- 1 minute ago
APEX Cartoon Props & Novelties - A pair of cartoon villains sneak into the APEX factory, where all the great cartoon devices are made. They also, unfortunately, experience them all firsthand.
A Cop and His Donut - A rookie cop investigates a bank robbery where his veteran partner is injured. He then ends up meeting his partner's partner: a living, talking donut. The donut and the rookie are then forced to work together to capture the bank robbers.
Enchanted Adventures - A knight with a transforming sword must match wits with an evil sorcerer to save his village from a plague.
Coming Attraction: Super Santa: Jingle Bell Justice
Note: It was originally titled "Galen and Kalibron" (Prod. Code: YEA-601).
Originally aired on August 30, 1998
Did anybody notice that Donut sounds a lot like Yosemite Sam?!
A Cop and His Donut - A rookie cop investigates a bank robbery where his veteran partner is injured. He then ends up meeting his partner's partner: a living, talking donut. The donut and the rookie are then forced to work together to capture the bank robbers.
Enchanted Adventures - A knight with a transforming sword must match wits with an evil sorcerer to save his village from a plague.
Coming Attraction: Super Santa: Jingle Bell Justice
Note: It was originally titled "Galen and Kalibron" (Prod. Code: YEA-601).
Originally aired on August 30, 1998
Did anybody notice that Donut sounds a lot like Yosemite Sam?!
Category
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TVTranscript
00:08This is an example of laughing.
00:17Oh yeah, cartoons!
00:20Wait a minute, I don't like milk.
00:21Oh yeah!
00:22Guess what?
00:24It's time for Oh Yeah, cartoons!
00:26Oh yeah!
00:28Oh yeah!
00:30Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah!
00:38You're watching Oh Yeah Cartoons!
00:40What's with me?
00:59Free sample of ultra-sweet chicken feed.
01:25Do you have days like this?
01:28Hello there, I'm Cletus Apex, owner and general manager of Apex Cartoon Props and Novelties Company.
01:35Our goal is to provide plot options in the form of high-quality props and devices for every situation.
01:42Scissors, please.
01:51The Mobile Target X, an Apex original.
01:56So don't be a willing victim of cartoon slapstick comedy.
01:59Order from Apex.
02:03This calls for the Apex Predator Emergency System.
02:17Apex products are the best to rip yourself of a cartoon pest.
02:21So if a wolf comes to your door, remember...
02:24Apex products are for Apex, Apex!
02:27Wow, the mute button works good!
02:31It's not fair!
02:33That disgusting factory makes hundreds of products for the goody goodies and cartoons.
02:37But what about us villains?
02:39We should have access to those neat gadgets.
02:42And we will.
02:43We'll disguise ourselves as tourists, sneak into the factory, and help ourselves to all those marvelous goodies.
02:50Let's go, Possum.
02:51I think the channel selector is broken!
02:55Welcome to Apex Cartoon Props and Novelties!
02:58After you know I work, you know that Apex products can be very non-pleasure-producing to the unsuspecting.
03:05So, after we begin our tour, I must request that...
03:10One, everyone stay with the group.
03:12And two, don't touch anything.
03:16Now, follow me, please.
03:18Keep behind the red line.
03:28The three-dimensional painted exterior.
03:31It comes with a customized animated projection lore, and is available in many favorite variations.
03:38Like the tunnel portal, the endless highway, and the hallway of many doors.
03:47Yeah, right.
03:48It's easy to fool someone who carries his brains in a thimble.
03:51But what do you do with a smart guy like me, who can't be fooled with a crude painting like
03:57that?
03:58I push this button.
04:01The Hydraulic Villain Swatter option.
04:04Another Apex exclusive.
04:05Now, if you will follow me to the next room.
04:16I wasn't fooled a bit.
04:18Come on, let's catch up with the tour.
04:20Oh, oh, oh, oh, look, Fox.
04:22Look, look, look.
