- 7 hours ago
Your Friends and Neighbors S01E01
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TVTranscript
00:22Oh, Jesus.
00:30Oh!
01:09Oh!
01:14Oh!
01:14Oh!
01:15Oh!
01:15Uh!
01:23Oh!
01:26Oh!
01:27Oh!
01:28Oh!
01:28Oh!
01:29Oh!
01:32I know what you're thinking. The pool is a metaphor.
01:36But it was also very fucking real and very fucking cold.
01:40I wasn't generally the kind of guy who did a lot of introspection.
01:43Of course, until very recently, I wasn't the kind of guy who woke up on the floor of someone else's
01:48house
01:48covered in a dead guy's blood before falling into the pool.
01:51But here we are.
01:52And at that moment, I couldn't help but catch a fleeting glimpse out of the corner of my eye
01:58of the swirling hot mess of my life
02:00and wonder how the hell everything could go so wrong so fast.
02:08This is what happens.
02:13Oi, come on.
02:15Shots, shots, shots.
02:16Yeah, bartender, what shots do you want?
02:20What is she drinking? Let's have some of that.
02:22Yeah, that looks nice.
02:23That's pretty nice.
02:24What do you want?
02:25Get you something?
02:25Big fucking promotion.
02:28How much did he make?
02:29How much did you make?
02:37McAllen, $25.
02:39Bartender took me off.
02:41It's an expensive drink.
02:42I hope I'm worth it.
02:43Don't worry.
02:44You're buying.
02:46Liv Cross.
02:47Andrew Cooper.
02:48I know.
02:48I work at Mike Shepard's Group.
02:50Oh, I'm sorry.
02:50I didn't recognize you.
02:52It's fine.
02:52Mike doesn't let us go above the seventh floor very often.
02:56The Patrick Bateman fanboys over there were getting a little wild.
02:59I thought it might be better if I looked occupied.
03:01Happy to help.
03:02For a minute there, it looked like you were going to come over to me, but I got impatient.
03:06Yeah, well, I'm recently single for the first time in quite a while, so I'm afraid I don't
03:12have much game.
03:12You're saying you have no game.
03:14That's your game.
03:15It's pretty weak.
03:16See what I mean?
03:17You were married?
03:18Yeah, 18 years.
03:20That would make you...
03:21Far too old for you.
03:22I don't really see age that way.
03:24That's because you're what, 27?
03:2528.
03:26And that's your game.
03:28Maybe.
03:29Or maybe you've been wrapped up in the conventions of marriage and children for so long, living
03:35amongst other married people with children that you haven't considered that there may
03:39be an entire segment of the population who make different choices and have different
03:42goals.
03:44So what are your goals?
03:46Uh, lasting love, hot, healthy sex, financial comfort, peace of mind, harmony.
03:52I think those are everybody's goals.
03:53And how many of them have you achieved?
03:56I'm just saying maybe you should rethink the rules a little bit.
04:00That could be your father.
04:02I have one already.
04:03Milt.
04:04Good guy.
04:04I'm quite a bit older than you.
04:06Stranger than that.
04:07Feels like a win.
04:08Then you need to get out more.
04:09I'm out.
04:10Right now.
04:11No, you're not.
04:12Not really.
04:13Not yet.
04:14I'm sorry.
04:14Do you talk to everybody like this?
04:16You didn't ask me if I've been married.
04:18Have you been married?
04:19Yes.
04:19Two years.
04:20Well, you were too young.
04:21I was.
04:23Also, it turned out he liked fat hookers.
04:25Different strokes.
04:26The irony is I was morbidly obese as a teenager, but that was long before he met me.
04:31Still, after I happened upon his browsing history, I did wonder if he'd somehow sensed the
04:35fat girl in me when we met, and that's what drew him to me.
04:38Trust me, that's not what drew him to you.
04:41But where's that game of yours?
04:46Oh, look.
04:49I get that, by and large, guys your age are idiots, whatever that is over there, swinging
04:57their whiskey dicks around, narcissistic manboys far out of their depths with you in conversation
05:03and in bed.
05:04So, by comparison, man my age looks like the perfect antidote, right?
05:08I'm thoughtful, I'm wise, I'm more of a man, whatever the fuck that means these days.
05:12But you're 27?
05:1328.
05:1428, so you're 20 years younger than me.
05:15And at this moment in time, it works, right?
05:18I have money, you have freedom, we could travel the world together, we could learn things
05:22from each other.
05:23Conversation on in bed.
05:24Yeah, right.
05:26You'll find me very interesting, because I have two decades more worth of stories than
05:29you, and I find you very interesting, because you live your life in the moment with kind
05:32of a reckless immediacy that I lost a million years ago.
05:36So we'll have no trouble keeping each other entertained, and that'll work for a while,
05:40right?
