- 19 hours ago
The A Word S01E05 H 264
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TVTranscript
00:01Hi, Mr. Scott. Twice in one week. You're spoiling me.
00:03Our secret's out.
00:05Is it really such a bad thing?
00:06Yes, it is.
00:07For the first time today, I thought it might be okay here.
00:09That's a coincidence. For the first time today, I thought this is never gonna work.
00:12It's your family. You're all so intense. I can't see you again.
00:16I'm going to Dad's for the weekend.
00:17Any time you want to live to your dad, you only have to ask.
00:21I thought you hated him.
00:22I do.
00:22You do know that doing this without taking precautions is how babies get made.
00:27Well, don't be such a bad thing.
00:29It felt like for a few moments, I could see the real Joe.
00:31We've got our very own Meyer effect, of course.
00:33Between me and you, we're trying for another baby.
00:35Can you get me the morning-after pill?
00:37I woke up this morning and just realized it's not the right time.
00:43That was all the day.
00:44It wasn't my cat in the sex.
00:45I'm in the news.
00:49The king's turn's on his face But it's honest you.
00:55All wraps up the same.
00:58All wraps up the same.
01:01They can't have it, you can't have it.
01:04I found out too, until I learned to accept my reward
01:22Roast of stunning cues and stunning cues
01:28Love in solitude like I would use
01:34Cholera
01:35Maja, calm down, just don't say anything
01:38It's not traffic cop, it's all there
01:40Everything will be fine
01:43Remember cuddles in the kitchen, yeah
01:45To get us off the ground and eat wash
01:49Maja, turn the music off
01:53Joe
01:56It's right to remember that they let today
01:59You're all arguments to have when you caught your face on
02:03Sorry, he's upset, he likes to sing
02:05He was wandering down the road
02:07We're taking him back to his parents
02:09So he's not actually your child?
02:11No, we were just giving him a left home
02:15Would you wait there a moment, please?
02:18Why did you start talking about Joe?
02:19He didn't even take attention
02:20I started talking about Joe because he asked me, what do I have to do?
02:30Go to the beach
02:41Morning
02:41Oh, God
02:57No, come on, it's too early for that one
03:01Oh, no
03:03Let's try for twins
03:04I don't think biology works that way
03:10Oh, come on
03:11Oh, that's Stuart dropping Becky off
03:13Gosh, even his car horn sounds like a twat
03:16Now, now, don't start
03:19Sorry we're here so early, I forgot the roads were so empty around here
03:22Oh, surely the crowd's gathered at the roadside to catch a glimpse of you
03:25Same old Alison
03:26Well, there's a sight I don't want to see any time soon
03:29Look at my new sister, isn't she cute?
03:32Hi Paul, you all right?
03:33Hey
03:34What is it about Alison, she always manages to find a man to run around after her?
03:40Rebecca tells me you're opening the restaurant soon
03:43Gastropub
03:44Yeah, not long now
03:45Chef's doing his first cook-ups today
03:47Very brave, pub's closing left, right and centre
03:49It's a gastropub
03:50Paul knows what he's doing
03:52I'm not saying he doesn't
03:53I'm just saying it's a difficult time to be opening anything up
03:56Especially this conversation
03:58Paul's done his research
03:59It's a great location, great chef, locally sourced produce
04:02You don't know he's a great chef yet though, do you?
04:04I mean, if he's only just doing his first cook-ups
04:08How's the caravan business, Stuart?
04:10Campervan, thriving, yeah
04:11It's just gone mad actually
04:12A load of middle-aged couples going off to festivals after the kids have left home
04:16Well, with your ever-growing family, you're gonna need it, eh?
04:19Hey, who says I'll stop at four?
04:21Life's an adventure
04:22Marry's still young, if I have more kids then so be it
04:24I'll raise you to five
04:25Five kids, really? Who are you marrying next?
04:28Dad said that he's gonna get me a campervan when I pass my driving test
04:31How cool is that?
04:32Ooh, yeah, very cool, very cool
04:36Maybe a bit big for your first car, do you think?
04:38Well, not a campervan per se, but I'd rather have her driving something than hanging around bus stops at night
04:42She'll have something to drive, Stuart, you don't need to worry about that
04:45Oh, right
04:45Yeah, like, get me a car, really
04:47No
04:48No promises
04:49No, we'll talk about it
04:51Try, but
04:52Sorry, Rebecca hadn't mentioned anything about her, I don't want to tread on anyone's toes
04:56Tread on anyone's toes
04:58Right, that's me off
05:00OK, nice to see you again, Stuart
05:01Yeah
05:02Becca, back to reality, I think
05:03You know, you've got a ton of homework to do, I think
05:07OK
05:07Two of my three favourite girls in the world
05:09Yes, you are
05:12You are
05:13Yes, you are
05:14Yes, you are
05:31Dad
05:33It can't be all bad, look how lovely you are
05:36Although, I think that might be nurture more than nature
05:39Are you doing it again?
05:42It might not seem like it, but you being happy, it's the most important thing in the world
05:49Apart from Joe coming home in a police car
06:01Maya's not Polish
06:03I'm sorry, of course she's Polish
06:05Turns out not
06:06She came from Ukraine on a short-term study visa
06:09And she's overstayed it by seven months
06:11No, no, this isn't right, she's Polish, she's legal, she's like part of our family, she helps out with Joe
06:17Is that in a paid capacity?
