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00:00MUSIC
00:23Hello and welcome to It's Clarkson on TV,
00:28which is a TV show where I review things that I've seen on television.
00:33Now, I should warn you at the outset that from time to time,
00:37things do get a bit smutty and laboratorial.
00:39There's no way round it.
00:41Even on the Festival of Tears,
00:43when Meghan Markle was interviewed by Oprah Winfrey,
00:47there was a moment where Meghan seemed...
00:49How can I put this politely?
00:52..to break wind?
00:54LAUGHTER
00:57What was that, six, seven months after our wedding?
01:00Uh-huh.
01:03Sorry, can we just hear that again?
01:06Because it really does sound like Piers Morgan had a point.
01:09Her pants really were on fire.
01:12The shopping was...
01:13What was that, six, seven months after our wedding?
01:16Uh-huh.
01:17LAUGHTER
01:19Now, I've had a note here from the legal department at ITV.
01:25Uh, they want it to be made plain that that was not a fart.
01:30I have no idea how they know that.
01:32Uh, but they want me to make it clear that, uh,
01:35the fart noise probably came out of Oprah's mouth.
01:40LAUGHTER
01:40Right, so I've done that, so we can move on to Bridgerton,
01:44which opened with a horse and cart pulling up outside an agreeable house.
01:49All TV period dramas do this.
01:51It's a sort of coded warning to men
01:53that they will not enjoy any of what follows.
01:56LAUGHTER
01:57It's a sign that no-one is going to point at a radar screen
02:00and say, sir, you're going to want to see this.
02:03We've got hostiles inbound.
02:04Secure the perimeter!
02:06LAUGHTER
02:07When a horse and carriage pulls up,
02:09you know none of that is going to happen.
02:14LAUGHTER
02:22But this Regency drama was different.
02:25Not just because they left the yellow lines in.
02:27Er, no.
02:29LAUGHTER
02:30If you thought there were some strange noises in the Meghan interview,
02:34you should hear some of the sounds the actors made in Bridgerton
02:37once they'd found somewhere to park the horse.
02:40I mean, just watch this bit, OK?
02:42With your eyes shut.
02:44LAUGHTER
02:56Was that the mixed doubles at Wimbledon?
02:59LAUGHTER
03:00No, it's a man trying to pass a kidney stone.
03:03LAUGHTER
03:04Anyway, while you were watching that period sex,
03:07I was captivated by this.
03:11They're everywhere.
03:13In our shopping centres,
03:14our transport stations,
03:17all across the globe.
03:19Now, you might think they were using that Jason Bourne music
03:22to make an extremely dull topic seem dramatic.
03:26LAUGHTER
03:26This turned out to be the most exciting programme I've ever seen.
03:33Footage has emerged of escalators spiralling out of control
03:37and meet the people who know what it's like to be eaten by an escalator.
03:43This can happen to anybody anywhere in the world.
03:47LAUGHTER
03:49A subtle message there from the Anti-Obesity Society.
03:54Use the stairs.
03:56Now, another show I love is Countryfile.
03:59It's their complete lack of ambition that's so endearing.
04:03I mean, the other week,
04:04after the rather wonderful Adam Henson
04:06had casually hit a lamb with a stick,
04:09Matt Baker took his super-neat side-parting
04:12into the garden to show us how to build a pond.
04:23No, lost him.
04:26LAUGHTER
04:28And there you have your own little watery haven.
04:32The wildlife will turn up before you know it.
04:35What wildlife?
04:37It's a plastic washing-up bowl with some gravel in it.
04:41The thing is, though,
04:42I suspect they were planning a rather elaborate lake
04:45with fountains and water lilies,
04:47but yet again,
04:48the Countryfile team blew the show's entire budget
04:51on GAC and hookers.
04:53LAUGHTER
04:56They're famous throughout the BBC for doing it.
05:00Sorry, I've just had another note from the legal team at ITV.
05:06Oh, apparently that's fine.
05:10LAUGHTER
05:13No.
