- 23 hours ago
First broadcast 9th October 2003.
Stephen Fry
Alan Davies
Rich Hall
Gyles Brandreth
Rob Brydon
Stephen Fry
Alan Davies
Rich Hall
Gyles Brandreth
Rob Brydon
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:00Well, hello and welcome to QI, the world's most impossible quiz and the nearest modern
00:07equivalent to Lions vs. Christians. Let's meet my lunch. Alan Davis, Rob Brydon, Merit
00:15Hall and Giles Burnham. Now, the rules are simple. As I don't really expect anyone to
00:24get any of the answers right, I award points for being interesting. And penalties, usually
00:29if history is any guide, to Alan, for being obvious. In which event I also humiliate him
00:35like this.
00:39Now, and take away ten points. Each member of the team is able to draw attention to themselves
00:45by making a noise. Rich goes. Giles goes. Rob goes.
00:53And Alan goes.
00:59Minus ten to Alan already before we've even begun our first round. And our first round is
01:09all about advertising. The superior man, says Confucius, understands what is right. The inferior
01:16man understands what will sell. If so, it must be said that there are very few inferior men
01:21in advertising because almost no one in the industry has the faintest idea what will sell. For
01:27example, team, what was the disastrous mistake made by Gerber Foods when they started advertising
01:35baby food in Africa?
01:37You're never alone with a strand.
01:39Yes. That's a reference to a very famous disastrous campaign, isn't it? Would you like to elucidate
01:44for those who don't know?
01:45Strand cigarettes.
01:46Yeah. And this guy was alone at night smoking a cigarette and he looked a bit kind of cool
01:51and sophisticated in third man-ish and they thought that was an image people would aspire
01:55to and it said you're never alone with a strand. But it made it look like it was for a really
01:58lonely old bastard.
02:00Yeah.
02:01Hitler smoked.
02:02Hitler smoked? He hated smoking.
02:04Ah. So he didn't smoke?
02:05No, he didn't.
02:06And he was a vegetarian.
02:07And he was a vegetarian.
02:09Queen Victoria smoked.
02:10Did she?
02:11Oh, you've got to have two points for that.
02:13There is indeed a photograph of Queen Victoria smoking. She always smoked when she was up
02:17in the Highlands to keep the midges away during picnics.
02:20Oh, that's awfully good.
02:22There's a positive aspect of smoking.
02:23Yeah.
02:24Keeps midges away.
02:25Keeps the midges away.
02:26Yep, absolutely.
02:27And keeps Hitler away.
02:28But we seem...
02:29You can't really do better than a cigarette when you come down here, can you?
02:32Midges are more irritating, but in the long term, they'd rather keep the Nazis out of
02:37the Highlands.
02:38Absolutely.
02:39I think you may have a question, Rob.
02:45No, I just like the two.
02:47Yeah, I...
02:48My answer to the question, the original question about the advertising...
02:50Gerva Foods, yeah.
02:51Gerva Foods, why is it...
02:52Is it that they had a very poor, shoddy translator, and the advert gave the impression you were buying
03:00baby food?
03:01Oddly enough, the...
03:03Is that made from baby?
03:04Food made from baby.
03:05No.
03:06You're sort of halfway to being right.
03:08It's simply...
03:09I'll tell you the answer.
03:10It's quite intriguing and bizarre.
03:11It's that they use the same packaging as they use in the United States and in Europe,
03:15which has a cute photo, like the one behind me, of a tiny baby on the jar.
03:19Definitely.
03:20In Africa, most people are unable to read, and therefore, packaging always represents
03:25what's inside the jar.
03:27The pictures always represent what's inside, so they assumed that the jars were of babies.
03:32So I'm right.
03:33So you're right, but for the wrong reasons, for which you get three points, Rob.
03:36Can I make a little supplementary point here?
03:38I'd love you to do that.
03:39Because I happen to know quite a bit about the Gerber or Gerber family, for reasons I
03:45can go into.
03:46Is it Gerber or Gerber?
03:47It is Gerber.
03:48Gerber.
03:49The...
03:50What's interesting about the tins, the cans, is one of the reasons they didn't go down at
03:54all well in Africa is that a lot of people in Africa are black.
03:58And on the...
03:59Oh!
04:00I know.
04:01I know.
04:02I'm just breaking you in gently.
04:03That is quite interesting.
04:04And on...
04:05Good.
04:06Yeah.
04:07And if you picture these cans, we're selling baby food to people in Africa.
