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  • 2 days ago
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00:00Guys, look what came today.
00:02Yay!
00:03Today, we are going to be giving Nick
00:06the special boudoir calendar that we made.
00:10I was just feeling a little insecure that day in my lingerie.
00:13Her negative self-talk can just kind of create
00:16a bad energy in the house.
00:18You need no armor here.
00:19Put your shield down.
00:23I have kind of been talking to someone else.
00:25I have knots in my stomach right now.
00:27Like, we're cheating on her.
00:30Have you started dating other women?
00:32I went on a date with someone.
00:35Her and Angelica didn't feel right.
00:36The three of us didn't feel right.
00:37Angelica met this person.
00:38Yeah, she met her before.
00:40Wow.
00:40I find out he was dating somebody else.
00:42Now, Angelica lied to me about it.
00:45I just, I can't do this anymore.
00:48I'm definitely heartbroken right now.
00:51There's no coming back from this.
00:54So, do I get to meet your wife?
00:56Do you want to?
00:56Yes.
00:57OK.
00:57Things have been going so well with Randy.
00:59I really feel like there's some type of connection.
01:02Meet me and my date.
01:04That's so weird.
01:06I think Billy is underestimating what the real emotional impact
01:10will be once this starts rolling.
01:14Oh, bonita.
01:15I've been waiting for me and Lorena to get married.
01:18This is exciting.
01:19All right.
01:19See you in a minute.
01:20Love you.
01:22I mean, it's just a piece of paper.
01:23I know that, but Simone makes me feel a little bit plus tied to Garrick.
01:28Garrick and Lorena just went inside the county building here in Aspen, and they are going to come out Mr. and Mrs. Merrifield.
01:41No other people could go in, so just waiting.
01:44Just waiting.
01:45Lorayna absolutely, like, her and I have a great connection, and I think, like, it couldn't be any better.
01:52Really, and...
01:53I don't want to be emotional because I know it's, like, exciting for Lorayna and Garrick and all this,
02:09Really, and...
02:17I don't want to be emotional because I know it's like exciting for Lorraine and Garrick and all this.
02:26Okay, that's enough of that.
02:39Da-da-da.
02:41Oh, my God!
02:43I love you!
02:45Huh? Fair.
02:47Miss Merrifield, Mr. and Mrs. Merrifield!
02:51Finally, today I married Garrick, and I'm very happy.
02:59Congratulations!
03:01Lorraine is going to be able to stay here in America, and we're going to actually be a family.
03:05Yes, the ficha is actually sinking in, because everything happened so quickly like him in my life, and is getting married.
03:11It's actually been a dream.
03:19Oh, my God!
03:21Oh, my God!
03:23Oh, my God!
03:25Oh, my God!
03:27Oh, my God!
03:29Oh, my God!
03:31Oh, my God!
03:33Oh, my God!
03:34Oh, my God!
03:36They can frame this.
03:37Official!
03:40It's kind of surreal, like, to think that after so many years, it's finally gotten to the point where we're actually living this as a family.
03:51It's real.
03:52With a future, you know, where we can actually grow a family, where more children, and every day we can actually be together, you know?
04:00I have to take trips to see each other all the time.
04:02Yeah.
04:03That's such a relief.
04:04Oh, yo!
04:05Hi!
04:06How are you doing?
04:07Good, how are you?
04:08Good, good.
04:09My name's Frank.
04:10Frank, I'm Garrick.
04:11What are you doing here?
04:12Well, we just got married.
04:13Oh, congratulations!
04:14Oh, thank you!
04:15Thank you!
04:16So which one is your wife?
04:18Which girls married with you?
04:20Both.
04:22Both?
04:23Oh, so...
04:26Okay.
04:27Which one is the first?
04:28She's the first.
04:29Oh, she's the first?
04:30Yeah.
04:31She's the second?
04:32Yeah.
04:33Yeah.
04:34You have a good life?
04:35Yeah.
04:36All right, great!
04:38I want to give you a shout for the congregation for your marriage.
04:43Oh!
04:44Who won the first?
04:45Lorena.
04:46All right, we do the one shot!
04:50Two shot!
04:53Three shot!
04:55All right, winner!
04:57Yeah!
04:58Yeah!
04:59Okay, all right, good!
05:01Good!
