don't fuck with them,
00:27:53double Muslims.
00:27:55Cause them motherfuckers can't wait
00:27:57to get to our lock.
00:28:02And want to take eight
00:28:03or nine motherfuckers with them.
00:28:07I used to be a thief
00:28:09and I wasn't very good.
00:28:10I always got caught.
00:28:12And I would steal from neighbors.
00:28:14I wouldn't take no chances
00:28:16on getting caught too far from home.
00:28:19I'd go over to the neighbor's house,
00:28:21wipe them motherfuckers out.
00:28:23I paid them all back.
00:28:24Now I try to go back to Peru.
00:28:25I'm ashamed of myself.
00:28:26Miss Johnson,
00:28:27I'm sorry I busted in your house.
00:28:30I knew it was you boy.
00:28:34I don't know why I would steal.
00:28:36I remember my grandfather
00:28:37was in business.
00:28:38My family was in business.
00:28:40My,
00:28:40my grandmother owned like
00:28:41three or four brothels.
00:28:42And my grandfather had a pool hall,
00:28:45right?
00:28:46Called Pop's Pool Room.
00:28:48My uncle had a pool room.
00:28:49So it was money in the family.
00:28:50I was a lucky black child, right?
00:28:52Cause I never went through
00:28:53no hard times about shit.
00:28:57It was hard.
00:28:58If you wasn't poor,
00:28:58you couldn't get no pussy.
00:29:01Say we fucked just to keep our minds off eating.
00:29:11I live in Hawaii in a place.
00:29:13I wanted to go to a place where there was no people.
00:29:16And I found the place.
00:29:17There was 500 people live where I live.
00:29:19and they're brown.
00:29:21And that,
00:29:22I like that because you can sleep at night.
00:29:24You know,
00:29:25cause you live around white people in the country.
00:29:27Anything can happen.
00:29:31Not that I don't trust white people.
00:29:33It's just that in the night.
00:29:34You know what I mean?
00:29:37I don't know.
00:29:38Something happens to white people.
00:29:39You start drinking.
00:29:40And when you hear one of them go,
00:29:42Yee-haw!
00:29:47You know what I mean?
00:29:49I mean,
00:29:50it makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up.
00:29:53Cause I know what's next.
00:29:56After yee-haw,
00:29:57you get a rope
00:29:58and get a black motherfucker.
00:30:02I say, why?
00:30:03Because they have the greatest kind of resistance
00:30:04against the rope.
00:30:06I mean,
00:30:07you can lasso a white guy.
00:30:08You won't do nothing.
00:30:09Black one,
00:30:10they're going to jerk away.
00:30:17I like those guys.
00:30:19You want to sign this for my sister?
00:30:27Hey buddy,
00:30:28you want to kiss my girl?
00:30:30Not on the lips.
00:30:34Okay.
00:30:44Racism is a bitch.
00:30:46I mean, white people,
00:30:46you gotta know.
00:30:47It fucks you up,
00:30:48but what it does to black people is a bitch.
00:30:50Because no matter what it...
00:30:52It's hard enough being a human being.
00:30:54It's really fucking hard enough just to be that.
00:30:58Right?
00:30:58Just to go through everyday life
00:31:00without murdering a motherfucker.
00:31:02It's hard enough just to walk through life
00:31:05decent as a person.
00:31:07I mean,
00:31:07but here's another element added to it when you're black.
00:31:10Your mother's got that little edge on us.
00:31:12It's enough to make you crazy.
00:31:16It's if you're in an argument with another man,
00:31:18he may be white,
00:31:19but it's man on man for a minute,
00:31:21and the shit get rough,
00:31:22he end up calling you,
00:31:23nigga.
00:31:24You gotta go,
00:31:25oh shit.
00:31:28Fuck.
00:31:29Nah, I ain't no man no more.
00:31:31I'm nigga.
00:31:31Nah, I got to argue with that shit.
00:31:34Fuck, throw my balance all off now.
00:31:37You know, but it's an ugly thing.
00:31:39I hope someday they give it up.
00:31:41Cause it won't work.
00:31:49It's nice to have pride about your shit.
00:31:51I went home to the motherland,
00:31:53and everybody should go home to Africa.
00:31:56Everybody.
00:31:57Especially black people.
00:31:59Really man,
00:32:00there is so much to see there for the eye and the heart
00:32:03of the black people.
00:32:04Cause white people,
00:32:05you'll go there and you'll get ideas.
00:32:06Well that's the way the black people in America
00:32:08should be walking around with sticks.
00:32:11You'll get the wrong idea.
00:32:13But man, you go,
00:32:14I went to the motherland,
00:32:15I was gonna find my roots,
00:32:16right?
00:32:18700 million black people.
00:32:19Not one of them motherfuckers knew me.