04:13First thing is that people think what's inside is going to be children, and secondly, those
04:17that think it is for children think, well, this does not look very like any of the children
04:22I know, because it is a perfectly charming white child from Texas.
04:27Right.
04:28And I can tell you, for a further point, who the white child was.
04:30Oh, please do.
04:31Gerber?
04:32No, she was not.
04:33She was called Ann Turner Cook.
04:35The photograph was taken in 1931, and up until the end of the Second World War was the most
04:41prolific romantic novelist working in the United States of America.
04:44I'm sorry.
04:45That's 10 points.
04:46That's 10 points.
04:47That's fantastic.
04:48My great-great-grandfather, who was a man called Dr. Benjamin Brandreth, was a friend
04:56of the original Dr. Gerber.
04:59They were pioneers of...
05:00They were pioneers of advertising in the United States of America.
05:03Right.
05:04And so, unfortunately, I do know a lot about this.
05:08The firm, originally, was not in food at all.
05:12They were in the business of tanning.
05:15And so, unfortunately, tanning just fell from favor.
05:20No way.
05:22Come on.
05:23I'm sorry.
05:24I'm sorry.
05:25Apparently, during the recent war in the Gulf, the Iraqi Republican Guard were told that,
05:42in order to become a U.S. Marine, you had to eat a baby.
05:46Wow.
05:47Yeah.
05:48That's shocking.
05:49I may institute a new rule, Alan, just that anybody who starts off any piece of information
05:53with the words, apparently, comma, may well lose 10 points.
05:58Well, I only say apparently, because I heard it on Fox News.
06:01Yeah, that's why that's not good enough for us.
06:03I wasn't at the Iraqi Republican Guard briefing.
06:06Have you grown up as a childhood friend of the family that founded the United States Army,
06:11like Giles grew up with the Gerber family?
06:14My great-grandfather was in the original Republican Guard.
06:19Can I just say something about the Ferris wheel?
06:24Yes.
06:25There's an interesting fact.
06:26I know a few things.
06:27Yeah.
06:28The Ferris wheel was originally designed as a mode of transportation.
06:32And it's made in Voyage from St. Louis to Kansas City at the World Exhibition in 1898.
06:45It went off track and crushed a lot of people.
06:47And that's when the guy Ferris, John Compton Ferris, decided that it would be better if it didn't move.
06:54And the lesson there is if you have an idea that goes nowhere, maybe it's not supposed to.
07:01That's very true and very wise.
07:03Do you want to pinch the loaf of your story?
07:05I'll come back to that during the course of the next couple of hours.
07:09But if I could just throw in something about the Ferris wheel, that is in fact a picture of the London Eye.
07:14Yes, it is.
07:15And what is intriguing about the London Eye is that the principal architect is a man who shares the same birthday as Gustav Eiffel who created the Eiffel Tower.
07:25Oh, I say, I'm tempted to give you two points for that.
07:27It's true.
07:28Because it's true.
07:29It's true and it's quite interesting.
07:32This one is known as the Millennium Isle.
07:35Yes.
07:36It was sponsored by British Airways, wasn't it?
07:37Yes.
07:38It was open on Millennium Eve.
07:39And you find this on the South Bank in London, on the banks of the Thames, which is the river that flows through London.
07:46You can go up as far as Oxford, you can go all right out the other way to sea.
07:51And it's down near the old DLC and from it you can see Parliament.
07:57I'm going to call an official end to question one.
08:05Now, what is it, what is it that the French find hilarious about advertisements for the Toyota MR2?
08:12Anybody have an idea about that?
08:15Yes, Carl.
08:17Do we get a penalty if we give you the obvious answer? We do, don't we?
08:20I don't know what the obvious answer might mean.
08:21The obvious answer is that MR2, if you say it in French, is MR2, which means that the car is shit.
08:29Yes, quite right. It's the obvious answer. And it's the true answer in this case.
08:32APPLAUSE
08:33Isn't it interesting that the Eiffel Tower has now appeared? You know, Gustav Eiffel happens to share at the birthday?
08:45It's also remarkable how you can cheer a child up once you get all the spaghetti out of its hair.
08:54Absolutely.
08:55Yeah, it does. It's MR2, which sounds exactly like the French word MR2.
09:02If you don't want to look at total Pratt in your car abroad, it's also not a good idea to drive a Ford Pinto in Brazil, where Pinto is a slang for tiny male genitals.
