- 5 weeks ago
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00:00No one said it was gonna be easy
00:15Nobody said it had to be fair
00:21All of the chances taken together
00:30And all the changes we had to share
00:33Well, you think we've made it all worthwhile
00:40Then you realize no one cares
00:46But we're gonna get it right this time
00:54Cause we've passed the point of no return
00:59And we're never gonna go down that road again
01:07And we're never gonna go down that road again
01:15I'd give it five if I were you
01:39What? I'd rather use the bushes than risk getting in there, mate
01:41Right, blow it off your side, boys, the poor sod that's gonna clean it out
01:53It's nearly so right for some, though, isn't it, Ned?
01:57Only some of us are staying in the village
01:59Well, listen, fellas, that tongue could well cause great aggression and disarmament amongst us
02:05Look, buddy, man, we've worked in much worse conditions than this before
02:09We're not gonna fall out over to Port-A-Loo
02:12I like to go last thing at night, I do
02:14Port-A-Loo, Sanchez
02:17No, no, no, is this serious?
02:20The pheronomes, you say?
02:22No, it wasn't. It was the kinks
02:23Who the heck are the pheronomes?
02:25Look, not a lot of people know about pheronomes, you know
02:28I only found out when I read this article in the magazine, in the syrophages
02:32Why?
02:33Foot-knew it, was it?
02:35No, no
02:36Look, if you don't want to hear, look, it's no sweat off my arse
02:40Just go back to your normal moronic topics of conversation
02:43Sex relegation is the best point I ever had
02:46No, no, no, buddy, I'll wear
02:49Dazzle, my poor father
02:51Oi
02:52Oi
02:53Oi
02:54Oi
02:55Oi
02:57Oi
02:58Pheronomes
02:59Pheronomes
03:00May well be a contributing factor to football hooliganism
03:03You see, they're invisible entities
03:06Which fly off into the atmosphere whenever you take a pay
03:10And they stimulate aggressive tendencies
03:13Now, at halftime
03:16When everyone pays at once
03:18Massive numbers of pheronomes are set free
03:21Right
03:22And apparently
03:23Apparently
03:24This is why
03:2567% of violence takes place in a second half
03:28Oh
03:35Come up with something new every day, lad
03:36No
03:37No, no, I haven't gone along with that
03:38I was at Villa Park one year and somebody pissed in me pocket
03:42I was furious
03:43I'm furious
03:44I'm furious
03:45Half-limits, boy
04:00Half-limits, boy
04:13Oh, I'm not so sure, Bon
04:15I mean, at Ali's party, you know, back in Geordieland
04:17Definitely got a flash off that one
04:19Yeah, well, if you mess around with her and bollock it up for the rest of us
04:21You'll have more than that flash off me, Wayne
04:23Eh, don't sermonize me, Bon
04:25You're not past a bit of literary yourself
04:26I saw you the other night down in a casino
04:28Two young travelages from Princeton, eh?
04:31Nothing I did with them is gonna come back on us, lad
04:34Off-limits
04:38Morning, lads
04:39Oh
04:40How do?
04:43Right, I'll not be long
04:44You mind this place is coming on
04:47You'll be finished here soon
04:49I haven't done hang about us, lad, you know
04:52Eh, what you gonna do when the job's finished, guys?
04:56Me?
04:58I don't know
04:59I suppose I'll have to go back and face the grim reality of Morgan Thatcher's Britain
05:05Unless your Ali coughs up the finishing bonus, eh?
05:08Then I can postpone it
05:10For a week
05:11Yeah
05:12Then, er, take off somewhere, like?
05:15Ah, well
05:17Me and Barry had planned to have a slow Toby back through France
05:20But
05:22Now with his, you know, fiancia
05:24What to give La Francia the big A, so to speak
05:28So I'll be on me hunt as usual
05:30Well, I'm very sorry if my personal affairs have intruded on your plans, Oz
05:35Not my plans, Pop
05:37You were the one who went to go and see the shite houses of the Loire
05:40Chateaus, Oz
05:42I have always fancied Saint-Tropez meself
05:45I think there's more nightlife
05:47And I mean way, it's more sophisticated than this, isn't it?
05:50Oh, aye, yeah, definitely
05:52Give me Saint-Tropez every time
05:55Right, Vic, you are ready?
05:57Right, er, we'll go and make all, cos I've got the top down
06:01Oh, that record's nice
06:03Very cool
06:04Yes, sir
06:05I'll take you to this boutique after
06:07Oh, well, take two motors then
06:08Right, lads
06:09I'll see you later
06:11Stick in
06:15Where they off to then, eh?
06:16Yeah, they've gone to pick up some tiles
06:27Excuse me, lads
06:28I'll be a minute
06:29I'll see you at one thing at my home, Marjorie
06:30You never wanted to be that close to me walk
06:46Yeah, buddy, why didn't you get hazel up here on the job, will you?
06:49Then you could sort of reach your private life and cut cable at the same time
06:52You've got my private life to remain private, pretty much
06:56We await developments with bated breath
07:06Shooky?
07:08I've quietened her down, poor pet
07:10Oh, look, if her temperature's not down tomorrow, we've got to get the doctor in
07:13I don't know, Neville
07:14I hate the thought of foreign doctors
07:17I mean, at least if we were at home, we could take her round the corner and see Dr Amrit garage
07:23I think it's just a combination of them mosquito bites and too much sun at the beach yesterday
07:27Yeah, you're probably right
07:29Listen, I've got to get back to the lads
07:30Are you just stopping here the day?
07:32Well, I've got to, haven't I?
07:34Well, I'll keep an eye on her if you want to go down the port
07:36No, never pet, it wouldn't look right
07:38You've got your job to do
07:41Hey, look, it's ironical, isn't it?