00:32:24I looked in every phone book in Africa.
00:32:27I didn't find one goddamn pride.
00:32:32I saw one familiar name, J. Bo Walker.
00:32:35I call that up.
00:32:37They say he's in Arizona.
00:32:45But it's nothing like going and seeing nothing but black.
00:32:49Black people.
00:32:50I mean,
00:32:51from the wino to the president.
00:32:53It's black people.
00:32:54And it's like fair.
00:32:56You know what I mean?
00:32:57You go someplace,
00:32:58you're on liberated land.
00:32:59I said these motherfuckers kicked ass and got their country.
00:33:02And I'm on the land.
00:33:04It's black people.
00:33:06I mean black,
00:33:07original black.
00:33:09You understand black.
00:33:10I mean,
00:33:11so many black people made me realize somebody in my family been lying to me.
00:33:21And it's nice as you land at the airport,
00:33:23you look out the window and see the black people.
00:33:25Wow.
00:33:26People are the same.
00:33:28The people in Africa fuck over your luggage just like the people in New York.
00:33:35You know what's funny, man?
00:33:37To walk down the street and see white people looking for each other.
00:33:54And every black person I saw there seemed to remind me of someone from here, man.
00:33:59I walked down the street.
00:34:00I go,
00:34:00that motherfucker look like Joe Frazier.
00:34:04I said,
00:34:05God damn.
00:34:06He'd be the president of the bank.
00:34:08I go,
00:34:09God damn.
00:34:10I wish Joe Frazier could see this motherfucker.
00:34:14Or someone here,
00:34:15like as a wino.
00:34:16You see him over there,
00:34:17man,
00:34:17they'd be a diplomat.
00:34:19You go,
00:34:19Willie the wino.
00:34:21God damn.
00:34:23Get down with that.
00:34:26And this was,
00:34:27I don't know.
00:34:27It was special to me,
00:34:28man,
00:34:29to go out.
00:34:29Like I went to the jungle,
00:34:31the real jungle.
00:34:31Not that shit Tarzan live in.
00:34:36Tarzan wouldn't last a week in Africa.
00:34:39Right?
00:34:40You say,
00:34:40where's Tarzan?
00:34:41You mean the crazy white man?
00:34:43He in the trees with cheetah.
00:34:46So where's Jane?
00:34:47She horned in Nairobi.
00:34:50Cause when you go out in the bush,
00:34:53you see animals.
00:34:55I mean,
00:34:55animals that are free look different than that shit we see in the zoo.
00:34:59You know them animals you fuck over at the zoo?
00:35:02Cause you see the lion at the zoo you be talking about.
00:35:10Right?
00:35:11You walk by,
00:35:11hey lion.
00:35:12Hey.
00:35:15I like the monkeys in the zoo.
00:35:16They throw their shit on me.
00:35:20You know,
00:35:20they be picking and shit.
00:35:22And they watch you.
00:35:23And the mother go.
00:35:26And then everybody laugh.
00:35:27Oh,
00:35:27he's so cute.
00:35:29Oh,
00:35:30the monkey's cute.
00:35:32Why do people think bears are happy in the zoo?
00:35:34Like,
00:35:34look at the bear.
00:35:35He's so happy.
00:35:36Let me out.
00:35:39Just give me a break.
00:35:40Let me get one of,
00:35:42if I could get a hand on one of you motherfuckers.
00:35:45Oh,
00:35:46I'll tell you where.
00:35:47Sup?
00:35:49I ain't got no pussy in the zoo.
00:35:50Yeah.
00:35:52Send me a motherfucking panda.
00:35:56Bitch ain't even got a pussy yet.
00:35:57He's like,
00:35:58wonder why we ain't got no babies.
00:36:02But in the jungle,
00:36:03if you see a rabbit,
00:36:05you get nervous.
00:36:06Cause the rabbit be looking at your head.
00:36:08I'm like,
00:36:11I said,
00:36:11roll the window up, dear.
00:36:13I said,
00:36:13it's just a rabbit.
00:36:14Fuck you.
00:36:16Ain't no rabbit ever looked at me like that.
00:36:20And you see a lion in the jungle.
00:36:22That's what they look like.
00:36:23Lions.
00:36:24Motherfucker be in the bush talking about.
00:36:28Yeah, get your ass out the car.
00:36:33And bring that camera with you.
00:36:36Cause we gonna eat all that shit.
00:36:43I saw three lions chase down like a,
00:36:47a Cape Buffalo.
00:36:48That's the baddest motherfucker on four legs.
00:36:51Except for these bitches chasing it.
00:36:55And the lioness,
00:36:56they work in,
00:36:57they work around like in teams,
00:36:59give signals.
00:36:59You know,
00:37:00they can't talk.