06:20No, it's not
06:21No
06:22No, it's not in a paid capacity, she's the girlfriend of the lad at my dad's brewery
06:27She's interested in teaching, so she helps out now
06:29Where is she now? I need to get Joe to school
06:31She's been taken to the police station to be interviewed
06:34She's being held in a police station here?
06:38This can't be happening
06:39They'll assess if she's at risk of fleeing, and if not, they'll start the process of her being removed
06:43Or more likely, going home voluntarily
06:46No, she's not going anywhere
06:47I don't think that's for you to say, madam
06:49Who's your senior officer?
06:50Inspector Heard
06:51Okay
06:52Bob Heard
06:54Great, okay
06:55Inspector Heard
06:56We'll just go and see Bob, he'll sort this out
06:59It doesn't work like that, madam
07:00It does work like that, believe me, for me, it very much works like that
07:05Come on, Joe
07:08Everything okay?
07:08Oh, yeah, fine
07:10PC Plum turned up in person
07:11Listen, would you be able to take Joe to school?
07:13Oh, I'm already late
07:14Well, even better
07:15Look, now you've got an excuse
07:16Joe, will you go with Nicola, love?
07:18Joe, go with Nicola, okay?
07:20Er...
07:20Okay, erm...
07:22Did you manage to talk to Paul?
07:24I've got one or two other things on my mind right now
07:26See you later
07:32There she is
07:35What?
07:36Slumming it today, then?
07:38His car knocked out
07:39You mean it broke down
07:40Gonna cost Bear money to repair and he ain't got it right now
07:45Okay, why are you talking in that weird way?
07:48People change
07:49Get over it
07:51What's wrong with it?
07:53The car, not the accent
07:55Probably all that wanking you were both doing in it
07:57The suspension
07:59Mm, you'd know about that
08:01Not sure that Rep RT is your strong suit, Dan
08:04Rebecca would know about it too from what I hear
08:07What?
08:08Calm down, Becky
08:11I mean, for what Luke tells me, I couldn't keep up with you anyway
08:14Who else have you told?
08:17Is that your mum?
08:18Your mum?
08:19Now you really are scraping the barrel
08:21No, your mum
08:23There
08:35Dad, can you give me a call when you get this, please?
08:37I'm at the police station
08:38My husband detained
08:39Some immigration nonsense
08:40Oh, better still, can you ring your mate Bob Heard?
08:43Inspector Heard
08:44Thanks
08:46Inspector Heard, her meeting's all day
08:47Yeah, thank you, I'll wait
08:531, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10
09:00Are you going to school now?
09:03Bye
09:05I'm packing you with extra pair of shoes and your angry eyes, just in case
09:09Mrs. Potato Head Toy Story 2
09:23Let's go.
09:57I can't really help right now, Alison.
09:59I'm 14 blood samples behind.
10:01Yeah, I just thought that you could get a GP's letter
10:03supporting her right to remain on medical grounds.
10:06Uh, well, I'll try, but it's a long shot.
10:10Can't you just write it and get your prick of a boss to sign it?
10:13A prick of a boss can actually read?
10:17Oh, God.
10:19Sorry about that.
10:21She wasn't being gratuitously offensive.
10:22She really does just think you're a prick.
10:24Fair enough.
10:25What about you?
10:26I don't really have a strong opinion either way.
10:29I'll count that as a result.
10:30You're late.
10:32There's a GP trainee post just turned up in a mate's practice.
10:35You should give him a call.
10:39Are you sucking me?
10:40I will if that's what it takes to stop you wasting your talent in this place.
10:43You know that isn't how it works.
10:45I need to apply for an inter-deanary transfer.
10:47Blah, blah, blah, official yawn.
10:49Let's just say I have connections, if you want it.
10:53It's in Stockport.
10:54It is indeed.
10:55And as you are now used to rain, it shouldn't be too much of a culture shock.
10:58This isn't about the phone call just now.
11:00No.
11:01Call him.
11:02You'll get on.
11:03He's less of a prick than me.
11:05And Stockport has a hat museum.
11:09Thanks for seeing me, Bob.
11:10I'm not sure I had much choice, did I?
11:14She's being released.
11:15Oh, great.
11:18Thank you so much.
11:19She's coming to see us tomorrow to be issued with an IS-96.
11:24And, er, then she's agreed to go home to Ukraine.
11:28She agree- she can't have agreed.
11:30That's- can't she appeal?
11:33If she appeals, we are obliged to investigate how she's been supporting herself.
11:38Why are you saying it like that?
11:42How's Maurice?
11:46Er, he's- he's well, yeah.
11:48He's, um, he's up a hill somewhere, racing sheep, else he'd be here too.
11:54You do know there's nothing I can do, don't you?
11:57Look, I don't know what my dad's told you about Joe, his grandson.
12:01Nothing much, to tell the truth.
12:03Er, there's a problem with his hearing, I think he said.
12:06That's right, yeah.
12:07It's a- it's a problem with his hearing.
12:09And Maya, she's brilliant with him.
12:12She's got childcare qualifications from her own country.
12:14Poland or Ukraine?
12:15Does it matter?
12:16He says she's talented, and she's unlocked something in Joe, and he's your mate's grandson, so...
12:22So?
12:24So you must be able to turn a blind eye, Bob.
12:28You can't seriously be asking me to break the law in a police station.
12:32I'm seriously asking you to forget your job for a minute and remember who you are.
12:36My dad's oldest mate.
12:38I'm seriously asking you to show some compassion, Bob.
12:41I show compassion every day of my working life.
12:44Maurice has always done it right by you, hasn't he?
12:46The police Christmas party, the brewery, every year all that free beer.