09:11I was going to guess that. Oh, there you are. It's a brilliant slang for a tiny penis.
09:16Pinto. Pinto in the shower. Yeah, yeah.
09:20What was the unforgettable slogan that the Irish playwright Brendan Behan devised to advertise Guinness?
09:25It's good for you. Oh, dear. Oh, dear. Oh, dear. Oh, obvious.
09:34And wrong. I'm sorry about that. Minus ten to an apple.
09:39No, he didn't devise that. There's a story of Brendan Behan in Canada. Do you know this? He was on Canadian television.
09:45And a drunk, as he always was. And they said, so what brings you to Canada, Mr. Behan?
09:52And he said, well, now, I was in a bar in Dublin, and they had one of those coasters.
09:59And it said, only drink Canada dry, so I thought I'd give it a shot.
10:04It's not amazing. Did he die in New York?
10:08No, Dublin. He died at the age of 41. I know that. He was of severe cirrhosis of the liver.
10:13Really? Only 41? Yes. Alcoholic from the age of eight.
10:17I'm not joking. From the age of eight. His brother is still alive.
10:23No, Dominic. Dominic has died. I met him.
10:27Did he do the same trick when you met him as when I met him?
10:30We were walking along a corridor with this lovely William Morris wallpaper,
10:34and I learnt something about actually how to handle somebody if they're not being very interesting.
10:38Oh, do tell me. You tell me.
10:39Because I was trying to tell him about William Morris, and I made the mistake of saying, this is lovely William Morris wallpaper,
10:51at which point he undid his trousers, and urinated from that end to that end of the William Morrison wallpaper.
10:56Oh, the charm of the Irish drunk. It's lovely, isn't it?
11:01No, Brendan Behan was asked by Guinness, as Ireland's most famous living playwright, as he was, really,
11:07to come up with a slogan for Guinness. And he said, you'll have to send a couple of crates round.
11:12And they sent round two crates of bottled Guinness, and they went round the next day,
11:16and all the bottles had been drunk, and there were screwed up bits of paper everywhere.
11:19And he said, I've got it. And he handed him a piece of paper, and it said, Guinness makes you drunk.
11:25There you are. Sort of the ultimate, the perfect advertising slogan in many ways.
11:31You know, Venus is made entirely out of felt.
11:35I would like three points, please.
11:39Do you know who predicted James Dean's death in his car?
11:45Ah, yes. Nostradamus.
11:46Yes. Yes.
11:47Nostradamus.
11:48Yes.
11:49No, it was...
11:51Alec Guinness.
11:52Alec Guinness.
11:53Alec Guinness.
11:54Alec Guinness was going to go into a restaurant, and James Dean came running out and said,
11:59hey, you can come and sit with me. And Alec Guinness said, that's very kind of you.
12:03And he said, but would you come? That was Alec Guinness.
12:06He said, but come and... He said, you know, come along, first of all, and take a look at my new car.
12:10James Dean.
12:11James Dean.
12:13No, Stuart Little was there.
12:16Mom, Dad, I'm going in.
12:22And he went and had a look at the car, and Alec Guinness felt a strange thing, and he said, if you go inside that car, you will not be alive.
12:31And sure enough, he said, two weeks later, I turned on the television and James Dean had been killed in that very car. That's a true story.
12:49Radish is a meat.
12:51Anyway, the slogan Guinness is good for you was in fact written by Queen of Crime Dorothy L Sayers, who was, of course, not Irish, but English.
13:05We'll be right back after these messages.
13:08Now, this round is set in ancient Athens. The Greeks invented tragedy, comedy, geometry, philosophy, biology, democracy, history, prize-giving, persuasion, proof, punctuation, politics, boxing gloves, tightrope walking, and the steam engine.
13:27According to these geniuses, how do otters kill crocodiles?
13:38Softly with their songs.
13:43That's a very beautiful answer indeed.
13:45It had a sort of lyrical quality to it.
13:47It really did.
13:49I think it must be more than one otter at work.
13:51Yes.
13:52Be an otter distraction, lure the otter, dry land, pull the plug out.
13:58Oh, choke them. Get in. You hold his jaws open, I'll choke him.
14:02Well, it's not far off.
14:03It's closer, isn't it? Is it something to do with them waiting till they're asleep and actually climbing into them, just walking straight into them?
14:09Well, do you know you're not far off there, young Giles.
14:11It's, I'll tell you what it is.
14:13They actually believed that otters scampered into the open mouths of crocodiles, and at their entrails, and then dashed out again when the crocodile had died.