04:23A whole room full of doors.
04:25Can I look at him, Fox?
04:26Can I, can I?
04:27Please, please, please, please, please, can I?
04:28You don't.
04:29You can't go in there.
04:30It's just a...
04:30Why, sure, Possum.
04:33Go right ahead.
04:35Run right in there.
04:37Boink, horsey.
04:38Go.
04:40Whoa.
04:44Look at that one, you kindergarten dropout.
04:47It says explosions.
04:48Do you want to get us blown up?
04:51Here, sports.
04:52Ah, this one seems safe enough.
04:54Hmm, what kind of sport is this?
04:57Uh-oh.
05:01I always did hate that game.
05:04Transportation?
05:06Good.
05:06Let's get out of here before we get hurt some more.
05:12Whoa!
05:13Me to live?
05:14Sure.
05:15You gotta help pump.
05:17Ah, forget it.
05:17I'll wait for the train.
05:19Suit yourself.
05:21Go ahead.
05:23Work yourself into a sweat.
05:24I hear the train coming already.
05:33Hey, hey, Fox.
05:35I took the train back.
05:36It was cool.
05:39That's it.
05:40I'm not moving from here until someone comes and finds us.
05:45Oh, there you are.
05:47You're supposed to stay with the group.
05:49Come along.
05:49The tour is almost over.
05:51But, uh, but, uh, we were, uh, not...
05:54I mean, uh, the doors...
05:56Just don't touch anything.
05:58Now this is our main product warehouse.
06:00After manufacturing testing, the finished items are packaged and sent here for storage before shipping.
06:07Off to my left, we store all explosive products.
06:10This includes our ever-popular boom-in-a-box.
06:13To my right are all the products that are mechanically driven.
06:17Below this room is our guard animal quarters.
06:21And above this room is our anvil storage silo.
06:31Pump them up and send them outside for their free samples.
06:34Thank you and come again.
06:36Remember, Apex products are the best.
06:46Hey, I have free samples for you that will surely help you attain your predatory goals.
06:52Be sure to read the operating instructions before use.
06:55Eggs?
06:56A chicken?
06:58Trades?
06:59The exploding eggs are to be placed in a nest box to secure the chicken of your choice.
07:04And the exploding rooster is used to rid yourself of the hand-guarding of a nest of eggs.
07:11So don't settle for inferior products from that other company.
07:15Remember the Apex name.
07:17For all your cartoon device needs.
07:19That's the Apex Props and Novelties Company, not responsible for user error.
07:24Oh, wow.
07:26The mute on that remote sure works good.
07:32Oh, yeah, cartoons!
07:34The difference between cartoon animals and real-life animals is that cartoon animals drop anvils.
07:40My dog can't talk with people's voices.
07:44Real-life animals just sit there and then fish.
07:47They're really boring!
07:50When a cartoon goes into my brain tissue, zaps through my eyes and into my optic nerve and into my
07:56oogashglock.
07:57Right now, OEA is reciting in my oogashglock.
08:01Oogashglock.
08:01It's like an imprint in my brain.
08:03Oh, my God!
08:18I can't believe my luck!
08:21My first day on the job.
08:23And already I got my first bank robbery, my first partner, and my first donut.
08:31I'm finally a real cop.
08:34Hey, Bud, if you're not going to eat that...
08:37Huh?
08:39What are you, crazy?
08:41Some donuts aren't for eating, kid.
08:44Bud's real sensitive about that donut, kid.
08:47Had it for years.
08:49Okay, partner?
08:50Okay, partner!
08:54I can't believe my luck.
08:57All the loose ends tied together.
08:59Everything going like clockwork.
09:01We're safe.
09:02We're covered.
09:03And in walks the whole bank stand.
09:06And why?
09:07I forgot to wipe my wads.
09:10So it's 9 a.m. instead of 5.
09:16It's all right, Lou.
09:17With these hostages, the cops can't touch us.