05:02So you enjoy it!
05:03Cheers!
05:04Cheers!
05:05Familia.
05:06Familia.
05:07Familia.
05:08And Deus.
05:09And Deus.
05:10Number one, same.
05:16Now, I am Merrifield.
05:20Si.
05:21Si, Familia.
05:22I think, you know, being three months into Lorena being here is still fresh.
05:26I think there's still a lot of settling in to do, even after three months.
05:30One for all, all for the team.
05:34You know, I really want her marriage with Garrick to be blessed.
05:37I really want them to be strong, because when her relationship with Garrick's strong,
05:42then it makes mine and Garrick's relationship that much strong, and then all of us stronger together.
05:47You know, I think there is a little bit of a lingering sadness.
05:51I'm very happy for Garrick and Lorena.
05:53But like, you know, it's opening up our home and our safe place.
05:56Cheers!
05:57Cheers!
05:58Cheers!
05:59Cheers!
06:02I'm wondering how the future is going to look for all of us.
06:06You ready for some drinks?
06:07Yes!
06:08All right.
06:09Let's get it.
06:10I know.
06:11So I met Randy at a public playground.
06:13We started off around there, and things are going really well.
06:20So I want her to meet Billy and kind of see, you know, what Billy thinks of her.
06:26Actually, I have a text from Billy, meet me and my date.
06:44That's so weird.
06:47I can't wait to meet her.
06:49Is she coming now?
06:50Yeah, she should be here anytime.
06:51Ok.
06:52I have never had an open relationship.
06:54I've never had a polygamous relationship.
06:58So I am nervous to meet Billie
07:00because I want to get to the bottom
07:02of how she feels about all this.
07:04So, you want to play 20 questions?
07:06Oh, dear lord, I guess, let's do it.
07:10So, what is the craziest place
07:13you've ever had sex before?
07:14The foot of the bed.
07:18I told you, I'm pretty vanilla.
07:21I would say maybe a car, but nothing.
07:24Too crazy?
07:25Yeah.
07:26That's okay?
07:27I was like a late bloomer and stuff,
07:29so where's the craziest place that you had ever?
07:33The one that sticks out, it's not really crazy,
07:35but on the beach.
07:36Mmm.
07:37It's not fun.
07:38I was gonna say, a lot of sand, man.
07:42Kudos.
07:43What is a crazy sexual position you've ever done?
07:49Okay, can I say one that I don't like?
07:52The one?
07:53Yeah, go for it.
07:54Reverse cowgirl.
07:56Reverse cowgirl.
07:57Just be, because sometimes everything doesn't line up
08:02and they're, it can be painful.
08:06So, but I like everything else.
08:12So, the date is going really well.
08:16I feel like a little giddy schoolgirl, like, like, I don't know, like, I haven't been on many first dates and stuff, so like, to have it go so well, I have like this, like, sense of guilt almost, like, like, I have this dissonance of like, okay, this is like, this is good, but also this is, like, this is bad that I'm feeling this way.
08:36Like, like, I just kept feeling myself, like, like, look for her and be like, oh, no, is she around? Did I say that? Did she hear it? Like, but no, it's okay. It's okay. It's okay. She's, she's given me permission for this.
08:47Hi. Hi. How are you doing?
08:51Good. How are you?
08:52This is Billy. I'll give you a hug. I'm a hugger.
08:55Sorry. I'll have a seat. I hope his conversation was good.
09:00It is. It's, and it's going to be even better now.
09:03Yeah. She's been excited. You'll get some tea.
09:05I've been wanting to meet you. Yes. Yes.
09:07You guys are, like, a lot alike, and it's weird.
09:12Can you handle, too?
09:14I don't know. Like, shoot. This is a lot.
09:19So, thanks for coming out and going on a date with him. What made you, like, interested?
09:25We were talking about kids. Raising kids is so difficult on its own.
09:29Right.
09:30I have not had the partner that I've always wanted to be there for me to help me raise the kids.
09:36So, having, like, a village. We were talking about, like, a village to raise these kids, and I love kids.
09:41She has three kids. They're all different ranges. I love it. She's got, like, they're, like, stair steps.
09:46They're all 17, 14, and 5. Oh, okay. I wish I would have had more.
09:50She has Bibby fever, by the way. I do. I do.
