The Death of Bunny Munro Season 1 Episode 2

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The Death of Bunny Munro Season 1 Episode 2   #RealityTVDeep

Transcript

00:00Please be aware that this program also contains themes of suicide.

00:04I'll see you next time.

00:34Look at me.

00:39It feels different.

00:43Yeah.

00:43Yeah, like...

00:44Yeah.

00:45Like it's bigger than us now.

00:47And it's close, like...

00:53It feels divine.

00:57I love it.

01:00I love having a baby.

01:03I love having a baby.

01:06I fucking love you, Bunny.

01:16Yeah.

01:21Dad.

01:23What are we gonna do now?

01:32Come on, Junior.

01:36We're gonna get out there and shake that money tree.

01:38That's what we're gonna do.

01:44Come on, Junior.

01:47Oh, last thing.

01:48And don't stop me if you've heard this one before.

01:50All right, Bun.

01:51All right, Ray.

01:52What's green and smells of bacon?

01:53How's the egg?

01:55Kermit's finger.

01:59Are you okay?

02:00I'll see you later.

02:01See you later.

02:07How you doing, my friend?

02:09Tip fucking top.

02:11Always.

02:12So, er...

02:13So what you doing here?

02:14What do you think?

02:16I'm ready to go, so I need the list.

02:18Listen, Bun.

02:20When I lost my Hilda,

02:23it took a while.

02:24Fine.

02:25Why don't you just take some time?

02:26There is no time.

02:28I need to get out there, get warmed up.

02:30What for?

02:31One week.

02:32To the big one.

02:35What, the expo?

02:37There'll be others, Bun.

02:38Nah.

02:42They won't.

02:43It's an annual event, Bun.

02:45It happens every year.

02:49Oh.

02:50Oh, Christ.

02:51What happened last night?

02:52You brought shame to the House of Eternity Enterprises.

02:55Yeah, I also pissed myself.

02:58You all right, Bun?

02:59You all right, Beedle?

03:00We're going down the Bedford for a little drinky-poos.

03:02I'll come.

03:08We've got to hit the road.

03:09What, no school today?

03:10We're shaking the money tree.

03:12Getting ready for the big one.

03:14Right, Dad?

03:15Right.

03:16Now, Geoffrey,

03:17if you'd be so very kind,

03:18give me the fucking list.

03:20Okay, Bunny.

03:21You're the boss.

03:23No, Geoffrey, you're the boss.

03:25I just happen to be the only guy in this two-bit operation

03:27who has the faintest fucking idea how to sell anything.

03:33He's not wrong.

03:34Oh, baby.

03:36It's a commitment.

03:38It's a commitment.

03:39It's a commitment, baby.

03:40I know my wife, don't work.

03:43It's a commitment, baby.

03:46It's a commitment.

03:47I met my wife coming back

03:53We got to love one another or die, brother

04:10We got to love one another or die, oh baby

04:14Cause it's super glue, it's super glue, it's super glue

04:24Knock him down

04:29Knock him down

04:32My gift to you

04:49She lives in Newhaven

04:51Ouch

04:52You will find her the most accommodating customer

04:57You think I've lost it, Pooh?

05:03No, of course not

05:05Of course not, mate

05:05I just thought it might help with the grieving process

05:08If I ever need your freebies, Poodle

05:09I'll ask for them

05:11At which point you can shoot me in the head

05:13Love you

05:19Love you too

05:22Now fuck off

05:23What now?

05:34We're going to relieve some boobs of their cabbage

05:36What?

05:38We're going to sell some stuff

05:40Yeah

05:43What does shaking the money tree actually mean?

06:02It's like this

06:03If you walk up to an oak tree

06:06One of those big solid bastards with roots that grow deep in the soil

06:10You walk up to a tree like that and give it a shake

06:13What happens?

06:14I don't know

06:15Well

06:16Nothing bloody happens, does it?

06:19You could stand there shaking it all day long

06:21All that's going to happen is your arms will get tired, right?

06:24Right?