05:14There's a note here from the BBC.
05:18Don't know what I'm supposed to do with that.
05:20LAUGHTER
05:23So, um...
05:25Let's stick with Countryfile then, shall we?
05:27Because, has anyone noticed that Matt Baker doesn't know what the word excited means?
05:34Because I think he uses it when he means boring.
05:38Colin, this is the chosen site then.
05:40This is the site.
05:41It's very exciting, actually, to wander across it down knowing what it will become.
05:44So, what we don't want to do is rip off a lot of branches when they come down.
05:48I'm going to guide it down.
05:49You're going to guide it down.
05:50See what happens.
05:51Let's go for it.
05:52Good luck. Cheers.
05:53I'm excited.
05:54How much will you get involved and how much will you kind of leave them be?
05:58The idea is that most of the management will be on a visual basis.
06:02Our intervention form will be minimal.
06:04Let's see what nature does.
06:06Exciting, isn't it?
06:07Would there have been, like, a house and what have you in here?
06:10There would have been houses, probably grain storage inside this enclosure.
06:15When you know what was here, you can sort of feel something, can't you?
06:19It's just so... it's so exciting.
06:22He also has a habit of describing things that aren't fantastic as fantastic.
06:28Oh, yes.
06:30We'll have a bit of that.
06:31Fantastic.
06:32I've been on you two.
06:33This looks fantastic fun.
06:35What are you going to do?
06:36Fantastic.
06:39Fantastic.
06:39Fantastic.
06:42What Matt says most of all, though, is the low-church, granny-friendly expression.
06:48Oh, my word.
06:49Although I think what he means to say is, just shoot me.
06:54This is the first batch of the year.
06:56Really?
06:57Yeah.
06:57Oh, my word.
06:58And now you're entering into the Roman farmstead.
07:01Oh, my word.
07:02He's an American hound.
07:03Right.
07:04And he's six years old.
07:06Is he really?
07:06And there's a mixture of husky, greyhound and pointer in there.
07:10Oh, my word.
07:11Oh, my word.
07:13I've just seen it.
07:14He's lava.
07:15That is absolutely huge.
07:18So am I in the fort yet?
07:20You are in the inner embankment.
07:21Am I?
07:22You're on the inner embankment of the fort.
07:23Oh, my word.
07:24And you can take a seat in my grumpy Rupert's Windsor chair.
07:28Oh, can I?
07:29Yeah.
07:30Oh, my word.
07:33Just shoot me.
07:35Anyway, now that we can speak Matt Baker, let's have a look at him in his last ever appearance on
07:42The One Show.
07:43I'm excited.
07:45But we have commissioned The One Show's resident artist, who you love, I know you love him, Adebanji, to paint
07:52a lovely picture.
07:54Now, here it is.
07:56It's you and I on the sofa.
07:59Let me have a look.
08:00Oh, my word.
08:01Look at this!
08:04He really is so wholesome, isn't he?
08:07And that's the problem.
08:08I don't like the mirror he holds up to me.
08:12And what is The One Show doing with a resident artist?
08:15It's not a crown court.
08:19The last person I can remember who had a resident artist was Louis XIV.
08:24Anyway, let's move away from the comfort zone of Matt Baker to the seething cauldron of hatred
08:31that now exists on breakfast television between the hosts and the weather people.
08:37Chilly outside and it's going to get colder and there's going to be snow as well.
08:41Why are you here, Carol?
08:44Because some of that was right, Naga.
08:47You tell us, oh, with a beautiful picture.
08:49That is gorgeous, Carol.
08:51That's stunning.
08:51Is that a sign of things to come?
08:52Carol, if you just move out the way, it'd improve the picture of Helen.
08:56Well, you should too, Nana.
08:58Nana.
08:59Naga.
08:59Get it right, Carol, come on.
09:02What do you think about the Nana thing?
09:03I'm not talking to anyone.
09:05First, I thought this was just banter.
09:07But in this clip, the body language is pure...