05:42Then, skip ahead 10 years, you'll be 38, I'll be 58.
05:45That's when things can start to get a little shaky.
05:47You might want kids, I already have them.
05:49You might start thinking, oh, have I missed out on one of life's great experiences, and
05:53you'll still be stunning.
05:54You think I'm stunning?
05:55I'll be aging.
05:56Well, I can tell you're going to age very well.
05:58You can tell that because it's already started to happen.
06:00The point is that we'll have less sex and more wine, and maybe that'll still work for
06:04a time.
06:05Has anyone ever told you that you talk a lot?
06:07Well, I misplaced my inner monologue and my wife right around the same time.
06:11Anyway, let's skip ahead another 10 years.
06:13Must we?
06:14I'll be 68 years old, no matter how well I take care of myself.
06:18My prostate's going to do what it does, and so will my hair, and you'll start spending
06:21your days thinking about what your life looks like after I kick it.
06:24Meanwhile, every time you leave the house, I'll wonder what young stud you'll be fucking.
06:30Really?
06:31Are you that insecure?
06:32Well, not yet, but I will be.
06:33What about character?
06:34Yours or mine?
06:35You're so sure I'll cheat?
06:36No, I'm just sure I'll worry about it.
06:38You have this very strange mix of confidence and low self-esteem.
06:41So, I'll be the jealous old troll, and you'll be a restless woman in her sexual prime, and
06:45we'll both be consumed by this nagging fear that the last years of our life, the toughest
06:49ones, will be spent completely and utterly alone.
06:52Wow.
06:53Wow.
06:53Just wow.
06:55When did you come up with all of that?
06:57Oh, in the ten seconds it took you to walk from that stool to this one.
07:02Well, I could sit here and offer a full-throated rebuttal, but honestly, man, I was just looking
07:07to get laid.
07:08How many problems do you have with that?
07:14None come to mind.
07:19How many problems do you have to deal with that?
07:53this is what happens
08:01you land a job right out of college at a major firm
08:03you're just another cog in a very large wheel
08:06but you've got your foot in the door
08:09you get a shitty apartment in the city that you can barely afford
08:12because you know the money will come
08:13you get married because you know
08:18and she moves into that shitty apartment
08:22you're dead broke but there's two of you now
08:24you're in it together and that feels good
08:29side note
08:30no one will ever fuck you the way she did in that shitty apartment
08:35including her
08:39so you work your asses off and you dig yourselves out
08:41hardest easiest money you'll ever make
08:43well it's not exactly canned food and shotguns
08:47hey
08:48oh yeah
08:51and then when you're feeling good about things
08:52when things are you know copacetic
08:54you have the first kit
09:00you buy a house 30% down
09:0230 year jumbo at four and a half percent
09:03and you're broke again
09:09so you work harder longer hours
09:11you start earning some big bucks
09:13which only serves to make you aware of the even bigger bucks you could be earning
09:18kid number two
09:20house number two
09:22broke again
09:27but it's a different kind of broke
09:29you're leveraged
09:30which is a fancy way of saying you've got something to show for your efforts
09:33the house
09:34the cars
09:35the stuff
09:38and by now you've lost sight of whatever naive plans you may have once had
09:42or the things that mattered to you when you were starting out
09:44you're moving too fast to ask yourself those hard questions
09:47like when is it enough
09:49and really what's the point of all this shit
09:56house number three
10:02then one day about five years after you bought the place
10:05you look up and realize that you've gotten there
10:07to that hallowed plateau
10:08where for the first time you can actually afford your own life
10:11and in that mystical nexus where you seem to have wrangled life
10:14and all of its infinitely complex challenges into submission
10:17that's generally where you will find your wife of 18 years
10:20in your bed
10:23with one of your closest friends
10:41house number four
10:42a rental
10:44it's small but don't worry
10:45it's also depressing
10:47the suburbs I
10:50I love the drive
10:53and you tell me you'll never survive
10:58grab your mother's keys
11:01we're leaving
11:12Sometimes I can't believe it
11:15I'm moving past the feeling
11:20Sometimes I can't believe it
11:21Why are we still holding Impact Pro?
11:23We're mostly out.
11:24Mostly. Did he really just say that?
11:26They're going to rebound.
11:27Guys, I've been telling you, we are making money across the book.
11:29We don't need to get dinged in emerging tech.
11:31Blow out of it today.
11:33You got it, boss.
11:35What's wrong with him?
11:36Me? Nothing.
11:38He got dumped.
11:38Oh, is that news?
11:40I love her, man.
11:41No, you don't. You love love. That's all.
11:44I just don't know what to do.
11:45I do. Blow out of Pack Pro.
11:50Morning, Coop.
11:51Jack.
11:52Gentlemen, we're on for squash today.
11:55Are we? Did Mary send me an email?