14:23The crocodile went, ah!
14:26The Greeks had a lot of very good ideas, but this wasn't one of them, because it's not true.
14:30Another of them ideas, very popular in its day, but which hasn't lasted, was rafa nidzein.
14:36It's the penalty for adultery, and it involved inserting a radish into the adulterer's bottom.
14:43Radishes were a lot longer, wider, and pointier in those days, and were hammered home with a mallet.
14:48Rafa nidzein is therefore a verb meaning to insert a radish into the fundament.
14:53You know, a radish is a meat.
14:56I don't know why I've mentioned that enough.
14:57To insert meat into the fundament, there is another word for that.
15:01The special word for that.
15:04It's an absurd punishment.
15:05You'd have thought, I'd have thought, smacking them on the thumb with a mallet would be much more.
15:10Wouldn't it?
15:11They were, after all, Greek, you see.
15:13They didn't really mind homosexuality, though, did they?
15:17They very much relished it.
15:19They certainly knew a thing or two about man-on-man action.
15:24What was the job of Aristocles?
15:30Aristocles, better known to his friends as Wide Boy.
15:34He also means flat, oddly enough, means wide and flat.
15:36Flat.
15:37Flat.
15:38Flat.
15:39What's a flat-billed sort of animal called?
15:41A duck-billed platypus.
15:43Plato.
15:45Plato is the answer.
15:46Plato is the answer?
15:48Yes, his real name was Aristocles, and he was known as the White One.
15:51Plato's real name was Aristocles?
15:53Aristocles, he was nicknamed Plato.
15:55There he is.
15:56Oh, my word, he went to a terrible sculptor.
16:01It must be so upsetting when you do that when they put the mirror behind you.
16:07Pull it out like that.
16:09May I ask who sculpted you last, sir?
16:12Oh, dear.
16:14Yeah, I will.
16:16Plato was indeed the schoolboy nickname of Aristocles from the Greek Wide,
16:20and it was given to him because of his broad shoulders.
16:22His real name was Aristocles, and Aristocles taught Aristotle.
16:26And what did Aristotle teach us, the world, about buzzards?
16:30Oh, this would be something absurd.
16:32He did say something absurd about it.
16:33It would be ridiculous.
16:34He did say something like they could read their minds or something like that.
16:37No, he, I'll tell you what it is, actually.
16:39He felt that there were birds who didn't realise they were buzzards,
16:44and it was building up inside that they were latent buzzards.
16:47Latent?
16:48Well, hey.
16:49You get five for something there. I don't quite know what it is, Ron, but you get five for something.
16:56I'll tell you the answer, actually, he thought they had three testicles.
16:59Oh, you see, this is the sort of thing he comes out with all the time.
17:02He's very overrated. Even though he knew a good sculptor, he looks all right there.
17:07Look at the robe on him.
17:10There's a really interesting thing I can tell you about buzzards, on the other hand.
17:13The Latin for buzzard, its, you know, taxonomical name is buteo-buteo, right?
17:20Now, there's a sort of, as it were, a subspecies of buzzard called a hobby, and it is sub-buteo.
17:27Oh, God.
17:28Sub-buteo.
17:30And the man who invented a game wanted to call it the hobby.
17:35And when he tried to patent it, they wouldn't let him use the word the hobby,
17:39so he called it after the Latin name for the hobby, which is sub-buteo.
17:43And that's why one is kicking a little testicle around the board.
17:45Yes, if you like, how it all comes back.
17:47That's where the name sub-buteo comes from.
17:49It must be great to be a philosopher.
17:51None of us could sit there and count the testicles on a buzzard
17:55and really explain it or justify it.
17:58I don't know when I'm counting the balls on a buzzard.
18:01Some better things than, well, I'm a philosopher.
18:03Oh, well, go ahead.
18:05Did you know that the Pope, when the Pope is elected, still has to have this ceremony in the Vatican?
18:11After the Pope is elected, the Pope is carried over a group of the Cardinals.
18:16And now, of course, the Pope actually doesn't display himself, but in days gone by, he would display himself.
18:22And the Cardinals, this still happens to this day, when the Pope is crowned, the Cardinals,
18:26the Pope is carried on a chair over the Cardinals, and they look up, and they say,
18:32testiculus habet et bene pendentes.
18:36And this is, yes, it is absolutely true.
18:38He has balls that is well hung?
18:40No.
18:42Bene pendentes.