09:52Sorry. Dang it. No, I said no. I told you.
09:54My first impression of Randy is that she's very friendly. She's very welcoming and open.
09:59She didn't seem, like, put off by me coming in. We seem to have a lot in common right now. So, I think that's a good place to start.
10:07So, how has it been going? Has everything been going good? You want some tea on him? Some...
10:12I would love some tea on him. Oh, no.
10:15Give me the tea on... Or the D.
10:18Someone's getting a little... I'm sorry.
10:21I'm excited. So, anyways, what do you want to know? What kind of things do you want to know about him?
10:28Well, okay. He said he was really vanilla. Okay. Yes.
10:32So, does he just lay there?
10:37That's another good way to put it. Do you have to do all the work?
10:39That's a good way to put it. Or do you have to change that?
10:42Yeah, no. He will if you let him. So, you've got to be like, no, we're doing this.
10:46I try hard.
10:49He just needs to get beat.
10:56Seeing him, like, laughing and joking and, like, clearly get along was...
11:01It was good to see because that's what you want to see.
11:03But at the same time, it makes you have some feelings inside that you're like,
11:06oh, why is it so easy for him to laugh with her already?
11:10Like, why is it so easy for you to just, like, joke?
11:14So...
11:16Okay, interesting. All right.
11:20That kind of makes me a little nervous, but...
11:24All right, so how are you going to feel about jealousy?
11:27Like, if I'm sitting on your couch in your house and we're holding hands or something, like, is that...
11:32I've never felt it before. I've never seen him with someone else.
11:35So, like, obviously him going on a date, like, today, it was...
11:39How was that for you?
11:41I won't lie, in the beginning I was like, it's kind of weird that I don't know what's going on.
11:46And so, I mean, there was a little bit of, like, intrigue to be like, is he having fun without me?
11:51Right, right.
11:52Like, what's he doing?
11:54Full new world, full new world.
11:56So, what would happen in, like, your case with jealousy?
11:59So, like, how would you react to how you feel?
12:03Because obviously, like, she's first wife.
12:05Right.
12:06Like, would you be okay with that?
12:09You know, I am not sure because I've never done this before.
12:13Okay.
12:14Right?
12:15Would you be okay? I'm sorry.
12:16I mean, I might get jealous. I can't say I wouldn't.
12:18Billie carries herself with a lot of strength, and she shows facial expressions that she's not comfortable.
12:30Maybe she was jealous.
12:32I want to believe that she won't be jealous, but we never know.
12:37I know.
12:43I'm home.
12:44How'd it go?
12:46It was a time.
12:47I've been home all evening, waiting for Matt and Shanae's date to end.
12:53All right. Come on. Tell me everything.
12:55I'm really nervous. I'm anxious.
12:58Well, um...
13:00If they left me, I would be devastated because I'm never going to find that kind of love.
13:09Things have been tense at home. I'm starting to wear a little thin on the Davises.
13:14I can't this up.
13:30I'm home.
13:31Babe?
13:32Hey.
13:33I've been home all evening, waiting for Matt and Shanae's date to end.
13:47How was it? How'd it go?
13:49It was a time.
13:51I'm really nervous. I'm anxious. I'm... I don't know. I'm just a ball of mixed emotions.
13:59All right. Come on. Tell me everything. Let's go.
14:03You want to know everything?
14:05I want to know everything. All the details.
14:10Well, um...
14:14She broke up with us.
14:17Okay. Um...
14:25Okay.
14:29I'm really sad. As soon as Matt opened up his mouth, I could already see the words coming out. And it just hit me right in my heart. And I could feel just like a hole.
14:48I did try.
14:51What I always say, the worst you can say is no. So why not try?
14:57Do you...
14:59Like, do you think there's any chance that we'd be able to, you know, get Shanae back?
15:07I don't think so. Like, I... From, you know, what I got tonight at dinner, I just think she's done. You know, I think she's done with everything.
15:22I did tell her that, you know, we went on a date together. Um, I kind of think that might have been where she really kind of drew her line.
15:31I didn't tell her.
15:33That wasn't for you to tell her.
15:36I can definitely see how, you know, that upset her. I just don't want her to, you know, feel like I was going behind her back.
15:47I'm sorry I put you in the middle of this. She was, like, your best friend.