11:57Probably my mistake. Got your bag here?
11:59Yeah.
12:00Great.
12:00Noon.
12:01Noon.
12:02Excellent.
12:07Out, out. Come on, man. Put it in.
12:17Serve it.
12:18God damn it.
12:25Oh.
12:26Where are the kids?
12:28Oh, they're fine.
12:28Wife?
12:30Ex-wife.
12:30Yeah, she's still with the putts. What's his name? The basketball player?
12:34Nick.
12:35Yes.
12:36Yeah, he'll get his. Karma, right?
12:39Speaking of which, I gotta deliver some bad news.
12:41Jesus, Jack, the cancer's not back, is it?
12:44No, God, no. No, my sole remaining testicle is in good shape. There we go.
12:50No, the thing of it is, Coop, you're fired.
12:53Oh, great.
12:55Oh, great.
12:55No, I'm serious. I gotta let you go.
12:59What?
13:01This girl, Olivia, what's her name? Olivia or something.
13:04Hold on. Wait, girl? What, what girl? What are you talking about?
13:07Cross, Olivia Cross. Olivia Cross.
13:08Liv, Liv Cross?
13:11The managing director, sleeping with an associate.
13:14Wait a minute. No, she never worked under me. She was in Shepherd's Group. And I don't think I'd ever
13:19even met her before.
13:20It doesn't matter if you met her. It matters if you fucked her. You did fuck her, right?
13:26Fuck me.
13:28It was like a weekend. Like three months ago. Completely consensual. I mean, she came on to me.
13:33It's not the point. You were her superior.
13:36I told you. I didn't even know her.
13:39But you knew that you worked for Shepherd, right?
13:42You see, Coop, the thing is, in her mind, she was passed up for a VP slot.
13:46VP? She's 27 years old.
13:48No, she's 28. And I'm not here to litigate.
13:50You can't fire me, Jack.
13:52Well, we have a very strict, non-fraternizing clause, or so I'm told.
13:57Why the fuck did you bring me here to fire me?
14:02HR needed to get into your office to get your computer, proprietary information.
14:06Do you know the drill?
14:07Those are my clients.
14:08Well, according to the non-solicit you signed, they're ours for at least another two years.
14:13You're really gonna bury me like this?
14:15You know how this goes.
14:18My capital account?
14:20That's my money, Jack.
14:22No way. Come on, Jack. You were fired for a cause.
14:24You cannot do that. Everything I have is in that account. You destroy me, Jack.
14:28Sorry it has to be this way, but it has to be this way.
14:32I'll sue.
14:33They'll give you a six-month's draw if you don't.
14:36Fuck you.
14:40Well, I'll give you a few days to decide.
15:10You still do well.
15:12I was going to do well.
15:32Hold her out!
15:33Out!
15:47What are you doing here?
15:50Wrapped up a little early.
15:51Thought I'd come pick you up.
15:52It's not too sad.
15:54I know.
15:55I thought maybe we could hang out a little.
15:57Maybe go get some ice cream.
15:58Am I in trouble?
15:59Jesus, Hunter, no.
16:00Can't a father just spend some unscheduled quality time with his son?
16:23How's that tutor we got you?
16:24Is she working out?
16:26I guess.
16:29You got a girlfriend?
16:31No.
16:32Any prospects?
16:33No.
16:37You think at some point today you might respond to me with an answer longer than two syllables?
16:43Maybe.
17:00You're coming in?
17:02Yeah.
17:02Tori's here.
17:03I want to say hi.
17:05Hi, Bob.
17:06Hey, Mom.
17:07How was your day?
17:08Good.
17:13What are you doing here?
17:15I took Hunter for some ice cream.
17:17That's not Tuesday.
17:18So I've been told.
17:20Is Tori here?
17:21She's not home yet.
17:25What?
17:26What?
17:26What is the look?
17:28I don't give you any look.
17:29You are giving me the look that there's the look where you're trying not to give me a look.
17:32So what's the problem?
17:37I think it's a little tricky when you show up on a day that isn't your day.
17:40I took him out for ice cream.
17:42My God.
17:43It's confusing for him.
17:44Boundaries are there for a reason.
17:45Boundaries?
17:46You mean, like, monogamy?
17:48Really, Coop?
17:49It's been almost two years.
17:51When are you going to stop playing that card?
17:52I don't know.
17:52What is the statute of limitations on adultery?
17:55Probably less time than you've spent playing the sad cuckold.
17:59Who says cuckold?
18:00Who are you?
18:01If you were even remotely self-aware, you'd realize these things don't happen in a vacuum.
18:04And you could maybe take a little portion of responsibility for your side of it.
18:08Okay, I'm sorry, but you sleep with Nick.
18:10You kick me out of this place.
18:11I'm forced to pay for this entire mess, and I'm the one that's not being responsible.
