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00:13Welcome and in the next half hour a fiery set
00:23We're watching Greg sweat
00:29And a very loose pet
00:38So let's commence the cock-ups
00:42It's deadly 60 presented by Steve back shawl he and his crew are in Uganda
00:47Looking for mountain gorillas, and they have to be quiet as the slightest noise could scare them off. I
00:54Can see the bushes moving just ahead of us
00:57Kind of shaking our half with excitement and half with a little bit of trepidation
01:02You know when I watched gorillas in the mist I never thought about what that mist was
01:16Yes, I think I can hear that
01:24For animals who don't like noise. They certainly make plenty of it
01:32Plastic I wouldn't make fun of them Steve
01:44Yeah, that's quite a left hook I'm quite glad it didn't go a couple of inches to the right
01:52Bad education where comedy is a serious business. No other cast could be this straight-faced when it comes to
01:58singing the word microwave
02:09I'm so sorry
02:18Love Island and it's going to be another sunny day so sunny that everyone is already wearing their sunglasses
02:24I hope they don't struggle to see what they're doing
02:32I wonder what's more painful a broken heart or a stubbed toe
02:43Plebs and they say Rome wasn't built in a day and by the looks of things this scene wasn't filmed
02:48in a day either
02:49They wake up in the morning
02:52Kiss me
02:53Kiss me
02:55I didn't certainly
02:58Sorry
02:59Come on lads, keep it together, you Roman soldiers
03:03Alright, no one dies from green balm, okay?
03:05Of course they do, I've got bum rot mate
03:07I've got a classic case of bum rot
03:11To finish filming you may need less funny lines
03:16In two doors down, I'm slightly suspicious that this prop wine might actually be real wine
03:23Here, Eric, can I ask you a question
03:28What?
03:30What's my next line?
03:35The BBC's hugely successful sitcom Ghosts, written by the all-star cast
03:40But when you've written it yourself, you only have yourself to blame
03:44As there haven't been any dead bear attacks in this house in the last 600 years
03:48I'm going to go out on a limb and say there's probably not about to be one come crashing down
03:53I'm going to say that again
03:54I'm going to go out on a limb and say there's not about to be a bear come crashing down
04:06Whoa, who made that?
04:08You all did
04:12Billy and Greg, the family diaries
04:14And it can be gruelling filming a TV show, can't it?
04:18Well, no, not really, not in the Maldives
04:21You haven't put them on properly mate, have you? Do you want me to sort it out for you?
04:24One's at the back but one's at the back
04:26Oh, one's at the back
04:29Hold on
04:33I hope the film crew took out travel insurance
04:38What happened there? I'll put it on the stand
04:42I'm no expert, but I'd say that tall camera mount made it a bit top-heavy
04:49Dad
04:50It's broke
04:51Oh my God
04:54Oh, it's not the right footwear to be doing this in
04:56I think you might be better off in flippers
05:00Oh no, hang on, I think I broke the bike
05:11Some food-based fiascos now, just please let me know in advance if you have any allergies
05:16I've got a house, babe
05:17No
05:17I'll tell you later on
05:19Here's some chocolate ones coming out
05:21Lovely
05:22Are they a bit burnt?
05:24A little bit scorched
05:26I didn't want to say anything
05:28No, I got in before you
05:32I've seen more edible-looking rocks on the Giant's Causeway
05:37How long were they in the oven for?
05:39They're supposed to be in for 10 minutes, 10 to 12 minutes
05:41And what were they in for?
05:43Slightly longer
05:44I was making these other ones
05:49Anyway
05:49Then I'll wait for the second batch
05:51I don't want to break a filling
05:54Have they been in there since 7am?
05:56Not at all
05:57They will do have 20...
06:0026 minutes, pal
06:02Alan, you...
06:05Oh, it's not a little bit
06:07You might recognise our next guest
06:09The great Alan Carr
06:11Alan Carr has come in to talk about the new series of Picture Slam
06:14Though one of the questions is about durian
06:16The fruit that apparently tastes of vomit
06:18You have to try some, shall we?
06:20No, I can't try that smell
06:22It's getting me right
06:25Tell me what it's like
06:26And if it's nice, I'll try
06:27No, I'm not having it
06:28It looks horrible
06:28It looks like scrambled egg, doesn't it?
06:31Oh, good
06:31Is it nice?
06:33Is it not nice?
06:34Do you know
06:35I don't think I've ever tried durian
06:36I can't imagine why
06:41That is awful
06:42That's that
06:44Do you want to try to get rid of it?