12:50Are you suggesting that all that free beer over the years was him buying goodwill
12:54in case he needed it later on?
12:56Are you telling me that you've never done a favour for a mate?
12:59I am already turning a blind eye to the fact that she was illegally working at the brewery
13:03and illegally working for you.
13:05If I flagged that up, she could be asked to pay back her wages.
13:08And you and the brewery could be fined ten grand apiece.
13:11Now, if I were you, I'd leave.
13:13While you still had an ounce of goodwill left in the bank of Bob Hurt.
13:19The year my dad's had since my mum died.
13:21He's just finished grieving and you'd do this to his grandson.
13:25He's some fucking mess.
13:35It's not over, Maya, believe me.
13:39I think it is over.
13:41I'm sorry.
13:42I should have told you.
13:43No, no, we'll appeal.
13:45If I appeal and lose, I won't be allowed back for ten years.
13:48Hey, what about David?
13:49What about him?
13:51Well, you already live together, don't you?
13:53Why don't you get married?
13:55Are you making a joke?
13:56No, he's an EU citizen.
13:57You obviously love each other.
13:59Why don't you marry him?
14:02Maybe one day.
14:05But in the future.
14:06Look, maybe that one day in the future is right now.
14:11Hey?
14:13Come on.
14:14You're insane.
14:16She isn't going to get married just because you asked her to.
14:19Won't be so sure about that.
14:49Why don't you take your hand?
14:50How do you feel? We've been talking a long time about marriage.
15:20As a matter of fact, I asked if he wouldn't charge you for trying to bribe a police officer and
15:25that he accept your apology.
15:26When did you see Bob Bird?
15:27I'm not apologising.
15:28You are? You've got to. He's my best mate here.
15:31And you've just marched into that office and shat all over that friendship.
15:34It's about the worst thing you could have done.
15:36Not for Joe, it wasn't.
15:37Oh, for God's sake, there are more things in this world than Joe.
15:39Not to me, there aren't.
15:41There are, Alison. I know you don't want to hear it, but there are.
15:43I'd love to stand here and argue with you all day, Dad, but I've got to get help from people
15:46that give a shit.
15:47Of course I give a shit. It's me grandson.
15:50I'm just saying you can't expect everybody to do your bidding whenever you say the word Joe.
15:55Oi.
15:57Alison.
15:59Alison.
16:04Nice, Maurice.
16:06Oh, are you defending her? She tried to blackmail a police officer.
16:09I think blackmail's a bit strong, innit?
16:11This is Bob Bird we're talking about.
16:13He'd turn a blind eye to murder if there was a pint in it for him.
16:16She's out of control.
16:17She tries to fix everything by willing it to happen or shouting about it.
16:21Oh, I wonder where she gets that from.
16:28This is all your fault?
16:29What were you thinking of?
16:30Hiring a bloody Ukrainian?
16:32Everyone thought she was Polish.
16:35I see you're having this new conditioning vessel installed.
16:38Yeah, I took an informed decision and went against your advice.
16:41Well, I know that.
16:41That's why I had a word with the supplier, make sure you weren't being made a mug of.
16:46What?
16:46You did what?
16:50You can't do it, can you?
16:51You just can't let it go.
16:56You know what?
16:58I'm not sure that this is working out.
17:01Right.
17:02I don't know.
17:03You know, round peg, square hole.
17:04You might want to think about looking for something else.
17:07Yeah.
17:09I agree.
17:10What?
17:11You may not have noticed, but I actually like it here.
17:14And to my surprise, and yours, I'm actually good at it.
17:17Not just the rebranding, the internet stuff, the marketing, but the actual brewing.
17:22The science, the precision, the magic.
17:25You don't need to tell me about that.
17:26I've lived it.
17:27I know.
17:28And that's the problem.
17:31Dad, what's clear is that one of us has to walk away from this, and it's never going to be
17:34you.
17:36A couple of people I know from uni approached me when I first moved back.
17:39You know, people who actually think I might have something to offer.
17:42Crazy as it sounds, people who might believe in me.
17:46I see.
17:47I see.
17:48I gave up my job to give you something to do.
17:51You brew three ales, and that's it.
17:53Brewing's done.
17:54Time to move on.
17:55It isn't working out.
17:56You just said so yourself.
17:57I said that because I'm pissed off with you.
17:59No.
18:00You said that because you were pissed off with Alison.
18:03There's such a thing as being too clever, you know?
18:06I'm sure there is.
18:08But I don't think it's something either of us have to worry about any time soon.
18:19See you tomorrow.
18:23Can I have a word, Paul?
18:26Yeah, sure.
18:27Just so you know, Joe, he seems a bit off today.
18:31Couldn't get him to join in at all, not even with the activities he likes.
18:34Maybe he's feeling a bit under the weather.
18:37Yeah.
18:37It'll be nothing.
18:38I just thought you'd like to know.
18:40Okay.
18:43Hiya, Mozart.
18:45Hey.
18:46Come on.
18:50Perfect.
18:51Come on.
18:55Ah, there he is.
18:57Eddie?
18:59A bit of bad news on the beer front, I'm afraid.
19:02Oh, yeah?
19:03Yeah, the builders have just told me that the plumbing behind the bar's not going to be ready in time,
19:07but the draft ale says it's supposed to be all bought.
19:11I'm sorry, mate.
19:12I know how much you put into that special.
19:15It's only beer.
19:17Right, good.
19:18Good.
19:19I was Joe since his trauma this morning.
19:21Trauma?
19:23Yeah, he's absolutely fine.