18:43They are hanging well.
18:44They are hanging well.
18:45And it goes back to the time of Pope Joe, when a girl masqueraded as a young Pope.
18:52And since that's when the ceremony was introduced, and so the tradition continues to this day.
18:57Fabulous, five points, brilliant, I love it.
18:58Well done.
19:00Well done.
19:02Now, what did the ancient Greeks use blackberries for?
19:06Tarts, pies, and occasionally a nice salad.
19:10Is it to do with health or beauty?
19:13It is to do with health, not really beauty, I think we'll be pushing it, but health.
19:16They used to push them up their backside.
19:17Yes, indeed.
19:18Comforting from the radish, when the radish came in, the blackberries would push in the blow.
19:23It's sort of almost true, because they used it as a specific against piles.
19:27And I dare say, having a few radishes ham it up, you would probably induce piles.
19:33Now, one in ten ancient Athenians did it regularly until the Macedonians put a stop to it in 322 BC.
19:40What am I talking about?
19:43They're not doing it there, incidentally, in that picture behind.
19:45That's not a clue.
19:46They pay their utilities bills by direct debit.
19:49Would you recommend the direct debit route?
19:54It takes the hassle out of it, Stephen.
19:56It takes the hassle out of it.
19:58You can't put a price on peace of mind.
20:02So, what do Greeks...
20:04Is it something specifically Greek?
20:05What did they do?
20:07Something we do.
20:08Something we do.
20:09We do it.
20:10Something we do.
20:11Oh, elections.
20:12They voted.
20:13They voted for all their chieftains, all their leaders, all their wise men.
20:16They voted for their justice at the Areopagitica.
20:19And a democracy was born.
20:21It was snatched crudely away from them by the Macedonians.
20:24Invented, though, in ancient Greece.
20:26Speaking of crudely...
20:27Lasted only 180 years.
20:28Pinto.
20:34The Greeks regarded small testicles as rather artistic.
20:36I'm a man out of his time.
20:38Yeah.
20:40You get five points for being British.
20:43Only 10% of the population ever had the vote.
20:47Greek women had to wait another 2,274 years until they finally got theirs in 1952.
20:53I don't know why all this talk of politics and radishes does it, but it's put me in mind, for some reason, of Michael Portillo.
21:00When Michael Portillo was a young and unknown Tory hopeful, he was noted for his amazingly energetic canvassing.
21:06On one whistle-stop tour, apparently, he arrived at the front door of a house, having literally run up the garden path, and he rang the doorbell.
21:14But something was amiss.
21:16And he looked behind him to see that the path he'd just run up was covered in newly laid wet concrete, covered in Portillo footprints.
21:22At that moment, the door opened, and a burly constituent said,
21:26Yes.
21:27Good morning, sir, said Portillo with his cheesiest grin.
21:30I'm your Labour Party candidate.
21:31And he ran off back down the path.
21:32So, now, to our final traditional round. Fingers on the buzzers, please, gentlemen, for this pyrotechnic display of general ignorance.
21:50How many legs does a centipede have?
21:55Uh, none.
21:56Oh, sadly not.
22:00Centipede, because they don't really have legs, they have little, uh, limbs.
22:04They're called legs.
22:05They have little claws.
22:06They have little claws.
22:07Not claws, no.
22:08No, they're called legs.
22:09Is it actually not a hundred?
22:10It's not a hundred.
22:11Not a hundred, no.
22:13No, you clever swive.
22:15Did you see what I've done there?
22:16You clever swive.
22:18You were pointed at forfeit.
22:21Not claws.
22:22It's not claws, neither.
22:23No, I didn't.
22:25It varies, but it is always an equal and even number.
22:29Ah.
22:30That's interesting.
22:32What Giles says is interesting.
22:33Let me, let me, let me do this for a while and then tell you the answer, which is this.
22:38Centipedes have been extensively studied for over a hundred years, but not one has ever been found that has a hundred legs.
22:45Some have more, some less.
22:46The one with the number of legs closest to a hundred was discovered in 1999, that recently.
22:50It has 96 legs and is unique among centipedes in that it is the only known species with an even number of pairs of legs, 48 pairs.
23:00All other centipedes have odd-numbered pairs of legs ranging from 15 to 191 pairs.
23:05So there.
23:07So you're saying there's no Santa Claus?
23:09Yeah.
23:10To my face.
23:11My dear fellow.
23:12What a long way for that one.
23:13You certainly did.