06:46Yeah, get rid
06:46Yeah, it's a tissue
06:48We did have a tissue, but don't worry
06:50Oh, sorry
06:51Sorry
06:51Sorry, I thought I was back at home
06:54I'm sorry
06:54I can't try it
06:56Alan
06:56I feel bad about being sick behind your sofa
06:59I'll clean it up
07:00I'm not expecting
07:01What is that smell?
07:02It's so bad
07:02Alan, remind me never to peek behind the sofa at your house
07:06With a tissue, I think I can smell it
07:08Oh, why can I do that?
07:10Anyway, it's so good to see you
07:11Yeah, isn't it?
07:12It's so lovely to see you
07:14It's like I've come in here and trumped
07:17Alan is now wishing his quiz producers had written a nice question about croissants
07:21Oh, so much fun
07:24In Australia, they are celebrating lamingtons
07:27A treat that is actually a bit of a mouthful
07:29Welcome back
07:31Welcome back
07:31Well, with soft sponge and choc coconut
07:33Choc
07:36Let's just rewind to the top of that and start again
07:39Welcome back to the morning show
07:41What does that taste like?
07:41With soft sponge and choc coconut goodness
07:44Lamingtons are an iconic national treasure that all Aussies love
07:49Now stop it, guys
07:51Behave
07:53It is
07:53It's National Lamington Day
07:55It's what Lamington Day behave, Sally
07:57Yes, quite
07:59Morning
08:00Are you coming in then?
08:02Let me just take my shoes off, James
08:06Make sure when it arrives you make sure you get a short rib of beef
08:09Short rib of beef as well
08:11Right, and then we've got the muscles
08:14Amazing, that
08:16I've lost a spoon in there, Chef, but I'm sure we'll dig it out eventually
08:19Waiter, there's a spoon in my beef
08:21Right
08:22Special sounds
08:23There you go
08:23There you go
08:26That one's gone in there again
08:27Do you want to grab that one for me again?
08:31Can we get some more spoons, guys?
08:34Because we're seems to be cooking more than we're using, sir
08:37I'm not going to put this one down
08:38Right
08:40This is Glenn Finnell
08:41This is the first time and the last time you'll see me
08:43It's been absolutely fantastic, sir
08:46I think he's after the silver
08:47Check his pockets on the way out
08:49I'll need you
08:52Prue needs Cotswold Kitchen
08:54A charming, soothing programme
08:56That's the perfect antidote to the high drama of the Bake Off tent
09:00Unless you work behind the scenes
09:01Sorry
09:07Bless you
09:08Sorry, darling
09:09I deliberately turned away
09:12In order not to infect them
09:14And blasted you
09:18Sorry, if she goes down, we know who's fault
09:21Sarah, do you need a cloth?
09:23People talk about the Hollywood handshake
09:25No-one ever mentions the achoo from Prue
09:28We'll just mix these ingredients together
09:29Back to Ireland
09:31Where Catherine is up to her old tricks
09:33And Tommy, when are you going to start your sourdough?
09:36I heard you talking to Terina
09:38Oh, here, Catherine
09:39That's how much is on there
09:40What's going on?
09:45What's going on?
09:47What's going on?
09:52You're on fire
09:52Stop that
09:53It's on fire
09:55I can't be blown
09:56It's a hole in his system
09:59How'd that happen?
10:01The fire lamp's gonna grow
10:07Has anyone actually checked to see if Catherine is really a chef?
10:11Pour some soup into your bowls there, Tommy.
10:13Yeah, go on, go get the bread out of the thing.
10:15We're just having a heart attack for the second time in a month, I've caused havoc in the kitchen.
10:19It might be safer next time to order in.
10:22I think you had the hub on.
10:24I had it on there over that one.
10:26Are you sure about that, Catherine, or did you cook the other pan by accident?
10:29Our soup is freezing cold.
10:31It's not.
10:31It is.
10:33If we were having that, it would be roasted.
10:37But it wasn't in there, so it's ice cold.
10:40Show us the bacon paper.
10:44Catherine, can you look through it?
10:45Peek-a-boo.
10:57TV experts on the way, such as this entertainment reporter Craigie B. What he doesn't know about showbiz just isn't
11:04worth knowing.
11:05We'll be a pivot.
11:05Break out the girl power because I've got hugely exciting news.
11:09It's regarding Victoria Beckham, the one and only former posh spies.
11:13But what will spice up this report?
11:18Find out after the break.
11:42It's regarding Victoria Beckham, the one and only former posh spies in another life, of course.
11:49Well, hang on.
11:52I think my tooth is about to fall out.
11:55Uh-oh.
11:57Craigie!
11:59Craigie!
12:00Are you okay?
12:02No, I'm not.
12:03My tooth...
12:04What did you do?
12:05Did you bite into something?
12:07I did.
12:09I can't believe it.
12:12I can't believe it either.