07:43Here's us, we've got a luxury villa
07:45I'm outside laying bricks
07:47You're stuck indoors watching Spanish TV
07:53Which one do you think, Chris?
07:56Well, it is your villa after all, Vicky
07:59Oh, I know, but I mean, you've got a flair for this sort of thing
08:02I mean, that's why I wanted you to cook
08:04This is it? He says that one's twice as expensive as that one
08:12There's plenty more to choose from, you know
08:14No, no, it remains me, it looks between these two
08:19Well, if it was up to me, I would go for this one, the more traditional design
08:23But that is the expensive one
08:25Oh, I'm not bothered about that, I mean, it's Ali's money
08:27That's the one, then, is it?
08:29Aye, I'm adamant, I'll have that one
08:31Right, I'll do the business
08:32OK
08:36I wonder if I should tie in the barbecue area
08:42What do you think?
08:44Oh, I don't know, Vicky
08:46I really don't know
08:48But I'm sure the villa is going to be absolutely exquisite once it's finished
08:53Hmm...
08:56You don't sound very enthusiastic
08:58I would be all right if it was just for the odd week
09:01What do you mean?
09:03Hey, Chris, I've got nobody to confide in
09:05That's why I'm pleased you're here
09:07I mean, Ali never tells me anything
09:09Breathing out and putting two and two together
09:11He's been really touchy recently
09:13And there's been all these late-night phone calls
09:16And now his solicitors turned up
09:18And I bet Hallward's not down here for a time
09:20What are you saying, Vicky?
09:22Well, if it does come to that
09:25There are worse places to live
09:28Oh, no, it's got everything
09:30I mean, the climate
09:32And the Mediterranean
09:34And forget all English television flown over on video
09:36Chris, I'd die if I thought I was never going to stay in Newcastle again
09:39Hey, lads, knock it on the head!
09:41Yeah
09:42Right, who's for the casino tonight then, eh?
09:43Yeah, Watson, lots of female tourists down the casino
09:45Yeah, are they, man?
09:46You know, it looks got a cheese sometime
09:47You coming, Barry?
09:48Hey, lads, knuckle on the head.
09:58Right, who's for the casino tonight, then, eh?
10:01Bomber's on. Lots of female tourists down the casino.
10:04Yeah, right, man. It looks got to change some time.
10:07You coming, Barry? Or is it doing that hors d'oeuvre with you and Abel?
10:10Yes, it is, as a matter of fact.
10:11Yeah, once you book a table at the place on the porch, you know,
10:14you want to see all the guides.
10:15You know, where all the rich people off the yachts go.
10:17Well, if that doesn't do it, now it will.
10:21Oz? Oz? Yeah?
10:24Oz? Look, I'm sorry if you ever said it out of the French street, mate.
10:28Oh, that's all right. Forget it.
10:31Actually, I'm thinking we'd gone to Ibiza.
10:34Yeah?
10:35Ah, well, I've got a couple of mates doing there,
10:37and they reckon it's paradise.
10:39They're either pissed out your brains or stoned out your skull
10:41for 24 hours a day, apparently.
10:43And the toddy, they reckon there's that much float in the boat on the beach
10:47that you've gone out your mind with choice.
10:49So that sounds like just the sort of place for a little bit of recubederation up there, this lot.
10:53Yeah.
10:55Well, obviously, Hazel coming out of us,
10:57but I don't know how many of the complexion on our relationship was.
11:01Wonderful.
11:02I didn't ask her, I didn't beg or nothing.
11:06She came to me.
11:07I don't know how many of the people were going to do it.
11:08Right?
11:09What, pure and fair?
11:11Yeah.
11:13It's bad to tell you something, that is, you know.
11:16Tells me she's got more doer than brains.
11:18Oh, don't put the mockers on it, Oz, I mean.
11:21You know how much she means to me, like.
11:24I mean, if it wasn't for Hazel Redfern,
11:26none of us would have got back together, why?
11:28I mean, we wouldn't be here.
11:30Yeah.
11:32Ah, true.
11:33True.
11:35Yeah.
11:36Cheers.
11:41Seems aeons ago, doesn't it, eh?
11:44We all reunited to renovate my love nest.
11:48Oh, right, right.
11:51We did the same job with that plumbing, didn't we?
11:52Yeah.
11:53I tell you, your labour will not be in vain, mate.
11:56Oh, I just feel so much more optimistic about me whole future now.
12:05I mean, I still see we should have put a bigger boiler in me.
12:19Hi, Brenda.
12:20Hi.
12:21How's Debbie?
12:22I'm all right, it's rain now.
12:24Is she?
12:24Oh, good.
12:25She's playing with Neville.
12:26Dennis is in the shower.
12:28If you like, I'll have to have for you tomorrow.
12:30You could have a day out with Hazel.
12:32I've just seen her in the porch.
12:33She's at a bit of a loose end.
12:34I couldn't ask you, pet.
12:36No, really, I'd enjoy it.
12:38She's a lovely little girl.
12:39I'm sure she'd be all right with me.
12:41In any case, give me a break from Vicky.
12:44I thought you two got on.
12:45Oh, we do.
12:47It's just a bit depressing going around all these expensive boutiques,
12:50helping her choose the latest in Italian swimwear.
12:53Oh, God, you wouldn't believe the prices.
12:55Oh, she wants her nothing.
12:58Maybe.
13:01She's terribly generous, though.
13:02I'll say that for her.
13:03Look, she's bought us one of these each.
13:06Oh, hey.
13:07I like that.
13:12Something smells good in there.
13:14I hope so.
13:15I'll try my hand at Zarsweiler.
13:18Wow, look at this lot.
13:20These must be Ali's best, are they?
13:22Yes, well, I just thought we'd show the lads
13:24that we can live as elegantly as anyone round here.