06:27Yeah

06:27Of course

06:28But if you walk up to a skinny, dry, fucked up little tree

06:32With a withered trunk and a few leaves

06:34Clinging on for dear life

06:36And you put your hands round it

06:37And shake the shit out of it

06:39As we say in the trade

06:40Then those bloody leaves are going to come flying off, right?

06:43So

06:43The oak tree's the rich bastard

06:45And the skinny tree's the poor soul

06:46Who hasn't got any money

06:47Are you with me?

06:48Now

06:49That all sounds easier than it is, bunny boy

06:50Do you want to know why?

06:53Okay, dad

06:54Because every fucking bastard and his dog

06:56Has got hold of the little tree

06:57And it's shaking it for all it's worth

06:59The government

06:59The bloody landlord

07:00The lottery

07:01They don't have a chance in hell of winning

07:02All the useless shit

07:04They see on TV

07:05The fruit machines

07:06The bookies

07:07Every bastard and his three-legged

07:08One-eyed

07:08Tox-widden dog

07:10Is shaking this little tree

07:11For all it's worth

07:12So

07:13You've got to set yourself apart

07:17You've got to have something

07:20They think they need

07:21Above all else

07:23What's that?

07:25Hope

07:26The dream

07:28You've got to sell them the dream

07:32What's the dream?

07:41Me

07:41Right

07:45Not you

07:46You're the navigator

07:49You're in charge of the map

07:51Making sure we're headed in the right direction

07:54Very important job

07:55You up for it?

07:55Yeah

07:56So what do I do now?

07:58You wait in the car

07:59Okay

08:03Hi boys

08:05Now

08:12Let's see what we have here

08:13Amanda

08:14I've got you down

08:14For the Moroccan Rose Bath Oil

08:16Renutri-lifting cream

08:17Plus you wanted the dermo expertise

08:19I saw this

08:20And

08:21Bottle of scotch

08:22In a good night's sleep

08:24Oh yeah right

08:25We're my kids

08:26You know what I mean

08:27Now Zoe

08:27I'm very disappointed in you

08:30I'm sorry he's disappointed

08:32Hello

08:32You've ordered the geranium and orange bath oil

08:34And the eye solace

08:35But

08:36And it pains me to say this

08:37You've not

08:39Ordered

08:40The lifting cream

08:41Oh you absolute fiend

08:44Oh you absolute fiend

08:44Am I in trouble Mr. Munro

08:46100% plant oil

08:48Natural fragrance

08:49Liquid heaven

08:50Barry White's in a bottle

08:52It's a big bottle isn't it

08:54You know what baffles me is why a woman as fine as yourself

09:00Fears it justifiable to deny her body the very thing

09:03It aches for

09:04I'm very very disappointed in you

09:09Buy the bloody cream

09:12Right

09:12I'll take it

09:14Marvellous

09:15Now

09:15Georgia

09:17I've got you down for the bath oil

09:22The hair mask

09:22The pro-collagen night cream

09:24And

09:25Anything else

09:28Anything

09:33Um

09:33I know

09:36I fucking get seen to

09:39Now

09:40Ladies

09:42What I am shocked

09:44And quite frankly appalled

09:46I'm a bona fide professional

09:47But then again they do say that

09:49A satisfied customer is a loyal customer

09:51So we can't leave you

09:53Unsatisfied

09:56Can

09:57Learn

10:06Go and watch telly

10:09Go

10:10Out you go

10:12Go on

10:13Come on

10:16Yours

10:19Uh yeah

10:21Precious

10:23Uh

10:27Do you have any kids Mr Munro or

10:32Yeah I do

10:33A boy

10:35How old is he

10:37Seven

10:40Ten maybe

10:43I'm afraid ladies the time has crept up on me

10:52Come on

10:53It's still early

10:54What uh

10:55Taste

11:10Uh

11:12Dude

11:13Dang

11:13Uh

11:14attitude

11:14Uh

11:15I love you

11:15Stay

11:16幫 me

11:17Yeah

11:17Turn

11:18Where

11:18You

11:19Are

11:20Blizzard

11:21You

11:21Who

11:21Oh, my God.

11:51...shopping in Birmingham descended into chaos.

11:54When a man now dubbed, the horned killer appeared.