18:15I'm not doing this right now.
18:17Oh, well, it's really no fun doing it alone.
18:20Oh, hey.
18:21What?
18:22Did he tell you he needs a new drum kit?
18:24He needs a new drum kit?
18:26What is wrong with his old one?
18:27I don't know.
18:28It's old and warped.
18:29This band he's playing with, and they're very good, by the way, said he needs a new one.
18:32Nick offered to pick one up.
18:34No, Nick doesn't need to pick up a drum set for my kid.
18:37I'm just saying, if you're really busy...
18:38I can handle it.
18:41Oh, wait.
18:42Goop.
18:43I took Tori to the dermatologist.
18:45Her skin is fine.
18:46Yeah, did you want to tell her that?
18:48She wants this new laser treatment.
18:50It's three times, and then you're done.
18:51$1,500 a pop.
18:54They're gonna email you the invoice.
18:55Every time I see you, it costs me money.
18:57Let's try sticking to Tuesdays.
19:01Tell Tori her father says hi.
19:06Jesus.
19:08Fucking Christ, are you fucking kidding me?
19:14Oh, shit.
19:15I'm sorry.
19:16That is totally my bad, man.
19:18Yeah, it was.
19:19Here, let me give you my info.
19:21Tori?
19:22Hi, Daddy.
19:24Jake, this is my father.
19:25Daddy, this is Jake.
19:28Pleasure to meet you, sir.
19:30I'm sorry I had to ding a car to do it.
19:32Wait, who are you?
19:34Jake Weston.
19:35Okay, that tells me nothing.
19:37He's my boyfriend.
19:38I'm sorry, how old are you?
19:40I'm 20, sir.
19:42Stop calling me sir.
19:43No one's buying it.
19:44Sorry.
19:45Okay, you're 20.
19:46She's 17.
19:47Are you familiar with the laws in this state?
19:49Daddy.
19:49It's not like that, sir.
19:50Jake, is it?
19:51If you call me sir one more time,
19:53I'm going to punch you in the dick.
19:54Dad, you're being crazy.
19:55Mom, Dad's being crazy.
19:56You're okay with this?
19:57Go inside and get something to eat.
19:58You know about this.
19:59You're fine with it.
20:00I'm sorry.
20:00Okay, fuck off, Jake.
20:02Fuck right off.
20:05What is your problem?
20:06What is your problem?
20:07You're okay with the statutory rape of our daughter.
20:10Please.
20:10I don't know what she's in love with him.
20:11She's a child.
20:12He's 20 years old.
20:13How is that okay in your world?
20:14Baby, leave them alone together.
20:16Great, Nick's here.
20:17Hi.
20:18Hey, cool.
20:19He'll solve it.
20:22Let me get out here to see this man.
20:25Hi.
20:26Oh, okay.
20:27Right, yeah.
20:28You know, I was about to grill up these terrific skirt steaks I just picked up.
20:32I mean, why don't you stick around?
20:36Why don't I stick around?
20:37Hmm.
20:37Uh, why don't I stick around?
20:40I guess why I don't stick around is probably because the idea of going into my backyard
20:44and eating steaks grilled on my $5,000 grill by the man who's fucking my wife would make
20:49me want to take my Shun Fuji steak knife and cut out my own heart.
20:54That's probably why I don't want to stick around.
20:56So, I'm going to go.
21:00I get it, Coop.
21:02I feel you, man.
21:03I really do.
21:03I'm just trying to find a way past this, you know, for all of us.
21:08Yeah, good luck with that.
21:10If you tell that little shit, I'm going to send him a bill.
21:14Watch your toes, baby.
21:28I drove all that night while Haskell slept like a log.
21:32After a while, I began to get sleepy myself.
21:36I was happy, though.
21:38Soon I'd be in the sewer.
21:40The long trip was practically over, and I'd be no more hooking it down the concrete.
21:44Oh.
21:47Which couldn't have been brighter if I'd embroidered it with neon lights.
21:51It was nice to think of Sue shooting to the top.
21:57Maybe it was for me, too.
21:59Don't you realize if I'm caught?
22:00I want to know where I got the car and stuff.
22:02They'll have me on a murder charge.
22:04You're smart, you won't get caught.
22:06I'm out of this way.
22:07Hey.
22:09What are you doing?
22:13Hi.
22:14Hi.
22:15Yeah!
22:16Fuck yeah!
22:17Come on!
22:18Samantha's husband, Paul, made his fortune in diners.
22:20He had nine of them, a 44-inch waist, and a serious case of erectile dysfunction.
22:25Yeah!
22:26God damn it!
22:27Since they separated, she'd been making up for lost time.
22:30Ow!
22:34Ow!
22:35Eh, cheers.
22:38Well, I think you actually broke the skin.