19:27Yeah?
19:33Me and your Uncle Eddie, we once had a ride in the back of a police car when we were
19:37young lads, didn't we, Ed?
19:39Bit older, maybe.
19:41Well done now, though, eh?
19:43That's the main thing.
19:44Isn't it?
19:46Come on, then.
19:49I think he's forgotten it even happened.
19:51No point making a big deal about it.
19:53Get him upset.
19:54Least said.
19:55Soonest mended and all that.
19:56Yeah, sure.
19:57Come on, then.
19:58After the morning night, I think it should be the family motto.
20:03Maya won't be coming to play with you for a little while.
20:06She's got to go home.
20:08Be with her mum for a bit.
20:10Yes.
20:11And that might make you sad, but...
20:13Maya will come back.
20:15Yes.
20:16Do you understand, Jo?
20:18Let me see now.
20:21Yes.
20:24And Maya's gonna come round and say goodbye to you before she goes.
20:27Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye!
20:29Jo, can you try and look at me?
20:31Does I need to look at you, love, if he gets it?
20:33Love, do you get it?
20:34Maya's not gonna be here with you anymore.
20:36Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye!
20:38I think he gets it.
20:40There you go.
20:55I know you like to bury everything, but Jo needs to understand what's going on.
20:58What if he understands perfectly and is okay with it?
21:01He can't be okay with it.
21:02He has a bond with Maya.
21:04I don't want him to panic when she's not around.
21:06Sounds like it's you that's panicking.
21:07I spend my whole life panicking.
21:10Are we doing the right thing?
21:11Can we ever do the right thing?
21:13Then there's Rebecca.
21:14Us.
21:14The diner, the restaurant, the baby you want so badly.
21:18The baby we want so badly.
21:20I don't panic when Jo is with Maya, so yes, I am.
21:23I'm terrified that Maya's leaving.
21:25The baby we want so badly.
21:27That's what he said!
21:36There's only one good way of dealing with boys' gossip.
21:39Ignore it, I know.
21:40Ignore it?
21:41No.
21:43Avenge it.
21:45Really?
21:46Get Luke on his own and intimidate him.
21:49How am I gonna do that though?
21:51He chucks me.
21:52Use something personal and hurtful and make it count.
21:58What if I, I don't know, make it worse?
22:03He's a teenage boy.
22:04He's 20 times more insecure than you,
22:06despite the monkey walk and big shoulders.
22:09I'm sure you'll think of something.
22:10Well, monkey walk and big shoulders isn't a bad start.
22:13You make sure you scare that little shit for an ex-boyfriend
22:16from turning you into masturbation fodder for his virgin mates.
22:20Don't let me down.
22:21Don't let me down.
22:36Louise!
22:37Maurice!
22:42Are you here for open mic night?
22:43No! No!
22:45Well, of course it's worth I think you're ready.
22:49just having a drink with a pal
22:53well
22:59you said your alison wanted to apologise
23:02i thought you meant that alison would actually be here in person apologising
23:06don't be a stickler bob just enjoy your pint
23:10fair enough
23:14i'm sorry about alison i really am
23:16she's a bit of a naughty
23:18yeah well she was desperate i could see that
23:20have you got something going with that milf music teacher with the backward lad
23:29and she keeps looking at me
23:30yeah well there's a reason for that
23:32oh yeah dark horse
23:41i can't stay long
23:42what have you been saying to your mates about me and you
23:45nothing
23:45well from what dan said to me this morning i don't think that's true
23:49you didn't tell me it was supposed to be a secret
23:51it's not a secret it's private
23:53and despite your new after pegs stupid act i thought you'd known the difference
23:57it's not really that big a deal is it
23:59i won't be masturbation fodder for your virgin mates
24:02it's a bit late for that now
24:05it's a bit late for that now
24:06i just thought you should know that um my auntie's a doctor
24:08at doctor grave surgery
24:11so
24:11so she has access to everyone's medical records including yours
24:16so if there's anything in there that you don't want the whole town to know about
24:18i'd be a bit more careful about what you say about me
24:23i feel like i don't know you anymore
24:24well that's good because i'd rather you didn't
24:31it wasn't a serious thing you know
24:34louise was the first woman i'd had anything to do with since i lost sandra
24:38well don't play it down it's still a result
24:40i think maybe i just wanted to know that life moves on after all
24:45yeah yeah yeah i get that
24:47i tell the truth
24:49being with someone else you know
24:51holding someone else like that
24:53i still felt lonely
24:55made me miss sandra more not less
25:00everything about it felt wrong
25:02there's nothing like a bit of wrong to get the juices flowing eh
25:05bloody hell i'm opening me heart to you here bob
25:08i know you're scaring me
25:10oh come on i'm only having enough
25:14is it definitely over between you and her then
25:17yeah i'd say so
25:20so how would you feel if i asked her out
25:25fine
25:26yeah
25:28yeah
25:28yeah
25:29yeah
25:30absolutely
25:31what are we
25:32couple of teenagers riding up and down outside her house on our bikes
25:36after a decent interval obviously
25:38obviously
25:38goes without saying
25:45i've got a lot of teenagers moving i'm gonna play out of it
25:56oh don't you say
26:01because i was like
26:03i've got a lot of kids i'm going out of it
26:05it's just
26:05and i'm lying
26:10and i'm not sure
26:13for you.
26:18Jo, look at the photo. Who's that?
26:21Who's that?
26:22Has anyone seen my English book?
26:23No.
26:23Anyone?
26:24Jo, it's Maya. Isn't it? You know Maya.