11:58Horrified witnesses noted the presence of fresh blood on the garden forky wheels.

12:03Residents of Birmingham have been advised...

12:05It's time to get the hell out of this town.

12:09It's done.

12:12It's gone sour.

12:14Me too.

12:18Yeah, why the fuck not?

12:21Okay.

12:22Great.

12:25Where are we going to go?

12:27Where do you want to go?

12:30Mummy always said she liked to live in the countryside one day on a farm.

12:34I think I'd like that too.

12:37Okey dokey, farm it is.

12:38Yeah.

12:40Cool.

12:41Can we have animals?

12:42It'd be a pretty crap farm with no animals, wouldn't it?

12:45Yeah.

12:46Pretty crap, all right.

12:47Can we have chickens?

12:50Of course we can.

12:51And cows?

12:52Blocks of them.

12:54Herds.

12:55Them too.

12:55And a great big horny bull.

12:58And an alligator.

13:01But...

13:02Fuck it.

13:02Two big bastard alligators.

13:05But we don't get alligators on a farm.

13:08Well, you do on our farm, mate.

13:11Eh?

13:14Okay.

13:15Right, come on then, navigator.

13:16Oh yeah, good lad.

13:35Good lad.

13:37You all right, mate?

13:38He's only having a go, you kiddo.

13:40Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it.

13:43Good, good, good.

13:47Inyo.

13:48Right, come on then, navigator.

13:50Your chance will shine.

13:52Where are we going?

13:57Erm...

13:58Charlotte, Parnovar, Shoreham.

14:01Have you been there before?

14:03Nope, but I know we're going to have some fun.

14:06Are we?

14:07Yeah.

14:14Shoreham's...

14:15Shoreham, it's right there.

14:19Ow.

14:22What is wrong with you?

14:23I told you, it's my eyes.

14:28I need cream.

14:30Mummy used to get it from chemists, but...

14:34All right, here's what we'll do.

14:43I'll drop you at a chemist, and while I go and take care of the lovely Charlotte Parnovar,

14:47you can get your cream, all right?

14:50On my own?

14:51Yeah.

14:52I'll be quick.

14:54Yeah.

14:54Oh, yeah.

14:56It's the Bourbon girls.

14:58They're all the same.

15:00Trapped in their immaculate little identikit houses.

15:03They contact the office asking for a free demonstration of this cream, that bomb.

15:07Whatever.

15:08Not what they really want, not what they're secretly playing for.

15:11What's that?

15:12A real man to smash through their doors and tear their fucking lights apart for half an hour.

15:18And that's you, right, Dad?

15:19That's absolutely right, Bunny, my boy.

15:32There's a chemist down on the high street.

15:35You go and get your cream.

15:36Okay.

15:41Listen, I won't be long, so you go and get your cream, then come back and wait for me here on those steps.

15:49Good.

15:56Don't talk to strangers!

16:19Brida Kahlo.

16:35Beautiful.

16:36Isn't she?

16:41You okay?

16:42Yeah.

16:46Just not quite feeling myself today.

16:49Anyway, let's get back to business, shall we?

16:52So this replenishing cream is just heaven for the tootsies, miss.

16:55May I call you Charlotte?

16:57Sure.

16:58Or you can call me Bunny.

17:02Bunny?

17:03You are joking, right?

17:13Oh, I'm deadly serious.

17:16And you know what they say about bunnies.

17:18What do they say?

17:20Well, you know, that they...

17:22I don't know what they say.

17:25Does this routine actually work on the ladies, Bunny?

17:38Yeah.

17:42Did you just wink at me?

17:44Maybe.

17:46Oh, you are beyond belief.

17:47So they tell me.

17:48Now, this rub will make you feel...

17:51Where did you crawl from, Bunny?

17:53The tarpits.

17:54Like the princess you've always deserved to be.

17:56You're a dodo.

17:58You should have a sign hanging around your neck saying extinct.

18:00Hey.

18:01I don't know what you think is going on here, but...

18:05I'm just trying to do my job, okay?

18:08Trying to make a living.

18:08Trying to provide for my son.

18:10Your son?

18:12You've got a son?

18:13Yeah.