15:53Yeah.
15:56I wanted more years. I wanted more years. Three is not enough. I definitely wanted forever.
16:03My heart feels broken. The three of us together just made sense. And we all care for each other. We all respect each other.
16:11You know, we were able to spend time with each other outside of a physical or romantic thing, just spend time together and just be in the moment.
16:23You know, and for me to care this much and for her this much, she means a lot.
16:30We spent all this time and energy and love trying to build something together over these last three years.
16:38You know, we've had this vision of what we all want, how our family will grow and become one unit.
16:49And now it seems like everything's just going down the drain.
16:53So where do you guys think you go from here?
17:00Where do we go from here?
17:02You know, over time, I do want to continue searching for a sister-wife because it did bring a lot to our relationship and our family.
17:11I do need a little bit of time to process what I'm feeling.
17:15Let the pain kind of subside, and then we can discuss, like, what we'll do next.
17:21It wasn't supposed to happen.
17:24The reason why I started this sister-wife search was because I didn't have the support.
17:31I don't have the village.
17:32I don't have a community.
17:34But I'm hurting.
17:36I think I have to go back to basics.
17:38Let me go back to my community where I came from, see if I can get the support there.
17:44My sister Chastity is the only one in the family that knows about this.
17:51And even she has a lot of strong opinions.
17:55My mom and my aunts know absolutely nothing.
17:59My mother-in-law is very opinionated.
18:04She doesn't mince words at all.
18:06With Shanae being gone, things are definitely going to change.
18:11At this point, I'm just pretty much it.
18:15I need my family around, and I am going to take this risk and let them in to our relationship.
18:24And hopefully, you know, it is received well, and I will have a family that I can turn to.
18:32This sucks.
18:34It does suck.
18:41Man, I'm not a pool shark, but it's definitely my happy place.
18:56I don't even know the last time I played Polteresa.
18:59Today, I'm taking my friend Brandon to a pool hall.
19:02Brandon has been my dear friend for about 20 years now.
19:06I met him back in high school, and he's always been my sounding board,
19:12and he's always been someone to really uplift me when I'm feeling low.
19:15Thank you, Brandon. You're the best.
19:17You're welcome.
19:18Wow, this place is busy.
19:20Oh my goodness, I know.
19:22So things have been tense at home.
19:25Meltdowns and the negative self-talk have become more frequent.
19:30I've had a lot of abusive relationships that I'm still healing from.
19:35And over the last several weeks, Nick has tried to come and talk to me about how I'm feeling and the concerns that he's having.
19:42And April and Jenny will say, it's okay. We're here. We love you.
19:48I think they are getting tired of me running away and not addressing the issues when they bring them up.
19:55Maybe I shouldn't have worn heels, but you know, I can bend down pretty well.
19:59I'm starting to wear a little thin on the Davises, so it's nice to get out and go see a friend and kind of vent a little bit.
20:08I don't think you made any of them in.
20:10No, I didn't.
20:11When I found out Teresa was joining Nick's family and the dynamic that she was going into, I was excited for her.
20:18I don't really know Nick and his family, to be honest.
20:22I do know that they have been having some issues, but that's why I'm here today, hoping we can get to the bottom of it.
20:32Hey, look at that.
20:33What is new with you?
20:34What's going on?
20:35Um, you know, we've been just, it's been hard, Brandon.
20:40It's been really hard.
20:41You know, I just feel like all my past trauma and stuff is what's hindering me from having like a genuine connection with him.
20:50And then on top of it, I have a lot of healing that I have to do.
20:55Like they're always having to give me pep talks.
20:57They're always having to remind me and reassure me that I'm like, there's no reason to be insecure, especially in this type of relationship.
21:06But I don't think I'm worthy of this type of relationship.
21:10I'm just taking up so much of their time because I have so much healing to do.
21:17Um.
21:18What do you think you need to do?
21:20What do you feel?
21:21I just feel like I'm making their lives like miserable.
21:25I have seen Teresa get down on herself in the past.
21:30I've known her for 20 years and I know she has a lot of love to give.
21:34But I do know that Teresa's had a lot of trauma in her life and in her past.
21:39It's played a big role in how she goes with day to day life.
21:44She just needs a little bit more affirmation than other people.
21:47Are your insecurities bringing down the house?