26:28She's gonna be going away.
26:30Does that make you sad?
26:33It makes me sad, yes.
26:36Does it really?
26:41Jo, Jo, do you understand that Maya's gonna be going away?
26:45Has anyone seen my pen?
26:46Oh, for God's sake.
26:47For God's sake.
26:49Hey, Jo, Jo.
26:51I know you're upset.
26:53Now you know this is hard for you.
26:54Lost your love of life, too much apple pie.
26:57Who have you lost your love of life, too much apple pie?
27:02My heart is watching when it's on your side.
27:09We've got a fix on the whole heart.
27:12We've got a flex on the whole heart.
27:15We've got a flex on the whole heart.
27:16But at least they just come up.
27:19Oh, I really want to know.
27:22Because every person who loves that same inside.
27:27Oh!
27:37I'm sorry!
27:39No!
27:39No!
27:40Keep up.
27:44Never gonna go.
27:44No, no, no, no, no, no.
27:46No, no, no.
27:48No, no, no, no.
27:50No, no, no, no, no!
28:25You late?
28:26Did you sleep with Bob Herd?
28:29No.
28:30Did you?
28:34I have another student booked after you, so we'll have to cut it short.
28:39Everybody loves a happy ending
28:42But we don't even try
28:46We go straight past pretending
28:49To the part
28:51Where everybody loves to cry
28:58Indoor fireworks
29:00I was fine. Why did you stop?
29:08Did you sleep with him?
29:10No, I did not.
29:12Then why was his car outside the pub this morning?
29:15Because he drank too much
29:16And being a police inspector
29:18He's more respectful than most of the drink driving laws
29:20Well, I know that's not true
29:22For a start
29:24We drank too much
29:25Because we couldn't stop talking about you
29:30Oh
29:33Right
29:43Dear me, Morris
29:44Is this really still a thing?
29:46Age 56
29:47And you don't fancy me
29:48Until your best mate has a crack at me
29:49And then you decide you fancy me after all
29:51Good God
29:51Does nothing change at all?
29:53I don't go much on analysis
29:54Clearly
29:56I'm sorry
29:56I'm just very confused at the moment
29:59Morris
30:00We've been to bed together a couple of times
30:02We're not in a relationship
30:03You don't get to tell me you're confused
30:05You don't care about my feelings?
30:07I don't care enough about your feelings
30:08To torture myself
30:09Trying to second guess them
30:12Now
30:12Are you going to sing?
30:13Or are you going to leave?
30:27We get to the part where
30:29I say that I'm going to leave
30:34I'll be back in ten minutes, I promise
30:36You better be
30:36I've got a life too, you know
30:38Got hot yoga for beginners at 2.30
30:39Yeah, I'll be back
30:40I said
30:41Did you manage to talk to Paul?
30:43About not wanting to get pregnant
30:49When you take Joe for an appointment
30:52Do you notice all the parents
30:53For the other children?
30:56Mainly I notice the kids
30:57That are a lot worse than Joe
30:58And feel guilty
30:58That I'm pleased
31:00Take a look at the parents next time
31:03Or just a mum
31:05Or a dad
31:07Never a couple
31:09Nicola, you're clever
31:10But you're not relationship clever
31:12Paul and me
31:12We're not the kind of couple
31:13That split up
31:16Everyone thinks that
31:17Till they do
31:25No way up
31:28Oof, a bit early, Dad
31:29I need a stiff drink
31:30In case me daughter
31:31Starts telling me off again
31:33And if pub food
31:34Doesn't taste good with beer
31:35Then it's all over
31:36Oh, too right
31:37Gotta be big on flavour
31:38I mean
31:39Don't get me wrong
31:40I like a skate wing
31:41As much as the next guy
31:41Just never on a pub menu
31:43You're talking my language
31:44Got it?
31:45Stop taking over, Dad
31:46You won't know I'm here
31:47Right then
31:48Herb baked fish
31:49Could be battered
31:50Right
31:50What do you think?
31:51Yeah
31:51Lamp stew
31:52Venison sausages
31:53And a vegetarian option
31:55For them that want to spoil it
31:56For everybody else
31:57All locally sourced
31:58Mint cake and sheep
31:59Sheep shit are locally sourced
32:00Doesn't mean it should be on the menu
32:02Thought we wouldn't know
32:03You were here, Maurice
32:04Paul, I was thinking
32:05Maybe one change
32:06Before next week
32:06And then depending on the day
32:08Sorry, sorry
32:08It's my son's school
32:09Hello
32:13Right, okay
32:14Yeah
32:15Oh, Barry
32:17Sorry
32:28I remember when a scallop
32:30Meant a slice of potato
32:31In batter
32:32I want you to cut Eddie some slack
32:34On the scallop front
32:35I realise that Eddie doesn't correspond
32:37To your traditional notion
32:38Of masculinity
32:39And therefore you have issues
32:40Around treating him as a grown-up
32:41But it's got to stop, Maurice
32:43Whoa
32:44Where's this come from?
32:45You clearly have problems
32:46With him knowing about
32:46Your burgeoning relationship
32:47With Louise
32:48There's no burgeoning going on
32:49Of any description
32:50That ship has sailed
32:52It's over
32:52Whatever it was
32:53And secondly
32:54I only ever rode Eddie
32:56To see that his heart was in it
32:57And it turns out
32:58It isn't
32:58What do you mean?
33:00He hasn't told you
33:01He's told me he's got other plans
33:03Outside the brewery
33:06He hasn't told you
33:07Really?