09:11Piers and Alex.
09:13Of course, Carol could come.
09:14Carol's got the weather for us this morning.
09:16Morning, Carol.
09:17Thank you, Dan.
09:18Good morning, everybody.
09:19I'll just go, shall I?
09:22Then, after a gentle jibe from the Jolly Weather Woman, this happened.
09:27Do you know what?
09:27I would never forget Charlie's name.
09:29Naga.
09:31Charlie's never.
09:32Carol, you're on form this morning.
09:33Can I just say, with lovely weather.
09:35Very nice.
09:36Very nice.
09:36Come out of it.
09:37What's the point?
09:38What is the point?
09:40Um...
09:41Of course, walking off is all the rage at the moment.
09:44There's now even a lockdown version of it.
09:47You know what, actually?
09:48I'm not...
09:49I don't even want to do this interview because I don't even want to look
09:52at what it says at the bottom of that screen.
09:54So, I'm just going to switch off, do a real Piers Morgan.
09:59Huge apologies.
10:01We didn't...
10:02It wasn't our intention to upset you.
10:05Now, I absolutely sympathise with whoever that was because...
10:10Imagine being labelled a wellness guru.
10:15Mind you, when it comes to captions at the bottom of the screen,
10:18it could be worse.
10:19There was a woman called Margaret Bates, for example.
10:21She's a visiting professor of sustainable waste management
10:24at the University of Northampton.
10:27But this is what they called her on Panorama.
10:31A fly-tipping expert.
10:34Perhaps that's what she does at weekends,
10:36lobs old fridges over hedges.
10:38My favourite, though, is a chap called Adam Lincel,
10:41who is an athlete and a committed charity worker.
10:44And here's how he was billed by the BBC.
10:48Penis running.
10:50How long, I wonder, will it be before we see this?
10:54Hat expert.
10:56Oh, now, The Gadget Show.
10:58The only magazine programme on British television
11:01that's presented in what appears to be a foreign language.
11:06It's got a quad-core processor, one gig of RAM,
11:09seven-inch LCD screen, so it's not HD,
11:1216 gig of storage, which is expandable to 32.
11:15What operating system does it run?
11:17Android 8.1 Go edition.
11:20And because the spec, the tech spec, is so low,
11:23it runs paired-back versions of the Play Store apps.
11:26Now, the funny thing is, when you turn the subtitles on,
11:30it transpires, those are the actual words they're using.
11:34But I find myself drawn to this tech fest every week for two reasons.
11:38One, it's hosted in part by a chap called John Bentley,
11:42who gave me my first job in television.
11:44And two, because of the prizes they give away in their competition.
11:48Cuddly toy, barbecue set.
11:51No, we are way beyond that here.
11:55So, make yourselves comfortable, because this, for real,
11:59is what one person can win.
12:02Right, let's jump straight in with this little kit from Apple.
12:05A brand-new 13-inch MacBook Pro with M1 processor,
12:08a 12.9-inch iPad Pro with Apple Pencil and Magic Keyboard,
12:12an iMac 5K, an iPhone 12 Pro Max,
12:15with Apple Watch Series 6 and Apple TV Plus free for a year.
12:19And how about an iPad Air as well?
12:21Because, you know, we're nice like that.
12:22And that lot is just the tip of the tech iceberg.
12:25Fancy some top order of year two?
12:26A UE Hyperben Bluetooth speaker,
12:28a pair of Bose noise-cancelling earbuds
12:30and over-ear headphones,
12:32Spotify Premium for a year,
12:33plus three Amazon Echo Dots
12:35so you can listen all over your home,
12:37and a Sony Bluetooth turntable.
12:39Keep in touch on the go with a Samsung Galaxy S21 Ultra
12:42and OnePlus 8T.
12:43And stay in style on the go with a pure Air Pro electric scooter.
12:47Get your vlog on with a Sony ZV1 camera,
12:49GoPro Hero 9 and a DJI Mavic Air 2 drone.