21:51I want to hear like how you are viewing things from you.
21:56Yeah, I think I'm constantly comparing myself to Jenny and April.
22:03Um.
22:04I feel like they're more wife material than me.
22:08I'm not as valuable as they are.
22:11And I never will be.
22:13You are.
22:14Don't ever say that.
22:16You are.
22:17I have a lot of shame.
22:21A lot of things that make me feel like I'm not good enough for a monogamous relationship,
22:25let alone a polygamous one.
22:27You know?
22:28Mm-hmm.
22:29I don't think anybody on this planet Earth is gonna love me to the degree that Nick loves me.
22:34And I definitely feel like polygamy is the best route for me.
22:38But I'm still wrapping my head around the fact that Nick loves multiple women.
22:44I know that I have a lot of work to do and it's an uphill battle.
22:49My biggest fear right now is losing them.
22:55Where do you want to go from here?
22:59If I left them, I would be devastated.
23:02Or if they left me, I would be devastated.
23:05Because I'm never going to find that kind of love.
23:08I would be so devastated, Brandon.
23:11Like, I can't this up.
23:13Excuse me.
23:14Mess this up.
23:15Like, I can't.
23:18Hey.
23:23I love you.
23:45Right here?
23:46Yeah.
23:47Okay.
23:50So, how are you doing?
23:52I don't know if I want to go to me yet.
23:54There's just so much.
23:55You want to know all the dirty details?
23:57Yes.
23:59Oh, my gosh.
24:00Give me what you have.
24:02Oh, my gosh.
24:04Samantha has definitely always been a big supporter of my marriage with Garrick.
24:08So I'm hoping today I can just unload a little bit on Samantha and get my emotions and feelings out and hopefully feel strengthened.
24:16I was waiting outside the courthouse for like 30, 40 minutes and it was kind of like a little emotional outside.
24:22Yeah.
24:23Kind of weird, right?
24:24Yeah.
24:25Like just knowing that he's now legally married to someone else.
24:28Yeah.
24:29I think like it settled in my heart like he still loves me and like it doesn't matter about the piece of paper, but knowing now that he shares that with someone else, I can't ever have that with him.
24:40I think it was just a little bit, you know.
24:43That would be weird.
24:44A little bit hard.
24:45Yeah.
24:46In my heart like I almost wish he like didn't have to be legally married to anybody.
24:53Yeah.
24:54All Lorena and Garrick being married, it's definitely weird.
24:58Me and my husband have questioned like, is this what you want or are you just doing this to make your husband happy?
25:03And she says, no, I feel like this is what God wants for me.
25:06So I'm like, okay.
25:08You know, it's just been you and Garrick and you're sharing a bed and now you have to like, not share a bed with him every day.
25:15Like, how's that going?
25:16Like, you know.
25:17Honestly, it's been going really smoothly like we're, we're still altering every two days for her, two days for me.
25:23And then Garrick has off on Sundays.
25:25He's alone.
25:26Cause I would, I would think if I were ever living this lifestyle, I would want Garrick to, Sam to come into my bed.
25:33I wouldn't want like the sheets and you're being intimate and then somebody else like, do you change the sheets like every two days?
25:38Yeah.
25:39Like, how do you do that?
25:40Cause to me, that's kind of nasty.
25:42Nasty.
25:43I would want clean sheets.
25:45So Lorena and I are very respectful of each other, like cleaning up after ourselves.
25:55Yeah.
25:59It would be so much easier if we had separate rooms.
26:02Cause I know it's kind of a hassle for me and Lorena.
26:04Like I leave my toothbrush in Garrick's bathroom and it's, I'm supposed to be upstairs in the sister room.
26:08And then I have to like go downstairs and be like, can I get my toothbrush?
26:11I've been keeping my stuff in a, like a travel bag.
26:14This plural lifestyle, people live it differently.
26:16Like I don't live that lifestyle, but for me it'd just be, I like my space.
26:22I like my things where they need to be.
26:24Having to like carry my tote bag and not having it in my room.
26:28But I don't know if they, that's what they want to do.
26:31Wait, does Lorena want a third sister ride?
26:35We've been seeking still.
26:37She's okay with that?
26:39She is.
26:40She has her moments I think cause she's still adjusting to so much.
26:43Yeah.