12:15We've lost a tooth, people.
12:17It's like 33 and we've lost a tooth.
12:23Richard Arnold, our very own TV expert, has a Netflix exclusive.
12:29He's cordially inviting us to his very own Bridgerton Balls Up.
12:33Season three, part two is almost upon us.
12:36Fans have been stressfully waiting for the second half of season three to come out.
12:38And yesterday, Netflix sent everyone into a tizzy by releasing the trailer for part two of said season.
12:43And just to whet your lady down whistle...
12:45Your lady down whistle?
12:47Yes, lady whistle down.
12:48Anyway, that's out there forever.
12:52Richard, that sounds too raunchy, even for Bridgerton.
12:55It suddenly goes sour.
12:56I'll leave now.
12:57Carriage for Richard.
13:02Entertainment expert Ria Hebden is helping Lorraine find something to watch.
13:06And they are all great recommendations, but not quite what Lorraine is after.
13:11But if you're looking for something a little bit lighter, Alan Carr's Changing Ends.
13:14We absolutely love him.
13:16This is such a lovely comedy-drama about his actual life and how challenging it was growing up...
13:23Oh, this is great.
13:24...with his lovely dad, who was the professional football manager.
13:28Oh, there's wee doggies over there.
13:29And now they're all going a bit brown, aren't they?
13:31Do you know what it is?
13:32It's a border-terrier!
13:33A border-terrorist is so apt when it's angers when we're eating.
13:38Forget the telly, Lorraine just wants to watch the dogs.
13:41I know, they're just having a little chat, aren't they?
13:43Letting us know.
13:43And, you know, a frank and fool discussion of life with the dogs.
13:47And later, there will be a frank and fool discussion over who had the idea to go live outside.
13:55On this morning, Dr Rangan Chatterjee is there to talk about his latest book,
13:59which promises to lead to a calmer, happier you.
14:02So, why is Vernon so stressed out?
14:05But the other big thing, I think, that we get wrong, guys, is that we confuse happiness with success.
14:10Right? Many of us think we're chasing.
14:12I'm going to have to interject you there, because we've got to go to the local weather,
14:14which is a hard count, which means we've got to do it in about four seconds.
14:17Well, the book is available. Thank you very much for coming.
14:18Here's the weather wherever you are in the country.
14:20It's good to talk, but don't talk for too long.
14:26Perhaps Vernon needs this.
14:28Here, exercise expert Lena is demonstrating the latest craze of puppy yoga.
14:33Ah, I'm feeling more relaxed already.
14:36OK, David's taking the cuddle path.
14:40So, can you show me how to combine some yoga moves?
14:45But I think someone is a little too zen.
14:48I think we're going...
14:50Oh, no, I think we've got a toilet coming.
14:52We're dropping a two.
14:53We're dropping a two.
14:54We've got a...
14:54We've got a toilet situation.
14:55Come on, everyone.
14:58Anyone got a bag?
14:59OK.
15:02Let's get into some downward dog.
15:04Yeah, we're just doing a little...
15:06How much...
15:07Why is so much coming out of you?
15:09It's made of your body weight.
15:11Anyway, we're distracted.
15:13Oh, my God.
15:15I mean...
15:16It's less downward-facing dog and more downward-facing log.
15:20Just keep going, Lena.
15:21I'll sort this out after here.
15:22Ah!
15:23It's still coming!
15:23Oh, God!
15:25There's so much...
15:26Well, if you will call your show today extra, extra is what you get.
15:30Get some zen.
15:31It's like an ice-cream machine back there, you guys.
15:35There we go.
15:37Lena, what are you spitting these dogs before the class?
15:39Sorry, I can't.
15:40Oh, please don't eat it.
15:42No, OK.
15:43I bet this never happens to Gwynny Paltrow.
15:55Cock-ups on entertainment shows now, as we join Ant and Dec recording a link with their crew in South
16:02Africa.
16:02The Australian crew make them do their links live, so everyone can go home on time.
16:08And as their first morning arrived, they were walking by the crow...
16:12Crow?
16:13Crow?
16:14Crow?
16:14Crow?
16:14Crow?
16:15Crow?
16:15Crow?
16:16Cry?
16:16Cry?
16:17Cry?
16:17If at first you don't succeed, cry, cry again.
16:20Better.
16:24In for a penny are in Chester.
16:26But if Stephen's not careful, we'll be seeing a lot more than his loose change.
16:30You fly so well in time.
16:31Stephen, we almost saw your magic wand.
16:34They're all laughing behind the cameras, because they think I'm going to be embarrassed.
16:37Well, do you know what?
16:39I'm not.
16:41Cheeky.
16:43Love Island.
16:44And in every episode, there's always the iconic catchphrase that cancels the cracking on and gets everyone's attention.