13:27See if you can find some candles, Christine.
13:29No more bets.
13:32No más puestas.
13:36In a minute, Baray.
13:37Watch out, Nick.
13:4027 red.
13:41Rojo.
13:44Do you know that restaurant I was telling you about,
13:45that's what I hoped the wonderful sidekick I could have got to get into?
13:48Yeah, well, we can't get into it.
13:50But he gave the table away,
13:51so they couldn't guarantee another one till next August.
13:53They're just as happy with a sandwich.
13:55Could you give me another ticcais on earth, please?
13:57What's got into your eyes?
14:02Oh, I love this, Baray.
14:04The atmosphere.
14:06The click of the chips.
14:07The green pies.
14:09No more bets.
14:10It's so romantic.
14:13You see that man over there with a beard and the blue tie?
14:16If he loses again, who knows?
14:17He might go out in the balcony and play Brian's out.
14:23How much have you lost?
14:25Four black.
14:26Quattro negro.
14:29I'm about 150.
14:32Up.
14:32Oh, it's beside us.
14:34Pounds.
14:35Pounds?
14:36Blorey.
14:37We must buy for your airfare, then.
14:47Hey, Bond.
14:48How's it going?
14:48Oh, hold my own.
14:49Guess what?
14:51What?
14:51Wayne.
14:52Chattanoop Vicky.
14:53What?
14:54Down by the bar.
14:56I was trying to get a drink just now.
14:57My cop's some of the day.
14:58How long he was giving it?
14:59Like what?
15:00Like, I suppose with Ali being such a working oleck,
15:03a girl like you gets neglected in certain errands.
15:05Oh, that subtle, was it?
15:07Yeah.
15:09It's not in our interest to have Wayne pestering Ali's lady.
15:12Oh, I think Bond would better deal with it.
15:14Take my hand over and be steady.
15:16And talk to him, you know.
15:17Oh, then I won't try.
15:18Look at the dirty dog, huh?
15:40Yeah.
15:43Oh, he never gives it a restaurant, does he?
15:46He's like one of them little wire-haired terriers.
15:48You know, it keeps humping away at your leg.
15:50Well, I'll cure him.
15:55Hold on, hold on.
15:56What am I supposed to do then, eh?
15:58Bollocks on the way.
15:59She'll have more than that.
16:00And ranchers, up-westers.
16:06Quattro, negro.
16:12Oh.
16:14I don't know what's coming out, but...
16:16Who?
16:17I've never seen her like this before.
16:20She's getting pretty carried away.
16:23She's on holiday, Barry.
16:25I've been on holiday with the four-box, eh?
16:27This isn't unwinding.
16:29This is a reckless abandon.
16:30She's just put the down payment on a three-piece suite on Red Eleven.
16:34Well, you're not married yet, are you?
16:36It's her money, you know.
16:37Not your settee.
16:39Hold the card, please.
16:40I want to sit down.
16:43All right.
16:43Thank you very much.
16:49Sam, we go, please.
16:51Right.
16:51Are you lads trying to save us from yourself, is that it?
16:55Eh?
16:55Oh, we ain't.
16:56Ah, no, we're just now what he's like, man.
16:58Now he can get a bit carried away at times.
17:00Oh, he's not so bad.
17:02He's just always a bit down in the dumps, that's all.
17:04You know, he's often a bit of friendship and conversation.
17:06It's just his way of trying to get me pants off.
17:08That was Ali.
17:14Hmm, I gathered that.
17:16He wants me to go back to the UK.
17:18What?
17:19And walk off the job?
17:20No, no, just for a couple of days.
17:22He wants me to fly back to Hallwood, bring back some documents for signature.
17:26I'm sorry, are you going to be all right?
17:27Yeah, of course I will be.
17:29It was too important for the post, he said.
17:31Look, I don't like gossiping, but Vicky told me something today that I think you should know.
17:36It's just a T-shirt you got off, Vicky.
17:37Yes, what do you think?
17:39You should take it off.
17:40Dennis, this is important.
17:42What?
17:43Ali Fraser.
17:44I think he might be in some sort of trouble.
17:50Over here, Brenda.
17:53Hello, Hazel.
17:55Want a coffee?
17:57Yeah, I wouldn't mind.
17:59Two more, please, Carlo.
18:00Wait for me, please.
18:01Uno con leco, por favor.
18:03Si, senor.
18:05Oh, this'll be me third.
18:07I need John, please, to get going this morning.
18:09I wasn't in bed till five.
18:11Five?
18:11How and how's Barry going to get through work?
18:13Ah, he bad at it, ten to twelve.
18:16He's got this thing about being in bed before midnight.
18:18Always has had.
18:19I think he's afraid he's going to turn into a pumpkin.
18:22Where were you?
18:23At the casino.
18:24I was busting.
18:25I was like a woman possessed.
18:27Gambling.
18:28Roulette.
18:28I was on a winning streak.
18:30I had to go with the flow, didn't I?
18:31Oh, I felt terrible when I woke up this morning.
18:33Oh, I bet you did.
18:35Then I saw the £500 in my handbag and I felt ever so much better.
18:39Five hundred?
18:40Yeah.
18:41So lunch is on me.
18:42Oh, hello, Dennis.
19:03I just wanted up from Economy.
19:05See how the other half lives.
19:06Thanks.
19:06I'm surprised Ollie didn't get you a club ticket, Dennis.
19:18Yeah?
19:19I'm nut.
19:23Ollie says your lads are doing a great job on the villa.
19:26Top rank, my team.
19:27No question.
19:28Sure.
19:29What's all the panic about, then?
19:31Panic?
19:32Nobody's panicking, Dennis.
19:33Flies me all the way back to Newcastle.
19:35Leaves a lads unsupervised.