00:37:05And the buffalo saw one of them,
00:37:07right?
00:37:08And he tipped away from the rest of the herd.
00:37:10What was it?
00:37:15And them two others jumped on its ass.
00:37:18And the other buffalo said,
00:37:19that motherfucker didn't warn us.
00:37:22And you know how the buzzards circle in the movies?
00:37:25These motherfuckers drove up in a truck.
00:37:29Talking about what it is.
00:37:34Cheetah, man,
00:37:35is the weirdest thing to see go chase something.
00:37:37Cause you don't see nothing but dust.
00:37:39I saw two cheetahs.
00:37:41And it looked like they were talking about
00:37:42jumping on some gazelle.
00:37:44There you go.
00:37:45You want to go after that herd?
00:37:47Say, nah, man.
00:37:48They're too close, shit.
00:37:52Why don't we give them another hundred yards?
00:37:56How's the wife and family, man?
00:37:59You know, it's gonna be tourist season soon.
00:38:02I got an arm last year.
00:38:06They're about far enough.
00:38:07You ready?
00:38:17Come on.
00:38:21And the shit, like the gazelles and shit.
00:38:24Hear them motherfuckers.
00:38:25They be eating and hear them just start running.
00:38:28They don't even look.
00:38:28Run!
00:38:30and the motherfucker that can't hear is in trouble, what? Cheetah, huh? Cheetah, what? Cheetah, what'd you say? It's your
00:38:46ass, I got you, I saw one of them gazelles though make a move on a cheetah, it was embarrassing,
00:38:53the cheetah got pissed off too, because he's ready to get the gazelle, the gazelle said
00:38:59and that motherfucker fell 400 yards trying to stop and got up, I'm gonna get you motherfucker, make me look
00:39:07bad
00:39:12we picked up a hitchhiker one day, African man got in the car and he had that odor, you know,
00:39:19I mean this motherfucker had, oh dear
00:39:23and he was, he was in the car, you be driving, that odor was, motherfucker was, yep
00:39:29whooping you all up and
00:39:30whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop
00:39:36And he lean over the point
00:39:38Hey, mocha way
00:39:41whoop, whoop
00:39:44and you be, you know me say God damn, I know my people, but God damn
00:39:55and I looked in the rearview mirror and this motherfucker was going oh shit that motherfucking
00:40:02cologne and shit they got on stinking motherfuckers boy I don't know how I can take this shit
00:40:09and he had his head out the window trying to get air he's just he's going god damn he just
00:40:15ended up
00:40:15making her stop let me out this motherfucker I'll walk fuck it you motherfuckers stink it's my ass
00:40:31one thing I got out of it was magic I'd like to share with you you know it's like
00:40:35I was leaving and I was sitting in the hotel and a voice said to me said look around what
00:40:41do you see
00:40:43and I said I see all colors of people doing everything you know and the voice said do you
00:40:49see any niggas I said no I said you know why because there aren't any and it hit me like
00:41:01a shot man I
00:41:02started crying and shit I was sitting there I said yeah I've been here three weeks I haven't even said
00:41:07it I haven't even thought it and it made me say oh my god I've been wrong I've been wrong
00:41:15I got to
00:41:16regroup my shit I mean I said I ain't gonna never call another black man a nigger
00:41:26you know because we never was no niggas that's a word that's used to describe our own wretchedness
00:41:32and we perpetuate it now because it's dead that word is dead we men and women we come from we
00:41:40come
00:41:40from the first people on the earth you know the first people on the earth were black people because
00:41:49anthropologists white anthropologists so the white people go that could be true you know
00:41:58yeah dr leaky and them found people remains five million years ago in Africa you know them
00:42:05motherfuckers didn't speak French so black people we the first people had thought right we the first
00:42:13one to say where the fuck am I and how do you get to Detroit so you can take it
00:42:28for what it's worth I
00:42:29know like I ain't trying to preach nothing I'm just talking about my feelings about and I don't want them
00:42:33hip white people coming to me calling me no nigger or telling me nigger jokes I don't like it I'm
00:42:40just
00:42:40telling you it's uncomfortable to me I don't like it when black people say it to me I really don't
00:42:45no more it's nothing it don't mean nothing so I love y'all and you take that with you I
00:42:50guess y'all
00:42:50say
00:43:02I think the only brave thing I might have ever done in my life was once I worked at a
00:43:08mafia nightclub
00:43:11in Youngstown Ohio I was 19 I was 19 years old right and I didn't know shit about the mafia
00:43:20my father was the baddest motherfucker I'd ever seen so the mafia didn't mean shit to me I did not
00:43:28relate to the mafia and I worked with this lady satin doll she was the star of the show beautiful
00:43:34black stripper right because usually in those days they had like in clubs had a singer and a stripper
00:43:41and MC I was MC and she was the first black star I ever met satin doll yeah cause Duke