22:40Ah, well, that's how you know I wasn't faking it.
22:44Are you okay?
22:45Mm-hmm.
22:46Yeah.
22:49Do you have to go?
22:50Uh, no.
22:53Why, did you, did you want me to go?
22:55No, I just, you looked like you had something important.
23:00Eh, no.
23:02Um, okay.
23:04Okay.
23:06Hey, what, what, what just happened?
23:08What?
23:09Everything's perfect.
23:10No, if, if you have something you want to say, please just say it.
23:13I mean, you were just literally coming inside me a minute ago, and now you can't get rid
23:17of me fast enough.
23:17Oh, Sam, God.
23:19No, honestly, it's fine.
23:20No, it's fine.
23:20I'll go.
23:21Seriously, I mean, it's biology, right?
23:23The, uh, dopamine crash after the rush of Orcaz?
23:25I thought maybe something was going on with your kids.
23:27No, my kids are fast asleep, but thank you so much for your concern.
23:30Okay, look, maybe something's getting misconstrued here.
23:32I feel like you're not understanding me.
23:34No, it's just a little off-putting, if I'm being honest.
23:37I mean, because you called me, right?
23:40And then I changed into something sexy, and, like, got a sitter.
23:43And I exfoliated.
23:45Sam, Sam, Sam, I'm sorry.
23:48Okay?
23:49I don't want you to leave.
23:55Tell me the truth.
23:57Do you ever think that we could be something more than this?
24:04Sam.
24:06Come on.
24:20We'd been doing this on and off for half a year.
24:23And I had yet to stick the landing.
24:28Look, you know the kind of numbers I was doing over at Bailey, right?
24:31I could bring half that book over here.
24:33Combine that with the Texas oil families.
24:35I could be doing half a billion dollars in under a year.
24:37Come on.
24:37It's a win-win.
24:38And you haven't slept with any of her associates yet.
24:40Oh.
24:41Look, Jack's making calls.
24:42No one's allowed to date you.
24:43Come on, Monty.
24:44I got you this job.
24:45Just bring me in.
24:46He's making calls, man.
24:47Look, uh, I know Jack's been making calls.
24:49Fuck Jack.
24:50He's got no friends here.
24:52Ha-ha.
24:53That's good to know.
24:54Look, I can't afford to piss Jack off.
24:55Not now.
24:56Not with the beating we're taking in tech this year.
24:58I have been wanting to poach you for a while.
25:00Well.
25:00What's your non-solicit?
25:0190 days?
25:02You were once in this seat, Monty.
25:04And I was in yours.
25:05Yeah, I know.
25:06Two years.
25:07Didn't you get a lawyer look before you signed?
25:09Well, they made it worth my while.
25:10Can I say?
25:11You want my advice?
25:12Not really.
25:13Come on, Coop.
25:14You know I can't bring you in cold.
25:15Take some time off.
25:16You'll let the stink fade.
25:18Because no one's going to touch you right now.
25:19You should reach out to one of the new family offices.
25:21Coming out of Dubai.
25:22They won't give a shit about your non-solicit.
25:24or this thing with the girl.
25:25The girl wasn't a thing.
25:26They won't care either way is my point.
25:29Coop, come on.
25:31Don't be like that.
25:53Sorry I'm late.
25:54I got the usual.
25:58You're going to that Miller thing tomorrow?
26:01I was invited.
26:02Why wouldn't I?
26:03No reason.
26:05If I avoided every social situation because Mel and Nick might be there, I'd never leave the fucking house.
26:10Hey.
26:10I'm on team Coop.
26:12There's no teams.
26:14Bullshit.
26:21Okay.
26:22What's wrong?
26:23What?
26:25You're not checking your phone.
26:26You're not rushing through the mail.
26:27Something's up.
26:35What if I didn't work for a while?
26:39Why would you do that?
26:40I don't know.
26:41Maybe to see my kids.
26:42I don't know.
26:42Read a book.
26:44So we're talking a couple weeks.
26:46Maybe in line.
26:47Exactly.
26:48Earn like a year.
26:53Coop.
26:55There comes a time in every conversation when a man has to cut the shit and get to the fucking
26:58point.
27:01It was my job.
27:08Who'd you fuck?
27:09Hey, why would you automatically jump to the...
27:11No, no, no, no.
27:11You're not a drunk or a racist and your numbers were good.
27:14So that leaves fuckery.
27:15Jesus, Barney.
27:16Come on.
27:17I did that.
27:18I just don't understand why Jack would hang me out like that.
27:21I mean, it was borderline at best.
27:23Jack saw a way to cut you loose and keep your book.
27:25Was it really?
27:26Was what really?
27:27Borderline at best.
27:29Well, she worked on a completely different floor.
27:31I didn't even know her.
27:32She couldn't find someone else.