26:44She knows like, this is the lifestyle.
26:46Like we're not done seeking, but I think being in America, missing your family, language,
26:52just learning English, you know, learning Garrick and me, our family dynamic, like feeling comfortable in the house.
26:57Seeking another sister wife has always been part of our plan for Garrick and I and Lorena has always understood that since we first started talking to her.
27:06But with Lorena's immigration status, it could take up to two years for her to get like full citizenship.
27:12So if we do find someone outside of the U.S., it may mean that we would have to wait at least two years for Garrick and Lorena to get divorced because we wouldn't want to risk her citizenship.
27:25I think it's a little hard for Lorena too, cause you know, Garrick and I have been together so long.
27:29So there's a lot of established trust and understanding with each other that she's still learning.
27:36I know Lorena is a strong person, but I honestly don't think that she's fully ready to add a third, cause I feel like it's such a different dynamic coming into a relationship versus adding someone else to that relationship.
27:50How do you handle all of that?
27:51It has to be stressful.
27:53Yeah, it's a lot.
27:54Jeez.
27:55That's the piece that is hard with potentially adding a third is that how will she handle that? How will she take that?
28:04Because that's always been a trigger point in the past for women.
28:07What happens if her and Garrick just aren't in a good spot one day, you know, and they're struggling and she's not feeling good about it?
28:13You know, what happens?
28:19I actually, I heard from Randy, she messaged me.
28:21Oh, really?
28:22What?
28:23I don't like that look.
28:24I know, maybe a little bit overwhelming seeing you guys get along so well.
28:30It's taken me for a little bit of a loop.
28:32It's super frustrating to be hearing all these negative emotions from Billie because this was her idea all along.
28:39Wow.
28:40Hi, babies.
28:41There you are.
28:42And there's an egg.
28:43Come on, baby.
28:44Come on.
28:45Let's go.
28:46Let's go.
28:47Come on.
28:48Oh, mom is so happy.
28:49That makes me very happy.
28:50Oh, eat that bug.
28:51Get it.
28:52Except for this.
28:53So in our household, Billie kind of does more of, we'll say, the masculine thing.
28:58She likes to change the oil, do some repairs.
29:04She likes to get some elbow grease going.
29:05We'll probably have to get a new air filter for it.
29:06I'm going to leave that in your court.
29:07I might scare the chicken, so be careful.
29:08I might scare the chicken, so be careful.
29:10Oh, I'm so happy.
29:11I'm so happy.
29:12That makes me very happy.
29:13Oh, eat that bug.
29:14Get it.
29:15Except for this.
29:16Reese, how do you know?
29:17Reese works.
29:18Facebook does more of we'll say the masculine thing.
29:21She likes to change the oil, do some repairs.
29:23She likes to get some elbow grease going.
29:27We'll probably have to get a new air filter for it.
29:30I'm going to leave that in your court.
29:35I might scare the chicken, so be careful.
29:36Reese, when it comes to typical man jobs, he runs the other way.
29:44Where were you hiding?
29:45Where were you?
29:47Come here, come on.
29:49Yeah, his honey-do list kind of stays a honey-do list.
29:51It's never a honey-done list.
29:56So, I actually, I heard from Randy, she messaged me.
30:03What?
30:04I don't like that look.
30:05I know, maybe a little bit overwhelming.
30:09Cause like walking in and seeing like you guys
30:14get along so well, kind of, I guess like hit me
30:17a little harder than I was anticipating.
30:23After sitting on it for a few days,
30:25I kind of festered and I'm feeling a little off my game.
30:29I am feeling jealous.
30:30There's a bit of me that's like, oof.
30:33It's a lot seeing him, you know,
30:36getting along with another woman with the intent of,
30:38you know, dating and marrying them.
30:41So are you having like reservations
30:43about still doing this?
30:44I don't think it's necessarily like
30:46about reservations about doing it.
30:47Like, I feel like we've got a good vibe.
30:51Like we all get along really well,
30:53but it's just, maybe it's like
30:55we get along too well right now.
30:57Like, how did you mesh so well and so easily that,
31:02like, I don't know, it's just,
31:03it's taken me for a little bit of a loop
31:05because I wasn't expecting it.
31:08Wow.
31:09This was my biggest concern.
31:11Were these gonna come up?