33:08Typical
33:09It seems to me
33:10It should be him
33:11You're bollocking
33:37He was very agitated
33:41When he came in
33:41And then he wouldn't come away
33:43From doing his little door dance
33:44He was tipping chairs over
33:46And throwing books around
33:47He was very upset
33:49Something must have
33:50Happened with another kid
33:52Or something
33:52That's
33:52Did you see anything?
33:54Nothing that we're aware of
33:56How has he been at home?
33:59Well actually
34:00There's a
34:01There's a young lady
34:02That's been helping out
34:03And she's
34:04Unfortunately
34:04She's going to have to leave
34:05So
34:07Maybe that's
34:07Or not
34:09Or none
34:10He doesn't say
34:11How he feels
34:12So you know
34:12Who knows
34:14But we have been
34:15Talking about it
34:15A lot
34:19This change at home
34:20Maybe it's something
34:21We could talk about
34:22At home time
34:24Story time
34:24No look
34:25Sorry
34:25No he doesn't need
34:33I just don't think
34:34He needs to dwell on it
34:35Any longer
34:36Than necessary
34:38Well
34:39What I've been doing with Joe
34:41When he's been finding things
34:42A bit difficult
34:42Is using story cards
34:45He seems to quite like them
34:46Perhaps it's something
34:47You could try at home
34:48If you have the time
34:51Perhaps
34:56Yeah
34:56Do you know
34:56They actually sound
34:57Really helpful
34:58Thank you
34:59This does happen
35:00In the first term
35:01It could happen
35:01To any child
35:02Not just a child
35:03Like Joe
35:04Yeah
35:05I know
35:05We get it
35:07Thanks
35:09So much for him
35:10Not feeling anything
35:11About my leaving
35:12So much for you
35:13Putting ideas into his head
35:14Joe
35:17Where do you fancy
35:18Where's he going then
35:18Kidder
35:21Anywhere
35:22Anywhere
35:23Would that be
35:24Anywhere
35:24With chips
35:26And a milkshake
35:27What are you doing
35:29You can't reward him
35:30Wrecking a classroom
35:31I'm not
35:32I'm treating him
35:33Because he's upset
35:34Oh do what you like
35:35I'm sick of playing
35:36Bad cop
35:56What are you doing
36:11He was fine with Maya leaving, but you kept picking away at him
36:15until finally he got so wound up that he flipped out at school.
36:18So well done, you.
36:19Next stop, nervous breakdown.
36:21Yeah, well done me.
36:22Because you know what?
36:24I'm glad it happened.
36:26Why?
36:26To satisfy your need for an emotional outburst?
36:28His need, not mine.
36:30I don't think you know the difference, do you?
36:39Right then, what we have in.
36:42Same again, is it?
36:47Other people might think that this is a necessary activity for the children.
36:52So leave them doing it.
36:55The point is, having worked with a lot of kids, I can't see it makes them happy.
37:00I can't see it cost them a lot.
37:02And I see a loss.
37:04I see loss.
37:07Thanks.
37:10Hey.
37:11Hey.
37:12Hey.
37:13I think you should stay and watch this.
37:15Later on, there's a boy.
37:17When he was three years old, his parents were told he was so severely autistic that he would
37:21never talk.
37:23And then he had intensive applied behavioural analysis.
37:25He's now 16, normal teenager.
37:28And he plays badminton for his national team.
37:30Well, badminton, eh?
37:32Yeah, well.
37:33Can't have everything.
37:40What if he's right, Paul?
37:43Eh?
37:44What if he's right, and we're wrong, and we make jokes about this stuff, and then we
37:49turn around and Joe's 16, and he's still flinging chairs around when he's upset, but nobody
37:52thinks he's cute anymore.
37:53Nobody thinks they can handle him anymore.
37:55How do you know he hadn't just had enough of you telling him to be upset?
37:59If he feels something, he has to learn to express it.
38:03If that means turning a few chairs over at school now, I think that's a small price to pay.
38:13Well, you'd better get that.
38:15Might be the emotion fairy with more feelings for you to scatter around.
38:24Hi.
38:24Sorry, it's not a great time, guys.
38:27Is your daughter home?
38:31Lovely hall, by the way.
38:34Can we come in?
38:36Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.
38:37Just come on through.
38:42Okay, let me get this straight, Rebecca.
38:44You told Luke that you had access to his medical records.
38:47I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get anyone into trouble.
38:50I have to say, I admire your angle of attack.
38:53Unfortunately, your friend told his mother who ran the surgery.
38:58Oh, my God.
39:00He told his mother?
39:01Really?
39:03How lame is that?
39:04Rebecca, the shocking bit is that you would do something so stupid, not that he would tell his mum.
39:08Although I have to agree, that is pretty lame.
39:11And you talked around his mum?
39:13Yeah.
39:14You seem to be forgetting how revered I am in this town.
39:18Yes, I talked around, but unfortunately, I had to agree to sack Nicola.
39:31So it's not just Nicola, none of this family have a sense of humour.
39:34None of this family have your sense of humour.
39:36That's not the same thing.
39:38Of course I didn't sack Nicola, but if you want to get at your friend again, then choose another way,
39:43okay?
39:46Right, well, uh, thank you for being so understanding.
39:48Thank you, yeah.
39:54I'm sorry.
39:56We know.
39:57Mind telling us why?
39:59You hurt my feelings.
40:01Said some stuff.
40:02What stuff?
40:04Eh?
40:04I could only give him a thump.
40:05Oh, you feel a good idea today, aren't you?