12:53Then get your game on with a PS5 and an Xbox Series X,
12:56both with five games, a Nintendo Switch with Mario Kart Live,
12:59and for a bit of VR gaming, an Oculus Quest 2 headset.
13:03It's not just next-gen gaming we've got you covered for.
13:05How about this tech to trick up your pad?
13:07An Amazon Echo Show 10, ring video doorbell
13:10and five-piece ring alarm kit.
13:11Plus, a Nest Thermostatum Blink 5 camera home security bundle.
13:15That's some great smart home tech,
13:17but it gets even better with a Dyson supersonic air dryer
13:20and cordless hair strengthens and V8 vacuum,
13:23a Panasonic automated bread maker, Amazon Kindle Oasis e-reader
13:26and Oakleen AI-powered toothbrush.
13:29Plus an iRobot robotic back-and-mop.
13:31Hit the open road with a pair of techie bikes,
13:33a giant advanced road bike,
13:35an eRobot folding electric city bike,
13:37plus a smart bike helmet with integrated lights
13:39and a Fitbit Sense health track and a smart watch.
13:42Then kick back on the sofa
13:44and go for your brand new home cinema set-up,
13:46including a 75-inch LG 4K TV
13:48with a Sonos Dolby Atmos soundbar,
13:50subwoofer and a pair of rear wireless speakers,
13:53plus a 43-inch TV for the bedroom
13:55and an anchor portable projector.
13:56And if that lot somehow wasn't quite enough,
13:58we're keeping you future-proof
13:59with a 55-inch LG 8K TV 2.
14:03It's a gargantuan gadget hall worth over ÂŁ30,000
14:05and you'd be simply mad to miss it.
14:08It is. It is.
14:11You know that stuck ship in the Suez Canal?
14:15That's what it was carrying.
14:18Which means it isn't here yet.
14:20So, while you try to access the gadget show on My5
14:24to see if you can still win all that clobber,
14:26we're going to take a short break.
14:28See you in a minute.
14:40Welcome back.
14:42And apropos of nothing at all,
14:44one of the bands that competed to represent Sweden
14:47at this year's Eurovision Song Contest
14:49claim that they were singing in Swedish.
14:52But when it gets to the chorus,
14:54we're not sure they were.
14:56Oh
15:21Sadly they were beaten into the number two slot. Oh no
15:26Oh
15:27Actually while we're on the subject of mishearing the current series of the critically acclaimed line of duty
15:34Was for me spoiled somewhat by everyone talking non-stop
15:38About what sounded like jizz
15:42Meet with the Jesus handler for a start you could help us locate your chance
15:47Because the chis is baldy okay, but on the DL only if we've got cheese inside MIT
15:52I don't know if it's a commercial thing with the chis
15:56Fuck the cheese
15:58They were actually saying chis which means grass or snitch
16:04I've gone to the trouble of having it translated here and it stands for covert human intelligence source
16:12Basically then human sauce
16:16So as we were
16:19Now
16:20Grand designs a big favorite of mine and there was a particularly noteworthy episode recently
16:26In which a self-confessed eco warrior decided to build a state-of-the-art underground house that would be
16:34Insulated and heated by the soil itself now this caused the always excellent Kevin MacLeod to become
16:41A little bit bemused
16:45Essentially it's a earth sheltered house, but with a difference. It's a self heating house
16:49What we're doing is gathering the sunlight in
16:51Which is a big glazing?