00:43:47Ellington had
00:43:47written a tune about her you know that's what she used to dance to an act she was beautiful she
00:43:52was 60
00:43:52then oh this bitch was fine no man I'm not lying Lena Horne didn't have shit on her and she
00:44:01was crying
00:44:01backstage you know I gotta get to Buffalo they won't pay me they said who won't pay you club owners
00:44:08well I said oh that mother gonna pay me bet bet and I this is how ignorant I was I
00:44:16had a cap pistol
00:44:20you know them blank starter pistols I busted into the office with this motherfucker in my all right
00:44:25I ain't giving the money motherfucker doing my best black shit you know you know that shit usually scare whitey
00:44:34to death
00:44:40and these motherfuckers didn't do nothing and I'm sure that those men are sitting in that room today laughing
00:44:50because that's what this dude he just started laughing
00:44:55this fucking kid
00:44:58hey wait a minute hey Tony come here
00:45:02wait a minute Rich do the gun again
00:45:04hey Tony come here stick up
00:45:09this fucking kid come here come here
00:45:14he's got a pair of goosies on him
00:45:16come on
00:45:17fucking dick come here
00:45:18they like to hug you and rub you
00:45:21come here fucker
00:45:23and grab your face you got the mononos in there
00:45:26huh
00:45:27this fucking kid got some boosies
00:45:29hey mononos
00:45:29and they always say shit you don't understand
00:45:32they're like
00:45:33hey you want a little cuisine for the win
00:45:36hey Paulo fix him a little mononos out of here
00:45:39put some struzzy on
00:45:40oh
00:45:41fry it up they like fried fruits
00:45:47fucking kid
00:45:48fucking kid
00:45:48ah he come in there
00:45:49he come in there
00:45:50he had a gun
00:45:51fucking kid
00:45:51ah
00:45:52ah
00:45:55pay everybody off
00:45:56pay them off
00:45:57it's alright
00:45:57they're gonna have time
00:45:58they paid everybody off
00:46:00let everybody go and kept me
00:46:03like a pep
00:46:05I'm fucking like this
00:46:06you're just fucking
00:46:09you got family
00:46:10well you got family now
00:46:14who is it
00:46:15come on
00:46:15tell him I call him back
00:46:17tell him it's a stick up
00:46:18ah
00:46:23and these motherfuckers start telling murder stories
00:46:26hey you remember when
00:46:27who's he
00:46:27hey you remember when I made my fucking bones
00:46:29huh
00:46:30me I had to go in
00:46:31it was Cleveland right
00:46:32fucking teamster
00:46:34big mouth hurt a lot of people right
00:46:36you know ice pig's my thing rich
00:46:39so we're fucking at the dry down
00:46:41me
00:46:42Johnny salami
00:46:45the Cabuzo brothers
00:46:48they're on the funeral parlor
00:46:49you carry we bury
00:46:51hahaha
00:46:54come here you fucking kid
00:46:57so we take this jerk off our bone
00:47:00you know
00:47:01drive him around
00:47:02get him a few drinks say hey let's get some bras right a little motel we had set up remember
00:47:07the
00:47:07johnny so we take him around he gets kind of stoned drops his glass i say now i pop him
00:47:15with the
00:47:15fucking ice pick right i'm popping this cocksucker blood squirting every what you wait i'm stabbed
00:47:22he's oh god don't kill me oh fuck you you guinea cocksucker and the fucking ice pick breaks
00:47:32i'm standing there with a piece of wood in my hand
00:47:37this is johnny salami what do i do johnny says wait till it melts asshole
00:47:45those were the good old days what's the matter rich you don't look so good
00:47:52hey it's pilo give me a little cnini bro you got a way home you want us to give you
00:47:56a ride
00:48:02don't go out with the mafia because you can't buy them dinner if the motherfuckers like they always
00:48:06like to take entertainers to dinner and they take you to dinner and they pick up the check all the
00:48:11time right and if you get mad you know you say let me buy the check tonight god damn it
00:48:16you guys buy me
00:48:16dinner every night hey the kid let me tell you something we're crime and crime don't pay
00:48:31the mafia people are weird people because they appeal
00:48:44they appeal to your intellect they do the motherfuckers appeal said you're intelligent
00:48:50person aren't you and you realize that it's very difficult to walk without knees
00:49:03and one time i was in a room with one of these motherfuckers and i don't know how to describe
00:49:08you ever seen a face just turned to stone i mean i was talking to the man and somebody was
00:49:15over here
00:49:16talking about something that had pissed him off that he was going to deal with and it went from a
00:49:20nice
00:49:20conversation with me and a stone thing came over his face was like and a chill went through my
00:49:26fucking body it was i said this motherfucker's dead i'm looking at a dead man that walks around
00:49:36because it was just stone man it wasn't no compromise there was nothing in there where you could go
00:49:45it wasn't none of that in the face and that's it boy that's a look i'd like to get just
00:49:49to whoop on a