09:20They'd have to be crazy to try.
09:22We know you're in there.
09:24Let the hostages go.
09:26If you let the...
09:27Hey, Bud, stop hogging the binoculars.
09:30Here you go, kid.
09:31Exciting, isn't it, Bud?
09:34Bud?
09:35Bud, no!
09:37I hope you know what we're doing.
09:50Let's get out of here.
09:52Bud, are you okay?
09:55Oh, no!
09:57What happened here?
10:00What's that?
10:02Speak up!
10:05He pushed us out of the way at the last second.
10:08Then he went back for the donut.
10:15Any change?
10:17No.
10:20Help!
10:22I'm suffocating!
10:23Bud, you're awake!
10:25Nurse!
10:26Nurse!
10:27No, not Bud!
10:28Down here!
10:30In his hand!
10:31Get me out of here!
10:33Oh!
10:35That's better!
10:36I can breathe again!
10:40I'm seeing things.
10:42It must be the stress.
10:44Stress?
10:44I'm the one who almost got crushed!
10:48Hey!
10:49Is that any way to treat your new partner?
10:51Partner?
10:52This man is my partner.
10:55This man is a vegetable.
10:57Yeah.
10:58Well, you're a pastry.
11:00So are you, you cream puff.
11:03I'm arguing with a donut.
11:05I need medical attention.
11:07Yes, you do.
11:09I'll go get a straitjacket.
11:12Bud's the most decorated cop in the city.
11:15Who do you think actually solved all those cases?
11:18Shut up.
11:19Where we going, partner?
11:21I'm gonna catch those pink robbers.
11:23As for you...
11:25Here you go, senior citizen.
11:28Live it up.
11:28You'll regret this.
11:30Bud needed me, and so will you.
11:35Give it up, old-timer.
11:43Yes, I...
11:44Yeah, I came to join up.
11:47I thought you could use some help.
11:56Just what I thought.
11:58A cop.
11:59What's the matter, kid?
12:01Forget your partner.
12:03Donut delivery.
12:05Get you free donuts.
12:07Hey, boss, you want a donut?
12:09I would love one.
12:11Hmm, let's see.
12:13I'll try this one.
12:29I've come to join up.
12:32We don't need any help.
12:34But I like your looks.
12:37Welcome to the gang.
12:38Your first job is to keep an eye on this cop,
12:41while all of us, for no apparent reason,
12:43go into the other room.
12:45Shh.
12:45I can't believe it.
12:47Shh.
12:48I can't believe they bought that getup.
12:52Master of disguise, kid.
12:54I thought you'd snuck in in that box of donuts.
12:57Hmm.
12:58Never thought of that.
12:59And do have some coffee and donuts.
13:04Boss, he ain't human.
13:07And he ain't crooked either.
13:09He's police pastry.
13:12Get him, boys.
13:13He's police.
13:13Heeey-yah!
13:18Knives, guns, we're criminals.
13:21We should have these things handy.
13:39Heeey-yah!
14:02Drop it, sleazeball.
14:06You're surrounded.
14:14Raining! Away!
14:17Hang in there, partner.
14:24You know, kid, most people just order them new.
14:28Well, here you go.
14:32Hey, you're awake. How do you feel?
14:36Freshly baked.
14:37That you are.
14:39Ah! What kind of butcher did you take me to?
14:43Not a butcher. A baker, you old troublemaker.
14:46Your particular shade of stale brown is hard to match.
14:50Who you calling stale? You undercooked with me!
14:57Cartoons!
14:58If you watch a cartoon that's bad for your brain,
15:00radiation gets sucked through your eyeballs,
15:02it disintegrates the brain tissue,
15:05and certain nerve functions.
15:06Oh, yeah!
15:07And the cerebellum.
15:08There could be a burning order.
15:09I suggest you go to your doctor immediately.
15:13The difference between cartoons and reality is...