18:14Where is he?

18:17He...

18:17He's waiting for me.

18:21Lucky boy.

18:23I'm sorry, Mr. Munro.

18:33I've gone too far.

18:37I think I've wounded you.

18:38No.

18:40You haven't.

18:42It's all right.

18:44I just need to use your bathroom.

18:46What?

18:47Yeah.

18:48I've been on the road all day.

18:50I need to go so much I can taste it.

18:55Oh, you're a class act.

18:58Stay in the hall.

18:58I need to go.

19:06I need to go.

19:07I need to go.

19:10I need to go.

19:12Oh, fuck it.

19:19Yeah, whatever.

19:24Oh, you stupid one.

19:28Yeah, you can't get it.

19:31Oh.

19:34And on your fucking magazine.

19:37Go on.

19:44Oh, what a piss.

19:54There's a coupé.

19:57Naughty, naughty.

20:07Can I help?

20:09Yes, please.

20:10I need some eye cream.

20:13Choram...

20:15Chloramphenicol?

20:16Yes.

20:25That's £3.98, then, please.

20:28Can I stay in here for a little bit?

20:39Okay.

20:49You okay?

20:50I think so.

20:52My mum usually does it.

20:55Right, and where's your mum?

21:00She's dead.

21:04I'm sorry.

21:06It's okay.

21:08She must have wanted to die.

21:10That's why it's not so sad.

21:13So...

21:17Who's looking after you?

21:19My dad.

21:21We're on the road.

21:23Shaking the money tree.

21:25That means selling.

21:28And where is he now, your dad?

21:32I don't know.

21:43I don't know.

22:08Bingo.

22:13Right, do you want to buy any of this shit or not?

22:29I detect a note of hostility.

22:32Yeah, well, us dodos get like that sometimes.

22:35What are you going to do about it?

22:36I'm going to ask you to get the fuck out of my house.

22:39I'm leaving.

22:39But just so you know, I just pissed all over your bathroom.

22:43What?

22:45All over the walls, the carpet, your woman's magazine.

22:48You what?

22:48With your fucking toothbrush.

22:51What?

22:53You just...

22:54And you can take this and shove your ass.

23:06Fuck!

23:07What?

23:10Last six little milk tea.

23:13All gone bad.

23:15Won't move on by now.

23:17Won't get on.

23:19Won't move on.

23:21I won't get on.

23:23I'll drive my little flames.

23:26I'll drive you a fucking shit.

23:28I'll drive my little flames.

23:31былаYou raunch.

24:32I almost forgot your face.

24:37Sweetheart, I think you ought to go to your nan's.

24:50Yeah.

24:53She doesn't want me.

24:55She doesn't want to help your dad.

24:58If you asked her.

25:01But me and dad are going to get a farm.

25:04Oh, yeah.

25:06With the crocodiles.

25:10I just think maybe your dad's not brilliant at looking after anyone who isn't your dad.

25:20I guess he's not much good at that either.

25:31Junior!

25:32Well, he didn't hang himself from the curtains, did he?

25:37You all right?

25:52Question.

25:53Who's the coolest fucking dad in the world?

25:58Whoa.

25:59It's amazing.

26:01Wait till we get up to the room, buddy boy.

26:03You're going to love it.

26:04I'm going to show you the weirdest thing in the world.

26:08What?

26:09I'm talking completely wacko jacko.

26:10What?

26:11No, I mean seriously, like off the planet, Janet.

26:14What?

26:15What?

26:16The tiniest fucking soaps you've ever seen in your entire life.

26:18Can I help?

26:19Certainly you can.

26:20Nicest room you've got.

26:21Where did you get that?

26:22Where did I get it?

26:23Buddy boy.

26:24You are aware you're talking to the primo, creme de la creme, number one salesman in the

26:25hole of Brighton, right?

26:26What?

26:27I'm talking completely wacko jacko.

26:28I'm talking completely wacko jacko.

26:29What?

26:30No, I mean seriously, like off the planet, Janet.

26:31What?

26:32The tiniest fucking soaps you've ever seen in your entire life.

26:34Can I help?

26:35Certainly you can.