16:51I've got a text.
16:53Oh, no.
16:54I think my phone's too hot.
16:56It says shutting down.
16:58Too hot for Love Island.
17:03Unforgivable, where Mel's guests reveal the worst things they've ever done, but co-host Lou wants to reveal something of
17:09her own.
17:10I'm going to be summarising by doing a Shakespeare sonnet.
17:14I love that.
17:16To compare thee to a doctor is not...
17:22A little extract there for the front row.
17:24Is she wearing any pants?
17:28Lou, the whole of your backside was revealed there.
17:32Well, Lou was doing Shakespeare.
17:34Perhaps she was just giving the audience her bottom.
17:37Oh, it was literally up there.
17:39It got hoiked on your, erm...
17:42What?
17:42On your, erm...
17:43Fucking last series.
17:44Something.
17:45It was brilliant.
17:46I sort of think it worked.
17:48I love the looseness.
17:51It's David Mitchell's Outsiders, where comedians Guz Khan and Judy Love are competing as a pair to win survival challenges.
17:59But will they survive each other?
18:02Yay.
18:02Chris talks a lot of...
18:08That's what he'd be talking.
18:13Guzz!
18:14Don't hold back!
18:15What do you really think?
18:20I'm just trying to not digest...
18:22Don't really, don't really...
18:24What was that song?
18:27You...
18:29Poor Judy.
18:30Only did this show to get some fresh air.
18:32You don't have to re-play that camera, mate.
18:34Yes, reposition it to another county.
18:37Blow it away.
18:38If that...
18:39Listen.
18:40We are the most fartiest couple.
18:46And on Never Mind the Buzzcocks, host Greg Davies shows that there's one task he can't master, and that's reading
18:52this question about Peter Andre.
18:54Or C. Showing off in front of the...
18:59I'm sorry.
19:01Professional.
19:03Or was it C?
19:04Showing off...
19:07It's what Peter was doing that makes me laugh.
19:11D. Showing off in front of the crew, Peter tried to do that dance move where you hold your leg
19:16up and jump through...
19:18...with your other leg, but he fell into a World War I memorial fountaine.
19:22I'm sorry.
19:25I'm sorry.
19:30C. Showing off in front of the crew, Peter tried to do that dance move where you hold your leg
19:35up and jump through it with your other leg.
19:36But he fell into a World War I memorial fountaine.
19:40Success!
19:41And the audience give a cheer of pride.
19:43Or is that just relief?
19:46I hope you're watching this, Mum.
19:55Thanks to all the stars and production teams who shared their funny mistakes with us tonight.
19:59Before we go, let's take a moment to appreciate Richard Maidley.
20:03He's an author, an agony uncle, and most importantly, the other half to Judy.
20:08But I don't think he'll be getting a job in a phone shop any time soon.
20:12I'm going to show you how to do that.
20:13Obviously, open your phone, go to the main menu page and click on your camera, OK?
20:18Open the camera.
20:19Point the camera there at the QR code and a little yellow kind of widget will come up at the
20:26bottom.
20:26Press... Oh, that's gone.
20:27Do it again. Just a minute.
20:29You can do it, Richard.
20:31I'm going to go back in again.
20:32There we go.
20:33And you press that and you take the picture and then it will basically open up.
20:38It's...
20:38Oh, hang on, I'll do it one more.
20:39No, it keeps going.
20:40I knew this would happen.
20:41Yes, I think I knew it would happen too.
20:44Take a picture.
20:45There we go.
20:47Guys, T-Rex would have done better.
20:50Oh, Richard, I know this campaign is all about pledging time, but I think you're pledging it in the wrong
20:55place.
20:56Well, anyway, you press the yellow button and do it quite quickly, otherwise it goes away.
21:01That was my mistake, though.
21:02I was too busy talking.
21:03Shall I come and have a look?
21:04Do the yellow button and then you'll get all the options will come up on the screen of what you...
21:08How you can donate.
21:09How many minutes you can donate.
21:10Hand it over.
21:11Hand it over.
21:12Let's see.
21:12That's it.
21:13Charlotte to the rescue.
21:14Right, there we go.
21:15So we go into the camera.
21:16You go quite far away from there.
21:19Click on that.
21:21Oh, it's normophobic.
21:22You're in portrait mode.
21:23That's right.
21:24There you go.
21:26And it comes up with how much would you like to pledge.
21:28So there we go.
21:29And it's got the total there as well.
21:31So shall I hand it back to you?
21:32There you go.
21:33Well done.
21:34We'll spend some of your time.
21:35We love you, Richard.
21:36Don't ever change.
21:38Thanks for watching and goodnight.
21:40Thank you, Richard.
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