27:32Anyone else.
27:33She hit on me.
27:34That doesn't matter.
27:35It fucking should.
27:37It should.
27:38It should matter.
27:46Bailey will settle.
27:48What?
27:49Sue Bailey, Russell, they'll settle.
27:51Why would they do that?
27:52Because you're not a drunk or a racist and your numbers were good.
27:55They don't want this to go to a judge.
27:57Soon, then.
27:57You're my business manager, not my lawyer.
28:00And as your business manager, I'm strongly encouraging you to hire a lawyer.
28:03I just need to know how long I can float on what I got.
28:09You're not.
28:10You're not.
28:11Six months.
28:12Seven tops.
28:13If that can't be true.
28:14Alimony, child support, two houses, cars, private schools, not to mention your sister.
28:19And that's just off the top of my head.
28:22Jack will settle.
28:23Jack will crush me.
28:26I can't afford to go up against those guys.
28:27You can't afford not to.
28:32I just thought I had so much more.
28:36You did.
28:37And you got hammered last year in tech stuff.
28:39Everybody got hammered last year in tech.
28:41Everyone didn't get divorced.
28:43Or fuck the co-worker.
28:44You should go see Monty.
28:46I did.
28:46Lance, too.
28:48No dice?
28:50I have a two-year non-solicit.
28:55I know.
29:10Coop.
29:10What are you drinking?
29:13Forget that.
29:14I got a 15-year-old Japanese whiskey you gotta try.
29:16Two.
29:21Baha'i'm.
29:26How smooth is that, right?
29:29Yeah.
29:31So, um...
29:34How's a single life?
29:37Well...
29:39Has its moments.
29:40Bullshit.
29:41It's gotta be a goddamn smorgasbord of ass out there.
29:44Come on.
29:44Give me something.
29:45Some news from the front.
29:47Oh, hey.
29:48I'm, um...
29:49sharing that cancer benefit again this year.
29:51And I pounced you in for two tables.
29:52Same as last year.
29:53How much are the tables again?
29:5530 grand.
29:5564 the pair.
29:58Come on.
29:58You bought two tables last year.
29:59Yeah, well, I wasn't divorced last year, Peter.
30:04Hey, you're right.
30:05I'm sorry.
30:06I wasn't thinking.
30:08Shouldn't put you on the spot like that.
30:13I'll eat the tables and take your name off the list.
30:15Leave it on.
30:17You sure?
30:18Yeah, it's fine.
30:19It's fine.
30:20Wasn't trying to be an asshole.
30:23I guess to some people it just comes naturally.
30:26Fuck off.
30:33Hey, uh...
30:34That's okay, right?
30:37All adults here?
30:39Sure.
30:41It's all good.
30:42Good stuff.
30:5925, please.
31:01Yeah.
31:09Three-time NBA All-Star.
31:12What are you gonna do?
31:15Yeah.
31:18I have what he's having.
31:19Just more of it.
31:20You got it.
31:23Team Cope.
31:39And one more.
31:42So I said to Peter, do we have to get away with the kids, you know, while we still can
31:47before they want nothing to do with us, because then what are we going to do, talk to each
31:51other?
31:53We've been married way too long for that.
32:12So on Saturday, we leave before Belize, I found us this villa, stunning view of the coast.
32:19The kids have their own villa next door, so we're not on top of each other, you know, but we
32:23know we'll see them because we're the ones with the chef in the dining room, so when they get hungry.
32:28The maternal end does not know what is about to get away with the kids.
32:31How are you doing, Cope?
32:32Are you okay?
32:33Are you okay?
32:34I'm okay, Mel.
32:35How are you?
32:37Yeah.
32:41Hey, you two, can I just, can I just say, I love that you had such a friendly divorce.
32:47Diane.
32:48No, I'm just saying, no, I'm just saying, you know, remember when Mike and Gail got divorced?
32:51It was like Armageddon here.
32:53Do you remember that?
32:54They can't even be in the same room together.
32:55They can't be in the same city.
32:57Right?
32:59Sam, you think you and Paul are going to be able to keep things friendly?
33:02Oh, not a chance in hell, but thanks for asking, you know, in front of everyone like that.
33:07I just, I admire how you guys handled everything with class, you know, babe, when we get divorced.
33:13I think we should do it like that.
33:15That's it, I'm cutting you off.
33:19I think it's great.
33:24How we're all so enlightened.
33:27See?
33:28You know, I mean, Mel, yeah, Mel and Nick had an affair and ended our marriage, and I guess time
33:35will tell how fucked up our kids are going to be, but, you know, you all are being so awesome
33:40about the whole thing.
33:44If I'd have known.
33:54I'm going to go take a piss.
34:23I'm going to go take a piss.
34:36I'm going to go take a piss.
34:36I'm going to go take a piss.