16:54Transferring that heat with an underfloor transfer mechanism
16:57Into the earth banks
17:00Well hey
17:01These earth banks will store the heat from some time
17:05Now it turned out that the original design for this underground house wasn't going to be strong enough
17:11So they had to come up with an expensive and complicated solution involving cast concrete
17:15But eventually the important eco work could begin
17:20What we've got under here is earth
17:24Then we've got polythene
17:25And then finally the critical part of it which is the polystyrene
17:29At least the house has started to disappear
17:31Kind of
17:33The only telltale sign of course
17:36Is the ubiquitous the ever-present sign that there is somewhere buried under this a house and that is
17:42Yards and Yards of blue plastic
17:45Eventually of course the house was finished and here it is
17:49It's a symphony of wood and glass and polystyrene
17:55Shrouding an interior filled with space-age technology
17:59Italian ceramics
18:01And even a home cinema
18:03Then as is the way with grand designs
18:06Kevin went back to talk to the polystyrene enthusiast who built it
18:11And given that it's this chap's business to sell underground eco heating technology to hipsters
18:16I wondered if he was going to be honest about how far over budget he'd gone
18:22Can you remember how much you started out wanting to spend on this?
18:25With contingency 300k
18:27Which got blown almost straight away with having to go for the cast concrete approach
18:33Since that point we've just been very careful just making really good purchasing decisions
18:39So I think it's going to come in at about 310
18:42Right
18:43He built that house for 310,000 pounds
18:47That is amazing
18:48But of course the big question is
18:50Does the soil roof heating technology actually work?
18:55Well here are the couple both wearing jumpers
18:58And what about Kevin?
19:00Yup, he hasn't taken his coat off
19:02So let's be fair and say the jury's out
19:06Buying gloves
19:08Now, the reason why Kevin devoted a whole show to environmentalism
19:13Is that it's compulsory these days
19:15Every show has to talk about it
19:17I'm talking about it now
19:19Everyone is
19:20Across deserts, glaciers, even rainforests
19:24In a bid to raise awareness of climate change
19:28And by absorbing carbon
19:30They are our greatest ally in combating climate change
19:35Now I'd have thought we'd have seen more artworks on this theme of course
19:38Global warming
19:39The animals are now refugees
19:42Thanks to global warming
19:45I'm worried sir
19:47I'm worried about the weather and the seasons
19:51And all the plastic everywhere
19:54Well don't look at me
19:56Blame global warming
19:59It's weird
20:00There are lots of things that are important
20:03So why has television singled out climate change
20:06As the one thing we must all talk about all the time?
20:09It's like airlines have singled out smoking
20:12As the one thing you can't do on a plane
20:14There are big signs and announcements
20:16And you think
20:17Yeah but masturbating is not allowed either
20:19Or murdering
20:21We already know that climate change is the biggest threat to humanity
20:25After escalators obviously
20:27So why do we keep going on about it?
20:30Even when Doctor Who was being attacked by some giant space phlegm
20:34She and her mates still found time to deliver a short lecture on the subject
20:39Someone help
20:41Someone help
20:42Made in China
20:43Hey how did this get in here?
20:45We never left
20:47Orphan 55
20:47It's Earth
20:48Your future
20:49How did Earth end up like this?
20:51Good warnings from every scientist alive
20:53Global warming
20:54Huh?
20:55The food chain collapses
20:56Mass migration
20:57And war
20:58Oh shut up
21:01Even singing competitions are now in on the act
21:05Please change the story
21:08We are the lost
21:10We are the lost
21:13This beautiful Earth
21:16Cannot be lost
21:18Stop hurting our planets
21:22Like you don't care
21:28There's only one world
21:30For us to share
21:34There's only one world
21:35I was watching that thinking, God it's awful
21:39It really was
21:42But it did bring home to me just how much plastic there is in the judges faces
21:51The worst thing though are the lyrics
21:54I've got them here
21:55I went online and downloaded them
21:57Ready?
21:57All the grown-ups take note of this
22:00Wake up and see that you must make a change
22:04I'm sorry but
22:05Since when did kids start lecturing adults on how to behave?
22:09I mean take Thunberg yelling at Donald Trump
22:11If I shouted at the President of America
22:13My dad would have been furious with me
22:16And those kids just then
22:17They had the audacity
22:19Okay
22:19The audacity to sing
22:21Don't listen to the fat cat
22:24In front of Simon Cowell
22:26They were lucky not to get a clip round the ear
22:28And it does make me wonder
22:30If you reformed the St Winifred school choir today
22:34What would the lyrics be?