00:49:50motherfucker you know just say what remember that in the godfather i mean that to me was the most
00:49:59chilling line in the world when the guy said hey can you let me off just for old time's sake
00:50:04the guy said
00:50:10well that had to be the coldest shit in the world because the mother said and you got to get
00:50:14in the
00:50:15car with him then you got to beg some more in the car you know i mean you ain't gonna
00:50:20stop begging you
00:50:21know that the mother long's got breath in his body you get in the car he's talking about hey jeff
00:50:25i
00:50:25remember when i showed you how to drive
00:50:40no italian people got all italian people are not in the mafia whether you believe it or not
00:50:45they're not really most of them work for the mafia but they're all not
00:50:58what do what
00:51:08all right this is a this is the last time mudbone will be seen anyway
00:51:21this is mudbone's last show right this is
00:51:29ladies and gentlemen from tupelo mississippi mudbone
00:51:42you know
00:51:45now i know that boy
00:51:50see he fucked up
00:51:53gee that fire got on his ass
00:51:58and he fucked him up upstairs fried up what little brains he had
00:52:08because i remember the motherfucker
00:52:11he could make a motherfucker laugh at a funeral on sunday christmas day
00:52:21but you know what happened he got some money that's what happened to him he got some money
00:52:27then mr mill cramps and shit was gone he said fuck it went all the way crazy
00:52:34shit now me i'm still hungry
00:52:38see i'm gonna be out here four days and six months
00:52:41i watched this boy because he used to come by and leave me a dollar here 50 cents down
00:52:49he was all right you know he would never leave me five though you know
00:52:53but he let me have them tools and fuels you know
00:52:58so i felt for the boy i went over there talking to him
00:53:02and he's ignorant because i sit down and talk to him and he don't let him get none of that
00:53:07powder in his nose
00:53:11that's like trying to talk to a baboon there
00:53:15i talked to the boy seven days and seven nights
00:53:20he was still on the same subject
00:53:25where can i get some more
00:53:32so i talked to him you know i said boy
00:53:35why don't you do something with yourself
00:53:37i said since religion ain't your thing maybe you take up ballet
00:53:47so
00:53:50makes me laugh think about it
00:53:54i told him i said because you're going to be black a long time
00:53:59so you might as well enjoy yourself because there ain't many black out there doing it
00:54:05i said don't stop now said don't lighten up tighten up
00:54:10that's what i told him and he must have listened to me
00:54:15because he was going to register the vote i knew he was sick then
00:54:26so listen
00:54:29i am not going to steal the show from the boy
00:54:33i ain't gonna do that time so i'm on the boy i got the camera and working seat and only
00:54:39white folks can do that
00:54:45and they make it look like such a mystery they never let no black people do no shit like
00:54:51only time you see black people doing some of that shit is when they want to plug plugged in
00:54:56say say boy plug that in
00:55:01that's how he be saying i'm i works on the camera crew see what you doing plug in the thing
00:55:07shit said monkey could do that guess that's why they hired him
00:55:13see i lived through hard times before like people come about these as hard times
00:55:19hard times hard times was way back and it was they didn't even have a year before i just called
00:55:26it hard times
00:55:36it was dark all the time i think the sun came out on wednesday
00:55:42and if you didn't have your ass up early you missed it
00:55:50so i happened to be out there one wednesday and the sun hit me right in the face and i
00:55:55grabbed a
00:55:56bunch of it rubbed it all over myself
00:55:59oh shit i didn't have nothing else said shit it might as well have some sun on my face
00:56:06and time went on i remember there was third day i said damn that son was a bitch
00:56:14that's why they didn't want us to have none of it
00:56:17because it'd cheer you up inside you see so i got all chilled up went out on the day
00:56:27lucinda belle may
00:56:31girl was pretty cold black skin skin was tender like a baby's butt
00:56:41sweet breast smelled like carnation milk that's how tender she was
00:56:50i liked her too beauty she had a little liking to me
00:56:54so lucinda we'd have to tip away we'd go up do a little kissing up in alpha i should
00:57:00we tip away together on wednesday morning when the sun was up because we get up there i make her
00:57:07put a
00:57:07little on her face and she relaxed then she relaxed i start rubbing all over
00:57:16women like when you rub on if you rub them in them right spots
00:57:21you got to rub them right there
00:57:25right on the inside of the leg by the kneecap rub them right there and you rub it around till
00:57:30it
00:57:30start burning should they open up anymore
00:57:40because there ain't but two pieces of pussy you're gonna get in your life
00:57:43that's your first and your last
00:57:51and all that in between don't count