19:37Oh, it's, uh, what, papers, you know, Dennis urging signatures, you know.
19:40But could they not wait till he got back?
19:43Well, he doesn't want to break into his holiday, does he?
19:45I mean, he's entitled to it after all, you know.
19:48How are you enjoying Spain, Dennis?
19:51It's an education, eh?
20:00Oh, my God, Joyce.
20:02Ah!
20:05No, no, no, no, no, no, you don't have to file, because it's automatic.
20:32Oh, what was this thing, do you press?
20:35Uh, it's a grey button.
20:37Oh, Brenda, make sure you get lots of it after you.
20:45I'll take one of you now.
20:46Yeah.
20:48Hi.
20:49Perhaps you'd like to take a photograph of you both, eh?
20:52I'm sorry if I was leaning on your boat.
20:54Oh, of course not, please, eh, come aboard, come aboard, eh?
20:58We'll take the photograph here.
21:00Ah!
21:02Come on, Brenda.
21:04I am Stefano.
21:05Hazel Redfern.
21:07Ah, ah, this is my friend, Brenda Halp.
21:10Come, star.
21:11Very well, thank you.
21:13Permitting?
21:13Hey, you want I take you against the rail, eh?
21:16Anytime you like it.
21:17Hazel.
21:18Ah, uh, you don't have to focus, it's automatic.
21:21Ah, good, good.
21:22I know this camera, yes?
21:25Now, well, smile.
21:27Good.
21:29Good.
21:31Eccola.
21:34I didn't know that we had yesterday.
21:36Ah, meet my good friends, um, Brenda, and, uh, Hazel.
21:41Hazel.
21:42Hazel.
21:43Enchanté.
21:45Gunther.
21:46Aldo.
21:49Perhaps, uh, you'll like us some champagne, eh?
21:51Yes, thank you.
21:52Oh, dear, eh?
21:54Perhaps you'll like something else, eh?
21:56I think it's just a little early in the day for me.
21:58Early?
21:59Oh, excuse me.
22:02Ah, yes, you see, in Hong Kong, they're already having dinner.
22:04Oh, Brenda, we're in now my rush.
22:08Well, yes, it'll be nice.
22:09Good.
22:10You see, first we put out to sea, then we meet some friends,
22:13then we have lunch, eh?
22:15We catch, eh, the Bacchi di mare, eh?
22:18Oh, excuse me.
22:19Sea bus.
22:21Aldo, very good cook.
22:22Superb.
22:23Tastes delicious.
22:26You join us, girls?
22:27Ah, we'd love to.
22:28He's not a coach.
22:29Why?
22:30Once you're off the garden, it'll be out of the boat.
22:32Walk around the street like a typical English tourist.
22:34We'll ask him what time we'll be back.
22:37Excuse me, am I right in thinking?
22:40Are you English?
22:41Si.
22:42Si.
22:42Ah, you speak Italian.
22:44Good, I promise you.
22:46We will have you back in time for tea, eh?
22:48Tea for two, eh?
22:50Tea for four.
22:54People brandy's.
22:56You must be bloody nervous, son.
22:58I sense the solids are about to hit the air conditioning, Kenny.
23:04Broad squad?
23:05Revenue?
23:07Imaginous customs and excise?
23:09Ah, you could be trying to brace me.
23:12Maybe it'd be better as you go over and just tough it out.
23:15But?
23:16Just a few too many imponderables, Kenny.
23:20It's probably best if I just stick around here for a wee while to see which way the wind goes.
23:25Yeah, well, if you want to buy some time down here, son,
23:28we're going to have to get some reddies.
23:29And if the law are already on to you,
23:33they'll have your bank manager in tow.
23:35And you won't be able to transfer any cash down here.
23:38I've been round the block, son.
23:40Yeah.
23:41The sort of person you want to deal with round here
23:43won't take your Barclay card.
23:46I'm having cash flowing in.
23:48Will I carry a pigeon?
23:54Even I've got bleeding tired flying across those Pyrenees.
23:57Dennis is bringing it.
23:58Are you a gapper?
24:01You must trust him.
24:03He doesn't know.
24:17I envy Dan me.
24:20This moment he'd be sitting in an English pub
24:22murdering an English pint.
24:25You're a strange bloke you are, Nav.
24:28Ever since I've known you,
24:29you've always wanted to be someplace else.
24:32These people down here paid a bloody fortune
24:34to enjoy this hot Spanish sunshine.
24:37Yeah, well, he'd rather be drinking warm ale
24:38in some manky pub in Gateshead.
24:41Yeah, but if he was there,
24:42then he'd wish he was here.
24:43I reckon that bomber's on Ellie's payroll.
24:50Acting like my naffing chaperone.
24:51I was on with that Vicky last night.
24:53I'm sure I was.
24:56Look,
24:57obviously, the lass has problems, right?
24:59Obviously, she's vulnerable at this point in time.
25:02Even to your transparent, all that you has.
25:05But it's not going to do us much good, is it?
25:06And it's not going to do the last much good
25:09if you leap on our bones.
25:11Oh, I see.
25:12So you've joined the moral majority, have you?
25:16What is it with you, eh?
25:19I mean, your nuts aren't going to go rusty down here, are they?
25:21I mean, you've got Spanish boilers,
25:23French tarts, German tarts, Swedish tarts,
25:26Danish tarts, British tarts.
25:28I mean, from Malaga to Gibraltar,
25:29it's wall to wall.
25:30Totty.
25:31So why, Vicky?
25:33Eh?
25:34Is it the danger?
25:36You just thought of getting your knees shut
25:37and give you a great big bonk on or something?
25:42Oh.
25:45Right, lads.
25:46Shouldn't we be getting back to work?
25:47It's all nice new deputy gaffer or what?
25:50No.