22:37Grandma we love you
22:39I seriously doubt that
22:41Grandma Grandma we hate you
22:46Burning all the fossil fuel
22:51Now the birds and bees are gone
22:55Cause you put your heating on
22:59Glass and glass and selfish grunt
23:04Not recycled plastic
23:07Whoa! Strong!
23:09Too strong!
23:10We're off the air strong!
23:13Stop singing and we're going to take a short break
23:16Back after this
23:30Right, in part two we covered green issues
23:33Which means we must move on to the other thing
23:36That must now be in every single show on television
23:39Um...lesbians
23:41LAUGHTER
23:42MUSIC PLAYS
23:49MUSIC PLAYS
24:02MUSIC CONTINUES
24:05MUSIC CONTINUES
24:05MUSIC CONTINUES
24:07MUSIC CONTINUES
24:18If you wish to continue I can just sit quietly and wait
24:20LAUGHTER
24:21Now obviously there are certain shows and movies
24:24Where you would struggle to insert a lesbian scene
24:28Apollo 13 for example
24:30LAUGHTER
24:31Countryfile
24:32And certainly when I sat down to watch the new remake of Das Boot
24:36Which is set on board a German U-boat in World War II
24:39I thought there's no way the writers will be able to
24:43Shoehorn any lesbionics into this
24:47Oh, how wrong I was
24:50MUSIC CONTINUES
24:52MUSIC CONTINUES
25:08It's like Anna Friel has unlocked Pandora's box
25:11And I'm sure you're thinking
25:14Where's the male equivalent?
25:15I mean take the world of formula one there are hundreds of guys involved so statistically quite a few of
25:22them are going to be gay
25:23But if you look at Netflix's new series drive to survive, which is very good, by the way, there's no
25:29evidence of it at all
25:40Oh
25:43Why does your hair always look so good
25:46Diet don't wash it mate looks darker. I know she'd actually I'm not just saying that
25:51Yeah, I haven't seen anything quite so overtly heterosexual since the volleyball game in Top Gun
26:06Have you noticed how University Challenge seems to attract contestants with stupid names?
26:13Warwick break
26:16King's tricks
26:18What's in the swing?
26:19Edinburgh Fricker
26:21Edinburgh Jeffcoat
26:24Lady Margaret Hall Lobo
26:26Lady Margaret Hall La Cuisette
26:28Open Lab
26:29Imperial Ramen
26:31Bristol Pie
26:33Bristol Salmon
26:36St John's Leaks
26:38Which country?
26:39St John's Sword
26:41Jesus Cashman
26:42Mandate is correct
26:44Oh
26:47Brilliant
26:48And that is my favourite there
26:50Jesus Cashman
26:52Now
26:52The thing is we all know students like a prank
26:55So how's this for a plan?
26:57You've got Randall and Lamb
26:58Yes, okay
26:59And you need two more contestants
27:01And you're going to be tempted to go for people who know about medieval history or physics
27:05Wrong
27:06Choose them for their names
27:09Choose them for their names
27:09Sit them in the correct order
27:10And hey presto
27:12You get this
27:14Whoa Black Betty Randall
27:17Brilliant
27:18I mean whoa
27:20Thick as pig shit
27:21But it doesn't matter because she gave you a laugh
27:23It's like when you play Scrabble
27:25Yes, she could get underpass on a two treble word scores
27:29And that would get you 179 points
27:31But that's not playing properly
27:33The right thing to do is to settle for four points because the word you put down is arse
27:40Anyway, I now think it's a good time to look at some morons making fools of themselves on other quiz
27:47shows
27:47The M25 is an orbital motorway that circles which English city?
27:53England
27:53It's London
27:54What unit of power is abbreviated to HP?
27:58Hats of Parliament
27:59Horsepower
28:00I need five capital cities outside of the UK that are further north than London
28:06The time starts now
28:08Manchester
28:09No, no, no, wait, outside of the UK
28:11Between 1991 and 1999, Peter Schmeichel was the goalkeeper for which English football club?