00:57:55that's just the extra gravy you see
00:57:58your mother said when's the last time you got in business yesterday
00:58:02that's as far as i want to remember it
00:58:05i don't want to sit around the mother fucker ask me so how long you have in a pussy i
00:58:08go
00:58:15i don't want to live that long
00:58:21so what i'm saying what the point i'm trying to make is that there is no point to be made
00:58:28that's all that is there ain't no point to it because you didn't ask to come to this
00:58:33mother fucker and you sure can't choose how to leave because you don't know when you're gonna go
00:58:39so don't take this shit set you better have some fun and plenty of it
00:58:44because when the shit over and you ask for a recharge it's too late
00:58:50so all i can say is keep some sunshine on your face
00:59:03i was up in oakland with some old friends i mean mother fuckers i know a long time like
00:59:11and i have changed as a person inside right and there was an old dope dealer
00:59:16mother fucker used to i used to follow him around for dope
00:59:23and and i never always paid him but i was always like on credit or something and the
00:59:28mother fucker and the mother fucker act like i was one of his pets
00:59:34and i start saying wait mother fucker i paid for the dope
00:59:39i didn't live at your house and all that shit i had my own apartment
00:59:43but he was acting like i was one of his bitches and then he got real
00:59:47you know he got real mad because i fired on his ass you know i said
00:59:51i say no mother fucker i was never like that
00:59:55well yeah and i had my shirt off and i was sitting on the couch and all of a sudden
01:00:02he says about
01:00:02you know when you signify him up i'll get vicious and say well what about them burn up rings around
01:00:07your neck mother fucker
01:00:10and it hit me because i had never thought of myself like that you know because i said yeah i've
01:00:16been
01:00:16burned up
01:00:25no it never had hit me like like it hit him you know i said yeah i've been burnt the
01:00:31fuck up because most people i meet i act like i ain't burn up they do too
01:00:39mother fucker sneaker peek be done
01:00:49there's a nice tattoo you have all over your body
01:00:57i guess y'all say fuck all that how'd you burn up
01:01:09how'd you burn up in your own house mother fucker
01:01:15i know y'all done heard all kind of stories about how i burned up basin this and uh ether
01:01:20that and
01:01:21none of that got nothing to do that's not true i'm going to tell you all the truth tonight okay
01:01:30you got a promise not to tell nobody
01:01:34can i trust you do some lying
01:01:38all right now all my friends know this to be true because everybody knows me
01:01:47like usually before i go to bed i have milk and cookies
01:01:54and one night i had some low-fat milk and some uh pasteurized and i mixed them together
01:02:02and i dipped my cookie and the blew up
01:02:18i mean the damnedest thing i've ever heard of in my life medical history was made
01:02:27a lot of people say i i think about it i said why do people think i'm gonna listen to
01:02:33me all the
01:02:33people you ever heard of free basin have you ever heard of anybody blowing up
01:02:39why me 10 million motherfuckers free base i gotta blow up
01:02:52i'm talking about it started out i started out smoking free bases it was like
01:02:56i started out one time
01:03:00and i should have known something bad was gonna happen because i remember the first time i did free
01:03:07base i burnt my bed up
01:03:12i swear i was sitting on the side of the bed and somebody said richard the bed's on fire i
01:03:17said what
01:03:26it's a weird disease if any of you people out there doing it i know you ain't gonna believe this
01:03:30but
01:03:30if you've been doing it longer than two weeks you're a junkie i'm telling you and now i'm telling you
01:03:37so
01:03:37you'll know it and i know you'll tell yourself i ain't no fucking junkie nothing hooked me but you
01:03:42cannot stop if you wanted to you'll go home tonight and say watch me you will not be able to
01:03:47if you
01:03:48got the there you will do it i'm talking about i started out smoking i would have a pipe and
01:03:54sit it
01:03:55down and walk eight feet away from the mountain
01:04:04two days later jack i would smoke i go
01:04:19one time it looked like i had an appendage on my hand was a pipe
01:04:24because this pipe used to tell me when to go to bed
01:04:28pipe would say time to get up time for some smoke rich
01:04:33come on now we're not going to do anything today all your appointments me and you just
01:04:37gonna hang out in this room together
01:04:43and i'd get mad and frustrated people didn't understand me the pipe say come on in the room
01:04:48with me i got you covered i know how you feel rich i understand just light me up hold me
01:04:55for a couple of
01:04:56days we'll talk it over
01:04:59i'm talking about a year later jack i'm talking about
01:05:05i'm drawn up up and out of my mind but i'm not hooked
01:05:11and people trying to help me i say you're just meddling in my motherfucking business