15:17I'm not a cartoon.
15:18Not true.
15:19In reality, everything is real.
15:21Cartoons turn your mind to mush.
15:23Everything happens in real life.
15:25That can't happen!
15:26It wasn't me!
15:27It wasn't me!
15:28It wasn't me!
15:29It wasn't me!
15:56It was a special ingredient.
15:57They needed the blood of Kaltor,
15:59the most feared dragon in the land.
16:01My army had been decimated by the plague,
16:04leaving me no choice but to send my inexperienced son Galen
16:07on this most important quest.
16:12I was told that King William was a wise king.
16:15Oh, he is.
16:16Then why did he send a teenage boy to fight a dragon with an old sword?
16:21I have spent years training as a knight and this is no ordinary sword.
16:25Calabron is a special sword that's been handed down in my family for generations.
16:28What's so special about it?
16:31Watch!
16:33Boomerang!
16:50Just don't try to win Kaltor over with flowers.
16:59No!
17:10Are you ready to give up yet?
17:14Big shield.
17:15Very, very big shield!
17:24Big battle axe!
17:31Calabron?
17:35I don't believe we've been formally introduced.
17:39I'm Galen.
17:40Sir Galen of the court of King William.
17:43And why?
17:43Sir!
17:44Galen, would you want me dead?
17:46I've done nothing against you.
17:48My father's kingdom has been afflicted with a plague.
17:51I need your blood for the antidote.
17:54Plague!
17:56There is no plague.
17:57Then why is everyone sick?
17:59Someone is poisoned!
18:01You're water wells.
18:02Who told you that my blood would cure this plague?
18:06Brangwen?
18:06She's right...
18:09The alchemist Zim sent his daughter, Brangwen, to my father's castle.
18:13Zim?
18:14Ah, of course.
18:17Do you know him?
18:18I know him by another name.
18:21Which would be Borg?
18:21The evil troll?
18:23Ah, it's impossible.
18:25His daughter is far too beautiful.
18:28Yes, she's a babe.
18:29She took after her mother.
18:30This whole thing, the plague, was just a hoax to get you to distract me.
18:35Distract you?
18:36From what?
18:37Ah, from guarding the Ebro crystal.
18:40The Ebro crystal?
18:42Can it really turn inanimate objects to life?
18:45Oh, that of more.
18:47Yeah!
18:49Five centuries and that crystal has never left my side.
18:53You show up, but it's gone.
18:56You must go to Borg's hideout and get the crystal back.
19:03It's so amusing to play with something new.
19:06Just look at what this crystal can do.
19:13Ah!
19:15Sir Galen, the lad with his sword.
19:17I'm so glad you're here.
19:18I was just getting bored.
19:22Ah!
19:25Ah!
19:26Ah!
19:27Ah ha ha ha!
19:28Caledron!
19:33So, that has some clever tricks,
19:36but time has come for us to mix.
19:41Ah!
19:44Ah!
19:45Ah!
19:48Jeez!
19:51Kill Embron!
20:17He who fights and runs away shall live to make his enemies pay!
20:29Lance!
20:41Telebron!
20:58Telebron! To the clouds!
21:13Oh no, what have I done?
21:19Telebron!
21:29Pork!
21:37It's time for us to take a cruise while you learn how it feels to lose!
21:54To the clouds!
22:02To the clouds!
22:18Oh, yeah, cartoons.
22:20Coming soon on Oh, yeah, cartoons.
22:23Santa, is everything all right?
22:25I'm afraid not, dear wife.
22:27There's trouble in our fair city.
22:30People in danger.
22:31Children scared.
22:34That look in your eye tells me we're in for some action.
22:37Quick, under the mistletoe.
22:45To the Santa slave.
22:54Oh, yeah.
23:01Oh, yeah.
23:08Oh, yeah.
23:13Oh, yeah.
23:16Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah.
23:46Oh yeah, oh yeah.
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