40:07Sometimes audacious is the only thing that works.
40:10I sound like Stuart's.
40:11So what?
40:12Yeah, so what?
40:14Thanks, Mum.
40:41At least Graves saw the funny side.
40:43And he always sees a funny side.
40:44That's probably what makes him so irritating.
40:46If you had Morris on your case all day, then you'd have something to complain about.
40:49Is that why you told him you had other plans?
40:52Morris, because he's on your case all day.
40:54Were you being serious about that, or were you just saying it to get back at him?
40:58I didn't say anything, cos I was just exploring.
41:01There have been a couple of approaches.
41:04Nothing is certain, but a research post in Manchester.
41:10Manchester?
41:11Yes.
41:12Manchester.
41:13A place with universities, libraries, public transport, Wi-Fi, phone coverage.
41:19And not a single member of my family, so what do you say?
41:23Fancy joining the escape committee?
41:25I don't think so.
41:28Oh.
41:28I was approached about a job away from here.
41:31There's a trainee post not far from Manchester, as it turns out.
41:35Really?
41:35This is perfect, isn't it?
41:37Well, it would be, except I said no.
41:41I don't believe you.
41:42I think...
41:46We've just started to get happy here.
41:48Next you'll be telling me you like my family.
41:50Well, not like, exactly, but I do kind of see the point of you all.
41:54Come on.
41:56We can be happy somewhere else, can't we?
41:58I don't know that.
41:59Neither do you.
42:01Our marriage is so shit, it can only work somewhere we both hate.
42:05I'm starting to like it here.
42:08And...
42:11I...
42:12understand you here.
42:15You might not like to think it suits you here, but it does.
42:19I love you here.
42:21Jesus.
42:22I never thought I'd have a love that spans continents.
42:24I was hoping for more than a two-mile radius.
42:34Um, is Nick Lauren?
42:41You didn't have to buy these.
42:43I quite understood why you did what you did.
42:46I just got you into trouble.
42:48I nearly got you the sack.
42:50Well, you didn't.
42:51And I wasn't sacked.
42:54Neither knows.
42:56It's a bit of a, uh, goodbye present as well.
43:00What do you mean?
43:01I've got a reading week, so I thought I'd go and stay with my dad for a bit.
43:04You know, Stuart, my other dad.
43:07Why does everyone want to leave all of a sudden?
43:10I could start taking it personally.
43:12Well, I get to see my new sister and I get a change.
43:16And I can leave mum and dad to sort all this Jo stuff out.
43:19Oh, well, I don't think that's a good idea.
43:21Oh.
43:22I don't think running away is the best way to solve problems.
43:26I used to do it and it didn't end well.
43:29Well, the only thing keeping me here right now is you and Eddie.
43:33Oh, we're not going anywhere.
43:34Don't worry about that.
43:46You missed a cracking bit of food at Paul's tasting menu.
43:49Is that why you wanted to come for a drink?
43:51To tell me that?
43:54No, it isn't.
43:56I wanted to say sorry about going off at you like that.
44:01Saying what I said.
44:03I just don't like you to apologise.
44:05No, it isn't, so don't milk it.
44:07Maybe if you sang it, it would mean more.
44:08Eddie, you're my son and I love you,
44:10but you'd always be in the medals at the Twat Olympics.
44:14That's more like it.
44:15Just out of interest, when you were at school
44:17and you chose yoga over football,
44:19was that for real or was that just to wind me up?
44:21It's OK, Dad.
44:22Apology accepted.
44:25And you were right about the brewery.
44:29It hasn't worked.
44:30No, I was wrong.
44:31And to say what I said, you're doing a good job.
44:34And the truth is, it kills me, to be honest.
44:38A son good at something causes father pain.
44:41Can we just have a minute's silence to think about that?
44:43I thought I was the only one who could do it.
44:46You know, I built the place.
44:47I thought I was, well, not exactly Donald Trump,
44:50but Willy Wonka, at least.
44:51Dad, you loved that brewery and you gave it up too early.
44:55We both know that.
44:56You get the brewery back.
44:58How's about that?
44:59I don't want it back.
45:00I want to be your partner.
45:02Proper partners.
45:03We could work together.
45:04Work together?
45:05Are you insane?
45:06We can't do a crossword together
45:07without the United Nations on speed dial.
45:09Just think about it until you decide I'm right.
45:15This is good, isn't it?
45:17Father and son having a drink.
45:21When was the last time we did this?
45:251999.
45:27We argued about the Millennium Dome.
45:28Oh, yeah.
45:29I was right about that and all.
45:33You retired too early,
45:35and for all the wrong reasons.
45:38Take the brewery back.
45:40I'm done here.
45:42I promise you.
46:05Hi, Maya.
46:06Bye, Roberta.
46:07And we always remember your Antigone.
46:09Do your studies well and Facebook me.
46:11Always.
46:15Thanks for everything.
46:18Don't forget us.
46:20And thank you so much for everything you've done.
46:23I mean it, really.
46:24Thank you so much.
46:28Jo.
46:31It's okay.
46:32No, no, no, no.
46:33Jo, are you going to say goodbye to Maya now?
46:35Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye!
46:36Bye!
46:43Hey.
46:45Hey.
46:48Hey.
47:05If you work together, I tell you I'm your mom
47:08You win some, lose some, it's all the same to me
47:18The pleasure is to play, makes no difference what you say
47:26I don't show your grief, the only kind I need is the Ace of Space
47:30The Ace of Space
47:36Play it for the heart, the heart, the heart, the heart, the Ace
48:26Heavy metal, she's been teaching him heavy metal
48:29If I'd have known that, I'd have had a deported Zuna
48:50Safe journey
48:51Be safe
49:15There you are
49:17Bit of lemmy was all that it took, eh?