25:52It's just that we'll start a bit early.
25:53We'll finish a bit early.
25:54Get a few jaws in.
25:56Aye, right.
26:00Oh, by the way,
26:07the drinks are on age tonight.
26:10She's asked me, like, to ask you
26:12to join us for cocktails at the Hollywood bar in the pool.
26:15Aye, well done, Barry, you cracked her.
26:18What a strike, kid.
26:19What were you talking about?
26:21Barry and Hazel invite us for cocktails.
26:24If any of you no cause or just impediment,
26:28ye are to declare it.
26:29Get off, Boxay.
26:30Don't be coy, son.
26:32An announcement is obviously imminent.
26:34Yeah, good lad, Barry.
26:35Have you got a date yet?
26:36Look, look, look, I'm not getting engaged right.
26:39Sister Hazel won some money at the casino last night
26:41and she wants us to celebrate.
26:43How much?
26:44Oh, £500, thereabouts.
26:48What?
26:48Loan me.
26:50She's an heir or something.
26:52Why'd shut the gate on that one if I were you?
26:53You English girls, I love so much to touch her.
26:58Your skin.
26:59Get off, man.
27:00Come into my engine room.
27:02I show you my pee, stun.
27:04Ha, ha, ha.
27:05Ah.
27:07I said to him, I said, I said,
27:08Stefan, now, we might be three miles out,
27:11but that doesn't give you territorial rights.
27:13You'll call it, man.
27:14Get dressed.
27:15The lads will be back any minute now.
27:16No.
27:18Mind you, that gunter was very attractive, wasn't he?
27:21Said he was an actor.
27:22Hmm, well, he must be a German actor,
27:24cos I've never seen him.
27:25Well, you wouldn't get anyone that tasty
27:27on Emmett Alpharm, would you?
27:28Mm.
27:29Er, can I borrow your eyeliner?
27:31Yeah.
27:33Yeah.
27:36Ah.
27:38Listen, I don't think I ought to tell Neville
27:40about what went on today, all right?
27:42If you like.
27:43I know exactly what Barry would say
27:44if I told him I'd been drinking champagne
27:46on millionaire playboy yachts.
27:48What?
27:50You live in a fantasy world, you do, Hayes.
27:52Ha, ha, ha.
27:54Everywhere there's a red cross
27:55is where he's got a sign, okay, Dennis?
27:57Right.
27:58There you are.
28:00This other stuff here,
28:01this is just for information.
28:03Okay.
28:04Yeah.
28:04So.
28:09Right, I've got to ship myself.
28:10I've got to get to the airport.
28:11Yeah.
28:11Yeah.
28:13Oh, Dennis, I nearly forgot.
28:16Will you take that back for Ali, will you?
28:18What is it?
28:20Oh, it's just some clothes he needs,
28:21you know, now he's staying down there a bit longer.
28:24Right, look, yeah.
28:27Ta-ro, Ali.
28:28Cheerio, Dennis.
28:28Yes.
28:42All right.
28:44Cheers, Pets.
28:45Thank you very much.
28:46Well, I don't think you'll ever be that lucky again,
28:48so make them out of it.
28:49Ah, we were quite lucky today, weren't we, Brenda?
28:52All right, what did you do, Lee?
28:53No, nothing.
28:54We just, uh, just enjoyed ourselves.
28:56We're not going gambling again tonight,
28:58just have a nice meal, quite one, okay?
29:00Would you actually like to join us?
29:01Oh, no, we ought to get back.
29:02Christine's had the ban all day.
29:04Well, if I was you here,
29:06I'd get myself back down to the casino at night.
29:08Raise your look.
29:09That, look, that don't encourage you anymore, I suppose.
29:12Well, it's all relative, isn't it?
29:13I mean, 500 niggas soon's like a lot of do-er,
29:16but stick it all on one number and it comes up.
29:19Tartin' about a tidy sum there, son.
29:21How much will it be?
29:21Er, I don't think I think I'll use 17 and a half grand,
29:27and then there's just 18 grand with your stake.
29:30I don't even think about it.
29:31Yeah, but even that's relative, though, isn't it?
29:34I mean, 18 grand down here,
29:36probably buy you about half a bloody mast.
29:39Well, hey, fair enough.
29:40Leave it on, let it ride.
29:43I mean, if it comes up,
29:44you're talking about...
29:45you're talking about four, nine, three quarters of a million.
29:49Oh, now, hold on, that is significant.
29:51That could change your whole life, that could, eh, sir?
29:53But would you be happy?
29:54Definitely.
29:56I've got nothing against money per se.
29:59Now, I just think I'd like my money to be earned by honest graph.
30:02Me too.
30:03Two hours, toil on a Tuesday on the pools,
30:05and you've got eight score drawers comes up.
30:07How did all these people get all this money?
30:10Poor, not by honest graph, but I can guarantee you that.
30:13Half of them bastards out there,
30:15they'd be embezzlers, arms dealers,
30:17or bloody drug smugglers.
30:18You don't know that, Oz.
30:21Ah, nah, nah, I bet me bollocks on it.
30:25Now, look at them two there,
30:27Ponson do Nickies, right?
30:29They've just got up a boat
30:29about the same size across Channel Ferry.
30:31Didn't think they got that
30:32because it thought he has a clagging vein
30:34looping on cars, do you?
30:38Brenda.
30:39Hey, sir.
30:40How is that?
30:41Mm-hmm.
30:42I left your sunglasses this afternoon.
30:45Um...
30:47Neville,
30:48Bomber,
30:49Wayne,
30:50Moxie,
30:51Oz,
30:53Barry.
30:54I don't believe you know
30:56Gunter and Prince Stefano.
30:58Ciao.
31:12Morning, have you got your tickets?
31:17Yes.
31:19Hello.