26:36Nicest room you've got.

26:37Where did you get that?

26:38Where did I get that?

26:39Buddy boy.

26:40You are aware you're talking to the primo, creme de la creme, number one salesman in the

26:50world of Brighton, right?

26:51Yeah.

26:52Of course.

26:53I could sell a bicycle to a barracuda.

26:55Our Elizabeth room, sir.

26:57Elizabeth?

26:58I could sell two bicycles to a barracuda.

27:04I'm telling you.

27:05Mate, I could sell the whole bloody bike shed.

27:09Come on you bald prick, give me some good news.

27:15We've had a complaint.

27:17Woman called and said she had some money missing.

27:20Now, obviously I told her that we at Eternity Enterprises are not in a habit of employing

27:25thieves.

27:26But she's threatening to ring the police bun.

27:29And also, your dad's carer call.

27:33You're right about the soaps dad.

27:35They're so tiny.

27:37Can you teach me?

27:56How to be a salesman like you.

28:00I'm not a very good navigator and I don't like being left on my own.

28:15Okay?

28:16Really?

28:17Teach her everything I know.

28:18What are you doing?

28:19Checking the monetary.

28:20Give me the flipping money!

28:52Uh, go home.

29:02Into bed.

29:22Look at me, bunny.

29:52That's all you had to do, bunny.

30:22Stop looking everywhere else.

30:28We have it all.

30:32I want to do.

30:34So why didn't you take it, you dope?

30:42I don't know.

30:48Yes, you do.

30:52I don't know.

31:03I don't know.

33:35Your mate told you where I live, didn't he?

33:40And what did he say about me?

33:43He said you were a most accommodating customer.

33:48Oh, did he now?

33:51Most obliging, he said.

33:54Generous, even.

33:56Tell me more about the cream.

33:58Well, Pamela.

34:08This rich, hydrating, age-targeting lotion.

34:18Are you all right?

34:29Are you all right?

34:30It's been a hard day.

34:36It's been a hard day.

34:37Do you like pussy, Barney?

34:46I love it.

34:48How much do you love it?

34:51I love it beyond all things.

34:53I love it more than life itself.

34:57Do you love my pussy?

35:01Yeah.

35:02Yeah.

35:03I do.

35:04I love it beyond all reason.

35:08I love it beyond all reason.

35:09I love it beyond all the cows, come out.

35:15Come and get it.

35:24What's your name?

35:25Penny charade.

35:26What's yours?

35:27Bunny.

35:28Bunny.

35:29Bunny.

35:30Bunny.

35:31Bunny Monroe.

35:33I've got a feeling about you.

35:38I think things are gonna get a whole lot worse.

35:43I know.

35:54I know.

35:55I know.

35:56I know.

35:57I know.

35:58I know.

35:59I know.

36:00I know.

36:01I know.

36:02I know.

36:03I know.

36:04I know.

36:05I know.

36:06I know.

36:07I know.

36:08I know.

36:09I know.

36:10I know.

36:11I know.

36:12I know.

36:13I know.

36:14I know.

36:15I know.

36:16I know.

36:17I know.

36:18I know.

36:19I know.

36:20I know.

36:21I know.

36:22I know.

36:23There's a church in his wings

36:25There's a fox and a rabbit

36:27And a nun in her heaven

36:29I'm on fire

36:30Yeah, babe, I'm on fire

36:34Well, my mate Bill Gates

36:39There's a person in the United States

36:41There's a slacker and the worker

36:43And the girl in her burger

36:45I'm on fire

36:46Yeah, babe, I'm on fire

36:50Yeah, the general with his tank says

36:55And the man at the bank says

36:57A soldier with his ruckus

36:58And the mouse in my pocket

37:00I'm on fire

37:01Yeah, babe, I'm on fire

37:06Well, the drug at a wreck

37:10With a needle in his neck

37:12Says a drunk, says a punk, says

37:14And pray for this man

37:16I'm on fire

37:17Will think I'm on fire

37:22All right now

37:24If you have been affected

37:30by any of the issues raised in this programme

37:32help is available online

37:34at sky.com forward slash viewer support

37:37And again, we'll see you next time

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