01:05:17do you just think because i'm having a good leave me the alone
01:05:22when i'm smoking my shit because my pipe would say i understand rich they don't know it
01:05:28it's your life why they don't have a right to with you
01:05:32where were they when you needed them come on in here with me because i love you
01:05:43and then the pipe starts saying shit like you let me get a little low yesterday
01:05:50i don't like that now don't let me get low again or i'm gonna hurt you
01:05:56you promise keep me full at all times okay come on rich you can do it
01:06:02because i understand and finally people dope dealers i did it so bad dope dealers tried not
01:06:08to sell me nothing now that's doing it where dope dealers say man i ain't gonna give you no more
01:06:13of
01:06:13that shit i'm sorry brother i can't see you do it to yourself now that's dope dealers don't give a
01:06:18fuck about nothing usually people think these motherfuckers refuse to sell me cocaine
01:06:23say no motherfucker you killing yourself what man i don't want to see you fuck yourself up
01:06:31now i ain't never heard of dope dealers doing that
01:06:35i mean you could sooner get free food in a chinese restaurant
01:06:42but these motherfuckers love me man they say no man then you just snort again
01:06:47and i'd lie and say okay i'm gonna snort just give me enough for the weekend
01:06:53i'm gonna snort how much you want a kilo
01:06:59now i don't know i'm a junkie i weigh about 103. i look like
01:07:08ain't been out my room in eight weeks funk is my shadow
01:07:14funk be just hanging all over me talking about hey don't wash
01:07:22then finally my old lady called jim brown up jim gonna come over and tell you fuck jim brown
01:07:29i'll show jim brown i'm the man i don't give a fuck uh nobody afraid of jim brown here
01:07:35jim was coming in the driveway i got all nervous jingling where's it jim brown oh
01:07:40shit let me get this this ain't gonna scare me let me get my pipe pipe said come on rich
01:07:44me and
01:07:44you will show jim don't worry about it shit jim don't scare nobody that's right rich jim come
01:07:50in the room i start smoking hey jim how you doing bro and jim had psychology jim go want to
01:08:02go roller
01:08:13skating
01:08:16pipe maybe you want to go for a ride
01:08:36jim say what you gonna do so what do you mean what you gonna do about that shit
01:08:48what um i'm doing what i want to do
01:08:54you know i ain't afraid of you you know you ain't no movie star to me i ain't scared of
01:09:00you
01:09:00motherfucker i'm your friend what you gonna do you gonna get well or you gonna end our friendship
01:09:09what you gonna do the pipe said don't listen
01:09:16you trying to with you rich jim i am a man there ain't no doubt about that but what you
01:09:28gonna do
01:09:30and jim kept saying that to me all through the hall what you gonna do leave me the alone
01:09:36that's what i'm gonna do i'm getting the away from you so i don't have to hear what you gonna
01:09:42do
01:09:43because i don't know what the fuck i'm gonna do now leave me the fuck alone what you gonna do
01:09:53so jim almost got me to the hospital but he had to go somewhere like to home to eat
01:10:02and i was in the room with the pipe and the pipe said hey rich jim's gone
01:10:11and it don't matter how many times you break them motherfuckers you go out and buy a new one
01:10:16i'm talking about it's an addiction it's a monster it's pitiful because i end up on the floor looking
01:10:22for shit at my house no matter well let me smoke this
01:10:29and be a piece of log or anything right so wonder how my sleeve would taste
01:10:37well i'll tell you one thing man when that fire hits your ass that will sober your ass up quick
01:10:46i mean i was standing there on fire and something said why that's so pretty blue
01:10:54you you know what that looks like fire i'm talking about fire is inspirational
01:11:04they should use it in the olympics because i did the hundred yard dash in four three
01:11:14and you know something i found out when you're on fire and running down the street people will get out
01:11:21of
01:11:21your way
01:11:24except for one old drunk right he's going hey buddy can i get a light
01:11:30oh how about just a little off the sleeve okay
01:11:32okay and you can tell when you fucked up man when you get to the hospital and the doctor go
01:11:42holy shit why don't we get some coleslaw and serve this up
01:11:54i was laying there in the hospital with tubes and shit up my nose had an iv in my arm
01:12:00and a brother
01:12:01come in wanting a autograph i mean steam and shit was still coming off me right
01:12:10brother come in hey rich hey home
01:12:19can i get this autograph come on rich let me have this last autograph
01:12:36and jim was in the hospital with me every day when i was getting well he'd be there every day
01:12:41because jim fired on me and shit and jim you know fire jumped on jim once he said hey
01:12:50and jim would be there with me giving me strength because i look at jim i said jim ain't never