31:19Mr. Patterson?
31:20Yep.
31:21I wonder if you'd like to come this way, please.
31:23Who are you?
31:25Customs.
31:26Customs?
31:27Mummy, we help, man.
31:29This way, please, sir.
31:29Is that everybody off the flight from Newcastle?
31:55Okay.
31:55Oh, hey, you really did get burnt on that boat, didn't you?
32:21Oh, I know.
32:21You don't notice it at sea with a breeze.
32:23Ah, nah.
32:24I was the same that week I spent on Khashoggi's yacht, man.
32:28You know, I didn't want to go, Neville.
32:30It was Hazel's idea.
32:31It'd have been mad not to, Pat.
32:33Well, anyway,
32:34at least we've got an excuse to go back.
32:35That's why I left me sunglasses there.
32:37So I'll take you next time, shall I?
32:38Oh, I can see them putting out the welcome mat for me, aye.
32:41Unless they want the deck swaddly.
32:43I'm not sure I'd want you there.
32:44It was full of beautiful women, Swedish times.
32:47Oh, aye.
32:50Do you reckon he's really a prince?
32:51No, he says he is.
32:52There was this coat of arms in the wheelhouse.
32:55The coat of arms above the bar in the fat ox.
32:57Doesn't mean Al Tonks is in line for the throne.
32:59There you go, pet.
33:00Aye.
33:02Anyway, there's all sorts of counts and princes in Italy.
33:05Are there?
33:06Why, yes.
33:07It's too penny out there.
33:08It's not like having an English title, you know.
33:10Hey, well, listen, I hope Hazel's photo's come out.
33:12Because otherwise your ma'am will never believe it.
33:15Oh, yeah, mind.
33:16She's a funny girl, that Hazel.
33:17Talk about hidden depths.
33:19I'll tell you one thing.
33:20Barry's got his hands full.
33:21How do you finish now?
33:32Ah!
33:33Oh, as a matter of fact, no, I'd like another funder door and a cappuccino, por favor.
33:39Senor.
33:40It's way past your bedtime, Barry.
33:43Look, there's still a lot of things to be resolved, Hazel.
33:47I've told you nothing happened.
33:48Prince Stefano was a perfect gentleman.
33:51Much as I'd expect from my royal blood.
33:53Who told me he asked you to go to Sardinia for the fortnight?
33:56But there'd have been a lot of us going.
33:58There'd be the crowd of us.
34:00Look, Hazel, if that's the sort of life you want, right?
34:04Well, you'd better go after it.
34:07I'd say, I'd tell you, sailing around the Mediterranean,
34:13sipping champagne and scuba diving is not real.
34:17You'd just be a real plaything to him.
34:20He'd dump you in Corsica with no ticket back.
34:25I'm real.
34:28I'm real and awkward feelings.
34:31I'll tell you, they're very, very bruised.
34:34You've made a laughingstock of me in front of me mates.
34:39I've watched me suffering while you pillixed around,
34:42making your mind up what you want out of life.
34:44I'm sick of your evasiveness and I'm sick of your procrastinating.
34:49Will that be all, senor?
34:50No!
34:54I'd like another puffer, boy.
34:56Have you ever been like this before, Barry?
35:03Probably because I've never been so pillixed around before.
35:05You're so assertive and decisive.
35:07And that's what I need in a man,
35:09because I'm one of nature's vacillators.
35:12Right.
35:14Right, if it's decisive as you want.
35:17We're going to get married, Hazel Redfern,
35:19and I don't mean a prolonged engagement
35:20with announcements in the Express and Star.
35:22I'm in here!
35:23Next Monday week!
35:24All right!
35:26Sorry.
35:26I accept.
35:27We'll get married, Al, for it'll be ever so romantic.
35:29It doesn't have to be, yeah.
35:31It's perfect.
35:32Well, what about your folks and my mother with her hip
35:35and cousin Nora and Auntie...
35:37and Auntie Mabel and the twins and...
35:39Sobbed a lot of them.
35:41Oh, look, I don't want a conventional wedding like all our friends.
35:44I don't want an accordion player
35:46and prawn volleyvons in the Bridge Street assembly rooms.
35:49Well, shouldn't we review this in the morning?
35:50Oh, no, don't back down, Barry. Not now.
35:55I'm not.
35:57No, I'm not. I'm not.
35:58I'm not. Just as long as you're serious.
36:00Absolutely.
36:03First thing in the morning,
36:04I'll tell Prince Stefano that Sardinia's out of the question.
36:33Hello, Vicky.
36:40Oh, er, hello, Mumma.
36:44Have you ever been in this one before?
36:46No, it's, er, it's a bit more select.
36:49Did I get you a drink?
36:51Er, no, thanks, I've got one.
36:55I, er, see you're not alone.
36:57Er, no.
37:00Wouldn't be anyone I know, would it?
37:01Er, it is, actually, yeah.
37:07Well, look, er, I know it's none of my business,
37:09and, er, well, I'm not one for bad-mouthing my mates,
37:11but, er, well, where the ladies are concerned,
37:14that means nothing but bad news.
37:16Well, er, I'll bet that means...
37:25Evening.
37:27Not even at last.
37:28I thought you said nobody knew what it was.
37:31I didn't think they did.
37:34Well, this is really a turn-up for you.
37:37Yes, well, let's, er, let's keep the lid on it, shall we?
37:41My lips are sealed.
37:42Have you, er, got any warnings to give us about him?
37:46Ours?
37:47He's a prince among men.
37:48Thanks, come on.
38:00You tell Baz to go up to Dennis' mother's house.
38:02You check out his friends, his neighbours.
38:04Can I take the car, Amy?
38:05Well, just take whatever you like.
38:06Just get lost, will you?
38:07Allie.
38:21Allie.