34:42I'm going to go take a piss.
35:05Oops.
35:23Oops.
36:19You don't know how she was killed.
36:22I mean, the weapon.
36:23She was struck with a candlestick.
36:26A candlestick? Are you sure?
36:29A heavy silver one.
36:30How can you know?
36:32Microscope.
36:40Here.
36:43Just...
36:51What do you guys want to trade cars for a little while?
36:53Fuck yeah.
37:21What do you want to trade cars for a little while?
37:37What do you want to trade cars for a little while?
37:54Wow.
37:55Fuck!
37:55Jesus, what the... Daddy!
37:56Oh, for God's sake!
38:08Mr. Cooper!
38:09Go away, Jake.
38:11Sorry, sir.
38:12We didn't know you were gonna be here.
38:13I swear to God.
38:15Jake!
38:16What did you do?
38:17Oh, my God.
38:17I told you to stop calling me sir.
38:19Jake, are you okay?
38:21What the fuck is numb?
38:23I gotta take this.
38:24Dad!
38:24Hey.
38:25No, Bruce.
38:26I'm sorry.
38:27What?
38:28What can I do?
38:29What do you need?
38:30Oh, God, yeah.
38:31I mean, I can be there in ten minutes.
38:33Are you insane?
38:33Yeah.
38:34Sorry about this.
38:35Bye.
38:37Just put some ice on it or something.
38:38It'll be fun.
38:43Looks like the real thing.
38:49It tastes like the real thing.
38:56My fake plastic love.
39:05Hey, Bruce.
39:07Thanks for coming, Coop.
39:08You know what to do.
39:28Hey, Andy.
39:30Bruce called me.
39:31Yeah, I figured he would.
39:33I could use the ride home anyway.
39:35How did you get here?
39:37How did you get here?
39:37I walked.
39:38You off your meds again?
39:40I just wanted to feel something, you know?
39:43How you feel?
39:45Shitty, actually.
39:47How was your day?
39:49Oh.
39:49Uh, same.
39:51You don't look so great.
39:53That's coming from me.
39:54Come on.
39:55Let's get you home.
40:04He still loves me, you know.
40:06Honey, he's got a wife and two kids.
40:08Well, everybody's got something.
40:10What are we playing there?
40:11The Smashy Pumpkins?
40:12Um, Radiohead, dipshit.
40:16Right, right.
40:17Of course.
40:18Come on.
40:23Hey.
40:28You'll be all right.
40:33Yes.
40:34Get in.
40:37Your car?
40:39The loaner.
40:40Don't give me any shit.
40:56I'm in trouble, Allie.
40:59How bad?
41:02I might need you to give up the apartment and move back in with Mom and Dad.
41:07I guess that's for them.
41:11Yeah, well, if you don't take your meds.
41:13I make no promises.
41:17This car smells like ass.
41:18God, I know.
41:19It's like something tied in.
41:31You know, it's just time to call me next week about it.
41:34I've got a meeting instead, so I've got to go.
41:36I've got to go.
41:36I've got to go.
41:41I've got to go.
41:43Liv.
41:44Liv.
41:46Just, please, let me talk to you for a second.
41:48Look.
41:49Look, I'm really sorry about what happened to you.
41:51It sucks that they fired you.
41:54Do you really feel that way?
41:56Of course I do.
41:57Well then, can you please withdraw your complaint?
42:00You can recant and indemnify Bailey against a lawsuit.
42:03I can get my job back.
42:04What?
42:05Look, I'm sorry if I mishandled things with you in any way.
42:09I just thought we were both having a good time.
42:11Wait, stop.
42:11Just stop.
42:12I don't know what you're talking about.
42:16I never filed a complaint.
42:32Coop, he's on a call.
42:33It's okay.
42:36It's okay.
42:36There was never any complaint.
42:37Coop, you can't be here.
42:39Liv Cross never filed a complaint.
42:41It's an HR issue.
42:41I only know what I'm told.
42:42Bullshit, Jack.
42:43You did this.
42:44You broke company policy.
42:45My hands were tied.
42:46You saw an opportunity to take my book and you decided to fuck me.
42:49You fucked yourself.
42:50I thought we were friends.
42:54At least let me keep my fucking capital account.
42:57I'm begging you.
42:58That's my money.
42:59I need that money.
43:00No, it isn't.
43:03Your biggest mistake was thinking any of this was ever yours.
43:07All right, all right.
43:12It's not yours if you can't keep it.
43:35I just can't let you ruin that beautiful movie.
43:38Okay, start her up.
43:52You.
43:53Okay.
44:06Here.
44:07Oh!
44:20How is Tori's boyfriend?
44:24Jake?
44:25That's correct.
44:27He'll survive.
44:30And Tori?
44:33Gotta give it a couple more days.