49:22We all want to save our children from being hurt, Paul
49:24But it's not how the world is
49:26Well, it's going to get more than enough hurt in his life, Ruff
49:29Yeah, he needs to be able to handle it
49:32What worries you?
49:35Hmm?
49:36That he can't express his feelings or that he hasn't got the feelings in the first place?
49:40I think he has feelings, Paul
49:42I think he feels so much and so deeply that he has to save himself from drowning in them
49:48And I think that's why he shuts down and that's exactly what we can't let him do
49:55Why not?
49:56What if that is what he needs in order to survive?
49:58Because the more he hides his feelings, the further away he gets from us
50:15Oh, fuck
50:42Rebecca!
50:45Can I see you for a minute, please?
50:53What is it?
50:54Just take a seat here for me, will you, love?
50:56There you go
50:59Okay, erm
51:02Listen, you've got a sex life, I know that
51:05It's fine
51:06And I don't need to know the details, but
51:16That isn't...that isn't mine
51:17Well, I'm not going to need the morning after pill, am I?
51:20Dad, it really isn't
51:21I would never not take precautions
51:23Is this what this is all about?
51:25Threatening Luke with medical records?
51:27Does he know about this?
51:28It isn't mine
51:30Look, I don't know what Stuart has been filling your head with
51:33About being a free spirit
51:35And all of that
51:36But this is real life
51:37And I don't want your real life to be ruined
51:39By some half-baked ideas that he has put into your head
51:42About having lots of babies
51:43Dad, it isn't mine
51:44Don't lie to me, love
51:50Don't lie to me
51:51Okay, this is not going to get us anywhere
51:53Then don't accuse me of something that I haven't done
51:56Hey, hey, hey, hey, what's going on?
51:58Ask him
52:00Look at that
52:03Morning after pill
52:05The morning after pill? I found it in the bin
52:07Now, look, she's going to have to talk to one of us
52:11Doesn't matter if it's me or if it's you
52:13But she's going to have to talk to one of us
52:14Okay, it's not hers, it's mine
52:16Don't cover for Alison, okay? This is...
52:19Let's go downstairs, darling
52:20Look, we've got to be honest
52:21This is important
52:23Rebecca!
52:24Hey! It's mine
52:28I took it, it's mine
52:37And I'd love to say I do
52:40You better be there
52:43But I'd never now be true
52:47So I say
52:48I think I better leave right now
52:52Before I fall any deeper
52:54I think I better leave right now
52:57Why would you do that?
53:00Because it's not the right time
53:02I haven't got the energy for another pregnancy
53:04Let alone another baby
53:05Not right now
53:05Why didn't you say anything?
53:06Why did you do it behind me back?
53:08Because you were all excited
53:10So was I for a bit
53:12But then I just thought about the reality
53:13And I just didn't have the strength to fight you about it
53:17I get that, I do
53:20I get it, the time is right for me
53:22And it's not for you
53:23I get that
53:24Yeah
53:27I mean, there will be another time, right?
53:29Yeah
53:29So, yeah
53:35Is it because you're scared that, you know, the baby will turn out like Jo?
53:40It's part of it, I think
53:43Aren't you?
53:44Uh
53:46I want two children
53:49We've got two children
54:00I want a normal child
54:01And listen, I want a father, a normal child
54:03So, there, I've said it
54:11You have indeed, yeah
54:12Hey
54:13Look, if I can't say that to you
54:15Then who can I say that to?
54:16God, you're meant to be the one person in the world
54:18That I can say stuff like that to
54:20You know, I'm exhausted
54:21I'm exhausted
54:22Now, every day, every minute
54:24I am sinking already
54:26Look how hard we had to fight for Maya
54:28Look at how we fell out over it
54:30One tiny thing goes wrong for Jo
54:33And it takes all the strength we have
54:34Christ, Paul, another baby
54:36That's the problem
54:36We've got all this energy
54:38And we've only got Jo to focus on
54:42So what, I should have another child as light relief from Jo?
54:45No, I'm not saying that
54:45I'm just saying that
54:47Look, if we overthink it
54:48Then there will never be a right time
54:51Will there?
54:59They won't, will there?
55:06No
55:08No, maybe they won't
55:13I don't
55:15There will never be a right time
55:17Because I don't want another child
55:18It's as simple as that
55:22Don't
55:22Except I do
55:23Yes, but we have Jo
55:25And he's different
55:26There's no point in pretending otherwise
55:28So...
55:29So he makes everything different for us
55:31Everything
55:33No
55:37He's your son
55:38Now listen, it's not your fucking alibi
55:42Bye
55:43Hey
55:44Hey
55:46Hey
55:50Hey
55:51Hey
55:58Hey
56:00Hey
56:00Hey
56:01Hey
56:02Hey
56:04Hey
56:07Hey
56:09Hey
56:21you and me are in the middle of 30 shades of crap right now and i hurt you you hurt
56:25me i wouldn't
56:26mind knocking about with you maurice when was the last time you asked a woman out you're always on
56:31the outside commenting on our marriage it never feels like you're actually inside it which way
56:34did he go well sir i know he went outside where did joe don't you dare talk to my son
56:39like that
56:39get out maurice you can't go shooting off up the hill on your own i lost him i'll find him
56:44we'll find him
57:07so
57:17you
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