38:24Allie, Dennis is a family man.
38:27He has kids here.
38:29He's not going to do a runner with your money.
38:32Don't panic.
38:33Don't tell me not to panic, pal.
38:35If Dennis is picked up at an airport, then it is my nuts that are in the ringer.
38:38Good morning.
38:39Where in Jesus' name have you been?
38:41I got the first flight out this morning.
38:44Oh, you did, did you?
38:45Oh, you had a night out in the town.
38:47I'm down there at the airport for two hours, but you're out doing the strip clubs at Soho.
38:50No, no, no.
38:51I was detained by two gentlemen of the customs.
38:55You were?
38:58Did they give you a good going over, Dennis?
39:00Oh, aye, aye.
39:01They certainly did, yeah.
39:01What did they say?
39:04Well, uh, eventually they said,
39:08We're very sorry that you've been inconvenienced, Mr. Patterson.
39:17Oh, yes.
39:18Very sorry.
39:34Well, don't fart me around, Dennis.
39:53Don't fart you around.
39:55You set me up to bring a bag of undeclared illegal currency out of the country.
39:59You put my chopper on the block, pal.
40:01Did they find it?
40:02Well, if they had, I wouldn't be here, would I?
40:05Well, I see.
40:07See, so you opened this case before you left home.
40:09It's a good job I did, isn't it?
40:11You must think I'm a right wanker.
40:14Look, I knew I wasn't sent back to Newcastle to bring you back some documents.
40:19Something heavy's coming down on you, pal.
40:22It couldn't happen to a nicer fella.
40:23It's like Vicky's been shooting her mouth off to you.
40:25Just leave Vicky out this, you've brought this on yourself, man.
40:28Where is my money, Dennis?
40:29Oh, it's safe.
40:31Less of fuel could I've taken out to bump myself up to club class.
40:35Oh.
40:37Oh, Dennis, Dennis.
40:40Yeah, it's the reason I didn't level with you
40:42is because I reckon that what the eye doesn't see, the heart doesn't grieve over you.
40:46I didn't want you going through customs with the old ticker pounding
40:48and the old blood pressure shooting up through the roof.
40:50Oh, it's nice to know that you had my best-interested heart.
40:53Oh, Dennis, the reason I sent you
40:54is a reflection of my trust.
40:57We've worked together for a long time, you and me, eh?
41:01Scotch, do you?
41:02Look, I'm about to jack all this in, right?
41:03Not 25 grand.
41:05That's like my warranty.
41:08Are you laying down terms, Dennis?
41:09I am, actually, yeah.
41:11First off, you hold the deeds to my wife's house.
41:14I'd be obliged if Hallward sent them back me bank, right?
41:18Secondly,
41:19as you're about to become, uh, in exile out here,
41:22I'm a bit concerned about the lads.
41:24I mean, your assets might get tied up for a bit.
41:27So that money
41:28is guaranteed a full whack.
41:30Generous bonuses
41:31and the airfare's back home.
41:34Anything else?
41:36No.
41:39Oh, yeah.
41:40Yeah.
41:40If I see Vicky
41:43with so much as a broken finger, Neil,
41:47you'll never see the balance.
41:48Hello, Neil.
41:59How are you, Dan?
41:59All right.
42:00How are you?
42:00All right.
42:03How'd it go?
42:04Great.
42:05Hey,
42:05a bottle of scotch in there for you
42:06and a bottle of vodka
42:07for when you're through.
42:08Hey, hold it home, look.
42:10Magic, Neil.
42:10If I tell you what,
42:11working out here,
42:12you forget what a Tyneside sunset looks like.
42:14So, what have you been?
42:25You been all right?
42:25Yes, I've been fine.
42:27Good.
42:28Look, er,
42:29I got you that
42:30for tipping us a wink about, Ali.
42:31Oh, thanks.
42:33It's good to see you.
42:35Good to see you too.
42:36So, that was right, then.
42:44Ali Fraser is in some sort of trouble.
42:46Oh, he's in trouble, all right.
42:48You know what I think?
42:49Set the ball rolling.
42:51That house we did up for him in Derbyshire.
42:52Mm-hmm.
42:53You know, when we were working there,
42:55we used to say it was haunted.
42:57I'll tell you one thing.
42:58It's going to come back and haunt Ali.
43:00You got too greedy.
43:02Cut too many corners.
43:04Now, it's all going to come down on it.
43:06Well, where does that leave us?
43:08And all the rest of the lads?
43:09Oh, it's all right.
43:12Took out insurance.
43:13What do you mean?
43:15I'll tell you after.
43:16I've got to go to work, man.
43:17Oh, yes.
43:19Not yet, you haven't.
43:20Hmm.
43:31I've never heard of that before.
43:33What?
43:33Dennis, singing in the shop.
43:37Oh, I mind.
43:37He's been ever so cheerful.
43:39I've noticed that.
43:39It's very worrying.
43:41Why, for a hundred sec?
43:43Well, I'm just not used to it, that's all.
43:47I think it's Chris.
43:49Oh, aye.
43:51Women always think it's women that cheer men up.
43:54There's more to it than that.
43:55Oh, what's your theory, then?
43:57Oh, I never know.
43:58Maybe it's because he's going home.
44:00He's maybe got some more work lined up.
44:02Well, say what you like.
44:03I think they're very well suited, and she's a very nice girl.
44:05I never said she wasn't.
44:07Well, you certainly got out of bed the wrong side this morning, didn't you?
44:10Oh, I'm sorry, Pat.
44:12It's just...
44:12I suppose it's the situation, living this close proximity to another cuppa.
44:17Well, we haven't had to pay for a hotel, have we?
44:18Yeah, I know.
44:19Oh, but it's a bit restricting in other areas, isn't it?