23:14Oh my God.
23:15You're rewarded with a handsome one point.
23:16Now, what did 35,000 Americans ensure themselves against in 1994?
23:31Yes.
23:32They do it every year.
23:33Yeah.
23:34Being abducted by aliens.
23:37Did you say being abducted by aliens?
23:39Did you?
23:40I did.
23:41You're absolutely right.
23:42Well done.
23:44Hello.
23:46Yeah.
23:47What more can I add?
23:49Being kidnapped and eaten by aliens, believe it or not, 2,760,000 Californians, 8% of the state's population, claimed to have been abducted by aliens.
24:00To be perfectly honest, quite a high proportion of these insurance policies are actually bought by other people for friends as a joke birthday present.
24:08Now, most of these people are pulled over by the police for drink driving.
24:11And they use that as an excuse.
24:12And they always, I've lost all control.
24:14I was in this force field.
24:15I had no control over me.
24:17Blue lights descended on me and I was yanked from a car and thrown into a room and probed.
24:25With a radish.
24:26With a radish.
24:27Yeah.
24:28Now, next question.
24:29What rhymes with purple?
24:31Ah.
24:32It's like orange.
24:33Nothing does.
24:34Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.
24:36Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.
24:39Oh, dear.
24:40Oh, dear.
24:41No, no, there are two words in the English language that rhyme with purple.
24:44Two.
24:45Burple.
24:46I can't say everyday words.
24:47But there are two words.
24:48I'm afraid you have to lose ten points there.
24:49That's okay.
24:50I'll tell you the answer.
24:51Lurple.
24:52Tent.
24:53You won't get there if you go through all the sounds known to man.
24:56You won't get there.
24:57Maple, sirple.
24:58Maple, sirple.
24:59It doesn't count.
25:00Sirple.
25:01Durple.
25:02Yeah.
25:03Furple.
25:04Gurple.
25:05Hurple.
25:06Durple.
25:07Kerple.
25:08Erple.
25:09Merple.
25:10Do you know what you're doing on national television?
25:12Mrs. Davis's little boy has grown up to go nerple.
25:16Merple.
25:17Merple.
25:18Serple.
25:19They're not common words.
25:20They're not common words.
25:21If you had a swimming pool and you covered it in fur, it'd be a fur pool.
25:26Fur pool.
25:27It would.
25:28It would.
25:29It would.
25:30I'll tell you the answer.
25:31It's fur pool is one word.
25:32I think I said fur pool.
25:33You did.
25:34Oh, hey.
25:35Five points, Daniel.
25:37Five points.
25:38Five points taken away if you also mentioned any other sound.
25:43To happen is to hobble along with one leg dragging behind the other halfway between a walk and a crawl.
25:49The other word, of course, you could have had was kerple.
25:53I think you're fine.
25:54I said that.
25:59Didn't I say I'd take ten points away if there was a second one that you'd already said?
26:03Yes.
26:04Yes.
26:05But I'm going to take that back.
26:06I'm not going to.
26:07Kerple is the leather strap passing under a horse's tail.
26:10Tail.
26:11Buckled.
26:12Is buckled to the saddle.
26:17To stop it slipping forwards.
26:20It's better known as a cropper.
26:22It's also kerple.
26:24It's the rump or hindquarters of a horse.
26:26Horse.
26:27Now known as an I'm an idiot.
26:34Yeah.
26:35Or now known as the croup.
26:39The word appears in a rhyme in the work of Scotland's national poet, and I shall give it to you.
26:44It's time, I think, for the final scores.
26:58Oh, my wordly Worthington, here we go.
27:01In last place, I'm afraid, is Alan with 15 points.
27:05I'm sorry about that.
27:06Because you played an absolute blinder.
27:08In third place with 17, it's Rob.
27:10But look at this.
27:11In second place with a massive 35 points, it's Rich.
27:14But in the lead with 54, it's Giles Brandreth, ladies and gentlemen.
27:24Well, that's about it for QI this week.
27:26It only remains for me to thank our splendid panel of Alan, Rob, Rich and Giles,
27:30and to end on this quite interesting snippet of information on adultery
27:34taken from our court report in the Daily Express.
27:37Mrs. Hancocks of Middlecote, Coventry, said she became Mellor's mistress in 1967.
27:42He was a gentle lover and they, quote, had a very good relationship, unquote.
27:47When asked by the prosecution, can you remember how long it continued,
27:50she replied, about half an hour.
27:53That's a good one.
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