31:13Anything that I did,
31:14was it gonna make her uncomfortable?
31:16And I'm starting to see those feelings arise.
31:19It's super frustrating to be hearing all these, like,
31:22kind of negative emotions from Billie
31:24because this was her idea all along.
31:27So I've got to ask, do you like her?
31:31Like, do you have feelings for her already?
31:36If I'm being honest, yeah.
31:39Like, there's, I know there's something there.
31:42Okay.
31:45How's that make you feel?
31:49I'm excited because this is what we've been hoping for
31:52and I'm glad that you found somebody
31:54that could potentially vibe with us,
31:55but it makes me nervous.
31:58And what if, like, you fall in love with her
32:01and you fall out of love with me?
32:04Like, are you capable of loving two women at the same time?
32:09Like, what if she is everything that you've wanted for
32:14and you'd leave me?
32:18You really think that I would leave you?
32:20I mean, it's a fear.
32:24You know everything we've been through.
32:26I know.
32:27We'll never leave you.
32:28I love them so much.
32:30We've been through way too much.
32:33But, you know, like, it's something that's there.
32:36Right.
32:36I mean...
32:37So I wanted to tell you, like,
32:38I didn't want to lie or keep it from you, but...
32:40Well, I'm glad you're seeming more human
32:43because I knew this,
32:45I figured this would come up at some point,
32:47but this is the way we're going to get through it, though.
32:50Right.
32:51I want to kind of change the rules a little bit,
32:54just so that I can go on some dates, too.
32:59Maybe, like, every other date
33:01so that I can get to know her.
33:03That makes sense.
33:04You know, I think maybe that might
33:06make you feel more comfortable,
33:07so that's totally cool.
33:10Being new to this,
33:12we need to make sure we stay on the same page
33:14as we go through this,
33:16and, you know, like, we haven't been intimate
33:19or we haven't got to that point yet,
33:21and that's a whole other level of emotions and things,
33:26so I'm anxious to see what happens
33:28when we get to that point.
33:37I do have to make it very clear
33:40that we have reached a sort of a crossroad.
33:44Well, I think I'd like to have this conversation
33:46at another time.
33:47I don't like this disruption in my house.
33:49I got you.
33:50I got you.
33:51I'm going to go take a moment.
33:53Oh, thank you.
34:13Hey.
34:14What you got going on down here?
34:15Mocktails, if I guess you could call it that.
34:17Juice and wine glass.
34:18No alcohol in honor of Jenny's.
34:20Look, look at how fancy it looks.
34:23Things with Teresa have been...
34:25steadily difficult.
34:29It's kind of wearing on us all,
34:31the repetition of having to continually have pep talks
34:35and reassure her that she deserves to be here.
34:38We're going to sit down with Teresa
34:40and try to dig into some of the conversation
34:43that we know is necessary for us to have.
34:46Teresa.
34:47Teresa.
34:48Yeah.
34:48Here, come down.
34:49I made mocktails.
34:51Okay.
34:52Pour juice in the glass.
34:53What you talking about?
34:55Jen, I made mocktails.
34:57I'm not sure if Teresa is aware
34:59of how much energy it takes
35:02to put into trying to help her feel better,
35:06but it does create almost like an energy vampire
35:10type of atmosphere.
35:12Yeah, the mocktails in solidarity of Jennifer's condition.
35:17So we...
35:17Condition?
35:18Well...
35:18Keep it.
35:21But yes.
35:22Cheers.
35:23Instead of mocktails.
35:24Keep it non-alcoholic here.
35:25The mocktails.
35:26Yeah.
35:26For sure.
35:27I have to say, I think there's still some groundwork
35:38that we need to do between the four of us.
35:40You know, quite oftentimes, Teresa,
35:44you find yourself questioning whether or not
35:50this is a place where you belong.
35:52And I know that because of the fact
35:57that that's entirely tied to the way
36:01that you feel and view yourself,
36:04it makes it a difficult situation for us to address.
36:11You know, we were really talking about how, like,
36:16confidence and self-confidence, you know,
36:18is a big part of this.
36:20And being in this relationship,
36:21it's just going to naturally, like,
36:23bring some of those things out.
36:25There's going to be things
36:26that you're going to have to work on.
36:30They have oftentimes tried to talk to me
36:33about my self-destructive behavior,
36:38and I run or just sweep it under the rug.