01:12:54been
01:12:54hurt so i can't show no pain i gotta show my strength try to get well and i was doing
01:12:58real good
01:12:59because nature is wonderful when i when you burn up your skin goes to sleep because nature said i
01:13:05can't deal with it and just goes to sleep and so you don't feel for about three days till your
01:13:12nerves wake up i didn't know that i figured i ain't feeling nothing everything's fine and at the
01:13:19hospital like the doctors and shit they're really great but there was a brother worked a nurse
01:13:23they're unique people work with burnt people because i don't know if i could work with no
01:13:27motherfucker burn up you know what i mean put some butter on him and say that's it
01:13:36go for what you know home but these motherfuckers man they and this larry murphy used to come in
01:13:42we're gonna wash you rich and we're gonna wash you down and you're gonna feel great we're gonna wash
01:13:46you wash you he kept saying it i said yeah we're gonna put you in the tub and watch it
01:13:50say yeah you're gonna wash me when you're gonna wash me we're gonna wash you in a couple of days
01:13:54rich and just don't worry we're gonna get you better yeah motherfucker yeah wash me will you please
01:13:59and i should have known something was wrong because this motherfucker come every day with
01:14:03this don't worry now we're gonna put you in the tub and it's gonna be all right don't worry i
01:14:08said
01:14:08i'm not worried motherfucker put my ass in the tub you don't wash me come on now don't worry
01:14:17third day are you all right now the day we're gonna put you in the yeah larry you're gonna wash
01:14:20my ass in the tub okay god damn and they take you in the room and they get you down
01:14:28in the tub of
01:14:28solution and you sit in the tub yeah yeah tub right gonna wash i know he said you feel this
01:14:35it's a sponge i said it's a sponge motherfuckers oh wash my ass all right put your arms up open
01:14:42up
01:14:42because i'm gonna wash me mother my girl he said now it's time to wash you ready i said yeah
01:14:47mother said
01:15:17don't don't don't wash me no more not even my little finger no no no no you will not
01:15:31don't you wash a motherfucking thing i don't want you to touch my finger
01:15:37i don't want you to do a goddamn thing to me don't wash me no motherfucking more
01:15:47and if you do i'll bite you you motherfucking don't you wash me anymore i don't care if i die
01:15:56don't you wash me no more but they were wonderful man they
01:16:09pain sure stops racism quick what no color in there except burn up motherfuckers
01:16:15and we all got religious you can you find god quick when they find your ass dead
01:16:27i was watching tv one night and they said i had died
01:16:31i was bandaged up and shit and they said richard prior died five minutes ago
01:16:46but i i thank god every day jack i do i say god thank you for not burning my dick
01:16:55because most people said you've been punished by god i say no if god wanted to punish my ass
01:17:03he'd have burnt my dick now that's some punishment because when that fire hit my ass my dick went to
01:17:10me and my chest was hollering to help the dick said fuck dude over yourself i'm protecting the balls spit
01:17:34you got a light match
01:17:36thank you
01:17:45say watch out
01:17:49mm-hmm listen y'all
01:17:54have been wonderful to to come and share this with us and i thank everyone connected with
01:18:08it's been a pleasure for me to do this and get up here and i thank you very much i
01:18:13want to say y'all
01:18:14gave me a lot of love when i was not feeling well and y'all really i appreciate it also
01:18:20y'all did some
01:18:29nasty ass jokes on my ass too oh yeah y'all didn't think i saw some of these motherfuckers since
01:18:36you
01:18:36love me so much i remember this one it's straight to match like this you know what's that richard
01:18:41prior running down the street
01:19:11what you want
01:19:12just a little bit
01:19:14just a little bit
01:19:47just a little bit
01:19:55just a little bit
01:19:58just a little bit
01:20:30just a little bit
01:20:35r-e-s-b-e-c-t
01:20:37burn out what it means to me
01:20:39r-e-s-b-e-c-t
01:20:42take out t-c-p
01:20:44suck it to me
01:20:45suck it to me
01:20:45suck it to me
01:20:45suck it to me
01:20:45let it rip
01:20:46let it rip
01:20:48let it rip
01:20:48oh hey
01:20:49let it rip
01:20:50just a little bit
01:20:52i get tired
01:20:53just a little bit
01:20:54keep on trying
01:20:55just a little bit
01:20:56you're running out of food
01:20:57just a little bit
01:20:58and i ain't lying
01:20:59just a little bit
01:21:00please stop
01:21:01when you come home
01:21:04are you my walking
01:21:05and find out a lot
01:21:07just a little bit
01:21:08i got tired
01:21:09just a little bit
01:21:10just a little bit
01:21:11just a little bit
01:21:11just a little bit
01:21:11just a little bit
01:21:11just a little bit
01:21:11just a little bit
01:21:11just a little bit
01:21:11just a little bit
01:21:11just a little bit
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