44:23Honestly, you're so old-fashioned in some ways, never.
44:27I mean, I know they're in the next room,
44:28but you don't have to run both bathtubs every time we make love.
44:31Oh, can you believe there's no hot water again?
44:35Phew!
44:37I know it must go against the grain,
44:40but you've got to give your gaffer top marks for initiative.
44:43If I ever get back to the UK, I will damage him for life.
44:46He's pretty safe, then, by the sound of things.
44:50Hey, don't worry about the 25 grand.
44:52Think about it as a blessing in disguise.
44:55Well, I find it hard to be that philosophical.
44:57No, be fair.
44:58It lets you know that they're on your case.
45:00It's only a matter of time before they seize your books,
45:02freeze your assets, and issue the warrants.
45:04And believe me,
45:05I speak as someone with some experience in these matters.
45:08So what do I do now?
45:10Buy yourself some time, son.
45:13Spain may not be the haven that you thought it was.
45:15You may be better off in Costa Rica or the Mongolian People's Republic.
45:18Don't come the comedian with me, Kenny.
45:20No, bear with me, son.
45:22The Brits will already be in touch with their Spanish amigos, believe me.
45:27And I've got some money in Switzerland.
45:29Better.
45:30Better.
45:30The foresight, planning, the ability to think ahead.
45:33That's what separates you and me from the common herd, Ali.
45:36And I'd have to go there myself.
45:38Right.
45:38You get yourself down there.
45:40Then go down to Tangier's.
45:42I know this bloke there with the boat.
45:44Don't worry.
45:45He's not a tan hand in a night shirt with a flowerpot on his head.
45:48He's from Felixstown.
45:49Dead solid.
45:50How much?
45:5120%.
45:5220%?
45:53Well, that's only because you're my mate.
45:55And that's all in.
45:56And for that, you get Bobby and his boat in Tangier,
45:59all the overheads and the crew of the Sansorcy.
46:03Oh.
46:04We'll worry about the numbers later.
46:06How do we get the ball rolling?
46:07Well, I need a little bit in advance, you know.
46:09Well, I've got some cash in the safe up in the villa.
46:11All right.
46:11Let's, uh, go and count it, shall we?
46:20Hang on a minute.
46:21Wait a minute.
46:21Wait a minute.
46:22Wait a minute.
46:22I'm on Bobby's boat.
46:23Yeah.
46:24I've got my money in the suitcase.
46:25Mm-hmm.
46:26How do you propose to get me back on Spanish soil undetected?
46:30We'll let her think about that one, won't we?
46:32We'll let her think about that one, won't we?
46:41All right, lads, it won't harm you to down tools early for once.
47:04Come on down, open that.
47:05Jumpy.
47:06Barry's got an announcement to make.
47:11All right.
47:17Hooray!
47:19Up there!
47:20Ta-da!
47:22One momento, please.
47:24Come on.
47:25Shh, shh, shh, shh.
47:27Um, well, I am now able to put an end to all the speculation
47:32concerning this Hazel Redfern and myself.
47:35Last night, I am happy to say,
47:38this fair maiden has agreed to be my wife.
47:42Hooray!
47:44Wait a minute, wait a minute, there's more, there's more.
47:46She's in the club.
47:48Well, the nuptials will take place next Wednesday.
47:52And needless to say, you are all cordially invited.
47:55Hooray!
47:56What the heck is going on?
48:04Vicky!
48:05Ali!
48:06Barry and Hazel are getting married.
48:08Down here, next week.
48:10Can Mr. Haynes and Mr. Fraser a drink of champagne?
48:12Well, you'll be wanting a day off then, I suppose.
48:15Come on now, Ali, that's not too much to ask, no, is it?
48:17Come on, Ali, where's your generosity of spirit?
48:20I've got other things on my mind, Kenny.
48:21Well, there you are, Mr. Fraser.
48:23Ah, this is Mr. Mark Johnson's Hazel Redfern, this is Mr. Fraser.
48:27Pleased to meet you in the pool.
48:28Thank you very much.
48:29All the best to you, then, son.
48:30All the best.
48:31Okay, Ali.
48:32Yeah, excuse us.
48:40Ali, look.
48:41What a happy couple want to get married.
48:44They can use my yacht.
48:46What?
48:48And then we can have a wedding just outside the five-mile limit.
48:51Well, it's so much better.
48:53It's awesome.
48:54Borey and Hazel.
48:55Borey and Hazel.
48:56Borey and Hazel.
48:56Borey and Hazel.
48:58Good look.
49:03Yes, I started a while ago.
49:14Just strangers thrown together.
49:18Help us heroes, caught in a dream.
49:20Boy, we made such a crazy team
49:24Out of luck, down on the limb
49:28We saw each other through
49:30We laughed it off
49:33And then we shared a few
49:35Back with the boys again
49:39Back with the boys again
49:47Different reasons left us leaving
49:56Splitting up and going on solo
50:00Chasing circles and getting nowhere
50:03Longing for the way we were
50:07One for all, a dog for anyone
50:10Long as they're playing the game
50:13Sharing chances of taking all the blame
50:18Back with the boys again
50:22Yeah, we're back
50:25Back with the boys again
50:29Back with the boys again
50:34Back with the boys again
50:36Back with the boys again
50:37Back with the boys again
50:38Back with the boys again
50:39Back with the boys again
50:40Back with the boys again
50:41Back with the boys again
50:42Back with the boys again
50:43Back with the boys again
50:44Back with the boys again
50:45Back with the boys again
50:46Back with the boys again
50:47Back with the boys again
50:48Back with the boys again
50:49Back with the boys again
50:50Back with the boys again
50:51Back with the boys again
50:52Back with the boys again
50:53Back with the boys again
50:54Back with the boys again
50:55Back with the boys again
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