36:42I knew this conversation was coming,
36:44and I was really trying to be mentally prepared for it.
36:49But now that it's here, it's terrifying.
36:52And I don't want to be here.
36:53I don't want to talk about this.
36:56I just want to shut down, to be honest.
36:59The way that you are about yourself, Teresa,
37:02it's causing disruptions in the harmony
37:05of our situation overall that,
37:08I mean, we just, we can't,
37:12we won't be able to function like that.
37:13Um, speaking of, um...
37:26You know, I just think, Teresa,
37:29like, how are you feeling?
37:30I don't know.
37:32Well, I think I'd like to have this conversation
37:34at another time.
37:35I'm going to go ahead and just go ahead
37:37and take a drive
37:39like I normally would, so...
37:42And, I mean, well, that's the thing, Teresa,
37:44is, like, running away from it never...
37:46Yeah.
37:47It makes it...
37:48We don't get to reconcile.
37:49We don't ever get to reconcile,
37:50and we want to reconcile.
37:51We won't get to reconcile it.
37:52I just need to have a moment.
37:54I'm sorry.
37:55Um, this is a lot right now.
37:59I do have to make it very clear
38:02that we have reached a sort of a crossroads where...
38:06I know. I got you.
38:07I got you.
38:08I'm going to go take a moment.
38:09Yeah.
38:10Good.
38:15I feel very sad,
38:17and I feel very ashamed
38:19that these people love me so much
38:24and they're so patient,
38:25yet I still somehow can't get it together.
38:29But this is what always happens,
38:31and then we never get to talk about anything.
38:37Well, I mean...
38:37Because she'll leave and then come back later
38:39and then act like nothing's wrong
38:40and not want to talk about anything.
38:42Right. Yeah.
38:43Every time that we've tried
38:44to have a conversation with Teresa,
38:46she basically just runs away.
38:47She avoids any kind of confrontation.
38:51It's not working.
38:52Someone needs to take the mic off me.
38:56Off me now.
38:57This mic off me.
39:03Will you please come talk to us?
39:05No, I'm okay.
39:06I'm done for the evening.
39:08Yeah.
39:09If she's, like, getting in the car
39:11and going for a drive or something,
39:12let her do that.
39:13I don't...
39:14I don't think I do want to go chase after her.
39:18I'm not going to sit up here,
39:19no, wait, no, Teresa, don't go.
39:20We'll do it for what?
39:22I'm mad.
39:22This is upsetting to me.
39:24We're trying to get our family established.
39:26If you don't want to understand that
39:28or you don't want to work towards that,
39:29well, then just never mind.
39:31I'm sitting here trying to have an adult conversation.
39:33I'm sitting here trying to work out some things.
39:34If you want to get up
39:35and act all flustered, all extra,
39:38you just get the up and go then.
39:41Like I said, it's at a point where it's like,
39:43look, we got to get this straight
39:45because I don't like this disruption in my house.
39:47One thing I absolutely will not tolerate
39:49from anybody coming into this situation
39:51is the disruption of the peace in my household.
40:00Danny and I haven't really talked about
40:02what happened at that dinner with Jackie.
40:05It's a lot to deal with when you're away
40:06from what really makes you happy.
40:08Watch that one, huh?
40:09Are you mad about it?
40:10I'm a little pissed about it.
40:12It sucked.
40:14You know, maybe I could have prevented
40:16the ending of everything.
40:21How do I know you're not just
40:23going to run away with my husband?
40:25And how am I supposed to know
40:27that I'm not always going to be second?
40:29We put all this effort, time, and energy,
40:32and for it to all just kind of be flushed away
40:35is really defeating.
40:40I don't want to have that constant energy
40:43in the house of being like,
40:45oh, you know what I mean?
40:46Walking on eggshells.
40:48You know, maybe let's give her a chance
40:52and like, you know, she'll work through it.
40:55She doesn't want to do that work.
40:56We need to just let her run away.
41:03There's been some things going on
41:05in, you know, my house, my family.
41:11Wait, where is it then?
41:13So Matt and I have actually been dating.
41:18You sure you're swinging?
41:19Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
41:20Listen, let her talk.
41:22Do you have a girlfriend?
41:24Help us, Jesus.
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