44:35I'm working on it.
44:42You're not yourself, Coop.
44:46Look, I'm sorry about the barbecue.
44:49I was a little over-served.
44:50I'm not talking about the barbecue,
44:51and I'm not talking about the fact
44:52that you assaulted our daughter's boyfriend.
44:54All that, Jesus Christ.
44:55What, then?
44:58I don't know.
44:59You just seem so...
45:02alone.
45:04Yeah, well, I live here,
45:06and you live there in our house with our kids.
45:10I know.
45:11You left me.
45:11That would make me...
45:14alone.
45:16That's not what I'm talking about, though.
45:19I'm worried about you.
45:26I'm worried about you.
45:29What is it?
45:33Now come on, you can still talk to me, can't you?
45:39I'm fine.
45:40Um, I am, I'm, I'm, I'm finding my way.
45:53Okay.
46:00Fair enough.
46:10Thanks for coming by.
46:12Thanks for the beer.
46:22Miss Cross.
46:24How can I help you?
46:25I was hoping for an explanation.
46:27The Andrew Cooper thing.
46:29I didn't file a complaint.
46:30Somebody reported your involvement to HR.
46:33But there was no complaint.
46:35Whiskey.
46:36No.
46:37Sit.
46:41I'm sorry that it was phrased like that.
46:43But complaint or not, Mr. Cooper was in direct violation of our company's code of conduct.
46:48He's in a position of power and we take our protections very seriously.
46:52He's nowhere on my org chart.
46:54I don't report to anyone who reports to him.
46:56Does that mean he couldn't get you fired if he so chose?
46:58He didn't need to lose his job.
47:00Mm.
47:01I've got a conference room full of labor lawyers who say otherwise.
47:09Shepard tells me that you're a star.
47:11He wants to put you up for a promotion.
47:12He wants you running your own desk.
47:14Are you ready for that?
47:15How is that related to this?
47:17Oh, I'm done with this.
47:17I've moved on to that.
47:19I'm more interested in your future than Coop's past.
47:28I tell you what.
47:29I've got a phone call in a minute.
47:30But let's do dinner later in the week and discuss.
47:34Mary will check your avails.
47:36Shouldn't Shepard join us?
47:40Shepard's welcome to join.
47:53If you were alone in this world, what would be your name?
48:13If you were to shout at the gods,
48:18Please.
48:19Maybe it was for me too.
48:23What would you call him?
48:31What would you call yourself?
48:38What would you call yourself?
48:41What would you call yourself?
48:51What would you call myself?
48:56What would you call myself?
49:27What would you call myself?
49:35What would you call myself?
49:37What would you call myself?
49:51Viewed from a certain perspective, life boils down to a series of interconnected decisions.
49:56The Millers decided to go to Belize.
50:00I decided to go to the Millers.
50:08Westmont Village has its own private security patrol as well as the Westmont Police Department.
50:14The crime rate is almost nonexistent.
50:18You live in a place like that long enough, you start to feel insulated from the rest of the world.
50:22You get complacent about things like alarm systems and locking all your doors.
50:28The Millers
50:28The Millers
50:42The Millers
50:45The Millers
50:49The Millers
51:15the patek philippe nautilus sealed 18 karat white gold blue sunburst dial water resistant
51:20up to 30 meters like that will ever come up like the ads say you never actually own a
51:26patek philippe you merely look after it for the next generation
51:31well the next generation tells time on their phones so i figured no one was going to miss
51:35this one
52:18hi guys is everything okay good evening sir you live here yeah yeah i sure do your house was
52:24placed on the vacation watch starting tonight saw the honda parked on the street lights on in the
52:28house figured we'd check in that's my son's car i told him to pull it into the garage before we
52:36left so you are going on vacation oh yeah bright and early tomorrow morning my wife must have given
52:40you the wrong day when she called it in no worries have a great trip thanks you guys i appreciate
52:46it
53:07i don't know what i was thinking well that's not true i was thinking that peter and diane miller
53:12were assholes and they didn't deserve all of this and i was thinking that there were plenty of assholes
53:18just like them in the neighborhood with houses just like this filled with expensive shit just like
53:23this that would never be missed piles of forgotten wealth just lying around in drawers where they were
53:29doing no one any good i knew this because up until a little while ago i'd been one of those
53:35assholes
53:47i was thinking about alimony child support legal fees two houses a maxed out home equity line
53:52tuition property taxes health insurance premiums sat tutors child psychologists car payments gardeners
53:57exterminators roofers painters plumbers drum kits and a bank account that was still in the red from the
54:02divorce and how no one including the cops apparently would ever suspect a guy like me
54:08i'm not saying it was a good idea it was just temporary a quick fix to pay some bills until
54:13i got
54:13back on my feet and i figured what's the worst that could happen
54:24so
54:35you
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