28:18There's
28:19Germany
28:21Which English football club?
28:23Did you do is a traditional music instrument from what country?
28:27Denmark
28:28Australia
28:30The French word for which flying insect?
28:33Dog
28:34Butterfly
28:35So let's just get this straight
28:37One of those contestants has gone through life thinking that a dog is a flying insect
28:43So she must know she's not that bright
28:46And yet she still woke up one morning and thought
28:49Yeah, I think I'll go on a quiz show
28:54Amazingly though, she is not the most stupid person I've ever seen on television
28:59And I think one day, like, my house will be like a museum for people
29:04When I die, Dolly Parton's got Dollywood
29:07You can pay to go and walk round Elvis' house
29:09I think that is going to happen in my lifetime
29:13Right
29:14Jenna Collins there thinking that her house will be a museum before she dies
29:17She clearly doesn't know what lifetime means
29:21And then there's Louise Redknapp who it seems is unsure about what's meant by the word autobiography
29:30I think people are describing it as an autobiography
29:32I think people are describing it as an autobiography
29:32But it's actually more, if I can explain it
29:35I've really just talked about certain stages in my life
29:38Right from, you know, when I was younger right till now
29:41Yeah
29:41Erm, and then the second part of the chapter is just kind of what I learnt along the way
29:48Yeah, Louise, that is an autobiography
29:52And just when you thought that was the best TV could do to make your brain collapse in on itself
29:59like an imploding star
30:00Along came a new show called Darling, What Have You Done To Your Hair?
30:06Would you risk your hair for ÂŁ500?
30:09You'd look like you've been electrocuted
30:10Two bravers
30:12One picks a crazy haircut
30:13I think she'd hate it
30:15The other answers questions for cash
30:18But one wrong answer could cost them big
30:21Will they win their dream haircut and keep the cash?
30:24You're right
30:25It's majestic
30:26Or lose it all and get the crazy cut
30:29This is Darling, What Have You Done To Your Hair?
30:34Now, the reason why inane drivel like that gets on television
30:38Is that TV producers believe they need to dumb down because the viewer can't handle complexity
30:45However, a few hours after 40,000 people watched that idiot give someone a haircut
30:5140 million people tuned in to watch this
30:56The rates are still very high at over 11,000 cases on a seven day average
31:02So over 55% protection just led to a 72% reduction in the number of people who developed for
31:12those
31:1286% are people who are in groups one to four
31:16These are people at 21 days after just one dose of the vaccine
31:20The great majority of whom have now been vaccinated make up 58% of those people
31:25But
31:25And this increased further to 86% if they had a second dose
31:30And we all understood every single word
31:34Honestly, this is why I love television
31:37It's got people who think dogs can fly
31:40And lesbians and Matt Baker saying, oh my word
31:43And documentaries about aircraft carriers and debates on Persian art and Chris Whitty
31:48And sometimes you find a nugget of pure genius like this
31:53From the BBC's Ola Gurin on the crisis in Yemen
31:57Frontline or not, classes continue here
32:00Down below it's mathematics
32:02Over here it's Arabic language
32:05Teachers tell us the war has already taught these children to be resilient
32:10They say the pupils rarely miss a day
32:13Now more than ever they're hungry for education
32:17Ola's reports from Yemen have been extraordinary
32:20The story she told about kids being shot by snipers was harrowing beyond belief
32:25It was epic journalism
32:27And it was delivered to you by exactly the same machine
32:32That also brought you this
32:34Lucas my vagina is on fire
32:36Now I feel like I'm getting an infection
32:39What a urinary infection
32:43It stinks doesn't it?
32:45It's like yeast
32:49Oh my word
32:50Goodnight
32:51Goodnight
32:52Goodnight
32:53Goodnight
32:53Goodnight
32:54Goodnight
32:54Goodnight
32:56Goodnight
32:57Goodnight
32:57Goodnight